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We rank sleep, peanut butter, and Sam Elliott on the List of Every Damn Thing.
Phil and Jake rank everything.
My neighbors were having a party once, and they were Okay. Dancing the limbo rock and partying in the backyard. And I looked out my window at them, like, I pulled my drapes to the side, and I looked at them, and I was, like, jealous that they were having a party and that they didn't invite me and that they were dancing to limbo rock. They were partying.
Speaker 2:So lim the limbo rock? I've never heard of the limbo rock.
Speaker 1:Yeah. The limbo rock is a song I feel like if people are dancing a limbo, that's the song that they're listening to. Like, it's a song it's called it tells you you have to get low. It tells you, you know, it it Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack goes over under the limbo stick. It tells you the rules of the game.
Speaker 1:Okay. It's not a narrative. It's not it doesn't tell you where the song was graded. It doesn't tell you that that it's the latest, it's the greatest. It assumes you already know what the limbo is.
Speaker 1:I think it was, like, already some kind of a fad before this song. Although, I kinda think that I don't really understand much about limbo. I do know that, like, it was it's it's sort
Speaker 2:of a place where you don't wanna be.
Speaker 1:Yeah. It's a place where you don't wanna be, where, the you have to wait for the the eternal judgment, so you don't wanna do that. It's funny that they they need to dance after that.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:There must be something more going on.
Speaker 2:When you're really truly limboing, you're floating in the space between, like, falling and and and standing. You know what I mean? Yeah. You Like,
Speaker 1:You're neither here nor there.
Speaker 2:Yeah. And I think that's it. If you if you're doing it right. You know?
Speaker 1:Yeah. I suppose so. I just it's one of those things where you can't tell when you listen to a song that's about a dance. Like, are they inventing this dance? Or are they, like because they're telling you to do the dance like you already know, but that's the the first time anyone ever mentioned it.
Speaker 1:And I feel like I think limbo kind of existed. Like, you know the song mashed potato time? I like the song. It's a great song.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:But it assumes that you already know how to do the dance, because they don't tell you how to do it. You know? Like, the Humpty dance, they tell you, he tells you, like, here's the here are the steps to take to do to do the Humpty dance. You you know, mashed potato time doesn't do that. So,
Speaker 2:Oh, really? That's a shame.
Speaker 1:Limbo tells you you have to go under the stick. I think the most important thing is that they tell you that it's the latest and the greatest. Like, if they if they tell you street. Or if they tell you, like, everybody's doing this brand new it's a brand new dance. Everybody's doing it.
Speaker 1:That's why a song like, Let's Twist Again, I it kinda leaves me cold because it's, like, again, like, I wanna This
Speaker 2:is last year's song.
Speaker 1:Yeah. I don't wanna hear last
Speaker 2:year's song. I wanna hear it twice. Isn't called the twist. The dance is called the twist again.
Speaker 1:No, man.
Speaker 2:I mean, it's got the exact same steps as the twist, but it's But you It's the twist again.
Speaker 1:But we did it last summer. It's like, I wanna know what you're doing this summer. Like, you know, this goes back to a complaint I've had for many years over the plot the title of the movie, I Know What You Did Last Summer and its sequel.
Speaker 2:If you
Speaker 1:go that hard on the title, it's really hard to make the sequel, like, stay that good. Like, how do you keep that? You know? And it's like, I still know what you did last summer is not a good title, but then what are you gonna do? They're trapped.
Speaker 1:They're victims of their own success.
Speaker 2:You know? That's so I know what you're doing this summer.
Speaker 1:Yeah. Oh, I I I how about this one? I know what you're going to do next summer.
Speaker 2:I know what we're gonna do is start the podcast.
Speaker 1:Oh, nice. Nice. Hello, and welcome to Every Damn Thing. It's a podcast where we rank everything. I'm Phil.
Speaker 2:And I'm Jake, and we're here to guide you through the list of everything.
Speaker 1:Each episode, we take items and tell you where they rank on the list of everything. The list can be viewed by going to every damn thing thing.net. You can find the link in the show notes.
Speaker 2:So we've known each other a long time. Once while asleep If
Speaker 1:I recall correctly, our eyes were closed and we were snoring.
Speaker 2:That's right. Honkshu, honkshu, and so on. Anyway, we started dreaming and Morpheus, the lord of dreams appeared and showed us a ranked list of everything.
Speaker 1:We memorized the list, of course, but then we were jostled awake. Honkshu. Byformius, the lord of not dreams. Honk Shu. Byformias, the lord of not dreams.
Speaker 2:Honk who?
Speaker 1:And the sudden transition from the land of dreaming to the waking world made us forget the list.
Speaker 2:We can only access the list little bits at a time through a scientific process called honk shooting the shit. That's how, with the help of our friends and listeners, we reassemble the list of every damn thing.
Speaker 1:The list is now at 292 items with Dolly Parton at the top and transphobia at the bottom. Gary Busey and Jeggings are in the middle of the list to give you some idea of what it is. Now, again, you're always asking, are we are you sure we mean Gary Gusey and not very goosey? Yes.
Speaker 2:Barry, we know you're out there. You we know you keep on getting worried that we're talking about you.
Speaker 1:You're mishearing us.
Speaker 2:But, no, Barry. We're talking about Gary.
Speaker 1:Also, talking about leggings. We're not talking about jeans that look like leggings. They're actually leggings, but are made to resemble jeans.
Speaker 2:So if you wanna look at the complete list, go to every damn thing dot net. You can find a link for that in the show notes. Mhmm. And it's me and you, Phil. What's up, man?
Speaker 1:Oh, well, one thing was, I listened to this podcast. Right? And it was a Okay. Carina Longsworth podcast about the Hollywood stuff.
Speaker 2:Oh, I see.
Speaker 1:And she's talking about Flashdance, and she really had a a spirited defense of Flashdance. It's not the greatest thing ever made, but maybe we rank it too low. Maybe we gotta, like, reconsider.
Speaker 2:We we could. I don't think that it was submitted for re ranking, which is something we'll get to at the end of the episode.
Speaker 1:Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah. So shout out to Karina Longsworth Yeah. Yeah. And to the, the what's the name of that podcast?
Speaker 1:You must remember this. She did a a Flashdance after we did a Flashdance episode. So we're we're sort of leading the conversation nationally.
Speaker 2:I I was in Pittsburgh last night. And
Speaker 1:Saturday night? Steel Town Girl?
Speaker 2:It wasn't Saturday night, but that song Maniac started playing, where it was, which is exciting to me.
Speaker 1:The whole town stops and everybody sings along to it.
Speaker 2:Yeah. We started dancing. No. The last time I was in Pittsburgh, I also heard that song randomly, like, through no, cause of my own.
Speaker 1:You think it was kismet?
Speaker 2:Yeah. It was kismet.
Speaker 1:Now sleep That's right. Is an activity. Pardon me if I'm wrong here. I think all animals have have to have some kind of sleep. Like, pretty much they all do.
Speaker 1:You know, like, I I've never seen a sleeping ant, but I know that at night I don't see him around, so they must be sleeping. Like, for the most part, animals sleep. I know we do. All mammals seem to sleep, although they seem sometimes it's hard to catch them sleeping. Like, you never see a sleeping mouse.
Speaker 1:It'd be really cute, though. You know? But, like, Yeah.
Speaker 2:If you owned mice, you might see that.
Speaker 1:Yeah. At night, they probably sleep soundly. Right? I my cat is asleep all the time. I it's like it sleeps in a planter box in the backyard.
Speaker 2:Bears sleep, like, all all winter and whatnot, and I think at night too.
Speaker 1:Now does that count as sleeping? Because they it's, like, extra hard.
Speaker 2:Yeah. I think it counts as sleeping. Okay. I mean
Speaker 1:What about if you do some kind of guided meditation? Does that count as sleeping?
Speaker 2:I think so. Yeah. If you, like, have traveled into the land of nod
Speaker 1:Oh, okay.
Speaker 2:Dream life. I think even, like, nodding off, like, if you're high on heroin.
Speaker 1:Oh, you fall asleep at the wheel and you crash the car. So that's a dangerous
Speaker 2:I mean, that for sure. Yeah.
Speaker 1:And and
Speaker 2:If you're not re like, if you're not aware of the the your, surroundings Uh-huh. And your eyes are closed and you're laying down, that's probably sleep. Sleepwalking, I suppose, counts too. That's a bad kind of sleep. And in that case, I don't think your eyes
Speaker 1:are closed. Funny. You do that. It's like, you know, you're walking around. That might be you might be having an adventure.
Speaker 1:You might, like You might. Go to the store.
Speaker 2:You might, like
Speaker 1:construction site and you walk across. You ever see the cartoon where Olive Oil is, gets sleepwalking? And she's walking you got people You
Speaker 2:sure she's not hypnotized?
Speaker 1:Yeah. A 100%, man. People forget here's something people forget about. People so then maybe it was actually, but what I'm saying, when people forget about these Popeye cartoons, these are 3 handed cartoons. This is the stars are Popeye and Bluto in olive oil.
Speaker 1:It's not it's a Popeye is, like, the main character, but there's a lot of stuff that they put a lot of love into Bluto and Olive Oil doing stuff.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1:And they're really well designed characters.
Speaker 2:I mean I mean, the Popeye's the Popeye cartoon at first wasn't called Popeye. It was called, like, I forget something.
Speaker 1:Thimble Thimble Thimble Thimble Thimble Thimble
Speaker 2:Thimble Theatre. It was it was about a cast of characters, and he just turned out to
Speaker 1:be the most popular ones we started
Speaker 2:focusing on him.
Speaker 1:That's why he's on our list so high. So He's eye popped. Yeah. When he was squinting so hard. So here's the thing about sleeping.
Speaker 1:You need to sleep.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:And most people don't get enough sleep. One thing the problem is Freddy Krueger attacks you when you're asleep, which you can't do if you're not asleep, but staying up all night can be really dangerous too. There's problems with sleep deprivation. I remember reading about a French scientist. This would have been like, he's a enlightenment era thinker.
Speaker 1:Right?
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:He had decided that sleep was nothing but a distraction, and he was gonna not sleep at all. But it had disastrous results. It didn't work. Right? Like, if you really wanna torture somebody or punish them, one thing you do is you deny them sleep because it, like, it really wrecks you.
Speaker 1:You know, that's they're doing that to people in Guantanamo right now, I bet. So you need to have it, but your body can live without it, but your mind can't. Right? So I think that like sleep is an absolute necessity, and it feels so nice to sink into a soft bed. Now I like to sleep in the morning more than I like to sleep in the evening.
Speaker 1:I'll I'll sleep in late. Right. On the weekend, I'll sleep in as late
Speaker 2:as that. Sense.
Speaker 1:A real sat count.
Speaker 2:Say that word again. I like that word. I like that phrase. I don't
Speaker 1:know what you
Speaker 2:mean. A sack hound.
Speaker 1:Sack hound. It's
Speaker 2:an army phrase. Right?
Speaker 1:The Englishman
Speaker 2:is always trying to get sleep.
Speaker 1:You're always trying to catch these. Like, you know how you see Bido Bailey and he'll be, like, asleep, but, like, he Yeah. He the sarge thinks he's standing there, but in fact, he's, a there's z's coming out of him or something like that. Right? Yeah.
Speaker 1:So he just trying to catch his z's.
Speaker 2:I was actually thinking about sat counts recently, and I was thinking about army and, like, how in the army you're deprived of sleep, especially at the beginning, during boot camp to break you down mentally
Speaker 1:Oh, yeah.
Speaker 2:So that you can turn into a killing machine or whatever.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah. And how boot camp notwithstanding, just like in in war or whatever, how how much you must miss sleep. And, you know, I could see Beetle Bailey or anybody trying to, like, catch as much sleep as they can because that I mean, really, it's important to it's like it's presented as something, like, shameful maybe, in Beatle Bailey, but, like, I I recently have started learning how to how to nap. I always had trouble with napping before mainly because my mind is active. Every time I try to lay down to nap, I wouldn't have the patience.
Speaker 2:I'd think of something that I should or could be doing, and so I just couldn't relax and fall asleep. I think with a little bit of like meditation or sort of like not not maybe meditation. Maybe just more like those apps that help you help you relax. I've learned to take naps maybe just because I'm getting older. And now I can do a little nap.
Speaker 2:And if I haven't got enough sleep, like, even 10 minutes, which I don't think is quite counts as sleep, but, like, the rest,
Speaker 1:the amount of resting you do. I think every minute counts. Okay. I I got something for you. The the people called in the army, like, Israel, World War 2 era, There's something called a sack artist, and a sack artist is a person he can sleep while marching.
Speaker 1:He can sleep, like, while the sergeant's telling him to do something. He can he can sleep at any time. He has, like, no and, like, I'm jealous of I I had low level insomnia for much of my life. My my brain Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:I can't have I can't drink caffeine after, say, like noon, after lunchtime. It's just not a good idea. Right? But I think like, oh, if only you could be like that, but then I'd have no problem falling asleep, like, in the morning. Anytime before noon, I can fall asleep just fine.
Speaker 1:It's anytime after that.
Speaker 2:I kind of have that trouble too. Like, I like I I'm gonna wake up at the same time every day, essentially. Oh, yeah. If I woke up at 7 today, I'm probably gonna wake up at 7 tomorrow. And if I go to sleep at fucking if I woke up at 7 today but don't go to sleep until 1 or 2 or 3 today, I'm probably still gonna wake up at 7 tomorrow.
Speaker 2:And and often when I wake up, the mind starts going, like, and I just can't, like, I'll still be tired, but I can't go back to sleep.
Speaker 1:Yeah. You'll be thinking like, oh, did I put flash dance too high on that list? Do you know that like the Yeah.
Speaker 2:I don't hey. I I was I was pushing for Flash Tance to be even higher.
Speaker 1:I mean Because because the actress, if not the, you know that, like, at the in the final scene when she does the backspin, that's the same dancer that was in the street that she watched. It's the same person doing the move. And, also
Speaker 2:I did not know that.
Speaker 1:That the actress is by a Hey.
Speaker 2:Hold on hold on a sec, Phil. Uh-huh. I'm sorry. I have not listened to that episode of, You Must Remember This Yet, and so I don't want you to spoil it for me.
Speaker 1:Oh, okay.
Speaker 2:But we could talk about it next time.
Speaker 1:We'll talk about it next time. So I was thinking, like, being deprived of sleep is a torture. Right? Like, it's it's one of the roughest things to be deprived of. It breaks people down.
Speaker 1:It it destroys them. So I think it should be pretty high on our list. Right? We have, like, these things.
Speaker 2:You could So I I
Speaker 1:you could have, like, sex taken away from you or bicycles taken away from you, and you could, like, live a life. You know what I mean? People do that to themselves willingly. A lot of people aren't having sex or not riding bicycles or they're not drinking coffee. Right?
Speaker 1:So, like, we have these things pretty high on our list, but maybe sleep should be higher than all of them and maybe higher than Dolly Parton.
Speaker 2:I understand that. I feel that, and I recognize, you know, how important sleep is and how, like, it's important to to to get it. Like, I'm on tour right now, and it's a very busy tour. It's got a big production. We've got very late nights and and early mornings.
Speaker 2:And I'm one of the people that has to sort of be awake from beginning to end, you know, or close to it at least.
Speaker 1:Yeah. You appreciate your sleep.
Speaker 2:It's I've been out for, like, 4 weeks. And there's pretty much every week there's been, like, many days during the week where I'm only getting 4 to 5 hours of sleep. Sometimes less than 4. Sometimes multiple days
Speaker 1:in a row. You look like a $1,000,000, man.
Speaker 2:Oh, thanks. I don't feel like it. I'm pretty tired right now. But, so I I I appreciate that. I I get it, you know.
Speaker 2:But another way to think about it is, like, I recognize it's necessity, but begrudgingly because, like, what if we didn't have to sleep? Like like, the concept of sleep is great, but I don't need if if I could if I could choose not to sleep, if sleep wasn't necessary
Speaker 1:You're like that French that French guy who, you know, I think he, like, had disastrous results. He really messed himself up without sleeping.
Speaker 2:But if we could do away with the principle of sleep, that would be good. Then we wouldn't then we wouldn't have to I'm not I'm not against resting.
Speaker 1:I mean, that's like why amphetamines were existed. That's like why but why the air force was giving those to the pilots. Right? Because Yeah.
Speaker 2:So it's good it's good to get sleep because you need it, but it's not good to need sleep. That's I guess that's my point.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's a good point. That's a good call. Okay. I I I I see the point you're making here.
Speaker 2:So for me, I would, like, be, like, wait wait maybe somewhere in the middle. Like, if to balance those two things out
Speaker 1:Because the need for sleep is is punishing, and it makes it difficult for you.
Speaker 2:Yeah. And also, like, if I could get more done, you know, or do more things, you know, like, if I didn't have to sleep.
Speaker 1:Would you wanna live a 24 hour life?
Speaker 2:Well, if I did, I would try to do things that were calming some of the time and relaxing and enjoyable some of the time. But, like, for example, right now I've been very busy juggling a bunch of things, and if I had all those hours that I needed to sleep or if I wasn't tired from not getting sleep. I don't know. It's kinda like a double edged sword. Does that make sense?
Speaker 1:We have some sleeping in here. Sleeping naked is on our list.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Yeah. Where's that at?
Speaker 1:164. About halfway down the list, like you said.
Speaker 2:Right? Yeah.
Speaker 1:A little lower than halfway, actually. I I kinda think it should be higher because sleeping naked is like one small segment of all sleeping. Right? Right. It's not really any better or worse.
Speaker 1:It just seems like having pajamas on is pretty nice. You know what I mean? Like Yeah. Like, when because you wear that hat with the tassel on it, and then you get that candle with the you know what I'm talking about? That candle holder.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1:And you hear you hear a loud sound, you creep down, and you know, and you're wearing slippers, of course.
Speaker 2:One problem with sleeping naked is is yeah. I mean, it's it's it's to me, it's not as good as sleeping with wearing something. And also sleeping naked.
Speaker 1:You wear a simple simple Yeah. Shift.
Speaker 2:Something like that. Yeah. Also, if you're sleeping naked and there's an earthquake or something like that, then then you're naked. You run around naked in the neighborhood.
Speaker 1:Oh, you run out the house, and you're like, help help an earthquake. And it wasn't really an earthquake. It was just the garbage truck going by, and everyone's laughing at you. Yeah. Because it happens every week.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Alright. So then let's further
Speaker 2:go a little bit higher than that. So if we go up to, like like, literally halfway at the list as we mentioned, in the intro is Gary Busey and Jay Gings.
Speaker 1:Oh, yeah.
Speaker 2:To me, like, somewhere in there would sort of help balance my begrudgingness of the sleep with the the the fact that I respect that it should be gotten.
Speaker 1:Okay. Well, then I think it should go below Popeye's chicken because Popeye's chicken, although it's about the pain and death of the chicken, it also is about the joy of the person eating it. Where's the popcorn? Is number 137. So I
Speaker 2:So the I mean, the chicken the chicken has to go into a permanent sleep, in order to for you to have enjoy the Popeye's chicken. I don't know. Now that you bring a Popeye's chicken, I think that sleep should go a little bit higher Okay. Okay. Than the middle of the list.
Speaker 1:Well, then let's look at goats. Goats are number 127. They're beautiful animals. Have you ever seen a goat take a nap? It's very peaceful.
Speaker 2:It could go up by goats, I think. Let's see. Blade, the
Speaker 1:fictional one before he sleeps all day. He's a day no. Wait. He sleeps at night because he's a day walker.
Speaker 2:I don't does he sleep at all?
Speaker 1:I kinda think he doesn't because he walks in the day, and he does more vampire stuff at night. He's allowed to walk in the day because he's I
Speaker 2:think burrow round blade is a is a good place to put it because blade is, like works
Speaker 1:for me.
Speaker 2:Is okay. Good.
Speaker 1:Yeah. But the kid
Speaker 2:He represents, like, the duality of it. You know?
Speaker 1:Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 2:The the paradox to find the snow. Stalker. Yeah. Yeah. So, let's put it right below Blade though because sleep doesn't have sunglasses and whatnot.
Speaker 2:So sleep, the activity goes in at number, 125.
Speaker 1:That
Speaker 2:that works. Dan Aykroyd to 126. Mhmm. Let's take a break, and we'll come back and rank the next thing.
Speaker 1:Okay. Welcome back to the show. We're gonna rank the next thing. It's submitted by 2 people, which means there's a the streets are calling out for this. People are asking, why haven't you ranked this yet?
Speaker 1:The topic is peanut butter. Now peanut butter is made by grinding up peanuts. That's it. You can put other stuff in it. You can get spicy peanut butter.
Speaker 1:You can get chocolate peanut butter. You can get
Speaker 2:Now do the oils in the peanut butter make it Yeah. Oh, that's oh, really? I thought that you had you had to add something to it. I could be wrong. I didn't look into the the bad aspect of it.
Speaker 1:There there are kinds of peanut butter that if you get the all natural peanut butter and you look at the ingredients in the back, it says ingredients, peanuts. And sometimes it will say peanuts.
Speaker 2:Oh, wow. That's great.
Speaker 1:Right? That's cool. And and Yeah. Because they need salt. If there's no salt But
Speaker 2:they don't add oil to it. They don't add something to soften it up.
Speaker 1:I guess this
Speaker 2:is my question.
Speaker 1:No. Oftentimes You
Speaker 2:can, but you don't have to.
Speaker 1:Yeah. Traditionally, like the peanut butter you you probably had when you were a kid is, like something like Jif, or like if you eat Reese's peanut butter cups or something like that. And what they do with that is, I think they take the peanut oil out, because peanut oil is valuable and can be used for other things. Yeah. And then they use, like, a hydrogenated oil that, is smooth.
Speaker 1:That's why you don't need to stir it because it's solid at room temperature, so it doesn't it doesn't liquefy.
Speaker 2:When you're using, like, the peanut butter with with oil and whatnot, and you get oil on your hands and stuff, do you have, like, a jiff rag that you can, like, use
Speaker 1:to wipe it off? Well, yeah. You gotta get a jiff rag. Yeah. Of course.
Speaker 2:Oh, by the way, so hold on. So I'm gonna read what Stefan, wrote to us when he submitted this. Stefan says it's super American. This is talking about peanut butter. Yeah.
Speaker 2:No one else likes it. When I first moved to the US, I thought it was disgusting. It wasn't even really sweet. It was even a little salty and it clogged your throat and you could barely swallow it. I didn't get it.
Speaker 2:But after 10 years, I started to like it and now I love it. The same is true with my Colombian girlfriend. She's been in the US humble brag. She's been in the US for 6 years. And like most immigrants, she thought peanut butter was disgusting, a ridiculous food.
Speaker 2:She didn't get it at all just like me and most other Europeans that I met. But now she also loves it. But see So I guess it's an acquired taste.
Speaker 1:What here's the thing about it is Europeans will put that hazelnut spread on things. So they they they it's not like the concept is that foreign to them because they use hazelnuts. They have they know what a hazelnut is, and they use it, like, whenever they get the chance. And they're putting it on what's that spread that has the chocolate and hazelnut together?
Speaker 2:Oh, Nutella.
Speaker 1:So what I'm saying is Yeah.
Speaker 2:But peanut butter is a peanut butter is a specific taste, and it's also the I mean, Nutella's like a sweet it's like almost like a pudding almost or it's different. I can see that. Like another example of somebody who, is a friend of ours who, who is not from America, who doesn't know how to use peanut butter. I think I've told maybe told this story before on the podcast, but our friend Alastair, I was with him once in in Europe, I think. And he was putting, he's making a sandwich.
Speaker 2:And I saw him put peanut butter on a sandwich and piece of bread, and then he's English, by the way. And then put mustard on it. And I was like, what the fuck, dude? Like, you've you're making a peanut butter and mustard sandwich? And he's like, hey, man.
Speaker 2:I'm English. I don't fucking get peanut butter. It I like I don't I don't I don't have rules about it, and I can do it whatever way I want. And What do you he's free? I I I tasted a sandwich, and it tasted fucking good, man.
Speaker 1:It wasn't like it was not
Speaker 2:anything you're used to.
Speaker 1:My mother makes good. My mother makes a sandwich where she has peanut butter and, like pickles. And Yeah.
Speaker 2:I've heard of that. Yeah.
Speaker 1:It seems crazy to me. And, like, I I don't remember her eating it when I was growing up, but, like, it's a thing that, like, she'll have from time to time when I see her. And I'm like, this is crazy to me, but it, like, you know what? She she's just living by her own rules. It's like she's free.
Speaker 1:You can do what you want with peanut butter. Now my son likes peanut butter and honey sometimes. I like a peanut butter and a traditional peanut butter and a strawberry jam. I also I prefer almond butter, the to to peanut butter. Mostly it's because I'm a fancy boy and I from California, and I like to waste a lot of water, you know?
Speaker 1:Yeah. So so I Yeah. I prefer to have, I get almond butter sometimes, but, it's
Speaker 2:I'm getting there with almond butter too.
Speaker 1:Yeah. Peanut butter is good stuff, and it's, like, also the most you get the most calories per, like, tablespoon of anything. So if
Speaker 2:you're starving
Speaker 1:or if you're going hiking or backpacking or something like, it's
Speaker 2:very useful. Stuff like that. Yeah. For or just for, like, having a snack for the day. Yeah.
Speaker 2:It's very useful if you throw some jelly on it. It's really good. I mean, it tastes fucking great. Like, peanut butter tastes great by itself.
Speaker 1:I bet that's how Stefan how he cracked the code was that he ate the peanut butter, and and it was stuck in his throat. That's why you need people put jelly on it.
Speaker 2:That's one problem with it though. I mean, is that you gotta have something to wash it down with. Yeah. Like, if you're on a hike and you eat it and you don't have something to wash it down with
Speaker 1:You might die.
Speaker 2:It's you you might you might choke. I mean, that's why they make the is is it the got milk commercial is he's eating peanut butter, isn't he?
Speaker 1:I don't know what it is because he's he's on something.
Speaker 2:It's something. It's it's gotta be peanut butter.
Speaker 1:Okay. You
Speaker 2:gotta wash it you gotta wash it down with something.
Speaker 1:Now Michael Bay made that.
Speaker 2:So that
Speaker 1:is that's a negative one second. They're in Burad.
Speaker 2:That's Michael Bay. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Well, I think we talked about Michael Bay on this show.
Speaker 2:So peanut butter, it's not strictly an American thing. George Washington Carver invented it.
Speaker 1:What are you talking about?
Speaker 2:You know, Phil, that's according to the National Peanut Board, that's actually a myth.
Speaker 1:I kinda think believe it.
Speaker 2:I understand why you believe that. Because I
Speaker 1:and you heard me tell me so when I was a kid.
Speaker 2:You know the famous peanut pamphlet he wrote in 1916? Yeah. By the time he'd written that, like, many people, like, you know, even way back in 1800s had already developed and Did they put
Speaker 1:a pamphlet?
Speaker 2:Or did they have a pamphlet though? They didn't have a pamphlet. No. So it's true that, George Washington and Carver did invent the peanut butter pamphlet. Yeah.
Speaker 2:So he gets credit for that
Speaker 1:at least. Look. Peanut butter.
Speaker 2:It had been around since it had been around in the US since 1800. There were also similar things earlier, like, in apparently in in Suriname, like, when when it was a Dutch colony in the 1700
Speaker 1:Is that where peanuts come from? Where are peanuts native to?
Speaker 2:I know Aztecs and Incas were making were grinding peanuts. So maybe it's from the Americas. No. I got it from the Americas.
Speaker 1:I got something to say about peanuts.
Speaker 2:But I got I got a picture about Suriname.
Speaker 1:Oh, okay. I'm sorry.
Speaker 2:This is colonial Suriname. They were making, in 1700 something really similar to what we have today, but they called it peanut cheese. Was it Was
Speaker 1:it fermented?
Speaker 2:I don't think so. Okay. But it's like a Dutch thing. I don't
Speaker 1:know how to taste. In Europe. If you go to Trader Joe's, they sell it, and I know it's a popular snack in Europe, and it's like corn chips with peanut on in them. It's like peanut and corn chip together.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:And it it seems like again, it's like that that doesn't follow the rules of what I think you would do with peanut butter, but, like, to me, that you don't put corn based things with peanut based. It's just like it it they don't go together. But Yeah. It's again, like, that goes back to what we were saying, in the last episode about, strip clubs serving food. It's like, just because something it doesn't seem you know, like, we're trying to be open minded about these things.
Speaker 1:Now I have a theory about peanut butter, and this is kind of an edge case. My family doesn't agree with me, but I'll tell you. So you know how there's, like, extra smooth peanut butter, extra crunchy peanut butter, etcetera? Have I told you about
Speaker 2:my onion? Talked about this on the podcast before.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So, like, peanuts are a form of peanut butter. They're just, like, the absolute crunchiest kind of peanut butter. If you look, peanut butter just says ingredients peanuts. You could just buy peanuts.
Speaker 1:And once you crunch them up, they they're in your mouth and they're peanut butter. And, like, that's all that you do to make peanut butter. So, like, why can't you just why why there should be a brand of peanut butter that's just
Speaker 2:a jar of peanuts. Wait. Is a cow a form of butter?
Speaker 1:No. Because you have to milk the cow and churn the butter. All you have to do to make peanuts into peanut butter is chew it. Like, that's all it is. You could actually put peanuts just put a sprinkle of peanuts onto your jelly sandwich and eat that, and and it would be the same.
Speaker 1:It would be the same, Jake, because it's just the
Speaker 2:No. It has to go through the it has to go through a process. It has the spell recipe put on it.
Speaker 1:You know what the process is? Being ground up, and that's what your molars do.
Speaker 2:But there's a certain ritual involved, I think.
Speaker 1:You have to say the incantation.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Yeah. The incantation is I am making peanut butter. Okay. And then when I make the peanut butter
Speaker 1:when I'm chewing on peanuts. So anytime I eat peanuts, I think, You can't. I'm making peanut butter. I'm making this peanut butter in my mouth Because that's all peanut butter is is peanuts. If that's all it is, right, and I'm eating salted peanuts.
Speaker 2:So When you eat when you eat, like, a carrot, are you saying, I'm making carrot butter?
Speaker 1:Yes. Every time I eat anything, Jake, I say, yes, I'm I'm saying if I drink water,
Speaker 2:I'm just I'm making a bagel butter.
Speaker 1:Yeah. Exactly. I'm making bagel mash. I'm I'm mashing it up. So let me just I wanna be very clear.
Speaker 1:When I'm ranking peanut butter, I'm taking into account also totally unground peanuts because that's peanut butter to me. It's just the it it's in its most raw form. It's like the most the most like, you think you're you think you're all natural because you're having a peanut butter that you have to stir? I got peanut butter. It's just a jar of peanuts that comes, and I open it.
Speaker 1:I sprinkle them out. And then I No.
Speaker 2:That that's not fair. You have to you you can't take any, whole peanuts. You have to take in whole peanuts that have been chewed. There's still a process. There's it's like it's otherwise, it's just peanut.
Speaker 2:There's still a process. So if you wanna include peanuts that have been chewed and spit back out No.
Speaker 1:No. No.
Speaker 2:There's something something has happened to the peanuts to make it peanut butter. Why do
Speaker 1:I spit them out? No. Yeah. Peanuts that I have chewed up are now peanut butter, so I'm counting those.
Speaker 2:Yeah. But but, like, peanuts you haven't chewed up are not peanut butter.
Speaker 1:Okay. Fair enough. I just I I I had to just get that out there because this is, like, a personal belief of mine. It's a conviction that I held pretty strongly to. I think that, like, it's a matter of degrees.
Speaker 1:Like, there's a spectrum of of smoothness to crunchiness. Right? And so Yeah. Once we establish that, we realize that all peanuts are peanut butter. Just some of them have and now once they're out of the shell, of course.
Speaker 2:It's a process.
Speaker 1:Have the you can't have the skins on them, and they can't have the shell on them. And then they can then at that point, they are peanut butter.
Speaker 2:That's like saying a caterpillar is a butterfly. No. It's
Speaker 1:not. It's more like saying
Speaker 2:It is. Yes. It it metamorphoses the peanut metamorphoses through your mouth for some sort of process and time into peanut butter. It doesn't need
Speaker 1:time, though. Like, because all I need to do is eat
Speaker 2:it. To mash it.
Speaker 1:Yeah. By chewing it, but that's what you do anyway. Like, you chew the peanuts. So, like, why why
Speaker 2:okay. You're the only nobody nobody who have you met one person who agrees with you on this?
Speaker 1:No. Not yet. But that's why I'm putting it out there. That's why I'm putting it out there. Okay.
Speaker 2:Okay. Listen to me, if you agree with Phil on this
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Well, you know every damn thing.net. Any listener
Speaker 1:we had to turn this off a long time ago, they were like, oh, am I still listening to this bullshit? Yeah.
Speaker 2:If they listen to much of the episodes, They would have heard this to have this exact same conversation. Oh, okay.
Speaker 1:I'm sorry. I didn't mean I just realized I talked about it on mic already. Yeah. Okay.
Speaker 2:No. It's fine. It's because some people you gotta treat every episode like it's a person's first episode. So we're gonna have to go over every single thing we've listed and explain why we've listened.
Speaker 1:Well, Jake, I have to treat every episode like it's someone's last episode. So I wanna make sure, like, to insult them on the way out, and, like, tell them I didn't I don't wanna listen to this anyway. Get, you know, get the fuck out of that kind of stuff, you know. So yeah. So I'm ready I'm ready to make peanut butter.
Speaker 1:Yeah. I'm ready. Okay. Let's talk about foods and substances, I think.
Speaker 2:It's pretty fucking good.
Speaker 1:It's good. It's good.
Speaker 2:It does dry ground. Up there. It should be up it does dry you out. That's one problem. But but, like, many foods need to be you know, many solid foods need to have something to wash them down with.
Speaker 1:Now there's some comfort the
Speaker 2:highest ranked food because I feel like it it deserves to be about as high I I feel like it's almost close to being a perfect food.
Speaker 1:Well, the first thing food we have is Itz It, Right? Which is an ice cream cookie sandwich.
Speaker 2:Pretty pretty high. Very high. Top 10. But the next food down is
Speaker 1:pickles with 1 By
Speaker 2:the way, when I said it's it is 8, I didn't mean eaten. I meant it's number 8. It's ranked to number 8. Yeah.
Speaker 1:It has it has an 8 though. It
Speaker 2:down down down on number 20, we have pickles. And, honestly, I would put peanut butter above pickles.
Speaker 1:Would you put peanut butters above backpacking or the Spice Girls?
Speaker 2:Peanut butter goes great together with backpacking.
Speaker 1:Wait. Okay. Could you imagine? There's these girls. They they're all singing about girl power, and they're all from the they're all from the UK, and they're just all dancing.
Speaker 2:They're in
Speaker 1:your face. But it turned out when you, when you went to look at them and you went to the concert, it was just 5 jars of peanut butter. It was like, one was crunchy, one was smooth, one was just a bag of peanuts. Right? Would you be disappointed, or would you be even happier?
Speaker 1:Would you be like, this is even better?
Speaker 2:I can't imagine that I would enjoy a concert performed by or these are inanimate jars of peanut butter?
Speaker 1:No. They're anthropomorphic. They're walking around, and they're dancing.
Speaker 2:I might like them. That might be fun. Yeah. What if there was a peanut butter spice? What if the 6th Spice Girl was peanut butter spice?
Speaker 1:Wait. What is you can buy spicy peanut butter. Was
Speaker 2:no. It's ginger spice, baby spice, scary spice, and peanut butter spice. She would be pretty cool. I think that it should go above the Spice Girls. And and Okay.
Speaker 1:Well, Renee's gonna hear this maybe. You know, it's possible she'll hear this.
Speaker 2:Oh, yeah. It's the English people are English listeners are not gonna agree with this.
Speaker 1:Yeah. Yeah. Like, you know, we mentioned we mentioned Lucy Pinder on, and then, Lucy Pinder was like, yeah. I I heard this Phil Phil and Jake are talking about me. You know?
Speaker 1:Like, she's invited to the show, you know, if if she ever needs it. Of course. Yeah. Yeah. Speak my mind.
Speaker 2:And we've already ranked peanut butter, though. So Yeah.
Speaker 1:Well, I I doubt she I doubt she has an opinion. I bet I doubt that Randy has an opinion on it because
Speaker 2:Oh, English people have an opinion about peanut butter. Trust me. Okay.
Speaker 1:Because we were talking about food from her country. Okay. So let me think. You wanna put it above spice scrub or below forest bathing. Now forest bathing is just walking around in the woods.
Speaker 2:No. No. It's immersing yourself in the sights and sounds and natural beauty of woods in a way in a in a contemplative and meditative state. It's not just walking around in the woods. So have you ever been present?
Speaker 2:Do you know that are you are you familiar with this?
Speaker 1:Present in my own body? No. Never. Yeah. Very, very infrequently.
Speaker 2:So it's kinda like that. I think that it could go below forest bathing. I'm fine with that. Forest bathing seems like a great thing. I've done it some, I feel like, and I would like to do it more.
Speaker 2:So Do
Speaker 1:you like crunchy peanut butter or smooth peanut butter?
Speaker 2:I like them both, but I think I prefer crunchy.
Speaker 1:Me too.
Speaker 2:Peanut butter, the food I guess I prefer the number 18. We got another one in the top 20. It's moving Spice Girls, the music group, to number 19. And, let's take another break, and we'll come back and rank another thing. Okay.
Speaker 2:We can come back now.
Speaker 1:Jake, do you like boiled peanuts? Because I love them. And I don't know if those count. Those count, but they're in our shells, so they can't be peanut butter. But they're wet.
Speaker 1:They're mess, man.
Speaker 2:I do love boiled peanuts. They are wet. They are in their shells, and I love them too. Someone should submit those for us to rank. But in the meantime, let's rank Sam Elliott, which was submitted by Jamie m.
Speaker 2:This fellow is an actor. And, he's the third thing we're gonna rank. I'm gonna read what Jamie wrote to us when she's when she submitted Yeah. Sam Elliott. She said, the mustache, I feel, is the Parmesan cheese to top off the beefcake.
Speaker 2:Mask, the movie featuring one of your faves, Cher, is a real good one with his mustache ride t shirt. He's got a t shirt that says mustache ride in it. And then she tells the story. She's she says, I worked the Woolsey fires in Malibu. This is a couple years ago.
Speaker 2:I think she was a a firefighter, forest firefighter, helping in some way in in that capacity. His house was fine, but I got to job walk on his property, meaning, I guess, check out, make sure there was no fires. I didn't meet him, but some of my coworkers did and said he's really nice and very good looking as expected. So, yeah, this is a guy that, he's he's a real hunk. He's an actor.
Speaker 2:He's got a Yeah. Wonderful voice. And and one
Speaker 1:of the top mustaches that you're gonna ever see. Like, it's Yeah. He's probably it's probably like him, Tom Selleck. I don't really know who else would be the 3rd mustache. Stacy Keach?
Speaker 1:Yeah. Charlie Chaplin or something like that. You know? It's like Yeah. There's not there's
Speaker 2:not You like that mustache a lot, the Charlie Chaplin one?
Speaker 1:No. I'm not a big fan. It kinda got ruined. But Okay. I mean, at one point, that was, like, one of the 4 mustaches.
Speaker 1:Like, you know, people are like Yeah. Oh, you know what? Who who who is It
Speaker 2:was like that one, the big super twisty one.
Speaker 1:Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. I'm I'm saying, but, like, the look has served him really well. Like, okay.
Speaker 1:I watched these old things that he was in because I saw the Mission Impossible TV show. Now what's one weird thing about Mission Impossible TV show is, cause I like the Tom Cruise movie, so I thought, oh, maybe I'll watch the old TV show. One thing about the one thing about the old show that's weird is it uses the same music from Star Trek a lot. Like, when they get in a fight, You know? Because I saw a lot of star types
Speaker 2:growing up. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Desilu Desilu Studios, it's called. So, anyway, he they brought him on, like, not in the first couple seasons, but he came on later. He was, like, the young, hunky guy who they brought on. This is, like, early seventies. Yeah.
Speaker 1:And he's just, like, this this hunky young guy with no mustache, though. So with before the mustache came out, he was just I felt like there were other guys like him. You know what I mean? He was like not to say that he wasn't a good looking dude, but it was it wasn't until he got the mustache that he really started to pop. And then he got into, like, westerns, and that's when Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah. In this in the seventies eighties, he started really doing, like, smaller roles, character roles, or any of them bigger and bigger roles in, like, TV movies and other stuff.
Speaker 1:And that's like A lot of gravitas. Yeah. Like, you know, when you when you see him saying something, you're like, oh, or, like, then you'll see him in, Coen Brothers, the the
Speaker 2:Big Lebowski. Yeah. He plays the stranger.
Speaker 1:Yeah. And he's like he's like basically the narrator. And this guy is what's up. You know? He's the real deal.
Speaker 1:You think this guy should narrate just about everything. Like, he can narrate nature documentaries. He just got a tremendous voice. Now as I recall, he does, I wanna say he does Ram voice over for Ram trucks.
Speaker 2:Who does Dodge? Dodge Dodge trucks?
Speaker 1:Who does Ram?
Speaker 2:And he also does Kurz. Maybe maybe Ram is a Dodge?
Speaker 1:Yeah. I so he does a triage.
Speaker 2:A lot of voice over, but but, like, the ones that I think are really most
Speaker 1:brands. Like, that guy
Speaker 2:Big brands are are Dodge and Kurz.
Speaker 1:Yeah. I think that, like, he's one of the most in demand voices. Like, if if you're trying to if you're trying to get somebody with a voice, that's whose voice you want and has a lot of authority. Yes. Anything that's trying to have any kind of western
Speaker 2:Masculinity.
Speaker 1:Yeah. Masque western masculinity, traditional. And that's why, you know, he got he he had some comments. There was a movie that, a Jane Campion movie that came out, and he was criticizing it.
Speaker 2:Now hold on. Before we before we talk about the Jane Campion movie, I do wanna say you haven't seen the movie. Right?
Speaker 1:The Jane Campion movie? Yeah.
Speaker 2:Power of the dog.
Speaker 1:No. He told me he told me it wasn't any good. He made some comments about it, but he didn't like it.
Speaker 2:There's some there's some spoilers. If people have seen the movie and don't know and don't wanna know anything about the movie, there's stuff that gets revealed. There's some spoilers to follow, so skip ahead if you don't wanna hear about spoilers in that movie. Okay. Yeah.
Speaker 2:But so I listened. Did you listen to the the WTF with Mark Maron he was on? No. No. So he got in trouble for it.
Speaker 2:He essentially said he wasn't very articulate. But he he talked about the movie, said it was a piece of shit. But and, but he mainly essentially said he he complained about that it's not a good good portrayal of the American West. And Yeah. He called it a piece of shit western, and he used the phrase with allusions to homosexuality without going very much into it.
Speaker 2:That's the spoiler bit.
Speaker 1:Because it's like Power of the Dog is about deconstructing ideas of, western ideas of ideas traditional ideas of American masculinity, and it's concerned with that's the project that's in terms of then I get it. I would say, like he also said that Everyone's got their opinion. You know? True. True.
Speaker 1:And so, like, I feel like a lot of people maybe were kinda hard on people on this list based on a bullshit opinion they had. Like, man, if you wrote down I mean Like, if someone what if you you asked me and then, like, where should we put Phil Green? And, like, you know what he thinks about peanuts. Right? You gotta go at the bottom of that list.
Speaker 1:So I understand.
Speaker 2:There's there's a different the difference about what you might think about peanuts, like, sort of a harmless thing, and and and saying something really hurtful to people. He also he wanted he he also said during it about Jane Campion, who's a woman from New Zealand. He's like, what the fuck does this woman from down there, meaning New Zealand, know about the American West? And, as a side note, Campion, she said, he's really hit the trifecta of misogyny, xenophobia, and homophobia with this phrase. But, to your point as to, like, what does it matter what he thinks?
Speaker 2:Well, Sam Elliott seems to think that it matters what he thinks because he, apologized not much later.
Speaker 1:Uh-huh.
Speaker 2:He said, you know, I didn't, I wasn't being articulate in what I was saying. He said, I I I'm quoting him now. He said, I said some things that hurt people and I feel terrible about that. The gay community has been incredible my entire career and I mean my entire career from before I got started in this town. Friends on every level and every job description up until today.
Speaker 2:I'm sorry I hurt any of these friends and someone that I loved and anyone else by the words that I used. So, yeah, if someone says something fucking terrible
Speaker 1:How terrible is what he said? I can And,
Speaker 2:actually, isn't that it actually isn't that bad. The shit, man. I can't That's a that's a different point.
Speaker 1:Also, like
Speaker 2:He didn't he what he said wasn't that terrible, but it it it it's he mainly because he didn't he didn't get much into it, but, like, what he left, unsaid or maybe maybe he wasn't maybe he wasn't unsaid, you know, maybe because because because he I'm not being very articulate now. Why? Because he wasn't very articulate, it could it could be interpreted a lot of different ways. But the main point the the the most important thing is that he acknowledged what he said and and
Speaker 1:And I'd say, hey, I'm sorry.
Speaker 2:Clarified that he that he misspoke and that that he that maybe what he maybe what he said was wrong.
Speaker 1:I'll tell you what I think is a problem with Westerns is there are so few Westerns being made now that every Western that's made has a lot more weight. So you're like Right. Well, like, 2 thirds of the Western, the last, you know, major this is made by a studio, released by a studio, you know, major pictures. Yeah. Like, 2 thirds of them are like, it's it's rare that there's that it's not some sort of, Deconstruction.
Speaker 1:Deconstruction or
Speaker 2:comments. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Evaluating the myth or or about Hollywood history or, you know, it's like you don't because there's not a 100 tossed off westerns a year that that, you know, that are that are in the traditional mold. Right? Like, the kind that we're the showing when when, when this guy grew up. So it's like I I was thinking because it's like, you know, eventually, there's not gonna be superheroes anymore movies anymore, and there'll be something else. Yeah.
Speaker 1:There'll be some other genre that'll be dominant.
Speaker 2:And there's gonna be a shitload of, like I mean, not that there aren't already deconstructions on superheroes, but, like, are there gonna be more
Speaker 1:superhero movies than you? There will be because, like, the only people who are who will make that kind of thing are people who have, you know, for it's not it's not the thing to do. Right? So making a western is not a surefire way to make money, and and working with horses is expensive and it's time consuming. Yeah.
Speaker 1:But, like, it just it made me think, like, maybe there should be more traditional westerns in the sense of, like okay. Think about a movie like Young Guns. Right? Young Guns is very much like, it's like a like, it's a revitalization of a traditional western tropes and stuff. It's not it's not like an am I saying this right?
Speaker 1:An Elegiate. Elegiac. Why am I having such a problem?
Speaker 2:There we go.
Speaker 1:Yeah. It's not like an elegiac look at the American West. It's not, trying to, like but it it it's not it's subverting some tropes a little bit. Right? It's updating some things.
Speaker 1:Yeah. Yeah. You know, it's like And
Speaker 2:it's like, what if it was the American west, but everybody had eighties hairdos?
Speaker 1:Yeah. And Lou Diamond Phillips has is plays a real character. He's not like a Yeah. He's not like a a comic relief or a sidekick or something like that. Yeah.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, there's things in it, but it's like it just occurs to me that, like, that, like, that's a problem if the only things that are made in a certain genre are, like, high culture or or or made, you know, made by somebody like Jane Campion, a great director, but, like, not I I don't think what you would call, like, a populist director.
Speaker 2:I I would say that in this era and, like, Sam Elliott's a great example of this. I mean, the reason he had that interview, where he said that stuff is because he was promoting his prestige or, you know, streaming fucking TV show or miniseries that's about that. So a lot of the there's a lot
Speaker 1:of There's western stuff out there.
Speaker 2:Western stuff on TV for sure. Okay. But, yeah, I mean,
Speaker 1:I think it's part
Speaker 2:of the natural cycle of, like, of of genre stuff like that anyways where I mean, the question's been around for fucking 200 years now or sorry, for 100 years now.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Like, they they I mean, they were around fucking from the start of film more or less.
Speaker 1:Yeah. Western movies. That's where that's where they
Speaker 2:got that camera working. Fucking close. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly.
Speaker 2:And and I think it's just part of the cycle. Now that, like, our parents and grandparents and, like, our great grandparents and their parents have, like, all see westerns, and have seen them, and it's something that they know. It's like the water, you know, like, it makes sense that there would be high minded reflections on them. And there were even, like, movies movies in the forties fifties that would could be considered high minded reflections on the genre. Yeah.
Speaker 2:I suppose.
Speaker 1:Sam Elliott. Yeah. That's fine.
Speaker 2:We're talking about Sam Elliott.
Speaker 1:When he shows up in the movie, I love it. I I like when he
Speaker 2:The point about the controversy is that is to me is that he said some stuff that might that could have been taken off. In my opinion, it was a little offensive, but it could have been worse. It wasn't like, you know, canceling type material. Mainly because he didn't really say much. He just was really vague.
Speaker 2:But he made a point to apologize to anybody he might have insulted
Speaker 1:at this point. People were calling movies because of shit, though. I wish more people would say this movie
Speaker 2:is because of shit.
Speaker 1:Like, honestly
Speaker 2:That movie is not a piece of shit. That movie I thought was was great. You wouldn't like it because it's boring, but,
Speaker 1:I like it because it's boring. That's the thing is, like, I have my own reasons. Like, I I'm not a Jane Campion dude because when I try to watch these movies, like, I would fall asleep, man. I'll straight up fall asleep.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Sleep is high up on the list. I'd put sleep above Jane Campion movies. Well, I don't know. I put them out equally because I experienced them the same way. Right?
Speaker 1:And and that's not like, I I I can appreciate that something is well made or appreciate the artistry, but also think it's, like, sleep. It's, like, super boring. You know? Yeah. Like, that's just my personal taste, though.
Speaker 1:Right? So I'm not saying what one I can't say one thing's better than another thing. Of course, I say that because while you and I are on the show, literally saying one thing
Speaker 2:That's our job. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's our it's our that's how we make Pod Bucks.
Speaker 1:Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Exactly. He you're you're right. I did interrupt you when you were saying that you that you love him whenever you see him. And I love when I ever whenever I see him in any
Speaker 1:case. Hear him? Do you think you gotta get that
Speaker 2:his voice?
Speaker 1:Gotta get that did?
Speaker 2:A rant. Joe Biden campaign in 2020? No. I Joe Biden campaign ad. He'd he vocalized, which is probably why Joe Biden won.
Speaker 2:Probably. Yeah.
Speaker 1:His voice carries a lot of weight. Like, it
Speaker 2:Oh, yeah.
Speaker 1:Like, because people hear his voice, and they think, like, oh, that's a he you know, that's the guy who's, like, who's, like, looking off into the middle distance at the, you know, at the at the at the wagon train coming through or something. You know? Or Yeah. You know? He and and he's old, and it's like, as he's gotten older, like, he didn't have that kind of that kind of gravitas on mission impossible.
Speaker 1:Right? He kinda aged into it. He got he Yeah. He he aged into, like, a real authority. I kinda His career
Speaker 2:arc has been, like, very slow and gradual upward trajectory. Like, he you know, I know even by the time when he was in when he was in Big Lebowski, I was like, oh, it's that character actor. You know? It's like that that was that was a big kind of a bigger thing for him. He had been he had a number of side, roles and stuff like that.
Speaker 2:He had been in
Speaker 1:He he had
Speaker 2:been in Roadhouse. You're right. He wasn't by then, he was well known. But Roadhouse, for example, he was like he that's the time where he was like, oh, he had been in mask as as a character. You know, I was like And
Speaker 1:he'd been a lot on TV and stuff. He'd been on TV a lot.
Speaker 2:It was it was a big deal. I think that he was in tombstone as Virgil Earp, which is like part of the reason I really love him. One of the many reasons I love him is because I love that movie, and he's great in it. Also notable is he played Thunderbolt Ross in one of the Hulk movies. Oh, yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah. And he class really good casting.
Speaker 1:He classes things up. Like, he's one of those people that he he classes up a production by being in it. Like, imagine you if you're watching particularly a western, but other like, it could be like a contemporary detective story, set in the American Southwest, and, and, they go and they talk to the the, you know, the the suspect there, you know, and the suspect is him, and you're like, oh, shit. Like, this I didn't realize this guy was in this movie. I didn't realize what I was into, you know.
Speaker 1:I saw a movie like that, or he I saw one where it was like a he was a military guy, and it worked, you know. He works in other settings. I'd kinda like wish he had done more science fiction and things like that. He did a golden compass, which is based on these books, these, His Dark Materials, and and the movie wasn't particularly good, but it was cool to see him. He plays a balloonist in it.
Speaker 1:It but it's like a a fantasy type movie. You know? It's like Right. Like a
Speaker 2:He's he's a bit of a one note guy regardless of of what I mean, a lot of times he's cast in the exact same role Yeah. Over and over again. I don't think he minds that that much.
Speaker 1:Crusty, but benevolent. You know, he don't he doesn't play the murderer. He doesn't usually play the guy that that that that's gonna, you know, he doesn't play the the villain from Dirty Harry or something like that. Mentor character, trustworthy father, that kind of thing. And you think, like Yeah.
Speaker 1:Tommy Lee Jones is probably trying to take his spot all the time. I bet, like, Tommy Lee Jones goes and, like, auditions for the role, but Samuel Elliott's there, and he's like, shit. I'm not gonna get it. You know? You think that happens?
Speaker 2:Yeah. Maybe. Yeah. I could I could see that. I mean, probably a little bit of both, I bet.
Speaker 2:Because it can go either way, I'm sure. Do are do you wanna rank them? I've Yeah. I'm ready to
Speaker 1:rank them. All the stuff there's You know, I do. I'm easy ranking actual human beings.
Speaker 2:I know. I know. But you you have to do it, so that's why you get out of your comfort space.
Speaker 1:I know, but I don't like it, especially because, like, what if he finds out? And he's like, oh, you put me too high or too low, or
Speaker 2:you said this wrong? Over podcast right now, so I don't think he'll be listening to this one.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So we have other actors on here, and I think those are fair comparisons. Right?
Speaker 2:Yeah. Of course.
Speaker 1:You got someone like Bill Paxton. Right? Bill Paxton is he pops more, and he's a he's he stars in things more. And, like, he I feel like he's somebody who, when I see him in movies, it's more I like it more than when I see Sam Elliott movies. Now
Speaker 2:Where's Bill Paxton's ranked at number
Speaker 1:59? 59. Yeah. Like, Bill Paxton got turned into, like, a weird creature and and weird science. He, he gets killed in aliens.
Speaker 1:You know? He has some, like, memorable scenes.
Speaker 2:Yeah. He plays he plays that that sleazebag in, True Lies.
Speaker 1:Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Now, again, we have number at number 91, we have Shaquille O'Neal. Shaquille O'Neal has won multiple NBA championships.
Speaker 1:You know. Like, this guy has won the MVP. This guy is like a a a renowned figure. Right? So I kinda think that maybe something like Shaquille O'Neal.
Speaker 2:Maybe something like that. I mean, I I I do agree that, he Bill Paxton, I think, deserves to go above, Sam Elliott,
Speaker 1:for a
Speaker 2:lot of reasons, but mainly just mainly for the breadth of his different performances.
Speaker 1:Oh, yeah. Like, he he's played different types. Like, whereas, Samuel Elliott basically plays the same kind of type, which is Yeah.
Speaker 2:But, I mean, but Samuel Elliott's got the I mean, that type is great, and that fucking voice is, like, undeniably, like, one of the best things to come out of Hollywood.
Speaker 1:You spread it on you spread it on bread, and it's better than peanut butter.
Speaker 2:Exactly. Another person between like, I wanna put him above Shaquille. Shaquille just doesn't excite me
Speaker 1:that way. About Shaquille O'Neal, you never watch if you ever look at a highlight reel of Shaquille O'Neal, what's fascinating about him is Shaquille O'Neal is giant. Like, when you watch him now and he's retired and he's talking to the you know how they have those shows where he and the other ex basketball players, they're talking about the game and joking around with each other. He's like a foot taller than Charles Barkley. Charles Barkley is enormous.
Speaker 1:Like, if you saw Charles Barkley on the street, you'd be like, what the hell? This guy's big. He's, like, he's much bigger than Charles Barkley. Right? But then when you watch him when he would play, how fast he was, like, he could cut any and and you think, like, how can somebody this big move this fast?
Speaker 1:It's it's, like, it's really incredible. Honestly, it's like it's like because he was in your in the in the world's life for so long, they kind of forgot what a what, like, a a miraculous physically per person this is physically. Right? The same way Right.
Speaker 2:And the
Speaker 1:same way that Sam Elliott's mustache, I would say Shaquille O'Neal's quickness is very similar. You forget Sam Elliott's mustache. You forget how powerful it is until you see it. And you're like, oh, man. It's right there.
Speaker 1:What if he shaved
Speaker 2:it for real? I guess, like, I guess I guess Shaquille's, like, size and height is sort of the natural thing, like, that he that he that he has similar in a way to Sam Elliott's voice.
Speaker 1:Or maybe his voice. Yeah.
Speaker 2:But then but then the the mustache is like the speed. Like, Sam Elliott's mustache is to just like Shaq's speed.
Speaker 1:Yeah. Shaq is like you know, he is cut to the pinnacle of his profession multiple times. He's won the MVP award, which they only give out to 1 player every year. Right? And he's won that multiple times.
Speaker 1:So Yeah. Like, he is the absolute top in his profession. Now I understand you're not a Tennessee. Tombstone's your favorite movie. You don't watch the NBA finals from, 2001.
Speaker 2:It's one of my favorite movies. Yeah.
Speaker 1:But you're not you don't you don't say, hey. I'm gonna watch the finals where, you know, where No. Where the Shaq beat the No. Beat the Indiana Indiana Pacers. I get that, man.
Speaker 1:But I'm saying, like, consider Shaq here. I think Shaq is
Speaker 2:at that comparison. I'll concede to you on this that it's it's comparable. Yeah. Just because of my inexperience or or like the fact that I know don't care about baseball that or basketball rather Alright. Okay.
Speaker 2:That much.
Speaker 1:So so then let's think about this then. Now we have shirtless midwearing elaborate angel wings, gold lame shorts, and furry cha cha heels. That's an idea. What if Sam Elliott
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Young Sam Elliott could have been one of those dudes? Like, this was a real he's a real Yeah. He like, this guy I
Speaker 2:mean, or old or old Sam Elliott, like Honestly? I mean, they do belong together. So would you go above or below that?
Speaker 1:Be sandwiched in between Shaquille O'Neal and the shirtless men wearing elaborate angel wings, gold lame shorts, and free cha cha heels. We should have an acronym for that. Because I feel like we say it. I feel like is it just because it's such a long one that we say it have to say it all the time?
Speaker 2:No. I think, well, because it's fun to say, and everybody wants w
Speaker 1:e a w g l s.
Speaker 2:Yeah. They wouldn't nobody would wanna hear that. Like, people wanna people wanna hear I could, like, I can I can almost hear, like, the listener right now jumping up and cheering when we and, like, saying it along with us when we say shirtless man wearing elaborate angel wings, gold lame shorts, and furry cha cha heels? Honestly, I was chanting it
Speaker 1:right now. I imagine it, I'm thinking, I don't imagine the heels. I forget about that part. When I'm saying it, I'm like, oh, yeah. Also, they got heels on, you know.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Yeah. I'm mainly thinking about the shorts. So, yeah.
Speaker 1:Right above
Speaker 2:that, you think?
Speaker 1:Yeah. Okay. Yeah. I think between I think he should be between them and Shaq.
Speaker 2:Okay. Alright. So, Sam Elliott goes in at, 92, moving to number 93. Shirtless men wearing elaborate angel wings, gold lame shirts, and furry Cha Cha heels.
Speaker 1:Gold lame shorts.
Speaker 2:I said gold lame shorts, didn't I?
Speaker 1:Hey. You read the tape. Listen to the tape, and and you'll find it didn't. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Did it say shirts?
Speaker 1:You know what? I should When I say
Speaker 2:when I say skorts, I say jorts, what did I say?
Speaker 1:I shoulda let it go. Go eliminate George to be tight. Okay. But they should be tight as well.
Speaker 2:So before we close out, I wanna let listeners know that, it's getting close to the last chance to vote for what item we're going to re rank in an upcoming episode. Polls are about to close, And I'm gonna go through the last few things that are have been nominated. One of them is Harry Styles. I think, Harry Styles was originally submitted by Emily Cain. We ranked him back in 71, and we ranked him pretty dang high on the list.
Speaker 2:He is currently at where is he?
Speaker 1:I couldn't tell you one song by Harry Styles.
Speaker 2:At 23. Yeah. The Harry Styles shuffle.
Speaker 1:Yeah. You can name
Speaker 2:one movie he was in. You can name 2 movies he was in.
Speaker 1:I I can't, man.
Speaker 2:Yes, you can. Come on.
Speaker 1:Was he in Tenet or something? I don't know.
Speaker 2:No. He was in, Dunkirk, and he was also in Oh, yeah. Spoiler alert.
Speaker 1:Oh, I saw Dunkirk. Yeah. Okay.
Speaker 2:So he's ranked he's currently at number 23. Dirty Dancing and Beth, your wife, Phil, both think that he's ranked too high, and we should re rank him.
Speaker 1:I think so.
Speaker 2:If you agree, listener, go to every damn thing dot net. Click on the vote here button and
Speaker 1:I think all the human beings are too high. I think that that the top human being should be somewhere, like, around 20 in in the twenties, like, you know, below below air and molasses and, the pop Popeye's and whatnot.
Speaker 2:Another human being in the in the top 2 top 20 is, Britney Spears. She's at number 15. Oh, I said too high. She was originally submitted by, Dan r. We ranked her in episode 84.
Speaker 1:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:Phil, you nominated her for re ranking. You think she's too high?
Speaker 1:Yeah. I think so. No disrespect. I just think that, like, all a lot of people are too high, and what happens is they serve as anchors for one another. So then the next time somebody comes in, then our eyes are then somebody says, oh, I don't like Britney Spears as much as I like this person, so this person has to be above Britney Spears on the list, and then we end up putting all more people too high.
Speaker 1:And I think that human beings are too high. Human beings are flawed, man. Like, even the best of us.
Speaker 2:I know.
Speaker 1:You ever The
Speaker 2:human beings are great. We wouldn't be here if it wasn't for human beings. I mean, this list this list wouldn't we wouldn't be well, the list would exist
Speaker 1:so we wouldn't be able to
Speaker 2:tell it to other human beings. What's that?
Speaker 1:You ever smell human feces? That comes from human beings, and it's not doesn't smell good ever.
Speaker 2:I've never smelled that.
Speaker 1:Well, let me give you a hint about what it smells like. It doesn't smell good. You ever heard somebody say that smells like shit? They're not talking about dog shit.
Speaker 2:Listener, if you agree with Phil and you think the human beings are ranked too high, go in there, vote for Britney Spears, or vote for Harry Styles to be reranked. If you don't agree with him, go to every damn thing dot net. Click on the vote here, link, and and vote for something else to be reranked.
Speaker 1:And you can vote for multiple things, like, you could vote more
Speaker 2:For example, like, you could you could go in there, and you could vote for alternative milks.
Speaker 1:Oh, yeah.
Speaker 2:Which is at number 107, which was originally submitted by Thad. We ranked it in episode 84, but Melissa b thinks we should re rank it. There's one at thinks it's too low.
Speaker 1:There's one at the store called Mauk, which is like from a Simpsons joke, and I thought that's really funny that yeah. It's Mauck. It's like almonds or whatever. I don't peanuts or something.
Speaker 2:So You could also go in there and, vote for cochlear implants.
Speaker 1:You could vote for everything but cochlear implants too. Like, you can vote for like, let's say there's 10 things. You can vote for 9 of them at once. Oh. And Yeah.
Speaker 2:I mean, that's that's
Speaker 1:kinda yummy. Strategic.
Speaker 2:Yeah. I suggest you vote for 3. Cochlear implants is currently 142. It was originally submitted by Kaylene. We ranked it not long ago, episode 88.
Speaker 2:Donovan thinks it's ranked way too low. I kinda think it's too low too. But, Phil thinks that they're bad. And some other people think that they're bad. They probably don't listen to this episode.
Speaker 2:It's a little
Speaker 1:more nuanced, man, than that.
Speaker 2:But might read a a transcription of this if you ever get those made. That's a good call. And at number, currently at number, what, 272, we have plastic straws. Those are submitted by Kai. We ranked them in episode 88.
Speaker 2:And Stephane, who we, read, some comments from today
Speaker 1:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:Thinks that plastic straws are ranked too low. He thinks that they're much better than 272.
Speaker 1:You know what I respect about plastic straws? At McDonald's Corporation. If you ever knew McDonald's. At McDonald's, if you get a soda, they I think because they wanna get you out of there faster, you know, like the people they want they want more what do you call it when you're trying to get people through? They want more Turnover?
Speaker 1:Higher turnover. The straws are wider gauge. The straws are, like, twice as wide as a regular straw. So it it allows you to drink if you if you're so inclined, you can slam a soda much faster from because it this is why it's
Speaker 2:not soda and maybe go buy another one too.
Speaker 1:Yeah. Yeah. Or just get you gotta get more glucose in you, man. I know how it is.
Speaker 2:You gotta.
Speaker 1:Yeah. Yeah. By the way, when we made peanut butter, did that include when there's a spiral of jelly mixed in with it? You know what I'm talking about?
Speaker 2:That includes the this only only the peanut butter part of it. Okay. Okay. So, like, we we ranked peanut butter ice cream, which is on the list somewhere, but, that doesn't include all peanut butter ice cream. Just the part with just the peanut butter part of the peanut butter
Speaker 1:ice cream. Okay. Good. I was just thinking about it. I know it's called something, and it's like it it looks kinda cool at the store, but I've never bought it because I thought it was the dumbest shit I ever saw in my life, but kind of interesting still, nonetheless.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Let's see. So this is the part of the show where we say goodbye. It's the tearful goodbye, and I'm sad to see it go. Jake, you know that I always like recording these with you. I like recording them with guests too, but I always like doing this with you.
Speaker 1:Thank you
Speaker 2:for listening
Speaker 1:to every damn thing. We hope that you enjoyed it. Oh, and also I should hasten to add that the for the listener, I'm also glad that we get to say this, to have
Speaker 2:the listener Of course.
Speaker 1:To join us, you know, and not be able to interrupt us. That's the best part.
Speaker 2:Yeah. I'm gonna interrupt you. Listener, as a reminder, I've only said it once or twice, but if you do wanna vote on which item we're gonna re rank, go to every damn thing dot net. There's a link there.
Speaker 1:And you can also you can also email us at list@everydamnthing.net if you wanna suggest a new topic or, you know, see a show notes or, or the updated list as it is currently. You can find us on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook, and you can suggest topics there. And you can subscribe or follow wherever you listen. Our theme is by jpuget.
Speaker 2:Yes. And if you want to tell Phil that he's wrong about his peanuts theory or that he's right, you can do it at all those places Phil just listed. If you enjoyed the show, please rate and review it. Send us a screenshot of a 5 star review, and we'll bump a submission of your choice to the front of the queue. Also, if you want to support the show, we recommend it to Sam Elliott.
Speaker 2:He probably won't listen to it because I don't I think he doesn't like podcasts. So if he says I'm not gonna listen to that fucking piece of shit podcast, then recommend it to a friend instead or all your friends or whatever.
Speaker 1:Yeah. And, as always, it ranks for everything.