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The Rabbi Aryeh Wolbe Podcast Collection is the one-stop shop for the Torah inspiration shared by Rabbi Aryeh Wolbe in one simple feed. The Jewish Inspiration Podcast, Parsha Review Podcast, Thinking Talmudist Podcast, Living Jewishly Podcast and Unboxing Judaism Podcast all in one convenient place. Enjoy!
Welcome back everybody. My name is Rabbi Aryeh Wolbe and we're continuing the 48 ways Way number two the second way of acquiring Torah acquiring happiness maximizing life We said way number one was with study to study and to learn I want to just add one little nugget To what we spoke about in the previous podcast and that is that in Judaism We recognize that there's just as there's a four-step process in Agriculture we plow we plant we harvest and we consume so to in study
We need to learn things four times and if you look in the Talmud every page of the Talmud has four lines of commentary above it and The reason our sages tell us is that before you turn that page Study what you've learned four times Before you move on so I think that's very very important for us to remember whenever we study Review what it is that you're learning so that you have a grasp of clarity to the subject
the next is bishmiyata ozen which is with listening with the listening of the ear a Person we mentioned this in way number one that we need to always be learning from situations But we also now need to be listening to our messages There are messages that are being sent to us constantly by the Almighty and by the things that go on around us Hashem sends us constant messages, and we need to listen to them Very interesting that we see in the Torah when we talk about the adulterous woman
Immediately following that portion of the Torah it talks about the Nazir the Nazarite and the Nazir should abstain From drinking wine there are several different restrictions that fall upon a Nazir and our sages ask Why do we put the adulterous woman right next to the Nazarite? Sarashi explains he says because it's a message if you needed to see a woman who is put on trial for having an adulterous relationship There's a there's a message being told what got her into this problem. She drank too much wine
Ah, it's a message stay away from wine. It's a message. This constantly messages sent our way Make learning opportunities your teacher listen You know it's an incredible thing is that we learn in the Torah so much by the order in which things are placed and in the Location of where things are placed if you were writing the Torah Where would you put the Jewish people receiving the revelation at Mount Sinai the Ten Commandments?
Where would you put that in which portion I would find a portion named Moses or Joshua. I'd probably find a really special portion No, it's found in a portion that's named for a non Jew who later converted. His name is Yisro In the portion that's set for his name is where the Torah is given to the Jewish people Why? Sages tell us because there's a message that he teaches us in the first word in that portion is Vayishma and Yisro heard he got the message
He heard and that's something it's the prerequisite for Torah study is to listen to those messages and hear them to hear them through and through Everybody has their own world. Everyone has their own talents their own skills their own abilities Everyone has their own world That they're living in and we have to know that world pay attention to that world My grandfather's teacher Rabbi Yerucham Levavitz in the MIR in Poland Would give discourses and lectures to his students talking about current events
And if you wonder why would he teach about current events because current events teach us about Lessons that we need to learn that we need to incorporate in our lives, you know, it is it is an incredible Story that I heard from Rabbi Noah Weinberg. He says that he once met a student Backpacking across Europe and he met him actually at the Kota at the Western Wall on his last day before he was heading home So he says Nusa, how was how was Israel?
you know you finally at the Holy Land you went the Thailand and you went to India and you went all over the Far East now, you're in Israel. Oh, how was the Holy Land? So the this young backpacker says to Rabbi Noah Weinberg. He says I'll be honest with you It's not so holy. I didn't see holiness So this is what you mean you went to the holy city of Tzfat and you didn't see
Holiness, he says no says you went to Tiberias where Maimonides buried. You didn't know no holiness. You went to Hebron Yes, no holiness nowhere here at the Western Wall. No, no holiness So the rabbi said, okay, if you didn't see holiness, at least did you enjoy the beautiful Bafouf sticks? This is Bafouf sticks. What's that? This is what I mean these the big Bafouf sticks everywhere you go. You see these these says I Haven't seen them He says you mean you went to to to all of these places
Oh, you went to Haifa and you went to the Golan Heights and you didn't see Bafouf sticks. He says rabbi I don't know what Bafouf sticks are. I don't know if I Actually saw them the rabbi says so what is holiness? What is holiness? You know for sure you didn't see holiness Tell me what's your definition for holiness? We always need to ask questions We mentioned this in the first way we need to ask questions Never assume that you understand the definition of anything ask and inquire
Pay attention to what people say and what goes on around you most people sadly today don't listen They don't listen to the simple messages that are being told and they're saying it with their own mouth They're saying it but their own ears. Don't don't hear it People ask for advice. I see this constantly as a rabbi people ask for advice and don't listen to the answers They're not listening for your answers. And it's it's it's it's troubling when people are living a life where it's just
It just is and they're not willing for any any input whatsoever Listen to the lessons of the past and learn lessons from it from your experience We all have life experience a child that's one day old has one day life experience But a but someone who's an adult In their 20s in the 30s in their 40s in their 50s 60s. They have a lot of life experience in fact my rabbi used to say that and this is a
Actual halacha that someone who is over 70 years old whether they're Jewish or not Whether they're a rabbi or not, you have to stand up when they walk into the room Why because someone who's lived life 70 years has a lot of wisdom and we respect wisdom You have to stand up for them It's an incredible thing My rabbi would also say that anyone who has a has white here White is like the sign for information center
When you have a white a white white here means this person has life experience and you can go listen learn lessons from them the Fundamental difference between an adult and a child is that the child sees the world in one dimension that one dimension is now an adult Hopefully hopefully this is the case with most mature adults is that they see life in Three dimension, right? They use the past experiences and future vision to help navigate the present. I
Have a vision to accomplish this using my past history. I'll apply it to it right now Yonah what was Jonah and the whale? He got the message eventually He's tried to hide from a message but listening and hearing messages is not such a given son. Not such an obvious thing My grandfather I once walked into his study and he was very very happy I can see his face was beaming I said Saba. What are you so excited about? He said I heard a lecture from my rabbi
50 years ago, and I just understood what he meant Now I'll tell you why today we don't remember what we did. We ate for breakfast yesterday The reason is because we have a tremendous reliance on technology. We have video to capture the moment Photography to capture the moment we have audio recording to capture the moment So we're using less of our own resources I think sometimes we're not using our own resources and
Absorbing the information and thinking about it and listening to it again and again and again to understand what it means Yeah, hopefully if that's something that we can change in our lives and be less reliant on technology to do the hearing for us Then it's a great it's a great it'll be worth this class for us to gain even one ounce of less reliance on technology Another question that should be asked is what does this idea mean to me in my own words? We have to make it ours
You can hear a concept. Okay, but now make it yours internalize the idea Make it practical to your own make it usable for yourself Put things you hear into action you hear a story you hear a midrash you will learn a Halacha you learn a you know a law a custom you hear a story. It's inspiring You know, they say that people go to a lecture Do you know how much information they remember by the time they walk out of that lecture about 5% and
if we became more accustomed if we became more accustomed to Listening really hearing deeply the messages. It'll be a life-changing experience. Also part of listening is to accept criticism Appreciate criticism. It makes you better Criticize a wise person and he will love you for it Because a wise person understands the value of seeing another perspective and even if that person is wrong in their criticism of you it still gives you a perspective that you didn't have and Appreciate it ignore the messenger or presentation take the message
Now the rules of criticism. We know the rules of criticism. We mentioned here before but the rules are that if someone is Willing to hear you're obligated to say if someone is not willing to hear the criticism You're obligated not to say this is a Talmud in Tractate Yevamot, which teaches us that That just as there's a mitzvah to reprimand mitzvah in the Torah to reprimand someone who will listen is a mitzvah to not reprimand Someone who will not listen and that's very important
Make sure that you do it out of love Make sure that you really have a love and the proper intention for the person who you're telling this to this criticism Because if it's not with love, it's not it's gonna fall on deaf ears Unfortunately accepting different perspectives is a very important part of this Only there's a saying that's only the neighbor here is both sides of the story, you know You have us couple fighting the neighbor, right?
I'll just tell you a funny story at once we once had a rabbi in our house visiting this is back when I was a child even I was many many years ago and My parents were having some type of not disagreement but just like a conversation they said let's ask the rabbi the rabbi's like no No, no. No, let me tell you a story Says there was once a couple that someone visiting in their house and this guest never left. They couldn't get him out
He was there for one day two days three days four days and like let's come up with a scheme so the couple came up with a scheme we're gonna get into an argument and we're gonna fight and We're gonna ask him for his opinion and whoever he chooses their side. The other one will kick them out So they got up to this fight and they they go to the rabbi the rabbi rabbi you tell us who's right?
He's like, I'm not saying a word. You're gonna kick me out if I say, you know, he got it right away We can laugh about that. But in reality We it's sometimes it's crazy to hear two sides. I've had many couples come here and talk to me about marital issues and It really is amazing that if they took a step back and listen to themselves, they can solve their own problems They can solve it rather quickly Usually people are just too
Stubborn and they don't want to listen to anything effective listening gain a depth of understanding It says in the Torah that the Torah was given at Mount Sinai there was 600,000 different perspectives to the Torah Shishim reba upon him la Torah. There's 600,000 different Perspectives to the Torah, you know why because there was 600,000 individuals standing around Mount Sinai who heard the revelation when God pronounced the Ten Commandments So yeah this, you know, I'll tell you an interesting story. I've said this before
you'll remember the OJ Simpson case and I remember I was pretty young. I was in my I was a teenager then and We Were coming coming back from shul one Shabbos and my neighbor is an attorney and we were talking over the case Yes, he what do you think? I said, I think for sure he's guilty and he said well I I don't see it that way and he gave me a beautiful Eye-opening lesson. He said I'm an attorney and as an attorney
I need to understand the other side's perspective in order to argue it and If I don't see the other side's perspective, I can never properly argue their side Okay, it's very important and as as human beings if we want to grow we have to be able to see another perspective you know, whether it's in marriage whether it's within a partnership in business, you always have to be willing and Ready to hear just even here or understand another side, you know the the ex
Mossad chief mayor Duggan was being interviewed by Leslie Stalin 60 minutes on a rooftop in Tel Aviv and she said Do you think the Iranian people because it was at the time where Iran was saying death to Israel death to America every day? Pronouncing it clear. It's like they wake up and we say Modani. Thank you. Hashem They say death to Israel death to you to the USA. She asks mayor Duggan Do you think that they're rational people and this is the following words quote?
The regime in Iran is a very rational one. This is March 11th 2012 I saw this interview and it was brilliant what he said He followed it by saying if we don't understand the rationale of the Iranian regime We will never be able to overcome it They have a rationale I don't agree with it, but they have a rationale and we have to understand that rationale if a bed Dean rules 100% against the defendant He goes out free. Why someone has to be able to see his side
Someone has to be able to see another side and that's part of Shemessa Ozen listening listening a little bit listening to the other other perspective and then the last part is When you listen You don't have to be Silent you can ask it says law habation limit Someone who's shy will never learn if you're not willing to ask Challenge them ask them for proof be an active listener but on the other hand Yagla hamash Tika the other hand a
Sign of wisdom is someone who's able to keep their mouth shut to get to be silent meaning To be listening and to be silent My mother told me this listen and silent are the same letters We have two ears and one mouth All right, we should be hearing double what we speak Listen, it's such a powerful thing And then I want to just end off here that Rabbeinu Yonah says if a master hits a servant and injures him
So if he injures his eye, he pays only the value of the eye, but if he injures his ear And he pays the value of the full servant he pays the value of the whole human why that's how important listening is and The missioner concludes it says a fool disturbs in others words Why is he called a fool which is very powerful? Because he doesn't listen So my dear friends, let's take this way number two, employ it to our daily lives and let's listen. Let's hear the message and get a clear picture of What's going on around us? Effective listening is the key to a happy and successful life