The Man Warrior King Podcast

In this episode, discover some of the little known truths in the christian marriage help world...the truths about cat energy vs dog energy. Unfortunately many of the church's teachings about how to be a Godly husband leave men acting like dogs running around their wives, tails wagging, trying to get her to notice them. It's time we discover how to be a MASCULINE husband, and a Kingdom man.

If you haven't yet, be sure to grab The DNA of a Man.

Also, if you're interested in working with Matt one-on-one in the Unshakeable Man coaching program...click here to download the PDF writeup about the program and book a free 30 minute REBUILD coaching call with Matt.

Chapters

00:00:01-Introduction to Man Warrior King Podcast

Matt Hallock introduces the Man Warrior King podcast and expresses his excitement for the movement. He also mentions the topic of marriage and being a cat person versus a dog person.

00:00:29-The Cat vs. Dog Discussion

Matt discusses the common preference for dogs over cats, especially among men, and shares his personal experience of being a cat person. He also introduces the idea of being a cat person or a dog person in the context of marriage.

00:03:39-Behavioral Comparison: Cat vs. Dog

Matt describes the behavior of his dog and explains how it relates to the behavior of some men in their marriages. He draws parallels between the behavior of a dog and the behavior of a man in a marriage.

00:07:56-Negative Impact of Dog-Like Behavior in Marriage

Matt highlights the negative impact of behaving like a dog in a marriage, emphasizing the need for confidence and independence in a husband's behavior. He discusses the emotional and behavioral parallels between a dog and a husband in a marriage.

00:14:19-Embracing Cat-Like Behavior in Marriage

Matt encourages men to embrace cat-like behavior in their marriages, emphasizing the importance of confidence, independence, and allowing space for mutual pursuit in the relationship. He contrasts the behavior of a cat with that of a dog in the context of marriage.

00:18:09-Final Thoughts

Matt concludes with a message of love and encouragement for his audience, expressing his care and support for the gentlemen listening to the podcast.

Topics Discussed:

00:01 - 09:57
marriage, cat person, dog person ,emotional dependency, husband wife relationship dynamics

10:03 - 18:20
Anticipation, Attention, Affection, Insecurity, Confidence, Masculinity, Femininity


Creators & Guests

Host
Matt Hallock
Founder of Man Warrior King and author of The DNA of a Man

What is The Man Warrior King Podcast?

You want to live a life on fire and on mission.

You want to be filled with such conviction and drive that you stop caring about what ANYone thinks.

You want to face each day alive, authentic, and fully present in every moment: with your wife, kids, on the street, at the gym, at work.

You want to bring yourSELF to the table, and to stop bringing the watered-down, nice, what everyone wants version of you.

You want that self to be a man who is burning in passion for Jesus, unafraid to bring his kingdom to anyone in your path, no matter the cost.

You want to love the one in front of you without fear, without needing love back, and without reserve.

You want to experience God for real, to not just believe, but to KNOW that he’s got you and that he’ll show up on your behalf. That he’ll show up THROUGH you.

You want to get to the end of your race and say, “Yep…I gave it everything. Jesus, you know I’m all in.”

...And you want to know just how to get there.

Welcome to Man Warrior King. Congratulations. You are among the violent taking the kingdom by force. You are among the chosen, answering the call to rise above your self. You are in the forge being stripped down and strengthened—and you WILL rise stronger, solid, unshakeable.

You are a man. You are a warrior. You are a king.

Good morning and welcome to another episode of the Man Warrior King podcast. I'm your host, Matt Hallock. Man, it's good to talk to you this morning. I enjoy, I enjoy what God is doing in this Man Warrior King movement And I love what he's done through the live through in the lives of the men who have read my book, the DNA of a man. And I'm excited for what's coming next as well. This morning I wanna talk to you about marriage and I wanna talk to you about being a cat person versus a dog person. But

not in the same way that we always talk about. Not talking about whether you prefer cats or dogs. No, it's a little bit different than that. So it seems to me, and maybe I'm wrong, you can tell me if I'm wrong, but it seems to me like the majority of people when asked, do you like cats better or dogs better, I get a sense that most people say dogs. And I could, but again, I could be wrong, but I also get a sense even more strongly that definitely more men will say dogs than will say cats.

If I'm wrong, let me know. But usually it seems like it's kind of like it's kind of like a If you if you're a guy if you're a man and you like cats better, it's not something that you really talk about too much. You might let some of your closest confidants know, but it's a little factoid that you kinda keep, you hold close to your chest a lot of times I don't I'm a cat person in that regard I like cats a lot but I grew up with my dad being a veterinarian I grew up with

10 cats in the house at any given time, which is probably a little overboard. I do not have that at the moment, though we do have 12 animals currently under our care. Only 3 of them are cats, 5 are chickens, 2 are ducks, and we've got a rabbit and a dog. So there's all kinds of life burgeoning out of our household at the moment. But I'm a cat person in that regard. I like them. I don't really understand when people say that cats just hate you. They they have an evil streak in them. They are always

plotting for how to take over the world, I don't get it. I've always had great experience with cats and very affectionate. Yeah, so I enjoy them. Dogs on the other hand, I enjoy dogs, but there's some things that can bug me about a dog and so let me let me shift us over here as a man I want to ask you if you are a cat person or a dog person because the answer carries a lot of influence over your marriage. But it's not whether you like cats or dogs better, it's whether you are more like

a cat or a dog. So my dog might be on the extreme end of the spectrum. Okay, so if what I'm about to say doesn't totally reflect your experience with dogs, please bear with me and just go with it. My dog is very sweet. He's very, he's very kind. He's very affectionate. He, he will, there at times it's very clear that he wants you to be happy with him. He wants to please you. And at other times, not so much. He, In order to be happy, it's quite clear that he needs a lot from you, from

a person. If I'm in the house and I'm sitting down to work on the computer or something like that, he prefers to sit right not just at my feet but on them or to lay on them. He prefers to lay in some way where some part of his body is touching my feet. I've actually had it where I'm standing like in the kitchen or somewhere just like whatever it is I'm doing, maybe just talking and he'll come and sit or lay on my feet while I'm standing there. If I get up and go to a different

room, he will usually get up and follow. If I'm sitting and he's in a particularly wanty kind of a mood, I can just make a motion with my legs or my arms and not even get out of the chair and he will hop to, he will jump up instantly ready to go wherever it is that I'm about to go. There are times when he's really getting on my nerves when He will be so intent on being with me and following me that he will go in front of me and try to predict where I'm going and

he'll continue to look over his shoulder to watch to see if I'm coming and what direction I'm gonna go and all that. And so he can, he can stick with me, but be in front. Okay. Then if he's outside, he, and when we're out there with him, he's usually, quite often, only happy when somebody is throwing the ball for him. If I do that, he's incredibly pumped and stoked and he's quite fun to watch and he has a good attitude. If I stop throwing the ball and I go do work on a different thing, eventually he

will come bring the ball over, stand there, stare at it, and stare at me, and start to grunt, and growl, and a little bit whine, and he'll nose the ball, and, and kinda act like he wants to go run, and he won't stop, he won't quit. If he's outside, and we come back in, and we've tied him to his leash out there, he might be okay for a little while, but eventually he will start barking because he doesn't want to be out there by himself. So okay that's that's my dog. I would like to suggest that

If you behave like a dog and in that sense you're a dog person as a man as a husband in your marriage you are doing more damage than you are good and and it might be like well the way you described your dog, I hope nobody acts like that. And I would hope that too, but it's not the case. A lot of guys, a lot of men act that way in their marriages. You are, you are Latched on to your wife you If she goes somewhere emotionally whether it's into a bad mood or anger or anything

like that you follow her. If she gets into a bad mood it throws you into a bad mood. If she gets angry with you it throws you over. You don't go your own emotional way. Your own emotional way. You are always wanting to have that that reassurance just like My dog wants to sit on my feet, have some part of him touching me. You'll, you want to have some part of your being. It could be physical, it could be emotional, touching your wife. You want to, you want the reassurance that you guys are still okay. You're

still connected Because You're not confident in your own skin and you need that assurance that is she still attracted to you? Does she still like you? Is it still cool that you're around her? Does she still want to be around you? And man, oh man it drives me crazy when my dog tries to anticipate where I'm going and trots on ahead of me but then looks over his shoulder to see if I'm really going where he thinks. Do you do that with your wife? You try to anticipate every step of her way. You try to anticipate

every need, try to hover around her, make sure everything is going correctly and going good for her. You want to be with her everywhere, everywhere she goes. And if you're outside and she's inside, do you start barking? If you're, If you're working on your own part of life and she's working on hers, do you start to feel threatened? Do you start to feel like she's leaving you out, leaving you behind, like she cares about that and there won't be room for her to care about you? Do you want to constantly stay in front of her, in

front of her attention, in front of her focus so that you know she doesn't forget about you? Are you constantly nagging her to pay attention, throw the ball? Are you trying to never let her forget, to always get more, more, more, more? Sex is a great, a great avenue for this to happen for a man. Are you trying to make sure she doesn't forget about it? That it's always top of mind for her. Guys, I know my dog sounds annoying and I talk about him to make him sound annoying, but I'm telling you it's easier than

you think to behave just like he does. And I want it, I want it to be done because that's not, that's not an answer to, to getting a good marriage. It is not the way to produce connection and passion and fire and intimacy. It is definitely not the way to get your wife to be attracted to you. His constant readiness for affection makes it so that I don't want to give it. And it and maybe that's my fault maybe it's not. That's that's happens to be the effect that that type of neediness has. When I pet

my dog, he can't just sit there and take it like a man. He leans really hard into it. He starts to pant and to yawn nervously and he spins all around because he's trying to rub into the petting more. And he'll try to like nudge your hand as you pet him and get you to keep on petting him, he won't just stand there solid, confident, unshakable, allowing the affection to be shown. He has to play it up a lot more. How many of you do this? Your wife gives you some sign of affection and you go

overboard in responding and you over emote right back to her. You over affectionize right back and it turns her off and it's like, no, no, no, I didn't want that. I wanted to be free to show my husband the affection that I want to give him without it, without it pushing him to the extreme limits. See, all of this is a sign of an incredible lack of confidence and an incredible insecurity. It's no wonder the romantic stuff hasn't been working for you if this is how you behave. It's because it's distasteful and it's off-putting. See a

masculine man, I believe in this regard, would behave more like your typical cat. There are times when the cat is ready to show affection and to be pet and there are times when the cat is like, no not right now. It doesn't really affect me right now. Can't bother me. And a cat is very likely to be way more willing to go spend hours and hours and hours outside and not care where anybody else is and go off and do their own thing, be on their own mission. Makes you appreciate when the cat comes home because

even though the cat is not unhealthily emotionally Latched on to you it cares about you enough to keep coming back because it loves you My dog will not end any round of me petting him on his own. He will stay there till kingdom come as long as I'm petting him. But a cat, a cat has no problem getting up and walking away while you're petting it. It speaks of security and confidence. This is the kind of man that you should be with your wife where you are you are very welcoming and and appreciative of affection and

you will show it. And yet there are times when you will end it. There are times when you will have other things to go do. There are times when your wife will show you affection and you will let it let her and you will enjoy it but you won't overreact back in affection. Affection. A masculine energy is not always lovey-dovey, if ever. And I know when I was learning these lessons, I was like, but I like being affectionate. I don't want to not be affectionate. I want the warm, fuzzy feeling. I want the lovey dovey something

or other. Something or other. I want there to be just physical attraction and attachment and closeness. And it doesn't come if you're the 1 who's always trying to make sure it happens. You need to allow your wife the space to pursue you? Yeah, we talk a lot about pursuing our wives, but sometimes guys, you over pursue and she, she feels it and she wants to be able to pursue you in her femininity. So take some of these thoughts here with you today. Let them percolate. There might be some changes you need to make. I love you

gentlemen. Until next time.