Subscribe
Share
Share
Embed
How to stop doubting yourself and trust the f**k up - a podcast about unbecoming all the things you thought you needed to be. Here’s to loving all parts of you & leaving NONE of you behind.
📍 here we're learning new things every day. This is where, how Miracle Miracles unfold.
You just have to be open and available to them.
Exactly. That's it. You have to also, you ask when you don't know, you ask. This is
true. Oh gosh. So funny. All right.
Um, also feels like a funny, um, segue into talking about embodiment because I think it can feel like a.
big word and like mm-hmm. , hard to understand concept, but really it's just like acting like the person that you are stepping into. Like really, I don't know. Fully. Yeah. Fully being,
yeah. And. I mean, I guess we, let's just say we've started cuz we
dive right
in. Yeah. Um, it is, and also I look at embodiment as we've got tools.
Mm-hmm. . So for me, the tool is to be acting as if mm-hmm. to move the energy. Right. Like for me, embodiment work is also moving stuck energy or just any energy that wants to move. Mm-hmm. . Yeah. And then, and then all the way to. Integration where you really are that woman you are, you have now become that person.
Like you can feel it in your being that you have shifted and so you are now embodied. Mm-hmm. . So yeah, I guess we get to, to talk all through this from like A to Z, but it is, it's such a buzzword in the industry, but like what does it actually mean? Yeah, and we're doing
it all the time. We're doing it all the time in small, like big and small ways.
It's like, you know, defining by all of the different choices you're making, choosing to make choices from your new, you know, kind of the new thought system that is currently integrating. Mm-hmm. and. Stepping away from making decisions from the old ones. And one of the thing that, the best and simplest ways that I've ever, that just kind of came to me, that I've heard it described as maybe not as, I don't even know if they were necessarily talking about embodiment, but that's what it is, um, was at our, when I first like got my coaching certification, , and I remember one of the women who started that program, she was like, the point of coaching is really to help your clients get to a place.
Like you somehow would just become different without realizing, like, you just wake up one day and you're different and you're like, oh my God, how did I even get here? But yet, I'm, I'm this person and I'm making. And I just am experiencing all of all of these things differently and you kind of forget the whole process of getting to that point because now it's just who you are.
It's been fully integrated. Yeah. And then you are just the living embodiment of the all of this work that you've done, all of this inner work.
Yes. And. It's funny, this conversation has come up quite a bit this week with my clients and with my own mentor that nothing has often changed yet. Everything has changed.
And the way, and you just said this too, the way in which I think you said the, that we experience, the world has shifted. Like you wake up in your different things are just different, but a lot of times your outside world isn't all that different. Right like this. Like sure people are gonna come in and out as you heal.
Um, you know, and you vibrate differently. You know, like lower frequency people that you're just no longer and nothing's wrong with them, but you just might not vibe with them anymore. That stuff might change, but a lot of times, It's not these grandiose, huge life changes either. When you become a, like this new embodiment, this new version, this new, I've just, everything feels different.
I feel different. Mm-hmm. .
Yeah. Yeah. It's like, I think, I think the way you can describe it too is when the same kind of life things happen to you and you respond differently and they don't get to you as deeply, or you can let them sort of roll off or just. Be like the day ender that maybe they would've been previously
the day ender.
Yeah. I know for me, I would get so involved in my emotional waves, you know, in a human design. I'm a Manny Jen emotional authority, and I read the world and experience the world deeply through my emotional self.
Learning to embody, embody my emotions in an emotionally intelligent way has been the greatest gift I can give myself because I no longer respond from my emotional self, but I absolutely let all of that move through me. I don't stifle it, repress it, suppress it at all, but I still respond to. , you know, my toxic ex in a different way than I did when I was with them.
Mm-hmm. . Right? The response levels are more grounded. I understand. I have this deeper self-awareness of, oh, I'm, and I'll even tell you days, like I know I'm in an emotional wave. Mm-hmm. , I'm in a low right now, and today's not a day to make decisions. , today's not a day to make decisions in a low or a high
Yeah. But that is, I am the living embodiment of the work, right? Mm-hmm. and. . So, so many of my tools the last few years have been, and I would even say really the last year and a half, two years deeply have been the, the actual moving of my body in a different way. Mm-hmm. than just working out and not to minimize working out because I've mm-hmm.
love it. I will always do it, I've always done it, I've always been active. Um, for me, but dropping into it in a more feminine way, using embodiment tools to become embodied. Mm-hmm. . Yeah.
Yeah. And even with that, it's like thinking about working out versus movement and actually like instead of working out for a body goal, which again, nothing against having goals about how you wanna look, feel all of those things, but it's like thinking about all of your, like almost in a medi, like in a meditative.
Picturing all of your muscles, all of your cells, all of like the oxygen going to your muscles, all of these things happening for you, and being able to like be in gratitude and appreciation for your body, working in all the ways that it's working for you and thinking about it on a, like you're saying, kind of like in a more feminine flow way than just.
The, the more masculine of like, let's get it done. Let's get this thing done for the day so that I can like check it off my list or so that it can be this, this goal. Um, goal met. Yeah.
And this, and, and simply embodiment is being in your body. . Yeah. I mean, like that's also, it's just also being present.
Mm-hmm. . And I love, like what you said, like present to what your cells are doing and the muscles and like we take for granted every single one of us humans. Mm-hmm. , that breath will bring you back into your body. We're always doing it. It's an available miracle right here. Inhale. Exhale. Because we don't know when we're gonna be taking our last one.
Mm-hmm. . So there's you. . I think in the feminine world and in the spiritual world and even new GY world, there's a lot of embodiment work that we get to do. And then we become embodied in this new version. And also quite simply, we're just in our body. Mm-hmm. and we're here. Mm-hmm. having this human journey.
Yeah. And there was, um, and I'm gonna segue a little bit because I, it keeps coming to me. When we were in our mastermind together mm-hmm. , um, I remember you had, we were talking about like, I don't know. Just we were going through, so I can't remember what it was. But specifically I remember you saying I had to drop in.
to my body and to my womb and to Myoni, and I had to ask, what do we need? Mm-hmm. . And I remember you saying like, I put my hands on my hips and basically you, you just, and I think you needed like to not wear underwear, like not wear panties and just be in a t-shirt. Yeah. Do you remember what I'm talking
about?
Yeah. It's because, yes. The specific background story with this, sorry. Cause don't About you . No, no. It's literally because I remember being, I was in the UK. and I had only packed, we thought we were only gonna be there for like three weeks. We ended up being there for six months. I didn't have a lot of clothing packed with me, and there was nothing, like, everything that I had was so, um, I don't wanna say stifling, but like compressive.
You know, it's like I had like leggings and things that were comfortable, like comfortable pants, but there was nothing that made me like, I just was. Feeling the call to, like, I need to have something loose and flowing and have like a robe where I can just like wear a robe and nothing under, like nothing underneath it.
Or even shorts, like something that like allowed some air to flow through. Mm-hmm. because I felt so like, just stifled and like held in and, and that was when I was. , I think I just need to sit here with like no pants on and no underwear and just like, let everything breathe. Like I need to, like let it all
breathe.
Yes. And that's such, that's so beautiful for what you, you, your soul. Mm-hmm. in your body needed in that moment and not Right. Like that. I know for me, old me would've been like, oh, made some, made something of that, you know? Right, right. Versus just letting it be Okay. because I know in my own embodiment practices, I make crazy faces.
I do things that I would've, my old self would've been like, you're weird. Mm-hmm. , get it together. But it's really dropping out of that head, which you did, and into like, what do I
actually need right now? Yeah. Like, what do you need from me right now? What does my body need? What do, what do I want it to feel like?
And I just wanted to feel free. Like honestly, that's what it was. Like the clothing felt so constricting. That's the word I've been looking for. It felt like I just felt constricted in not only the clothing, but just that time of year. It just felt like there was very little light. It was cold. I just like wanted to feel free and light and open.
Mm-hmm. And just doing something as simple as like laying on the bed or walking around with like no pants on. It felt very, just felt so open and freeing. Yeah. And. , and I think this is where, like you're saying, a lot of these things can feel like when you live in the world, that tells you that you need to do certain things and wear certain things and be a certain way and be polite and like a specific version of yourself in the public world.
Then you can look at some of these practices and. . Well, that seems a little bit odd, like why did you need to do that? And I think a big part of embodiment is the radical acceptance piece of just like taking all of the judgment, suspending your judgment, suspending your beliefs, and disbeliefs about what is available.
And just simply like you're saying, being in your body, tuning in, asking yourself. , what is it that I actually need right now in this moment? And then letting yourself have it, letting yourself do it, whatever it is, even if it feels weird or crazy, or like, why would this even help me? Yeah. And just letting yourself do it and experience that.
I think that's one of the biggest steps and. and it's like you're saying like, like with breath, it's something that's always available to us but is And is so simple, but is also so powerful.
Yes. Yeah. Simple is often powerful. Not always easy. Mm-hmm. for sure. It is not easy to remember to come back to our breath.
Mm-hmm. , it's not easy to drop out of the head and it's the body, but it is simple. Mm-hmm. and I know for me, I reach a resistance with it. I, I know how much, first of all, I believe in the wisdom of our bodies. Mm-hmm. , I believe our bodies, our vessels are extremely wise in and of themselves, and we get to experience that.
by being souls in this vessel or however you wanna picture it. Um, but many times I don't. I am called to do embodiment work, meaning turning on some music, whether I need to honor my sacred rage, or I just need to move because our emotions are always flowing. Mm-hmm. , whether you're an emotional or an unemotional, we experience the world through our feelings and our sensations, and they get.
They just do mm-hmm. . And so I will often experience resistance to getting up, turning the music on and moving my body. Mm-hmm. whether it needs to be more aggressive in a, in, in the sacred rage or more soft and flowy and feminine to honor maybe some sadness or even some just peace and calm. And I use that to not only move the energy through, but then to invite in.
what it is I desire to feel. So if I'm feeling sacred rage or I'm feeling frustration that something isn't occurring, can I move that? And then can I gently move my body into the feelings of what it would feel like to receive that? Mm-hmm. . And because the other side of it feels so liberating and good, and I feel lighter.
I will experience resistance before I even enter into of like, I don't need to do that. I don't have time to do that. There's no space for that. I've got this, this, and this to do. I'm fine. It's not gonna make a difference. Mm-hmm. , so part of this work too is to really watch that self-talk that we're gonna, we've talked about this before, but how sneaky we are.
Mm-hmm. and talking ourself or talking ourselves out of what we most need.
Mm-hmm. . Yes. And honoring the things that we most. Yeah. And like, and letting, letting them be, be a need, like letting ourself even have needs in the first place. ,
that's, yeah. Yeah. That needs to be echoed.
Yeah. Yes. Because I mean, gosh, I mean, even as women, especially as women, just even admitting that you have needs can feel like the scariest thing in the world.
Yes. Cause God forbid, . We need something from somebody when we're not just the one giving, giving, giving all the time and, and the
saying yes to yourself. I had a girlfriend yesterday who is in constant hustle mode and going mm-hmm. and saying yes to everybody and, but in a more of like fierce energy, but also there's just this.
She makes it mean, and I love her, but she makes it mean something bad if she's not always doing what she's supposed to be doing. Mm-hmm. . And we had a mom, like, long story short, we had a mom's meeting for school last night and she really didn't wanna go. And I kept encouraging her, don't go then. Yeah. Why don't, what if you stayed home and you, let me give you the notes.
Mm-hmm. , we were there last year and she. I was like, I think I'm gonna do it. And she did and she felt so good and she kept texting me like, thank you so much. For encouraging me to say yes to myself. Mm-hmm. and like, yes. Because we're not doing anybody any favors if we show up in the energy of, of, of really not wanting to fucking do something and forcing ourselves to do it, because we already have enough of that in life.
Mm-hmm. . So if we can say no to something and yes to ourselves, now she's going to be more embodied. Mm-hmm. in giving herself permission to give to her
first. Exactly. Yeah. Exactly. And. . It's like giving voice, giving voice to those needs in the first place, like what she was doing and you encouraging her because it, it's hard to do that in the beginning and it's something that takes practice to be able to, you know, it's because you can feel yourself not wanting to do these certain things, but then that's when the stories start.
The sneaky things like. . If I don't go, then like maybe somebody will think this about me. Or if I don't go, then like that means that I'm not as involved as, um, or that I'm a bad mother. Like God forbid, like, oh, in this case go to the, go to the number one like nuclear option . Yeah. You know, bad mother. Yes.
Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah, I mean, that's why, like you're saying, it's so important to, it's so important to be able to just bring those. gently bring those out and mm-hmm. and let them be. Okay. And that's, I think where the, the acceptance comes in. That it's, it's okay to have needs. It's okay to, and it's necessary to let them come out, let them be heard, and then choose to honor them.
Yeah. And your needs get to be your desires too. Yeah. You know, like, yes, we, it's easier to give ourselves. Or start. Start at the point where we give ourselves the primal needs, right? Like, okay, I need more rest, or I need to sleep in, or I need to take a bath, or I need to take a hot, hotter shower. I need to make sure I sit down and eat.
Mm-hmm. . But then what about the desires of a massage? Mm-hmm. or a girl's night or dinner with your, you know, like moving into. That those get to be needs as well, but maybe in a different way. And that you get to say yes to that as well. And we, we know, you and I know, and those many, I mean many people know, but as you do this embodiment work, this is what helps you change your belief system.
Mm-hmm. , this is what helps you change who you're being. And then one day you wake up, Embodi. in it's integrated. You're no longer going from the knowing to the digesting. Yeah. You've digested that is who you are and you cannot, that feeling is
priceless. Yes. Because every day you're making choices that are for your good versus for everybody else's expectations of who they think you should be.
And the more you practice that, the more you experience what life gets to be. because of these new choices that you're making. Then it just C builds and compounds over time. And then you wake up and you're like literally a whole new person. And whole new person. Yeah. And life maybe hasn't changed, but you've changed.
And now life is magical because my gosh, you get to experience it in a whole new way. it is. You have a
new, a new higher perspective and not higher is better, but higher is feeling better. Mm-hmm. and life really is magic. That is something that mm-hmm. I fully believe in, and I fully allow in all the ways in which God universe, source gets to delight me and I stay open to being delighted.
And it might be something as simple as, I caught the sunset the other day on the way home from the beach. It might be something as simple as a butterfly. Or a dragonfly flying by. Yeah. But you really delight and you're present in your body in these moments. And the other thing I would like to add is that y'all, it is hard work.
Mm-hmm. it. It's hard work. Like we're not gonna, s Abby and I are not gonna be two people that sit here and be like, oh, life becomes magic. And you just get to do a couple flittery things here and journal and meditate and then, oh my God. It's amazing. Like you actually have to put in work in your belief system in who you're being.
Mm-hmm. , stay present. , but the liberation and the lightness on the other side of this type of hard work versus the hustle showing up to, mm-hmm. all the things you think you need to, that is a different type of hard work not serving you. This is the hard work, the inner work, the soul work. I can tell you need to talk.
You have something coming through.
No, no. The thing that, there's something that's been wanting to come through this whole time and it's really just a funny. It's kind of like a funny anecdote that I wanted to say because it really goes well with this. Which have you watched? There's this show on Hulu called Maggie.
Yeah. And it's about this woman who is a psychic and how she basically is, um, I don't know, she sees the future with this one guy sees herself like marrying him, and then it's, she gets different pieces of the vision every time, so she's always confused about like which way, how to move forward and blah, blah, blah.
But her best friend. The best friend character. Um, they're going through some old books and it's some self-help, you know, personal growth book, and she's like, Man, I really just, I really love like the old self health books where it just tells you to like, change your personality. Now it's just telling me like to honor myself and they're like, what does that even mean?
And I was like, and then it's like, oh God, how often do I say this? Am I becoming a cliche? But , it's ok. But it's so true. Like it's not. Just changing your personality and becoming different. It's about looking at all of the pieces, all of the parts, and letting them all let in all of the needs and all of the desires that live within you and letting them all be seen and be witnessed and choosing them and letting them all be okay.
Letting them lead you to what you actually want to be, want to experience. Yeah, and my, and that shit. ain't for the faint of heart .
It's showing gosh it's not. Um, yeah. And then my favorite saying that came through one day is Leave none of you behind. Mm-hmm. , it's taking all of you with you. But that doesn't mean bringing all the heavy luggage and baggage that isn't serving you as being present to all that you are in this moment and what's coming up and how you feel.
And I the honoring yourself. I had a client, Anna once, and she was like, fall. I don't get the honoring yourself. Can we just say respecting like, respect works for me. Mm-hmm. , and I was like, yeah, we can use whatever terminology is gonna resonate. And so with her, I would be like, this is, you know, respecting your emotions.
Mm-hmm. respecting what's coming up right now. Respecting. You know, the, the bo the body and, and what it needs mm-hmm. and it may not be another CrossFit workout, you know? Mm-hmm. and, cause I come from a CrossFit background, it might be some yin yoga where you sit in a long pose and mm-hmm. , see who you are and become one with that and release those emotions.
So, yeah. Mm-hmm. , we had to, we have to often shift words so that they work for us. Mm-hmm. . And so honoring is, it's a form of respect for yourself. I like
that respect. I think that would definitely land with a lot of people. . Mm-hmm. , because honoring can feel, it can feel kind of like, I don't know, just, um, la la la.
Like, Ooh, I'm gonna honor myself today and do
something floaty. Yeah. Or princessy or, yeah. Yeah. It might not always land with everybody. Yeah. Mm-hmm. .
But yeah, if you can respect yourself, if you can respect your needs and your desires that are coming up and your emotions, and let them all be okay, like that's exactly.
Yeah, exactly it and
respect where you came from and what the, how your old belief system got you to where you are now. Mm-hmm. . And then also it is no longer working now, so we say it's not serving you. Mm-hmm. meaning it's just not working anymore. It's not working for you now. It, it did great that, that, that operating.
Yeah, it's like that train got you to the station and now you get to take this other train to get to the next station and that's cool. Can you can hop off and hop on something else? Yeah.
And this next train is going to feel less in survival. It's going to feel more in belief of yourself, respect for yourself, love for yourself, more full of vision of where you're going.
You know, like this train is decorated so differently and feels differently than it's air
conditioning. Oh my gosh. It's gonna have comier seats. It's gonna have a better view. It's gonna have a, it's gonna be a smoother ride. A butler like flying off the tracks. . No. Yeah,
right. The old one's flying off the tracks.
Just trying to get you there. . Yeah. This one's got the butler. This train. This
train is gonna have premium meals
of whatever you. Yes. Like this is the new belief system that you're creating by getting off the old, the old train
flying. You might even have a private car, like we don't know. We don't know.
Whatever you want, whatever.
You can have chandeliers on this train. You can have a, what is it? The panoramic sunroof on this train. Yeah,
that's, that's awesome. I wanna go on this train. I do too.
Oh, what a journey.
to go along with the train theme.
Yes. What a journey. What a journey. I didn't even mean to do that. Oh, is there anything else we wanna give them about embodiment and integration of who they're becoming and being. And
I think just the practical advice or the practical, um, nudge to as always start listening and paying attention.
to the things that are coming up, the little voices telling you what you might need or what might be different or what might really feel good. Oh. Or what on the converse, what might really feel like shit that you don't wanna do. . Yeah. And let yourself admit that and then not do it. Yes. Or choose something different.
Choose something that feels better. Yes. And
I'm always of discernment. is this resistance, the type of resistance that is going to serve me. So I need to do it any, like, I, I know I feel, and like this is something, there's something on the other side of this. I need to do this or this genuinely feels like shit.
Mm-hmm. like my friend going to this mom's meeting. Mm-hmm. , I don't wanna fucking do it. Mm-hmm. and then don't do it. Right. But being really honest in your body, uh, because that we can use it as a scapegoat, but that, and I would say too, When you are integrating all of your work, it is not uncommon to get really tired.
Mm-hmm. it. It is not uncommon to need a lot of rest, drink a lot of water. Like just the, like you said, the practical stuff too. Mm-hmm. of really taking care of yourself and if you're tired, rest because we integrate a lot when we sleep. Yeah. Or when we have that downtime or that unplugged time where it's mindless and you're watching a show that just feels.
Yes. I mean, you're so good. Like Abby has a plethora of Hulu shows she can give you that are easy watches mm-hmm. that like, feel so good to just move through a couple seasons. Mm-hmm. like, what was the one you gave me? Type The bowl type? Yeah,
the bowl type. Yeah. Yeah. So go ahead. I, no, I was just gonna say like you mentioned, you're a, a mangen.
I am a, I am a projector, so we need, this girl needs a lot of rest. . Yes. So, yeah, I love finding the shows, just like you're saying during integration, during these things, and finding, finding, um, like that's actually a good example with shows. Like, there are certain shows for me, like I told you about euphoria.
Like, why? I just, I'm like, no, I'm not gonna watch it. That feels intense. Yeah. That feels like something is gonna really activate my nervous system. It does. Yes it does. and. Even if it's really good, I'm like, no, I don't really wanna have that experience, and so I just choose not to. Yes. And just reminding everybody, all of the listeners, that you get to do that and you don't have to make an excuse or you know, like to other people.
Um, like another thing too that people will always, they'll my friends will make fun of me for is if I rewatch a show or if I'm watching a show for the first time. And there's like a storyline that doesn't ex, that doesn't excite me. I just fast forward through those storylines and I just watch the ones that I like.
Okay. Because I'm like, this is my time and I get to spend my time how I want. I get to experience the parts of it that I want, and yes, and I don't, and who cares? It's my life. , I get
to choose. Well, and that's such a testament to how we can try to follow the rules, even when we're trying to relax and rest and, and just let ourselves be.
Mm-hmm. , there's, so we make rules around like, you should watch the whole show. And it's like a, you're letting your little inner rubble out. Maybe. Like, no, I don't actually have to watch the whole show.
I don't care about this storyline. Moving on best forward, this is the beautiful thing about being able to binge shows.
And this is for me, this is my time, this is my my time. Yes. I love it. I love it. One of my go-to shows, since we were just talking about it, is New Girl. I just can watch it. I'll
have New Girl. It's my
go-to for years
now. Never fast forwarding for any of
those storylines. I don't either. Yeah, you laugh,
you just mm-hmm.
Yeah, it's, you feel lighter. Yeah. should
always do another episode on all the shows. We like all the shows. We're like, these
are all my top recommendations for shows. That'll make you feel good. Yes. And won't, you know, it's a, it's the easy, the easy watching show that will just really brighten your day. .
Yes.
When you are needing a break from the inner work and from life and all of that. Yes. Yes,
exactly.
Well follow Abby and I. Yes. Instagram, Facebook, Fallon, j Fallon Double underscore. Dan Instagram. What is yours? Abby? At home and mine is just my
name at Abby Handball. Okay. I couldn't remember not to be confused with the bot account that has three L's versus two
That one is fake. It's still, is it still up? It's still up. Oh my goodness.
Who knows. Get on that. I know. Yeah. Not not the bot account. Yeah. But share with us your favorite or like embodiment tools or work, or even when you have first woken up to this new version of you and realizing what that felt like and what that was like for you, being embodied in all the work that you've done.
And, and if you're on the road to embodiment, how we can support you and or share stories. And
we'd love to hear all of it and let us know how you. Choosing yourself today and respecting your needs and your desires, and let us know because we love to hear it. 📍 We do Tag us both
and we love you. We love you next week.
See you next week. .