The Hidden Cost of Always Being “On” as a Law Firm Owner

Watch the YouTube version of this episode HERE

Are you a law firm owner looking to learn more about how to be a good leader? In this solo episode of the Guild Live Show, Tyson reflects on work-life balance, leadership, and the guilt many law firm owners feel about stepping away from the office. Sharing his own experiences, Tyson explores the psychological challenges of letting go, the importance of trusting your team, and why true leadership is measured by outcomes and freedom.

Tyson shares some insights on feelings of guilt law firm owners have when being away from the office. A lot of firm owners tend to tie their value to their presence, which is where this guilt can stem from. There can be thoughts of things going wrong in the office or fires not being put out. To move away from this mindset, it is important to ensure you can trust your team to handle things while you are away. Whether it's delegating work to specific people or asking for updates on a recurring basis, these things can help you feel more at ease and allow that guilt to disappear.

Tyson talks about visible versus meaningful effort. For leaders, being present in the office doing things does not mean anything unless you are working on the right things. You have to show up and work with intention to ensure your firm is successful. If you know there are improvements that need to be made, show up and outline steps to get that done. This shows you are serious about making sure your firm grows and succeeds.

Take a listen to learn more!

• 4:00 The Guilt of Being Away
• 6:52 The Danger of Identity Tied to Work
• 11:07 Visible vs. Meaningful Effort
• 14:42 Trusting Your Team and Letting Go
• 18:33 Leadership Is About Outcomes
• 19:25 Freedom as a Metric for Success

 Tune in to today’s episode and checkout the full show notes here. 

Creators and Guests

Host

Tyson Mutrux

Tyson is the founder of Mutrux Firm Injury Lawyers and the co-founder of Maximum Lawyer.

What is Maximum Lawyer?

Maximum Lawyer is the podcast for law firm owners who want to scale with intention and build a business that works for their life.

Hosted by Tyson Mutrux, each weekly episode features candid conversations with law firm owners, business experts, and industry leaders sharing real strategies and lessons learned in the trenches.

If you're ready to grow your firm with less stress and more support, this is your next must listen. Subscribe today.

Tyson Mutrux 00:00:13 Good morning, and welcome back to the Guild live show. Different schedule this week. we had Christmas on Thursday, so hopefully everyone had a wonderful Christmas. we are live in the guild. If you're listening to this as a recording, you're probably going to hear this after New Year. So happy New Year to you. If you had a great Christmas and Happy New Year. for those of you that are in the guild that are listening to this live, hopefully you have a wonderful new year. We are off next week. I'm going to be in Disney with the fam, so I'll be taking some more time off, which is fantastic. That's always great. which is actually somewhat of the topic of the show this week. so it's interesting this it's been sitting with me for a little bit and I wanted to talk about it because I think it's something that most of you will probably relate to.

Tyson Mutrux 00:01:07 maybe more than you might expect, but so lately, I've been spending a lot less time in the office, and it's it's not some sort of like, hey, I cracked the code here. Like, here's how I work. Fewer hours a week. This is it's not that type of an episode. this is more like that. Sort of like that real life thing, you know, sort of uncomfortable, you know, being out of the office, uncomfortable feeling. And it's it's one of those things where I think that many people have probably been through something very similar. so this isn't like something where, like, I've been out of the office and like, you know, been depressed or something. It's nothing like that. So we are we are renovating our bathroom. Okay. And when I say renovating, we are like, we stripped everything down to the studs. So I'm. And I'm not talking about just painting a wall or anything like that. We we have ripped the shower out. We ripped the bathtub, toilet, vanity.

Tyson Mutrux 00:02:10 I'm everything. We're doing a complete re hall of our bathroom. and so I've been I've actually been personally, you know, away from the office. I mean, I'm coming into the office every single day, but I'm working less hours. I'm, I'm I'm actually spending a lot of time on that. And it's funny because I'm sure I know I hear some of you saying, you know who? Not how kind of a thing. I, I'm not doing this because I have to I'm not doing this because it's cheaper. so Amy and I, we're doing this. I mean, I really enjoy it. I like building things. I like working with my hands. I like seeing the progress from really start to finish. It's no different than whenever I'm building things with the firm. Like, I like to build things. That's what I like to do. So this is a hobby. Okay, so those of you some of you like to go golfing. Some of you like to play, pickleball.

Tyson Mutrux 00:03:08 Some of you like to knit. You know, I like to build things. That's what I like to do. just happens to be that this habit is a little bit more or hobby. This is a little bit more expensive when it comes to, bathroom renovation, but and it does takes, you know, quite a bit of time. However, it's something that I get to do with Amy, and it's something that the kids have helped out a little bit with. Not a lot, but a little bit, part of it, but I, I really enjoy it or like it. it's but here's the weird part of it, and I don't know if it's weird, but the part that I've struggled with a little bit, it's that, like, even though everything at the firm has been running really well, our profit is way up. Okay. I'm not not to brag. I'm just like, we're in a good spot. Like, I really it's one of those things where I really started feeling guilty.

Tyson Mutrux 00:04:00 Like being away. Like. Like real guilt. You know what I mean? Like, man, should I. Should I be at the office right now? Kind of a thing. And, you know, I'd be sort of standing in the middle of this demolished bathroom with all these tools and sort of like the thought would creep in, like, maybe I should head to the office. You know, like, maybe I should do this, or maybe I should get my laptop out. Like, there's times where, like, I would be out my laptop. I had to actually have the laptop in, in the bathroom with me as I was working on something. but, like, there's nothing. Nothing's on fire, no emergencies. clients are being taken care of. The the the the team is doing their job. You know, revenues, great. Profits are great. And still, it's just interesting. Like, I felt like something just not. Not right. You know what I mean? and and so that's sort of what I want to unpack today.

Tyson Mutrux 00:05:01 That's that's what we're going to be talking about a little bit. And so I think that a lot of law firm owners, a lot of legal entrepreneurs, as Becca likes to call them, they tie their value to their presence. Right? So like, if I'm not in the office, am I really working? You know, if I'm not responding instantly to some sort of message, you know, like, am I being irresponsible? Like, all these questions go through our heads, you know? And, you know, if I'm not exhausted all the time, did I really earn what I have? I think that's a really big one. Like I've got a I've got to wear myself out and I, I am a true believer in working hard and and really, really getting at it. That's why like I've got a I'm like a I don't mess around when I go to the office, I get there, I do my job and I leave. That's why I, you know, I get to leave whenever I do.

Tyson Mutrux 00:05:51 It's like I'm a firm believer. I don't. I mean, this is gonna sound kind of bad. I don't like to, like, sit around, chit chat. I don't like to do all that. I like to just, boom, do the work. but I think thinking the way, like, you know, we're, like, tying your presence to your value is really. I think it's a dangerous mindset to have. and so there is a, there's a Seneca quote I kind of keep coming back to. It's like we suffer more often in imagination than in reality. And I think that that's where a lot of my guilt has come from. This week is where I am. I've been like, oh, like what? Like like all these scenarios going off in my head. and so and I think that, that, that kind of hit me hard a little bit. I mean, because really, nothing bad was actually happening. Actually happening. The suffering was entirely in my head.

Tyson Mutrux 00:06:52 That was entirely in my head. Right. Like nothing was going wrong. And that part is the struggle part. And there are several. It's one of the things where I went into like a sort of a rabbit hole. With this a little bit I looked into, I was like, oh, what are some. There's like studies on this and like, what are the statistics and all that. And so there are, there's lots of studies on founders and business owners. that and one of the major trends that shows up is that, it's it's not really delegation. It's one of the big, big things. It's like identity. And we tie up our identity so much into our presence, being at the office or being a trial lawyer. Like like your that's your like, identity. You know, we've sort of spent years being the hero like the we're the firefighter and like so kind of transition not not everybody's a trial attorney like so you're like you're you're the firefighter at the office. Like you're the problem solver.

Tyson Mutrux 00:07:54 You're you're the one that does all the things. And like, like I kind of joked for years. Like, unlike the IT guy, where people come to me like, not anymore because I got cash. But like for years it was like, I'm the I'm the IT guy where people came to me for tech issues. and when those roles disappear as you grow, that's one of those things, like one of those roles that disappeared for me. We don't we don't usually immediately replace them with something that's healthier. And what happens is instead, guilt starts to fill in that gap. Where what do I do now? What am I going to do? I don't do that anymore. So what happens now? So it's interesting. so another thing that surprised me was working on the bathroom is, like, sad. It's it's satisfying in a way that running a business sometimes isn't. It's really kind of interesting. It really it fills that, that void and that bothered. It bothered me a little bit.

Tyson Mutrux 00:09:03 It. If I'm being completely honest, it really kind of bothered me. Then I was like enjoying it. Almost like I was enjoying it too much. You know what I mean? Like I was like, I really like doing this. Is this is this right? Is this like it felt wrong? It's one of the things that just felt wrong. because, like, if you think, like, logically, logically, the firm is more important than the bathroom. Okay. It really is. Okay. Completely. I would make more money. Right. I could I could pay someone to do the bathroom. Although Jesus, the the I'm sure some of the quotes I've heard other people in our neighborhood get. Whoa! Holy crap. But, I, I would probably make more money if I was working at the office. Right? the firm by itself is obviously worth way more than a bathroom. but psychologically, the the bathroom wins every time. It's the Army building working on the bathroom once every time.

Tyson Mutrux 00:10:04 and I think the reason is that the the progress, it's visible. I can see it. I can see it in progress. I can see in real time when I'm behind on something, or I can see in real time that I'm ahead on something. you know, you put up the framing, you see the framing, you put up the drywall, you see the drywall, in the shower. It's not drywall you put up, you know, go board or backer board or Schluter board. Lots of, you know, those are all things that are like, waterproof. You know, you can put up, but, you know, you finish a day knowing exactly what's changed. You can see it okay. You can see it. And but buzz business doesn't really work like that. It it can to a certain extent with like dashboards and KPIs and all that, but you don't really see. You don't really see the full picture like you do when you're building something. And that's what's really kind of interesting.

Tyson Mutrux 00:11:07 Like you don't fully see that that, that that the big picture. And if you don't see it then the your, your employees don't probably see it either. And I think spending that's maybe one of the lessons I learned is like spending more time, like building big picture for the team. because, I mean, you can put in a week of leadership conversations, you know, system tweaks, some do some team coaching. and there's really, like, no immediate, like, after photo. There's just not, that payoff doesn't show up, you know, for months. It really doesn't. and it really kind of comes back to like the whole idea of, like, I talked like I talked about this in a recent episode. Like, like how ideas are really a commodity. And execution of those ideas is not like, that's a Michael Dell quote. Like, we're, you know, ideas are a commodity. The execution of them is not. and execution is by far the most important part of it.

Tyson Mutrux 00:12:08 Idea a dime a dozen. it's the physical execution. That's what gives you the brain instant feedback. running a firm is delayed gratification on hard mode. That's really what it is. and if you really don't understand that, that's a really core concept that you need to understand that if you don't understand that, you're going to you're going to mistake visible effort for meaningful effort. Okay. So when you're doing when you're in the middle of things, working on the firm, you have to understand just being there, doing the thing, being being, busy doesn't really mean anything unless you're working on the right things. you got to have that meaningful effort. So, sort of the mindset that changed. I had to force myself to change my mind on this. and I really it was more of like a, you know, instead of thinking, should I be working right now to really I it's more of a what was all that work for in the past, all those long hours that I put in, those late nights earlier in my career, like, I didn't put in late nights, weekends.

Tyson Mutrux 00:13:33 And that years of stress, to be honest with you, just to stay stuck in the same grind forever, I didn't I know you didn't either. I put it on those long hours, really? As a down payment. they were supposed to buy freedom later. That freedom that I'm sort of taking advantage of now. Okay. It's. It was the the, the the preparation that I had early on was not accidental. Okay. It was intentional. and in the time that I'm taking off now, I had to I had to convince myself of this is one of the things where, like, I had to convince myself that time that I'm taking off right now to do these things, that I'm enjoying doing it, that that's earned time. And I think that that's where a lot of law firm owners have gotten it wrong for so long that they they try they treat those early sacrifices like it's a permanent identity and sort of a instead of a temporary phase where they think that my whole career is going to be like this.

Tyson Mutrux 00:14:42 we all know those burned out lawyers. We all know them, right? Where they have spent decades. They're in their like third or fourth decade. And they are just a just a stressed out ball and they're just a mess. But they really struggle. The struggle becomes who they are and not what they did. Not they what? Not the what, not what they went through earlier in their career. I can't remember. Like, struggle isn't the goal here. Like leverages. Right? We're going through some of these hard times to then get leverage later on. It's what we're doing. A big part of this, though, is trusting the team you built. Okay. the the uncomfortable question they're going to have to ask yourself at some point. if everything is going well, why don't I trust that it will continue without me watching it? Okay. That that's that's not a team problem. That's more of a leadership problem. Okay. The the I'm going to repeat that part is really important. That's not a team problem.

Tyson Mutrux 00:15:53 That's a leadership problem. The team is not the problem. You. You have to trust them more. Okay. You have to. Control issues masquerade as responsibility all the time. They really do. that's a control issue. You have to be able to delegate. And there's there are numerous studies on this about like, if you can give your team instead of micromanaging them, you give them that the effort you above 20%, increases in profitability. Like it's it's a massive increase in profitability whenever you take that stranglehold off, and if your absence if it causes anxiety, it usually means one of two things. Either your systems are not fully complete or they're wrong or your trust isn't in your team. And those are very different problems. Those are those are things that either you need to work on your systems, or you need to work on your team, or maybe a combination of both. They're very different issues, but it's usually one of those two things. So the what we really have to get to so kind of start to wrap things up a little bit, is we have to redefine what work actually means.

Tyson Mutrux 00:17:12 Okay. And that's a big reframe. and that's, it's it's helping me. Helping me. Not completely helped me, but it's helping me let go of some of that guilt. Working less doesn't mean that you care less. Okay. It often means that you've built something better. Okay. Remember that. So working less doesn't mean you care less. It does not mean that. It often means that you have built something better. And receiving that. Understanding that owning that. Hey, I'm. I'm in a good spot is really, really important. It's one of maybe my biggest struggles is is sort of understanding that part of it is kind of like the end of the go giver, like the fifth step in the go giver. Sort of like receiving understanding. that that's that's really important. so just remember, like, leadership isn't about location. It's about the outcomes. It really is. and this is something I think the legal industry is still catching up on. I think back at, about my, my, my first boss out of law school, how he, he really cared way more about us being in the office than so like that FaceTime then really what we did.

Tyson Mutrux 00:18:33 It was. It was so, so silly. So crazy. and and I think as a legal industry, we gotta let go of that. The, the presents being them being in the office, you being in the office, it's far less important than the actual the outcomes that you get. So if you're, it's, if you if you like the office, you know, and Michael Scott is talking to Jan and who is his manager? And he he's talking about. he said something like, you know, they do more work whenever I'm away. And she said he's like, no, no, they do more work when I'm here. And he's like, no, no, no. Because either way, it didn't sound right. Right. It shouldn't matter whether you're there or not. That's the reality. It should not matter whether you're there or you're away. If they're doing more work because you're there, that's a problem. If you're doing more work because you're away, that's a problem. it's a that's a better problem, though.

Tyson Mutrux 00:19:25 It's one of those things. It just means that you're the distraction. You you should, your team should be able to run on its own. That's the point. That's the point. and with that freedom that you have in your way. it's not a reward you should feel guilty about. Not at all. Freedom is kind of the metric. Freedom should be the metric. How much time can you take away? It's a pretty. When you start thinking of it that way, it's like, oh, that's a that's a nice metric to live by. It really is. Well, how about that for a KPI? Having having more freedom. It's pretty good. So here's sort of what I want to leave you with. If you're feeling guilty for stepping away. Pause before you beat yourself up and ask yourself, is anything actually broken? Did I build this firm to escape burnout or to live in it forever? what would need to change for me to step away for 30 days without stress? That's a really good question.

Tyson Mutrux 00:20:33 Where you will really help you identify all those gaps. Guilt doesn't always mean you're doing something wrong. Remember that it really doesn't. Sometimes it means you're you've outgrown the version of yourself that had to struggle to survive. And that's not failure. That's progress. So, that's all I have today. I appreciate you listening. Like I said, hopefully you had a wonderful Christmas. hopefully. Have a wonderful New Year. For those of you in the guild, hopefully those of you that, are listening to this after the New year. Hopefully. we had a wonderful new year. Hopefully your 2026 is your best year yet. Keep crushing it. remember to check out Becca's list where you can check out vendors that will help you see who's good, who's bad, who's in between, who's who's expensive, who's not expensive. the best vendors for you. Then if you're interested in the guild, go to Maxwell Guild. and we would love to have you and those of you that are going to be in Scottsdale in January or February.

Tyson Mutrux 00:21:42 I can't wait to see you then, but hopefully this one hit home for you. And if it did, I'd love to hear about it inside the Guild or wherever you're listening. So leave a comment and I'd love to hear from you. Have a wonderful 2026 everyone! We will be seeing you. See you buddy!