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A thirst quenching podcast for the girls, gays, theys, & astrology baes where we talk about anything & EVERYTHING through an astrological lens.
Hi, guys. Welcome to another episode of Tea From The Galaxy, a thirst quenching podcast for the girls, gays, theys, and astrology baes where we talk about anything and everything through an astrological lens. Happy pride month, guys. It is pride. It is pride.
Serena:Can you believe that I've been doing this podcast for a year now? Because I started this podcast last June during pride month. And just like how I did last pride month, I brought on a queer guest every single Tuesday. I will be doing the same this month for pride month twenty twenty six. And who to better kick off this Queer astrology podcast?
Serena:No other than Deb from Queer astrology. I'm so excited that they decided to come on my podcast and guest. Deb from Queer astrology is like the pioneer of queer astrology. Okay? Deb is a celebrity astrologer practicing astrology without the gender binary.
Serena:So a lot of what they do is studying astrology without it being so heteronormative. Really focusing on the energy of what the study of astrology really is and how it affects our compatibility and how it helps us learn about ourselves and connecting with ourselves too. So we talk a lot about that. And we also talk a lot about what it just means and feels and is to be someone who identifies as queer in society right now. So it was definitely a fun episode.
Serena:I hope you guys enjoy it, and let's just jump right into it.
Deb:Thank you for having me on here. My name is Deb, by the way. Yes. Similar is I I started Queerstrology kind of as for a similar reason because we have Channy out there, right? We have like certain queer astrologers that we would look to, but I didn't find anybody who was purposely taking the gender out of astrology.
Deb:They were still giving like, you know, masculine to feminine, which you can say in some aspect of it, but how I feel about astrology overall is that it's about energy, it has nothing to do with gender. So, anybody of any kind of gender or even if you feel as though you have no gender, you can still have energy, right? Yeah. So once I found that there wasn't really anybody out there that was purposely doing it, I'm like, alright, I'll do it then. So that's how started for astrology.
Deb:And the interesting thing about it was actually about the compatibility thing because I was a serial monogamous until I finally got a divorce from my late thirties, early forties, and then I decided to have the extravaganza of, you know, I'm like, I'm not I'm being I'm poly. I'm, you know, gonna do all this craziness.
Serena:You're like, I'm free, baby. Yeah.
Deb:And experiencing all that. And I think that was also part of it too, this, like, pleasure revolution that I was like I'm like, it's okay to, like, seek pleasure, especially for anybody who has been told because of their gender identity, they're not supposed to or it's bad to. Right? Mhmm. I was using Mars and Venus to try to help because it was so focused on Mars is male and Venus is female.
Deb:So I was trying to make it where neither, they're neither. Right? They're just energies. At first I was saying your Venus is your bottom energy and your Mars is your top energy. But, really, it's just more about how Venus is your surrendering kind of about the things that you love and that you wanna be able to be vulnerable around.
Deb:It doesn't matter what your gender is. Right? Mhmm. Anybody can be vulnerable just like Mars is your what you wanna be in control of. Right?
Deb:Yes. And everybody has tendencies and places that they wanna be in control of. Mhmm. And when it comes to compatibility, like you were saying, I actually came up with this formula where everybody always concentrates on the sun signs and compatibility. Yes.
Deb:And even for queer folks, can at least do that, right? We can be like, oh, it's my, you know, do our sun signs, are they compatible? Even if they happen to have a gender related to them in the horoscope, right? Mhmm. We can still kind of, you know?
Deb:But the way that I do it is I actually ask people multiple choice questions and there's five of them and it represents your sun, your moon, your mercury, your Venus, and your Mars. So all of those things are important things and it asks you questions, which tells me which sign would be the best for you. Because you want according to your ego, according to how you emotionally act, how you communicate. Mhmm. And a lot of people will just, like, I'm never getting a Scorpio again.
Deb:You know? Yeah.
Serena:Or something like that. That a lot. I hear that a lot. Or people will just come up to me and be like, you're an astrologer? What's what's the best sign for me?
Serena:And I'm like, and it's this
Deb:is a loaded question. Yeah. And I can't I can't just tell you that because, know, but this at least gives me an idea of what they're looking for. And then, of course, in astrology, there's only certain things you can have. So, like, as an example, say that they do they're into to Cancer Suns like yourself.
Deb:Right? Mhmm. But they also would be best with, like, you know, like a Sagittarius Mercury. Well, that's not gonna work because you can't have a Cancer Sun with Sagittarius Mercury. Yes.
Deb:So that's why I'm there to help figure out which one would be the next closest thing to what they're trying to you know what I mean? Yeah. And I can send them back, like, I usually on these they're only $20 for these little synastry things that I do. Mhmm. And or find your matches, they're called.
Deb:And I send them back three of their best matches and the days that they were born for extra fun. Oh, I love that. But really, honestly, like, let's just talk about compatibility in general. It's whether your crazies match or not. Right?
Deb:Mhmm. That's it. Because Yeah. A lot of people, like, when you're getting into relationships and even especially being poly, and I'm still poly even though I'm not really active poly. I have a nesting partner and I haven't I haven't been seeking other partners recently.
Deb:But that doesn't mean I'm not poly. Just like Yeah. Anybody in sexuality doesn't mean you're a certain kind of sexuality because you're just with a woman at that point or you're just with a man or you're just with a certain Yeah. It's true. Yeah.
Deb:So, yeah, I try to bring that into the into astrology and, you know, all all of those things that have to do with matching because it's just about finding that person that your crazies match with and that you don't have to lie to, honestly. Yeah. You just the biggest part in in what I see, honestly. So
Serena:Yeah. And someone who, like, complements you. Like, that's a big point of looking at astrological compatibility too, and that's truly what it is, like finding someone who complements you when we kind of do those types of readings. I love talking about compatibility. It's one of my favorite things.
Serena:It's one of my favorite readings for other people. But also self compatibility? Self compatibility? What do you mean?
Deb:Especially somebody like you who you're a Cancer sun and you have a Capricorn moon. Now you're not quite almost on the full moon, but not quite. Right? Yeah. Not opposition from who you are at your ego, like, who you're who you're you're striving to be, and then your emotions, how they're they're the opposite of that.
Deb:And ironically, right, cancer is ruling the ego and Yes. The And for those of you who follow me, you know what I say about Capricorn moons. They they go into the bathroom when they have a minute, when they have a time, then they cry for a second, and they yell at themselves in the mirror to get their stuff together and let's go. You know?
Serena:Yeah. Yeah. And no one's gonna see these tears because
Deb:But you're a cancer son.
Serena:So if
Deb:something makes you really if you get overly excited about something, you might cry or if you're, like, happy about like, there's these things, and that's what I mean about understanding yourself. Because, like, when I do full sensory readings for folks, make them do the individual readings as well. Because I think it's important to understand who you are as a person before you try anybody to
Serena:else. And that's A 100%.
Deb:Astrology in general. I'm a researcher, so I like to the actual information as much as I can. You know? Because they call they call astrology a pseudoscience, but there's not actual science in it, and
Serena:that is not true. Mhmm.
Deb:There's so much in it. And there's so
Serena:much, like, pattern recognition too that I tell people. Absolutely. And they keep it place.
Deb:Yeah. I mean, we're we're made of the same stuff stars are made of. Mhmm. Right? All of us are made of the same thing.
Deb:The sun affects the the earth. We have different seasons. The moon affects the tides. How are you gonna say that that the movement of those things don't affect us as well? They obviously do.
Deb:Exactly. Astrology is about energy, like I was talking about before. Yeah. So is all religion. That's all it's meant to be.
Deb:It's all about representation for you to look towards something, to be a better person because of x y z. Mhmm. Right? Whether you think that that's real or not, that's up to you. Right?
Deb:Whatever your whatever the energy is that you want to, you might call it god, but I call it the universe. This person, call it Allah, but I call you know what I mean? So we're all it's all where we wanna be guided from. So to, like, not other people's isn't necessarily the best idea in my opinion. Yeah.
Deb:Everybody can kinda believe whatever they would like to believe, but as long as you're not trying to hurt others or affect others negatively in the sense of, you know, my beliefs are better than yours, which is let's start pretty much every war we've ever had.
Serena:Right? Yep. Yeah. Which why I love astrology is because it shows or showed me throughout the years how connected we all are, like, as humans, but to nature and to animals and just everything around us. And, yeah, division is is one of the worst things, I feel like.
Deb:Yeah. I mean, where do you think the personality traits for the signs came from? They had to come from somewhere. Right? So they might have been associated with the people who they were named after.
Deb:Right? Like, in Greek mythology. But also just things of, like, the times of year that people were born. So, like, as an example, like, Sagittarians are born in the fall when there's lots of harvest and things like that. Sagittarians tend to be larger people.
Deb:They tend to be more exploring because the weather allows them to do that. Do you see what I'm trying to say? Yeah. Versus a Pisces who's born at the end of winter. They tend to be smaller, more about using their brain instead of traveling around every do you see what I mean?
Deb:And those things have just evolved with that, but it's all energy. It's still just energy that exists. So the better you get your birth chart, the better you understand yourself, and you can use your energy to kind of obtain things you would like. Yeah. Say people who are asking about astrology are already putting their intentions in the right place.
Deb:Right? Yeah. No. I'm trying to figure it out.
Serena:Do you find a certain sign or aspect that books a lot of birth chart readings with you because I have one in my back pocket that I can think of.
Deb:That's interesting. Very aware of themselves. Around their birthdays. Interesting. What's interesting and and, honestly, like, fall is is the busier like, Libras are a lot.
Deb:Scorpios love knowing about themselves. Like, you all think Leos are the the ones that will know it's Scorpios, just so y'all know. Yeah. Honestly, the beginning, I remember there was a lot of Cancers Okay. That I've read.
Deb:So probably the most that I've read is Cancer and Libra. I could look and see, but but and a lot of Virgos too. A lot of Virgos.
Serena:That's what I was gonna say. A lot of Virgos and Virgo risings, probably top. And then Scorpios, Scorpio risings, or just very people with Scorpio energy, like heavy energy in their chart. Yeah. Cancer too, some Gemini in there, but I would say Virgo Scorpio top two in that I've recognized.
Serena:And I'm like, it has to be because they're just so self aware, and they're seeing things that other people don't see quote, unquote, don't see or care to see, they're always reading in between the lines.
Deb:Virgo is ruled by Mercury just like Gemini is. Right? Yeah. So there's only two planets that still rules two signs, and they used to like, they used to give it, you know, masculine and feminine, but that's not what it is. Right?
Deb:It's actually internal versus external. So let me do Venus first and I'll go back to Mercury. So Venus rules both Taurus and Libra. Well, Taurus is more of the internal love, meaning they love themselves. They love their space, they're at home, that's where their love is, right?
Deb:They value themselves. Whereas Libra is like, I love you. They're very external with it, right? I love you. I love this.
Deb:I want this, that sort of thing. Then we get to Mercury, it's kind of the same thing. So Mercury is communication. And with Gemini, clearly, it's external. Right?
Deb:Yeah. They do a lot of external processing. Virgos, on the other hand, do a lot of internal processing. Mhmm. So then they're gonna come to, like, an astrologer or somebody else to help them work through what they are trying to process themselves.
Deb:Right? So that does kind of Interesting. That they would be interested. Make sense. They're like, oh, okay.
Deb:What's what's going on then?
Serena:Like Yeah. Virgos definitely need a lot of help unraveling the mind, which can go like this. They're Gemini too.
Deb:But so caught in their detail sometimes, you gotta, like, pull them out of that. You know? Yeah. Look at the bigger picture for a moment and see what's going on.
Serena:Yeah. Usually, I ask some questions to every guest I have on the podcast just so whoever's listening can have a little bit better understanding of who you are. You can choose to answer all the questions, some of them, whichever ones you want to answer. But the questions are, what are your pronouns, your sexual identity, your age, and your big three? Okay.
Serena:My pronouns are they, she. Oh, my big three are Capricorn, Sag, and Sag. Love it. Yes. Capricorn.
Serena:I love Capricorns as a Capricorn moon.
Deb:I have a Capricorn sun and Capricorn Mars, actually. I'm a Sagittarius rising moon, Mercury, and Neptune, and all six of those placements are in my first house.
Serena:So when did you start getting into astrology, and how did it pivot into queer astrology, or was that always the the goal?
Deb:It was well, I used to do, like oh, yeah. That was some of the other stuff. Yeah. I'm I'm 47, by the way. I didn't get that question.
Deb:And what I used to do, I was actually person, like a marketing director for architecture and engineering firms. And I mean, like, the fancy the schmancy guys. Right? The start mechanics, if you will. So I would get them these huge projects.
Deb:So I was really good at taking complicated information and making it easier for other people to understand because we had to get the projects by telling these people that don't know anything about architecture engineering how we're going make them a building. Right? So I used all that information. I have a degree in in graphic design, and, so that's helpful in making all these different things that I get to do in my videos and things like that. A 100%.
Deb:And then during, COVID, when COVID was crazy, I was like, you know, I'm gonna get more into the astrology stuff. And, like, that's when I started looking for the queer astrologer thing and and more of that stuff and then wanted to start queer astrology. So that's how it began. And then I was just I'm like, I'm gonna push on it now because as I'm learning more and more, I wanna tell other people about what I'm learning. Yeah.
Deb:So I started doing that, and then it just grew and grew from there. And then I got to read Margaret Cho, which was really cool. And so then I just started reading, like, other celebrities and reality stars and stuff like that.
Serena:Yeah. No. I saw all the people that you have given birth to our readings to, and I thought it was so interesting.
Deb:So yeah. Like, Like, I and other astrologers too. I had tried to get Chani to let me read her twice. She said no both times, but I'm I'm trying. I'm still trying.
Deb:She's a whole sign one.
Serena:So are you are you more Placidus, or are you leaning towards reading Placidus? Okay.
Deb:But I understand the difference, which is usually interesting. Most people don't understand the difference. I Yeah. Explain that in my lives. I try to go live once a week on TikTok and teach Mhmm.
Deb:How to read, a birth chart. So and oh my gosh. I almost forgot. I have a book coming out.
Serena:It's I was gonna ask you about that. Yes. I was
Deb:gonna more about that at the end, but it's the the ebook comes out this Friday, which is the fifteenth May 15 for those of you listening to this at a different time. Mhmm. And the paperback comes out the following Friday on the twenty second, and it's a reference guide thing. It's just it's not like do you know how you get astrology books and there's just so much information in there? You're like, I just wanna know x y z Yeah.
Deb:Book is. Like, you're like, I love the phrase. Here's its symbol. Here's what it means. Here's its Yeah.
Deb:You know, that sort of thing. And in my style. So, again, with the graphic design stuff, I that's why I was able to kinda move into this and make these videos and things. Like, I knew how to do all that. I could design things.
Deb:I could show you visually what we're trying to say instead of just talking about it.
Serena:Yeah. And for someone like me who's a big, like, visual learner too, that definitely helps. I love that you're always teaching helping teach people and being open to, like, teaching beginners. If you wanna get into astrology, this is it's all in one place, and
Deb:here you go. There's four elements in astrology. It's it's fire, earth, air, and water, and each of them has, like, a baseline energy. Right? Mhmm.
Deb:So fire is passion, earth is structure, air is intelligence, and water is emotion. And then to separate each of the three of those signs, because then we have three fire, three right? We have modes, which gives them their action. Right? So there's cardinals, which are the initiators, the fixed signs, which are the adjusters, like the fixers, for lack of a better term.
Deb:Right? Mhmm. They just wanna add some a little panache, anyway. And then we have the finishers, which are the mutable signs. Right?
Deb:So Oh, I like that. Square when something's square, they're in the same mode. Mhmm. So they're either both trying to initiate, but they're using a different baseline. So, like, as an example, Aries would be fire and Capricorn actually, I'll have to go up.
Deb:Yeah. In Capricorn, when you heard them, like, is that right? And since they're if they were aspected to each other, they would be square. Right? Yeah.
Deb:And that's because they're both trying to initiate, but one's trying to use passion and the other one's trying to use structure. Yes. Do you see what I mean to initiate? So they just don't hit. Whereas in a shrine, the rule is that they're in the same element, which means they have the same baseline.
Deb:All passion or they're all structure or whatever. And, yeah, you can just kinda get lazy and let, you know, oh, well, the details or whatever will take care of that and just Yeah.
Serena:I like how you describe that because a lot of people will hear about, like, squares or trines or aspects, but they don't truly know what it means to have a square. Like, you can say square all day, but, like, what does it actually mean? So I like how you worded that. And even giving that visual too, because it's kinda like, Aries and Capricorn, they are trying to complete, like, the same mission, but with different perspectives. It's like having, like, two chefs in the kitchen trying to do the same job, but they're both, like, you know, alphas.
Serena:They're just gonna butt heads. Because Ares is gonna be like, let's just do it
Deb:and see how it works. Yeah. And Capricorn's like, is that really efficient? I don't think so.
Serena:Yep. Oh, I definitely butt heads with Aries energy in my life. People who have prominent Aries energy just because I don't maneuver like that. I don't have any Aries energy in my chart, Cancer, Sun, and Mars, Capricorn, Moon. I'm very much just don't maneuver like
Deb:like, that at and, like, what are you doing over there? Yeah.
Serena:Yeah. I'm, like, wait a minute. Or I'm thinking about, like, how that's making someone else feel, or I'm thinking about, like
Deb:Mhmm.
Serena:A long term the long term effect of it. And Aries is just kinda like, I'm feeling it. I'm feeling it right now. Let's do it. And I'm like, woah.
Serena:But being that I do lack that energy, I I do like being surrounded by people who have heavy fire energy in their chart for sure. They're like, come on.
Deb:Let's do it. So what's your least favorite sign? Energetically wise Mhmm.
Serena:It has to be Aries energy. If it's any sign that I just don't understand that well because I'm just just so not like that, it is Aries. Mhmm.
Deb:So That that passion sometimes is they're not considering the emotion.
Serena:I a 100%. I think the nonconsidering the emotion is something that I just never experienced ever in my life.
Deb:Now how funny is your Cancer throwing it at Aries, and I'm a Capricorn, and I'm gonna throw it at Libra. We're in a cardinal fight out here right now is what we're doing.
Serena:Talk about a square
Deb:water or taking on air and fire. But the reason why I have this this thing I love Libras. They're usually really hot, you know, and I end up dating them, but I don't wanna be in a relationship with them because or, like, you know, having fun with them, we'll say. Mhmm. Because when it comes to making the decision and if they stall for two seconds, I'm gonna lose my mind because of Capricorn efficiency, you know Yeah.
Deb:With the Sagittarius energy on top of that, I boss them around, and they like it, which they pisses me off because I don't want them to like it. You know what mean? I want them to be mad at me or be like, don't don't treat me like that or whatever. And they just don't do it. So I can't.
Deb:I can't with the with the
Serena:That is very true, honestly. Libra's indecisiveness can definitely piss me off. I'm like, make a fucking decision. I don't mind, like, wearing the pants or taking the reins on certain things. If someone is really gonna be that passive or that indecisive, I'll be like, alright.
Serena:Now it's my say. And if you're if you have that much of no say, and then you should be fine with whatever decision I'm making then. Well, what's your favorite sign, though? My favorite sign? I have a love hate relationship with this sign.
Serena:Oh, and hate is a strong word, but I do love and I do appreciate very heavy Capricorn energy. Possibly because it is my mood sign. But I just I'm a big acts of service girl.
Deb:Yeah. Yeah.
Serena:Capricorn's just A resourceful, aren't they?
Deb:Yeah.
Serena:Yeah. They just know how to. And also, think being that I have a Capricorn moon, I can see right through the Capricorn energy of putting on the stone cold front, but, like, actually being a big baby, like, on the inside. So I think there's just, that unsaid kind of understanding always with Capricorns in my life, but also Leo. I love the energy of Leo too.
Serena:I love
Deb:the confidence of Leo. Yeah. Leo is actually my favorite. Yeah. I would say.
Deb:And a lot of people like I said, a lot of people give them the the ego thing. Right? Like Mhmm. I mean, they're ruled by the sun. The sun represents your ego.
Deb:But the ego for them is actually if you hurt their ego. So if you hurt it, they will forgive you, but they'll never forget it happened. Like, they'll hold it and back in the log. You know what I'm saying? But they'll they'll be friendly to your face.
Deb:It's fine. Like, no problem. Unless they need to use it. Oh, yeah. I understand.
Deb:Seeking adoration. So they do want you to notice that they've done something. So it's not just like, hey. You look so good today. It's like, oh my gosh.
Deb:You wore the perfect shoes that match the wand you're carrying today, you know, whatever it happens to be. Yeah. They just want you to notice, like, certain things that they've done on purpose, that they've worked for doing. Oh, yeah. And that's what makes like that.
Deb:My well, my my nesting partner is a Leo.
Serena:He's a
Deb:Leo sun. But we have opposite rising. She's a Gemini rising, and I'm a Sagittarius rising. Oh, okay. That's it's pretty interesting.
Deb:Like, when we get into conversations, I'm like, in my experience, and she's like, I'm telling you, I have gone through the information. And I'm like, it's not the same thing. Yeah. That's that's where that's the only thing. And then but we realize that about each other, and
Serena:we can work through that. But That's why I like Gemini and Sagittarius dynamics, though, because I have a Gemini Venus. I love a Sagittarius Venus person.
Deb:You're pansexual. Big surprise. Anyway, go ahead.
Serena:Yes. That's something I was gonna talk to you about. I was gonna say in your years of doing, like, all like, studying different charts, do you find certain placements to be identify or identify as certain, you know, people? Like
Deb:For queer people, if you will?
Serena:Yeah. Queer people, like, Gemini, Venus, Sagittarius.
Deb:Like, did, like, an article for some UK paper or something about this, but yes. But, like, even in the ones that I found, like, I don't even have half of them, and I'm clearly pretty queer. But that being said, the biggest one that I've noticed is having some sort of air sign around your seventh house. So the movement or some placement that has to do with air, like, you know, something like that is usually a big indicator that there's some free flow when it comes to relationship styles is not typical. You know?
Deb:Interesting. Obviously, Aquarians as well, which is especially that air. You know? Yeah. But and Libra, a little bit, but Aquarius and Gemini are the most around that area.
Deb:It's the combination of things in that person and what's going on with with their particle entanglements, basically, with these planets and stuff like that. So that's why Yeah. No person's the same, not even twins.
Serena:And Not even twins. A 100%.
Deb:I did, like, a research thing on that as well. I had people who were twins, like, you know, I I ran this thing. And what what I figured out is that what's interesting about them is they're exactly the same in some areas. Like, if we could put, like, a little check note if we had to, like, that's not how it works. But if we can put, a little checklist of their placements and be like, are you this or this?
Deb:Because everything is double it's a double sided thing in astrology. Right? There's low vibrations and high vibrations of every part of it. Right? And so what's interesting is they'll either all click exactly the same in some places or opposite.
Deb:Exactly opposite. There's not really a gray area in between for them. So, like, they'll both have a similar ego but totally different emotional states. Like, the opposite of that sign for each of them, things like that. And the ways other people used to do it are just by, like, the few little degrees.
Deb:But degrees in the grand scheme of thing Mhmm. You know, there's a few really important ones, but it's not that big of a difference. So Yeah. Not even that shows me exactly what I think about, you know, queer placements in your chart. I think anybody has the possibility I actually think all of us are very fluid.
Deb:Like, sexuality is fluid, and it's life experiences and things that you've been through. That's why I think that it's more flowing and open now because it's society in general. It's more open and flowing. For sure. And expressed that way.
Deb:I think just before, it wasn't allowed to be expressed. So even expressing a little bit was a lot, let alone Yeah. You know, going to a certain extent.
Serena:Yeah. For sure. One of your
Deb:things was how I identify. And I identify as a lesbian queer, which means because I had to go through that phase. I'm 47. Right? So I'm Mhmm.
Deb:Technically, I'm one of those old the old queers, and a lot of the thinking that older people older queer people had was really different. Mhmm. The hate against not hate, but, like, the little bit of the edge against bisexuals or things like that, right? And I'm I just wasn't that person. So I did, I really strongly identify as a lesbian.
Deb:I think we were like, we're lesbians because it was so hard to be that. Like, we had to come up with some sort of here I am, here's what I am so that you can recognize me.
Serena:And also being protective of like, I feel like a lot of people who identify as lesbians are very protective of that title as well.
Deb:Because it took us so long to get to that point. Yeah. But then at the same time, like, now I don't like that because as I was being my my little slutty self, right, I slept with trans men. I slept with trans women. I slept you know?
Deb:So I was now am I no longer a lesbian because I slept with a trans man? Yeah. Do you see what I mean? Now it's however you wanna self identify. That's why I say I'm lesbian, queer, meaning or a vegetarian.
Deb:I don't know what you wanna call me.
Serena:I love that. Like, I don't
Deb:even feel okay saying that because some some some of these trans men don't consider having a vagina. Yeah. Right? So that's what I mean. I I don't wanna that's why I have adjusted myself to not be just a lesbian but a queer.
Deb:Yeah. And I think that's how I ended up identifying, but I think that with all the labels we have now is exactly what I'm saying. Everybody wants to be noticed and understood that they exist, and then pretty soon, I think we just won't have it anymore. It would just be like, whoever you're dating is whatever like, people will just be more open to that. It won't be as big of a
Serena:I hope. And I think society will get to that point eventually. I'm not sure when Mhmm. When it'll just be okay to date whoever and love whoever and not not really feeling a need to come out. Mhmm.
Serena:Just exist. Just exist. And I hope it happens in our lifetimes, but I'm not sure. And I didn't get there. I've seen so much progression.
Serena:Seen a lot of progression in the younger generations. Gen alpha, that's, like, that's the kids of the generation. Yeah. Mhmm. I think when they enter adulthood and or start, you know, dating, that's when it's gonna start being more normalized.
Deb:I would say so. Yeah.
Serena:Right? And, yeah. But I definitely have a similar journey as well. I I identify as pansexual or queer, and that was like a long journey of me constantly changing my labels and constantly changing. And I think it's because you want to feel like you belong, and also the process of coming out is hard.
Serena:Me, I was straight, and then I was bi, and I was like, that took a lot for me to come out, and then I identified as lesbian. And then I got feelings for one of my guy best friends, and even though I didn't turn into anything, I was like, me getting these romantic feelings doesn't make me lesbian. So I was very much going through an identity crisis. And then after that, I was like, you know what? I'm attracted to anyone regardless of their gender.
Serena:And I don't really like putting labels on myself and who I can love, so therefore queer, pansexual felt feels the most freeing for me. But because of my own journey, I've noticed that a lot of people also go through a journey of, like, fluidity. And I'm not saying everyone's sexuality is fluid, like how mine is. But I think a lot more people are gonna realize that their journey is going to be more fluid than they think, especially as time is flowing, and Pluto is now in Aquarius, and Uranus is in Gemini. I think a lot of people are gonna, you
Deb:know No. I totally
Serena:involved in more queer activity. I don't know. It just sounds gay. Sounds like things are gay
Deb:or resonates a lot because, like like you're saying, trying to find that label similar to what I was saying, but just in a different you know, it's just your journey in that. And I think a lot of people do that, but and and it is about trying to belong to something or not be cast out from a different area, if you will. Right? Yeah. And I think that we will discover that even though you're saying, like, I'm not saying everybody else's is flowing, I say everybody else's sexuality is flowing like that.
Deb:Mhmm. Again, it just like, for me, I'm not probably going to be attracted to a man, but that's just my sexuality and where it flows for me personally. There could be 2% of men out there that I'm attracted to, it could flow there, we don't know, you know what I mean? So that just and also separating your identity of how you identify yourself and the relationships you're in because as an example, my partner is bisexual. Mhmm.
Deb:Right? But we're in a relationship, so she's in a lesbian relationship. Right? Yeah. So it's it's like she that doesn't mean she's a lesbian.
Deb:Doesn't mean she's trying out and she's like, I'm not a bisexual right now because I'm in a lesbian relationship. It's just she's not actively necessarily pursuing men. She might be. I don't know. I'm talking about it, but it could be because we're we're poly.
Deb:So, you know, that's part of that. And I think there's a lot of stigma associated with anybody who wants to, like, probably experienced that and felt a little bit of that, of thinking about dating a man after he's been with a woman. Yeah. As a woman or as, you know, somebody who might identify in that area. So if that's the case and it was really, like, really bad back in the day.
Deb:It was like, you had that that stigma if you're bisexual, you're gonna leave lesbian for the man. That's just how it's gonna go. That's and it just developed this big wall. Yeah. And now I think it's starting to break down some, but A little bit.
Deb:I still think it's
Serena:a big stigma. And that was my identity crisis a little bit, and feeling like I need to be like, hey, lesbians, I'm actually not just lesbian. Like Yeah. Because, yeah, there's a lot of is it biphobia, or is it just a fear a fear of, like, a girl that you fall in love with leaving for a man? But It's
Deb:a learn it's a societal, interestingly enough. Right? Because we're in a sub society, if you think about it, but it's a societal thing that we establish for our heteronormative time. Mhmm. Do you see what I'm trying to say?
Deb:So, hey, I'm identifying as a lesbian and I have to take on all the crap that comes with that. Yeah. Right? From society and whatever. Bisexuals are riding the line, that's not fair, make a decision.
Deb:Yeah. What in the that's the mentality of that but that's why it's such that hard line because it made lesbians feel like they were less than or they shouldn't have been, they're just gonna go back to guys anyway so That they're not is that's a stigma they were holding for themselves, had nothing to do with the bisexuals. Yeah. Do see what I mean? But the bisexuals tended to get that.
Serena:It's a little bit of projection or
Deb:Absolutely.
Serena:Yeah. Maybe something that they experienced in the past and then projecting it. Mhmm. And just understanding that
Deb:every kind of queer human has a different thing. There are passing people which have issues with that. There are, you know, masculine center like, lots of people can assume that I'm a trans man just because I'm masculine of center, I'm a masculine lesbian. Like, I'm not saying that's an issue, I'm just saying everybody has things that they have to deal with, but isn't it nice that we all have our separate things we can deal with now? Instead of it's true.
Deb:Like, it's just this one big thing of like, hey, This, we're all gay versus now we have all these intricacies and different things. So I try to celebrate that a little bit because it's about figuring it out. Yeah. And then we can get to the free flow after that. We have to identify everybody.
Deb:Everybody has to be heard and seen, and then we can kinda open it up for discussion, if you will. You know what I mean? For sure.
Serena:Definitely feeling grateful that we are living in times where it's openly okay or we're getting there to, you know, be out and proud. I know it's hard for a lot of people to still do that. I know there's still a lot of, like, political things and people who don't agree being a part of community, like the LGBTQ plus community. And why it's such a strong community is because we need that community to lean on and to feel understood because there are a lot of people who still don't understand. You're from you're from New York originally, though.
Serena:Right? Yeah. I, was raised in Jersey, and then I moved to Fort Lauderdale three years ago.
Deb:Sorry about that. You know?
Serena:Why? Where are you from? No.
Deb:I'm from I'm actually from Arizona, which is where I'm at now.
Serena:But Oh, okay.
Deb:I I dated the people that I dated after my first girlfriend, all East Coast. All East Coasters, including my ex wife who's from New York. But I did date date somebody from Toms River for eight years. So
Serena:Oh, okay. Yeah. Jersey Shore. That's kind of a little bit by where I grew up. Yeah.
Deb:Wear tough cookies. It that's an experience all into itself. The other thing
Serena:is Jersey girls are crazy. I will say. I have traumatic experiences with Jersey girls. So yeah.
Deb:Just East Coast in general is different than the West Coast in a lot of ways when it comes to, like, even the gay stuff because it's just older there. Like, this shit's been going on forever over there. So it's almost louder, if that makes
Serena:sense. Mhmm.
Deb:It's just like how I talked about my partner and I moved from Portland. We were living in Oregon. I lived there for six or seven years, I think. Okay. And we came back down here because I'd help my mom out.
Deb:So while we were up there, and this is when I was in poly land, which is awesome. Okay? Mhmm. Portland, if you wanna be poly folks, go to Portland. I heard.
Deb:Just go there and have have some fun. Just be careful with yourself, but always be safe. Yeah. But my point is, like, in Portland, we actually have a bit of a battle back and forth between, like, the Proud Boys were there, right, which is the for those of you who don't know it, it's like a white it's basically Nazism. We'll just put it that way.
Deb:Okay? And going up against all this this there's not just queer people. A lot of people in Portland think they're weird and that makes them queer anyway, whether they're a little queer or whatever. Right? So there's always this intense battle, it felt like, between the two even though it's a very queer friendly area.
Deb:Right? And I think that that's where you tend to see the battles the most. Unlike where I am right now, where I am in Arizona, whereas mostly a conservative state. Right? Mhmm.
Deb:I hate it, but at least we're purple. We're getting there. Okay?
Serena:Yeah.
Deb:But but being in a fairly conservative state, we don't really have the issues because they don't talk about it. Nobody wants to talk about it. They don't even wanna bring it up. So it's like here, they don't talk about it a lot. It just doesn't exist to them.
Deb:They just kind of ignore it. Yeah. Whereas in, like, the Pacific Northwest or, like, the East Coast in certain areas, you can see that it's really ramped up some because it's active there. There is Yep. Sort of the visual of it so we can actually see the back and forth versus here where it's like, people just be like, okay.
Deb:We'll be quiet for a minute or whatever while you talk. You know what I mean? Interesting. Yeah.
Serena:That is very interesting.
Deb:We just didn't even hear you say anything in the first place because we were ignoring you.
Serena:Yeah. Basically what it's like. So are there not a lot of, like, queer spaces or events or anything by you?
Deb:Well, no. There is. Like, we have a whole, like, gayborhood here in Arizona, like the Melrose District. We have one of the oldest lesbian bars, Boycott, is here. Mhmm.
Deb:And some other bars as well. But it's just that, like, when it comes to what we're doing in general or what kind of support we need, it's just a different feeling. When you're on the web like, you're up in Portland, it's like a constant thing. It's like there's always something brewing about it. It feels like, like, what's our next thing we're gonna battle versus here where it's not we're not battling as much?
Deb:I don't know how it's coming off, but I'm trying to say that it's just it's different. I'm not saying we shouldn't battle. I think we should battle more, but it's just different kind of feeling than
Serena:Oh, yeah. It it definitely is a different feeling. Even living up North, the Northeast, and then in South Florida, and even going to because I'm looking to potentially move to San Diego sometime soon.
Deb:Oh, nice. West
Serena:Coast. So I was just there. Wasn't it beautiful? Oh, I love it. Like, I I love it.
Serena:My nervous system is just so calm there. Have you looked at your astrocotography? I I did. And I have I believe I have a Jupiter line going through San Diego or right next to San Diego. I have to look at the line again, but it was a positive Yeah.
Deb:Okay. Which Jupiter line? So
Serena:I I have to I have to look again. I'm not that into astrocortography. I I should definitely chat with you about it.
Deb:I don't do astrocortography readings, but I understand it enough to be dangerous is all. Yeah.
Serena:Yeah. I I've been definitely wanting to get more into it because I think it's interesting because I do like to travel, and I solo travel a lot. So I will take a peek at it before if there's anywhere that I solo travel
Deb:and before And know what I do wanna say about astrotography and some people who are like, well, who can just try afford to travel and go to these places that we should go for our line? You don't have to necessarily do that. You can also manifest the things from that line by either, like, doing, a little board of that place or, like, watching shows that are around that place or Oh. It's it's about again, it's all energy. Right?
Deb:Yeah. Everything's up here anyway, so you can put the energy towards that if you need a certain thing. Can always call on those lines if you need them.
Serena:Oh, that's interesting. Mhmm. Yeah. I I the closest line I have to where I'm at in Fort Lauderdale is a Pluto line.
Deb:Well, you were there to transform, sounds like.
Serena:Definitely. And my time is coming to an end here for sure. I think I've learned a lot of lessons here, and I'm ready to kind of move onward. It's interesting that you were talking about, like, the queer community up in New York, because I'm going to be moving up there this summer for a few months before I head to the West Coast, just to have a little reset, be with family and close friends again. And I'm excited to dive into the queer community up there again because I haven't since, you know, 2022 or 2021.
Serena:So, yeah, it's just so different than what it is down here and up there. It's more prominent. It's more loud in your face. Like you said, the the lesbians are more intimidating, for sure.
Deb:But But which which group is more intimidating? The New York ones or the LA ones?
Serena:I would probably personally, personally, I I would would have have to to say say LA because at least I know New York energy, and I feel comfortable with it. LA is a completely different wheelhouse for me and energy.
Deb:They're so they're so similar though at the same time. They all just switch back and forth, if I can be honest with you. They do. A couple of my friends who were in LA are now in New York, and I'm like, look at you. Now you're all in this New York, the New York queer scene versus the LA queer scene.
Deb:And I think
Serena:They do do that. I've been to LA a few times. I don't know what the community out there is like. I've only heard stories. Anything that you're currently working on?
Serena:Anything that you wanna share? How can people connect with you moving forward?
Deb:Know, my socials on Tik Tok and Instagram. I'm also on Facebook too, if anybody actually is still on there. I also have a YouTube channel, and on my YouTube is where you'll see, like, the longer videos of, like, the readings with celebrities or reality stars and things like that. Yeah. I wanna check some of that stuff out.
Deb:But, basically, I like to teach, so that's what I do. On TikTok, I try to go live about once a week to do teaching session on there, so make sure you're following me on TikTok if you're interested in that.
Serena:I love that.
Deb:I do readings. I'm starting to wean those off a little bit because now the book is gonna come out. So, basically, you know, we'll go I'm
Serena:excited for that. Yeah.
Deb:So I'm kinda trying to concentrate more on the book stuff at the moment, but I do those, like, those little five year matches and even, compatibility summaries Mhmm. As well. And it's all on my Linktree. So if if you mind putting my Linktree in here, everybody can find all of that stuff. Yes.
Deb:I definitely will. The shop for any any kind of services I provide, fun little calculators and stuff like that too on my Linktree. But yeah, that's kind of the main push at the moment. Awesome. I will definitely link all your socials in
Serena:your Linktree down below for everyone. Thank you again so much for coming on this podcast. It was such a fun episode. I loved our conversations. It just flowed.
Serena:I don't want to take up too much of your time.
Deb:Thanks for having me. I really appreciate it.
Serena:Yeah, of course. I would definitely love to connect and collab again or even if we hop on a live together or something, I feel like it would be really fun.
Deb:Yeah, absolutely. That'd be really cool.
Serena:For sure.