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Breast Cancer doesn't care where you live, who you know, how healthy you are, how many initials you have behind your name, or the color of your skin. It could care less about money. This is a party that you never RSVP’d to, yet you are the guest of honor… and you don’t know what to do next.
Being diagnosed with breast cancer is where the discussion starts. Join host Shellie Turner in her new podcast that will shine light upon the darkness of diagnosis, giving you the support and information you need to keep moving forward from fellow fighters and survivors. We know you have questions, and this is a space where you can begin to find answers, community, and a voice for yourself in this journey. C. We Do Have a Voice welcomes you to the marvelous light of day.
Shellie:
Welcome to C We Do Have A Voice. I'm your host, Shelly Turner. Being diagnosed with breast cancer is where the discussion starts. Breast cancer doesn't care where you live. It doesn't care who you know, how healthy you are, how many initials you have behind your name, or what color your skin is. This podcast is a platform that will create discussion in order to help you find your story, your decisions, your information, and your understanding. Now let's get into it. Hi, this is Shelly. And we're back again. And our guest today is Sarah Keith. The stories that are being told here are the healing. And we want to hear from everybody, anybody, and Sarah, let's talk about your story.
Sarah:
Absolutely. Thank you for taking the time to talk to me.
Shellie:
And because you have two babies and kitties, thank you for taking this. Tell them. Thank you.
Sarah:
Yes. Yes. They are out for a walk. It is a strangely quiet. This is not a quiet household.
Shellie:
How could it be right?
Sarah:
I am just about a year out from my diagnosis.
Shellie:
Oh, congratulations.
Sarah:
Thank you. It's so interesting when I tell my story because I still feel like I am telling somebody else's story. I'm still, I think, in the place where it still doesn't feel real.
Shellie:
Was that me? Yes. Did I?
Sarah:
I, there's no way I had that surgery, right? Like it just doesn't. And I've, you know, I've, I've obviously told this story enough times. Now you would think it would start to click that, no, this is your body. This is happening to you, but it's, but it is your story though. It is my story as crazy as it feels. Um, so I was diagnosed last August. My son, was about two and a half. And I had been breastfeeding for, uh, for like almost six years straight between my daughter and then I got pregnant and then my son. So I was working, working hard on weaning him. And you know, when you're breastfeeding, like, or at least me, I was like, so, you know, you're just touching your breasts all the time and it's hard for the course. And I was in bed, I was nursing him and I just, you know, I felt my breast and there was a lump that hadn't been there before. And I, my mom was in town, it was mother's day.
Shellie:
Okay, great.
Sarah:
And I, I walked out and I was like, Oh, I have another clogged duct.
SPEAKER_02:
Okay.
Sarah:
It makes sense. I'm weaning all the things literally did not think twice about it. Like just,
Shellie:
Cause you're breastfeeding.
Sarah:
I remember I got in the shower later that night and I just like started trying to rub it out. Like, you know, how I would, I've had so many fogs. I had mastitis way more times than anybody should have mastitis. So, you know, it just was kind of, it was like very normal to me, like just not alarming. And then about a month later, I, I just went in for my yearly physical and I mentioned it to my doctor and she was like, feels like a cyst or a clog, you know, um, You know, and again, I was so caught. I just like really in my soul was like, that's nothing.
Shellie:
No, because it's the furthest thing from your mind ever.
Sarah:
So I went a couple more months. And then I think my intuition kicked in. I would say around like early August, I was like, you know, okay, something doesn't feel right about this now. The lump hasn't changed. It doesn't hurt. There's nothing. It's just still there. And so I went to my OB and he, he said the same thing. He was like, it feels like a cyst, but I think you should just get it checked. Just check it off your list.
Shellie:
Yeah, let's do that.
Sarah:
Just make sure. So I, you know, I called, I tried to make an appointment. They were going to get me in for an ultrasound at the end of November. This is early August. What? Uh-huh. And I just was like, I have great insurance. Um, I just was like, this is not, I, you know, my mind, I need to move, move past this now. So he, I called him back and he recommended I go to this doctor in Beverly Hills. He takes cash. I can submit a super bell, um, and just, you know, move on.
SPEAKER_02:
Mm-hmm.
Sarah:
I went the next day, I had my ultrasound, my mammogram, my biopsy. The doctor was just the most kind hearted man ever. But I remember, I just like can remember his face changing. Because he at first was like, it looks a little bit like a cyst. Let me just keep looking. And it's like, it just changed. And I remember I had a necklace on that had my son's name, Teddy. And he he was like, who's Teddy? And I was like, my son. And he started asking all these questions about my kids. And he's like, I have grandkids and I have children. And I just I just remember being like, get to it.
Shellie:
This is not. This is not. Yeah.
Sarah:
Yeah. Like this is not. Yeah, this is not good. They called me the next day. You have breast cancer. And I honest, I feel like I blacked out for the day. Of course. Like, of course, gone. But what was incredible is the speed at which everything moved from there. I was in surgery and honestly starting chemo before I would have even had that first ultrasound appointment in November.
Shellie:
Yeah, and I don't understand that, but that's what a lot of people go through. Exactly. The referrals, getting on a list, and it doesn't happen right away for a lot of people.
Sarah:
No, and so I was stage two, just based on the size, but it had not spread to my lymph nodes. I think so often, like, what if I had waited until November for that ultrasound, and then waited to get that biopsy, and then waited for the, and you know, then it's early February, March, where I'm getting surgery, and like, would I have been stage two still? Because it was grade three, really just off the charts aggressive, lucky me, as it is in so many young women. And so I just felt, I feel, you know, like, the lucky cancer card, right? Like I caught it early, I got in early, I was able to take care of it.
Shellie:
Is there anybody else in your family that had breast cancer? So you're that person.
Sarah:
No, I mean really no family history, no risk. Nothing. Nothing. I always joke, like, you know, I only eat organic and I exercise and I'm a healthy weight for my body and I don't drink too much alcohol. You know, it's like I do all the things.
Shellie:
And cancer does not care.
SPEAKER_02:
No.
Shellie:
Cancer doesn't care where you live. Cancer don't care what color your skin is. Cancer doesn't care about initials behind your name. Cancer doesn't care about your bank account. Cancer is like knock, knock. Who's there? It's cancer. And you've been invited to a party. You don't have to RSVP because you're there. So yeah, let's go. Let's get the party started. So how does your husband do with it?
Sarah:
Oh my God. So the day, the day that I went in for the ultrasound, he actually flew to Vancouver that morning to work for two months. So my mom would come in to help with the kids. So he was not there, which was really hard for him, for me, for just, I mean, in general, my mom was there, which was amazing to support, but my husband was not there. And I, I think just the way he handled it, I mean, also the way I handled it, both of us were just like, we don't have time for this. Let's power through this. We are, this is not, this is not my story. Okay.
Shellie:
That's right. But it is your story. It is your story. It's your story.
Sarah:
And it's interesting. I, I feel like I have spent a lot of time being like, oh, cancer doesn't define you. It doesn't. But then I've kind of come to this new place where I'm like, Well, it does. It's a really big part of my story.
Shellie:
Yes, it does. Because it's not a secret.
Sarah:
Absolutely not. And it does define, you know, we wouldn't have moved to Mammoth. We wouldn't have, you know, done this life choice. We wouldn't be here. And so it is interesting how much I pushed back on that. And then I realized, like, no, it can define me, like, in any way that I choose.
Shellie:
It's a conversation that you can have now. Absolutely, you can have it. So if you even hear somebody say, oh, so-and-so's got breast cancer, your intent is gonna perk up. It's like, who, what, where? It is your story. Now, how you defined it or what you do with it, that's all of our choices, but it's your story. So how did you do with the chemo?
Sarah:
I think it's kind of the same thing I said before. I really was like, not today, cancer. I don't have time for you.
Shellie:
Yeah, I got kids. I have kids.
Sarah:
And look, I also think just physically, it is, it affects everybody so differently. You know, I definitely didn't feel myself, but I was able to continue with life and keep going. I cold capped my hair. It was a commitment. I ended up keeping about 40, 50% of my hair, which at the time was great. But then all the hair that you lose starts growing in and then you have like this whole situation happening.
Shellie:
Yeah. You have the Chia pet look.
Sarah:
You know, at the time I just was like, I don't want to look in the mirror and look sick. I don't want, I don't want that. And then it's almost like you remove yourself like after treatment, it's kind of like, But also, I was just sick. I know you can't tell, but I was just sick. You know, so it's like both.
Shellie:
You want to wear a sign and say, I've been sick, OK? Don't act.
Sarah:
I've been sick. You know, so it's just interesting. It's just all of it, all of it. It is. There's like two truths to everything, two sides to every decision, every part of this whole journey.
Shellie:
But the main decision is your decision.
Sarah:
Yes. Um, but chemo was okay. I, you know, I had four rounds I did TC, which I know is a little bit more tolerable. It was more tolerable for me for sure. And then I did radiation. I had 30 rounds of radiation every day, every day, which, you know, cancer, my full-time job. And then, you know, I got that break, which was great. Yes. You heal up. And my plan was to get implants just to get, I wanted it behind me so badly. And I knew that if I did the implants, it kind of just felt like it was done. So I went in for my surgery in the beginning of August and then woke up from surgery and had an expander and an implant. And like my, you know, my date was pushed because I had a low grade infection. from the radiation.
SPEAKER_00:
Oh, that that's almost a sure thing. Yeah, that's almost a sure thing.
Sarah:
So my team, my team was just like, you are not a great candidate for implants. And I was so mad and so sad. And I think it was like my finish line getting pushed and my plan being taken away from me and just all of that. I was so that like disappointed harder than anything else that was disappointing. It was so disappointing. And I also had to heal from that surgery just to go back into surgery, which was. Yeah, but it's a lot.
Shellie:
It's a lot. That's why, you know, people want to talk about getting the mastectomy. I chose that because I think I think I saw three different plastic surgeons. And one was talking about the flap, and one was talking about taking a piece from my back, you know, under your arm and making a cup and then putting the implant there. And then one of the guys told me, he says, well, you've had surgery on the left side, so just fix the right side. And I'm like, what? I said, so I'm going to have a titty over here. And what are we going to do over here? Well, just fix one. And then he takes a call and says, Oh, I haven't, I haven't been able to talk to my wife all day. Excuse me. By the time. Yeah. By the time he came back, I was gone. So, you know, I just felt so much more comfortable because there were too many options. And just like, you know, the first doctor that did my first surgery, he did the incision too high. And then the scar tissue wasn't going to allow for an implant. I'm like, you know, you get breast cancer, then you get all these reasons. And I, like you, thought, oh, I'm gonna get new titties. I'm gonna get implants. And oh, yeah, this is gonna work. But then it was like, no, you can't because of the scar tissue. I'm like, I'm good. I'm good. Let him let him go. I'm 66 years old. Let him go. We've had a great relationship. I'm divorced, so forget it. So it's like, you know, I said,
Sarah:
I felt with my mastectomy too, I was like so at peace. I was very at peace with the mastectomy part, but I wasn't at peace yet for me with going flat.
Shellie:
I wasn't, I was like, take my boobs.
Sarah:
But I still, I still like, you know, I, yeah, you just want some. I still want boobs. They don't need to be mine. I just want them. Right now I have about one and a half boobs. I would say this, my cancer side is still really mad. I mean, I'm still healing.
Shellie:
Yeah. Well, you're, you're only one year out. So.
Sarah:
And I'm six weeks out from surgery.
Shellie:
So it's still really, you're still brand new.
Sarah:
Yeah, but I have one great boob that has been such a trooper through this whole thing. Cause it's like, wait, I didn't have, I didn't have cancer. Why are you taking me too?
Shellie:
Yeah. It's like, what, what, explain this to me, help me out. So what is your end game? Are they going to do both implants or just implants at all?
Sarah:
Um, so I, I, with the flap for me, they took the chunk of my abdomen. Right aid to breasts. I mean, I guess the first surgery is really just about getting the tissue to survive. Yeah, putting the healthy tissue into my radiated side, they're hoping, you know, get that blood flowing again. And the next spring, I can just do some fat grafting all my
Shellie:
So now you're a project. Oh, I'm totally a project. Oh my God. That's what I said. I just couldn't go through all that. I just couldn't do it because, you know, it's like, you can take this and then you'll have, and then she goes, well, do you wear a midriffs or something back out? And I said, no, not really. She said, cause you're going to have a scar on your back. I'm like, okay, thank you. You know, so it, It just, there was too many options and none of them were in my favor. Right. So I said, thank you.
Sarah:
It is amazing how many options there are.
Shellie:
Yeah, but you have to work for it. You have to work for it.
Sarah:
Absolutely. There's no just like one and done here.
Shellie:
And yeah, just like you're saying, you know, you've got this one boob that's trying to figure out what's going on and you know, you forgot about me. I'm not sick. So what are we doing? Yeah. And then you got the other side that says, uh-uh, shut up, because we're sick over here. So it's like, and you have to keep your mind on, I'm not my breast, and my breasts are not me. I have children. I have my life. And it's like, is that going to be enough? Because when you're there and alone in the bath and the shower, and you're taking it down, it's like, oh, OK, I forgot. OK, yeah, you're right. This is what it is right now. So you're a big girl. Congratulations, because I'm just saying you're new to the journey and the journey is long. So the cancer's over, you know, and it's, I talked to a girl recently and she said something to me that I had never really heard. And she said her doctor came in and she was second stage. She was in her, yeah, she's stage two. And her doctor recommended that she not have any chemo. And he said, I know people do it, he says, but I just don't recommend it. And she, this is, she's going on 13, 14 years. And all she had was the radiation. And she put that on my heart and I'm like, what if I didn't have, you know, any chemo? Cause I've had, I've had breast cancer three times, you know, 98 and past that five years. But in good old 12 year, it came back and then good old 10 years later, it came back. So I, when I heard her say that, I was like, you know, it, it just, it made me think a long time. What would have happened if I didn't have chemo? Nobody ever said don't have chemo. Chemo is like your first, you know, mechanism, first line of defense. Let's go get chemo. Chemo's first, you know, chemo radiation. You got breast cancer, chemo radiation. But when she said to me, and she said, I still have my breasts. And I'm like, I see. I certainly see. But she never had chemo and she's fine. So it's like. The options are so many, the choices, you have the experience of the choice, but are you comfortable thinking that everybody's getting the same treatment, everybody's getting the same information? And that's just not true. We all don't get the same information, but I had never heard that before. And I was like, I wanted to be mad.
Sarah:
At first, my doctor told me actually that if it was not in my lymph nodes, that I may not need chemo, even being staged. But my oncologist, because I'm a hormone positive. Yeah, I did the onco type score and there's another one, I forget the name of it. And based on those scores, plus my grade and my age.
Shellie:
How old were you when you were first diagnosed? Thirty six. OK, because I was thirty seven.
Sarah:
Okay. So yeah, based on those things, she said that she would recommend the chemo, but my surgeon, my surgeon said I would have been on the border for me though. I just, I think if I didn't do it, cause I was definitely on the border for radiation as well.
Shellie:
Right. Right.
Sarah:
As I did the mastectomy and chemo, but I just was like, if I don't do it and it comes back in four years, eight years, 15 years, Am I going to look back and just be like, why didn't I?
Shellie:
Right. Why didn't I? And that's what I mean. Yep. Because no information is set in stone.
SPEAKER_00:
Yeah.
Shellie:
It's like they give you that. They let you make the decision. Yeah. But how in the heck are you going to have all the information? Yeah. So you can say, well, I know for sure. But I'm telling you, when she told me that I sat back, I'm like, what?
Sarah:
Yeah.
Shellie:
You know, and I'm like, the second time chemo almost sent me to the grave and I'm like, well, Why did I have to have chemo? You know, but they were like, oh, it's more aggressive because it came back. Right. The reason I just really wanted to do this, you know, podcast and create a platform because cancer has to stop being the loudest voice in the room. You know, you really have to tell cancer, excuse me, just like you said, your husband, like we don't have time for this.
SPEAKER_02:
We got kids.
Shellie:
I got things to do. I got, you know, I'm cooking. I'm having friends over. Kids got to eat. Cats are running around. Not today. And then you lay down at night and you close your eyes and it's like, oh, it is. Here I am.
Sarah:
One of my girlfriends, her dad didn't have he had lymphoma. But when I first got diagnosed, I just remember her telling me that when he was in treatment and doing chemo, he would go for a run every single day. And every time his foot hit the pavement, he would say, not today, cancer.
Shellie:
Not today.
Sarah:
Not today, cancer. And that, to me, has been in my mind the whole time.
Shellie:
You're in charge, not cancer. Not today. And it's like, when you realize your voice has to be the loudest voice in the room, and cancer is just a situation for now. But then when the surgeries are over, and then now you're left with what cancer has left you with. So it's like, OK, you still don't win because this is still my body. Yeah, I'm going to make the choices for me. Cancer is like, but you will never forget me. And that's the only thing that makes sense with cancer. Cancer will let you know you'll never forget me.
Sarah:
Might get a little quieter, I've heard. Maybe we'll be so loud.
Shellie:
That's what I say. Don't let it be the louder voice in the room. But hopefully it'll start getting quieter. So did you reach out to different organizations or any, you know, breast cancer organizations or anything like that?
Sarah:
trying to think. Not really. You know, I had such good friends and I felt so supported. Thankfully I had a really good therapist.
Shellie:
Ah, you needed help.
Sarah:
So weird, right? Like who would ever need therapy through a cancer diagnosis?
Shellie:
Well, they give it to you. They, they suggest that because they suggested that for me. And when I went and sat and talked with her, I'm like, I have no idea what we're supposed to talk to talk about. You know what she wanted to do? She wanted to put me on Zoloft.
Sarah:
Well, so postpartum I had, I really struggled with postpartum anxiety. So I actually had gone to therapy for postpartum anxiety and was on Zoloft already, um, for that. So I, with my diagnosis, like I already had the support, which was so helpful.
Shellie:
It was in place.
Sarah:
The support was in place for that last struggle.
Shellie:
Right, right.
Sarah:
So I'm grateful for that.
Shellie:
That's good. That's good. But so do you know anybody else that has breast cancer?
Sarah:
I do. I've made new friends. I've had I've had friends that had carved, you know, been on their journey before me that we've become much closer. I mean, the community of young women, I mean, women in general, but especially young women with breast cancer, it feels like the worst club with the best members, I think is what they say. Like, everybody is so eager to help and reach out and support.
Shellie:
And that's it. That's really your therapy. That's really your therapy. That's really your therapy when you have men. Yes. Yeah. Because now these are your girls, you know, these, these are your girls and you can talk to your mother, you can talk to your husband, you can have those talks. But with these women, your story is familiar to them and their story is familiar to you.
Sarah:
Yes. And like being able to, you know, get the good, the bad, the ugly of, you know, what was the surgery like for you? What was chemo like for you? So, you know, obviously it's going to be my own story and my, my body is going to do its thing, but knowing kind of all the different things for me was really great.
Shellie:
and everybody's going to share. You'll meet somebody tomorrow and then you have a new story. Now you'll share yours and she'll share hers. But with breast cancer, it's just the stories never end and the support because That is one thing that is gonna get you through even, you know, the darkest day to know that there are still so many women out there that are at your beck and call. You know, the support groups, the friends, the friend that knows a friend that knows a friend. Always, you know, breast cancer, it's like, you know, the grapevine. You can always come to the vine and get a grape because the branches are long and there are so many. And when Matthew told me about you, I said, well, let's talk to Sarah. Let's see Sarah's story. But you're so young in it. You're still, you're right there in it. You're still on the poke and prod team. It's like, oh yeah, let us do this, let us do this. So how's your stomach doing? Are you still a little achy, a little sore, Little numb.
Sarah:
I'm a little sore. I'm a little tight still. I had a freckle like right here, kind of below my rib cage that is now next to my new belly button.
Shellie:
People always talk about that. It's like it just moves. You can imagine. They restructure your skin. Really.
Sarah:
It's so crazy. Yeah. Literally they just stretch your skin down, but I'm, I'm really doing okay. I, the first two weeks were so hard. I, they were so much harder than I anticipated because my mastectomy, I think I prepared for it to be so hard. And then I was like, Oh, I've got this. This is, you know, And so I kind of went into the flap surgery with this attitude and came out being like, this is not like having a C-section.
Shellie:
It's like you're, they've just, you know, invaded your stomach. It's like you pulled what? Where? Okay.
Sarah:
Yeah. You took one out and it is, you're monitoring me every 15 minutes. It was, it was nuts. Um, but I really like once I hit that two week mark, I felt so much better. It really was like night and day at that two week mark. And then it's been up from there. So I'm, I'm feeling a lot better.
Shellie:
Does your two year old want to be picked up all the time?
Sarah:
Yeah. He's a mommy. Yeah.
Shellie:
Yeah.
Sarah:
Yeah.
Shellie:
Yeah. That's what it is. It's up. I know up. But they, they, they couldn't get it if you explained it to him. So
Sarah:
No. And, you know, it's it's beautiful. He being a little too young to understand is great. He definitely has moments where he'll ask me something that I'm like, oh, wow, you understand so much more. Yeah. Yeah.
Shellie:
For my daughter being seven, I think it was much I not think I know it was much harder on her because she sees what she doesn't understand and it doesn't look good to her at all.
Sarah:
Very scary. I mean, cancer is a really big, scary word, right? Like you get a cancer diagnosis and you're like, cool, how long do I have?
Shellie:
You know, like this is really, that's where you start before they start telling you, okay, we can treat you this, this, this. But when you hear cancer, you think, am I getting ready to die? You know, what is really going on here? So do you think about your daughter, you know, and her diagnosis and.
Sarah:
I do. Um, I also have a sister who's 10 years younger than me. So, you know, now she's on the MRI path. What about the, what about the BRCA?
Shellie:
Did you do a BRCA?
Sarah:
Nope. Yeah. No, no genes.
Shellie:
It was negative. That's good. Yeah.
Sarah:
Yeah. Yeah. Um, for my daughter though, you know, it's, I hate it. Like I hate it for her. I hate that she's going to have to check.
Shellie:
Cause it's like, where did you get it from? You know, why you, what?
Sarah:
Right. Um, I hate it for her at the same time with so many young women being diagnosed now, what is it? My age group, I think has gone up 20% right. With so many young women being diagnosed, it's almost a little bit comforting knowing that as she gets older, she will be so closely watched that if, you know, if she's going to get breast cancer as well, they're going to find it stage zero and they're going to get it out of there. And that's going to be it, you know, there's so that I find comfort in that for her.
Shellie:
There's a lot of things out there. And by the time she gets up age, I'm sure, you know, it'll be a zap, but in the, yeah, the secret, the secret vaccine, the super vaccine that I think is somewhere in the ball waiting, you know, to just bust out one day and say, Oh, we finally discovered. It's like, no, you did not. No, you did not. Right.
Sarah:
I know even me, I'm like, Oh my God, you know, cause I'm a year out. So I'm still like recurrence, recurrence, recurrence. Ouch. Is that, you know, do I need, and I will sometimes correct myself and be like, you don't have to make it that long because they're going to, there's new stuff all the time.
Shellie:
You just have to tell your body, my body's not available for that. There's, there's no vacancy signs here. You know, it's just not available for that anymore. And people say to me, Oh wow, you've had it three times. What if it comes back? Well, how about it's not? I'm not in the what if, what if with cancer ever again. It's not, I'm done. Coming back a third time, I really felt the day that I went in for the surgery that I should have went back and apologized, because I was ugly that day. I was so angry. And I mean, because it was so microscopic, I had to go in and they had to put an antenna so the surgeon would know because it was so little. So here they are giving me shots in my breasts to numb the area. And then he's trying to stick this thing in me. So my surgeon will see, you know, where it is because it's just so microscopic. And then they want us to do a mammogram. I'm like, I have no breasts. What do you mean a mammogram? And they were like squeezing. I was very ugly that day. And I really felt the next day I said, I really should go back and apologize. Cause I just didn't understand. It's like, number one, This is number three. I removed my breasts because you said that's what I needed to do. And I couldn't have been more preventive if you, you know, just stuck a stick in me. But here I am, and oh, I was pretty angry that day. I was pretty angry, because they were just doing so much. And then when I finally get to see my surgeon, I'm like, what the heck? She said, well, I didn't want to tell you that, because then I really didn't think that you would be receptive of it. I said, no, I'm not receptive. There's some sticking needles in me. Tell me, can you feel it? Can you feel it? So cancer is a lifestyle, and it's unfortunate, because you will now Just like you say, you touch and feel like, okay, it's never gonna not be where you wanna touch and feel, oh, casual, yes, but you will be touching casually, but with intent. It's like, okay, I just don't want. And even for the second time for me, when I found it, I finished taking a shower, I went to work, I didn't think another thing about it. I called my doctor, I said, I think I need to come in. Because I knew what it was. But you don't wanna know, But you want to know.
SPEAKER_00:
Oh, absolutely.
Shellie:
You're going to always be looking around the corner like a hello. OK.
Sarah:
Oh, for sure. Like I don't want like my labs every I get labs every three months at them, but also I can't wait for them because I get that clean bill every three months. I'm like, OK, good for three months because I had to do a PET scan.
Shellie:
I do them twice a year now. And I think I did it. end of October. So when I see on my phone, you know, my doctor's office, I'm like, you know what? And she goes, hi, Shelly. And I'm like, OK, that's a good sign. cause she's all chipper and perky. And she says, doctor, just want you to know, you know, everything's clear. There's nothing there and you have a great day. And I'm like, you too. And thank you for calling this time, you know, this time.
Sarah:
I don't need to apologize tomorrow.
Shellie:
Thank you. And so now I'm like, okay, good. I'm good. You know, there was nothing there, but. Nothing there doesn't mean it's nothing there. And that's what I've learned. And I don't, I don't try to fool myself that nothing, them saying nothing there means there's nothing there because all three times I had mammograms and said nothing, there was nothing, no indication on the mammogram. So cancer is a secret, but it's going to stay a quiet secret.
Sarah:
find it yourself all three times?
Shellie:
First two, yes. The third had no idea because even when the guy was trying to push the antenna, he said, well, do you want to see it? I'm like, no, no, just hurry up. No, stop. This is not showing tail. Let's go. I was a little angry the third time, you know, a little angry because it was a her two positive at that. You know, the first two had been estrogen sensitive stage one. And here's this her two positive thing. It's like, well, what is that? Where did that even Yeah. Oh, yeah. Came back different.
Sarah:
But it's not was it not a recurrence that it was a first for the her to.
Shellie:
With a mastectomy, a mastectomy. On the on the left side, which was the first side, and it was that microscopic that, like I said, they had to insert an antenna. That was just making me angry, just the conversation. My oncologist is so amazing and he's the best, the best. But I was giving him the blues that day because I was like, I don't understand. You know, I just don't understand. So my attitude conveyed that I didn't understand.
Sarah:
Yeah, for sure. I mean, again, understandably, that's. definitely not what you probably expect.
Shellie:
No, it's not because everything is preventative, you know. And that's why I said, OK, take my breasts, take my ovaries at that. And. It just wasn't it didn't happen the way they said, so that's why I say, you know, you always look around the corner, you want to know, but you don't know, but you know, you are in the arena where it's always a possibility.
Sarah:
Absolutely.
Shellie:
But you're good, though. You're good. You've got the attitude. It's really the attitude. So you have an organization?
Sarah:
I started a small business. Oh, well, shoot.
Shellie:
Sarah, you're just going to let us go on and on and not even say, oh, Shelly. I'll talk to you for hours. Shelly, by the way.
Sarah:
Let's talk about that. Yes, I would love to. I, so during radiation, one of my friends just, you know, was like, do you want to take a pottery class with me? And I was like, yeah, it's bucket list, right? Like for so many people, it's a, you know, I'm sure I would love to try that out. And so I did, I was so bad at it, kept at it. And at the end of, you know, our, I think we had six weeks, I had this little vase that actually resembled a vase and I was so proud of it.
Shellie:
Artwork.
Sarah:
Oh, my gosh. This one piece I'm so proud of. And I had just I was finishing up radiation that week as well. And I took the base and I just pressed two little boobs into it. And, you know, it just it felt special and it felt like it was marking that time. Like I'm done. You know, it broke in the fire.
Shellie:
There goes your boob, your boob story.
Sarah:
Devastated. but I made another one that turned out great. Um, and then I made 10 and I gifted them to all my doctors. And then, yeah, so that's, that's how it started is I was just going to make them as gifts. And then, you know, then I had a few women as well, and I was like, Oh, I would love to, you know, she helped me on my journey or she didn't, you know, and I would love to gift gift her one. And then it, I think early on in my journey, I am still early on in my journey, but early on in my journey, I was like, what do I do with this? What do I do? Am I going to volunteer for this? Am I going to help out here? What am I going to do with this to make it feel positive? And so I had been kind of searching for that almost. And when I started making the vases, my pottery, It just started falling into place. People wanted them. And people were seeing my vision of creating something to mark our journey. And so I started selling them. And I donate all of my profits to an organization, a 501c3 called Thriving Beyond Breast Cancer that another young mom started. Her name is Elizabeth. lovely. She's a two year old daughter. But she kind of felt found that gap in young women under 40 that aren't lower class. So they're not qualifying for assistance, but they're not like upper class, you know,
Shellie:
Oh yeah, the, the in-between.
Sarah:
And so she, her mission is to, um, provide stipends for those women. Oh, wow. Or to help them get support, get treatment, you know, whatever they need. And then she's also, you know, her vision is to provide mental health support community. with a focus on that. And I just, I thought that that is a section of women that is just so missed in this. And it's also growing so quickly. So I just, I loved her vision. So I donate my profits to her and I'm just making, beautiful things that I'm proud of. And you put flowers in them and it just feels like, you know, like here's, here's something beautiful and I'm making it. And the feedback I've gotten has been just that. And, you know, everybody's body is different. So every vase is different and everybody's story is different. So, you know, some of them are painted, some of them are not there, you know, I've done ones with scars, ones with nipples, ones without.
Shellie:
So that necklace you have on. Yeah, I noticed that necklace you have on. I see the little two dots. I was like, OK.
Sarah:
Yeah, I do drop. So I'll have a small stock, usually like 20 to 40 pieces, and I'll release them. And my heart just bursts because they sell out so quickly, which was just like not what I ever would have expected.
Shellie:
But see, you see how things go? Because now if you had not been diagnosed with breast cancer, you would not be in the new circle that you're in. You would not be doing the work that God has probably chosen you to do. And just like you said, they sell out. So you wouldn't be servicing the people that you are servicing and what would they have done without you?
Sarah:
It feels really special.
Shellie:
Yeah. And that's what I mean. It's like we get breast cancer, not because we want to, but I believe that we have a purpose after. You know, there is life after breast cancer, but what is the life gonna be? And it really looks like you're living your life. Congratulations. Those are beautiful. Thank you so much. So I want one. I think you deserve one at this point. Yeah, that's what I'm really saying. It's like, ooh, how can I get that? Those are amazing though. But that's really cute because it's so unusual. But you were speaking to women that we still matter. And it's just a little mug with these little, little chi-chis, but it's like, it could wait. It's not for a man. You can't give it to the guys at work. It's like, it's personal. And there's an unspoken, you know, type of language giving that and receiving that. So congratulations. That's amazing. That's very cute. That's very different. I mean, and just like I said, everybody's story is healing and what you are doing. If they sell out, they're giving them to people for the healing. So you've created your own little space and it's your space. Nobody's doing that. I've never seen that before. Yeah, that's really cute. Very good job. And just think where you're going to go with it.
Sarah:
Absolutely.
Shellie:
Sarah, it was really, really amazing talking to you. And thank you so much for taking the time. And it was wonderful to meet you.
Sarah:
It was so nice to meet you as well.
Shellie:
Thanks, everyone, for listening. Make sure to follow and rate the show wherever you get your podcast. This podcast is produced by Rainbow Creatives with executive producer Matthew Jones, producers Steven Selnick, and editors and mixers Rob Johnson and Stefano Montelli. See you on the next one.