Journey to the Sunnyside

Morning-you makes promises. Evening-you breaks them. There’s a biological reason for that. When stress rises and energy drops, the salience network starts prioritizing immediate relief over long-term goals. Learn how to shift which version of you is in charge — without fighting yourself.

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Disclaimer: This podcast is not intended as medical advice, and the views of the guests may not represent the views of Sunnyside. If you’re concerned about your health or alcohol use, please consider seeking advice from a doctor.

Creators and Guests

Host
Mike Hardenbrook
#1 best-selling author of "No Willpower Required," neuroscience enthusiast, and habit change expert.

What is Journey to the Sunnyside?

Journey to the Sunnyside is a top 1% podcast, reaching over 500,000 listeners every week. It’s your guide to exploring mindful living with alcohol—whether you're cutting back, moderating, or thinking about quitting.

While Sunnyside helps you reduce your drinking, this podcast goes further, diving into topics like mindful drinking, sober curiosity, moderation, and full sobriety. Through real stories, expert insights, and science-backed strategies, we help you find what actually works for your journey.

Hosted by Mike Hardenbrook, a #1 best-selling author and neuroscience enthusiast, the show is dedicated to helping people transform their relationship with alcohol—without shame, judgment, or rigid rules.

This podcast is brought to you by Sunnyside, the leading platform for mindful drinking. Want to take the next step in your journey? Head over to sunnyside.co for a free 15-day trial.

Disclaimer: The views expressed in our episodes do not necessarily represent those of Sunnyside. We’re committed to sharing diverse perspectives on health and wellness. If you’re concerned about your drinking, please consult a medical professional. Sunnyside, this podcast, and its guests are not necessarily medical providers and the content is not medical advice. We do not endorse drinking in any amount.

Speaker 1:

Hey, everyone. Welcome back to another one of these ten minute Mondays. And today, let's start with something simple. Have you ever noticed that version of you, say at 6AM is not the same person as the version of you, say at 6PM? You start your morning, let's say very clear, very optimistic.

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You're thinking about goals. You're thinking about your workout. You're thinking about your long term health. Then let's flip it to the other side. Evening you is tired.

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It's a little worn down. Relief sounds a lot more important than all those goals, those optimizations that you were thinking about at 6AM. Most people will look at that and think, boy, I'm inconsistent. I really need to get disciplined. But that's not actually what's happening.

Speaker 1:

You don't have one stable self running the show all day. Your brain actually builds a version of you based on your current state, And that version shifts depending on what's happening in your body. And your brain, it runs on networks, not one command center. There's the default mode network. That's the self story, your autobiographical identity, who you think you are.

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There's the executive control network. That's for planning, inhibition, long term thinking. That's your prefrontal cortex territory. And then there's the salience network. Its job is simple.

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It decides what matters most right now. And here's what you need to know. Those systems, they don't fire equally all day. At 6AM after sleep, the executive network has more influence. Long term rewards, they feel real and important.

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Future oriented thinking feels natural in that state. But by 6PM, after stress, cognitive load and maybe physical things like lower blood sugar, that balance starts to shift. The salience network starts to prioritize immediate relief. In the brain, it tends to follow whatever is most salient. And that's what we call state dependent decision making.

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Now let's layer something on top of that. Humans naturally discount future rewards. A benefit tomorrow is valued less than a benefit right now. And when we're stressed or we're depleted, that discounting increases. So better sleep tomorrow loses to relief tonight.

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And morning self and evening self, they're not enemies. They just operate on different timelines. At 6PM for example, relief is really strong. The glass is there. The habit is familiar.

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Tomorrow's energy is abstract and abstract usually loses to concrete. Now it's really important to understand that that has nothing to do with how much you care, but instead because the brain follows what feels real in that moment. And this is why willpower, for example, feels really unreliable. Willpower assumes one consistent decision maker, but identities shifts with our state. Now here's where you actually get some leverage.

Speaker 1:

There's a level of you that can observe what's happening in your mind. And in neuroscience, we call this metacognition. It's the ability to notice your own thinking. And here's why this matters biologically. When an urge hits, it usually starts in a faster emotional circuitry.

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The limbic system, the amygdala, these systems are quick. They're built for survival and they care about relief and regulation. The prefrontal cortex, that's the part involved with planning and inhibition, works slower. It's more deliberate. It needs oxygen, glucose, and bandwidth.

Speaker 1:

When you're tired and stressed, that prefrontal system is already taxed. So when you say, I really need a drink, you're letting that fast system drive. But when you say, I'm having an urge to drink, something measurable shifts. And there's research on this that shows that when people name an emotion, activity in the amygdala decreases and activity in the prefrontal cortex increases. It's called effect labeling.

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You're not suppressing the urge, you're regulating it. And that small sentence creates separation between stimulus and response. And in that separation, executive control has a chance to come back online. You're not eliminating the 6PM self. You're changing what network has influence.

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And from there, you have options. So the real question isn't, do I have discipline? The question is, who's in charge right now? Because the brain follows salience. So instead of arguing with the tired self, do something smarter.

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Use your environment. And there's research on this, on episodic future thinking, that shows that when people vividly imagine a specific future outcome, it reduces temporal discounting. And by doing this, the future carries more weight in the present decisions. But we can't just use imagination alone because that's not going to be enough. Your environment can activate identities automatically.

Speaker 1:

So for example, running shoes by the door activate a different version of you. A water bottle sitting where the wine normally sits changes the decision landscape. This is called neuro priming. You're increasing the salience of the future you in the present moment. So instead of fighting the 6PM self, you're giving tomorrow's self a visible cue.

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And here's the experiment. Tonight, before that vulnerable window hits, place one physical anchor for tomorrow's win somewhere visible. Not five things. One thing. Maybe lay out your workout clothes.

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You can fill out that water bottle that you always take to the gym. Or I love this one. Write one sentence from tomorrow you and leave it where you can see it. Make future you visible. Then when that moment comes, pause and label it.

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You know, I'm noticing the 6PM self wants relief. And by using that instead of I need a drink, that sentence creates distance. You're not necessarily suppressing their urge. You're just instead observing it. And when future you is visible in the room, the decision feels slightly different.

Speaker 1:

Not perfect, of course, but more aligned. In those slight shifts, they do compound. You don't need a new identity. You just need to understand which version of you is active in choosing who's in charge. Okay.

Speaker 1:

Thanks for hanging out with me today. If you got anything out of this, please rate and review. Of course, reach out to me. I'd love to hear from you. Mike at sunnyside dot co and until next time, cheers to your mindful drinking journey.