Cinema PSYOPS

Violet, Judy, and Dora Lee, the employees of a sexist, egotistical, lying, hypocritical bigot named Franklin Hart Junior find a way to turn the tables on him.

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What is Cinema PSYOPS?

Cinema PSYOPS is a weekly film review podcast where we experiment on an impressionable mind to find out why physical wounds heal, but Cinematic ones don't.

There is very little time or point in an explanation. To be

blunt, the audio came from a timeline and dimension that has collapsed

at a quantum level, rendering it null and void in terms of existence.

Operational time in the dimensional continuum where the beings that

created the audio collapsed in on itself, rendering all of their

civilization, including technology, null and void.

Timelines across the entire continuum are collapsing and

changing. The destruction has a nexus that centers on cinema.

Psyops.

Ten years. Man 1010 years.

Ten years. Man ten years. Ten years.

1010 years. Ten years.

What is the most likely way humanity. Will be wiped out? Maybe it's something from

space. Or us. Although the way the world ends might be because of

you. And if this is the case, you wouldn't have any control over it.

The global temperature rise underscores a chilling reality. Our planet

is trying to tell us something, but we don't seem to be listening.

A recent study has suggested that one. Third of annual deaths due to heat

are directly related to global warming.

On top of the initial flash of thermonuclear light, which is

180 million degrees, which catches everything on fire in a

nine mile diameter radius. On top of the bulldozing effect

of the wind, all the buildings coming down, and more fires igniting

more fires on top of the radiation if they happen to have survived poisoning people

to death. On top of all that, each one of these fires creates

a mega fire that is 100 or more square

miles.

Timelines across the entire continuum are collapsing and

changing. The destruction has a nexus that centers on cinema psyops.

A breathtaking scientific revolution is taking place.

Biotechnology has been progressing at stunning speed,

giving us the tools to eventually gain control over biology.

Solving the deadliest diseases, while also creating.

Viruses more dangerous than nuclear bombs. Able to devastate

humanity. It's man returning to the most

primal, violent state as people fight

over the tiny resources that remain.

What if the world we live in. Is just a dream or a simulation?

Whether it's a dream or some advanced computer game you are playing

right now, now, when it ends, you would be what causes the end of the

world. Please, do us all a favor. Continue dreaming or playing

this game of life. Because when you wake up or unplug, there's a

chance the rest of us will be blaked out of existence. Timelines across

the entire continuum are collapsing and changing. The destruction

has a nexus that centers on cinema. Silence.

1010 years.

Ten years.

And welcome to the 476th consecutive

week of cinema psyops. This episode represents 476

consecutive weeks in our decade of dimwitted dip

shittery. And joining me in my own personal dimwitted dip shittery is my

dimwitted dipshit of co host Matt. I'm tired.

Exhausted.

16 months or something. Yeah. Considered hibernating.

It seems like a good life strategy. I think I can cover that.

Yeah. To quote Tom Petty, I'm tired of myself.

Tired of this town. Yeah. Tired of myself.

Tired of this. I never realized. Tom. I never

realized how much Tom petty sounds kind of like Bob Dylan.

A little bit in the way he sings. Until you just did that. A little

bit. Sometimes he can. Yeah,

because you're impressed. Although he's way more understandable than Bob Dylan

is. Yeah. Your. Your impression of Tom Petty sounded like

Bob Dylan to me. Because it was off key, like Bob Dylan often is.

Well, I mean, you don't have to be an asshole.

No, but I choose to be because I like to be, and that's who

I am. And I just can't help myself. You just can't help yourself now?

I can't. It's not my fault, Matt. I can't help myself. It's not

my fault. I refuse to take any blame for anything

that I've ever done because I'm a narcissistic prick who only thinks

of himself. Well, it's about time you omitted it. Now go

get another tattoo. I'm putting in the work,

getting the tattoos. I'm talking to my therapist. That's not therapy.

I wish you'd stop. No, I was trying to make a parody, but I didn't

want to get into the point where I start using the line that gets used

against Daphne Coleman's character in nine to five about being a sexist,

egotistical, lying, hypocritical bigot. Right. Like, I don't want to be any of

those things. Yeah. Right. One thing that nine to five has definitely shown me

is that I don't want to be any of the men that are in nine

to five. For the most part. No. Or else you will die. It's not necessarily

that I will die. It's that I probably deserve it. People want to kill.

You also will deserve it. I mean, Daphne Coleman

is the absolute worst. Absolutely. But there's an indictment of

all men in this movie that's going on that kind of stings a bit

because it's a little accurate. Yeah, right. On top of that,

nine to five is a really excellent treatise on why capitalism is awful,

pure and simple. Yes. And shows you how we need

more unions so that people aren't taking advantage of in such ways.

Yeah, I'm glad that you have that attitude because the

music for the pirate radio edit this week is actually going to be.

Well, I'm going to feature nine to five somewhere in there because it's Dolly

Parton. Of course I'm going to feature it, but the rest of the music is

also pro worker, pro union and stand

up to the boss music. So we're going to have some worker solidarity going on

with this episode because how can you talk about nine to five and not.

Right? Yeah, right. No, yeah, you're exactly right. Some of the policies

that get enacted in the movie whenever the right

people get put into charge that increase productivity and actually

make people, you know, happier and work better workers,

that's declared socialism in this country. Like all of the things that they are

supplying. And we'll get into it when we get there. But Jesus fucking Christ,

this movie becomes more and more relevant the older, I guess.

Yeah, right. I mean, it stays relevant for all the messages it

gives for the downtrodden. Yeah, it never wasn't

relevant, but it becomes more apparent to me just how relevant

it will remain until things change, if they ever do. I don't know. Climate change

has probably caught up to us and this is the mode that we're going to

die in. It's end stage capitalism for us altogether. Yeah,

but hey, fuck it, let's. That's why I drink.

That's also why I do drugs. Yeah, well,

not drugs. I ingest farm bill, legal hemp and

hemp byproducts. Thank you,

lawyers. Unless I'm in a state where it's

legal to do said drugs, and then I do those drugs in that. And then

you're definitely doing those drugs. Yeah, yeah, definitely. Only in that state

where it's legal. Where it's legal, never. Where it's

illegal. Because we would never do stuff like that. Never ever

do such a thing that I would like proved in court. Never ever

do things like that. I can make declarative statements that

are absolutely true, but still not really answer the question, as in,

I would never admit to such a thing. Yeah, right. Never. Why the

mafia? Answer to things. I would never admit to such a thing. Yeah,

never. All right. What I will admit to is absolutely loving

nine to five. This was totally my pick. Although I'm sure Matt is absolutely a

fan as well. I can already. Oh, I love it. Yeah, I can't wait to

actually talk about nine to five. So let's stop fucking around and let's get into

it. What do you think? Let's get to it. All right, so up first from

the pirate radio edit for this week, the pro union, pro worker,

anti boss job is dead. Kennedy's cover of take this job and shove

it immediately following this. This will keep us quiet. Hello,

Matt, this is counselor Dan. Dan Chenille. I was just listening

to the show. And what do I hear? You don't have impression of me?

Oh, no. Why would you do that? Not only

is it confusing to your. Listeners, but also to my beautiful wife,

Melissa. And Chenille, she couldn't understand how I. Could both

be in the house and. In the studio at the same time. I took a

half a box of. Wine, some candles, two and a half hours of

yogurt, and me having to do something that I'm not all that comfortable with.

Oh, no, please. In the future, concentrate on

your own show and not terrible impressions of yours truly.

Thank you. I just feel bad for Millicent Chenille if she really does get

that obviously confused whenever, you know, you're doing your horrible impression.

That sounds like. Sounds definitely good. I just don't know what to say about

that. That I really don't know either. Instead of leaving me voicemails about my impression

of you, which is actually very funny and flattering, trying to sit there

with my family and enjoy my only vacation, I get.

And I get this guy blowing up my phone. I know. I've had a word

with Shamir. Oh, good. The shaman's real chill. That's why

counselor Dan is just a counselor and not a shaman. It's so very true.

And luckily for us, Shaman Shamir calls the shots. And he

said he's going to basically make counselor Dan suck it up. And the way that

they're going to do this is he no longer will listen to the episodes at

home with his wife. Good. Hey there, cort Matt,

we have some bad news for you.

We've gotten a bit of a complaint, and actually a potential client,

or Asian of ours, if you will, has had a traumatic experience and come to

us because of your foul language on your podcast. He was in tears,

and we think it's high time you cleaned up your act. You should be

ashamed of yourselves. Now, Counselor Dan, shaming them

is not going to make this any easier on any of us. You're right.

But he does have a point. Boys, you've taken swearing to a whole.

New level of filth. I mean, do you think your Andrew dies, Clay?

Do you think you're Sam Kinison? That's a relevant thing, isn't it?

Come on, boys, clean up your act. Why can't you be more like

that. Nice Bill Cosby. That's a bad thing

to say, counselor. Dan, you need to read the papers. I don't trust the

papers. They tried to send me messages. We need to have you reconditioned.

Dan, would you step into the crystal chamber here? You're right,

Charlie. Beer. You're always right. That's right,

Dan. Now, listen, fellas, now that he's gone, just between you and me,

I don't care what you say, but seriously, if you're gonna send clients our

way because of your filthy mouth, you could at least make sure you refer us

more during the show. If you can get the

entirety of take this job and shove it into a minute and 25 as quickly

as the dead Kennedys can, it's gonna be a song I play in its entirety.

I'm just gonna do it. Of course. Why the fuck not?

Yeah, at least on the pirate radio edit I'm going to. Otherwise you're gonna just

hear some other kind of needle drop music or something else that I've experimented

with, using AI to make music or something weird like that. We'll see. We'll figure

out whatever else you got going on in this world. Yeah, whatever bullshit I end

up throwing in there instead of actual copyright music that could get us to strike

for wherever the main feed releases.

Exactly. All right, well, speaking of things that will eventually get us a copyright strike,

let's cover nine to five.

All right, the first third of the movie starts with a sequence of people rushing

to get ready for wage slavery, as the song describes the plight of those crushed

under capitalism's unending hunger for their labor. That also happens to feature

in the title of the film. Film you can teach a person all

they need to know about what a bullshit scam working actually is

under capitalism. With this song alone, for sure. Yeah.

We watched Jane Fonda's character arrive to her first office

job ever, and that is also our first clip. But, Norman,

she has never worked in her life before. I thought you'd be sympathetic.

I am sympathetic, Norman, but please, why do I have to train

her? Let her work in someone else's section. She's very willing and

she needs the job. She's recently divorced and so. And I'm a widow.

Jerry should never have died. I'd be better off. I could have divorced

him. Is that her? Yes. We're gonna need a special locker

for the hat this week. This is quite a day for

me. I bet it is. I was so excited. I left an hour early so

I wouldn't be late. Uh huh. I'm certainly glad I did. It took me 45

minutes just to find a parking place right here. Well, we parked

inside the building. I'll show you how to punch in. And I just moved to

a new apartment near the airport.

Hey, Violet. What it is? Oh, hi, Eddie. What do you hear about your promotion?

Nothing right now. Eddie Smith, Judy Burnley.

Judy starts work today. What? Look,

how am I ever going to get out of this mail room prison. If they

keep hiring people from the outside? Lady, you're going to

hate it here. Judy.

Okay, now, we're on the 12th floor. Above us is the executive suite,

where the president, Mister Hinkle, is, and the chairman of the board. Come on.

Twelve. Oh, it sounds so big. It is. I've been here twelve years,

I've never even seen the chairman of the board. Twelve years.

All I've done is be a housewife. Oh, I wanted to ask you

about my salary. I don't think I can. Very touchy subject

around here. You have to take that up with our boss, Mister Hart. Oh,

I'm sorry. It's all so new. Don't worry, you're gonna get the hang of it.

Then you'll really be sorry. Come on.

Well, welcome to the front lines. Uh oh,

here comes General Patton. Violet. Just a moment.

Come on. Just a moment, Violet.

Oh, yes, Roz. So sorry. I have been meaning to talk to you about Mister

Hart's rules on office decor. We seem to be getting a

bit lax in your section. Oh, really, Roz? How?

Well, I have typed it up here. No coffee

cups on the desks, no personal items left in view.

Photos, plants, etcetera.

We mustn't look cluttered or sloppy. An office that

looks efficient is efficient, as Mister Hart

says. Oh, hello. Judy Burnley. Roz Keith.

Roz is Mister Hart's administrative assistant. Judy is starting today.

Oh, it's nice to meet you. How do you do? Welcome to Consolidated.

I hope you enjoy it here. Thank you. We're all a pretty happy bunch.

I think so. Here, Violet, you can put this up on a bulletin board.

Thanks, Roz. I know just where to stick it. Good. And Judy, if there is

anything I can do to help you settle in, just drop on by.

Thank you. One thing you should know about dear Roz, she is the eyes,

ears, nose and throat of Mister Hart. Anything she hears, he hears. You mean

she's a company spy? Sh. I wouldn't say that. I would just say that

if you want to gossip in the ladies room, I'd check first under the stalls.

For her shoes. Happy birthday, Myra. She and ralls are

like this. This whole section now is divided into three zones, each with

a supervisor, a senior. The other two supervisors report to me.

I report directly to Mister Hart. That's his office over there. He was just made

vice president. I have never seen anyone leapfrog so

fast to the top in my life. And I have the bad back to

prove it. Margaret. Anything serious? Nothing so far.

Uh uh uh. Margaret, please. Roz is on my case.

Sorry. I remember when he was just a management trainee.

In fact, I'm the one who trained him. What's he

like? I like to think,

Judy, if. If there is a word to describe my philosophy

of business, it's teamwork. Everybody working together. You girls,

of course, never got a chance to play football.

And I've always felt like that's unfortunate, because I think

it's probably the best place to learn what teamwork is all

about. I remember Coach Fry used to tell us, a chain is

only as strong as its weakest length. Its weakest length.

Come on. Dang it. Can I get this chair fixed?

Well, I. I'm not gonna bore you with a long harangue.

Just suffice to say that it is a jungle out there. But if

we all work together, we can cut the balls off the competition. Be sitting

pretty right on top of the hill. Thank you, sir. I'm happy

to be working here. Well, you're a welcome addition. And a damn pretty one,

too, if I might add. Thank you, sir. Now, I mean that. You should see

some of the crohn's that have been coming through here lately. Real pathetic, right,

Violet? Oh, Violet. By the way, my wife is coming by later on. I'd like

to get her a little present. Could you pick her out a nice scarf or

something? Mister Hart, we've discussed this before. I don't think it's my place to shop.

Violet, God damn it. You know, I've been standing up here for five minutes

talking about teamwork, and the first thing I know, you're not there for the handoff.

All I'm saying, mister Hart, is that my job description doesn't say anything

about making purchases for your wife. And all I'm saying is that I like people

around me who are flexible and get along. So when I ask an employee,

especially one who wants to be promoted to management, I expect a little cooperation.

Savvy? Savvy. Good. And we're talking silk, blue, maybe a little red

stripe. You're talking to the right person. Violet's the best.

First person I met at the company knows more about what's going on here than

anybody but Mister Hinkle. Oh, a deer.

Yeah, lucky shot. But, Judy, listen,

if you ever have anything of a serious nature on your mind at all,

I want you to feel free to come in here and talk to me about

him. That's actually why I have my office on this floor.

Is to be close to my girls. Okay? Certainly. Thank you.

Oh, is Doralee back yet? No. Oh, get me a

little coffee then, Violet. No sugar, just a little skinny and sweet. Yes,

sir. Well, that's Franklin Hart junior,

but to me, he'll always be f. Hart.

Oh, good, she's back. Hi, Violet.

How's everything going? Oh, Dora Lee, your boss wants coffee. Oh,

great. I just got back from gassing up his cardinal filling one tank,

I'm filling another. This is Judy Burnley. Judy's gonna be

working over in my section. Dora Lee Rhodes. Hi, Judy. Nice to meet you.

How do you do? Hope everybody's been treating you real friendly and showing you around.

Everybody's been very nice, thank you. Good. Listen, if there's anything I can do,

you just give me a holler, because I know what it's like to be a

new girl in town. Thank you. Judy,

over here. Now, this is your typewriter,

dictaphone, Eddie, machine. I better get your locker for that.

All right. This then leads into a sequence of Judy struggling

to work properly in an office environment for the very

first time in her life. And that ends that sequence with Judy joining the

ladies for lunch. There is some gossiping going on about how Dora Lee is

sleeping with Hart while the ladies are out shopping. And then we see Hart arranging

his desk to push his pencil cup off the edge. It's clear that that's what

he's setting up, doing and testing. And then he makes a call out to Dora

Lee in our next clip. Would you grab your pad and bring

your pretty face in here, please? Yes, sir. Hold it right there.

What? Turn around a second. Something wrong? I got something on my dress.

Nothing is wrong. Matter of fact, everything is very, very right.

Shall we begin, Mister Hart? Yeah,

um, take a letter to Vernon Henshaw over at Metropolitan

Mutual. Dear Vern, as you know, the chairman of the board of

consolidated Companies, Mister Russell Tinsworthy, spends most of

his time in Brazil working on the jungle

clearance operation. Consequently. Oh,

pencils. Yeah, it's all right. I'll get it.

Here, let me, let me. Let me help

you with those. No, that's okay, really. I've got em.

There you go, Dorilee. Yes?

About my conduct in the office here yesterday, I'm afraid I got a little carried

away. I'd just like to apologize to you. Oh, don't you worry

about it, Mister Hart. I've been chased by swifter men than you, and I ain't

been caught yet. Shall we get back to our letters? Well,

yeah, but. Well, could you just come over here

for a second? I have a little something for you. You know, ever since

I made that stupid mistake about the convention in San Francisco.

Oh, Mister Hart, you didn't make a mistake. You see, I'll just have to

make sure that the next time I'm asked to go to work at a convention,

that there is a convention going on. Right? Nothing happened anyway,

so why don't we just forget the whole thing? Han. Doralee.

You know, you mean so much more to me than just a dumb secretary,

so I bought this for you. I picked it out myself. Well, thank you.

You didn't have to do that. It's very nice. It's also very

nothing. Dora Lee, I'm a rich man. I've got a checkbook over

on that desk. You just say the word and you can write your own figure.

I could do that. Now, Mister Hart, I sign your name better than you

do. No, Dora Lee, I'm serious. Don't you understand? I am crazy

about you. You're all I ever think about. Mister Hart, I've told you before,

I'm a married woman and I'm a married man. That's what makes it so perfect.

Oh, Mister Hart. Dory, please. Look, I want you.

Oh, for heaven. I hate you. What are you doing,

Mister Hartley? Call me Frank.

Frank, what are you doing on the floor? Nothing. I tripped.

Hit my knee on the damn coffee table.

Did you hurt yourself? What are you doing down here? You know I hate

it when you come down here like this. You know that. Oh, now, Frank,

don't be mad at me. I just came from the travel agency, and they

have the most wonderful choice of cruises. Oh,

hello, Dora Lee. Hi, Miss Hart. How are you? I'm fine.

What a lovely scarf. Well, it's a present from your husband.

Oh, Frank, that was so thoughtful of you.

I'm just glad he appreciates you. Put it on.

Oh, it's absolutely adorable. And you

are so attractive. You're sweet. I appreciate that,

Dora Lee. That'll be all for now. You can just finish the letter later

on. Bye. Oh, Frank. Now, just let me show you these brochures. It won't

take a second. And you know, you did promise to go.

Right. Lovely one.

It's an italian line. Looks just like a love boat, doesn't it?

It does. Four weeks of sunshine. Four weeks? What, are you

out of your mind? You think I'm gonna spend four weeks of my life drifting

around on that boat? Well, I'll be damned. Just look

and see who got paid off her services rendered. That's.

That's the scarf you bought. Oh, who cares? I suppose she

deserves it. Come on. I bet you can't wait to see the Xerox room.

Now, all these rush memos are always done on regulation consolidated

letterhead. So you place it in here. Eight and a half by eleven. See that?

Close the bin firmly. Turn on the power.

Several people have lost their hearing in this room.

Select the number of copies, make this a little darker

and start the print. It's going to feed right here. Here it comes. Okay,

now, if anything goes wrong, just watch this panel machine. I'll tell you just what

to do. I think I can handle. Okay, I'll lead you to it.

We see, during the clip, he set up the desk to have her bend down

and try to look at her tits and pick up the pencil cup that he

was about to knock over. The approach he makes at her this time

is both far more disgusting and twisted than even the movie seems

to portray. This is extremely fucking wrong. Like, you can see that

while this is coded in the times of. He's just taking it too far.

You know what I mean? You get what I'm saying? They also just take

it a bit over the top and hint at how he tried to arrange for

them to stay in a hotel together for a convention that didn't exist. Exist because

he's trying to sleep with her and she needs the job, so she's putting

up with it. The fact that he could get away with this kind of behavior,

this excessively for this long. And she just deals with it because she needs

the job. Just shows how fucking disgusting things were for women

at this time. And it hasn't really improved as much as it fucking should.

Yeah. Right. And it's. Yeah, it's still probably pretty bad out there

for women, but it was definitely way worse back then.

Yeah. It's. You can tell just by looking at what was able to be put

on film as just an example of, you know, someone who. And how

much. Yeah. How he could keep getting away with it just because she

needs the job. Right. Like, that's just that fucking awful. All right, so the end

of the clip starts a sequence of Judy struggling with the copier machine. And not

knowing what to do with it and panicking. She makes some bad choices,

and things keep getting worse as she is literally buried in paper.

She is busted by heart and is unbelievably brow beaten

by him. As she justifiably breaks down at the end of that, he really

took it too far and is the worst fucking boss of all time.

Yeah, right. Just frickin horrible. We see Herbert

to her apartment. Where her ex husband is waiting for her with the finalized

divorce papers. That conversation is awkward, and we

see how civil they are trying to be during it. The movie

then cuts to Judy waking up and starting work again.

Some lady at the office is drinking on the job for quote unquote medicinal purposes.

And then Violet is the ultimate dispatching badass

of the office and doing that type of work. We see that she

basically is running everything. And other people get the credit. Which definitely

happens and almost undoubtedly happens to women

way more often than men. Oh, yeah, definitely.

Dora Lee attempts to make friends, but all the ladies resent her for

the rumors that Hart started. Or has basically started

in some way, shape or form. To try and get credit for something that isn't

happening. In our third clip, Violet Newstead, please hold. Violet Newstead,

please hold. Hi, this is Violet.

Mel. No, that's 210, net 30,

delivered in nine days. That's 2% of four 40, 550 is

80. 811. Oh, my pleasure, Mel.

Violet Newstead, please hold. Hi, this is Violet. Oh, Charlotte, I've got

it right here. I'm just waiting for your call. That route is

32 via Dixie Express.

Don't worry. I've got it under control. Okay, bye bye bye.

Oh, come on, kids. No. Come on. No fighting. Believe me,

there is more than one peanut butter and banana sandwich in the world. What did

I say this morning? Okay. Love you too. No, I don't want to talk to

the dog. Bye bye.

Oh, hi, Judy. How's everything going? Fine,

thanks. Hey, how would you like to have lunch with me today? Well, I'm afraid

I can't. Thanks. Well, maybe tomorrow. I know the cutest little italian

restaurant. Just a hop. Skip my jump. Well, I think I should stay

in the office and get to know the routine. But thanks anyway.

Yeah, sure. You know, I just don't get it,

Dwayne. What's that, honey? I'm as nice as I know how to be to every

single person down at that office. Everybody treats me like a bastard

at a family reunion. Well, come over here and sit down.

Well, that hurts my feelings. Where's my smile?

Tell you. You know, they're just jealous cause you're so pretty. Jealous?

Mm hmm. Now where's my smile? Now I want you to smile.

Okay, you forgot all about that. Cause I wanna give you a real warm reception.

Violet, little coffee? Yes,

sir. Yeah, what else? Did you have a chance to look at the

report I did on the color coding of accounts last month? I gave it to

you. We could improve efficiency by up to 20%. Color coding? Sure,

I looked into that, but that needs a little work. I mean, I'm gonna have

to get back to you on that. Okay.

Oh, Violet, I haven't heard from you. Did you get my mail?

I did, Roz. I tore right through it. Good. You know,

we must clamp down hard on any signs of unionization. Oh,

here comes Mister Hart with Mister Hinkle. Coming from you, of course.

Well, I mean, it means a lot to me. Hello, girls. How's it going?

Just fine, sir. Hello, Mister Hinkle. Raj, you'll be getting

a copy of this report Frank just gave me. We are going to start

color coding the account from now on. Frank done a brilliant study of

its efficiency. Thank you, sir. Really.

Congratulations, Mister Hart. Thank you, Roger. Just brilliant.

You're a fine piece of man power, Frank. Any other reforms

you want to make down here are fine with me. Well, thank you. This is

your floor. You'll run it as you please. Going up,

girls? No, we're going down.

Oh, I can't believe that man. He has no shame.

He stood right there, presented my idea to the president of the

company just like it was his own. Why don't you call me?

All because I'm playing it safe, damn it. In six

weeks, he makes the decision about that promotion. Until then,

I'm playing the good girl. You finished up there? Yeah.

Nice job. Thanks. Can you imagine a mature woman

with four kids installing a garage door opener?

He still refers to me as his girl.

Mom, gotta relax. I'm gonna

roll you a joint. Josh, you know how I feel about that.

Besides, your grandmother will pitch a fit if she even hears you mention the word

marijuana. Withstand moderation.

Besides, you're the one that keeps talking. About harm springs from excess,

right? Okay, yes, I know. I'm talking about one joint,

okay? I don't like it. Josh, how long have you been waiting for this promotion?

Slip it in my purse. It works.

I did it.

What? Now, let me finish, okay? And don't go flying off the handle.

You gave that promotion to Bob Enron instead of me. I've got five year

seniority over here. I know that. For Christ's sake, I trained him. I know that.

But, see, the company. Oh, the company. Bullshit. It's your

decision. You promoted him. You tell me why. Well, in the first place, see,

Bob does have a college degree. Oh, brilliant, brilliant. While he's away at

college getting his precious, useless degree, I'm working my butt off at this company.

And in the second place, he does have a family to support and I

don't. What has that got to do with anything? Violet, look, my hands are tied

here. The company needs a man in this position. Clients would rather deal with men

when it comes to figures. Now we're getting. I lose a promotion because of some

idiot prejudice. The boys in the club are threatened, and you're so intimidated

by any woman that won't sit at the back of the bus. Spare me the

women's lib crap, okay? Now, I know how you feel, and I understand it.

You understand zilch. I understand I'm still a boss here. And even

though you might be pretty valuable out there, you better get a hold of yourself.

I'm not gonna sit here and take this. God damn it,

Dolly, get in here. Okay, I told you six weeks ago to have this chair

fixed. Okay. Okay, I'm gonna leave. But I'm gonna tell you one thing before I

go. Don't you ever refer to me as your girl again.

What in God's name are you talking about? Doralita, what are we gonna

do about this chair? I'll tell you what I'm talking about. I'm no girl.

I'm a woman. Do you hear me? I'm not your wife or your mother

or even your mistress. What? I am your employee,

and as such, I expect to be treated equally with

a little dignity and a little respect. What do you mean,

mistress? Never mind. She's just a little upset. Darleigh, just come off, for God's sake.

The whole company knows you two are having an affair. Who's been saying we're

having an affair? Who's been saying it? He has.

What? Charlotte, where are you

going? I'm gonna get drunk. Atta girl. So you've been

telling everybody I'm sleeping with you, huh? No. Well, that explains it.

That's why these people treat me like some dime store bluesy. They think I'm

screwing the boss. That's not it at all. Oh, and you just

love it, don't you? Gives you some sort of cheap thrill like knocking over

pencils I'm picking up. Let's don't get excited. Get your scummy hands off

of me. Look, I've been straight with you from the first day I got here.

And I put up with all your pinching and staring and chasing me around the

desk. Cause I need this job. But this is the last straw. All right?

Now, wait. Let's. Let's just sit down and. Look. I got a gun out

there in my purse. And up to now, I've been forgiven and forgetting because of

the way I was brought up. But I tell you one thing. If you ever

say another word about me or make another indecent proposal, I'm gonna

get that gun of mine and I'm gonna change you from a rooster to

a hen with one shot. Don't think I can't do it.

Shit. Where are

you going? I need a drink, Roz. I'm taking the rest of the day off.

Attitude, girl. What do you want?

Can't you see I'm busy? I wouldn't disturb you if this weren't important,

but I just heard one of the girls commit a serious infraction.

What are you talking about? Maria Dalgona was in the ladies room speaking

to a girl whose voice I didn't recognize when I distinctly overheard

her reveal her salary and make estimates of yours and

mine. Get rid of her. Dismiss her. It isn't as if she hadn't been warned.

I clearly outlined in my. Didn't hear what I said. Fire the bitch.

What? I don't believe it. You were fired for that?

That's okay, Judy. I wanted to spend more time with my kids anyway.

But it's so unfair. We've got to do.

Sure, let's all revolt. No, no. Don't you get in trouble for me.

It's not worth it. I'll find another job. It was

hard for me to work full time anyway. I promised myself

I wouldn't cry. Oh. Where's Violet? Does she know about

this? Not yet. She's down at Charlie's getting drunk.

Well, I'm gonna tell her. This is a disgrace. Attic girl.

What a rat. What a ydev.

What a creep. I think he told everybody I was

sleeping with him. It's so unfair.

Just so unfair.

Twelve years of service and he shoots me down.

We've got to do something. He can't just treat people like that.

Do? What's to do? Quit. Well, I can't quit saying

all over anyway. Well, look, couldn't we just all get together and

complain? Complaint. Let's face it, we are in a

pink collared ghetto. Let's have another drink.

This one's on me. It's my turn.

I've got it. I've really got it. What's that?

Violet? I didn't think you smoked. Do you roll your own?

This is a gift from my son. Let's just

pop over to the ladies room and light up. Is that one of them marijuana

cigarettes? Shh. We don't have enough for everybody. Cool it.

Come on. No, no, we can't do that. Violet, come in. It is

dangerous, folks. Would you two show a little spunk?

I mean, what are you, a man or a mouse?

I mean, a woman or a wouse? Hey, why don't we go to my house?

My husband's out of the singing gig. We'll have the whole place to ourselves.

We could have ourselves an old fashioned ladies pop party.

You know, to tell you the truth, all that stuff really don't do that much

for me. I smoked a marijuana cigarette at a party once.

I could never figure out what the big time, what the ideal was. Huh?

Threatening heart with a gun. And he knows I've got one,

too. I keep it right here at all

times. All I can think, he must have peed in his

pants.

Have you ever fired it? Have I ever fired it?

Really? Just. Just once. Right after Dwayne bought it for me.

I was calling from this rodeo one night in Dallas with a girlfriend of mine,

and these two men started to hassle us in the parking lot, and they just

wouldn't let up. And so I was gonna be big because I had a gun.

So I reached to get my gun, and I shot a hole clean through

my parking.

But they ran off. I bet they did like

turkeys. Wow, this is.

This is really good pot.

What did you say it was called again? Maui wowie. Well,

I love it. It's primo.

I don't think I could ever carry a gun. I don't care. I don't understand

guys like hard who go out in the woods and shoot those poor,

defenseless animals like thumper and

that cute little skunk. I'd like to hunt. I'd like to

hunt hard. I'd like to chase his lily white tails in the woods and

see how he likes it.

I hunt you, Stone.

Am I stone? I think you're stone.

Oh, it's so funny. What's so funny?

Oh, I have this image of Hart running for his

life, and the whole office is out to get him and hunt him down.

And that clip right there takes us to the first third

of the film being done as the ladies bond over their shared hatred of

their boss, Hart. Well, nothing like some good old fashioned hate

of the boss, that's for damn sure. Yeah, well, he's a sexist, egotistical,

lying, hypocritical bigote. Yeah, totally. Completely.

Yeah. Typically the type of person that gets put in charge just because he's a

sycophantic fuck. Yeah. And we all can

hate him. And it's. He's a very hateable character, but the

actor who plays him is just great. The thing about Daphne

Coleman is he's the guy that plays this type of person a little too

fucking well. And you want to absolutely hate him, but, like,

in the end, you're probably like, no, he probably was a pretty decent dude,

at least. Because it's the ones that the opposite that aren't.

Yeah. It's always the ones who play that. You, who are really great at playing

assholes is, you know, you just is

usually the one that's awesome. Often be the

case. Yeah. You at least hope, but sometimes it's not. Yeah. And I don't know

enough about Daphne Coleman's life to be able to say, but he definitely never

took himself seriously because, Jesus Christ, you should see some of the

things he's in, like meet the Applegates or whatever. Yeah, right. Yeah. Where the

cockroaches try to take over the fucking world. He wears

a dress in that for, like, most of the film. And it's fucking hilarious.

Christ. And it's good

stuff all the time. Yeah. He has a decent sense of humor about it is

all I'm saying. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And what's that fucking kids movie

where he was like, the spy hero? Yep. I love that movie.

I watched that thing all the time. Yeah, but he was like a fantasy.

Spy, but also he was actually a toy.

Yeah, yeah. But he came to life and, like, protected the kid. And it was

really cornball and kind of a real Cornball kids movie,

but he had fun with it. My absolute favorite role of Daphne Coleman of all

time, playing an asshole, though, is in modern

problems, which I know is a Chevy Chase vehicle. And he's a horrible person.

But yeah, Daphne Coleman in that is absolutely hilarious,

where he's, like, constantly trying to be, like, this alpha male dude, which is why

it's so much funnier to see him and meet the Applegates or whatever the fuck

that was, because I'm thinking and picturing him from modern problems

being that character and meet the Applegates. And that makes. Makes it funnier to me.

I don't know why. Yeah, completely. All right, are we ready to move on.

Yes. All right, so the middle third starts with Judy's fantasy described in

the clip of the entire office hunting down heart. It reminds

me of the wolf man almost, where they are acting like villagers with hounds,

torches, pitchforks, everything to hunt him. And it really is pretty funny.

It still made me kind of chuckle a little bit. Yeah. And you really need

to kind of watch it. I'm not going to go through the entire description of

it because it is something that you need to see.

Also, Jane Fonda in that hunting outfit is a total thing for sure.

Like, yeah. Oh, yes. Judy is waiting for Hart

in his office in this dream of how they would like to hunt him

down and kill him. And that leads to our fourth clip. Who's there?

Hello, Hart. Looks like you've gotten yourself in a spot of

trouble. Judy. Judy, you've got to help me. That mob has gone crazy out

there. They're trying to kill me. Why would they want to do a nasty thing

like that? I don't know. I'm not such a bad guy. You're a sexist,

egotistical, lying, hypocritical bigot. So I have a few faults. Who doesn't?

Is that any reason to kill me? You're foul heart. A wart on

the nose of humanity. And I'm going to blast it off. Oh,

Judy, Judy, Judy. Goodbye, boss man. It's quitting time.

You can't mean this.

1234. Why me? I'm just an ordinary

guy trying to do his job. Seven. Eight. Nine.

Holy shit. Ten.

He darts off as she begins shooting at him. They pull a shooting gallery on

a midway kind of joke, with Hart running back and forth with a trash can

on his head before Judy starts shooting in different directions to

send him back the other direction, running back and forth. And then at some point,

they cut to Judy checking stalls in the bathroom. When he runs off, she finds

him trying to hide there within one of the stalls. There is then a gunshot

and a cut to his head mounted on the wall as it zooms

back to reality of the stone ladies fantasizing about

killing the patriarchy personified by heart. Yeah,

the ladies have the munchies after we return to them, and they are

so high. It all is so good to them. They keep talking about how

everything so tastes so wonderful. Each person is eating their own particular snack,

that they're talking about how great it is, and you can tell it's because they're

high, because Lily Tomlin's character talks about how tasty the olives are.

And no one thinks olives are tasty. Unless they're stoned. Yeah,

exactly. We then see the lady start talking about

Dora Lee's fantasy on how to kill the patriarchy, which is next. And it

involves her turning the table tables on heart and treating him like a soulless

piece of meat for her to sample, is now her method of terminating

him. She ends up sexually harassing him back. And while it may

be turnabouts, fair play, the character that's there is supposed

to be playing sweet and innocent, and it's still sexual harassment. And sexual harassment

is always wrong. It's always wrong. It is used

to show how she has been victimized by him. And they're doing

the inverse to show you, like, well, how would you like it? Men, more or

less, is how that's kind of going. But, I mean, it's. It's effective.

The way what they're trying to do, where they're trying to teach us a lesson,

but it just feels wrong. Like all watching, all sexual harassment is fucking

wrong. But you gotta let them. It is.

There is a big part of that. You have to. You know, you're. You're.

You are supposed to be learning something from this. Right? Well, it's also not just

nothing, but. Also it's a lifetime victim, or at least the entirety

of this job, being victimized as sexual harassment

and just wishing they could make him feel the way that he makes them feel.

Basically what this is all about. That's what the fantasy is all about.

That's what I'm getting at. It's just. Yeah, it's just this drives the point home

about the sexual harassment. And anyway, she goes right into

the victimizing, and it is, like we said, quite effective. This finally culminates in Dora

Lee roping, hog tying, and then slow roasting heart over a fire,

when he finally stands up to her and tries to run away. And then that

fantasy ends and we see Violet stream begins where she is

Snow White in the office and also has all the

animated woodland friends there with her. And she is asked to

get heart his coffee. So she does in her own princess little

style. It's a long sequence of her being the ultimate princess,

but also ends up poisoning Hart's coffee. It's very Disney

cartoon with it. And it's like my favorite thing from when I was a kid

watching it. I always loved it and thought it was great. And she does all

this with the help with her woodland friends. She hands him the coffee,

and that leads to our fifth clip. Your coffee,

Mister Hartley. Just the way

you like it.

More coffee, mister? Hart?

Coffee?

I think there was something in that coffee. I think you're

right. I think it was poison.

Right again. You did

it.

But why? Why do

you think?

Because I'm a sexist, egotistical, lying, hypocritical bigot.

Bingo.

Oh, man, that's funny. Yeah, that's good. Shit. At the end of the clip,

she does a cartoon throwing of him out the window by using a contraption

that's somehow in his office. Office chair that lifts him up to over the area

where the window is supposed to be. And it already has a handle to it,

which tilts back and then ejects him out the window. And they basically

free the castle, which is their office. And then the land of the tyranny

of the patriarchy. By doing this, they show the ladies rule the castle as princesses

in a tower. And the land is now somehow magically

healed and happy again. And is really kind of foreshadowing, with Lily

Tomlin getting her wish, essentially. More or less, yeah. I mean,

they're giving you the plot of the film from here.

They're letting you know what's up. Yeah. So it cuts from that

happy ending of them all being princesses in a fairy tale to all the

friends back at work the following day. And our 6th clip.

I had such a good time last. You know, we should do

that more often. How is old heart? I haven't seen him all morning. You know,

he didn't say a word to me about yesterday. He's too happy. His wife left

this morning on a two month cruise to the Southe. South Seas.

Lucky her. I don't know. She still has to come back to him,

poor thing. Let's have lunch today. Oh, I can't.

I gotta go shopping. We're running out of everything. Cat food,

fish food, ant spray, rat poison. Ann Hart wants me to

take papers to his lawyer. I'm gonna be gone all afternoon.

Oh, damn it. When you're away, that only means one

thing.

Coffee, Violethe. Now.

Yes, sir.

I swear, Betty, one of these days he's gonna push me too

far. And then I'm gonna really let him have it. I mean, enough is enough.

We're out of skinny and sweet. I know. I got some at lunch today.

What does he think he is anyway? A miserable,

petty, pit dictator, ordering me around like

I'm some sort of flunky. I get so mad at

myself. I mean, he's such a nerd, Violet. He just does

it to annoy you. Don't let him get to you. Besides,

the day's almost. You're right. I tell myself the same thing.

But Betty, inside, I can feel the pressure building up. I can't take much more

of this. Something, somewhere, sometime, is going to snap.

And then you gotta help Mister Hart, because I won't be responsible for my actions.

But right now, I'm calm. Perfect calm.

Yeah, that's why you don't say those kinds of thoughts out loud. You leave those

intrusive thoughts inside so that if you ever do act on them, you don't

leave a pattern of that type of suspicious behavior for them

to comment on. Yeah, right. You don't want any of

that. At the end of the clip, we see that violet, in her obvious

rage and her eagerness to get back to doing actual work

and not trying to be a servant in her about, has easily

mistaken the rat poison she bought for her home with the

sweet and low she bought for the office, because the

boxes do look very similar. She enters Hart's office with the

accidentally poisoned coffee. And that is our 7th clip.

No, not for 1 second. Right.

Hold it. Hold it a minute. Listen, I've already told Bob Enright in Francine.

Now, I'm telling you, next time you get anything at all from Ajax warehouse,

you bring it directly to me. Now, you got that? You're the boss. You might

remember that a little more often. See? He caught you.

I'm a tree. I can bend. Hang in there,

honey. It's almost 05:00. Now, you listen to me. Ajax is my deal,

so you get your money when I give it to you. And don't ever call

me at this number again. Sure.

Lee, you're late.

Oh, my goodness. Mister Hart. Mister Hartley.

Mister Hart. Mister Hart. Oh, no.

Oh, I'm sorry I'm late. Lila, where have you been? You've missed

all the excitement. What happened? They took Hart away in an ambulance,

unconscious. He had an attack or something. You did? Well, where's Doralee?

Well, she went with him. I hope it's not too serious.

Yeah, me neither. Well, maybe a little serious. Some trifle

that'll keep him out of the office for the next 20 years. Come on,

let's go. I gotta drop this off. I'll meet you at the elevator. Okay.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Violet. Isn't it awful about Mister Hart? How did it

happen, Roz? He fell and hit his head on the credenza.

What about the coffee? What? Where is the coffee

cup? Oh, here. It was by him on the floor. He must

have been drinking it when he blacked out.

What hospital. St. Anne Ambrose.

Oh, my God. I know how you feel.

Judy. Aw, Judy. Hurry.

Hurry. What's the matter? Something terrible's happened. You can't believe it.

Don't believe it. Violet. How could you make such a stupid mistake?

I thought it was skinny and sweet. Here. Look at the box.

They are identical, except for the little scarlet crossbones on the label.

Tomorrow. Crazy. Someone's gonna see you. I gotta get to the hospital. Tell them

what happened. They'll have to pump his stomach. Look, don't be hysterical.

Don't be hysterical. You're right. Keep calm. Keep calm.

You better speak to admitting, ma'am. Yeah, right. My boss was

brought in. Franklin Hart. There we go.

What's going on? Get easy. You blacked out. How do you feel?

I feel fine. I just fell off a chair and hit my head,

that's all. Quite a bumper.

I think we'll take you upstairs for x rays. X rays? Mm hmm.

Wait a minute, doc. I don't want any x rays. I like my hair just

the way it is. But we ought to do some tests and make sure you

do tests on yourself. I know what you guys racket is. You're not

gonna sucker me into a lot of hospital pills, doctor spies. Not for

a little bump on the head. Hey, doc. Cardiac arrest.

Stop breathing. Open up the shirt. Plug him up to the monitor.

123-4512.

Hurry. He's our only witness. We had

him all ready to testify. Now this mister.

Lee. Door. Lee. What are you two doing here? Dorley, something terrible

has happened. What? Violet put rat boys in in Hart's coffee. I didn't do it

on purpose. It was an accident. You mean. That's right. He looks just

like skinny and sweet. Good grief. Where is he? We've got to tell the

doctor. He's in the emergency room. It's the first door down on the riding.

They took him in. Oh, my God. There's a policeman.

What's he doing here? I don't know.

Hey, the guy that brought in on the gurney. How is he? He's not so

good. Well, when can I speak to the doctor? He knows you're here. Oh,

my God. They found out about it already. Oh, don't panic. Please don't panic.

How is he, doc? Oh, he's dead. Oh. Oh, my God.

Can you tell what caused it? Not without an autopsy. Fellas can come into my

office. I'm fairly certain it was some kind of poison. Boys.

Easy now. Why is that poison? Poison,

Violet. Well, it's all over. Did you hear an autopsy?

I might as well. Just save him the trouble and give him the rat poison.

Violet, are you crazy? You want someone to see him?

Who cares? I'm finished. I'm a murderer. No,

you're not. I'm a murderess. My poor kids. Violet,

you're nothing until proven guilty. You know they're gonna find the poison when

they do the autopsy on the body. I'm gonna get rid of the poison.

No. No. I'll get rid of the body. No, Violet, it's not murder. There are

extenuating circumstances. It was an accident. An accident? She was thinking

about doing it last night. We were all thinking about doing it last

night. But she didn't do it on purpose. Oh, maybe unconsciously I did. It's no

use. I'm gonna go to the pen. We better get her a lawyer. I'm gonna

be locked up for life. Where's the phone? Over there. Do you have any change?

I think so. I just sit right here. I'm gonna lose my job. Violet,

now just calm down. I'm no fool. I've killed the boss. You think they're not

gonna fire me for a thing like that? Hush. I just sit here. We'll be

right back. Oh. Medic. Is this the guy for

the autopsy? Yeah. Doctor would like to see you.

Right this way. The end of the clip starts a sequence where

Violet decides to steal what she believes is Hart's body. She escalates

the risk by putting on a doctor's coat to cover what she is

doing, or an attempt to cover what she is doing and look like official staff.

She is startled by some kind of candy striper while trying to sneak the body

out. More dialogue. And. God damn it, next clip.

Excuse me, could you tell me where the coffee shop is, please? What? The coffee

shop. The coffee shop. No, I'm new here. I don't drink coffee. I'm new

here, too. Where do you work? Downstairs. Mark. That's right.

Yes, yes, yes. How did he. Coffee. Too much

coffee. I'm just taking him out for some air. I mean, some fresh air for

me. He's just coming along for the ride. What? You're a doctor?

I didn't see your badge. Sorry. I'm a doctor. So why the

hell am I talking to you? Piss off. Oh, honey, I think

Violet has flipped out. Piss off.

The ladies see Violet steal the body during the clip, and we watch her load

it into her trunk and ditch the gurney in a very efficient

and creepy way. The ladies hop in the car with her

as she drives off, and their panic is obviously our 9th,

why are. You driving so fast? Look, I've got a great idea. They can't

do an autopsy without a body. I told you, she's flipped.

She has just absolutely. Where is the body? In the trunk.

Look, all we've got to do is get some cement blocks, chain him to his

feet, and pitch him off the end of the pier. No one will ever know.

You are crazy. They'll find it. They always find it. Oh,

crazy, am I? They never found Jimmy Hoffa.

Okay, well, you just slow down. Let's not panic.

Let's not panic. There's a restaurant up there. Why don't we pull over and

stop for a while? A restaurant? How can you think of food

at a time like this? I'm not thinking of food.

I'm not hungry.

Violet, we're not criminal. You're not a criminal. It was an accident.

Well, we're criminals now. We've just stolen a corpse from a hospital.

That sounds like criminal talk. We'll take it back. We'll just turn around

and take it back. Oh, we'll get taught. If we go back now,

you think they're going to listen to us? Would you two please stop arguing and

think about where we can lay our hands on some cement?

Look out. Don't panic. Don't panic.

What happened? She panicked. Nobody's hurt.

It's just a little accident. Be out here. The front

fender's hitting the tire. Oh, good Lord. Get out. Let's look at it.

Oh, that ain't too bad. We need to pull that fender out a little.

Here, come on, give me a hand. Wait, that that's no use.

We need a crowbar or something. There's a tire iron in the trunk.

I'll get it. Judy, turn the blanken.

Uh, Judy, did you come back here for a second? What? Look.

Who's that? I don't know. Where's Hart? I don't know. Oh, my God.

You mean she. Oh, my God. Violet, honey, would you come

over here for a second? What is the matter with you two? We have

got to get the. Who is that? I don't know. What do you mean,

you don't know? What happened to Hart's body? It's not here. What do

you think, it just got up and walked away? But I. Violet,

how could you? How could you? I guess I must have made a mistake.

Oh, you steal the wrong body from the hospital, and all you can say is,

I must have made a mistake? It could happen to anyone. Oh,

this is awful. So improper. It's so disrespectful

he's dead. He doesn't mind. Look, there is nothing to get excited

about. We'll just take it back. What? No harm's done. Come on,

let's turn around. We'll take it back. That's just great. We just waltz

in there and say we're sorry, we made a mistake. Well, maybe they'll give us

heart's body in exchange. There is no need to get sarcastic.

You took it. You take it back. No, no. Now, stop it. We're all in

this together. Now, we have to be very calm. We're gonna fix

the fender. We're gonna go back to the hospital. We'll figure out a plan.

Then we're all gonna sit down and very calmly decide what we're gonna do next.

I could. Sadist woman. What about. Will you two shut up?

Good stuff. Yeah. The absurdist nature of this is just fucking great. I love

the way that it escalates. After they get the fender in

enough shape to head back to the hospital, they drive off and have either

a tail light out or a short, causing the blinking. This attracts

the attention of the pigs. And the ladies try to remain calm when they are

pulled over in our 10th clip. Good evening, ladies. May I see your license and

registration, please? Why? I wasn't speedy. I didn't say you were. Your taillight

is blinking. It is? Are your signals on? No. Well, there must be a short

in the trunk. A short in the trunk? We've got a short in the trunk.

Probably just a defective wire or something. You want to take a look? Do we

want to take a look? No, we can't, officer. We don't have time.

We're on an emergency. That's right. She's a doctor. Oh,

you're a doctor. What do you think I am, a beautician? I'm sorry,

doctor. I didn't see your badge. What's the trouble? The trouble is I'm taking this

woman to the hospital, and she's very sick. Which one of you is sick?

I am. She is. They're both sick.

What is that you're hiding there? What, this? Yes. It's rat poison.

She ate what? She ate the rat poison. That's why they're sick.

You eat the rat poison? I thought it was skinny and sweet. It looks

just like skinny and sweet. Except for the little skull and crossbones on the label.

Can we go now, officer? I'm not feeling very well. My God, did you hear

that? She's not feeling very well. I've got a dying woman on my hands.

And you want to look for a short in the trunk. I'm sorry, doctor.

If we don't make it to the hospital on time, I'm holding you responsible.

Well, don't worry, doctor. I'll give you an escort. An escort he's going to give

us? That's an escort? Lord. Just hang on, ladies, and follow me.

I'll get it. Mack, we can't wait. How did

it go? I couldn't find that. A thing about heart. They either don't know or

they won't tell us. What are we gonna do?

Nothing. We're gonna wait until they come to us, go to

the office in the morning, and pretend like nothing has happened. Well, what about the

other matter? Don't worry about it.

It's been taken care of. They cut from this to a maid at the hospital,

finding the body in the the toilet and stating to a co worker that they

have another stiff in the john. The following work day, Hart is back, and nothing

seems to be wrong with him. The ladies go over everything

in the john, and it turns out that Roz was listening and taking notes on

toilet paper in our 11th clip. I mean, all that running around

last night was useless. Hart left the hospital with a little bump on

his head. I tell you, I did put the poison in the coffee. I know

it. Well, he. He absolutely did not drink it, Violet. I mean, how could

we be so stupid? Oh, did anybody think to look under.

Yes. Yes. And there's nobody there. Look, I propose we forget the

whole thing, right? It never happened. That's okay with me.

Cops and corpses. I'll never mention it again. Well, thank God it's Friday.

Hey, why don't we start the weekend with a drink after work at Charlie's?

You know, we are so lucky. I am so glad this whole mess is

finally over. Is this accurate? They actually said this? As clearly

as I can make out. My notes were a little fuzzy. Well, this is very

interesting. Stealing corpses, eluding the police.

Maybe they knew you were hiding, just pulling your leg. I don't think so.

In any event, I think you should be aware of that coffee business. Yeah,

I think I present to some advantage. Woo. Look out,

Charlie's, here we come. Oh, Judy, wait just

a second. I'll be right back. Okay, I'll tell Violet. It's 05:00.

Mister Hart, you wanted to see me? I did, Dora Lee. I'd like you to

come over to my house tonight. Oh, wait, now I'm not working tonight.

Mister Hart, this is Friday, remember? Who said anything about work?

Oh, by the way, have you ever heard of strychnine?

Strychnine is a poison, I think. Yes, it is a poison. I was just on

the phone to the hospital. Evidently, they found traces of strychnine

when they pumped out my stomach yesterday. What? I thought you told me

you just hit your head. I had to be sure because I think you need

evidence. Like if you're gonna accuse somebody of murder. Murder? Yeah,

you and Violet and that girl Judy tried to murder me yesterday. Put the rat

poison in my coffee. Oh, my goodness. I don't leave, Mister Hart.

It was all a big mistake. That's very good. See, you should be

scared, because I know all about it. Now all I have to do is pick

a phone, call the police. But it really was a mistake, Mister Hart. Violet put

the poison in strictly by accident. Oh, really? She might be

able to get a jury to believe that. And again, she might not. But I

think the big question here is whether or not you won't take that chance.

Just what exactly are you driving at? Well, it's very simple. You come over to

my house tonight and I'll just forget the whole thing. You are disgusted.

Yes. I don't know. Too bad. Mister Hart, I'm begging you,

think about what you're doing. I'm not the one that started this. It was you

three girls that did our plotting. Well, I'm not gonna let you do this.

There's another phone over there, Dorlee. Incidentally, that's something else

you might want to think about. You know, I'm very funny, but I don't like

it when people give back my presence. Oh, you are are rotten,

Mister Hart. Did anybody ever tell you that? I never thought I'd live

to see the day. I'd say this about another human being, but you are evil.

That's right. Evil to the core. I love man like that. And Mister Hart,

if you touch that phone, I'm gonna jerky clean out of the wall whether

you like it or not. Don't thank me. Shut up. Now wait

a minute. Can't you just let me loose her? I'm calling for help.

No, I don't want you to call her help, sir. You won't listen,

but you'll shut up and stay there. I gotta figure out what to do.

Roz, is Mister Hardy up? Yeah, well, yeah,

but he's. He's tied up at the moment. Oh, well, I guess I

can wait until Monday. Have a nice weekend. Yeah, you too, Roz.

Oh, Judy, can you come here second? You ready to.

No, something awful awful has happened. Where's Violet? She's in the

storage room. What's the matter? Hart knows everything about last

night. What? I mean, he really thinks the three of us

were trying to kill him. He was going to call the police and have us

arrested. Oh, dear God. Get in there and keep an eye on him.

You lock that door and don't let anybody in. I've got to get Violet.

Oh, dear God. Oh,

dear goddess.

Mister Hart, I'm so sorry.

What? Oh, I can't understand what you're saying.

Thank God one of you has come to your senses. Get me loose.

Doorley didn't mean any harm. Mister Hart. Just get me untied, okay? Well,

I can't do that until they come back. What do you think I'm gonna do,

run away or something? Look, I won't do anything. I give you my word of

honor. If you just get me untied. Okay? Come on. There's a little pain involved

here. Sorry. Well, maybe I'll just loosen it a

little bit. Good. Loosen it. Mister Hart, you've got to

understand. What happened last night, it was just a series of misunderstandings.

Yeah, Violet didn't mean to kill you. She just accidentally put rat poison

in your coffee. Look at Mister Hart.

Mister Hart, you gave me your word. I lied.

God damn it. You're not leaving this office.

That's me. You know, I was just pretending a while ago, but this thing is

getting out of hand. And nobody makes a fool out of me in my own

office. I'm calling the police. Hold it right

there. All right, guys, you're as crazy as the other two. Close that door or

I'll shoot. Curtis. Don't shoot. I give

up. Don't shoot. What are you doing? Don't shoot it. Don't shoot. Judy,

put it. Judy, what are you doing? Oh,

my God. He was gonna call the police.

The clip ends with the women kidnapping Hart and driving off in a panic.

And that is the end of the middle third of the film. So we

are now two thirds down with only one third left to go at this point,

my man. Oh, I mean, God, did he hate Daphne Coleman's character.

Yeah, he plays greasy and slimy so well. Especially.

It's really evident in that clip where he uses the fact that Judy

is somewhat of a downy innocent compared to the other two women.

She may have been like the type of woman who married her high school sweetheart

until he cheated on her and left her. And she's never really had to really

do anything for herself. And I don't think she's ever been allowed because sexism.

Right. What about this other lady who's the bootlicker?

Roz. Right. She's the fucking worst. Yeah. Just the fucking worst,

man. She team up with your people. There's always that

one person too, who's just like, nah, the cougar won't eat my face.

So, yeah, she's voting for the leopards eating my face party,

thinking that if she votes for them early, the leopards won't eat her

face. Yeah, yeah. But the leopards will eat your face. Yeah. That's what's

going to happen no matter what. Management is not your friend.

Middle management is not your friend. And if you are ratting

out everybody around you in the hopes of becoming friends with middle

management or management, all you're really doing is being a fucking bootlicker.

That's right. You might as well be a fucking scab because you're

disgusting. Yeah, you're gross, motherfucker.

And you try to teach this ethos to people at work and they just don't

appreciate it. Get you fired. Yeah. Yeah.

You try to help out people and then what happens? You get

horrifically banned. You get

a meeting call with your boss in HR.

For fuck's sakes. Yeah. I really like what this movie

is, is portraying and what's end up. What ends up happening here.

Obviously, this is the most extreme version of it,

but essentially this is what really does need to happen is women just

need to start taking control. Because once they do,

things will probably get better. Because all men have been doing is fucking it up

for centuries. So let's let somebody else give it a shot and see what they

come up with. Yeah, I mean, eventually, I don't know, fuck it.

And we're all gonna fucking die. It's too late for that now. But I mean,

it shows you what it could be in the utopia in this movie. Like with

fantasy. So let's go for it.

Go ahead and finish it off. What do you say? Let's do it. All right,

so the run to the end starts with the ladies pulling up into Hart's driveway

and unloading him from the trunk of the car in our 12th clip. So what

do we gonna do now? You pay for this. I swear

you'll pay for this, Mister. Hart, if you'd only listen. You listen to me.

I'll see you all in prison before I'm through. Kidnapping, attempted murder,

roped, beaten, rat poison. I won't rest until you all get 20 years

in prison. You understand? That's funny. Ass.

We have to do something. We can't just keep him here forever. Oh,

you hurt him. He don't believe us. He wants to prosecute. Well, why wasn't he?

He's got you for poison. Him and me for roping him, and you for acting

like he was first prize at a turkey shoot. Well, how are we gonna keep

him from talking? Well, I say we hire a couple of wranglers to go upstairs

and beat the shit out of him. We could only find something on him.

Maybe we could trade off blackmail. Oh, that sounds good.

What could we get on him? A sex candle. Take a picture of him in

bed with a prostitute. Oh, who'd care? Yeah, Hart would just

buy up the copies and send them out as Christmas cards.

We've gone over everything. Well, we might as well face it.

He's got us. We're licked. Wait a minute.

What's this doing here? What?

Maybe we do have something to bargain with after all. What is it?

An account book for Ajax warehouse.

See, there's something suspicious going on here.

Let me see that. But it's too dark. Let's run up to that

window. I think we got him.

I think we got him.

Yes, indeed. It looks like Frank has been a very naughty boy.

An empty warehouse? What's wrong with that? That's what Billy saw Este

said. And they gave him 15 years for embezzlement. That warehouse

is supposed to be filled with inventory from Consolidated. But you sold

it and you pocketed the money. You'll never be able to prove that.

Well, I'm gonna order the invoices from head office on Monday.

I think you'll see the light when they arrive. You start

tangling with me, you'd better be prepared to play very rough. Cause I'm not gonna

be stopped by three dumb witted broads.

I'm gonna get loose. I'm gonna break loose if I have to kill somebody to

do it. If we're gonna keep him tied up for three or

four days, we've gotta devise a better system of confinement.

Yes, something that limits his movement. But it should wear

well and be comfortable. This leads

to a sequence of dog carler harness and various other gear

shopping that culminates in a mega bondage suit that is ceiling

mounted to a garage door opener,

wire pull, taking all of the menace out of heart. And that

he may have had in any way, shape or form. Because with the touch of

a button, he's just lofted to the ceiling in this harness that just holds

him up like a child. There's nothing he can do to stop it.

Yep. Because it's a harness that is absolutely designed to hold you from the front.

Like that when you are parasailing. Like that's what. Or not.

Or, uh, hand gliding. Right. Like that's what it is. It's a hand glider suit

that it's all strapped to him so he can still do his business on the

toilet and everything. And. And it's locked in place.

He can't get out. There is a couple of spots where I noticed that they

were using, like, some crampons where if he would have really looked, they could have.

They could have just like, you know, done the little push the trigger and get

loose. Uh, yeah, on the crampon or whatever the clip thing

is that they call it, you know, the little clamps that they were using.

Yeah, the little clips, I think is the best word

for. Yeah. Yeah, the little clips that they end up using. I'm trying to use

the term that they're used for when they're rock climbing because I'm trying.

Yeah. I have no idea. Yeah, it doesn't. Fuck, I ain't going. I ain't

doing no rock climbing. No, obviously not. No,

that's not going to happen around here.

That's horseshit. But anyway, there's a couple spots where their design had flaws,

where they should have been using those master locks that they were using on a

lot of the other pieces. But it gets the point across and it definitely has

a heavy sexual bondage look to it, with all the black leather and the studs

and spikes. Yeah. Oh, Jesus Christ.

The ladies explain even more about how this works out in our

next clip. So we figure you'll sign our statement by the end of the week

and then we'll be able to let you go. Well, I got all the razors

and the scissors from the bathroom and all the glass, just in

case. I brought you some books and magazines.

This one is really good. This will keep you up to date on all the

daytime soap operas. Once you start looking at them, you really get

hooked. And I got your cigars. Judy, you'll be staying here at night.

Dora Lee will bring you your lunch. And in the daytime we have this little

security system. I paid for it on your master

charge. You three broads are out of your mind. You think you can keep me

here for a week, for Christ's sake, I'm the boss. Don't you think I might

be missed at the office, frankly? In Hart's office?

No, he's not here right now. Can I help you?

Yes, Mister Strell? Judy Burnley, please hold.

Judy Burnley, please hold. Hello? Judy Burnley.

Hey, Violet. What can I do you for? Bob, would you look at

this? I've checked all over and I can't make it out.

But Dora Lee, I want to talk to him today. Well,

I will tell him. He's not here.

He's not? Well, that's kind of funny. I thought he

was. Well, he hasn't gone to lunch. His coat still

here. Look at that. I have told him a hundred

times, this can be very dangerous. I'm sure he'll be back,

Roz, you want to just wait around here for him? No, no, thank you.

But please tell him it's very important I talk to him sometime today.

I will certainly tell him, Roz. She is going

to be tough. Hmm. What about the other piece

of cake? There were a few questions that we needed to answer for. Yeah,

I saw those. And a couple of letters I thought you should see. And other

than that, I think we're fine. Okay.

Did you want a cup of coffee? Oh,

sorry.

Sorry. During the clip, we see Hart trying to wiggle his way

out of the bondage. And then Roz is becoming an increasing issue for

the ladies at the office because she is dying to lick Hart's

boots. Yes. Art makes a weapon at the end of the clip and tries

to get after Doralee by breaking up the tray table.

And then he thinks he's going to attack her with it. She uses the garage

opener trick and hangs him up in the air, taking away all of his attempts

at being in control. Once again, they cut from this to our 14th

clip. I don't understand. Did you give him my message?

Well, yes, I did, Roz, but he left the office just the same.

But I bet you can still catch him. Judy,

do you see Mister Hart? Yes. Well, stop him.

Mister Hart. Mister Hart.

Mister Hart. Mister.

Oh, you just missed him.

We can't keep that up all week. You're right. She's going to be a problem.

Well, I've got some bad news. Here's the telex from

head office in New York. They started the computer

changeover. They won't be able to send us the inventory

invoices for Ajax Warehouse for another four to six

weeks. Four to six weeks? We have to keep heart tied

up all that time? Do we have a choice? Yeah, I think we can pull

it off. I really do. I never realized how unpopular heart is,

but nobody wants to see him face. To face except Roz.

What if we sent Roz on vacation? Yeah, but that's only. Only two

weeks. We've got to keep her away longer than that. Hey, have you ever

heard of the Aspen language center? It's one of these places that gives you

very concentrated lessons in foreign languages. Why don't we send her there?

You know, that's not half bad. We could get Hart to write her that it's

top secret. Consolidated is opening overseas centers, and they need executives

who can, I don't know, speak French. Do you think she'd go? Are you

kidding? If Hart ask her to. Bonjour.

Bonjour. Bonjour. Boy, I mean,

it was just so easy. I just typed up this memo and signed Hart's

name to it. Well, she doesn't get back until the 15th, and Missy doesn't return

until the 24th. Poor old Missy. Don't you feel sorry for her? I think

I'll have Hart send her some flowers and Tahiti. How's everything upstairs?

Very subdued. I think he's plotting something.

Yeah, well, I can see it's gonna be erased. See if he can get.

Before we get the inventory invoices sometime around

here. As a matter of fact, I think while I'm at it, I'll just have

Hart let everybody keep flowers on their desks, saying some things

around that office. Some of those rules of his are so depressing.

At the end of the clip, we see the ladies start improving the lives of

the workers. And allowing them to have a somewhat more cheerful environment.

And then they really make changes that matter and really cater to their

fellow workers. While Hart sits and watches tv in their bondage,

the changes the ladies make are starting to

be noticed. And someone is taking notes on them and everything that

is happening. Heart is starting to grow accustomed to the

bondage, but is still searching for any way to get out of this.

Because he cannot stand the fact that women are controlling everything that he

does. And he ends up finding some hope in a nail file the lady's

left in the bathroom of his current bathroom suite.

He files and files away at the thick leather cuff

on his wrist. While Judy is staying at the house for that

night. We see a man is outside stalking her as she grabs a book

to read. He tries a door to get inside, and it startles

her. And turns out it's her ex husband. And that is our pent,

ultimate clip. Dick. Thanks. It's cold out

there. Dick, what are you doing here? You're supposed to be in Mexico.

I was. I came back. Dick, you can't stay here. You're here alone,

aren't you? Well, yes, I'm house sitting for a friend. Yeah, I've been casing

the house the last few days to make sure. Come on. Spare a cup of

coffee for your freezing old husband, couldn't you? Ex husband. All right,

you sit down and. But then you're gonna have to go. It was no good

from the start. Nothing worked. She left after the first week. Maybe you could call

me tomorrow at work and we could have lunch, talk some more.

I've wanted to see you. I followed you from the office. I thought maybe you

were living with some. No.

What was that? It's nothing. Probably the cat.

I'd better check. I'll go with you. No, it's all right. I'll be right back.

Judy. Oh. What? You look beautiful as ever. Thanks.

Holy shit. Ship.

Let's go.

Let out. Help. Let me go.

Freak out. Judy.

Dick.

Judy. You shut up.

What's going on? Nothing. Who's in that room? Nobody.

Let's go downstairs. Judy, there's somebody in that room. Let me see. Good God.

Oh. Who was

that? A friend. Obviously. So that's what you're into now.

Bondage. What's that? Bondage. S and M. Sex games. That's right.

All of it. I'm into everything. Now get out of here. I can't believe

it. Who is that guy anyway? It's my boss. Your boss? You're having

an affair with your boss? Isn't that typical? Just like you had an affair with

your secretary. But, Judy, this isn't you. You can't be serious.

Don't you tell me what I can or can't do. Those days are over.

And if I want to have have an affair or play sex or

do M and Ms, you can't stop me. M and Ms? As a

matter of fact, I smoke pot. I can see what that kind of living has

done to you. Well, I've changed. I'll say. And not for the better. And to

think that I actually came here tonight to ask you to come back to me.

Huh? Fat chance. Back to what?

You're leaving was the best thing that ever happened to me. If that's all you

feel, there's nothing more to say. Oh, yes, there is.

Hit the road, buster. This is where you. You get off. What are

we gonna do about Roz? She gets back on Friday, I think.

Well, if she causes any more trouble, we'll send her back that language school

and let her learn German. I bet she would. You talking

about Roz? Forget her. I just talked to New York. The invoices will be

here first thing Friday. Morning. Perfect. Three more days.

Oh, goodness. So hard. My ex husband's a dumb piece of work. I did

not like him. Yeah. I think it's something

that we need to note, that she is actually willing to

let bygones be bygones and maybe forgive him and take them back,

because she's like, you know, when he's throwing her, his problems

at her, she's sympathetic. And she seems kind of keen to

at least start talking again. And that interest goes away

at his overreaction and outrage of her having any kind

of life outside of the marriage that he ended, to have

a life away from her. I wondered about that, though. Did he really.

Did she really think, like, wanna listen to be sympathetic,

or was she just trying to get him out of the house? Maybe she was

trying to get him out of the house. Maybe she really was feeling sympathetic,

though. It's hard to tell. Like, I always just. I always just assumed that

her being the sweet lady that she was, she wanted to go

back to the life that she just was used to, but would have Judy and.

Or Judy would have Doralee and Violet as friends to

help encourage her along the way. But I think for a brief moment there,

she was considering just going back to the life that she had, you know?

Yeah. Just because it was what she was used to. And, like, everything else has

been so stressful for her. You know, it's one way of interpreting it that I

just always just assumed. But I could be wrong. Maybe she is just trying to

get him out of the house. That seems a lot more likely, because when

she does finally start, like, basically yelling at him

and screaming and saying, yeah, she's into the bondage, and he has no right to

tell her anything. That also is just a way to get him out of the

house at that point, to belittle him. And if she makes

him believe that it's a bondage thing, then she doesn't have to worry about him,

considering that it might be a kidnapping thing. Yeah, right.

Exactly. Either way, it's fucking hilarious.

And I didn't realize that watching this at such a. Such a young age

that I was exposed to all of this talk of bondage and sex in the

way that I was. But also, it might have been what got me interested in

that sort of thing, possibly. I don't

know. Why is my voice going up high when I mention that? The voice.

I was always going up way too high. All right, let's go ahead and finish

this off. Hart's wife returns early from her trip and finds

him all bondaged up and makes a call from

her hotel that she was sent to in our final clip.

Operator. Good morning.

Would you find a number for me, please? Hello?

Dora Lee, this is Missy Hart. Missy. See, Frank told me

never to call anybody at the office. But I guess it's okay to call you

at home. I just wanted to thank you. Thank me?

Yes, I just realized that it must. Have been you who sent me those

beautiful flowers during my trip. And you signed

Frank's name. Well, it was his idea.

Oh, no, no, it wasn't. I asked him. See, that's why I came

back early, because, missy. Did you just say you've come back?

Yeah, three days ago. Frank sent me to a hotel

for an week. He's trying out some kind of a new exercise

program at the house. Oh, my goodness. You should

see what he's done to our bedroom.

Hello? Hello? Um. What?

I don't believe it. It's done. And if she's back, then Hart must have been

free for the last three days. Listen, call Judy and tell her right away.

But if Hart has been doing what I think he's been doing, we've been had.

Don't be silly. I just brought him his breakfast and he's tied up like always.

Or he's just pretending. Look, you keep hold of my gun. I'm coming over.

You just sit tight till I get there.

Judy. Judy. You found

your gun. Wait a minute. What happened to

the time clock? You retired it. What does that mean? Well, while you

were away, we managed to make a few changes. Changes?

What changes? Holy shit.

What the hell is going on? Who authorized all this?

You did, Mister Hart. It's your signature. Oh,

that's very funny. What are all these people doing here? It's not even 09:00.

This is another program you authorize, sir. It's called flexible hours. People set their

own time. Well, some work eight to four, some work ten to six.

Some work nine to five. Well, I'll put a stop to that. Let's go,

girls. Let's go. Sir, it's working very

nicely. A lot less absenteeism. People really like it.

How do they? Well, I hate it. And what I say goes. Just keep going

to my office till I get ready to call the police. Good morning, Violin.

Here it is. Oh, thanks, Eric.

Well, here are the invoices we've been waiting for. But you've made them worthless.

For the last three days, he's managed to put all that missing equipment back into

the warehouse. Cost him a pretty penny to set it

straight. Well, you've won.

You've trumped Ra. So what are you gonna do now? Oh, I'm sorry, Violet.

Why don't you sit down? Sit down over there. I'm just getting ready to play

my last card. I'm gonna send you three bitches to jail.

Well, but who's here? Geez. I'll be right out.

And you better tell hard.

What? When? Holy shit.

No, no, no problem. Okay. Right.

Thanks. What is it? Kensworthy's here. Who's that?

Russell Tinsworthy, the goddamn chairman of the board. He's here to meet with me.

All right, just fire. Look, you've got

to stand by me. Holy shit. There he is.

Here's the man himself, Mister Tinsworthy. Franklin Hart.

Frank Hart. My boy, I would like to shake your hand, and here is

a small token of my esteem. Thank you, sir.

I might say it an honor meeting you. Well, that's all right. You know,

I don't get up here very often, but I keep tabs on the situation through

Perkins. Right. And when I find a division that shows a 20% rise

in productivity over a period of six weeks time, I want to meet the

man who's responsible. Well, thank you, sir. We all

appreciate that. You managed to create a very, very splendid environment here.

Very livable, very personal. Well, I find it

very. I don't know, the people seem to like you.

Keep the crew happy and you can't go wrong, eh, Frank? Well, that's the idea,

sir. Bestie Zensworth is

interested in some of those other new programs of yours. Uh huh.

Like the. Like the job sharing program. Job sharing.

Bold concept. How's it working out? Well, I think very

well, sir. Well, Violet. I'm sorry,

Mister Tinsworthy, I'd like for you to meet Violet Newstead. She's my senior supervisor.

I'm very happy to meet you, Mister Tinsworth. How do you do? How do you

do? I've heard a lot of wonderful things about you, miss. Thank you.

Pretty much my right arm around here, as a matter of fact. Violet, why don't

you just explain to Mister Tinsworthy the job sharing situation?

Well, it's been most effective, Mister Tinsworthy. For instance, Maria Delgado

over there is a perfect example. She shares her job with another worker who takes

over in the afternoon. She does? I mean, she does. Both women

are very happy, and we couldn't have be more pleased with their performance.

So you pulled it off, Frank, huh? Well, I like to think we did,

anyway. Good. Like the daycare center. Daycare center?

Yes. You know, that reminds me during the war, I had charge of setting up

daycare centers in all the defense plants. Glad to see you brought it back.

That's the idea. Well, violent. The daycare center,

Mister Tinsworthy, would you like to see it? It's just down the hall. Well,

thank you. Thank you. I can see why Frank reposed of such trust in you.

Thank you, Violet.

Our daycare center has been open now for two weeks. It's been wonderfully successful.

Really? Yes, our working parents love it.

Oh, Mister Hart, it's so good to see you again. Who are you?

Don't you recognize me? No. Margaret Foster. The old

lush? Yes, that was me. But thanks to the company's alcoholics rehabilitation

program you started, those days are over.

And I'll never forget those wonderful letters of encouragement

you sent. God bless you, Mister Hart.

Good to see you. Doesn't she look great? Hold this.

When we transformed it, the cost was minimal. It's cut down on absenteeism,

and we had a wonderful time doing it. Well, Frank, I gotta give you

credit. You really pulled it off here. That equal

pay thing, though, that's. That's got to go. Oh, yes. Yeah, yeah, it's all right

as an incentive. But we don't need to keep on priming the pump. No,

sir, I don't think so. I've been, um. I've been talking to Hinkle over

here. Oh.

And, uh, you're my kind of guy, Frank.

Creative, incisive. Get the job done. Right, sir. Right now,

I want you to come and work with me. Excuse me? I need a

man like you, Frank. A brazilian operation is just about

to take off. Brazil, sir? You're gonna love

it down there. You get a handsome bonus. And you'll be doing a big favor

both to me and to the company. Well, yes, sir, but how can I move

to Brazil? Well, I'm talking about a leave of absence. Is that right,

Hinkle? Anything you say, Artie. All right, we go upstairs now, we work this whole

thing out. I want you and my team right away, Frank. Mister Dinsworth,

you know, I can't tell you how much I appreciate teamwork. Teamwork, that's what

it's all about. Go where you're most needed, when you're most needed.

Mister Tinsworthy. The jungle. Hell, man, I'm offering you the chance

of a lifetime. Two or three years down there and you'll never want to come

back. Two or three years? You love it down

there. Healthy climate. Mister Tinsworthy.

Art, you let me tell you one thing. I ain't the kind of boy who

takes no for an answer. Yes, sir.

Priscilla.

Did you see the look on his face? I swear I almost felt sorry

for him. We could. We actually pulled it off and we didn't panic.

Intense, worthy. Loved what we did. Yeah. Everything except that part about the

money. What are we gonna do about that? Hey, we've come this far,

haven't we? This is just the beginning. And here's to

the beginning. I'll drink to that. The beginning. Yay.

Is your heart. Holy marred.

All right, so that is the end of the movie. And they

roll credits. Cinema psyops 1010

years ten years. I love nine to five. It never gets

old. I could watch it. Like, I could watch it again tonight. Like, my wife

was sad that she didn't get to watch it. Cause I'm doing notes, and when

I have to pause it to do notes and things like that, it always irritates

her and she would rather just watch it. And I just flatly offered, like,

honey, if you want to watch it when you're getting ready to fall asleep at

night tonight and, you know, just, like, have it on in the background as

background noise to watch until you start getting sleepy, I will watch it again

with you. Because I. Seriously, I could watch it again right now after we've got

you done talking about it. Like, I watch it multiple

times a year. I sometimes watch it to be able to fall asleep at night.

Like, this movie is just like comfort food for my soul. I don't

know why. It just is. Probably because I. Well, I have a story time

is to tell probably. Why? Because it's another childhood exposure I've already

mentioned, but I'm going to kind of talk about it in my story time,

so. Yeah. What. What do you have to say about it? I mean, I've been

talking about it because I've been fanboying out. Yeah. No, I fucking love

nine to five. I remember that, watching that as a kid myself. Just like

you. I always got enamored by when Lily Tomlin did

the Snow white thing. That was just fucking always hilarious to

me, with all the birds and everything.

Lily Tomlin is a national treasure. As. As is,

you know, almost everybody in this movie is a national treasure.

So I always. Yeah, I enjoyed this movie.

Acting's great, you know, from everyone,

from the heroes to the villains. It's all fucking good.

Nothing. I have no, like, problems.

There's nothing, like, to be said about this movie, I don't think,

find any faults in it. It's one of those great movies that have stood the

test of time and. Yeah. And it still tells a very

relevant story to this day. Yeah. If anything, I need to add

to that. I would also say that anytime that Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin work

together, it's an absolute delight. And you will enjoy it if you enjoy nine to

five, just because they capture that same beauty of the two of

them working together and working off of each other so well. And,

I mean, Jane Fonda plays the perfect, like, either Downey innocent

or straight man to Lily Tomlin's, like,

eccentric, weird nature that she always ends up doing with

her characters. And the foil between the two of them is just

palpable every time. Yeah. Like, Grace and Frankie was always a delight

to watch for that very reason. It just really, truly was. Like,

I love that series because of those two. And then, you know, of course,

God saved Dolly Parton just because she's just the best.

Yeah. Other than working with artists, just for the sake of working with artists that

I don't agree with, um, I'll let everything else slide because it's st.

Dolly to me, too. Like, there's. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She does so much with what

she has, even though she doesn't have to. And it's a hell of a lot

more than what I'm capable of doing. And I'm glad that she does it,

you know? Yep. Agreed. All right, let's move on,

and we'll do my fucking story time, and we'll get the out of here.

What do you think? All right, let's do it. All right, up next on the

pirate radio edit, we're going to have,

obviously, Dolly Parton singing nine to five, because it's a fucking theme song for

the movie. When we come back, we'll have my storytelling about this film.

Keep it down over there. We're trying to record. You've been really good lately.

Be nice to Igor. Don't you mean Igor?

No. Look at his face. Holy shit. What happened to his eyes?

Igor was a naughty little clone. He tried to rip out his eyes last week.

Jesus Christ. What, you made him watch more of the robots?

No, but he really hates night of the Lepus.

Well, who didn't? My wife hated that shit. But why would

it make eyegor tear on his own eyes? I used a concoction of

mind altering chemicals and a pseudo virtual reality simulation of Night

of the Lepus for about two complete viewing of the film.

Sweet chocolate rice. Yeah, it was quite effective,

but I will install cybernetic eyes with the help of my

genetically engineered rabbit. Oh, my God,

look at him. He's so adorable. Yeah, but seriously,

it's a meat eater, so don't.

All right. Actually, I'm gonna hit you folks up with a double dose.

I hate to break in on Dolly Parton's nine to five, and it's fucking brilliant,

but I gotta tell my story time so we can all get the fuck out

of here. So here it is. Here's mine next. Story time.

Story time.

Story time. So the double dose is because I

actually do have two stories that are equally kind of short to do as

one normal story time that we usually take up. So the first one,

obviously, how I saw nine to five as a kid, I remember watching this on

HBO as well, being super, super young.

Like, when sometimes you can't even tell the difference between what's on tv is

a real story or it's just a fictional story that you're watching.

Young. Yeah. You know, that's when this was on HBO for me. And I remember

watching it at least that young. Like, I'm talking, like, preschool young, watching it back

that far. And I think that it did actually

have a bit of an effect on me from watching it because they steal a

corpse. And I have very gallowsian humor from watching this film

a lot as a kid. And, you know, like, really young. Because it's. You know,

it was okay for me to watch Young. Nobody cared. And the

bondage thing with Daphne Coleman had me interested in, like, you know,

ladies tying me up. Yeah. No,

especially Dolly Parton. Yeah. Yeah. Or Jane Fonda or whatever you're into,

you know. Yeah. Wherever you're going. Yeah.

Well, I don't mention Lily Tomlin because I don't think she would be into me,

so it's fine. Yeah, it's fine. Well, listen,

I don't think any three of them would be into me, so that's fair.

But they're at least into something that is vaguely like me, is what I'm getting.

Like, a better specimen of a man is what I'm getting at. Whereas I don't

think. Yeah. Anyway, so, yeah,

I did. I saw this, like, super, super young. I've been watching it, like,

a ton. I've been watching it my entire life. And the. It's one of this.

It's like what you mentioned where when I grew up watching it,

I got more of the things that were the joke in it

more, and I understood more of what was going on. But the important part of

the story that I need to talk about is I actually remember. Well, I wouldn't

want anyone to hate me as much as what Daphne Coleman

has hated in this movie need to not be like this prick,

right? Is, like, the lesson that I took from this as a child where I'm

like, this is not a man to be. And so I kind of remember

asking my mom at one point in time, I'm like, what does it mean when

they say he's the sexist? You know, I understand lying, but, like, he's sexist,

egotistical. I didn't understand when I was super young, so I wanted to know what

those words were. And then I knew lying, and I kind of knew hypocrite and

hypocritical, but I wanted. I had to make sure for that one. And I was

like. And I asked my mom what a big it was, right? And she,

being a good mother, sat me down and actually had a really long discussion

about what those words meant and what bigotry was and

was always really big about civil rights and equal rights and everything like that.

I mean, she grew up in the sixties. All the stuff she ever remembered from

being a kid in the sixties was, like, glamorizing the movement of the hippies

and the things that they tried to do for equal rights and all of that

kind of thing that happened in the sixties. And because she glamorized

that for me, it became, like, idealized a little bit when I

was younger. And so, yeah, it all points back to watching

nine to five as a kid. I'm nothing

wrong with that man. I'm somewhat of a better man who might be bondage

a little too much and loves gallows humor because of nine to five.

Yeah. All right, now let's. Now let's fast forward to the

next story time real quick. Too late.

Too late. The manager who's out to get you and the

manager who steals credit for your ideas and things like that. That was something that

I experienced a couple of jobs ago. And I like to tell the story

of the time that I fucked that manager over and used

the fact that they were stealing, stealing shit from me and my taking credit for

my ideas against them. So that's. That's this story

time. And it'll be super quick because this is basically how it ended up happening.

I got tired of it, and I lied about how

something could be designed and how it could be done because the supervisor

didn't understand coding and pretended like he did and was learning some

things but didn't understand some of these patterns. And I basically

said that something could be done with.

I think I said the pattern recursion. And it was basically like, it was

impossible, it couldn't happen. And it sounds like the stupidest thing ever if you actually

did it and unless you knew coding, it doesn't make sense. But I think I

use the word recursion because it was a nice big word that I think he

would fall for. For it. And if he's listening to this podcast ever, then I

guess he has me on this. But it was my fake idea

to prove that you were stealing my ideas, which it worked anyway.

Now you have to deal. Yeah. He presents this as an idea of, you know,

to like a big meeting and everything. And, you know, all the people are just

kind of like, yeah, going along with it or whatever that aren't really coders.

Cause they're fucking managers and they don't know any better anyway. And then he

writes up a document on the thing and like, you know, has all the requirements

and everything and uses, like, everything that I said that was bullshit and then

submits it, and then immediately all of my team

starts laughing at him. Yeah, for obvious reasons.

Like, right? Like, it's. It's obvious to anybody who's actually a coder, which is

who he was supposed to be in charge with the.net developers. And he

just totally wrote up this entire bunch of bullshit that is

clearly not even accurate and is relatively

ridiculous in its scope. And it got all the way up.

It became this whole entire thing. And then he had

no one to blame because if he tried to say it was my idea,

then I could obviously say, well, you've been stealing a lot of my ideas,

so therefore I did this. Yeah. And it's also like,

well, why'd you just take credit for it if it was cort's idea?

Right, exactly. You're busted.

Yeah, he can't say shit. Right? Right. So he had to just fucking eat crow.

And from that day forth, he tried to make my life absolutely miserable.

But, uh, he had just gone on vacation shortly after that. And then

I put in my two weeks notice and started a job there. I was working

from home, uh, that I ended up eventually losing. But, I mean, that's what happens

in tech whenever there's downsize. Yeah. But yes, I left. I put in my two

weeks notice after doing that. Um, so I basically

left the equivalent of an emotional upper decker in his toilet and

walked away.

So there you go. Take this job and shove it. Workers rights and

don't take credit for other people's shit. And make sure that everybody gets their just

desserts in the end. And that's what nine to five will teach you.

Take this job. Shove it. All right,

well, it's funny that you mentioned that because, you know, I did play it earlier,

and I just mentioned it, too, so there we go.

All right, let's fucking end this bullshit. I'm getting loopy. We're gonna play the show

housekeeping now. And on the pirate radio edit immediately following that, we're gonna have the

dropkick Murphy's, which could arguably be the most hard car

version of. Which side are you on? On the pirate radio edit, right after this.

Cygor's looking quite large. Yeah, I've been feeding

him a lot of proteins and various other things.

Hot pockets. Well, no, I didn't want him to get large like we're large.

I wanted them to develop normally. Good idea.

I had to kind of trick him into eating, though. Yeah. You notice there's no

other clones around, right?

Soylent grapes. Yeah, but it's not technically

made out of people because they're clones. Clones aren't people. That doesn't sound right.

But I don't know enough about clone laws to dispute it, so I'm gonna

go ahead and say you're right. Well, I know that corporations have been considered

people by former vice presidents, so. And clones are not so far.

Yeah, that's a weirdly placed political message in the middle of this conversation,

but let's go on. How are the robots doing? Oh, actually, why don't we step

into the other room and we'll take a look? Sweet.

I just see a bunch of Prince Belliott licking nazis. Well,

they're not nazis. They're just blonde. I told you I was inspired by war of

the robots, and I built robots. God actually

ruined the robot. No, they're still robots. No, but no one's gonna

be afraid of these robots. That's the point. No one will see them coming.

Oh, my God. You robot. No, no, they're still robots. I don't

want to be king of the world if this is like, the army

we have. You weren't gonna be king. At best, you would be queen. On,

like, a night when I'm really bored and lonely. Number one,

that's nice. Number two, these robots are terrible. They're robots.

They are not robots. You know what? I'm sick of this bun bun.

Get em. God, it's so fluffy.

No, no. Find him there. Get him, bug bugs.

I'm severely disappointed in you.

Scratch behind the ear, because once you hit that spot, it's overdeveloped.

Oh, I better come in. Now, otherwise, I'm gonna start smashing furniture.

Jesus. Oh, man, that gets me going.

I always love which side are you on, but their version of it really makes

me want to wreck shit, man. Right, let's have a meeting with management after

listening to that shit. Am I right? No. Shit. Now let's have

a meeting, mother. Absolutely. Well,

while you're out there fighting for your rights to live and survive

in a capitalist society that is trying to crush you and steal your labor,

kick the fuck out of them. And this week, and make it while

you enjoy beck with soul sucking jerk on the pirate radio edit.

Well, I was just covered in large bunny. I mean,

it's not the size of the bunny, it's how it covers you. You know,

I'm really disappointed in Bun Bun's abilities to actually be a good guard

bunny. Well, okay, number one, you made the same mistake they made

to leap us. You didn't make him scary enough, and you pet him once

behind the ear, and he's your best friend. Well, how did I know he would

have that weakness until now? I'm glad I tested him on you instead of somebody

that was actually dangerous. Okay, number one, that's just bad testing

on your part is. I mean, you should know your bunny's full abilities before

you even just let him out of the cage. Well, this is uncharted territory.

It's a giant mutant, carnivorous bunny. I don't know how carnivorous

he is. Uh, you should probably check your arm. Yeah, it's a flesh

moon. What flesh is left anyway?

No wonder. You know what? That's probably why you're so sedate, man. You look like

you're losing a lot of blood. I'm replacing it with Mountain Dew and rumenae.

Hey, what's up, dude? Hey, what's going on? All right, let's get this going for

nine to five. Recording in progress. Recording in progress.

I'm ready to roll if you are ready to go. All right, let's get her

done.

Somebody smoked too much during your episode? I think so. All right,

let's pull this together. Three, two, one.

Sadeena.

Well, while you're out there fighting for your rights to live and survive

in a capitalist society that is trying to crush you and steal your labor,

kick the fuck out of them. And this week and make it your bitch while

you enjoy back with soul sucking jerk on the pirate radio edit.

All right, you should know soul sucking jerk, it's from your generation.

Yeah, it's just like me, so.

Alright, let's go ahead and end this shit.

Recording stopped.

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