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A Christmas Special dedicated to helping people access healthy solutions to the dreaded Christmas blues. With love, light, breath work, gratitude, and solid actionable tips you can create a powerful shift in your mindset that will help you enjoy the holidays where you are, in your current circumstance and overcome some of the anxiety, fear, stress, expectations, past trauma, regret, loss, family dynamics, and overwhelm that often comes with the festivities. This is my little gift to you, Merry Christmas.
Welcome to Jessie's World - a weekly variety show that takes us through Jessie's Wheel of Life including Community, Fun, Health & Wellness, Entrepreneurship, Relationships, and Personal Development. Each segment brings a different flavor, making it interesting and engaging. The host Jessica Lambert aka @jessicavibez keeps it conversational and weaves humor though light and heavier topics. Special guests come from all walks of life and may surprise you. The ultimate goal of the show is to entertain, inspire, uplift, and assist us all (host included) in becoming our best selves. You get new, entertainment, wellness, and inspiration all in one great show.
Segments Include:
Tessy Time (Community) - real talks about current societal issues.
Mrs. Write (Fun) - a freestyle on-air comical writing segment where computer generated prompts are turned into master poems, songs, and short stories right on the spot.
Big Boss Vibez (Career Health) - let's talk all things entrepreneurship and bring our businesses to new heights
Today's Topic (and sometimes - Guest) - This segment covers a variety of topics that are aimed at peeking curiosity, inspiring, motivating, supporting, and most of all assisting listeners in becoming their best selves.
Gods N Goddesses (Health and Wellness) - travel inwards to center yourself. Let's focus on the personal care and wellness items that will help ensure you maximize your quality of life. A peer learning and sharing segment we grow together.
Love, Fam, N Family (Relationships) - let's share stories of human impact and the importance of leading with love.
Quote of the day.
Affirmation
Outro.
Listener interaction is encouraged. If you have show suggestions or would like to be a guest on our show you can send your request on Instagram @jessicavibez or @jessiesworldxo you may also visit www.platinumrouge.com/jessies-world
Jessie’s World Episode 23 - Mayday Mayday Merry Christmas
Introduction
Merry Christmas and welcome to the 23rd episode of Jessie’s World – where we unite to work on becoming the very best version of ourselves. I am your host Jessica Lambert aka JessicaVibez with a z.
Today we deviate from our regular programing for this very real Christmas special dedicated to healing hearts and soul around the world.
The format is a little different, Follow me and DM me on Instagram @Jessicavibez let me know if this episode spoke to you and if we should do an annual Christmas special.
Let’s begin with some gentle breath work, followed by gratitude healing, and then by a discussion around what they don’t tell you about Christmas, and how you can help heal your Christmas jitters.
BREATH WORK
GRATITUDE – reflecting on the year, what are you grateful for, who are you grateful for, what was your best moment this holiday season so far, it could be waking up, it could be the meal you ate, it could be a phone call from a loved one, an unexpected card whatever you are grateful for large or small I want you to think of it, say it, focus on it. Focus on the feeling that gratitude gives you. Dwell in the glow of thankfulness, of abundance, of safety, security, happiness. Let your worries go, let your expectations go, let your fears go, and just stay focused on what you are grateful for and the joy it brings you.
DISCUSSION – MAYDAY MAYDAY MERRY CHRISTMAS
“The jingle bells are jingling, the streets are white with snow, the happy crowds are mingling, but ther’s no one that I know – I’m sure that you’ll forgive me, if I don’t enthuse, I guess I’ve got the Christmas blues” Dean Martin – let’s talk about it!
I released my Christmas Book in honor of my grandma this year titled Awesome Audrey’s Kooky Christmas – it’s a really fun tale about Santa crashing into the hood, and the kids giving him a hard time. As a result Santa bans Christmas for all hoods, but Awesome Audrey saves the day with Christmas Cheer and unconditional love. It is a reflection of the love I felt from my grandmother growing up, the fun and joy in my neighborhood, and the festive vibes that we had long ago. It’s a beautiful thought and I am so honored that my son Illustrator Tredel Lambert designed the cover art which is so beautiful and magical. This is my holiday happy place, and sharing it with others means so much to me. All the photos and videos people send me with the book light up my day, and seeing people on my website platinumrouge.com buying the book and reading the e-book to their children and grandchildren is so special to me. One person even wrote me that Awesome Audrey is the best Grandma and that really warmed my heart because that is exactly how I feel and why I wrote the book.
Like me, many adults enjoy reminiscing about childhood Christmases that brought them joy, but for some, it highlights a loss. For my family, we lost our matriarch when my grandma passed in 2015. I choose to focus on the light and joy of her spirit, and not the fact that in reality Christmas is not the same without her, then again, no day is quiet the same without her.
We are humans, complex with battle wounds and hurt hearts, joy and pain, sunshine and rain.
The truth is that may experience stress, sadness, loneliness, isolation, depression, anxiety, regret and more during the holidays.
This episode is for anyone struggling to get through the season – I invite you to listen as many times as you need, and just know I love you, and you will be okay, you will get through this. If you think this episode will help others please share. Follow Jessicavibez on Instagram to stay abreast all our projects and episodes.
Now here is the conundrum, you can be both festive and happy, anxious and depressed.
So what are the causes of the Christmas blues?
Let’s take a closer look…
The expectations of others, the general commercialism of the season, the pressure to show love with money and gifts can cause Financial Anxiety and Stress – if you are unable to practically meet the expectations of others or your own desire to shower those you love with gifts, this can become very stressful. I grew up in a winter wonderland, and it was very rare that I received less than 30 gifts at Christmas time as a child – that was a child’s dream, but my grandma was a shroud financial planner, she really did buy gifts on sale all year around. She was intelligent and methodical. Me… not so much. I took on her spirit of giving, but in the last minute, and not always on sale. That can cause financial stress – and a dichotomy of feelings; you love to give, but you don’t love to pay for it lol.
Honestly, a lot of people stress about how to ‘make a good Christmas’ for their loved ones.
With social media ads constantly targeting you to shop it’s even harder because that is where we go to connect with the people we love and then we are bombarded with ads day in and day out.
Breath easy – there are ways to deal with this.
Choose your top 1, 2, or 3 people and shower THEM with gifts only – it’s a lot more affordable then trying to give everything to everyone you meet, and if you come from a large family like I do it’s really hard to try and do something for everyone.
Another great tip is to try and use WHITE ELEPHANT GAME when doing large family get together, this way everyone leaves with a gift and there is no onerous expectations attached to the true blessing of simply spending time together.
I don’t personally like to set a dollar limit, because White Elephant with family or close fam is your way to give a gift your style, and because everyone has different giving capacities and philosophies it really should be left up to the person giving – after all isn’t that the point of a gift, to give from your heart and not a set dollar rate. This leaves it open, it could be home made, store bought, expensive, inexpensive but heart felt, it adds a spiciness, joy, and authenticity to the game, you start to see people’s personalities in what they contribute – it’s cute, it’s great bonding, great fun, and most of all it reduces financial stress for everyone Try it and hit me up @JessicaVibez on Instagram let me know what you think.
Another great tip when it comes to the little ones in your life is to CREATE MEMORIES with them over just giving gifts. Something I saw a lot of this year is grand parents buying Awesome Audrey’s Kooky Christmas on e-book at platinumrouge.com and then reading with their grandchildren on zoom or facetime or Whatsapp or another video calling method. Sometimes they purchased 2 copies one to their child’s email and one to their own so their grandchildren could follow along. What a fantastic idea and a great way to spend time together over the holidays.
I know growing up going out and actually having fun in the snow was a great bonding opportunity too. Snow forts, snow men, snow angels. Also bring back caroling. Christmas movie night is one I always enjoy with my son. By stripping away these traditional holiday celebratory practices it’s like we are stripping the fiber off of food – it can become all processed and lack it’s intended substance.
The truth is, Christmas is about the birth of God’s son Jesus. It is about love, light and hope. It’s a spirit I tried to capture in my book Awesome Audrey’s Kooky Christmas too. It’s unconditional love.
If we consider the origins one may wonder why do people feel anxiety and stress during the holidays. Surely unconditional love, light, hope, and joy are great things to celebrate, surely God and his son Jesus are great to celebrate.
In reality, celebrating unconditional love can lead some to mourn loves they lost, have regrets about past trauma, or feel sad because they themselves do not feel the love they desire from others.
Feeling a lack of connection and love over the holidays can lead to a very depressing holiday experience.
Mourning lost loved ones can cut deep.
I understand how difficult that is - and I have some tips that have personally helped me.
Lost Loved Ones
As you know, my grandma raised me, and I love her dearly. She passed in 2015, and before she passed I promised her I would create this children’s story about her and share it with the world. So why did it take me from 2015 to 2022 to publish a children’s book – because I lost one of the most significant people in my life. I was mourning my grandmother hard, and while most just see me smile, I was battling random crying outbursts because I knew one of the only people who ever loved me unconditionally was now gone. I missed her. We all have people we miss. And I wrote that story shortly after she passed, but I wasn’t ready to share her with the world yet, my heart hurt too much. Then, through lots of personal development and work on self, I was able to heal to a point where not only did I want to share her story, I had a deep relentless desire to make sure everyone knew about Audrey Lambert aka Awesome Audrey and her amazing Christmas spirit and capacity to love.
By sharing her story, I feel healing. It is cathartic. When I have messages that are positive from the book, when people say they love Awesome Audrey my heart rejoices…this my friends is one way to deal with loss. Not everyone will write a book. But sharing fond memories with family. Incorporating that person’s memory into your holiday festivities. This year I gave my son one gift from Awesome Audrey instead of Santa. Even still, my nephew Mason who is only 2 now believes Awesome Audrey is Santa he receive the book in the mail and said Santa Santa – how wonderful.
There are ways that celebrating a memory can help heal the loss. Pay tribute and try to focus on the good times, try to give thanks that you had that person in your life – what a gift. Their memory is the gift that keeps giving…if you let it.
SELF LOVE
For some, this is a season of loneliness, isolation, and where perhaps you feel undercelebrated, unappreciated, even invisible.
Listen, I get it. Sometimes you give and give and no one gives to you. That can be so hard.
For this person I say, know WHY you give. I give to people I know will not give to me sometimes, and what I tell myself is to understand my WHY. If I just want to spread love, show a thought, show appreciation than that gift is from me to that person. In fact, gifts are not meant to be something that you give to receive one from someone else, they are simply meant to come from the heart and let’s face it, we do not hall have the same heart or capacity to love and to give.
Be grateful you are alive, you have love in your heart, you are able to give – what a blessing.
These are the ways you can use the power of your mind to shift perspective and create a truly magical holiday season – imagine that, your real gift is not under the tree, your real gift is in your mind
Likewise if you are alone for Christmas, if you feel you do not have many family or friends around – what a spectacular time to pour into yourself, love yourself, go shopping and gift yourself something a little special, and if you have a need to give, what a great time to volunteer or donate to local causes.
Love is free, it does not have to be monetary gifts. I have a family member I know I can not buy anything for as they have far more than I – but I still love this person so much, and I still want to give, so instead I try and gift acts of service, my unconditional and genuine love, my unwavering support – somethings are so precious they are priceless and perhaps in that way this person may be getting the best gifts of all from me.
The pandemic taught us that connecting virtually really does help as well. Also, let’s not forget to love our neighbor. Knocking on the neighbors door and saying merry Christmas, offering a token or a well wish is such a feel good thing to do.
Spread love, spread cheer, hold a door open, be courteous all of these are in line with the spirit of Christmas and please do pour into you no matter what.
EXPECTATIONS
While some feel isolated and alone, others can not get a minute to themselves. This is where good Christmas boundaries come into place.
When I was growing up my grandmother had an open door policy, anyone who came, anytime they came, they were accommodated. Sometimes she was more than happy for the company and happy to see an old friend or long lost family member. Other times, she was upset, something she would only show me. She felt pressured. She was just about to go to bed and here comes …fill in the blank… to ‘have a drink’ or ‘shoot the shit’ and she would put on an accommodating smile and never let on that she had a long day and was exhausted… I never understood it – until I grew up and found myself doing the same thing. All of a sudden I was my grandma, open door policy, no privacy, no good boundaries – a free for all. No thanks. I have come a long way since then.
I learned that my mental health, my wellness, my routine, the peace and integrity of my home all depends on my solid boundaries and most of the year I do great with putting my boundaries firmly in place, or at least better than I used to… until CHRISTMAS.
Christmas is a time where everyone wants you to drive everywhere and get together and boy isn’t that fun, and wonderful. Thank God you are loved. Thank God you are invited. Genuinely, sincerely, thank God.
However you also have to balance real life. You still have work, a home, a family – you still need personal time. You have to prioritize, and you have to be willing to say no if it truly doesn’t work for you …or at least, not now.
A great example is the storm we just had in Ontario Canada. We had a family day planned on the same day as the storm, 2 hours away from where I live. I was intending to drive there, then my uncle called me and said let’s call it and reschedule for after Christmas. I was so relieved. I wrote in our family group chat and everyone agreed. The storm came on schedule and boom a hyro line snapped right in front of my home. No power. Snow to my waist. 100 car pile ups in news… And me thinking when alone…would I have still driven there if we didn’t cancel.
Boundaries matter.
Sometimes you need to say NO today, so you can say YES to all the days ahead of it.
My friends.
You need not have a Mayday Christmas.
No alarms, no alerts, no anxiety, no stress …just love.
Love yourself.
Pour into you.
Choose your top 1, 2, 3 people and pour into them too.
Choose your other 7 if you have a large family and give a little connect a little.
Then wish everyone else well and live to enjoy another holiday season.
Celebrate your loved ones who passed and make them a part of your annual holiday celebration – for me, my grandchildren and their grandchildren will know who Awesome Audrey is…and if all goes well so will the rest of the world and that is how I can keep my grandmother a part of our Annual Christmas Celebration.
Breathe in, breath out, there is always a way – remember this day is about unconditional love and that extends to selflove, it’s about hope so even if you are in a bad situation right now hope for a better tomorrow, that is your Christmas gift to you.
You are loved.
Merry Christmas and I can’t wait to release my New Year’s episode next week where we talk about setting up our mindset for a very prosperous year to come – this is going to be an amazing episode do not miss it.
Remember to like share subscribe, follow me on Instagram @JessicaVibez I am Jessica Lambert your host for Jessie’s World and I am wishing you a very happy holiday season God Bless.