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Manhood often feels like navigating through uncharted territory, but you don't have to walk alone. Join us as we guide a conversation about how to live intentionally so that we can join God in reclaiming the masculine restorative presence he designed us to live out. Laugh, cry, and wonder with us as we explore the ins and outs of manhood together.
Introduction to The Restorative Man Podcast
00:00
Jesse, my friend, we are back together again here on the podcast. It is good to be with you. Always, always a good thing, Chris. And for those of you that are listeners and have been listening for a while, you may have noticed that just now I did not say welcome back to the Forge podcast by Restoration Project. And an introduction to myself and to Jesse. And you guys, here's why.
00:28
because we, yeah, drum roll please. We are actually moving the name of this podcast from the Forge podcast by Restoration Project over to the Restorative Man Podcast. That's right. By Restoration Project. And so we're super excited about that. And we're gonna tell you, we're gonna tell you all the things. We're gonna tell you why, we're gonna tell you what's up. We can tell you like where we started with, why we started with Forge.
00:57
and what that meant and why we're moving to the Restorative Man Podcast. So, fucked up, here we go. Let me just say too, I have a very irrational but real sense of like, we're rebranding, aren't we cool? Like, aren't we so elite that we're rebranding? So yeah, just whatever that's worth, you can just knock me off the cool, elitist rebranding thinking. So that's there and.
01:24
Here's how here. Thank you for the invitation. I will take you up on that in here. That's weird. Thanks. Yeah. Because we're not actually rebranding anything. That's true. We're like honing in. We're drawing back into the center. We're kind of gathering everything back into the core of what Restoration Project is all about. And to rebrand means that we'd be completely doing that with a Restoration Project. We are not. We are only doing that.
01:52
here with the Restorative Man Podcast. That's right. So, yes. That's right. Good, good catch, thank you. Get off your high horse and you're like rebranding, whatever, yeah. Not really, actually. Not really, yeah, well, but it is an important move. It is an important shift for us. And so here's the deal. We are calling it the Restorative Man Podcast because at the core of Restoration Project is the vision, the mission, the belief, the calling.
02:19
to be both ourselves as men, and then anybody who's participating with Restoration Projects on any level, we want to like pave the way towards becoming restorative men in this generation. And we're gonna unpack what we mean by becoming restorative men in a moment, but that is the core of what we're about. All of our resources, all of our experiences, all of our, like everything that we do is about the movement towards
02:47
where I am today to become more restorative in my life as a man. That's right. So yes, it's exciting. It is. And I think some of the pathway towards that, the language around the forge, I think was actually even helpful for us in some of the discovery to get into the place of calling it the Restorative Man Podcast. Because right. We love metaphors at Restoration Project. We're unabashed. We are kings of metaphor. Oh my gosh. We are full on addicts to metaphors.
03:16
And so that language of the forge and thinking through the process of becoming the men that God intends us to be and the shaping, right? All of those things connected to the forge language. Again, we love, that's part of the reason that we landed there. But I think as we think about the forge as kind of the description of that process, if I can put it this way, I think that articulates maybe some of the how or the process of becoming, right?
03:42
But the restorative man is actually the articulation of, hey, this is the vision of the end goal of what we are pursuing, right? Of which is a lifelong pursuit that we'll talk about, but it's a little bit of just, hey, yes, we are being shaped, the crucible of our lives, yes, that's true, but to just be even clearer about saying, hey, it's not about the forge and that process, it's about the invitation of Jesus to be restorative men. Yes, absolutely. It is about the men that we're becoming, not the process that we're going through. I love how you just said that. Yep.
04:10
So guys, drum roll please. And welcome back to the Restorative Man Podcast. This is Chris Bruno and I am here with my friend, Jesse French and we welcome you to the first ever and yet not the first ever Restorative Man Podcast. Indeed, indeed. The both hands. The rebranded, the re-centered podcast here. So good to be with you. Thanks for listening.
04:40
So I want to start Chris with a question of, for you around tenses of why the, the tense and English teachers, if you're listening, sorry, I'll probably butcher this. So there's my disclaimer in my head just to start, I'm a simple person. But when we think about tenses around restoration, it actually is one that's really intentional. And so restorative man is what we were calling that, or calling this podcast, it's the vision that we're inviting men.
05:10
into why is it labeled that restorative man instead of the restored man? Yeah, fantastic question. Way back when we first felt called to start this ministry and go in this direction, and we knew that there was something about the word restoration, that we were being invited to participate in something that was already happening. And so God...
05:36
from the very beginning has been about inviting us into creation, into the work of his creation, and into his journey of restoration. He's not inviting us to be better just because, he's inviting us to participate in the process of becoming more like him. It's the whole idea of sanctification too, like how do we come more into the likeness of Christ. And so, when we think about
06:05
the tenses, if we were to say the restored man podcast or the restored man is the vision that we have, there is an arrival, there is a finish line, there is a graduation, there is a moment where at one point you weren't restored and now you are restored. It is not a transition or if you use that word, it is a transition from unrestored to restored. There is a completion.
06:35
who we are as humans and who we are in relation to God is that the work of Jesus was to bring us from the kingdom of darkness into the kingdom of light. That has happened. When we come to faith, that transfer has happened. So it's not about the idea of atonement, it's not an idea of like salvation, it's not that kind of thing. Are you saved? Yes. Are you being saved? That is the question.
07:04
that we're actually asking now. Like there is something that has transferred from the kingdom of darkness to the kingdom of light, and we're still in the process of becoming more that man who God made us to be in the beginning. So it is the present continuous sense, tense of that, that we are being restored in the process of coming to know God and more of who we are. When you say the word restored, there is a finish line.
07:31
Once a man is restored, he no longer needs to be restored. I would really like to meet that man. Right. Like, if you're listening, let us know who you are because that would be a wonderful man to meet. And because I have not yet met that man, I actually believe that all of us are still being in the process of being restored until the moment that we leave this earth. And so to be restorative, then here's the other part of this word.
08:00
is that we are being restored, we're in the process of restoration. But in this, we have the invitation of God to not only do that for ourselves, but to participate with Him in doing that with and for others. So when I am a man in the process of being restored, I'm actually also being invited into the restoration of the world.
08:27
the restoration of the kingdom, the restoration of the community, the restoration of other hearts. So the invitation, I think, of God is not just unto my own well-being and restoration, it is unto the well-being and restoration of the world. That's such an important piece, I think, in that if there's not this ripple effect out into the various relationships.
08:52
fears that we're in, right? If that's not actually leaking out in good ways into those places, right? Then we're missing it, right? That it is, I love that articulation that it is, yes, it is something that is happening in us and we are changing, but that actually has a direction to it and benefactors around that. And then I towards that same restoration that God is in the process of in those other places too.
09:20
to not only do things for us, but invite us into the process as well. It's amazingly generous and so merciful. It's so patient. And so patient, yeah, so patient. So I love that about him, that this is not just, you get a stamp of approval across your forehead and then all of a sudden you're done and you get to go sit in the corner and know there is a participation of this along the way.
09:48
And ultimately, you know, like we said, the shift from the forge to the restorative man is the process of being forged is hard. It is often hot. You get pounded, you get heated, you get bent, like all of that kind of stuff in the process. But it is not the purpose is not to heat and to bend and to pound. The purpose is to become that restorative man who then brings about restoration into the world.
10:18
It is the conduit of the man through which God brings. And women too, let me be clear. This is not just about restorative men are the only ones. Restorative women are just as equally important. And the calling and focus of Restoration Project is to work in the hearts of men. And so that's why we talk about that way. That's right. So I want to ask then to continue some of the unpacking of the word restore and restoration. That has...
10:45
At its root, right. That has this belief that there is an original value, right. That this is not a demolition project, right. But, but restoration infers, there's something originally good and functional and right and beautiful that we are harkening back to that we are wanting to restore. It is not a complete demo and you know, 2.0 it, right.
11:11
If that's true, when we think about the restoration of hearts or the restoration of a house that is restoring the original intent, spend a little time speaking to what then is being restored in the hearts of men, what that Jesus is working, that is inviting, what is some of that original value and some of that original goodness that is in the process to be restored. Oh yeah, absolutely. I love even the language that the Book of Isaiah brings us about when Jesus talks about his own calling and ministry.
11:41
is that he is about rebuilding the cities. He's about binding up the brokenness and like taking what has been broken and putting it back together again. And so the original goodness is yes, there is original sin, but before original sin, there is original glory. That there is something before sin entered the world. And I love that the scriptures give us that. The scriptures tell us that
12:08
you know, whether it's in Genesis or in Ephesians or any, you know, anywhere in between, like there is something before the entrance of our failure. And so much I think of faith and the walk of faith is so focused on the failure when in fact there was something before that. And so just, you know, the whole idea of restoration is to come back to the divine imagination of the sons and daughters of God. That when God
12:37
before he even created humanity, had this beautiful imagination that was so delightful to him that he decided it would be good for us to exist. And then in that delight brought us about and took the earth and breathed into it, as the scriptures talk about, and the result was us. There was something beautiful and wonderful and glorious and so image bearing, reflecting of God himself that it was not only good, it was very good.
13:06
we were very good, that divine imagination. And so to be restored in the process of restoration is not to annihilate the goodness of God, it is to return to the goodness of God. It is to revitalize, it is to uncover, it is to come back to that original value that was placed in each and every son and daughter of God. And that's what we're about. Because he didn't make a mistake.
13:35
that needed to be corrected. He actually, like, we're not gonna, you know, there's not, you know, when I think, if you guys can imagine how many times Jesse and I get either emails, mail, snail mail, or phone calls from literal restoration companies that are looking, you know, to sell us tractors and forklifts and hammers and like all that kind of stuff, like in the- Fire mitigation, supply. Fire mitigation, yeah. Like the world out there doesn't know what-
14:04
what Restoration Project is actually about in many ways. They think that we're about construction, but- Or trails. I was at a, I was sorry to interrupt. I was at a gas station the other day and I had my Restoration Project shirt and the guy when I was paying was like, hey, what do you restore? He's like, is that like, you know, trail maintenance and stuff? And I said, no, it's men. And it was a long day and I just didn't have the energy to actually unpack that. And he just totally blank stared me and was like, cool, cool man.
14:32
Here's your change, have a good night. You know, okay. That's it. Yeah. Oh. But, and here's the thing is that however valuable those trails are and however valuable the world is in the needs for restoration and all that, there is nothing more valuable than the sons and daughters of God. And so to put our hand to the work of bringing about restoration in the hearts of men is just one of the most valuable things that we can do. So I just, I love that.
15:02
Yeah. I want to ask one more question. So you, you just talked about this role of, of ours of being restored as sons of God or daughters of God. Like we use some categories at Restoration Project in the space of sonship, brotherhood and fatherhood. And those are kind of three different lanes that at various points in our work, we focus on, we invite men into deeper understanding. A lot could be said about each one of those. Those are big, deep, deep categories.
15:32
But just kind of talk maybe at a higher level, as we think about the restorative man, the man who's becoming invited into the work of Jesus, why those different roles of his role as a son, his role as a brother, and his role as a father actually are really important spaces that he steps into and has a sense of. Oh, well, I think I was about to use the word the Trinity there, and I don't mean the Father, Son, and Spirit, but maybe I do. It's the Trinity of the Father, the Brother, and the Son.
16:00
is all aspects of who Jesus himself has both referred to himself as and then calls us into deeper places for ourselves. So I think understanding the Father, this sense of like there is the goodness of God has brought about life and has offered life to us and has given us not only His breath for life, but given us His words for life.
16:29
and this emanating energy from the Father is what has brought about all of creation. So that fathering is a part of every man's journey as well, because even if a man does not have children, he is a Father. He reflects the Father in this way and brings life to the world, that fathering energy to the world. And that is part of Jesus. He fathers the world. Everywhere he's going.
16:57
In the scriptures, we see him walking around fathering the world, bringing about safety and comfort and care and tenderness and protection and guidance and wisdom and mercy and compassion. Like all of those things are father aspects of who God and who Jesus is. So that I think to participate with the Father in being a Father is some of what we're about here in Restoration Project.
17:27
Yep. Yep. Then he steps in to being a son, right? And we know, like, can we understand the Trinity? I don't know that we can understand the Trinity. So how does God and three persons, like, how does that? He has always been the son. And yet, as the scriptures tell us, he came to earth as the son. He identifies himself as the son of God. He says, Father and I are one, you know, and there's this sense of the sonship of him. There is something about the belovedness.
17:54
of Jesus, where there is the Father and then the beloved Son. And He is the firstborn amongst all of us. He is the first one to be called the Son. And so there's something about how can we, like Jesus, accept and live into our belovedness with the Father? Yeah. So we both are fathers and we are sons. And every single one of us, just as I said, every single one of us on earth,
18:21
is a father, every single one of us men is a son. There is both a literal sonship that we have from our earthly parents, but then there is the belovedness of the sonship that we have as well. And then finally, in growing into and the incarnation of the son on earth, he then invites his company of men, his cadre of men, into the idea of brotherhood. And he literally says, you are no longer my slave, you are my friends.
18:51
There is something about you that I walk this earth with. And I love the literal humanity of that. I cannot walk this earth alone. Yeah, so much humility. I do not want to walk this earth alone. There is so much humility. Where he could have, he didn't. And so how can we model ourselves after that to be in relationship with other men who are on the same journey and looking for the same God, after the same God, pursuing the same understanding of who he is,
19:20
Like, how can we do that together in an arm and arm with other men? I think that the only thing in all of creation before the fall, the only thing in all of creation that was not good was aloneness. And I think the idea of brotherhood is like, we're gonna remove aloneness from one another in order to be participating in this journey together. And that's the area of brotherhood. So we do this together. Men are made by other men.
19:46
And I think that restorative man is made in the participation with the brotherhood of men. Yeah. Chris, would you say that the restorative man, as he is stepping into that in more full ways, has a growing sense of those different roles in his life and the roles of himself as a son, as a connected brother, and as a father, that as that process unfolds, those roles become more clear? Yeah, absolutely. And even you saying the word role.
20:15
What was happening, and here's the king of metaphor again, what was happening in my mind is, in which situation do I put on a different mantle where I put on the mantle of father in certain moments of my life? I put on the mantle of brother in certain moments of my life. I put on the mantle of son. And it's not like they're, and then the confusing part of the breakdown of the metaphor is that, like they're all always part of who we are. Right.
20:43
And yet which one is kind of on top? And just a few minutes ago, you and I had a conversation with a brother and I was mindful of like, I'm gonna put on the mantle of brotherhood right now. This is actually what is happening. There is a brotherhood space that is where the three of us are in some conversations about some hard things. And that is the mantle of brotherhood. At various times, I need to put on the mantle of fatherhood. And so I think the work of brotherhood, fatherhood, and sonship,
21:11
is becoming more comfortable wearing the different mantles. That's good. And to add another layer to it, I don't have a sweet metaphor for it, but I think some of the sweet mystery of it is, yes, they are different mantles, and I think they, clearly they are connected. And so in some beautiful ways, as I have brothers and am able to be in the brotherhood space, that actually reminds me and connects me to my identity as a son, right?
21:41
that they are not closed connections or pathways, whatever you want to say it, but they actually are connected in ways that the deepening of those spaces in one space deepens those others. As I am in brotherhood and deep friendship with other men, that actually calls me and gives me greater permission and freedom to be able to step into the places where I need to father, where I need to bring my presence in a different way. And so that's some of the beautiful messiness, I think, or the interconnectedness between those different spaces as well.
22:11
And I love how you just said that because we are all, always, fathers, brothers and sons. Yeah. It's just as a matter of like, which one am I inhabiting in the moment? And again, just yesterday was on a call with somebody and they were asking about some struggles that they were having with one of their children, their son, and conversation led to, and so for you dad, who do you have? Who's walking with you through this? And your brothers. Do you have brothers who are here for you?
22:41
Does your son have your brother's dad? Like what is happening here? It is an intertwining of all those things all the time for sure. And I think the beauty of this, all three of those in the restorative man journey is when you have the posture or the perspective of I am being restored, I am participating in God's work in my life and the world around me.
23:06
my posture towards the world is far more like, where is God at work and where can I join him versus where is he not and where do I need to bring him? Yeah. He's already there. And so I'm going to participate in the restoration that he's already doing rather than, you know, trying to conjure it up and generate something, you know. Yeah. Chris, thank you. Thanks for.
23:36
So good. Well, again, welcome to the Restorative Man Podcast, everybody. It's now a hundred percent officially changed from the Forge podcast, which had a good run and we still love the name and we still use forges in various places and ways. And this is now the Restorative Man Podcast.