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A podcast that holds horror to standards horror never agreed to. Hosts Jeremy Whitley, Ben Kahn, Emily Martin and guests watch, read, listen to, and check out movies, tv shows, comics, books, art and anything else from the horror genre and discuss it through a progressive lens. We'll talk feminism in horror, LGBTQ+ issues and representation in horror, racial and social justice in horror, disability and mental health/illness in horror, and the work of female and POC directors, writers, and creators in horror.
We're the podcast horror never agreed to take part in.
Emily: should really cover
the old Queen of Black Magic.
I watch that and it's.
bananas.
Ben: I'm just looking at how many
Jordan Peele movies we have on here.
I'm just reminded of that time when
someone was just like, man, three
great, like, three classics in a row.
Is Jordan Peele the best
horror director ever?
And Jordan Peele responded
saying, you put some goddamn
respect on John Carpenter's name.
Emily: Oh yeah.
Ben: And then when you look at, you ask
John Carpenter about any of that, he'd
just be like, I don't know, leave me the
fuck alone, I just wanna play video games.
Emily: I saw a great interview with
John Carpenter where he was talking
about, or I read like a snippet of
it, where people are like, what do
you think about elevated horror?
And he's like, I'm not familiar.
Ben: It's like, I don't
know and I don't care.
Emily: Yeah.
Yeah.
Ben: as much as, like, there's this, like,
romantic, tortured, creative, that's so
relatable, and almost, like, aspirational
in Scorsese's, like, And Miyazaki is
like, Oh, I'm so close to death, but I'm
only just now feel like I'm mastering
the art and I have so much more to do.
I feel like there's something way
more aspirational about John Carpenter
is just being like, Nah, I'm done.
I did it.
I'm good.
Emily: I live my life now.
Jeremy: he's got his little, uh, comics
imprint now and That is, his wife
seems to do most of the work for us.
She's chill as hell.
I met her at ALA.
Ben: Oh, Hell yeah.
Emily: nice.
Nice.
Jeremy: it was cool.
Good evening and welcome to
Progressively Horrified, the podcast
where we hold a horror to progressive
standards that never agree to.
We're, there were just too many movies
over this last year that we watched
for us to cover in one episode, so
we've gotta come back and do it again.
It is Still just a little
bit after Halloween for us.
It is, we're in November, but
it is after New Year's for you.
And we are still, still celebrating
our third anniversary because we
have been doing this for three years
somehow, some way we're still at it.
I am your host Jeremy Whitley and
with me tonight, I have a panel
of cinephiles and Cenobites.
First, they're here to challenge
sexy werewolf, sexy vampire,
binary, my co host Ben Kahn.
Ben, welcome back.
Ben: Yeah, let's rank movies.
Jeremy: Yes, let's give
objective numbers to
Emily: very
Ben: yo ass, WatchMojo.
Let's do it.
Emily: What is WatchMojo?
Ben: Top 10 anime moments that made
you go, whoa, that's an anime moment.
Emily: Oh, BuzzFeed.
Jeremy: It's a video BuzzFeed
Emily: Video BuzzFeed.
Ben: Top 10 anime betrayals.
Top 10 anime not betrayals.
What if
Jeremy: The Cinnamon Roll of
Cenobites, our co host Emily Martin.
Emily, what is your top anime betrayal?
Emily: Oh, uh, the rebuild of Evangelion.
Ben: I was gonna say the animation
quality in One Punch Man season 2.
Emily: I haven't seen season 2 yet.
Ben: Neither have I, because I
took one look at the animation
and was like, no, thanks.
Emily: Yeah,
Ben: I'm good.
Emily: Also the actual Yeah,
the actual quality of Jujutsu
Kaisen and how forgettable it is.
Boop, boop, boop!
Ben: Okay, that's so real, because as
someone who fucking reads and watches
so much goddamn shounen manga stories,
Jujutsu Kaisen is a lot of fun.
I could not tell you a
single character's name.
I watched the whole first season,
couldn't Gojo, I know Gojo.
Emily: know Gojo, too.
Because Gojo is, also shares a name
with the heavy duty soap that we
use in the print shop sometimes.
And that's how I remember Gojo.
Ben: Like, I can tell you all
about the fucking kekai gekai of
the fucking Uchiha clan and all
the different kinds of sharingan!
And, like, what the deal with the
Naruto I reckon my remember, all
the goddamn ninja clans could not
tell you the main character's name
of Jujutsu Kaisen, gun to my head.
Emily: yeah, I, yep.
I mean, I watched the first episode,
and I have trouble recalling it, because
Ben: I watched the whole first season!
Emily: Ah, jeez.
Well,
Ben: It's fun
Jeremy: Nerds!
You
Ben: Okay.
Emily: whatever,
Ben: at me jiu jitsu Kaisen friends fans.
Your show is mad
Emily: I think they know, I think
they know, they're aware, but,
Ben: It's adult immature.
Go watch you you Haku show like an adult
Emily: yeah, for real, man up, woman
up, them up, so, hopefully some of
these movies are, that we're going to
be talking about now are a little bit
less forgettable than Jujutsu Kaisen
Jeremy: know, we are starting, uh, we
finished just through Pride Month last
time, so we finished up ranking Scream 5.
So the next thing up is
far from mid, it is Megan.
Emily: Okay,
Jeremy: Possibly my favorite
horror movie of this last year.
Emily: that movie was really solid
and I've watched it multiple times.
Jeremy: Yeah, Megan is the sort
of horror movie that if it's
on TV I'm watching it, like.
Emily: I think that Megan
deserves to be in the top 20.
Jeremy: yeah
my, okay, my first instinct was, uh,
to start at 25, which would put it
just above Anna in the Apocalypse,
which I love, but isn't Megan.
Ben: Megan is something, you always
gotta give it to whenever James Wan is
just like, anytime we're in the movie
that's in the era of nobody is telling
James Wan no, is gonna be a good time.
Jeremy: I, James Wan and Akilah Cooper
together, so far, have made, have made
Malignant, Megan, and The Nun 2, which
I haven't seen yet, but looks good.
The first Nun was, was pretty good.
And then, like, she's also
written two of the best episodes
of Star Trek Strange New Worlds.
So like,
Ben: Oh shit, which episodes
of Strangely Worlds did
she do?
Jeremy: so Akilah Cooper wrote
both of the, like, doctor centered
episodes from the first season
about him and his daughter.
Ben: hell yeah, M'Benga.
M'Benga
Jeremy: Yep,
the, yeah, the M'Benga episode
where you find out about his
daughter being in the teleporter,
Ben: episodes, more like M'Benga episodes.
Jeremy: yeah, and then the fantasy,
the world of everything turns into a
fantasy world on the, on the Enterprise.
Ben: Oh, Fantasy World on
Enterprise was fucking great,
Stranger Than Worlds is awesome.
Jeremy: Yeah.
It is,
Ben: Alright, Megan though, okay.
Jeremy: So, yeah, Megan, so Emily
said top 20, which would mean right
now placing it above Evil Dead 2.
How do we feel about that?
Emily: No, I think it goes right between
Ready or Not and Jennifer's Body.
So I think I like it more
than Jennifer's body.
But not more than ready or not, but I can
also be convinced, but definitely not, I
don't like it more than evil dad or sissy.
Jeremy: Yeah, I mean, I just said
I thought it was my favorite horror
movie of 2022, and Sissy is sitting
right up there too, which, like, I
also really, really, really like Sissy.
Ben: Megan was super fun, but Sissy is
that absolutely visceral feel that really
only the best of horror movies can evoke.
Emily: Yes.
Jeremy: Yeah, and Sissy is gay,
whereas Megan is just for the gays.
Emily: Yes.
Correct.
Ben: and I do think there's something to
be, an element of like, Everything about
Megan is super fun, but, hell, we've seen
animatronic horror before, we've seen
doll murder horror before we've seen,
hell, we've seen, we saw malignant, so
we've even seen unhinged crazy pants,
like, filmmaking before, whereas Sissy
really did find a whole angle and
viewpoint that we haven't seen before.
So I feel like Sissy gets credit
has gotta get credit for just how
original an approach it was to
horror, and the slasher specifically.
Jeremy: In a way that really makes you,
like, root for the killer, even as they
are doing horrible, unforgivable things.
Ben: Hundred percent!
Jeremy: Murdering completely
innocent people, in some cases.
But still, you're
Ben: It still felt like
a happy ending, though.
Emily: Yeah, it felt satisfying, for sure.
But yeah, Megan, the movie we
have not ranked yet so far is,
Ben: somewhere between Sissy
and Anna and the Apocalypse.
Emily: I,
Jeremy: I think that's absolutely right.
I would put it, I think,
just above Ready or Not.
Which, again, has an ending that,
where everybody dies horribly, but
is still somehow a happy ending.
Emily: yes.
Ben: I'll go with that.
I'll agree with that.
Jeremy: I'd put it at 22 right now, right?
Between Sissy and Ready or Not.
Emily: sounds a good,
Ben: I think you have to give Megan
credit for being one of the few
movies where from really almost the
beginning to the end, you can point
to the main character and yell at
the screen, Why aren't you in jail?
Please go to jail.
Emily: But, you know,
support women's wrongs.
Jeremy: Now that, that brings us to,
uh, when I believe we watched this
one, I want to say this was for Ben's
birthday, we watched Hocus Pocus.
Ben: Yeah!
Emily: yeah,
Ben: I put a spell on you, motherfuckers!
Emily: so here's now I'm, I'm
scrolling down a little bit
Jeremy: Well, this is going to be a
recurring thing for a couple of the next
few that we're coming to which is Does
it matter how much fun it is on this
list compared to how good it actually
is because Hocus Pocus not great in a
like objective sense, but so much fun
Ben: worst child acting I've
ever seen, the actual main
character is fucking nothing,
Emily: yeah.
Ben: and also, I will never forgive
it for the name Thackeray Binks.
Emily: that, yeah,
Jeremy: Both of the male Like boy leads
the kid that plays Thackery and the the
main boy are just they're just awful And
Ben: also cannot tell you how upsetting
it is watching this cat whose face
is CGI'd slightly off to movement
to the rest of the cat's body.
Emily: Yeah, although the actual cat
actor is fantastic, like, they did a
really good job of, like, being able to
film a cat, which is not easy for film.
Jeremy: And you gotta
feel bad for all these
Ben: I'm really
Jeremy: even like, the girl love
interest is fine, she's not great, but
like, she's acting against Tiny Thor or
Birch, who is head and
shoulders above everybody
Emily: Yeah.
Yeah.
Ben: so tiny and towers above everyone.
I mean, look, this is like
almost Drag Queen Story Hour,
the movie, with those witches.
Emily: so I'm looking
at the 75 to 80 area.
Jeremy: I was starting, I wanna start
looking at 100, which currently is
the movie that's been our bar for a
lot of movies, which is Near Dark.
Do we feel like it's better
or worse than Near Dark?
Ben: I think so.
Emily: I
Jeremy: It is, I feel like it is
better or worse than Near Dark.
Emily: It is better
I like it more.
Yeah.
Like, do I like it more
than event horizon?
Absolutely not.
Do I like it more than near dark?
It's definitely more re
watchable than near dark.
Jeremy: Weirdly, I think it's of a similar
quality to Event Horizon, honestly.
Emily: Yeah.
Kind of.
They're basically the same movie
Ben: They do kind of evoke the same, like,
junk food movie feel.
Emily: Yeah, yeah.
So,
Ben: this is Watching either Event
Horizon or Hocus Pocus feels like the
cinematic equivalent to just, like,
a dinner of chips, candy, and soda.
Emily: Yeah.
I
Jeremy: Yeah, I mean, Event
Horizon has a blood orgy, and
Hocus Pocus has a dance a thon.
Like, it's basically the same thing.
I
Emily: event horizon is hocus pocus, but
if it was in space and there was a chaos
dimension and the witches were Sam Neill
Jeremy: mean, if you split Sam
Neill's performance into three
performances, you basically have the
Kathy Najimy and Bette Midler and,
Ben: so, here's the thing,
Emily: the full version of
lost version of event horizon
with the musical number in it.
Like.
Ben: this is the, this is the, metric
that I think I'm judging it with, that I
think could give Event Horizon the win, is
Hocus Pocus was trying to make me laugh.
Event Horizon was not trying to make
me laugh at all, and yet, I laughed
so much more watching Event Horizon.
Emily: I think, I think Event
Horizon is accepting of the laughter.
I think Event Horizon isn't necessarily
trying not to make you laugh.
It's just not, like, the
main objective, right?
But they're like, this is a, this
is a feature, not a bug of, I mean,
this is Paul W's Anderson, I believe.
Jeremy: yes.
Ben: Oh, it is.
I mean, that does explain why we
have, like, a man shooting out of
nowhere going, You let me burn!
Emily: no, like
Ben: Gabriel burn!
Jeremy: but what if the thing
driving Sam Neill crazy in Event
Horizon was Bette Midler as a witch?
Like
Emily: It
Ben: that would've been
great.
Emily: it?
Jeremy: Yeah, like, what if
that's what actually was,
was the, the bad guy of Event
Ben: Man, yeah, imagine, like, you take
the spaceship out to Event Horizon, and
it's like, we found hell in space, and
oh no, the Sanderson sisters are here.
They're
Emily: my
Jeremy: sisters escaped from space hell.
Ben: It's, what if it's Jason X?
Emily: they, Disney,
Jeremy: with the Sanderson
Ben: Oh, I cannot
Jeremy: Hocus Pocus
Ben: X.
Emily: I'm, I'm, positing Pocus
Pocus 3, Event Horizon, In
Space, Pocus Pocus Bloodlines.
Ben: Now, having never seen it,
can we rank Jason X as number one?
Emily: No,
Jeremy: among, among
Friday the 13th movies.
I would.
Ben: Oh, I'm so excited
to do Jason in space.
I know it's not even on the calendar,
but inevitably, eventually we will
do it, and I will revel in that day.
Emily: should do really bad sequels
to classic horror In Space, like
we should do Hellraiser Bloodlines.
Ben: Yes.
Jeremy: You
Ben: I always struggle with
calling I always struggle
Jeremy: in space, and Hellraiser
bloodlines, and Jason X, and
Ben: I know he's a classic horror icon,
but I always really question calling
Friday the 13th a classic horror movie.
Emily: Franchise, okay?
We can say franchise.
Ben: I'm all, like, whenever people are
like, Yeah, we got, like, Halloween,
and Nightmare on Elm Street, and Scream,
and Friday the 13th, I'm like, Mm,
one of these is not like the others.
Emily: that's
Ben: One of these is noticeably worse.
Emily: sometimes trees grow from really
bad little sticks into mighty oaks.
Ben: Oh, once they got the machete
and the hockey mask, it was over.
That's just killer.
That's just the power of
branding and good character
Jeremy: And it didn't happen until three,
which is arguably the, I mean, it's, it's
easily the worst one that has Jason in it.
Ben: Imagine if you had to wait four
movies for Freddy Krueger to show
up with knife, with a knife glove.
Emily: I mean, he still has the
like, bendy arms that one time.
Jeremy: it's the vision of, a
real, a real great filmmaker.
Yeah.
I mean, cause, cause Friday the 13th,
it's like, he's not in the first one
until he grabs her at the very end.
the
second one, he's just
wearing a bag on his head.
Ben: honestly, I, that's the one
thing I give that movie credit for.
That fucking little kid tree, like,
little Jason jumping out of the
lake, all time great jump scare that
the movie then completely fucking
squanders by not actually ending there.
Emily: Yeah, I mean,
it's not a good movie.
Ben: No!
Anyway, this movie is good.
Emily: The following, are we
still talking about Hocus Pocus.
Ben: I, I would put it between
Event Horizon and Near Dark.
Emily: let's do it.
Let's do
Jeremy: think that's interesting.
And it puts it just below
our devil man films as well.
Ben: That checks out, yeah,
that, that feels right.
Emily: That
Jeremy: devil man, Hocus
Pocus, Event Horizon, all sort
of in the same spot there.
Emily: And near dark.
Jeremy: Yeah.
Oh
Ben: Man, this is one
hell of a Justice League.
Devilman, The Sanderson Sisters,
and fuckin vampire Adrian
Pastar.
Jeremy: speaking of a movie that I
have ranked at five stars, but I am
willing to admit, is not a great film.
They live.
Emily: I'm
Jeremy: Hey David, Rowdy Roddy Piper.
Ben: No, that is a thousand
percent a five star movie.
Emily: It is absolutely 5 stars.
Also, it is the reason that
we have Shepard Fairey.
So I'm looking in, like, the
70s here, like, my, anchor point
for They Live is child's play.
I like it much more than child's play.
Do I like it more than
Ben: than
Jeremy: I like it more than Saloom.
Ben: Yeah.
Yeah.
Jeremy: first thing that really gives
me pause is at 71 we have Scream 5.
Emily: We do?
Jeremy: yeah, just, just known as Scream.
Emily: Oh, right, after the, Yeah,
Ben: Which, I'd say was so dumb,
but the movie addressed all
of those points in the movie.
Jeremy: yeah.
Yeah, and then, you know, just above
that is the original scream in The Mummy.
Again, The Mummy is pretty dumb in its
own right, but like, it leans into it,
much like They Live does.
Ben: I really love They Live,
but honestly, it's like Umami is
as much a wall as Scream 5 is.
Emily: So, here's the thing.
Shape of Water, are we going to Place
They Live above this Oscar winning
Jeremy: I am absolutely going
Emily: ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Ben: Yeah, oh yeah,
Jeremy: Without hesitation, I am much
more hesitant about it going above Queen
of Black Magic than I am The Shape of
Water.
Emily: Okay.
That's, that's fair.
I mean, honestly, I'm kind of,
I'm kind of with you there.
Jeremy: don't get me wrong, I do really
appreciate Guillermo del Toro's version
of Amelie, where, you know, it involves
fucking a fish man, but like Um,
Ben: Aquaman.
Fucking a fish man.
Emily: I thought it was Guillermo del
Toro's fan fiction about Abraham Sapien.
I
Ben: He really
Emily: one thing we can do,
we can say about They Live is
that it is pretty to the point.
Like, we know what the, the goal was
in that film, and they achieved it.
As opposed to, like, The Shape of Water,
which is like, yes, she fucked a fish man.
Delicious.
Jeremy: I would say below the mummy I
Ben: That, that was the second thing that
Jeremy: or below scream.
Ben: that, uh, Black Phillip
was gonna tell Anya Taylor Joy.
You can live deliciously, have
butter, and fuck fish men.
Emily: Oh yeah,
Ben: Those are the two things if
you sell yourself to the devil.
Emily: it was all that, the
rest of it was in the book.
Like, huge, but you know, he had
to keep his pitch late short.
Ben: I mean, let it not be said that
Hellboy to the Golden Army isn't mostly
also a romance movie starring a Phish dude
Emily: Yeah,
Ben: by Doug Jones.
Emily: yeah, and then, didn't, is he
still David Hyde Pierce in that movie?
The, the
Ben: And Hellboy two.
It's just, it's all Doug Jones.
Emily: As the voice as well?
Oh, well, I don't, that's kinda, I
Ben: David, I Pierce
only did the first movie,
Emily: Yeah, I mean he's fine,
but like, he's not Judge Jones.
Ben: you know?
Exactly.
Which is why with the second one
he was like, yo fucking need me.
Just let Doug Jones don just
Emily: Exactly!
Ben: do it all.
Emily: Yeah, exactly.
I
Jeremy: went a little porky
pig there for a minute,
Ben: I sure did.
I didn't like it.
Emily: I think it's great.
Ben: You're great.
Emily: thanks.
Uh, Scream 5, 5 Crames is better
made movie than they live.
Jeremy: question.
Ben: But they live does have that
six minute fight scene of Rowdy
Roddy Piper and keep David fighting
that adds Nothing to the plot.
Emily: okay, yeah,
Jeremy: for the soul of that film.
Ben: Yeah, I mean, yeah, I mean that
that I mean and I say that as the
biggest fucking positive Possible.
Emily: let's, yeah, okay, between
Scream 5 Crames and money, money, mummy,
Jeremy: It's so
mummy, baby.
It's so mummy and you don't
Emily: So mummy, I'm gonna
Ben: I like that
Emily: make that mummy rain.
Ben: I like that.
I'm also okay with there being more
movies in between Scream and Scream 5.
Emily: Yes.
Jeremy: Yeah, we got a real
question on that one coming up soon.
Uh, now, the next one we
Ben: Scream 6 is just better.
It's just be like, I like Scream
5, but Scream 6 is just way better.
Jeremy: we did get a chance to
talk about one of our, I would
say all timers, Shaun of the Dead.
Ben: Oh, hell yeah, hell yeah, hell yeah.
Okay.
Jeremy: As horror comedies go,
it is definitely near the top.
Emily: It is definitely
above Jennifer's body.
Jeremy: well yeah, I was gonna say
it is, as far as horror comedies go,
it is in hot contention with Evil
Dead 2, which is currently at number
20, would we say above or below
Ben: I would have to
honestly say above it.
Emily: I would also say above
it, and that would also bring it
above House and Psycho Gorman.
Ben: I agree.
I would put it between the
menu and Psycho Gorman.
Jeremy: so, House is the, going down
to 20, Psychogormon to 19 so yeah,
that puts it up against the menu.
Do we like the menu better
than we like Shalmuth Dead?
Emily: No.
Actually, I like Shaun of the
Dead much better than the menu.
Shaun of the Dead is rewatchable, and
Jeremy: the menu a lot, but
I, I would agree with that.
Ben: Okay.
Yeah.
So we're saying Shaun of the Dead between
Promising Young Woman and the menu.
Jeremy: I think I gotta go
above Promising Young Woman.
Emily: I think I gotta go above Rocky
Horror Picture Show for Shaun of the Dead.
Ben: I, if we're going that high, I would
honestly put it above ooh, I'm debating.
Mayhem's a tough one.
I do love mayhem,
Emily: Actually, I think if we,
if we get it nestled in right
after Night of the Living Dead, I
Ben: yeah, I think
that's
Emily: It's
poetic.
Ben: I think it's between nope.
Yeah.
I think it's between nope
and Night of the Living Dead.
Jeremy: I love Mason Bitt,
and I love Mayhem, but I think
Mayhem is heavily influenced by
Shaun of the
Ben: And that's it, exactly.
Like, yeah, we, you have to acknowledge
that, like, hell, Shaun of the Dead
was the most influential horror comedy
since Evil Dead 2, and honestly, at
this point, probably even more so.
Emily: Yeah.
Absolutely
Jeremy: And we, we don't want, like,
we're not any higher than that.
We don't like it better
than Nope, which is at
Ben: I have trouble, I have
trouble putting it above,
like, Nope and Train to Busan.
Emily: Yeah, no.
Like, nope.
I love Shaun of the Dead.
I can watch it a lot more now these
days because the Simon Pegg crying
doesn't really, like, gut me as
much as it used to just because I'm,
Jeremy: We
don't care.
We
Ben: Just
Emily: I don't care about Simon
Ben: immune to the tears of British men!
Emily: Yeah, I mean, that's basically
what I've been doing, and you know,
denying one, if I deny all British
men, I have to deny Simon Pegg as well
that's the Flight of Dragons rules
have you seen that yet, by the way?
Either of you?
Jeremy: Nope.
Ben: Is that when they launch
the queen out of the catapult?
At the end of the funeral procession?
Emily: That'd be cool.
Ben: How cool would that have been?
And now as one final show of the British
Empire, we launch a queen in a colony.
Emily: God save
Jeremy: Wherever she lands,
that's our new colony.
Emily: There shall she be buried.
Ben: At one point, that's kind of
what Britain's foreign policy was.
Just throw, just fucking throw a
dart at a map, that's ours now.
Emily: Yeah, that's true.
So,
Jeremy: So that, yeah, so that,
that puts that right up there.
I believe at number 11
was what we settled on.
Ben: Yep, yep, that feels right.
Jeremy: 12, because, uh, Night of the
Loving Dead is it got bumped to 11 by no.
Emily: right.
Ben: Yes.
Jeremy: yeah, so that is right there.
So, yeah, that was some, that month we,
we got some all timers in there between,
that and Megan and, and all that.
Ben: Well, we had fun that month.
Jeremy: Then we moved on to
Hispanic Heritage Month, and boy,
Ben: Oh, we stopped having fun.
Emily: Yeah, this is not fun.
Jeremy: Ben, I still don't think
you've seen The Skin I Live
Ben: No, and I don't think I ever will,
based on what you've told me about it.
Emily: Don't.
It's not, it's upsetting and like,
it's not like the same kind of
like, hereditary is like upsetting
in a way that is like horror,
like it's horror.
It's like fantasy horror.
Ben: we got four very upsetting movies to
get through before we got Shin Godzilla.
Emily: Yeah.
Jeremy: Yeah.
Emily: Yeah.
Jeremy: So, I mean, I do think The
Skin I Live In is a very well made
movie, and you certainly can't
say that nothing happens in it.
That's,
Emily: Yeah
so above Alien 3 because Alien
3 is kind of well made, not
a lot happens above Scream 4,
Jeremy: where am I?
What number is that?
Emily: According to my list
it's 84, but I, I had, my list
isn't updating right now, so,
Jeremy: okay, so, screen four is currently
at
Ben: that page!
Jeremy: I don't know As much as I have
a lot of feelings about this movie
Ben: I don't.
Jeremy: I, I do think
it is very well made.
Pedro Almodovar is a great filmmaker.
There's a lot of really
good performances in this.
I don't want to put it above Ginger Snaps,
but I think above Scream 4 is probably.
Emily: Okay,
Ben: That's fair.
Scream 4 is not one of the Scream
movies I feel super strongly about.
By which I mean 1, 3, and 6.
Emily: yeah, the skin I live in has
a lot going on, and yeah, that's it.
Jeremy: Yeah.
Ben: Next, rec!
Emily: Rek, riggity, riggity,
Jeremy: the most fun of
the ones we watched during
Ben: It was not very fun!
Emily: It was more fun than these other
Jeremy: it is a wild zombie film.
Ben: It is wild.
Emily: I think we're in sort of
that 60s to 70s area with Rek.
Ben: I enjoy when it becomes a
Resident Evil boss at the end.
And then you get the game over screen.
Emily: yeah, you died.
That's Dark Souls, but
you know what I mean.
Um, do we like Rek more
than we like Alien 3?
Jeremy: I do.
Ben: Yeah.
Yeah.
Emily: More than Scream 4?
Jeremy: yeah,
Emily: More than Skin I Live In.
Jeremy: yeah.
Emily: Okay.
Jeremy: I was thinking about
Ben: I would have trouble putting
Wreck above Crimes of the Future.
Emily: Okay,
Jeremy: I was thinking about
Saw, which is, is sort of
similarly gruesome to Wreck.
And I think was a little more inventive.
Like Wreck, Wreck does some good sort of.
Found footage stuff,
but yeah, I think it's
Ben: I mean, even
Jeremy: movie.
Ben: I mean, do you like Wreck
more than The Skin I Live?
Emily: Yes,
Jeremy: Yeah.
Emily: I
Ben: More than Ginger Snaps?
Jeremy: I think it's it's
more even than gingersnaps.
I love gingersnaps a
lot Largely because of
elements of gingersnaps aren't
necessarily about how well it's made
Ben: so I think on either
side of You're Next.
Emily: I think it's between
Ginger Snaps and You're Next.
Ben: yeah, I'm down for
Jeremy: Okay,
Emily: Yeah, because I like You're
Next a little bit better than Wreck.
Jeremy: Yeah, they have
Ben: Reason has prevailed!
Emily: All right, we have so far, peace.
Jeremy: now.
Let's talk about Piggy
Ben: oh boy, this one was
a motherfucker of a movie.
Emily: So this movie was intense.
It wasn't terrible.
Jeremy: I did not enjoy this film.
Ben: it had a lot going on and
I didn't really like any of it.
Emily: where, so I'm putting, I'm
Ben: It's a well made movie, I
mean, it's, you're supposed to feel
uncomfortable and bad, it's succeeding
at the emotions it wants to instill.
Emily: yeah.
And I think it has a decent like,
Jeremy: think automatically like that
line at the very least puts it above
Knock at the Cabin, which is 130,
Emily: Oh, you're going way down.
Ben: Oh, most definitely.
Emily: Yeah, no, I
think it's better than Helbent.
Ben: Oh, most absolutely.
Emily: I think it's better than Rockula.
Jeremy: I mean, I would absolutely
watch Rockula a hundred more times
before I would watch Piggy once again.
I know
Emily: mean, it's a different thing.
Ben: Pinky is definitely
a better made movie.
Emily: I think, okay, hear me out.
Jeremy: I'm hearing.
Emily: I think Piggy goes
between Kronos and Teton.
Ben: No I, I feel like Titan, I
feel like cause they're both eq
Like, very upsetting, but I do
feel like Titan was a better movie.
Even if more indecipherable.
Emily: Okay.
Jeremy: I mean, I, it's
that'd be pretty, I feel like.
We've got Videodrone, Hunger, and
Invitation here, all of which have
a similar degree of discomfort
or disappointment, I feel like.
But Videodrone and Invitation, discomfort.
Hunger, you know, moderate disappointment
in what that movie ends up being.
Emily: I will say that first scene of The
Hunger, like the first eight minutes or
whatever of The Hunger are worth watching.
Like, I think that that is a better movie.
Ben: I like it when Susan
Sarandon killed all the monkeys.
Emily: I didn't, but that's just me.
Ben: Fine, I guess I'm the asshole then!
Jeremy: I liked it when the
vampires had sex by laying in
cross positions on the bed.
I don't know how that worked, but That was
Emily: they were, they were
taking the cross back.
They're
Jeremy: They were laying
perpendicular to each other.
Emily: Haven't you ever
done it cross style?
Sorry, it's only
Jeremy: That's how you
make vampires go, not come.
Emily: Yeah.
Well, they're taking it back.
That's how they take it back.
Ben: I, where do y'all fall on the
debate over whether or not vampire
fangs have little straws in them?
Emily: So, yeah, I, when I first thought
about vampires, like when they talk about
sucking your bug, sucking your blood and,
you know, the fangs would go in there.
So when I was little, I thought
Ben: They're sucking your bud!
Good for your bud!
Emily: Man, no.
If only vampires could suck bud.
I'd be a vampire if it
was about sucking blood.
But that would mean, like,
I mean, I don't know.
We'll see.
Maybe, maybe blood is
like bud to vampires.
But for real though, I used
to think that vampires would
suck blood through the teeth
when I was little, because, like,
why else, like, have the bite
apparatus so, like, because there's
the two puncture wounds, right?
But no, they lick it up.
Like, then I realized, like, oh, they
just, they just lick it up, or they just
Ben: I kinda like the idea that
there's this pump system in the teeth.
Emily: Yeah, well, and then I like learned
about snakes and how snakes have holes in
their teeth, but they, that doesn't suck
in, it goes out because it's the venom.
Ben: Well I like it
cause then it's like, oh.
Cause honestly, as bad as the sunlight
is, the whole not being able to eat
human foods again, I'm like, Oh,
that's, that's as shitty as no sunlight.
Emily: Yeah, no,
Ben: Imagine only blood?
Fuck that noise.
Emily: yeah, that's pretty,
that's pretty rough.
Also, we're getting a serious horror
movie outside right now in California.
Like, I can hear the, I can hear
the rain through my headphones.
Jeremy: Yeah, so, all the sucking
in Piggy is not of the Dracula kind,
Emily: let's put
Jeremy: that suck.
Emily: right below the hunger.
Ben: I'm good with that.
Emily: Okay.
I mean, I would argue that it would, I,
I, well, I have made my argument about
Ben: I would have to remember enough of
the invi I would have to remember more of
the invitation to argue for it anywhere.
I know
Jeremy: like,
Ben: it.
Jeremy: I, think I like the invitation
better, but not, like, strongly.
I just dislike Piggy pretty strong.
So, yeah, that's fine,
uh, that'll put it at 1.
11 for
Ben: I do definitely agree with you that
Rocula is the far more enjoyable movie.
And if someone was like,
hey, you wanna watch Piggy or
Rocula, not a hard decision.
Emily: yeah, I mean, yeah, but like, it's,
Jeremy: I mean, now we have sort
of the, the inverse of that, which
is still an uncomfortable movie,
but an incredible uncomfortable
movie in 2020 is the invisible man.
Emily: yes.
So I think that one's gonna be up.
Do we like the invisible
man more than Midsommar?
Ben: Yes.
Yes.
Oh my god, absolutely.
Emily: More than velvet buzzsaw.
Ben: Yes.
Emily: Okay, more than malignant.
Jeremy: Yeah.
Ben: Man is de I do truly love
Malignant, but Invisible Man is
without a doubt the better movie.
Emily: Okay,
Jeremy: Yeah.
The first thing that I start to feel
any sort of way of putting it up
against is it follows, which is another
story about an invisible monster.
But, I don't, they're,
they're both very good.
Ben: Is it better or
worse than Ex Machina?
Emily: No, it is not better.
Jeremy: that's, that's tough for me.
Cause I, I like it better than Hereditary,
which is just above Ex Machina.
Emily: yeah, I mean I do too.
Shit.
I mean I could be at peace with it being
above hereditary, cause like, I don't
like it better than Pan's Labyrinth or
Hellraiser 2022, but I think in terms
of quality and what it's saying and
the performances and everything, this
is a pretty good, pretty good movie.
Jeremy: yeah.
Ben: Let's play Fantastic.
Emily: remembering it as much because
it was between, like, a really favorite
movie of mine and then a really upsetting
movie that it was just like, I can't
unsee anything that I saw on piggy
Ben: Do we want to put it
between Aliens and Hereditary?
Emily: Yeah, let's do that.
Jeremy: that works for me.
I can do that.
And that of course leads to a
very favorite movie of yours,
Emily, which is Shin Godzilla.
Ben: Yeah!
Emily: so, I think Shin Godzilla is up
I would put it between Mayhem and Bitch.
Ben: So where is the original Godzilla?
Emily: It's much lower,
Jeremy: that's gonna
be a tough one for me.
Ben: Either way, Shin Godzilla, good
Emily: Oh, so it's, uh, regular
Godzilla is number 58 behind Host Shin
Godzilla, I think, is way up there.
I think Shin Godzilla is, like
Yeah, I would, I would say
Mayhem is a little bit more fun.
bUt I definitely think Godzilla
has more to say than, than
the Rock Your Picture Show.
And I think it's, it's a little bit
more of a iconic movie than bit.
Ben: I'd agree with that.
I'd agree between Mayhem and B.
E.
T.
Emily: Yeah,
Jeremy: I really like Bit.
That's the
Emily: I do too.
Ben: But Shin Godzilla is, honestly,
the best Godzilla movie I've ever seen.
Emily: Yeah.
I mean, it's a, it's like an actual movie.
Jeremy: Yeah.
I mean, there are a lot of men in suits
moving from one room to the next room.
Ben: Also, the whole, ending of like,
Little Frozen, like, Godzilla, Full Metal
Alchemist, Homunculus Army things, just
butting out of the Godzilla tail, like,
that's one of the creepiest images I've,
like, that stuck with me for a while now,
like, I re I really like Shin Godzilla.
Emily: Yeah.
Ben: Also, it gave us, like,
Kyoko and Patterson, so that's got
to net a few.
Yeah, like that's gotta get shooted
up the ranks all on her own.
She's gonna be the president in her 40s.
Emily: Yeah, she, she got a
lawyer degree at Harvard or
Ben: She's the third generation mechanism.
Emily: She is the third
generation mechanism.
Jeremy: All right.
Well, if both of you guys want to go
above bit, then I will put it up there.
Ben: Yeah, I just feel like it, it
handled the monster stuff, the satire.
It just had so much to say.
Emily: Yeah,
Ben: And I feel like Mayhem also
had a lot to say, and it's Right, I
mean, Bit They all have a lot to say,
but Shin Godzilla had a lot to say.
Emily: yeah,
Ben: That's not to take away
from everything Bit had to say.
Jeremy: yeah.
Ben: had a lot to say.
Bit is a ve Okay, Bits
is a very good movie.
Emily: That's a very good movie, but
I feel like in terms of like cinema,
Ben: Yeah,
Godzilla.
Jeremy: Not all cats cinema.
Uh,
Emily: cinema.
All right.
So if that's where we're
putting Shin Gojira.
Scravy, Scream 6.
I
Jeremy: do we, you haven't watched it yet?
Emily: No, so I have, I have caught up
by now, and I watched it, and I liked it.
Do I like it more than
the original Scream?
No.
Jeremy: I do.
Emily: Okay.
Jeremy: tell you that for,
I'll tell you that for free.
Emily: Okay.
Ben: Maybe it's the New
York biases in me, but yeah.
Emily: I mean, you all got to talk
about it more than I did, so, like,
I, my experience is probably a little
Ben: Maybe it's the recency bias,
but yeah, I really like Scream 6.
Emily: Yeah, well, I mean, I think
it was a, it was a fine movie.
Jeremy: would say Scream 6 is, is probably
one of my favorite slasher movies.
Period.
Ben: I'm I'm really with you there.
I mean, again, I've talked about
What I'd like to see from like urban
horror and this movie kind of did
everything I'd want to see from
like Slasher to takes Manhattan.
Emily: Do you do you like
it more than Hereditary?
Do you think it's better than
Ben: No, I don't think
it's better than hereditary
Emily: Do you think it's
better than Ex Machina?
Okay.
Jeremy: so here's what I was thinking
is, okay, so Scream 1 is at 72.
I would put it above that,
and I'd definitely put it
above Hellraiser 2 as well.
I would put it above Halloween,
which is currently at 68.
Emily: Yeah.
Ben: I think it's hard candy that
I started to run into trouble.
Jeremy: I don't really have trouble
putting it above Hard Candy or Dracula.
Ben: I'd maybe put it
Jeremy: is at 56, and I, Like,
I still maintain that Descent is
one of just the like, most raw,
scary movies I've ever seen.
Ben: oh, yeah
Emily: Yeah.
Ben: I I would be okay putting scream
6 between the descent and midsommar
Emily: Okay.
Jeremy: I'd be good with that too.
Emily: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Ben: RANKING!
We
Emily: did it.
We did it again, fam.
Ben: did it!
It's objective!
If you disagree with what movie we
say is better, And, again, the only
true measure of judgement, Betterness.
And if you disagree, you're wrong.
Jeremy: hmm.
Emily: Can't argue with that.
Jeremy: Yeah,
Ben: hmm.
Jeremy: naturally.
Emily, you have not had a chance
to talk about Evil Dead Rise.
You just watched it.
how are you feeling about it?
Emily: I was disappointed.
Ben: I did not love this movie.
Emily: I, there was a lot of things
that I did like, but I feel like
the thing that I really give a shit
about in the Evil Dead franchise
is, sadly, for me, Bruce Campbell.
Like, that, Bruce Campbell was peak
in Evil Dead 2 Army of Darkness,
of course, was Fantastic film.
I don't think any amount of edibles
would have made Evil Dead Rise
Ben: Yeah.
I don't
Jeremy: would have
been disastrous.
Ben: I don't
think it
needs Bruce Campbell, Specifically, but
It needs to be a horror comedy to be Evil
Dead, like, if they did, hey, we're doing
a new Evil Dead movie, it's gonna star
Caitlin Olsen, from It's Always Sunny in
Philadelphia, I would be like, holy shit,
Emily: yeah, it wasn't quite funny enough.
And I also like really
was invested in the family
Jeremy: That's a
Emily: it just,
Jeremy: to really be invested in
Ben: oh yeah, they fucking die,
Emily: exactly.
Jeremy: I talked about this when we
talked about it, is that I feel like
the way in which it is an Evil Dead
movie is obviously it's not funny,
uh, with a few exceptions, but it is
at 11 for a good chunk of the movie.
Like, it is like, there are things
that in any other movie you would
be like, no, that is too far.
That is over the top.
I can't, I can't handle that.
And in this movie, it's like, yeah,
but what if not only did the kids
start to turn evil, But she ate glass,
and the pieces of glass were poking
through her throat, and then she hit
her aunt with a fucking cheese grater,
and I was just like, I, I think, I
think, as I said, that was the point
in watching the movie, that I was like,
okay, like, this is what we're doing.
We've,
we've really, we really committed to
Ben: to me it's like when they had the
scene of like, she eats out a guy's
eyeball and then spits the eyeball into
another guy's mouth and he chokes
on it, That was really the
only moment of the film where
I'm like, This is Evil Dead.
Emily: Yeah.
Yeah.
Like, there, I felt like it wasn't,
it didn't quite commit to the 11,
like it was 11 in places, which
kind of felt misplaced to me.
Like, it felt a little bit messy.
And
Ben: It was like an hour and fifteen
until the first blood splatter.
That's unacceptable.
Emily: the most killable character in
this movie did not die in the best way.
And I'm really sad about that.
Like, the fucking drone kid in the
very beginning should have been,
like, his, his scalp should have been
eaten off and, like, he should have
been, like, I don't know, like, they
rip him in half and then, yeah, I wanted
him to take the drone to the face.
You kidding me?
Like, if she got the drone to the face,
then he gets the drone to the face.
It's equal rights.
Jeremy: Yeah, see, for me, it, with
this movie, it's all about Alyssa
Sutherland, like, as the mom in
this, she, she plays demonic at,
like, a level that I have almost never
seen in movies, like, it's, like, she
is Committed and, like, moving this
movie forward just, like, on her back
in a way that, like, short of, like,
The Exorcist, there are a few movies
that, like, Possession really plays
this well, like, because that, that,
that, I talked about it before, that
part where she, like, looks up over
the edge of the bath and says, Mommy's
with the maggots now, like, it's
Ben: Oh yeah, that's
Jeremy: so chilling.
Emily: I, yeah, like, I,
Ben: I love the Deadites.
Emily: the Deadites are fun, but I
feel like it should have been more fun.
Like, it should have been more fun.
And I think they should have,
like, picked on different people.
Cause I, I don't know.
Like, I
Jeremy: You just wanted more, you
wanted more people to, for them to cull,
Emily: Yeah,
Jeremy: deaths.
Emily: Yeah, like, I wanted to
see that family, like, get through
it with the power of their,
like, sheer punk rocked ness,
Jeremy: I admire them not doing that.
There are a lot of movies, like
Hereditary, where when you kill the
cute little kid, I'm like, oh no, why?
Why
do we do this?
And this one I was just like No, like,
the teenage girl, like, gets to get in on
the being an evil demon, which is, like,
Ben: That's
progress.
Jeremy: do it.
Emily: I mean, that is, but, like, I
wish they were less, like, and then
they were kind of looking at the family
portraits and stuff, and I'm like, no,
they should, if they're gonna revel in
it, they should revel in it, like, that's
the thing about the, the, the demons.
I don't know, like, I feel like they were
trying to be a little bit too wistful
with the, the family, and then it made
me care about them more instead of just
having fun watching them become, like,
fun deadites, and like, crawl around and
be like, I might on, which they did do.
Um, so, anyway, do we put it?
Jeremy: What I'm looking at right now
is, is for me It feels a lot like Queen
of Black Magic, and the way I felt
coming out of that movie as far as it
just being brutal and violent and scary
and stuff like that, which, that's
Ben: Queen of Black Magic
did it better, though.
Emily: I think so too,
Jeremy: mean, it's okay, I don't
think there's any, like, the, the
performance that we get of, a bad
guy in Queen of Black Magic is all of
about 5 minutes at the end of the movie
Emily: but Queen of Black Magic has cool
shit going on and it's a little bit more
involved with the characters instead
of like, just fucked up shit for the
heck of it, you know, like they just
don't throw in gore because it's gory.
I would put Evil Dead Rise, I
mean, I don't like it as much
as I like Crimes of the Future
Jeremy: I like it way better
than I like Grimes of the Future.
I think this is That's largely a
question of our, our separate tastes.
I mean, I, I notably really didn't
like Graham's the future at all.
Emily: Okay.
Okay.
Ben: I definitely liked Crime
to the Future more, but in
the interest of diplomacy
Emily: yes.
And, Evil Dead Rise was a pretty,
like, it did have its moments.
Ben: Oh, yeah, like, when they all
fuse into, like, one thing with the
three heads, that's fuckin gnarly.
Emily: and they have the, the wood chipper
Jeremy: She pushes that thing
through a wood chipper and,
Emily: yeah,
Ben: if you're watching a horror
movie and a witch shipper shows up,
you know you're in for a good time.
Jeremy: the real all star, Stephanie, the
Emily: Stephanie is pretty great.
I wish Stephanie, Stephanie, I
feel like should have done more.
I wanted
Jeremy: I mean, Stephanie did impale
the older sister through the head.
Like,
Emily: That's true.
I, I didn't remember that.
Okay.
So do we like, do you,
what about gremlins?
Gremlins versus evil dead rise?
Ben: I like gremlins more, I think.
Jeremy: I, I would put it above
Gremlins, but I don't know.
That's, that's much closer to
the, the area I'm thinking.
Emily: Yeah,
Jeremy: if Saloom had been the
movie that it sort of promises
in the first 10 minutes, then
Ben: It's better than so It's
definitely better than saloom.
Jeremy: yeah,
Emily: yeah, I wouldn't,
I wouldn't put it gremlins
Ben: It's definitely better than
like rarex sports and stuff.
Emily: in terms of commitment.
Ben: I guess it's on a side I
guess it's on a side of gremlins.
I could put it I could
put it above gremlins.
Jeremy: I was looking
above Queen of Black Magic.
Emily, you're saying below Gremlins.
So Ben is in the middle there.
So we'll just.
Emily: Yeah.
Jeremy: We'll go between Queen
of Black Magic and Gremlins.
Emily: dokey.
Jeremy: that puts it currently at 79.
Ben: Nice.
Minus
Emily: yes.
Jeremy: mhm.
Emily: That's very important.
Ben: Yes.
Jeremy: Alright, now we're, we're
getting now to our, uh, stuff that, is
coming out in our episodes in November.
speaking of troubling movies, men,
Emily: Men!
Let's talk about men, baby.
I gotta, like, I think,
Ben: Coming out of other men,
Jeremy: I've seen this movie twice
and I still have no idea how I
feel
Ben: That's too many
times to watch this movie.
Emily: I've seen this movie three times.
Ben: Too many times.
Emily: Nah, it's, I like it.
But you know me, I'm like,
vibes?
Ben: no, this, is a, this is one
of those, Damn, what a really good
movie I never want to see again,
type
Emily: I think,
Jeremy: heavy for sure.
Emily: Yeah, I'm gonna put it between,
Ben: are unsettling.
Jeremy: rant.
Emily: alright, I am
going to,
Ben: vibes.
Emily: reaching for the stars, here.
I'm pointing, and I'm pointing way up.
Ben: And if you go too high, I
will drag you back down like the
Emily: fine.
Ben: that I am.
Emily: That's fine, because
this is what I'm expecting.
Let's go.
Midsummer and Scream 6.
Jeremy: ooh,
Emily: Men.
Jeremy: I was looking,
Emily: wait, is that above Annihilation?
Jeremy: maybe, uh, annihilation is
currently at 62 right above Dracula.
Do you like it more than
you like Annihilation?
They're both the same
Director.
Emily: I don't I have my quibbles
with Annihilation, but I think
Annihilation has cooler shit
going on, and it's also more like
Ben: I would definitely give, I You wanna
do between Annihilation and Dracula,
Emily: Yeah, I think I mean,
I do think that it Do you
think men Okay, yeah, alright.
You know what?
I'm
Ben: I mean in terms of who is
the greatest horror monster?
Dracula or men?
I feel like men have the
real life, higher body count.
Emily: Yeah,
Jeremy: Dracula could never.
Emily: yeah,
Ben: I know Dracula, I
know all Draculas are men.
So does that mean that
all men are draculas,
Jeremy: No.
Emily: Not all
Ben: the square rectangle type situation?
Hashtag not all men are
Emily: Are Draculas.
That's the only hashtag on
not all men that I'll accept.
It's
Jeremy: all
right.
So, So, between Annihilation and
Dracula right next to that uncomfortable
area of, of the list with hard
candy and Suspiria and Black Swan.
Emily: Yeah,
Ben: of funny how genre, how like those,
some genres tend to start bunching up.
Emily: yeah, well, it's, it's, we've
got like a weird one, like, we've got
this very weird eclectic group in our,
in the, between like 57, like, Scream
6, and then we have Midsommar, After
Midnight, Host, and then like, Godzilla,
and then Annihilation Men, Dracula,
and then Hard Candy, where it's like,
Ben: you're right, it's
a real eclectic group.
Emily: Yeah, which is,
you know, that's fine.
Ben: Yeah.
Alright, so Hellbender
Jeremy: I love this
Emily: Hellbender.
Jeremy: movie.
I,
Emily: I,
know you love the movie.
I
love it, too.
I don't know if I love it more than, like,
Annihilation,
Ben: it's a really good
mo that's the thing.
It's like, it's a really good movie,
but I don't think I love it more than
like a lot of things on this list.
Jeremy: mean, I, I love it
more than Jennifer's body.
Like we're talking like, this
is like the 25 range for me.
Emily: I
Ben: it's definitely not there
Emily: to me, Jeremy.
Jeremy: Like,
Emily: I feel like you're
trying to debate me.
Jeremy: I mean, cause like that, that area
we have at 25 right now is ready or not.
Jennifer's body.
I am ever for Christmas and
in the apocalypse aliens,
I
like hellbender better than any of
those movies.
Ben: you're putting it above Vivi.
Exm no Nightmare on Elm Street.
Girl
Emily: I can't,
Ben: at night.
Emily: I can't put it above, it's weird
too, because like, I could definitely
put it above, if I put it against Lost
Boys, I would put it above Lost Boys.
Jeremy: Well, yeah, I mean,
we have Hereditary at 32.
Like, that's not even a question
for me that I like Hellbender
better than Hereditary.
Emily: yeah, I mean, Hereditary,
Hellbender is the movie that
I wanted Hereditary to be.
Jeremy: As 2020's which movies go?
Emily: Yeah.
Jeremy: well, I guess
Hereditary's 2018, but
Ben: I definitely like it more than
Pan's Labyrinth, that's for sure.
Emily: Okay, uh,
Jeremy: 25 and 35.
Emily: yeah.
Ben: we like it more than Invisible Man?
Emily: I don't think it's, I, I don't
think it's as powerful, like, that's
the thing is that I like it more than
hereditary, but I don't think it's as
powerful as hereditary, like, it does
Ben: so between Hereditary
and Invisible Man?
Emily: I would put it between
Freaky and Ex Machina.
That's, that's my two cents.
Ben: I vibes with that.
Emily: Yeah, because, like, I
think it's, that's a good spot,
because it's definitely, like,
Jeremy: So when we're talking
about Invisible Man, I think from a
technical standpoint, that Invisible
Man Is at least, should be at
least 10 spots higher than it is,
from just a sheer technical
Perspective,
Ben: I mean, we can, do you want
to open up the Invisible Man?
Like, we can go, we can rank it up.
Like, I think there's a strong argument
to be made that it is ranked low.
Like, I could see us putting Invisible
Man, like Between Promising Young
Woman and Candyman, honestly.
Emily: I was about to say
Promising Young Woman in the menu.
Ben: Yeah, I'm down for reopening
the Invisible Man ranking and
Emily: yeah, I usually don't
want to open up rankings, but
I am definitely open to that,
because I think that,
Jeremy: putting that at
19 just above the menu
Emily: yeah,
Ben: I like that.
Jeremy: Yeah Cuz I I feel like after saw
came out James Wan took off and made like
a hundred more movies of varying quality
and like lay one L like I don't feel like
we even heard from for years and then
like he just came in and dropped this
like All timer in the invisible man in
a series of like planned movies, all of
which have been garbage up to that point.
Like, the Tom Cruise mummy, garbage.
Like,
Emily: yeah,
Jeremy: every one of these like
attempts to start a universal
monsters, the Dracula unbound, garbage.
Emily: yeah,
Jeremy: and then like, The invisible
man just sort of sneaks in there
and it's like, just destroys.
Ben: I don't know if this was ever
truly a thing considered, but at
some point someone whispered like,
Oh, what if we did the Mommy 3 co
starring Hugh Jackman's Van Helsing?
Emily: I mean, that'd be fucking
awesome, that's maybe one of those
things where it's, like, greater than
the sum of its two parts, but, we'll,
we'll see.
Ben: know,
because We had to get
Tom Cruise is the mummy.
A movie that ends with Tom
Cruise, you are the new the mummy.
Emily: So, uh, again, I'm going to
reassert my suggestion that Hellbender
goes between Freaky and Ex Machina.
Jeremy: mean, for me, I, I'm still like,
it would be up around 26 or 27 for me.
I would like to put it above hereditary.
If we can put it above
hereditary, I'm fine with that.
Emily: I don't, I can't
Ben: have tr I definitely have
trouble putting it above Aliens.
Emily: Yeah, so
Ben: I I'll give you I'll give you
Hereditary, but Aliens is gonna be a wall.
Jeremy: Yeah, because hereditary
and Hellbender are such a direct
comparison that I feel like Hereditary
is upsetting, where Hellbender is like,
it's actually doing something more
Emily: that's true.
Jeremy: to me.
Emily: That's, true,
Ben: That's true, I agree
with that.
Emily: yeah, I mean that's something
that I think it's, when, when we're
looking at this list, it's one thing
that I do value is like what the movie
is saying, and I think that's important.
So I think, yeah, if we want to do it
above hereditary, just between hereditary
and aliens I think that that works for me.
I just can't, like, yeah, I
can't in good faith put it above,
get away from her, you bitch.
Like girlbosses versus each
other like I can't can't
Jeremy: Understood.
Now, let's talk about where we
rank Donald Sutherland's naked ass.
Emily: pretty high.
Jeremy: don't look now.
Emily: I know I I will look now at
Naked Donald Sutherland, but I here
I'm like, I think that the message
of the movie is important when we're
ranking this But but I also think that I
objectify an actor is just as important
Ben: You're allowed to
objectify presidents now.
Jeremy: Ugh.
Emily: You know what?
I watched
Ben: It's timely, they're
releasing the prequel!
Emily: I am going to say something
and it's not, it doesn't ha only
has to do with Donald Sutherland.
I had forgotten that he was in
fucking Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
Jeremy: oh
yeah.
Emily: Yeah, he's The he's the,
the, movie, The film the flimm,
the, the original Buffy the Vampire
Slayer, which is really fantastic.
He is the Giles character and
the fucking vampire in that
movie, like the head vampire.
Is Rutger Hauer.
Ben: Oh my god, that's amazing.
Okay, that's How did this movie
suck so hard with that cast?
Emily: Have you seen it?
Okay, you gotta see it.
Cause you gotta really
look at it in that light.
Cause like, it is a horror comedy.
Like, it also has David Arquette.
Little baby David Arquette.
Ben: Do we?
Emily: yeah, little baby.
And he like, and it has Luke Perry.
As like the stupid, like it's basically
like Lost Boys, but if like Lost Boys
and Clueless, like, merged together, like
that's the original Buffy the Vampire
Jeremy: It really, it really leans
more into Buffy being dumb and
shallow than the show ever does.
Emily: Yeah,
Jeremy: yeah, so,
Donald Sutherland, uh, don't look now
okay, I'm gonna say it's above 100.
La Llorona is at 100 right now.
Emily: Yeah, absolutely.
Jeremy: Let's see.
75 right now is the original Scream.
Do we like it more or less
than the original Scream?
Emily: I don't think it has, I
mean, I think it's a powerful movie.
I don't think it's as powerful
as the original Scream in
terms of what it's doing.
Ben: Yeah,
I agree with that.
Jeremy: the ending of
this movie, I gotta say.
Emily: okay.
Yeah, I think I would put it maybe between
Five Creams and Shape of Water because
I think it's, maybe it's somewhere
on either side of Shape of Water, I
think, I'm gonna put, don't look now,
Jeremy: yeah, that's a tough one.
Ben: Yeah.
Jeremy: say somewhere in
that,
Ben: definitely in that more drama
y world than straight horror.
Emily: yeah, and there's not
a lot of drama y stuff in this
Ben: I mean, do, yeah, I mean, do
we like it more than They Live?
Jeremy: oh, I certainly don't.
I,
Ben: no,
I, I definitely, I agree.
They Live.
Jeremy: yeah,
Ben: I mean,
Jeremy: and I think 5 Cream, it's, I like
Ben: definitely more than Evil Dead Rise.
I'd probably rank it above
Queen of Black Magic.
Emily: Yeah, would you rank
it above Shape of Water?
Ben: Did not see shit.
Emily: Oh, that's right.
Jeremy: Shape of Water is, I don't
know, it's iffy to me, cause, I mean,
there are problems with Don't Look Now.
That can be at least written off to
some extent by it being in 1973, which,
to some extent, Shape of Water still
has the same sorts of problems in 2017.
Emily: that's why I'm thinking
above Shape of Water, because Don't
Look Now is about the same, but
like, doesn't have the advan or
doesn't
have the,
Jeremy: 50 years of experience.
Emily: yeah, the hindsight that
Shape of Water should have.
Jeremy: Yeah,
Emily: they're both about water.
Jeremy: right.
So we have one more to talk about before
we wrap this up, and that is our special
visit from, uh, our good friend Matt
Fraction to talk about Black Christmas,
Emily: Black krimbus,
Jeremy: Above the remake
of Black Rhythm, yes?
Emily: absolutely.
Ben: Holy shit, yeah.
Emily: 500%.
I mean, not, I don't, I can't say that
as, like, a, numerical ranking 500%,
but yes, it is leaps and bounds better
Ben: It's actually haunting, and
chilling, and has Margot Kidder, and,
versus the remake, with Carrie Ellis
incel cult, and no Margot Kidder.
Jeremy: Yeah.
Currently Shudder is at 100.
I think it goes above Shudder, yeah?
Emily: Oh, Yeah,
Ben: oh yeah.
Emily: Hondo percent.
Jeremy: when we're back
at, uh, Scream is at 75.
I get better than Scream?
The original Scream?
Ben: That's one of those tough ones,
because again, we're talking like, I
definitely like it more than Halloween,
Jeremy: Because we're talking about the
great great great great granddaddy of
Ben: Yeah, I think, I think for that
reason alone, like, I think what
gets it above Scream is that I rank,
is that I put it above Halloween.
Emily: Yeah.
Ben: I
don't know if it gets much higher
than that, but I definitely
rank it above Halloween.
Jeremy: would put it above
Nightmare Alley for sure.
Emily: Yeah, would you put
it above black, black fun?
Jeremy: Black Swan, Black Christmas,
Ben: I, I would put it above
Black Swan but not above Suspiria.
Emily: Okay.
I like that.
I like that a lot.
Actually.
I think I'm, I'm on board with that.
Jeremy: Alright, yeah, that can be
Emily: Yeah.
Cause I, I can't do black
Christmas above hard candy.
Ben: Yeah, no, I feel like Hard
Jeremy: such
Ben: is.
Jeremy: two movies to compare.
Emily: Yeah, yeah, but I mean, like,
in terms of the movies and how they're
made and what they're saying and the
performance and everything, like, I
can't hard candy is another 1 of those,
like barriers for me on this list.
Also the, I've just.
Notice that the thumbnail for
Hard Candy that's on Letterboxd
right now is pretty fantastic.
Jeremy: oh yeah, it's The Little
Red Riding Hood and The Bear Trap.
Yeah, yeah,
it's good.
Emily: yeah.
Jeremy: Good cover.
All right, that's it for us.
So that puts us our, our top 10 now after
three years is, Get Out, The Babadook,
The Thing, Attack the Block, Alien, Us,
Prey, Candyman, Chained Busan, and Nope.
I think Nope was the only
one that, squeaked in there.
Um,
Ben: is the only new entry in the top ten.
Jeremy: yeah, Shaun of the Dead and
Shin Godzilla both got in the top 20
as did the Invisible Man in the menu.
The menu currently rounds out the top 20.
Emily: Yeah.
Ben: Look at this fucking top 20, this is
good, this is a good top 20, holy shit.
Jeremy: yeah, now, so we're at 148.
oUr bottom 10 right now is Texas Chainsaw
Massacre, Sukobe, Friday the 13th, Knock
at the Cabin, Bad Hair, Craft Legacy,
No Face Benny, Resident Evil, Welcome
to Raccoon City, They Slash Them, Old,
and of course, still holding its spot at
the bottom of the list, Don't Breathe.
Emily: breathe.
Ben: So I think,
the, I,
is they slash, is they slash them
only new entry in our bottom ten?
Jeremy: well, Knock at the Cabin made
it
in there as well.
Ben: Oh right, yup, knockin the cabin.
It made it out of the top five,
but only just, but only just.
Emily: I love that our, M.
Night Shyamalan movies are
Ben: Shyamalan is kind of our anti Jordan.
If you look, our, so really our rankings
fall on a spectrum of Jordan Beal to M.
Night Shyamalan.
Emily: actually,
Jeremy: There's enough M.
Night Shyamalan movies that we
could do a whole month of M.
Night Shyamalan
movies.
Ben: Can we
never, can we
Emily: seen yet.
Yeah, let's, I mean, I would be down to
sort of revisit, like, why, why, why M.
Night Shyamalan in the
first place, though?
Like, we should, we should really, like,
reassess.
Ben: much worth doing.
We should do six cents,
that'd be a good one.
Emily: Yeah, we should, we should remind
Jeremy: we should do The Happening.
we should
Emily: Sigh.
Jeremy: do Signs.
Emily: Yeah, by the way, I
watched No One Will Save You.
That movie is fucking awesome.
That movie is so good.
I love that movie.
I was like, because I was, I was there
with Phoenix and he was like, this is
like what science should have been.
And I, I don't, I haven't seen
science, but I know enough about
it through Rasmuses that like,
signs, whatever science had to offer
has nothing compared to this, how
fucking terrifying and good and like,
Jeremy: The like last 15 minutes of Signs.
Is where that movie is, where no one
will save you starts like it starts at,
you know, how crazy science gets by the
Ben: I just can't get
over the water twist.
Like, aliens, did you not check?
We have so much water!
Don't come
naked!
Emily: see water.
Maybe they could just
couldn't, they can't,
Ben: master
Emily: can't see it.
It's like infrared.
Ben: ponchos?
Emily: I guess not.
In space, no one can hear you piss.
Jeremy: I was really impressed with
Kate and Caitlin Deaver in that
movie and she just, she manages to
hold that movie together for a full
hour and a half with no dialogue.
Just acting against CGI
aliens and shit, which like.
Emily: yeah,
Jeremy: So well done.
She
does such a good job.
Emily: the aliens are very standard, but
they still are like, they really lean
into, okay, let's make these standard
gray aliens as terrifying as possible.
And like, they look good, right?
And they're, yeah, it's good.
I do want to end this with, like,
what is the movie that you want, you
really, really want to cover in 2024?
Ben: So, I So as you both know, and
what I've been campaigning for a
while, and am getting, what is now
on the schedule I'm very excited for
us to talk about the PlayStation 2
third person shooter Werewolves vs.
Vampire video game coming to life that is
Underworld.
Emily: Underworld.
Ben: Starring Kate Beckinsdale
Emily: yes, good, yes.
I haven't
seen that movie in a while.
Ben: Speedman!
Emily: I,
Ben: Kate Beckinsdale.
Emily: I do want to see that movie again.
I haven't seen it since
I saw it in the theater
Jeremy: Kate, back in
sale, brutally shoved in to tight,
the tightest leather they could find.
Emily: Bless Her Heart,
Bless Her Angel Baby
Heart.
Ben: mean, Michael Sheen just
being an impossibly sexy werewolf.
Emily: Yeah.
Ben: It's a good time.
Emily: Jeremy, what's your, what's your
top movie you're looking forward to doing
Jeremy: I know we are,
we're talking about,
Emily: now?
Yeah.
Jeremy: and we're talking
about more devils right now.
We're planning to hit up a lot of, stuff
I haven't seen coming up or we're going to
be watching the fear street movies which
have been on my list for a long time.
And I have not gotten around to
I think mostly because when I
look at them, I'm like, we'll
definitely cover that at some point.
Emily: Yeah.
Yeah.
Jeremy: but, those are, are very high.
We've talked a lot about
Constantine, which we have coming up.
I'm actually really looking forward to
a couple that I shoved in here because
I was like, I just want to watch these
and I want a chance to talk about them.
I think they'll be probably coming
out in either January or March.
We're talking about, Soft
and Quiet and Skin of Merink.
Both of which look really, really
interesting and really good.
Emily: I'm not looking forward to Skin
of Merink, but I'm, I, I would love
to be proven wrong about all of my
biases.
Jeremy: Notions.
Emily: My preconceived
notions about Skin and Ring.
I just can't look at that movie
and not think about Sharon
Louisa Graham's Elephant Show.
Like, does the Elephant
Show, does it come into it?
Jeremy: I haven't seen
it, so I don't know.
I've I heard a lot of people that were
really like, had really interesting
things to say about both like, the
sort of non linear qualities of
it, but also the Weirdness of it.
I am excited.
I know we've got some,
some cool stuff coming up.
We are talking about sorry
to bother you, which has been
on our list for a long time.
And I genuinely love Tina horn is coming
back to talk about bones and all with us.
Ben: Yes, always great
having Tina on the show.
Emily: Love it.
Jeremy: sexy cannibalism is
our brand, if anything is, so,
yeah, I'm excited that
we've got some new guests.
We've got Sarah Century coming
on to talk about The Haunting,
the original 1963 The Haunting.
anD, uh, Essie Flaynor is coming on to
talk about the Fear Street movies with us.
That's gonna be exciting.
I know is, uh, super jazzed
to talk about Underworld.
Ben: about you, Emily?
What are you excited for?
Emily: Well, I was, I do really want
to talk about No One Will Save You
and I know that there's a lot of other
movies that I've talked about wanting
to talk about, but I am excited for the
movie I'm choosing for my birthday this
year, unless things change drastically
and I have to talk about something
else, because right now it's Wild
Zero, and that one is so fun It's like
evil dead, but punk more punk rock
and
gayer.
Jeremy: I've seen Wild Zero.
It's been a hot minute since I've
seen it, but it was, it's a wild film.
Emily: It is, is on, it is on the tent.
It says like what it says on the tent.
Jeremy: Yeah, I, I would love to like,
get in some of the stuff that was in
my scary movie month from this year.
I think you guys would really like,
Wasera the Bone Woman, which is
the,
Emily: oh, I saw that one.
Yeah,
I saw that one too.
And I like that one a lot.
Jeremy: Yeah, that attachment
attachment again gay and Jewish which
we've had trouble, we had trouble
finding both of those when we started,
and then, uh, Medusa, the Brazilian
horror film is super interesting, and
a kind of a rough watch, but those,
those three, no one will save you.
And then, I would love, like, I finally
watched James Whale's The Invisible
Man I think if we're gonna do another,
like, director that we, that we have
a whole month of, I'd love to, like,
talk about James Whale and talk about
The Invisible Man, Frankenstein, Bride
of Frankenstein, and was the old,
Ben: Now, the movie The Whale was
Jeremy: something else.
Uh
Ben: director James Whale, right?
Jeremy: No, but Gods and
Ben: Oh shit!
Jeremy: starring Brendan Fraser,
was about James Whale, so.
Ben: That's very con
that's actually confusing!
What the fuck?
God damn!
Emily: I didn't even know that,
that there was, those streams are
crossed, but I guess they are.
Jeremy: Yeah,
I am pretty hardcore that
we will never talk about the
film, The Whale, on this show.
Oh
Ben: and be like, The Whale, was that
one of those Spider Man villain movies
without Spider Man that Sony makes?
Is he gonna team up with Dr.
Michael Morbius?
Emily: Doctor,
Ben: The Whale, we gotta
go fight Spider Man!
Emily: just, I didn't know
Morbius first name was Michael.
Jeremy: yeah,
Ben: Yeah, Dr.
Michael
Emily: too?
Does he,
Jeremy: I think Morbius
also has an M middle
Ben: Yes, it's Michael M.
Morbius.
Emily: does he do Roger and
Me by Michael and Morbius?
Ben: Uh, sometimes Stanley's
commitment to the alliteration
bit just got absurdly delightful.
Emily: Yeah, I mean, good for him.
Good.
For.
Him.
Jeremy: Dr.
Michael Morbius.
Nicknames, Dr.
Mike, Mike, Mikey, Mikey boy.
Morbius, the living vampire.
Emily: I like the, all the mics.
Like, the mics are definitely,
like, they, they are more
important than the, the morbing.
according to this source,
which I assume is some sort
of Wikipedia or fan Wikipedia.
Jeremy: Yeah, it's the
Ben: This is just consulting
a single Jared Leto interview.
Emily: Cousin Mikey.
Mikey boy.
We
Ben: Oh, so we will, I guess
we will, what, what, what
episode is coming out next?
What do the people have to
look forward to after this?
Jeremy: So after this, what we should
be looking at is people will finally
get to hear the fill in episode from
the week, I Missed, where, Emily had
folks on to talk about Vampire Hunter D.
Ben: Yeah!
Emily: baby!
Ben: Vampire Hunter
Deep, that movie ruled!
Emily: Yeah, that was
talk about a
Ben: no
plot, and it was fucking awesome!
Emily: movie was just, fuck,
this shit happening, and
Ben: Vibes!
Emily: rad.
Ben: It was a Patrick
Willems branded vibes movie.
I can confirm, I talked to Patrick
Will I talked to Patrick at New York
Comic Con, he confirmed that yes,
Vampire Hunter D is a vibes movie.
Emily: Yeah, I mean, how could you
not, like, both Vampire Hunter D's
are vibes movies, but Bloodlust was
like, No, actually we, we need to
consolidate and distill these vibes,
like these vibes must become a fine
liqueur of vibes and like, that's what,
Ben: well, it's just just that
like, hey, you're following a
protagonist, he's committed to the
job, he doesn't have feelings, maybe
he teams up with woman, every time.
She doesn't matter, she's interchangeable.
Emily: She's, she's got a gun and is cool.
Ben: he doesn't actually have
a character arc, this is, it's
just, the plot doesn't matter.
You're just here to see him do
vampire huntery things in this world
that doesn't really make sense,
but damn if it ain't gorgeous.
Emily: Yeah.
Yeah.
So, if you like Castlevania,
enjoy.
Ben: If you like Miami Vice if
you like the Mi Michael Mann's
Miami Vice, or Christopher Nolan's
Tenet, will like Vampire Hunter D.
Jeremy: Wow, what
an interesting series of comparisons.
Emily: yes.
Ben: movies!
Emily: Listen, Jeremy, I don't
like Castlevania, the show.
I'm talking about Castlevania, the film.
I mean, Castlevania, the,
the film for, for, for Nintendo,
Ben: That one,
Emily: nominated
Ben: that one,
Emily: of the, that's for
a PlayStation, but yeah.
I sure did.
I was just thinking about how
Symphony of the Night is a film in my
mind.
Jeremy: that you play.
Emily: It's a film that I play.
It's,
Jeremy: Yeah.
Emily: It's very avant garde.
Jeremy: Well, uh, after this comes
up, I mean, I think we have Vampire
Entity, and then I think we'll have,
Soft and Quiet, and then we get into
our Black Directors Month, which, uh,
we're talking about an angry black girl
and her monster, we're talking about
the blackening, we're talking about the
miniseries The Other Black Girl, and
we're talking about Sorry to Bother You,
Ben: Oh, I am so excited for that.
Jeremy: Yeah, it's gonna be a good set.
We've got a lot of really
great guests lined up for that.
yeah, after that, we're talking
about, Skin of Marink and Bones and
all and the Haunting and Fear Street.
So we've got a lot of, a lot of great
stuff already lined up for the new year.
Emily: Right,
Ben: Alright.
Emily: stay tuned and stay
horrified because I'm sure it's
also elections are happening this
Ben: Fuckin welcome to year four, baby!
We're still kickin
Emily: Yeah,
Jeremy: Absolutely.
Emily: Prague Horror Pod.
Jeremy: Well until next
year, uh, stay horrified.
Emily: Excellent.