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Why are you here? What are you supposed to be doing with your life? What is the reason for your existence? These questions seem aggressive in how they're phrased, but the fact of the matter is we all ask ourselves these questions. As they grow, your mentee is asking themself these questions too. So how do we help them discover their purpose in life? Zach is back with John Barnard from Middleman Ministries this week to share about the second of the three pillars of mentoring: purpose, and how you can help your mentee discover their vision, skills, and action steps to live out their calling.
Show Notes
Why are you here? What are you supposed to be doing with your life? What is the reason for your existence? These questions seem aggressive in how they're phrased, but the fact of the matter is we all ask ourselves these questions. As they grow, your mentee is asking themself these questions too. So how do we help them discover their purpose in life? Zach is back with John Barnard from Middleman Ministries this week to share about the second of the three pillars of mentoring: purpose, and how you can help your mentee discover their vision, skills, and action steps to live out their calling.
Reach out to John:
john@middleman-ministries.org
Check out Middleman Ministries:
https://www.middleman-ministries.org
Purchase the You Can Mentor book:
You Can Mentor: How to Impact Your Community, Fulfill the Great Commission, and Break Generational Curses
youcanmentor.com
Reach out to John:
john@middleman-ministries.org
Check out Middleman Ministries:
https://www.middleman-ministries.org
Purchase the You Can Mentor book:
You Can Mentor: How to Impact Your Community, Fulfill the Great Commission, and Break Generational Curses
youcanmentor.com
Creators and Guests
What is You Can Mentor: A Christian Youth Mentoring Podcast?
You Can Mentor is a network that equips and encourages mentors and mentoring leaders through resources and relationships to love God, love others, and make disciples in their own community. We want to see Christian mentors thrive.
We want to hear from you! Send any mentoring questions to hello@youcanmentor.com, and we'll answer them on our podcast. We want to help you become the best possible mentor you can be. Also, if you are a mentoring organization, church, or non-profit, connect with us to join our mentoring network or to be spotlighted on our show.
Please find out more at www.youcanmentor.com or find us on social media. You will find more resources on our website to help equip and encourage mentors. We have downloadable resources, cohort opportunities, and an opportunity to build relationships with other Christian mentoring leaders.
You can mentor is a podcast about the power of building relationships with kids from hard places in the name of Jesus. Every episode will help you overcome common mentoring obstacles and give you the confidence you need to invest in the lives of others. You can mentor.
Speaker 2:Mentors and mentoring leaders, Zach Arce here with the You Can Mentor podcast. I got 3 things that I would like to ask of you today. Number 1, if you are a mentoring organization and you would like to be on our podcast or learn more about the best practices of mentoring, please reach out to us, www.youcanmentor.com. You can send us an email, zachzach@youcanmentor.com, or stephen, that's with a ph@youcanmentor.com. You can also find us on social media.
Speaker 2:Give us that DM and we'll get back to you. We just wanna get to know you, and we wanna learn more about what you're doing in your communities to advance mentoring. And we believe that interaction leads to innovation. So let's work together and advance the team in through mentoring. Number 2, if you know of someone who would benefit from the You Can Mentor podcast, please share our podcast, share our information with them.
Speaker 2:That would be super helpful. And then lastly, if you could rate our podcast on Apple Podcasts, give us that 5 star. It will help spread the word about mentoring and, you can mentor podcast. Because we really do want every mentoring org in America who is trying to make disciples through mentoring to know about us. We wanna get to know about them so we can learn from them and work together to help kids reach their full potential.
Speaker 2:So that's what I got. Please do those things. Reach out to us. Share and rate. Appreciate you.
Speaker 2:You can mentor. Well, well, well, well, well, well, well, welcome back to the You Can Mentor podcast. Okeydokey, okeydokey. I'm gonna John, try the introduction again. Try it.
Speaker 2:Just do it. Off the cuff, go.
Speaker 3:Hey there, everybody. That's all I got.
Speaker 2:Welcome to the You Can Mentor podcast where we're really bad at introductions and kicking this thing off. But today, we're back. We're back. Yeah. We missed last week.
Speaker 2:Sorry about that. You traveled. I traveled. John's wife is sick. Goodness.
Speaker 2:It sounds kinda flippant, but she's been in the hospital.
Speaker 3:She yeah. She spent 2 days in the hospital.
Speaker 2:And, you know, just sometimes life happens.
Speaker 3:Life.
Speaker 2:But we're back, so it's good.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:What are we talking about this whole series, John?
Speaker 3:We're talking about identity. We're talking about purpose. We're talking about community.
Speaker 2:We call those the pillars of mentoring. This is what, like our 5th or 6th episode in the series.
Speaker 3:We're deep in the middle. We're right we're right in the middle of this thing. We have the IPC. We're right on the p, and I'm excited about that.
Speaker 2:IPC stands for, like John said, identity, purpose, and community. We're talking about purpose today, and we think it's really important. So, yeah, I guess that's it.
Speaker 3:Yeah. They're all they're all 3 super important. Right? They're pillars. Yeah.
Speaker 2:So if you lose one pillar, the whole thing comes crashing down.
Speaker 3:Are you imagining, like, like, a a colonial home
Speaker 2:that has colonial? I'm thinking Rome.
Speaker 3:Right. Okay. You're thinking, like, that Amphion.
Speaker 2:Yes. Amphion.
Speaker 3:I was thinking about a stool, like, with 3 legs
Speaker 2:You can go that route that
Speaker 3:you can sit on.
Speaker 2:Yeah. But I have never said, hey. Check out the pillar on that stool. It's wobbling.
Speaker 3:Yeah. That's true. We don't really use that. That's a that's a leg, not a pillar.
Speaker 2:Yeah. And if we called the series the legs of mentoring, that'd be super weird. That's true.
Speaker 3:I don't like that either. So You did good with pillars.
Speaker 2:Was that my idea? Yes. Man, if you're listening to this podcast right now, we're sorry. We we just don't even know what we're talking about. We're just 2 guys kicking it around.
Speaker 3:On a Friday.
Speaker 2:Just it is Friday.
Speaker 3:We're just Everyone's everybody else in the world's winding down. Mhmm. We are ramping up. You can hear the clicks of the roller coaster.
Speaker 2:Click. Oh, yeah.
Speaker 3:Click as we get ready to dive into this information.
Speaker 2:Yeah. It's
Speaker 3:gonna be so good.
Speaker 2:Alright. So purpose. John, what you are kind of the I don't wanna say the originator of IPC. Are you?
Speaker 3:Yeah. I
Speaker 2:mean, I'm sure it's been around a while.
Speaker 3:There's nothing new under the sun. Right? New. Right. Will tell you that working with teenagers through the years, I always like to simplify things, and I like to boil things down.
Speaker 3:You know, show me the the lowest common denominator. Right?
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 3:And so, honestly, the IPC kinda spring up out of just thinking about how I can process my own identity, my own purpose, my own community. And then if if I have a really good understanding of that, then I wanna be able to kinda see that in others. Okay? And I see that as progressive, meaning that who we are really matters. That determines what we do.
Speaker 3:And, goodness, it's it also an integral part is is what our community is, who we're who we're doing that with because we're not made to do a thing in and of ourselves. I mean, what what we do ultimately affects others, And as we're affected by others as well, we were we were made for community in our relationship with the Lord and with one another. And so that's where the IPC kinda came with came from, and that's why I think it's so important just to to remember these things when it comes to meeting a person. And as I like to think I mean, look. When I met you, it's the same thing.
Speaker 3:Like, I thought, okay. How does how does Zach hear? Like, who is Zach? What's what's Zach been built for? Like, what what is he he'd been created for, and is he ever gonna let me be a part of this community?
Speaker 2:That's sweet. We just had a moment? Did we just have a moment? We did. Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2:Last week, we talked about identity, who the mentee is, how God sees them. We talked about encouraging them. We talked about loving them just as they are and not as they should be. We talked about how our primary identity is child of God and how that's never gonna change. And so our mentees, they are image bearers.
Speaker 2:They the goal is to get them to see themselves how God sees them. And that is a really big deal. Once the identity is set, and then we move on to purpose. We move on to the question, why are you here? Why why did God make you unique, specific, beautiful in such a way that it's different from any other person on the planet?
Speaker 3:I've never known anybody or heard of anybody on the planet that hasn't thought about asked these big questions, right, of who am I, and what am I supposed to do?
Speaker 2:Yeah. Big question. What is and, hey, look. If you wanna get churchy about it, you know, it's like, what is my call? What has God called me to do in my lifetime?
Speaker 2:You know, those are good questions to ask, but I think everyone, regardless of if they have a relationship with Jesus Christ or not, they're kind of asking themselves, why am I here? And I think that's a great question. So I know that as a believer, we do have this general purpose. Right? Like, every believer has the call to love God.
Speaker 2:Every believer has the call to make disciples, to be humble, to love your neighbor. Right? And I do think that we need to focus in on that. Like, if you're not doing those things, then you're kind of missing the basics of what it means to follow Jesus. But what about the specific purpose?
Speaker 2:Like, I'm a Christian. You're a Christian. We're both following Jesus. But my purpose here on earth is radically different than your purpose here on earth, John, because we're different people. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Different environments, different backgrounds, different wirings. I mean, just I'm I'm 68. You're what? 5 I'm
Speaker 3:coming in I'm coming in at 511.
Speaker 2:46?
Speaker 3:Easy. 511. Easy. Now listen. I'm I'm getting closer and closer to the age of 50, unlike yourself.
Speaker 3:Yeah. You're cut you're probably moving in the opposite. You're just getting younger and stronger.
Speaker 2:Just like that movie. Was it Benjamin Button? Yeah.
Speaker 3:That's you.
Speaker 2:I am Benjamin Button.
Speaker 3:Life reverse.
Speaker 2:I was trying to make a point here, but I'm big. You're normal. Right. You skateboard. I play basketball.
Speaker 2:You are good at growing beards and building stuff and doing things with your hands. I'm more big picture thinker. I'm gonna sit there with my pipe and ponder the finer things in life. Yeah. Whereas you're just gonna go take a hammer to an old car and
Speaker 3:Exactly.
Speaker 2:And just hit it. Yeah. Just beat up that car. I say all of that to say that we have different wire wirings, different talents. God made us body.
Speaker 3:Yes. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yes. That first, different parts of the body. Talk about that.
Speaker 3:Well, that's it, man. Isn't it? I mean, think about it. I think in our humanity, we so struggle even as adults, but but even as teenagers. I mean, if you're questioning your own identity, you're questioning then you're gonna be questioning purpose as well.
Speaker 3:You know, you're you're if we're talking about the importance of what you do, but if you can't even really address the issue of of who you are to begin with, and that can be such a struggle. But even with that, I think that we have such a I think that we miss the boat sometimes on when it comes to, you know, maybe even the act of comparison. When we look at others and we see, like, what they've been made for and who they are, and then we look at ourselves and we think, well, we're not quite as good as that. We are not that. And so isn't that exactly what Paul was talking about with this understanding of, like, look, There are many parts of the body, and they're all needed.
Speaker 3:And so one part shouldn't look to the other and say, well, gosh. You're better than I am. But instead, we're connected.
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 3:And so this understanding of even the relationship of identity and purpose, I think it's so helpful for us to realize that that we're all needed. And I would probably say it's no more important in history than right now when so many lines are being drawn. Right? And I think so much comparison is happening that we say we really need each other. And, like, thank God that we are different.
Speaker 3:Thank God that we are wired in a different way because the kingdom of God needs all of these different types in order to communicate grace and love to one another and to serve each other.
Speaker 2:That's right. All the
Speaker 3:more important, I think, that we even if it comes down to as a mentor to a mentee just being a different type, that's really okay. We're not I don't think that we're called 100% to only relate to those who are like us. Okay? If you run a board out there and if I were to look at your board or running a nonprofit and and then look at your leadership, if I'm seeing only one personality type across the board, I'm thinking, you know what? You guys are gonna have some blind spots here.
Speaker 3:So I always with ministry and with leadership, I always valued those different parts of the body. Right? Because that's how we really have a better comprehensive look at what at what leadership is and what growth as an organization is as well. So it's it's vital to the church and I think to society as well to understand this and to get their to get this right.
Speaker 2:And all of us have a different representation of Jesus that we are presenting to this world. So you might be more creative. You might be more compassionate. And Jesus shows off His compassion through you. I might be more passionate.
Speaker 2:Well, Jesus shows off His passion through me. And I think it's our job as mentors. This is where I'm going to connect the dots. As mentors, what a great opportunity we have to unleash how the Lord specifically made your mentee so that they can make the greatest impact for the kingdom as possible. So it's our job, once the identity is set, hey, Minty, here's how God sees you.
Speaker 2:Let's try to get you to see yourself how God sees you. This is who you are. You're a child of God. All of these things. Once they know who they are, then it's, hey, this is what you were made for.
Speaker 2:And I just think that there's nothing more powerful on earth than a follower of Jesus Christ who is confident in why they're here on this earth and are intentionally walking out in their gifts to change their home, their community, their city, the world based on how God specifically made them.
Speaker 3:Absolutely.
Speaker 2:And, I mean, just like for example, if you as a mentor pick up that your mentee is good at math, okay, well, take that skill, take that talent, and steward it well so that they can become an accountant that can one day advance the Kingdom of God in their own unique way. If they're good at sports, okay, let's take that talent, and let's say, hey, God made you this way on purpose. How can you give Him glory through sports? And I just think that if we can help our mentees figure that out, figure out why they're here on Earth, figure out their skills, figure out their vision, figure out how to go and live on mission, then that's gonna make a tremendous impact on our communities.
Speaker 3:Absolutely. And, you know, remember, sometimes it's not as obvious. Right? Because I've I know that I've had a student in my student ministry or someone that I've been able to spend some time with, and it's not always as obvious maybe what their gifting is or maybe what their preference is. Right?
Speaker 3:And so when you're sometimes spending some time with with a mentee who is a little bit less obvious of what their interests are, you know, how they're gonna kinda connect, how how are they gonna serve the Lord if they have a hard time kinda thinking about, well, I just I'm not really into this and I'm not really good at that. So the more time that you spend with that person, that's I think when that when some of that mining comes into play, meaning that you're you're digging a little bit deeper and you're you're seeing some things as you're gonna present here or as we're gonna talk about pretty soon with vision, right, as a mentor, as we help to kind of discover some skills that then kind of reach their fruition in in action. And that's kind of how purpose is is displayed or how it's kind of carried through. I think what's really important is to be able to identify some of these things that that maybe you don't really see, but it's there for for the potential is there. And that that does go to into some of that vision that we have as a mentor where we go to the Lord and say, hey.
Speaker 3:I'm really having a hard time being able to give this kid kind of a handhold, something that they can be encouraged by because they're you know, I tell them that they're valuable. I tell them that God loves them, that that they're made in his image, and yet they kinda struggle to know, well, how do I worship or how do I live out my purpose because I just don't really connect with anything. You know? Again, if the kid says, well, I'm not really good at anything, so what do I do? You know?
Speaker 3:And that's where we say, well, goodness. As I've spent time with you, I see a heart of compassion. You know? You're really a sensitive person and you really care about these people. So, again, that's a real easy way for them to be encouraged as they minister and serve someone else.
Speaker 3:Again, things can kinda develop even over time as you spend time with your with your mentee.
Speaker 2:Yeah. If your mentee is a good public speaker, it's easy to say go and become a preacher. If they're a good singer, hey, go and lead worship. But what if they're a good computer programmer?
Speaker 3:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:Right? Or what if they're a good artist? Or what if they're good at math? Well, as mentors, we get to kind of connect those dots and be like, let's get creative, and let's figure out a way to take your unique specific talent. And how can we set you on purpose to use that to better your community, to better your family, and to impact, or and to advance God's kingdom as well.
Speaker 2:So Definitely. It's a big deal. So today, we are going to be talking about purpose, and underneath purpose, how to kind of figure out what your mentee's purpose here on earth is. We're gonna be talking about 3 things. We're gonna be talking about vision, which is why are they here on earth?
Speaker 2:What is God calling me to do in my lifetime? Gonna be talking about skills, which is helping them identify their personality, their gifts, what they're good at, and then how to give them tools and knowledge and to create a safe environment where they can kind of sharpen up those skills. And then, lastly, action. How to help them live on mission for others.
Speaker 3:So vision Wait a minute. Don't mean to cut you off here.
Speaker 2:No. No, please.
Speaker 3:Are you telling me that there there are sub pillars under this one pillar?
Speaker 2:Yes. What does that mean? It's not sub pillars. Maybe they're like posts holding up the pillars.
Speaker 3:Okay. So each pillar is made of no. We have no. I don't I don't wanna dig dig us a hole here.
Speaker 2:It's almost like a tent stake.
Speaker 3:Oh, okay.
Speaker 2:You know, like
Speaker 3:So the pillar of purpose is actually comprised of the 3 posts. Oh, geez. Okay. We're getting Vision, skills, action is if I'm hearing you right.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Well, you came up with these, so you might be hearing me say them, but you made them. I don't
Speaker 3:know if I did.
Speaker 2:You did. We talked about this morning. Okay. Over text, you sent you sent over the Oh, yeah. Emoji with the lightning bolts.
Speaker 2:Yeah. And I was like, hey. What was that?
Speaker 3:I'll text you guys. If y'all could just read. If y'all could be the fly on the wall of our text.
Speaker 2:Guys, it here's how serious this podcast is. I sent John a text at, like, 9 o'clock last night. Hey, man. Wanna do a pod tomorrow? And you're like, yeah.
Speaker 2:Here's some things that we should talk about. And now we're here.
Speaker 3:Yeah. So Just imagine if we spent weeks Gosh. Actually preparing today.
Speaker 2:It'd be so much better.
Speaker 3:So much better.
Speaker 2:Okay. Here we go. Let's hop into purpose here. John, I'm gonna read a sentence, and you you tell me what this means. Awesome.
Speaker 2:Okay. A clear purpose results in satisfaction and accomplishment.
Speaker 3:A clear purpose results in satisfaction and accomplishment. Yeah. Alright. So I want you to get this this narrative of just maybe a little bit closer to home. Let's say it's your family.
Speaker 3:Okay? You're a parent. I'm a parent. When we think about what parenting looks like kind of in the early years, you're you're doing a lot for that kid. Right?
Speaker 3:You're meeting needs, and you're not asking a whole lot. I don't know about you, but but, you know, when my son started walking, I didn't say, okay. Hey. Don't forget on Monday, I need you to take the trash out. Okay?
Speaker 3:That would have been inappropriate. However, we all get to kind of a time in our parenting years where we realize that not only am I am I to do these things for this person, not only am I to meet their needs and show them that I love them by kinda constantly serving and giving, but also there's there's a certain time when we get get to kinda turn the corner a little bit and we say, you know what? In order for this person to realize just how valuable they are in this family, I get to do a really special thing as a parent. I'm gonna give them a responsibility. So what I was able to do with my let's just say with with Levi, I was able to say, okay.
Speaker 3:Listen, on Monday trash comes, so remember I need you to get the trash out to the curb. There's something really important about that. Something really important about giving that sense of responsibility. Now could I continue to do that for the rest of my years and his? Absolutely.
Speaker 3:However, when I give that responsibility to my son, I'm I'm telling him this is how you're valuable, and this is how you not only serve yourself and show your worth and your value, but, also, this is how you get to serve the rest of us. And so it it cannot be overemphasized, I think, when it comes to showing care for someone that when you give them a job, it really speaks to their heart in a way that that that can't be met by continuing to buy them more things, right, or continuing just to kind of see to their needs. There's a need in in in all of our hearts, and that is for the need of purpose. And so as a family member, as a parent, that's what you would do. As a mentor, that's what you can also do because as it says, their purpose results in satisfaction and accomplishment.
Speaker 3:There's a sense of pride when you do something. Right? And so if I know who I am and I know what I'm supposed to do and I do that thing, well, guess what the result's going to be? I'm gonna feel good about it.
Speaker 2:Whenever you do something and you can see that you're adding value, that makes you feel really, really good.
Speaker 3:It does. That's a good thing. Yeah.
Speaker 2:I love that. And by us clearly defining purpose for our mentees, we can help them accomplish that that feeling of, wow. I'm I'm a part of something bigger to myself. And without me, that thing that is bigger doesn't work. Exactly.
Speaker 3:You know, let me also just kinda say a word to anybody out there who's like let's say you're a youth minister, and I think that a lot of times that the that we're tempted to spend the week kinda getting our bible studies ready. Let's say it's a Wednesday night, you know, you get your game ready. Maybe you're gonna feed everybody that night. And so what you do with your programming is you have all these elements ready, and then the kids come in the door. And then it's almost as if you're just kinda keeping them engaged by giving them good things for their head to think about out of God's word, giving them fun things for their bodies to do, you know, during a game, and then, like, maybe even feeding them.
Speaker 3:So you're meeting their needs, meeting their needs, meeting their needs. And then what what do they do at 8:30? They all leave. And what you hope for is that they had a good enough time and they got enough out of it so that they come back next week. But what about this idea of saying, hey, you guys don't forget anybody who can be here on Tuesday night, we are gonna go around and we're actually going to be painting the youth room.
Speaker 3:Okay? And you're thinking, that's a terrible idea. Who on earth would want to to come and paint a youth room? You're not giving them a praise band. You're not giving you're not you know, maybe you feed them, but they're not they're not gonna be entertained at all.
Speaker 3:But the cool thing about that is is that on Sunday morning when the kids that did come to that Tuesday night thing and they painted, you know what they're gonna do? They're gonna walk into that youth room, and they're gonna look around with their hands on their hips, and they're gonna nod, you know, that that special dad nod after they look back on the on the grass they just mowed, and they're gonna be, like, I did that. You know? And every week they're in that youth room, the beauty of this is they're gonna say, I remember when I painted that youth room. You know, that that is what's called investment, and investment goes a law a long way and a a lot farther than entertainment does.
Speaker 3:And so we get to apply that in our family life. We get to apply that to the mentor mentee relationship as well.
Speaker 2:It's okay to ask your mentee to help you and to give them something to add value. Absolutely. Even though the fear is I can't ask them to help me mow the yard. They won't ever come back. I can't ask them to help me, you know, fix this or do this.
Speaker 2:They won't like me. But really, you are helping them. You're helping build their self confidence, helping build their self value, helping them have a sense of purpose.
Speaker 3:Yeah. So you have something nice for somebody, and what are you telling them? You're telling them that they're valuable. Ask something from somebody, and what you're doing is you're telling them that they're needed.
Speaker 2:Mhmm. And we could put that on Instagram.
Speaker 3:That's good stuff. That's real
Speaker 2:good. Alright. So a lack of purpose results in what's that word?
Speaker 3:Degregation.
Speaker 2:Degregation.
Speaker 3:I'm sorry. It's not smart. 4 syllables, and it's
Speaker 2:Lack of purpose results in the degradation of hope. Tell us about that.
Speaker 3:The breakdown of hope. Right? Okay. Listen. What are we if not a people of prayer and hope as a believer?
Speaker 3:Right? We we communion with God, but, also, we are a people of hope. And what is hope? Hope is the substance of that which is not even experienced. Right?
Speaker 3:But it's something that we're that we're looking forward to. Okay? So we are a people of hope. What do we hope for? We hope for Christ to return and for all things to be made new again.
Speaker 3:Right?
Speaker 2:Yes, Lord.
Speaker 3:He came as savior first. He will come back as warrior. And so and he came as servant. He will he will come as as king. And so this is what defines us as as Christians.
Speaker 3:So when we think about the importance of purpose, I want you guys to think about the idea of of really what's taking place in a lot of prison situations and throughout history. How do you break a person? How do you really get to some to someone in order to be able to kinda break their spirit? Well, I don't know exactly what generation this was, but there was a time when I've heard this analogy before, and I think it's pretty pretty fun. Well, it's not funny, but it's interesting.
Speaker 3:The idea is get the prisoners out in the yard on Monday, and they have this huge pile of rocks. And you tell them, okay. Today's work is going to be you're gonna move this pile of rocks from this part of the yard over here into this part of the yard. Okay. They spend all day moving all these rocks.
Speaker 3:They're worn out by the end of the day, but they've accomplished this this this work. They go sleep through the night. Next morning, they get up. They brought them back to the same yard, and you know what they're told to do. Now move that pile of rocks that you moved from that location back to where they were the day before.
Speaker 3:And each day, they do nothing more but a menial task that doesn't do anything for anybody. So you get that? A a lack of purpose. If we're thinking that our life is meaningless. Alright?
Speaker 3:If we're living this kind of Ecclesiastes type of ideology of, you know, there's there's nothing good, and certainly that is not the overriding point of that that scripture. But this idea of, like, oh, there's just there's nothing new. There's nothing to hope for. There's nothing you know, why am I here and what am I doing? Well, that strips away your hope, and we want to be careful of that with our mentoring to understand that there are some people who are living without hope.
Speaker 3:And we have to remember that that ultimately and obviously there is hope as we are people of faith.
Speaker 2:I mean, if there's no hope, what is there? Like, you're you're just that's that's when it leads to depression. That's when it leads to isolation. That's when it leads to, what's the point? Not ever gonna get any better.
Speaker 2:This is the hand I've been dealt. There's nothing I can do about it. And just that and I I just think about so many kids today who just have no hope, just it's always gonna be this way. And that's a really sad thing
Speaker 3:to see. Absolutely. So we wanna combat that. Yeah. These these times are hard.
Speaker 3:Being a teenager is just hard anyway, but that is why it's so important that mentors who say, hey. Look. I know where you're at, but listen. I've been where you are as well.
Speaker 2:And it gets better.
Speaker 3:Got it.
Speaker 2:And we just jinxed each other.
Speaker 3:I did. Pinch poke, you owe
Speaker 2:me a Coke. I'm not putting that on Instagram. That's weird. Pinch Coke, you owe me a Coke.
Speaker 3:You know that. Right?
Speaker 2:No. Never heard that before in my life. Is that some kind of, like, weird thing from Houston?
Speaker 3:When it jinx when you jinx No.
Speaker 2:I just say it's a
Speaker 3:pinch poke, yummy a Coke. No.
Speaker 2:I just say jinx 123.
Speaker 3:That's what you do?
Speaker 2:Yeah. And then the other person can't talk until you eat, like, do something.
Speaker 3:Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's what they did on one part of the Mississippi. If you were raised on the other part, you pinched and poked.
Speaker 2:Okay. Pench poke. So how do we, as mentors, help mentees discover their purpose? How do we help them grow in confidence to, quote, unquote, kinda try on their purposes? Talk about that.
Speaker 3:So this is where we kinda go back to second Samuel with David and Mephibosheth. Okay?
Speaker 2:Who? David and and who? Mephibosheth.
Speaker 3:For a while, we had it up here on the board, and I always liked that, but now there's all kinds of really cool strategy stuff going on for your organization. Mephibosheth. You got it, Mephibosheth.
Speaker 2:Man, I've been saying Mephibosheth all day every day.
Speaker 3:That's so good. It's all
Speaker 2:I do. Just sit in my room and say Mephibosheth.
Speaker 3:So you'll remember David calls Mephibosheth into his presence. The first thing that he says, he he identifies him Mephibosheth exclamation point. Identity. Identity. That's it.
Speaker 3:But then what does he do next? He says, listen. You are the son of Jonathan whom I love more than anybody on the earth. And what you've been doing is you've been living your life in hiding. You have been living outside of your identity and and therefore you've been living outside of your purpose as well.
Speaker 3:So not only are you Mephibosheth, son of Jonathan, but you are Mephibosheth, the ruler. And so what I'm going to do is I'm going to reinstate the land and the people that are going to be under your leadership. And this is what's incredible because when you think about Mephibosheth's life at this point, he has been hiding out. Mephibosheth knows nothing of what it takes to rule the land or to rule the people. But here it's very interesting that David reinstates his purpose to say this is what you are going to do.
Speaker 3:So is David going to set him up for failure because he he lacks the experience and the and obviously the the confidence to do so as well? I believe that he does something really important and that is because as he says, in daily, Mephibosheth, I'm going to invite you to my table and we are going to eat together. And so when you think about what what David was doing there, he's he was in in turn saying, I'm going to show you what leadership looks like. You are going to struggle. I know you will, because you have no idea what you're doing.
Speaker 3:However, I do. And so I'm going to show you what it means to rule the people, what it means to rule the land. I'm not going to hang you out the dry. Instead, I'm going to give you a relationship. And that's how that's how a mentee gets to try on purpose.
Speaker 3:Right? That's how by taking on some responsibility, by being allowed to fail, and then and and being able to review just on a on a daily basis what that looks like.
Speaker 2:We, as mentors, get the chance to give our mentees opportunities, opportunities that they would never have without us. We get to present them an opportunity to step into something that is a little bit out of their league, but how else are they gonna learn? And then we get to allow them to fail. We get to give them space. Hey.
Speaker 2:I know that you don't know how to ride a bike, but I'm gonna teach you. And you're gonna fall down. But don't worry. I'm right here with you. When you fail, I'm going to be there to answer your call.
Speaker 2:I'm going to be there to pick you up. I'm going to be there to encourage you. I'm going to be there to process what you could have done differently. And ultimately, that is how they learn. They learn.
Speaker 2:They gain confidence. They gain value by doing something that they could never do at one point in their life. But now they get to try it, and they get to see, oh my gosh, I'm capable of more than I thought. Oh my gosh. I am learning so much through this process.
Speaker 2:Thank the Lord that I have someone who's helping me walk through it. That's great. That's it. David and I mean, I I just love that. Like, he puts Mephibosheth in a situation that he has no experience in.
Speaker 2:He has no reason to be in charge of people. But David says, hey, man, I believe in you, and whenever it doesn't go how you think it'll go, we'll talk about it over dinner. Pretty good stuff. Crazy. So tell us how we know that someone's walking out in their purpose.
Speaker 2:How do we know when we've kinda quote unquote achieved this? It goes to our our 3rd point that we're gonna talk about next week, community.
Speaker 3:Yeah. Absolutely. Ultimate purpose really finds its sweet spot its sweet spot, excuse me, and how the community is affected by it. Right? Because our purpose is not just for ourselves.
Speaker 3:It's not just for us to be able to kind of flesh out our identity. But instead, I kinda always like to think about it this way. If we would imagine that our identity is the very foundation, okay, that our lives are built on, Jesus speaks of the rock. Okay? Then we understand that our our our purpose is that which is kinda built up.
Speaker 3:So you take a house, you have a foundation, and what you do on that, you put the walls up and you put the roof up. And so that's our purpose. What's really great is that the community is what resides inside that purpose. Okay? So if my identity is knowing that I'm a child of God, man, that is a that is a foundation that whatever storm comes by and blows off what's built on that thing, that identity is going to remain because that's eternal.
Speaker 3:Alright? But what I get to do is I get to spend time building up on that foundation, a structure that is strong and that is useful for the kingdom of God. And then what I would I get to do with that, I get to invite others into that. I get to serve others, and so they actually ultimately get to find shelter in that which God has kinda built my life around. And that's a really kinda special and cool visual to be thinking about, but it's the importance of the fact that ultimately our purpose as we are living our lives as God intended for us, it is it will bless others.
Speaker 3:It it's designed to, so we get
Speaker 2:to find community that way. Whenever you have your identity set and you're walking out in your purpose, you are going to impact those around you. You are going to make your community a better place, your family a better place. You are going to add value. That's a beautiful thing.
Speaker 2:Absolutely. That's why we're here, to be salt and light. Great. You got it. Alright.
Speaker 2:So, how do we do this purpose thing? We're gonna talk about vision, skill, and action. I'm gonna take vision for a second.
Speaker 3:Get it? Because I love vision. I don't know. But it it's a dynamic that I think kinda draws the the Mhmm. The listener's attention.
Speaker 3:Yeah. Like, something's changed here. Yeah. Zach is is bringing me in. He's he's close to my ear.
Speaker 3:He's breathy.
Speaker 2:Habakkuk 22, one of my favorite verses. That whole Habakkuk 22, Habakkuk 23, man, such a good little section.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And the Lord answered me, write the vision. Make it plain on tablets so that he may run who reads it. It's just we got to figure out what our vision is, what is God calling me to do, what's my purpose here, and then write it on the wall. Like, I put my vision. It's hanging on my wall in my office because I want to read it every day.
Speaker 2:Why? So I can run. I can run to what the Lord has for me. Proverbs 2918 says, where there is no prophetic vision, the people cast off restraint. Some, it even says, the people perish.
Speaker 2:Without vision, people perish. People die. And so, we have to figure out what is God specifically calling me to do in my lifetime with the hand that he has dealt me, with the skills that I have, my experiences, all of that good stuff. And what a great opportunity we have as mentors to help our mentees figure out their vision, God's vision. Right?
Speaker 2:I I have a plan for your life. A plan to do what? To help you prosper, not to do you harm. So how do we do that? Well, we ask a lot of questions.
Speaker 2:We can ask a ton of questions. And I understand that this is going to be harder to do if your mentee is younger, because, like, you're not going to hang out with your mentee who's 6, and be like, hey, tell me God's calling your life. Right. Then he's gonna be like, you know what? I feel like I'm called to the mission field because of how I'm wired.
Speaker 2:But so this this might be something for some of the older mentees, but you can start to see where I'm starting to go with this. Definitely. What are your mentee's core values? Like, what does he or she believe at the core of their heart? What are they super passionate about?
Speaker 2:What is just if if you do this to me or if you, you know, if you go against this value that I have, it's just going to rock my world. Like, I am going to be either really offended by it. I'm not going to let it go. This is going to really impact me. What if they, you know, follow Jesus, if they are in God's word, what's their life verse?
Speaker 2:Like, what is the verse that really speaks to them? Is it talking about the poor? Is it talking about the fatherless? Is it talking about the orphan, or is it talking about the widow? Is it talking about da da da?
Speaker 2:And so if you can see what kind of grabs their attention in scripture, then that might put a kind of a spotlight on maybe what their purpose is.
Speaker 3:So something for the mentor to consider. Right? Yeah. For sure. In themselves, if they have a life verse Yeah.
Speaker 3:That they would communicate that really kind of speaks to that.
Speaker 2:All of this is also like, hey, mentor. You can't give what you yourself don't have. So if you don't know what your specific purpose here on earth is, then, you know, I I think that there's an opportunity to have you try to figure that out. Yeah.
Speaker 3:The tour guide has to be what he's showing off. Right? You're not doing that remotely. So they're only going to go where you're taking them.
Speaker 2:So, like, here's my vision statement. So I've created a vision statement, and this is what I believe is my purpose here on earth. This is how I'm specifically wired, what I'm supposed to do. In here, you'll kind of hear some of my passions and pursuits. You'll hear what I'm going after.
Speaker 2:You'll hear some of my dreams. Right? And my mentor helped me walk through this whenever I was 27. Okay? Now, over the last 13 years, I have changed it over and over and over as I've grown, as I've had kids, as I've changed jobs.
Speaker 2:But there's a couple of things in here that have never changed. So I'm a strategic visionary who is called to be a father to many. Like David, I'm a creative worshiper and a shepherd who is a man after God's own heart. I believe relationships change lives, first with Jesus, then with others. My mission is to raise up 10,000 fathers through intentional mentoring and discipleship.
Speaker 2:I'm passionate about investing in the servant leaders who invest into others. I add value through guiding others to overcome obstacles and encouraging them to see themselves how God sees them. My delight is to, as a husband and father, to see my wife and children, both physical and spiritual, flourish in their identity, purpose, and relationship with Jesus. In all things, I go where the Holy Spirit guides me by modeling servant leadership, vulnerability, and humility by staying near his presence, being thankful, and walking in faith. In that vision statement now, keep in mind, whenever I first made it, it was about 3 sentences long.
Speaker 3:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:But the Lord in his kindness and through the help of mentors and people who know me well, they have helped me really expand this.
Speaker 3:Awesome.
Speaker 2:But you can hear my core values. You can hear like, there's there's a couple of things in there that sound a lot like scripture. You can hear my passions. You can hear my pursuits. If someone asks me to do something, I can go to my vision statement and I can say, is that somewhere in there?
Speaker 2:This vision statement gives me a clear example of what my purpose here on Earth is, and that gives me the ability to say yes to some things and to say no to some things as well. And so what a great opportunity we have as mentors to, 1, do this for ourselves so we can live a life on purpose for a purpose, but we can also help our mentees figure this out as well.
Speaker 3:Absolutely. And that's so similar. It's interesting that you mentioned your vision statement as mine is a little shorter. It's that I wanna rock and roll all night and party every day.
Speaker 2:Uh-huh. I don't know
Speaker 3:if you've heard that. It's kinda based on a verse, or is it John. Where did you hear that? Maybe a limerick?
Speaker 2:I just got so deep with my vision statement, and you come back with that.
Speaker 3:I'm sorry.
Speaker 2:Steven would never do that.
Speaker 3:Steven would never do that. I thought we said we were not gonna mention that name. I'm just kidding. Steven, I'm really looking forward to us being able to have a fall retreat.
Speaker 2:Steven, I love you. Alright. Here we go.
Speaker 3:If we don't say something to Steven or or send to Steven Steven a shout out every time that we sit down, I feel like we've failed him.
Speaker 2:We have. Most definitely. So there we go. Okay. So that's that's vision.
Speaker 2:That is, in my opinion, the first part of purpose.
Speaker 3:Awesome. Yeah.
Speaker 2:And that points right to skills. Because the truth is, if my vision is something that I don't have skill for, it's just not gonna work. You know? Like, if my vision was to create a movement of fasting and intercession, Well, I'm not good at fasting, and I don't like to intercede for people. So if my mission was to create a a soccer league, I I just feel like the Lord wants me to use soccer to advance the kingdom.
Speaker 2:Well, I'm terrible at soccer. Every time that I play soccer, I always tear my ACL. Okay? Those those your vision and your skills and your passions and how God has wired you, those things have to line up. Right?
Speaker 2:So we've all been given some skills, some talents, and it's our job to take what the Lord has given us and to steward it well. So how can a mentor help a mentee figure out his his skills, his gifts, his personality, what they're good at?
Speaker 3:Yeah, man. This is where the rubber meets the road. Right? And absolutely, we can get real flowery with our vision, and we can make it sound great.
Speaker 2:Which mine sounds great.
Speaker 3:But it's but it's really powerful, like and those words that you use, you know, again, I say this a lot with handholds, but that's what I hear. That's the same thing with with middleman wanting to do those, just understanding that every word that we use to describe the organization needs to have some power and and understanding and be able to to to make it make sense. So skills, when we talk about what we're doing, I think that this is really where it's important to think about this. And I I haven't really asked you about this, but I wanna kinda pick your brain. What do you think about this idea of work as worship?
Speaker 3:Work as worship. I think that we have a funny relationship when it comes to work, the word work and maybe our job. Right? And this is really what we're talking about with purpose. It's it's occupation.
Speaker 3:It's it's what we're occupying our time with. Right? Based on who we are, it's what we do. So, I mean, look. What was the first occupation?
Speaker 3:Can you just tell me what was the in in the history of mankind, what was the first thing that that a person was was told to do?
Speaker 2:What was my first occupation? It was working at Tom Thumb. Is that right? Yeah. Are you
Speaker 3:a soccer? Yeah.
Speaker 2:I was a soccer. Awesome. But what was Adam's?
Speaker 3:Yeah. What was his job?
Speaker 2:To cultivate the land. Right? He
Speaker 3:was to name the animals Yeah. And he was to work the garden. That's right. And then he worked to taunt them. So work was a blessing before it was a curse.
Speaker 3:Right? Yeah. It was given to Adam and Eve to say, look. This is what you're going to do, and this is how you will be blessed. And, please, here here are your parameters.
Speaker 3:But after sin entered well, listen. You'll work and work, and you'll you'll work against. Not no longer is the land going to work with you. It's going to work against you. Okay?
Speaker 3:But what do we have a relationship with in now in how we think about work? Because work can can honor God in so many ways. But but how do we feel about it? Well, what what do we do? We we say that we're gonna work this many years, and then we're gonna retire, and then we're never gonna have to work again.
Speaker 3:Right? We say things like, what's the saying that find something you love, and you'll never work a day in your life? You know, I I have a real I have a real problem with that statement, because I believe that that work can be a really beautiful thing and that we've given it over. We've kind of handed it over to say, well, gosh, what we wanna do is we just wanna relax or we, you know, we wanna do what we wanna do. Right?
Speaker 3:But when it comes to, well, we wanna do what God wants us to do, that involves work, and work is a really special and beautiful thing. The work of our hands, the work of our minds, this is where purpose is really fleshed out, and this is where skills is found when we give a kid the opportunity to learn how to do something, to be exposed to something. And maybe maybe they don't love it. Maybe they don't automatically connect with it and say, well, yeah, this is definitely what I wanna do the rest of my life. It still gives them some perspective, and it gives them some some experience.
Speaker 3:And I think that can be a really, really special thing.
Speaker 2:And it's great for a mentor to be able to point out a mentee's skills because we all have these things in life that just come naturally to us. Like, it might come really easy to you, John, to fix a car. For me, it's like it's the hardest thing in the entire world. But you don't know if the thing that comes naturally to you, such as fixing a car, you don't know that that is unique unless someone says, hey. Did you know that not everyone can do that?
Speaker 2:Hey. Did you know that what you're doing right now is actually really hard, but you're making it look really easy? And then the mentee can be like, what? Oh, wow. I'm I'm different in a good way.
Speaker 2:I'm I'm kind of special. Like, this this might be my thing. Right? Absolutely. And so a great question to ask our mentee is, hey, what comes really easy to you?
Speaker 2:What comes naturally to you that might not come so easy to others? That can be physical. That can that can be mental. Like, one of my best friends, he's just good at math. Like, I had to study for algebra 2, like, 10 hours a night, because I just did not understand it.
Speaker 2:It was like Chinese to me. But for him, he could literally sleep all day in algebra 2 class. Wake up, take the test, and he made a 100. And I was just like, dad, you rascal. But it's like, what you as a mentor, hey, mentee, what are the things that come naturally to you?
Speaker 2:What are the things that others who know you best say about you? Like, if you're if you're a natural leader, I'm sure you've heard that, kind of, your whole life. Hey. You're you're a natural leader. You're a natural leader.
Speaker 2:You heard it in 3rd grade. You heard it in 7th grade. You heard it in 12th grade. You heard it in college. You heard it as an adult.
Speaker 2:And so, like, we as mentors, we can help draw that out. Whether it's through, like, just observation or calling it out or encouragement or personality tests, such as like the Enneagram, the strength finders, all of that stuff. We get to really kinda like what we're seeing in a podcast a couple couple weeks ago, we get to mine for that gold. So And
Speaker 3:let me ask you this, Zach. Do you kinda have the same feeling about practice as, like, Allen Iverson does? Is that kinda your is that kinda your thing? Because we're
Speaker 2:talking about practice.
Speaker 3:Right. Like, you know, when we talk about talents and gifts, just as you've mentioned a couple of times, I think that's really true. It's like, what comes naturally? Okay. What do you what do you have a pre predisposition for?
Speaker 3:That's one thing. But also, what about the other side of that coin? Like, what are you not good at? What are you not naturally predisposed physically or mentally? And sometimes, you know what?
Speaker 3:I think that might be the most interesting thing to consider because to say, I think that the human nature thing is and in a lot of personality types is basically, look, if I'm not good at it, it doesn't make me feel good about myself, and so I don't want to do it. But what about some of those all important things that say, you know what? I'm not really good at this naturally. It means that I'm gonna have to spend time on it, and I'm going to have to be consistent with it. And it's kind of the old saying that, you know, the the more practice I spend, the more talented I am.
Speaker 3:Right? There's sometimes nothing but just being consistent and really working at it, and and think about the accomplishment of that because there's one kind of accomplishment when you live out something that you're just kinda naturally good at, but there's the other one that you've once you've really put in the time that says, man, you know, 6 months ago, I was nowhere near as good of whatever I I can do now. And so there's something to be said for that that daily grind and that encouragement and that equipping that we can do as a mentor to say, hey, man. I know you're not you're not getting this, and I know you're not enjoying it, but have hope. You know, you will.
Speaker 3:It will come. It will come easier, and and that's kind of a cool thing. It might be playing a musical instrument, something athletic, or a concept in school.
Speaker 2:Yeah. For sure. It's a both end.
Speaker 3:Absolutely.
Speaker 2:I think we get to help them steward their natural giftings, but then we also get to help them identify maybe some things that they aren't naturally gifted in, maybe some of their, quote unquote, weaknesses Yeah. And help turn those weaknesses into not weaknesses. Definitely.
Speaker 3:Is there is there anything that you can think of, like, in your life that that you would say and I don't know if this is true for you because you're naturally good at everything that you ever do. But has there ever been anything that you weren't necessarily good right off the bat, but you still liked that thing? You still enjoyed that thing?
Speaker 2:Mhmm. I would say being humble.
Speaker 3:Wow. Went right to it, didn't you? I'm just kidding.
Speaker 2:No. I am I am naturally not good at details. Like, when it comes to reply and just like the things that come off the top top of my head is just executing a to do list or just like staying on top of things, having a calendar, being organized, things like that. Just naturally not good at that stuff. But I realized pretty early on, if I can't at least be competent in those things, I'm not going to have a job.
Speaker 2:So there's that. But, yeah, I mean, there are a number of things to where it takes all of my strength and all of my might just to be a little bit below average. Yeah. So that's okay, though. You know, that's life.
Speaker 3:For sure. So
Speaker 2:alright. So you said this this sentence, and I'm gonna let you expound upon that. The key to helping mentees discover their purpose begins with distinguishing it from their identity.
Speaker 3:This is really important because as as I would say, I believe that our purpose is built on our identity. Right? Those walls go up on that foundation. However, if we're not careful, those 2 can be confused. Alright.
Speaker 3:So here's what I get to do now. I get to talk about did you go see Top Gun Maverick?
Speaker 2:Of course, I saw Top Gun Maverick.
Speaker 3:Okay. Listen. I wanna I wanna confess to you. I've seen this movie multiple times. It's been out in the movie theater for, like, 3 years now.
Speaker 3:Right?
Speaker 2:It's 4 months. Did you
Speaker 3:know it's still there?
Speaker 2:Yeah. It's awesome.
Speaker 3:It's still in the movie theater, and people are still going to see this because it's great. It is a great movie. Now here's something that's interesting. If you remember, when Pete sits down alright. I'm calling him Pete, but you know him as Maverick.
Speaker 3:When he sits down with Iceman, do you remember him saying, being a a fighter pilot being a being a being a pilot is not just what I do, he said, but it's who I am. You remember that scene? Yeah. And he says, listen. The Navy needs you, Maverick, and Rooster needs you.
Speaker 3:And then they hug, and it was a beautiful scene.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 3:This is speaking into that issue right there because what you find is Maverick is confusing his identity for his purpose. And wasn't that some of the some of the main conflict in the whole movie when he was gonna be grounded? When they were saying, listen, your purpose is under fire here, Maverick. You we don't need you to fly jets. But in essence, what he's saying is, but listen, if I don't fly a jet, I'm not even I'm not even who I am.
Speaker 3:Mhmm. And this is the danger because that is a temporal identity. Alright. Now listen. I'm not I'm not throwing any shade on on the best movie ever made.
Speaker 2:Okay? Would you say it's the danger zone? Woah. I just made myself laugh.
Speaker 3:That's really good. I'm gonna let I'm just gonna let that marinate for a moment.
Speaker 2:That was so funny. That was good. Okay. I'm so sorry.
Speaker 3:That's what happened time that's what really happened time and time again. Right? There is there's this sense of a lot of people living out their purpose wound up with a confusion of their identity because when that purpose is taken away because they've wrapped up their identity in it, so is their identity. They don't even know who they are because they can't do what they feel like they were made to do. The healthy relationship of this is to understand that as a child of God that can never be taken from me.
Speaker 3:So as I'm living out my purpose and let's say that I say, well, you know what? I'm going to I'm gonna get a job in this church. Okay. That's gonna be my my role. Well, that job can be taken from me, but does it mean that my faith is taken from me?
Speaker 3:It doesn't. This is what we need to remind our mentees in understanding that there's a difference between their identity and their purpose. Purpose can be affected, but identity can never be taken away.
Speaker 2:And, like, that's why whenever you have a high school student or someone like that who tears their ACL, but all they've ever known themselves as is a basketball player or as a soccer player. Right? That's why it's so crushing to them. Because it's so much more than just a torn ACL. But now it's like, I thought I was this.
Speaker 2:This was my identity. Now what? Right. It's a big deal. That's the danger zone.
Speaker 2:Just gonna keep going back to it. But, like, what a great I mean, this this this really is the foundation. This is such an incredible gift that you can give your mentee is to have a secure identity that can never be taken away no matter what hap Now, once that is set, yeah, let's let's figure out your purpose. Let's cultivate your skills. Let's figure all of these things, but let's never forget your identity.
Speaker 2:Let's never forget who you are. Hey. Someone once said this. People like to call themselves by their identity. I'm a teacher.
Speaker 2:I'm a leader. I'm a pastor. I'm a this. Someone once said, why don't you say, I'm a Christian or I'm a believer. I'm a follower of Jesus Christ who happens to teach, who happens to lead, who happens to pastor a church.
Speaker 2:I know that that's weird, but if you think about it, it really makes a lot of sense because one thing can be taken away, and one thing can't.
Speaker 3:Right. Christian is never an adjective. Right? I've been called a Christian skater a lot of my life, and I think that was always I I always would correct that
Speaker 2:because I don't
Speaker 3:think it's a matter of semantics. I do think it's very true, and that why would I choose to say that I'm I'm describing myself as a skater, as a Christian skater, you know, or a a Christian band, you know, or like a Christian chicken sandwich that's not open on Sundays, where I say, no. Actually, who I am as a as a little Christ can't be taken away. And so I'm yeah. As you mentioned, I'm a I'm a Christian who happens to ride a skateboard.
Speaker 3:Skating can certainly be taken away or be pretty sad, you know, or looking to see a 50 year old out there at the park.
Speaker 2:So tell me how this ties into our main man David and his boy Mephibosheth.
Speaker 3:Well, again, understanding that he was able to identify Mephibosheth for who he is and then reestablish his his job, his role. Right? So understanding that there was a difference and that identity was that much more important. So, again, based on who he was, then, okay, well, now we're gonna reestablish what you're going to do. The do comes after who you are.
Speaker 3:It drives it. Right? Identity drives purpose. So it is the very foundation.
Speaker 2:And once your identity is set, which that might take a while. I mean, I don't know about you, but I still sometimes forget my identity. And I'm almost 40. Like, I it's a it's a daily reminder because this world wants to tell you who you're not. This world wants to break your identity.
Speaker 2:It wants to take it. The world wants to say, you are what you do. And the most important thing is for us to be solidified on our identity. And when we are off when we get off it, to know on our identity. And when we are off when we get off it, to know how to get back on.
Speaker 2:But then, once we realize our purpose, why we're here, how God has uniquely created us, uniquely gifted, wired, put us in situations, environments, families, to help us advance the kingdom in our own unique way. Once we know that purpose, why we're here on earth, then we can start doing the action. Then we can start impacting our communities, impacting our families. We can live on mission and for other people. So the last part, once you have figured out your vision, once you've identified your skills, now it's go and do.
Speaker 2:Go and live on action. Right. So To to
Speaker 3:to actually live on purpose. Right? To understand that your days are ordained, and what a what a special thing that is. And I think that for some that can kinda be kinda be overwhelming, but to know that living out your purpose means living with intentionality. Mhmm.
Speaker 3:And even intentionality in your rest. Right? Even intentionality, like, in your fun, all of these things, like, they're all important. They're all valuable. Going back to my situation, like, with working in the church, it was interesting that I remember throughout kind of my career of church leadership that there were always folks that I was really quick to find the people maybe in the church who wanted to make sure that I was fulfilling the responsibilities of the role.
Speaker 3:Right? And, like, that on Tuesday, I was in the office until, you know, 5:30. There were some real clock watchers back in the day. Right? But what was interesting too was I never really quite found the people in my life who were coming to me to say, hey, John.
Speaker 3:I just need to make sure that you're taking your Friday off like you're supposed to. You know? And that is just as much a part, and so I would always want to encourage those in those type of roles to say, hey. Make sure that you're as that you're taking as serious your days on, you know, that you're also being very intentional with your days off, with your time of rest, and with your time away because that kind of fortifies your on time.
Speaker 2:It does, for sure. You get to help your mentee cultivate vision. You get to point out skills, and then you get to say, hey. Here are opportunities. Here are jobs.
Speaker 2:Here are open doors to help you apply those things to your community. This is how you can impact others based on your unique wiring, your story. Here's how you can live intentionally. Here's how you can live on purpose, for a purpose, on mission. All of those things.
Speaker 2:And what a great job we have as mentors to help mentees apply these things.
Speaker 3:Absolutely. And this is also maybe where we start to kinda have to be a little bit more creative and to say, okay. Look, if I'm spending time with this kid and I know kinda what they might want to be able to try out, then it's it's maybe you that's getting online, maybe getting on the phone to say, hey. Is there an opportunity that could you use a teenager that would come in and maybe work on that that art piece that you guys are working on the community or or something else like that to kind of be the advocate, right, to to be able to say, hey. I made some calls, and I want you to talk to somebody here who who has an opportunity for you.
Speaker 2:There might come a time whenever you say to your mentee, hey, I'm still gonna hang out with you. I still love you. I'm still here for you. But to help cultivate your skills and to help you live on purpose for a purpose, I'm gonna introduce you to my friend who is an actual artist, or who's an actual basketball player, who's a computer programmer, who's a singer, so that they can really sit underneath a different kind of mentor. What a great chance you have to use your network, use the people that you know to give them jobs, internships, apprenticeships, different mentors.
Speaker 2:And I don't know about you, but as a mentor, there's nothing more satisfying than watching your mentee live the life that they were created to live. To see them live out on purpose for a purpose. Like that is where you, as a mentor, get to sit back and say, oh my gosh, Lord. Look at what you've done. That's amazing.
Speaker 2:And I think that that should be man, I hope that every mentor gets to experience that. I know that that is kind of rare, and that's special. But, man, what an awesome thing to aim for. As a parent, I can't wait to see my son married, having a job, living his own life. You know, that is the ultimate win for me.
Speaker 2:I hope that that happens. And it should be the same thing for all of her mentees as well. It's great. Alright. IPC, identity purpose.
Speaker 2:Next week, we're gonna talk about community, purpose, vision, skill, action. Stay out of the danger zone.
Speaker 3:What else did we talk about? I think that sums it up, man. It's great.
Speaker 2:Alright. Gon. Awesome. Great job today. If you enjoy this podcast, please share it with a friend.
Speaker 2:Feel free to holler at us. Social media, email, zach@youcanmentor.com. Stephen with the PH at youcanmentor.com. We really wanna hear from you. Is there anything that you wanna talk about?
Speaker 2:Do you wanna be a guest on the pod? What's your favorite part of Top Gun Maverick? You know, we just wanna get to know you. So share it, holler at us, rate us, all of that good stuff and remember,
Speaker 3:talk to me goose, you can mentor.