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When one of us suffers, we all suffer. So says our guest, Rachael Jaye. Jaye is a certified Connection Coach and today she’s going to talk to us about her work helping to rehabilitate intimacy lost in separation.
Show Notes
When one of us suffers, we all suffer. So says our guest, Rachael Jaye. Jaye is a certified Connection Coach and today she’s going to talk to us about her work helping to rehabilitate intimacy lost in separation.
So, exactly what is a Connection Coach, and why might you need one? When we move through divorce, when trust is tested or broken, we might experience a loss of our ability exist in the space of connection or intimacy with other people. And, because relationships tend to break down slowly, over years, it’s not often clear what connection skills have eroded along the way. This week on the show we talk all about this, why relationships break down, how our ability to communicate authentically is dependent on our ability to connect intimately.
About Rachael Jaye
Rachael Jaye is The Connection Coach. Her belief is that when one of us suffers, we all suffer; yet healing is available when we experience genuine connection with others. As a certified Cuddlist and Connection Specialist, she’s a pro at creating a safe space in her connection sessions, and also offers coaching around cultivating authentic relationships. While her techniques apply universally, Rachael specializes in supporting men’s mental and emotional health specifically as it pertains to their relationships. She’s developed support programs designed to meet a client where they’re at, whether simply looking for someone to listen to and accept them, or desiring tools to reignite the intimacy in their relationship. She loves theatre, rooting for her Niners, and engaging intentionally with strangers — but not like a creeper!
Links & Notes
-Find Rachael at HKR Coaching
-Follow Rachael Jaye on LinkedIn
-Follow Rachael Jaye on Instagram
-Follow Rachael Jaye on Facebook
- (00:00) - Welcome to How to Split a Toaster
- (00:29) - Rachael Jaye, Connection Coach
- (01:32) - The Loneliest Population
- (04:28) - Alone vs. Lonely
- (05:55) - Identifying Loneliness in Your Spouse
- (08:50) - Sidebar: What is a Cuddlist?
- (11:21) - Boundaries and Roles
- (13:37) - Techniques for Connection
- (17:47) - Work Path With Married vs. Divorced Men
- (19:16) - Dos and Don'ts on Post-Divorce Dating
- (25:53) - Help for Women
- (27:22) - Market for Connection Coaching
- (28:40) - Connecting With Rachael & Wrapping Up
Creators and Guests
Host
Host
What is How to Split a Toaster: A Divorce Podcast About Saving Your Relationships?
Seth Nelson is a Tampa based family lawyer known for devising creative solutions to difficult problems. In How to Split a Toaster, Nelson and co-host Pete Wright take on the challenge of divorce with a central objective — saving your most important relationships with your family, your former spouse, and yourself.
Speaker 1:
Welcome to How to Split a Toaster, a divorce podcast about saving your relationships from TruStory FM. Today, we're heading to the cuddle zone.
Seth Nelson:
Welcome to the show, everyone. I am Seth Nelson, and I'm here with my good friend, Pete Wright, as always. Our guest today is Rachael Jaye, connection coach, and she's here to talk to us about what it means to connect and reconnect after the trauma of divorce. Rachael, welcome to The Toaster.
Rachael Jaye:
Hi, thank you so much. I'm so excited to be on with you guys.
Pete Wright:
Oh, I'm very excited to have you talk to us today. Your work exists in such a unique space that I feel like is really important, and we talk about the cold, hard law so much on this show and we check so many jurisdictions...
Seth Nelson:
Don't go back to my jurisdictions and the cold, hard law.
Rachael Jaye:
He's just slipping it right on in there. [crosstalk 00:01:19].
Seth Nelson:
You remember? I'm just a bill? Like it went up to Capitol Hill. It was so cute, and that's the cold, hard law you're referring to my friend, Pete.
Pete Wright:
I'll allow it. You're right. [crosstalk 00:01:32] I want to hear what it is that you do. Tell us a little bit about where you exist in helping folks connect. What does that mean?
Rachael Jaye:
So currently, what I'm doing is I am working one-on-one virtually with primarily men and even more primarily men who are married and have children and are experiencing profound loneliness in their relationships. It's a population that we don't often think about as being lonely because we think, "Oh, they're married. They have kids. They have a family," so why would these men be lonelier than, say, single men? But of people who report feelings of loneliness, that's actually the largest population is married men with kids. So that is where I really sort of dial in and want to support that demographic so that they can start to A, feel less lonely in a way that is safe and healthy and not potentially dangerous for the impact of the family, but also provide tools so that they can, if they want to and feel like they're still a possibility in their relationship, learn and practice tools to be able to re-ignite that intimacy if it's still there to be reignited.
Pete Wright:
That surprises me. Seth, does that surprise you? It should, probably, shouldn't.
Rachael Jaye:
It doesn't because everyone, as we've talked about, Pete, people think about divorce for years before they do it.
Pete Wright:
Yeah.
Seth Nelson:
It might be finances. It might be we're not connected anymore. Our lives took different directions, but those are all, I think, catchphrases where it's very difficult for a guy to simply say, "I'm lonely." I think that would be hard for someone to say. They might not even identify it as loneliness. Instead, they're going to say all of these other things that is wrong in their life, "I'm too busy at work. I don't have time for this. We don't have date night anymore," whatever the case may be, and Rachael, correct me if I'm wrong on any of this...
Rachael Jaye:
No, you're right on the money.
Seth Nelson:
... and all that translate to, "I'm lonely," and then relationship doesn't last, they get a divorce, they're on the dating apps and then, hey. They go out on a date and they're having a good time. Someone's interested in them and how their day was and now, they're not lonely.
Pete Wright:
It's interesting. One of our top downloaded episodes is back in season one and the title is just, "And now, you're alone," and I feel like I suddenly get why that title is provocative and why it gets clicked on because that encapsulates a feeling that you may be living and have been living for quite some time.
Rachael Jaye:
Well, and there's a difference between alone and being lonely too. Right?
Pete Wright:
Yeah.
Rachael Jaye:
So someone can be lonely in their relationship for a really long time and as Seth said, use all of these other sorts of masks as to why the relationship isn't working out. Part of that, a large part of that is because of gender role conditioning, which is something I talk about a lot, that men don't feel encouraged or safe to say, "I'm lonely. I'm depressed. I need support. I need a hug," so we mask it with these other symptoms of something that's wrong. So someone can be lonely in the relationship, but then that translates differently once they're out of the relationship and actually alone, and someone might actually feel less lonely being alone if that makes sense.
Seth Nelson:
Part of that also might be an expectation. If you are living alone, you're not expecting to have clever conversation over dinner with your spouse that night. So because you're not expecting it, you don't miss it.
Pete Wright:
You don't miss it.
Seth Nelson:
Right?
Rachael Jaye:
Yeah. Yeah.
Pete Wright:
I don't know. Do you remember that feeling, Seth, in your marriage, that feeling of everybody goes through ups and downs of just feeling like I'm all alone in this, whatever it is that I'm doing right now, I don't feel like I have a partner, even if I do?
Seth Nelson:
I think that a common feeling not just to feel alone, but I think the other way to say it is not connected. I'm not as connected to who I'm with. Okay? I hear a lot of people talk about that. We have our ups and our downs. All relationships go through them. These are just kind of these catch phrases that people say. Rachael, here's my real question for you because we like to really focus on saving your relationships, the one with yourself, the one with your kids, the one with your spouse, if possible, but what are the identifiers? What are the key markers that our listeners should be watching out for because they might say, "Hey. Yeah, that makes sense to me?" But if it's your spouse, how can you identify it in your spouse to say, "Hey, maybe they're lonely and they're not articulating it," or, "I see it now that Rachael told me," what should we be looking for to figure out how to know if we even have a problem like this?
Rachael Jaye:
That's an awesome question. Thank you for asking that. I'm going to speak to what we should watch out for as women in our male partners because that's who I primarily work with. But men who start to shut down in the relationship and aren't showing up as fully in the partnership, with the kids, maybe they're working more hours because part of it is this, "I'm the provider. That's the role that I fill now because I'm not feeling connected in my relationship. So that's my role," so maybe they're spending more time at work or more time doing things with other friends or just in general, not asking for what they want and need from partner anymore, not asking for things as simple as a hug because that's something that happens a lot after a long breakdown of the relationship where there can be sort of accusations about ulterior motives.
If the husband comes in and is like, "Hey, can I get a hug? I had a really hard day," confirm for me if this is true for you or not, or what you've seen, but a lot of times these men that come in and ask for something that simple might be met with side eye and okay, but we're not having sex. I'm not in the mood. Or I have too many things to do.
Pete Wright:
That is, I think, a common trope is that any form of intimate outreach from men is sexual.
Rachael Jaye:
Yes.
Pete Wright:
And as a man, that's only mostly true.
Rachael Jaye:
But I can tell you as a Cuddlist it's not always true.
Pete Wright:
Right. It's not always true. Okay. Sidebar, what is a Cuddlist?
Rachael Jaye:
Sidebar. Oh my gosh. I have friends that know... One of my closest friends was a DA and I have friends of hers who were in the law community. It's just kind of our running jokes. I'm going to have to make sure they listen to this because we shout out, "sidebar," and, "erroneous," pretty often to each other. [crosstalk 00:09:11]
Pete Wright:
Seth loves that. [crosstalk 00:09:12].
Seth Nelson:
I'm like a squirrel. Where do I go? [crosstalk 00:09:16].
Rachael Jaye:
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I'll have to make sure I sent this to them.
Pete Wright:
Right.
Rachael Jaye:
Sorry. I totally interrupted you. [crosstalk 00:09:23]
Pete Wright:
No. The question was just, what is a Cuddlist?
Rachael Jaye:
Oh, yes. Okay. So a lot of people are totally unfamiliar with this, but it's been growing a lot. Cuddlist as a company has been in existence for the last about five years, I believe, maybe almost six. So a cuddle list in layman's terms is a professional cuddler, but I have sort of renamed it for myself as a platonic touch therapist because it is so much more than cuddling someone. It's consent education. It's really taking the rejection out of a no response, which is something that we have been conditioned throughout time, that if somebody tells you, "No," that's a rejection and we take it personally and then that leads to lots of other problems.
Pete Wright:
Sure.
Rachael Jaye:
So it's helping to empower people to advocate for themselves and ask for what it is that they want and need from someone, whether their partner or anyone else, but getting that verbal consent, which is particularly important in a Me Too climate that we have been in because there's so much gray area that's come out of that. It's hugely about consent education and empowering people to advocate for themselves and also in a way that they're not only asking for what they want, but they're also feeling empowered to say, "No," to the things that they don't want. So it's a lot more than simply professional cuddling. So that's why I like to expand on it.
Seth Nelson:
So you're helping people communicate in a healthy way-
Rachael Jaye:
Yeah.
Seth Nelson:
... about what they're asking for from their partner and what they're not asking for. Usually, a no might not have anything to do with the person that is being told no. It's more about the person that's saying no.
Rachael Jaye:
Correct. Yeah. It's about honoring your boundaries and somebody else's. If you hear it no or if you say a no, it's because your respecting your boundaries or they are.
Seth Nelson:
So I'm going to give you an example with my girlfriend on a conversation we just recently had and hope this doesn't get me in trouble.
Pete Wright:
These are my favorite.
Seth Nelson:
I know. Pete knows my girlfriend. He can't wait for these.
Pete Wright:
Oh my gosh. Talk about catnip for me. Wow.
Seth Nelson:
So we're having this conversation and she's telling me about this problem that she's having. I immediately go into the typical male response in trying to the problem, "Did you try this? What about that? Did you hear that the right way? Well, did you think of it this way?" I'm just going, going, going, going and literally she stops me and says, "I'm not asking you to fix the problem." And I said, "What are you asking me to do?" She said, "Listen." And I said, "Wait a minute. All I need to do is have a drink and listen to what you're saying." And she's like, "Yeah." I'm like, "That's a lot easier than fixing this fucking problem." [crosstalk 00:12:27] Then we had a wonderful conversation and I listened, I was an active listener. If I didn't understand something, I would ask a question. That conversation, it actually brought us closer together because we were connected on that in not me trying to be the man and be the problem solver. Is that kind of what we're talking about here?
Rachael Jaye:
Oh, yeah. That, I would say, goes more in line with what I'm doing now with the coaching, but it all comes down to everybody at their core wants to feel seen, and that doesn't necessarily mean we want a response of any kind, whether it's trying to fix the problem, which we're often prone to want to do, or even just like, "I'm so sorry." Anything that we feel like helps alleviate some of that pain that's going on, it's about just being there and seeing somebody going through something and allowing them to share openly, authentically and vulnerably so that they feel witnessed.
Seth Nelson:
And being vulnerable is powerful.
Rachael Jaye:
Oh my God. Yeah. That's the core of connection right there.
Pete Wright:
How do you engage the men that you work with to have these kinds of conversations? Because I imagine if they're struggling with these things, that hearing a lot of the words you're saying right now might sound a lot like a Peanuts cartoon. Yeah.
Rachael Jaye:
Yeah. Got you. Yeah. With a lot of warmup in a way, for lack of a better way of saying it, because men aren't encouraged to seek support and be vulnerable and know that it's safe to express these things and open up. So with men in particular, there's a lot of sort of slowly building that trust and I think that how I've been able to successfully do that thus far has been through my social media and the content that I put there and encouraging and really showing people that this is a safe space, and also sharing some of my own personal struggles with my mental and emotional wellness and realizing that you can't hold this stuff in. You're not being a burden to somebody else. You really do need just an outlet sometimes and that can alleviate a lot of that stress.
Seth Nelson:
Some of that outlet might just be simply, where are you emotionally in that very moment when you're having a conversation? And by way of example, we'll have meetings at the office, and I'm not talking a quick two or three minute meeting, but if we're having a meeting that's going to last 10, 15, 20 minutes where serious decisions need to be made, we'll go around the table at the office and say, "Red light, green light, yellow light." It sounds a little silly, but where are you right now in this meeting?
Some people are like, "Green light. I'm for it. I'm really excited about it. This is kind of my pet project," and someone else might say, "I am barely here. I was up last night. My kid was sick. So I'm kind of dragging today, but I'm going to try to get refocused and be here." But that way, when that person that's not engaged, we realize, hey, maybe they're just having a bad day. It has nothing to do with the content. It has nothing to do with us or what we're doing. It's how they're just even showing up. We all have good days. We all have bad days. So being just able to identify that and say it kind of puts everybody at ease like, "Okay. We know where we are. Let's move forward."
Rachael Jaye:
Great. Yeah. No, seriously because- [crosstalk 00:16:15].
Seth Nelson:
Being a nice Jewish boy. That's what I'm going to go into. [crosstalk 00:16:19].
Rachael Jaye:
... nice Jewish boy. My mom would be so happy. You see, I've got the hands going. Yeah. No, that's so beautiful as a practice to do that, especially in work situations. That's why what I'm doing in sharing these techniques for connection are universal. So taking those pieces and applying it to your workspace and checking in with everybody and seeing how everybody's doing, where they're at builds empathy. For one, it allows everyone to feel safe, to be a little bit vulnerable at the start of that meeting and for you to be able to set sort of a good example by saying, "Look, I had a rough night last night. I was up all night with the kids. How's everybody else doing?" Then other people start to feel safer in sharing kind of, "Yeah. I'm a little bit of a yellow light too, because X, Y, Z." So that's one part of it.
Then the other part is building that empathy because it is about understanding, look, I'm not the only one going through shit. Other people have other shit that I didn't even think about because I'm so stuck on my own. So it's raising that empathy and awareness so that when things do go wrong throughout the meeting, throughout the day, throughout the trial, whatever the case may be, we're able to take a step back instead of react and have a better understanding of what's going on and be able to respond in a way that really allows for a deeper connection to take place from there.
Pete Wright:
I'm really interested in this idea of how you approach or, or maybe if you approach men differently when they are post-divorce, when they're looking to reestablish or rehabilitate their intimacy... What's the word I'm looking for? Rehabilitate their intimacy as they go forward and try to get back out there and get into new relationships. Is there a different sort of path you take or what do you notice that's unique about men in that situation?
Rachael Jaye:
The process isn't really any different. What's different is that men in that sort of transitional place and are ready to maybe move forward and start putting themselves back out there again, now they have an opportunity to use these techniques as a blank slate as they're meeting people. So it's the same techniques. It's the same process with starting with really being a safe space and allowing someone to build their confidence in being seen and accepted without judgment or shame or criticism. So building that confidence back up, particularly after going through a divorce, which can totally shut someone down and then building on that with the same technique, same process. But now, you're kind of setting yourself up for success in a new relationship because you'll be able to come into it from a really authentic place and hopefully be matched with that.
Pete Wright:
Sure. Be better in all relationships, not just the one with your current partner. [crosstalk 00:19:17]
Seth Nelson:
So on that point, and I think first, I'm going to ask two questions. One is, do you have some do's and don'ts on post-divorce dating? And do they apply equally to men and women? So you're divorced, you're ready to get back out there, your friends saying, "We're going to set you up," you're on that date. What should you not talk about?
Rachael Jaye:
Well, for one, I would say don't go on the date until you really feel that you've gone through some sort of period of healing from the separation because regardless of whether it was mutual or instigated by you or not, there's healing that needs to happen because it's like a death in a way. It's a huge piece of you that's not there anymore. So there's healing that needs to happen before you're even really going to be ready. So that would be the first do/don't. Do heal. Don't rush it.
Seth Nelson:
Okay. So we've done that. We're on the date.
Rachael Jaye:
Yeah. There are some pretty standard sorts of dating rules. John Gray talks about a lot in terms of you do want to put your best foot forward initially and allow that vulnerability to kind of trickle out over time as that trust builds in the relationship. So it's really sort of a balance between being authentic and being too vulnerable too soon. So an example of making sure that you're really being authentic when you're starting out on this dating journey would be know what's important to you and know what your values are and what you're looking for, and be clear on that and communicate that clearly. So that there's no question down the road about, "Oh, well, I thought you were looking for a relationship." "No, I wasn't. Sorry I gave you that impression," or, "Oh, in the beginning, you used to love to go get mani-pedis with me, what happened?" And it's like, "Yeah. No, I was only doing that because I wanted to impress you and seem like I was the guy for you."
Seth Nelson:
That's what I do to impress women, Pete. [crosstalk 00:21:25] I'm letting you know right now. [crosstalk 00:21:27]
Pete Wright:
I could see that 100%. I actually am accused of this all the time because I used to go grocery shopping with my wife before we were married and then we got married and I'm like, "I'm totally done with the grocery store." The grocery store is an active antagonist in my life. So we traded though. Now, I do all the laundry.
Rachael Jaye:
Awesome.
Pete Wright:
It's the same thing for lunch. So we trade. But I feel like that's part of the issue is finding where those gaps are and not coming off like a jerk in the process.
Rachael Jaye:
Yeah. All relationships take compromise. Compromise is a separate thing, but it's about showing up as you are and owning who you are so that there doesn't tend to become this disconnect later on where it's you used to love this, but now you don't love this. That's when trust starts to really break down is because we didn't show up being totally authentic from the get-go.
Pete Wright:
Yeah.
Seth Nelson:
So what about talking about your divorce? That's got to be a big, no, right?
Pete Wright:
So glad you brought that up. Yeah. When do you start bringing that up, if ever?
Rachael Jaye:
It depends on what it is you're trying to share. I don't think that there's anything wrong with saying, "I am divorced, or, "I am going through a divorce," especially if you're not actually legally divorced yet and just separated. Definitely be clear about that upfront, but you don't need to go into details or all of the trauma or all of the stories until well into the relationship. So I say do not go into that at the beginning.
Pete Wright:
It's part of your identity. If you're truly striving to be authentic, then kind of that has to come up. This is who you are at this point, before you're making any new commitment, right?
Seth Nelson:
I think it comes up. Right, Pete?
Pete Wright:
Yeah.
Seth Nelson:
You can certainly say, "Well, do you have any kids," or whatever the case may be and say, "Yeah..." I would say, "I was previously married," because I'm very intentional with my words and I think even divorce has a negative connotation, but the other thing that I find interesting, and friends of mine ask me this like, "Seth, I'm out on a date and the first thing she asked me was about my divorce. What do I say to that?" And I just gave a suggestion. I would say, "Why did we just invite my former spouse into our date? We're having such a lovely time."
Rachael Jaye:
Yeah.
Pete Wright:
Yeah. Right.
Seth Nelson:
Why are we inviting them in here?
Rachael Jaye:
I love that.
Seth Nelson:
Right? "I'm happy to discuss it down the road, but we had some good times. We had some bad, we drifted apart. But I'm really focused on just having a great time with you tonight,"
Pete Wright:
Yeah.
Rachael Jaye:
I love that. I love that.
Pete Wright:
"I learned a lot, and now I'm right here."
Seth Nelson:
Yeah, exactly.
Rachael Jaye:
Yeah. Snaps. Snaps to you guys. I love that. [crosstalk 00:24:12].
Seth Nelson:
How long have you been parried, Pete?
Pete Wright:
We're pretty sensitive dudes here. Yeah. No, that's all right. We're doing okay.
Rachael Jaye:
No, that's awesome. The other thing that I would add to that too, is as much as you feel comfortable to say because that would be secondary. If I would say if your friend still continues to push and say, "Yeah, but she's really wanting to know and she's digging," say as much as you feel comfortable sharing because that's where the boundaries piece comes into it. Don't share more than what you feel comfortable sharing, even if you're being pushed. Do you. Honor your own boundaries and if you're not comfortable digging into all of that at this point in the relationship, then say, "The highlights are this. But again, I learned a lot and I'm happy to be here with you and that's something that I'm not trying to hide anything. I just don't feel comfortable going into the depths of that at this stage."
Seth Nelson:
The other thing I always told a buddy was I said, "Be careful on what you say and listen to what they say about their past relationship." He's like, "What are you talking about?" And I'm like, if you start saying, "Well, my former spouse..." or you might say, "My ex would always say this about me..." you're basically telling that date exactly how someone perceives you and they might say, "I saw some red flags there." Right?
Rachael Jaye:
Yeah.
Seth Nelson:
So you should be focused more on where you are, not what other people were saying about you.
Rachael Jaye:
Yeah, absolutely. You don't want to bash your ex either. That never goes over well.
Pete Wright:
Yeah. So where do you stand on doing... I know you work mostly with men, but where do you see a role for this for women in and around the rehabilitative sort of divorce process?
Rachael Jaye:
If there is an interest and a need for it, doing potential support groups sort of thing for women mainly because women already have a lot of resources for support in going through stuff, but if they specifically want coaching or something of that nature around those techniques, I would be totally down to do something like that if there was an interest, but for now, I want to focus on the men.
Seth Nelson:
That's just so interesting to me that just... Pete and I, we're always pretty intentional about, "Hey, does this apply to both? We don't want to be seen as stereotyping people."
Pete Wright:
And we don't want to have too many gendered conversations. [crosstalk 00:26:48]. Yeah.
Seth Nelson:
But we are wired differently and women collaborate more than men. That's really what we're talking about. There's a lot of support out there. Just go in the podcast world dealing with divorce. There's a lot out there dealing solely with women working to help women and they're doing amazing work. We've had some of those podcasters as guest on the show and there's just not as much content out there for guys. It's more like, "Oh, go grab a beer with your buddy."
Pete Wright:
Yeah.
Rachael Jaye:
Yeah. Yeah.
Pete Wright:
I also wonder, I guess this is a question that is, how busy are you? But more broadly than your business, I believe in my heart of hearts, there is a market for this. I think that the stereotype is that men don't want this and I don't believe that's true. I don't know. Am I lying?
Rachael Jaye:
No, I agree with you totally. It's just a little bit harder to sort of break into because there is that hesitancy and that wall as far as feeling safe to actually talk to somebody because it's so stigmatized. As it is, mental health and seeking support, it's less stigmatized than it was, but for men, it still is. Especially with male friends, it's this whole thing about vulnerability equals weakness because it literally has equaled death since the beginning of time to show any sort of vulnerability, whether it's fighting off the saber tooth tiger or fighting in wars.
If you show any bit of vulnerability, it literally can be fatal. So that's hard wired in. So it's sort of pushing past that to be able to get in there, but there's such a market for it.
Pete Wright:
I'm telling you, I love what you do. I love that you're doing it.
Rachael Jaye:
Thank you.
Pete Wright:
Where do you want people to go find out more about you, Rachael?
Rachael Jaye:
So you can find me on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn @HKRcoaching. The website is HKRcoaching.com. If you go on there, I have a free download that is, "Five Fumbles When You're Trying to Score," and, "The Recoveries to Earn You Bedroom MVP," and it's pretty fun. [crosstalk 00:29:09].
Pete Wright:
Bedroom MVP. [crosstalk 00:29:12]. Why would you burry the lead, Rachael? We should have started with that.
Rachael Jaye:
You didn't ask.
Pete Wright:
What? Seth, come on.
Seth Nelson:
I've got a lot of questions now about bedroom MVP. Okay? Because I don't know- [crosstalk 00:29:26].
Pete Wright:
Did you fold the laundry?
Seth Nelson:
I don't know about any of you, but in my world, there's only two people in the bedroom at once. So are we competing with our significant other? Is there a group of people that- [crosstalk 00:29:40].
Pete Wright:
Guys, just everybody... It's very adversarial.
Rachael Jaye:
No, it's MVP versus benched.
Seth Nelson:
Got you. There's no middle ground. You're not just in the game. You either are a Hall of Famer or- [crosstalk 00:29:56]
Pete Wright:
Or you're not even playing.
Rachael Jaye:
Quite possibly. There varying degrees in between there, but if you want to be MVP.
Pete Wright:
I think I just learned more in the last little minute of innuendo than in the entire podcast. Thanks for that.
Rachael Jaye:
Oh, no.
Pete Wright:
I deeply appreciate it. Rachael Jaye, you're fantastic. Thank you for hanging out with us on The Toaster here.
Rachael Jaye:
Thank you, guys.
Pete Wright:
This has been great. And thank you, everybody, for downloading listening to this show. We sure appreciate your time and attention. On behalf of Rachael Jaye and the good Seth Nelson, I'm Pete Wright. We'll catch you next week right here on How to Split a Toaster, a divorce podcast about saving your relationships.
Speaker 5:
Seth Nelson is an attorney with Nelson Koster Family Law and Mediation with offices in Tampa, Florida. While we may be discussing family law topics, How to Split a Toaster is not intended to nor is it providing legal advice. Every situation is different. If you have specific questions regarding your situation, please seek your own legal counsel with an attorney licensed to practice law in your jurisdiction. Pete Wright is not an attorney or employee of Nelson Koster. Seth Nelson is licensed to practice law in Florida.
This transcript was exported on Mar 03, 2021 - view latest version here.
toaster_210 (Completed 03/02/21)
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