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Hosted by Dr. Val Civelli, White Coat Black Sheep explores physiology, functional medicine, and the medical questions most people are told not to ask.
This is where evidence meets curiosity, where dogma gets uncomfortable, and where real world medicine takes priority over headlines.
From understanding your lab work to debunking hormone myths, medication misconceptions, and optimization strategies, this podcast helps you understand what is actually happening inside your body.
If you care about health and think there might be a better way to practice medicine, you’re in the right place.
Thank you for joining me.
This is Jose Gonzalez, uh, one
of my favorite clients at Trifecta Medical.
Thank you. Yeah, thank you. Thank you for having me. Yeah.
I am grateful that you are spending the next, uh,
30 minutes to an hour, however long you are able to provide.
We'll go as long as we get need to. I'm ready.
How was your day today?
Busy, but well, um, I work at a junior high, so I deal
with a lot of junior high kids.
Uh oh. Yeah. Very active, busy.
Um, along with that though, requires a lot of energy. Okay.
But I think you can feed off energy.
I'm a individual that feeds off the indi uh, others' energy.
Yeah. But at the same time, um, I'm in a good place in life
that if I need to create the energy,
I can bring that to the table.
Okay. Yeah. I kind of picked that up right away
whenever we just, in the chats that we had.
Um, I think it was really, um,
just insightful to like, watch you process the things
that you knew and the things
that I knew, and then blend them.
'cause both of us, I feel like, share the space of,
we don't hate modern medicine.
It's not an anti, uh, you know, against the science
or the grain, like the dogma, like the main old school,
you know, processes.
But it's more of like just asking those questions, like,
why do we do what we do?
And patients aren't feeling heard.
I've been on that side of it,
and it seems like you've also been on that side,
and it's like, as a doctor, all I can prep, like give is,
uh, medication, you know?
So I, I was like, I have to do more than just this.
It feels so pointless.
Yeah. Um, just kinda like my natural progression
of growing and learning.
Um, I have, I believe that if you're not growing,
you're dying in all areas.
Mm-hmm. Whether it's in your relationships,
whether it's financially, whether it's spiritually,
whether there's emotionally mm-hmm.
Or health. So I'm always looking at, um,
how can I improve my longevity.
Mm-hmm. Um, my wellness. Yeah.
Um, I have this vision of wholeness. Mm-hmm.
Uh, what does that look like?
Yeah. What does that look like
Year? So for
me, it starts off, uh, spiritually. Mm-hmm.
Um, and then everything flows from there.
You can have somebody who's emotionally
and mentally tough mm-hmm.
But can still suffer with a lot
of mental health issues.
Mm-hmm. But you show me a mature spiritual person.
Mm-hmm. And they're mentally and emotionally sound,
and there's a difference because it comes within.
Yeah. Um, so again, um,
it starts spiritually, then it grows,
that flows to the mind.
Mm-hmm. Uh, and then that flows, you know, physically. Yeah.
If you're physically not in a good place mm-hmm.
Then you cannot do the things that you want to do.
Um, whether it's being active
or being, showing up as a father
or showing up at work, right?
Mm-hmm. 'cause it all, it all blends.
We're all, it's all interconnected.
So I'm always looking at areas of how can I grow. Mm-hmm.
Um, you know, from, from a fitness,
from a nutritional standpoint, uh mm-hmm.
Spiritually, I mean, we can go on and on and on.
So for me, that's the key. Um mm-hmm.
Being whole spiritually sound and,
and everything flows from there to the mental,
the emotional side, and then the physical side.
That's a, I mean, that's your core.
So that's a really good, those are my pillars. Yeah. Yep.
And then physically, you know, health
and wellness is very important to you.
And taking a natural approach, it is more
off the, the mainstream.
You know, there, it seems easier to just inject things that,
or, or go towards synthetics or, uh, like a fake energy.
Anything that like, enhances you short term,
but you're choosing a, a longer path.
You want to live longer.
You want to do things a natural way.
And, you know, to do that
and gain muscle, keep the muscle, keep your health,
keep your mental clarity and your peace.
Was there something in your life that maybe
prompted you to shift?
Or have you always had this perspective?
So let me kind of go back a little bit
to your previous question.
Like, how did this journey on fitness and health started?
Right? Mm-hmm. Um, you know,
I think I can probably say honest, just my experience,
everybody when they start this health journey, fitness is
for vanity, selfish reasons.
Like, you want to look good
because you want to attract compliments.
So you want to attract, attract the opposite sex, right?
Mm-hmm. I mean, I'll be honest,
that's why I started working out 20 years ago. So
That kick started your journey, it
Started kicked, kick
started That journey. Aesthetic of it.
Yeah. And then, um, through that journey, you know,
obviously you get temptations of, uh, in our town,
we're very well known for individuals,
high school kids starting, um, steroids mm-hmm.
At a young age. Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah.
Um, luckily for whatever reason,
I never chose that route.
And I just consistently just try to do it the right way.
Um, it's been a long journey. Now.
I'm 30 years into it, 50 years now.
So I've been in working out fitness
in industry for 30 years.
But through that journey, you know, things change. Mm-hmm.
Um, you evolved as an individual, you adapt to new things.
Mm-hmm. You find out different things that work better
for your body, whether it's different body
movements, different lifts.
Mm-hmm. Um, styles
Of working Out, styles of working out.
Um, I'm very old school, uh, traditional, where
I think in order, if you're gonna grow muscle,
you just gotta lift heavy stuff. So you're
A heavyweight low rep.
Um, a combination of both. Mm-hmm.
Because you need, you need both. Mm-hmm. Really.
Um, target the different muscle fibers. Mm-hmm.
Slow and fat. Mm-hmm. Fast twitch muscle fibers.
So you need both. So I do a lot of compounds,
and then I do a lot of like, um, supplemental exercises too,
um, with high reps.
Okay. So you can target both.
Um, studies show that that's what actually helps
Grow. Well, that's awesome.
Yeah. So over the years just adapted.
Uh, and then you, you know, you grow
and then you start realizing, I, I wish I could say
that I was disciplined enough in some areas,
but, uh, like I said, I'm a man of faith.
There is about eight, nine years ago that I had a drink
of alcohol and my body just rejected it.
Mm-hmm. I wish I can say, you know, I just woke up one day
and I'm like, no, your body rejected it.
Right? Mm-hmm. Um, we hear stor stories in the medical
field, uh, women that who get breast transplants,
but their body rejects it.
Right. So, oh, yeah. It, it is, is is kind of similar.
So for me, alcohol was pushed aside.
So I haven't had a drink in like, seven years. Um, was it
Like in initially something that was, um,
I guess a disruption in some sort of way? Yeah.
So, or Affecting
You. I, I'll give you an example.
Went out to dinner.
At the time I was married, went out to dinner with a couple,
had dinner and drinks, um, two glasses of wine.
I woke up in the middle of the night, like, like I just
pounded bottles.
Right. Interesting.
Um, So then I associated it with that, right? Mm-hmm.
And then the next time, I'm not a big, by now,
I'm not a heavy drinker at all.
Mm-hmm. But I go out the next time again
with couples and have one glass.
Mm-hmm. And it was miserable.
So then I'm like, this is no longer for me. Right.
Sometimes you just outgrow things in life,
whether they're relationships or hobbies or whatnot. Know
Why this was, Why. Yeah.
Do you know why, Why
No one's told you no.
Oh, this is fun. So enlight me please.
So you, if you have one to two drinks,
and then you feel, as you're describing,
as my body rejected me.
But really you're saying, did you feel flushed?
Like you felt like you're having an allergic reaction?
No, I, I woke up in the middle
of the night like I was hungover.
Like somebody beat me with the bat.
Yeah. So you have a severe deficiency of a certain enzyme
that most people have that allows you to break down alcohol.
And So I'm lacking that.
So you are lacking it, and you
can't give thank, thank you, God for
That. Yeah.
So it's like god's like, choose something else.
Right? Yeah. So, um, so that particular, um, situation,
like, I guess the question is can you supplement that?
Yes, we can. It's not a readily available thing,
like glutathione helps.
That would help with a hangover feeling.
But, um, that's such a fun fact,
and I'm glad that you have never heard that. No, I know.
Yeah. And I have no desire to like, honestly
to even have a drink anymore.
But, uh, so, you know, just kind of adapt through that.
And then, um, then at some point, you know, um,
God gave me this vision to I want you to live
to 140 years old.
Mm-hmm. So then I believe
It's Possible it is now with technology, now that you
and I have talked about it mm-hmm.
At our sessions. But,
so then you start looking into what does that look like?
What is it gonna take, right? Mm-hmm.
Um, 'cause we can have visions, we can have dreams. Mm-hmm.
But if you don't take the proper steps mm-hmm.
Actions mm-hmm.
Then you're never gonna achieve those things.
So then, you know, really dove deep into that, to doing
sauna four or five times a day, cold punches every day,
first thing in the morning, um, you know, working out, um,
being really precise with my nutrition. Mm-hmm. Um,
Foods. Yeah. Of food foods. You're
very precise with it. Um,
And then even incorporating extra cardio as you get older.
Right. Um, you
Just talking those whatcha you trying to achieve
with the extra cardio?
Well, two things. Um, obviously longevity, right?
We're looking at 140 years old,
and the, where I'm coming here, kind of like a crossroad is
I still have this vision of
what a 50-year-old body should look like.
Mm-hmm. Not what, not what the world,
but my vision of what a 50-year-old body should look like.
It more like 30, Uh, yeah.
25. Yeah.
Absolutely. I agree. So, yeah.
And, and that's, so that's, that's, there's
No reason why you can't And Yeah.
And, and you, and you can nowadays. Mm-hmm.
Like, uh, what I've learned through this journey is
that I've achieved the best physique
that I could actually ever have at the age of 48.
And do I look like I'd looked at 48?
No, but I'm pretty darn close to it.
And with the right steps and measurements mm-hmm.
If I needed to. Yeah.
I'm only like five, six away, five,
six weeks away from doing uhhuh what I need
to, to look like that again.
Right. Yeah. So I never really deviate
and get like, quote unquote out of shape. Right. Um,
Yeah. 'cause when I see
you, like just it over time,
your hard on yourself,
but I'm like, I think you are doing fantastic.
Yeah. Well, thank you. Like, different me, you know,
we have different metrics of what is wellness,
what is longevity, you know, in my industry
to live longer is such an ambitious goal.
You know, one 40 sounds crazy,
but the answer to find that is really to go slower.
Which is just so weird
because you would think like, I need to try harder
to live longer,
but you need to actually like, mostly do less
and live less hard and less aggressively, like Yeah.
More Peacefully. So
There's a rhythm, and I think you
and I talked a little bit about this, right?
There's a rhythm to life, and I've always, believe it
or not, up until probably seven years ago, I had
that mentality of like, I'm going to out ground you.
Mm-hmm. I'm gonna outwork you.
Uh, if I need to work out, you know,
wake up at two o'clock in the morning, so
before I became a vice principal.
Absolutely. I used to be a school psychologist, so
I would wake up at two, three o'clock in the morning
and start writing psychology reports and,
and plans for students. Um, because
It feels like, like borrowed time, right?
It feels like you've gained extra time.
Well, for well, To get ahead.
Yes. I used to, but then there was, there's this, this,
um, ego.
Mm-hmm. There's this ego, like, I'm mailing,
I'm emailing all you fools mm-hmm.
Before you wake up and have a cup of coffee. Yeah.
I already wrote two reports, it worked out. Here you go.
So, but that's, yeah. Like, I'm going to, uh, ground you.
I, I I'll ground, ground you. Mm-hmm.
And part of that mentality too was
just, uh, bringing sports.
Um, and then Kobe Bryant was like, uh,
at one time was an idol.
Um, and his mentality was, I'm gonna do two workouts a day.
So it doesn't matter how hard you work out,
because it compounds, right?
Mm-hmm. You do two workouts a day after 14 day
after seven days is 14.
Right. You've only done seven. I've done 14.
And when you start compounding that after a month,
after a year, after five years,
after 10 years, you're not catching me.
Right. So I had this, but Yeah.
The thing is, which is not accurate. It's not healthy.
Yeah. It's not accurate. It's not healthy either.
That's a, that's a false belief that we used to fall for.
Mm-hmm. I, I fell for it. Yeah.
So I've adapted a different rhythm. Right.
Um, very intentional about my life
and what I allow myself to spend time
because, um, I, I'm very honored and grateful that I'm here.
But when I say yes to this mm-hmm.
I said no to something else. Right. Exactly.
So you have to be very intentional about those things.
Right. Am I perfect? No, but we try to be intentional. Yeah.
And then now going back to the question of finding a better,
better rhythm of life is, you know, you reflect at night
what needs to be done the next day.
Where did I miss my barriers?
Which what you're describing is really a meditation.
So medically, there's a lot of studies
that just show meditating.
Even 10 minutes is just healing. So what, that's okay.
That's awesome. Yeah. Go ahead. And,
and that's science supported.
Well, not only that, but, but faith, right? Yeah.
We, we talked about this too, off the air.
Um, what is your brain neuroplasticity, right? Yeah.
It changes, it adapts it,
it does when we feed it our thoughts.
Yeah. Um, and all of that, believe it
or not, goes back biblically.
Mm-hmm. Like all this stuff, like it's in the Bible. Yeah.
So I've adapted a better rhythm where you, I,
I reflect, meditate.
What are the things where I missed the mark?
How could I have improved today? Okay.
I'm gonna leave that behind.
How can I use that and see it as a way of overcoming it
and not fall into the same mistake the next day?
Right. That's so thoughtful.
Then I do, uh, am I perfect against this or No,
but we try to be intentional, right?
Yeah. 'cause otherwise, what happens is life comes
and whatever, which way the wind blows, you go.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And then you wake up one day
and you are either divorced or you're bankrupt,
and you're like, how did I get here?
Yeah. Well, because you're not, I mean,
those are extreme examples,
But, but are they though? I don't know.
No, they're not. No, they're not. I've
Had two divorces that's that's too many.
And same here. Um, and, but, um,
but the beautiful thing about it too, those
that I found out is that, um, I'm at a point of life
where if I'm gonna experience any pain,
there's gonna be a trade off.
What's That? I'm, that trade off that pain is going to,
is gonna cost somebody something.
Meaning I'm either gonna gain some wisdom from it. Mm-hmm.
It's gonna make me stronger. Mm-hmm.
It's going to propel me to grow in something. Mm-hmm.
But that pain is not just gonna be like,
oh, I'm hurting them.
That no, there's going be,
there's gonna be a purpose for it.
A purpose for like all the suffering.
Actually, I say that. That's funny.
There's purpose in it. Yeah.
There's purpose. Everything I learned
was painfully learned.
And I don't know how to learn. It doesn't have
To be that way Too. I
don't know. But does it, I don't know how to learn.
It doesn't have to be stress.
Learning is the most effective,
but maybe there I would take it.
I would please tell me the other way.
So, so let me finish back up a little bit. Sure.
And we'll come back to this. So the better rhythm
of life too, is, um, you know,
on Sundays I reflect, I try to pause.
Mm-hmm. I don't try to do any work.
I try to really spend some time in myself,
um, and not at work.
Mm-hmm. And it's a way of pausing, recharging myself,
to prepare me for the, well, I'm so healthy,
so I can be more focused.
Right. Yeah. And more efficient.
Just one day per week is
Yeah. Yeah. And then
I tell people longevity.
Like if you're not used to, and if you're not used to it,
um, because in this society, in this world, it's like,
you know, grind, grind work, that that's gonna, well,
you're gonna grind yourself
to some mental illness. Right. Some
Healthy, well, I don't wanna say, you know,
mental illness based, been there.
Yeah. So, but you just like drive yourself into the ground,
like full depletion.
Like you run out of all of your chemicals.
Like you have just nothing left in the tank,
Or, or you, or you drive your family to the ground.
Yeah. I don't, I should do, I should talk more.
I mean, I'm speaking from experience, so Yeah.
But so try to be very intentional about Sundays
and just reflecting and taking back.
But to go back to your, um,
what was your other question? You follow up that, um,
Um, I asked you, I threw a several,
I kinda showered questions your way,
but, um, really, I mean, the point is to go slower
and to take those intentional pauses,
which are science-based, that's meditation.
And that, that's a space where, you know,
if you're always in overdrive
and always thinking you can borrow time
and just do laps around people, you are,
your heart rate's, it's faster.
So your heart is working harder.
And to work harder, you're using energy.
And that takes neurotransmitters, chemicals, enzymes.
Like you're, you're, you're doing physical work
and giving off energy. Right. So, and
Damage in our body. Right.
It's damage and, and,
And, and, and why we're trying to be healthy,
like it doesn't, doesn't
Make any sense. Right? Yeah. And that,
yeah, that damage
is actually called oxidation.
So fatty oxidation, you're taking from your stored, uh,
sources around the liver, visceral organs,
or, you know, any fat storage,
and you're just like, that's what you're using.
And it can be good short term,
it can increase your cortisol,
which is actually not bad short term
that increases your immune system.
Right. It's like an immune boost.
But then chronically, you're killing yourself. Right.
You have to have the rest, you have to have that
recovery phase to build the muscle to, to heal,
to replenish everything that you just used up.
Yeah. Burned out. I agree. I
Agree. Yeah. And then just kind
of going back to, um,
I said an extreme example is
that we go doing life without being intentional,
and then the wind blows,
and then all of a sudden we're either bankrupt
or there's, uh mm-hmm.
Issues in the, in, in a relationship or at work. Right.
And that part of it is because we were not intentional.
Mm-hmm. And looking at where we are at
in certain areas of our life.
And then here we are dealing with the mess.
Right? Yeah. And, you know, like, so say you're intending
to slow down, and in regular medicine you would say, okay,
well here's a Xanax.
Do you see anything wrong with that?
Or is that the space to deviate?
I, I'm a big believer.
I don't believe in any, um, I've done a little bit
of research, obviously you're the expert on this area,
but, um, any substance that you take,
there's gonna be a side effect.
Mm-hmm. And, and at least completely agree.
Just to simplify, just
to simplify things based on the knowledge
and my, uh, studying
and research is that, um, we treat
symptoms not the root.
Mm-hmm. Right?
Totally. That's what brought me here.
That's so, so, because it's
Not, it's not, uh, adequate.
And I've been, I've been pretty healthy, to be honest.
I've been pretty healthy all my
life. I'm still pretty healthy
By the standards of, by the standard
of medicine. You're, is,
Is, is. Well, thank
you. Well, thank you.
Um, so, like, to me, that's never made any sense.
And I used to be a school psychologist Right. All the time.
I used to be a school psychologist,
and at one time I believed that, you know, that all
of our mental illnesses were chemical imbalances. Right.
I completely agree. Here's medication, right? Yeah.
Um, so let me go as far as medicine,
and I'll just be transparent.
Mm-hmm. Um, I went through a divorce seven years ago.
I did not want at all, and I'm smiling now
because that crushed me.
Mm-hmm. That crushed me.
We're having this conversation years, seven years ago.
Mm-hmm. You would've looked at me
and you were like, you're pathetic, dude.
Aw, get over. But that's where I was. So that was
Like your lowest low.
I was, that was my lowest low. Yeah.
But again, based on that, at some point, um,
and I'll just be very transparent, there's a time
and place for medication.
Mm-hmm. Uh, I literally went 30 days without sleeping.
Not 10 minutes. Not 10 minutes. I was still going to work.
I was still working out. It, it, it is not healthy, right?
No, it's not healthy because then you have a severe crash.
So I needed, like, harm is happening, right. So
Years are taken off. So
at that, yeah. So at that point, I said, okay, like,
I cannot, I'll work this out no matter how much I worked out
and how much I rent, I'm not out benching,
I'm not out squatting this divorce.
But what I learned later on is what I realized
that I was really mentally and emotionally fragile.
And this is no shot at anybody. Mm-hmm.
I'm just reflecting on me reflecting, reflect.
I will never, ever, ever,
ever feel like that again.
Ever.
I love that. Um, so what I say, pain's gonna pay me.
You got me, you got me there, you
Got school. That was a life
Lesson.
But again, because I used that,
God opened my eyes
and helped me realize what I needed.
And that started the journey of going even deeper
and more focused mm-hmm.
On my health and overall wholeness.
I didn't know what wholeness was. Mm-hmm.
And through this journey, I discovered wholeness.
You had to be broken first, which is like,
You have to be awful.
So, yeah. So, but I've shared this with you, kind
of like off, off record, um, you know, people
who believe in, in Christianity
or whatnot, we have this Americanized Christianity
where we want Jesus, gimme the job.
Jesus gimme that marriage, gimme that car. Mm-hmm.
You know, gimme all of that. Mm-hmm.
We all want that resurrection. Mm-hmm.
But nobody wants to be crucified. Yeah.
Nobody wants to crucify. Yeah.
But what I've learned is I salivate, I love the crucifixion.
Mm-hmm. Because I know it's gonna pay me something. Yeah.
And on the other end, I'm gonna come out
way better, stronger.
I'm gonna come out spiritually, emotionally fit some,
somehow I'm gonna come out better
because of it if you do it the right way.
Right. Um, going back to medication,
you can medicate yourself and, and be numb.
You're not growing. Mm-hmm.
So there's a time in place,
just going back to the whole medication.
There's a time in place. Yeah. I had it be stabilized. Yeah.
So after about three months of being on medication,
I was like, okay, it is, it's time.
Yeah. And I did this kind
of like on my own without my doctor.
I don't recommend this, but, um, we're all different. Yeah.
But slowly, I wound myself off of it.
And I'd say by, I believe by the end of the fourth month,
I was completely, and I still had a
process and deal with things. Right. Um,
Oh yeah. That's always gonna
be on the table.
Right. But, um, but again, that's where my whole, uh,
I started finding out too things like, um, you know,
you can't experience depression
or anxiety when you're moving.
You can be digging a hole.
You can be working out, you can be walking. Mm-hmm.
You cannot experience anxiety
or depression as long as you're moving.
Well, to that note, I feel like
maybe staying moving was my tool to,
to really sit still long enough to not even feel sadness.
Like I'm building an empire. I can't feel that.
But it it does at some point, which come up. Yeah. Yeah,
Yeah. Yeah. So, so,
and here's where I'm going with this too,
because all of us will kind of like, either will focus all
that energy on our work,
not work it, working out or whatever.
Mm-hmm. And it's, and it is good,
but this is where I'm going.
At some point, you gotta go in there.
You have to, and deal with that root.
You have to because mm-hmm.
Otherwise, it's gonna manifest at some
point of your life through
Other relationships, through some level of finance,
Health or codependency.
Codependency or something. Right? Yeah. Yeah.
Whether it's tv, whether it's spending Yeah.
Because you never dealt with whatever that root is.
There's a lot of predictive comorbidities.
So like different diseases that you can physically predict
and see come out
and, you know, there's studies, it shows like five, 10 years
or I'll have to pull those.
But it's, it's, I believe it still, it,
it goes into your body
and then you just manifest it into some illness.
It's gotta come out somewhere. It
Literally does.
And in a way, right, like you, you started your, uh,
career pursue that and really mm-hmm.
Energized your, your pain
or trauma to grow that, which is great.
Yeah. Uh, I did it as far as
growing even more physically in, in, in and emotionally.
Mm-hmm. But yes, at some point I had to
really go in and,
and forgive my kid's mom, you know, at mm-hmm.
Really, really at the, at the coach, because it would
Make you sick. It, it would make you
Toxic. Right. Like we, we, we
talk about,
but even, even like resentment
at one point was I thought it was good
because he would've energized me
and I've had some of the best workouts.
Right. But at the root of it, yeah.
I'm still drinking that poison. Right? Yeah. So, um, but so
That's dopamine dump that, right.
You were surged with epi nor epi,
and then you can, now it looks like you change
that into like your, your cold plunges
and other forms to access that, that source. Right?
Yeah. And I think I've, I, you know, I, I believe,
and I feel like I've done the, the deep healing
and everybody has their own different ways mm-hmm.
Of doing it. Right. Uh, whether it's through counseling, uh,
was lucky enough that, um, God placed some mentors,
spiritual leaders in my life,
and that helped with the whole growing and healing.
Um, now I do the workouts and all of that,
but that is, there's a different why I am doing it
now, now is mm-hmm.
I wanna live long, but not just
because, um, oh look, I live longer than
There, but to win, I'm trying to win again.
Yeah. It's not like for me now is to be around
for my kids, their grandkids.
Mm-hmm. Um, can I be a positive influence in whatever
setting that I am, whether it's the grocery store,
can I touch somebody's heart mm-hmm.
In life. And, and I'm, I'm not trying to say I'm this
big person, but if I can help somebody in any capacity, then
that's an extra token
that we can make the place this world
a better place. We're still
Aligned with that.
So, so I look at it that way. Right? Absolutely.
And it's not about the money, it's not
about any of those things.
Um, I've come to the realization of, of wholeness
is really, really important.
How many times do we see successful people,
whether they're in the business space, athletics, um,
entertainment, appear
To have it all In, in, in the commit suicide.
Yeah. Yeah. Fully successful.
Like, you look into like how Yeah. I'll
Tell you why. Like you had it
all. I,
I'll tell you why you were not
whole. Yeah. You were not complete.
Yeah. They probably, yeah.
And, and, and, and part of it is too,
is I've done some studies on this, um, there's a difference
between success and fulfillment.
Mm-hmm. Right. There's a formula of success.
If I work out for 30 years straight
and I eat pretty healthy, I'm gonna have a decent physique.
Mm-hmm. Is that fulfillment though? You know what I mean?
Subjective. So, so, right.
Well, well, well, that's what I'm saying. Yeah. Right.
What, what's the core, what's the reason what,
why driving this, so mm-hmm.
That, to me, that's why wholeness is very important.
It's, um, I think that it aligns more
with fulfillment mm-hmm.
Than success. I like that.
And there's nothing wrong with success.
I'm not Yeah. You know, like to each its own.
But I, I would hate to,
for anybody, including anybody close in my close circle
to reach success, crossed that line and be miserable.
Yeah. I feel like I have a good one for you with that.
Tell me, tell exactly that.
So I'm 42, my first You're a baby. Okay. I'll take it.
So my first career, so as, uh, 21, I did radiology.
So I did like 10 years in that.
And at some point in the middle, probably, like, I dunno,
when I was 24, I was like, I'm gonna be a doctor.
So Awesome. I was working full time, burning myself out,
and also doing pre-med and trying to volunteer.
I didn't know how everything worked.
I just like, bought the books, how to become a doctor.
I literally went to Barnes and Nobles
and like, was like, I'm, and I didn't have the right mentor,
but I, I tried, I thought that I had good mentors,
but people mostly don't know and they get it wrong.
And that's okay. So I feel like it took me longer
and I had to want it more.
And I had to figure out my why several different low points
and, and just like, just push through
and, uh, almost burn out several times and try to quit.
And people were like, you're not quitting.
Just all of this, you know, 20 years about, I mean, it was,
it was way longer than it needed to be,
but, but you're here.
I made it. And you know what?
I got my first job as a doctor after I graduated
and I just cried.
I was like, this is awful.
This is awful. I,
I'm Sorry. Thought.
So I did a telemedicine position,
and I really feel like the people
that were my support team just forgot about
me because I'm at home.
But to me, I was like, it took me so many years to be here.
I was like overzealous, ready, waiting at my computer
to call my patients.
And they had like 40 people on there.
It was supposed to be a long day,
but then here it is like 11 o'clock
and nobody has readied any of my patients.
There's like a process, like a check-in,
and I've tried to even like, just go around them.
I'm like, I'll just do it myself.
I can ready people how, like how hard could it be?
And create more work for you Yeah.
And add more work to you. Right. Oh my.
But I, but I didn't mind it. Right.
'cause I was like, but then
so the admin like, came down on me.
Right. Right. And so I just, I was like, this is horrible.
The admin in the control. Yeah.
I'm sorry, I had to throw that in. You know? Why? Why?
Because I think you and I are very similar in that respect.
Um, something that's simple.
Like even, even in my marriage where, you know what?
You're not doing it good enough for Right. Enough.
I'll just do it. Yeah.
That's me. So they, so then,
but it's what, what you do, it's not good.
It's, it's really poor leadership, by the way.
It's poor leader leadership. I mean that, I mean that
No, it is I agree. Of
my heart. Yeah. And I actively work on
That myself, because then you become for myself.
You yeah. You be, you, you enable them. Right.
I'm my own worker. You enable people. Yeah.
Yeah. So part of I'm
Like, how can I, yeah.
It's so you're in burnout that way. It's a very bad plan.
Right. You need help. You need to support. We all do. Yeah.
It's like there's a team, because there's a team.
You're sharing the workload.
So like, not one person is doing all the
work, but here's me.
I'm like, I'll just scoot you all the
way I'll, and that's stupid.
I was so tired. I was so mad, I was so irritated,
and I hated my job.
And I was just like, out of energy.
It, it physically just fatigued me.
And I was just like, this is not it.
I have to figure it out. Yeah.
So I, I think it's, um, so
what I've kinda learned through all of that, right?
Any, any door that I enter, um, I visualize
what do I want my family, my career to look like, um,
five, 10 years from now.
Mm-hmm. And what do I gotta do to get there?
Because we're born to create when we try to manage. Mm-hmm.
That's when stress, like, that's when things start kind
of like we're born to create.
Yeah. Um, and when you visualize and you see things
and you start working, that's when we become creators.
Yeah. And so on that note, like when I saw what I wanted
to be and create and do, but then the gap is like this.
I'm the first doctor in my family. Amen.
Nobody's gonna do it. Nobody knows how to do it.
No one's going to help me do it
because they can't, you know?
So it's really just like, I have to just figure it out.
And there's those moments where like, you do have to give
a lot more than your counterparts.
And it looks like this is not fair.
Like this person, they get to just live such a,
Is like, is life fair though?
It's not fair. It's not, it, it's not fair.
And I had to like make peace with that.
Peace with that. And you do, I,
I have this analogy, right?
Um, in the sports, uh, I don't know
how familiar you're with Boston Marathon.
I've never run a marathon before,
but Boston Marathon, right.
Do you have about 20 to 30,000 runners? Let me ask you this.
Is there enough room for all 20, 30,000
to start at the starting line?
That's a good question. No. So they're what?
There's, yeah. There's only so
Much. So does everybody start
at the starting line? No. No.
So in your position, oh, you didn't get to you, didn't you?
You're probably not way in the back. I feel like
I was way, I was way You were in the middle sister.
Was I, I don't know. I was pretty back there.
We can, we can, we can, we can probably go
to maybe like Africa or some of the star world countries
and, and let's, let's compare.
I'm not trying to like, that's funny. Minimize Yeah.
Your, yeah. Your, your path and your journey.
'cause it was challenging. Like I admire like that you,
that you sought this goal.
Yeah. And regardless of the obstacles
that included lack of support. Yeah. You,
I had a lot of good reasons to quit
You, but you didn't.
Mm-hmm. And you can take that to the bank. Thank you.
And anytime you, anytime you come up with any other
challenges later in life mm-hmm.
You have that mm-hmm.
Memory and your memory drive that you can tap into it.
So I'm gonna give you something very biblical
testimony, you know what that means?
Mm-hmm. Testimony. There's tests.
So biblically there's stories in the Bible that testified
that certain things took place.
Yeah. And they built, um, this,
whether this like a rock or,
or some type of, uh, not a tempo,
but, um, structure to remind them like, Hey,
we were there and we came here.
Yeah. And the same thing with us.
We have to testify to ourselves. Like, but we never do.
Um, like no, I went through
all those challenges painfully in medical field.
Yeah. But I survived. Mm-hmm. And I'm better for it. Mm-hmm.
So when you come through a storm again,
I've been through storms before.
Mm-hmm. And you tap into that to help you
believe because mm-hmm.
Hope. If you don't have hope in faith
in anything, then it's,
Ugh. I, I feel like
I had a moment like losing hope
and faith in marriages, especially the second one.
I was like, oh my goodness. Seriously again.
But then, you know, like walking through that whole process,
knowing how painful it was the first time,
but then it's like I had, uh, my cousin, she's like,
she started laughing one day
and I'm just like, breaking down.
I'm sorry. Yeah. No, it's okay.
But it's, but, but the pain is
where I learned in and I grew. But but look
At you. You're, but you're smiling
for me. Yeah. Same
Here. Yeah. She's
like, you're fine.
Like, you're never gonna be
as low as you were the first time.
Like, it's like you Exactly. Like you said. Yeah.
You just don't, you just don't. Yeah.
You learn from it and no one's going to, you're,
you're actually gonna get through it. It's fine.
You do. Yeah. We always do. We always make it through
Whether, you know, and, and I think it's wiring.
Like you're, you've created in that stress a pathway
that the nerves and the dendrites,
it's physical structures that we've proven.
They're, they're physically there. There's proof.
And we're creating pathways in the way that we think Yes.
And cope. And the way that we think leads to how we feel.
Yeah. And the way that we feel leads to coping. Yes. Good
Or bad. So it's gonna
be a shorter duration
and not as, not as bad. Yeah.
Yeah. Interesting.
And you know, like when also
whenever we, you think about pain, there's people
that have no pain.
Can you imagine? It seems like that would be a good thing.
No, they're physically born without any
sensory receptors.
They cannot have any sensory or sensation of pain.
Hot, cold, sharp.
That's, that's interesting.
But I think that it, on the other side of the token,
they're probably not able to experience joy
and happiness at the level that others
Interesting. I actually need
to see
what research the emotional center was involved.
I'm sure, you know, there's some variation,
but what I can say is
that you don't realize like all like the little micro
changes that we did in position, right?
Like, you're sitting here, like you shift your
weight, you move a little bit.
Like you have to have that to, to get like blood supplied
to the skin that you're sitting on.
You know, like you have to have those micro moves.
And there's people who just don't do that.
They don't think to do it.
'cause their body doesn't tell them to do it.
It's just so crazy to think that that's an actual, like,
necessary evil,
But Yeah. But,
but are created so unique, right? Mm-hmm.
Yeah. I think think about that.
And I, okay, so all things that we just said,
I don't still see like another way
that you don't painfully get to,
to learning. I think it just, you have to,
Well, I, I disagree.
There's two ways that we can learn, right?
Um, so I'll give you the behavior psychology
background, um, example.
A kid goes and touches the, the,
the fire you get burned, right?
Mm-hmm. That's one way of learning, right? Yeah. Yeah. Um,
I'm tired of that way. The other, that's
The other way. The, the, the other, the
other, the other way
is like, I'm ready.
Hey honey, uh, don't touch. The fire hurts.
Oh. Like listening to Yeah.
Wisdom. So what I've learned is,
is I've been very stubborn and I'm so,
So Stubborn how to learn the hard way.
Ugh. Yeah. But it doesn't have to be that way. Yeah.
It does not. So I, I try to align myself with people
with a lot of wisdom Yeah.
And listen to them and
Just choosing them. Right.
So, and then not Yeah.
But then you learn from them so you learn quicker. Mm-hmm.
You save yourself some pain and trouble. Mm-hmm.
Right? That'd be great. Right? Yeah.
So that's part, that's part of like, one of the things
that I try to surround myself
and it's really difficult to find, um,
just solid human beings who really are willing
to give their time and their love because it's love.
Right? Yeah. Because somebody who's gonna mentor you
and give you wisdom mm-hmm.
Uh, they're not really expecting anything in return.
And you and I have talked, I've had some conversations
about what is love, right?
Yeah. Conditional, unconditional, right? Yeah.
But somebody who's willing to pour into you,
Regardless of how terrible of a person you are,
right. That is like, and
Yeah. Yeah.
That's crazy. So to provide some wisdom
and some guidance and, and to be able to be open
and listen to that advice
and that wisdom, whether it's a fitness mm-hmm.
In the fitness industry or health industry
and taking it and run with it.
Right? Yeah. Um, that saves you a lot of time.
That's a, I think that's a, that's a skill mm-hmm.
That we, um, as humans don't have.
But I think of it too is that there's not a lot
of individuals who are willing to quote unquote,
I would call it mentoring.
Mm-hmm. Um, and spent,
because you're giving your time, right? Yeah,
Definitely. Um,
But I think that that's where I'm at this point in life
Where, and the goal is be whole. I like that.
Um, when you give here, I'll give you this analogy,
um, a tree, apple tree.
Mm-hmm. What does it grow
Apples For the tree or for others?
For others. So when you have wisdom, when you have love
and you give it to others, guess what happens to that tree?
More fruit grows. But we've been taught
That is Really cool. So
we've been taught whether it's money,
whether it's knowledge, whether it is whatever it is.
Mm-hmm. Love, we're we society tells you
to keep it.
Mm-hmm. When you keep it, it doesn't grow,
it doesn't bear any more fruit.
Yep. When I give it mm-hmm. More. Yeah.
Love more wisdom, whatever it is
that I'm giving more growth inside.
Yeah. 'cause there is a spirit in spirit in
me is not what the world or other gives.
Yeah. Does that make sense? Yeah, definitely.
But, um, it doesn't make sense
because it's really like reverse of how we've been trained
and how we've been raised Yeah.
And how society and the world works. Um,
Well, to me, my takeaway is just like, you have to like
look beyond yourself.
And so when I went into an industry initially thinking,
okay, I like aesthetics,
but I realized I don't so much care about the outside.
If I'm like, if I can already see that your inside is like
such, like, it's so not okay.
I can't ignore it. I'm not it healthy.
It's hard to talk Botox.
If I see that your soul is hurting, I
Know. You're, you're striking the
nerve here.
That's why That's I got into functional me's.
Here's I, and I love, and I love this too, um,
because, um, you know,
people going in, whether it's steroids,
whether it's the enhancement,
you're doing it literally
because you're not okay with yourself.
Mm-hmm. At the root of it, you're not,
you're not okay with it.
Like, just to be honest. Right? Yeah.
And we all have insecurities. I'm not Yeah.
But what if it's your job?
Like say your job is like to compete,
Like, are we talking about bodybuilding?
Mm-hmm. I wouldn't do it because,
But if that's your passion, you love it so much.
I mean, to hear, to see the competitions and to see the,
'cause there's natural competitions. Yes.
You're Right. There's natural competitions. Yeah.
So, like for me is I'm gonna stay as whole at
as natural mm-hmm.
As God created me to be. Mm-hmm.
Anytime I start, especially now like 10 50,
I didn't think this way, but mm-hmm.
Where I'm at now, anytime I start walking away from my
natural creating abilities and skills mm-hmm.
Then I'm walking away from God's plan for me. Mm-hmm.
God doesn't want me to do steroids. To compete for what?
Yeah. Because, uh, this is just me.
I'm here to glorify him and honor him.
Um, and anytime I step outside of
that, I become the idol. Mm-hmm.
Then my evil. So like, living your purpose is definitely,
I feel like the point,
but then it takes so hard to arrive there.
Like some people seem to find their purpose really early.
I just, I took me to, it took me a
While. Completely,
completely transparent.
I sometimes even question if I'm walking on purpose.
Yeah, no, I question that too. Um,
But, But, but then you have moments that,
But you, but because part of this is that we have, um,
we have purpose, we have assignments,
and they're kind of the same, but they're not.
So an assignment, I'll give you an example.
Uh, I have daughters, right?
Um, so part of an assignment in this, part
of my purpose right now is those kids, for me
to be the best father that I can be for whatever age
and whatever need that they have, so
Have, so it's like your level of impact on
them, your footprint,
Right? So that's an assignment.
Um,
the job do you have is an assignment.
How are you gonna steward that?
I have an assignment at work.
Uh, how am I gonna lead the staff?
How am I gonna lead students? How am I gonna treat them?
How am I gonna discipline them? Mm-hmm. Yeah.
And it's, and it's, so there's an assignment
and it's not about me.
It's about how can I serve the students,
the staff, and the parents.
Mm-hmm. I pick up trash. I, I, it's, there's
When you can delegate it.
When I can delegate it, but I don't.
But I don't because it's a balance. You know?
You know, you know, one of the things that I've,
that I've come to realize, um,
that I really enjoy two characteristics that are really,
really hard to find in this world.
Um, and I don't have 'em. I'm trying, and we can
On those 'cause I know, But, um, it's hard to wrap up.
So it's, um, confidence and humility.
Okay. Confidence and humility.
If you can find individuals who are confident, um,
in humility that, because a lot of people have confidence,
but we lack humility.
If you can find individuals, those are really good traits
to find in leaders, believe it or
Not. Well, I've been humbled,
so I feel like
I'm surprised.
I feel I was, I was very humbled.
So through that, there's confidence in what we do here.
Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you, Jose.
Thanks for having me. This was a pleasure.
And, uh, let's do it again sometime. Absolutely.
Hope y'all learn something.
Wow.