"What Are You Carrying?" by Chrissy Cole

What are you carrying that God never asked you to carry?

In this closing message of the Name the Chain series, Pastor Chrissy Cole teaches on the chain of control and the fear underneath it. Control can sound like responsibility, protection, or wisdom, but it often reveals where we are struggling to trust God.

Through Proverbs 3 and the example of Jesus, this message invites us to surrender our fears, release what we cannot control, seek God before we lead, and trust Him with the outcome. The burden was never meant to crush you. Jesus offers rest, freedom, and a lighter way to live.

• (00:00) - Closing the Name the Chain Series
• (00:44) - Control Is Rooted in Fear
• (02:39) - Mother’s Day, Pressure, and Letting Go
• (04:29) - Humanity’s Deep Need for Control
• (05:20) - How Control Connects to Every Chain
• (06:57) - The First Step to Freedom
• (07:30) - Control Reveals a Struggle With Trust
• (10:39) - Overwhelm Triggers the Need for Control
• (12:04) - Becoming Experts at Losing Control
• (12:35) - Trust in the Lord With All Your Heart
• (13:46) - Surrender All Your Fears
• (17:43) - Surrender What You Cannot Control
• (20:55) - What Are You Carrying
• (24:40) - Surrender Your Need to Lead
• (29:03) - Surrender the Outcome
• (34:29) - Jesus Offers Rest for the Heavy Burdened
• (37:02) - An Invitation to Surrender

Creators and Guests

Host

Chrissy Cole

Chrissy’s parents moved to the U.S. from the Philippines in the late 70′s. She saw her parents both come to know the Lord at a young age. She and her family poured their lives into the local church and were changed by God. Chrissy attended Evangel University in Springfield, MO and earned a B.A. in Communications with an emphasis in Public Relations.

What is Project Church?

A life-giving Jesus community for a new generation of people in Sacramento.

Join us every Sunday
Old Sacramento: 8:30 AM, 10:00 AM & 11:45 AM @ 1200 2nd Street, Sacramento, CA 95814
South Sacramento: 10:00 AM (English) & 11:30 AM (Spanish) @ 6528 44th Street, Sacramento, CA 95823
Online: https://www.youtube.com/projectchurchsac

00;00;00;00 - 00;00;17;27
Speaker 11
I can't wait to close up our series on naming the Chain. So we are continuing the series, but tell me that a man chose the topic for Mother's Day without telling me that a man chose the topic for Mother's Day.

00;00;18;00 - 00;00;44;02
Speaker 11
Today we are naming the chain of control. It's kind of funny, isn't it? It's okay. I'm totally not offended at all. And girls, we offense is a choice, so we're just going to walk away from that. And let me just tell you, I'm going to point back to every single chain that we have named in this series. And control is at the root of it because at the root of control is a fear.

00;00;44;05 - 00;01;09;02
Speaker 11
Got it. So we're not going to be offended today. Control and naming the chain and breaking the chain is for every single person in this room. But real quick, I do want to give a quick announcement to the women of the House that one of the ways that I have learned to work out control, figure out what I'm carrying, what I shouldn't carry is by doing life with women.

00;01;09;02 - 00;01;22;07
Speaker 11
Not just mahjong nights, not just going to brunch and having mimosas. But you know, if you don't believe alcohol is fine, just forget that I said that, you know?

00;01;22;09 - 00;01;45;07
Speaker 11
What I have found to be a strength in my life has been prayer. And there have been some sisterhood women that I've been praying with for a little over a year, every single Tuesday. And we have seen miracles happen because of the prayers that are prayed. And I have seen us go from a desperation for Jesus to answer some prayers, to then be very disciplined in our prayer life.

00;01;45;07 - 00;02;12;28
Speaker 11
And I think that's what we, as the body of Christ, should be helping form one another into the likeness of Christ. Christ prayed. He sweat blood because he was praying to his father in desperation. Can you imagine a house of God where women are desperate for a touch from his presence, from touch, from his spirit? So I want to invite every single woman, every single woman Thursday morning, starting next.

00;02;12;29 - 00;02;39;05
Speaker 11
This coming week. You can just on Thursday morning for the rest of the sisterhood, you are able to come pray for whatever you're you're desperate for. Are you desperate for your child coming back to the Lord? Are you desperate for your own spiritual wellness? Are you desperate for the lost ones? I want to invite you. Just go on the Church Center app and you can click on this sisterhood prayer Thursday morning.

00;02;39;05 - 00;02;56;11
Speaker 11
So, ladies, who signing up for that? Who's desperate for God to move? Yeah, I love it. Can't wait to see you there. So this morning I was so ready for today. I had my outfit ready. Caleb prepped the kids. Did you like how he matched me? I just wanted to know. You know, I bought this outfit and he found an outfit to match me.

00;02;56;11 - 00;03;23;06
Speaker 11
That was such a cute Mother's Day present, but I was so ready to start the day encouraging the women that I know that you may have had some control issues this morning because we want our husbands to be dressed. We want to be ready for the day. We want our kids. You know how hard it is to get three kids, and my kids are even, you know, 14, 13 and 11 or is she's 11, 14, 13, 11.

00;03;23;06 - 00;03;46;23
Speaker 11
And I was still trying to get them ready. I had to curl the hair, just the girls, and it was bananas in my mind. I was saying, you know what, release control, release control. But I was losing my mind, trying to keep control of my household and get here on time. Has anybody experience that? When you're trying to control things and you know that you shouldn't control things, right?

00;03;46;24 - 00;04;07;23
Speaker 11
You know what I'm saying? It gets worse. And then there's just this terrible cycle of losing your mind because you're losing control. I think a lot of women are aware of this, but men in the house, you are aware of how it what it takes to control your schedules. You know what it takes to control your money. You want to make sure it's going to the right place.

00;04;07;23 - 00;04;29;07
Speaker 11
You know, we want to make sure you're setting up your family the right way. And then there's a moment where all of us, while we know that we need to control our schedules, we need to control our money. Sometimes we try to control the people in our lives. So we try to control our children. And if we can't control people, then I'm going to at least try to control people's perception of me.

00;04;29;10 - 00;04;53;20
Speaker 11
And then when we can't control people's perception of us, maybe we just try to control our environment. Come on, there's some OCD people in the house, men and women alike. When we try to control our environment, there is just an awareness that humanity has a deep need for control. This isn't a woman issue and this isn't just a man issue.

00;04;53;21 - 00;05;20;10
Speaker 11
This is a humanity issue. Let me give you a very scientific working definition for control freaks, a person who has an obsessive need to control other people or situations. Let me link it back to every name that we change in every name that in every chain we named in this series, we talked about identity. When you don't know who you are, you try to control people's perception of you.

00;05;20;11 - 00;05;52;27
Speaker 11
You might say, I cannot show weakness or I will lose value. If you have trauma in your life, perhaps you're you're prioritizing safety and you're going to say, if people if I don't stay in control, then I'll probably just going to get hurt again. If you have insecurity, you micromanage people, or you have that jealous bone where you get really possessive and you say, if I don't do it myself, it's not get done right.

00;05;52;29 - 00;06;25;02
Speaker 11
You know, the root of that is probably insecurity. And then we might say, if you are all mine, if I have you to myself, if your children, your boyfriend or girlfriend, a spouse, you're like, then I can secure your love for me. That's coming out of a place of insecurity, generational cycles. We talked about this chain. Maybe you over function and overcompensate because I'm never going to be like my parents or my grandparents.

00;06;25;02 - 00;06;57;03
Speaker 11
I'm not going to be like them. So you control an over function, overcompensate. And then there's perfectionism. Any perfectionists in the room? This is when you say, if things don't go my way, I will lose my mind. I will not be okay. And you realize that you live life and you have joy based on conditions. And so this morning, I just want us to admit the first step to freedom is admission.

00;06;57;06 - 00;07;30;02
Speaker 11
Right? There's a deep need in humanity for control. And sometimes control can sound spiritual. Oh, I'm just being a good steward. Maybe I'm being responsible. Maybe I'm just being protective of my children. I'm just being protective of my marriage. But underneath it, fear is actually struggling to surrender. This morning, I want us to identify that your deepest need for control often points to your deepest struggle with trust.

00;07;30;04 - 00;07;54;06
Speaker 11
We see it throughout scriptures. Let me say it again. Your deepest need for control often points to your deepest struggle with trust. We see it throughout Scripture. Sarah in Genesis 16. She is really trying to control God's timing. If she's going to have this baby. And the root of that, you know, control issue is, what if God doesn't provide?

00;07;54;06 - 00;08;12;09
Speaker 11
How many people have been there? You're wondering, well, God provide for me. How can I trust maybe I need to take things in my own hand. Saul. Saul does this in first Samuel 13, where he's about to go in the battle. He's supposed to wait for Samuel to to make a sacrifice, but he does a sacrifice on his own.

00;08;12;09 - 00;08;36;02
Speaker 11
Pastor Caleb talked about it. This was in our series about or in our topic about insecurity. He was trying to control circumstances. He was trying to control people. The people were fleeing. So what did he do? He did the sacrifice on his own because he had the fear that, what if I lose control? Then you see, David, remember when he had an affair with Bashir?

00;08;36;04 - 00;09;00;16
Speaker 11
Then he manipulates and controls a situation in order to get her husband to be to be murdered. His fear was, what if I'm exposed for what I did as the King of Israel? Oh, and then there's Martha. Ladies, we all know that we've been accused of being Martha's at some point in our lives, right? And she was trying to control the responsibility and the order.

00;09;00;16 - 00;09;20;14
Speaker 11
Why is Mary sitting there? Somebody that close, a woman that close to Jesus's feet? It should be a man close to Jesus. And I am I am doing everything around here. And this chick is just sitting here. She was trying to control people. She is trying to control responsibility. She was trying to control order. And her fear was, what if everything falls apart?

00;09;20;16 - 00;09;51;20
Speaker 11
How many people have had these fears? Well, there is the quintessential spirit of control that we discover in Jezebel. You're like, don't you dare call me Jezebel. Here's what I want to say to you today. I don't want to call you Jezebel, but if we're not careful, the enemy will try to influence you or manipulate you and use your regrets and threaten your life in order that you might be a controlling person.

00;09;51;20 - 00;10;20;14
Speaker 11
And there's a spirit there that we do not want to partner with. Men and women are like the spirit, that Jezebel spirit, it can come on a man or a woman. And so I want to encourage you, let's not fall into the spirit of control. Don't partner with that. John reminds us of that in revelation 222. To not have that spirit, if we're going to be the end times people, the kingdom of God moving it forward, we can't have a controlling spirit.

00;10;20;16 - 00;10;39;09
Speaker 11
You might be thinking, well, I ain't Jezebel. This is so not me, Chrissy. I do not have control issues. The fact that you're trying to control my perception of you is the fact that you might have control issues. So my question for you is, okay, maybe you're not Jezebel, maybe you're not as controlling as other people in your life.

00;10;39;11 - 00;11;10;12
Speaker 11
But have you ever been overwhelmed? Typically, overwhelm comes because we have fear in our lives. Overwhelm can be the number one trigger for a heightened need for control. When we feel overwhelmed, we're like, we need to gain control. When we have too many bills, when we don't still don't have a job, when we still aren't married, when our relationships are falling apart, when our marriage is falling apart and we can't get our spouse to do what we want our spouse to do, and our kids are acting out.

00;11;10;12 - 00;11;35;23
Speaker 11
I don't know why they don't trust in God the way that I raise them to. I don't know why they don't clean their room when I tell them to. We have control issues when there's overwhelm. Psalm 55 five. So what David says fear and trembling have set me. Horror has overwhelmed me. When fear is overwhelming, we grasp for control.

00;11;35;26 - 00;12;04;05
Speaker 11
Scripture shows us that that could be the root of your fear or of your control. And if there's a fear, let me tell you that the antidote today. Easy surrender. It's surrender. You can't control everything, but you can surrender anything. You can surrender anything today. I don't want to just make jokes about how we're all control freaks, because here's the truth.

00;12;04;05 - 00;12;35;26
Speaker 11
We are. We're human. But can we get good at losing control? My message today is making us experts on losing control. How do we lose control? We surrender. And I want to point to the Scripture, the book of Proverbs, wisdom. And I just have two verses for you today, and we're going to break it down for parts of this scripture that's going to help you become an expert at losing control.

00;12;35;27 - 00;12;59;21
Speaker 11
Proverbs three five through six. Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and he will make straight your paths. He wants straight paths. How to become an expert at losing control. This is for men and women alike. Number one, surrender all your fears. Trust in the Lord with all your heart.

00;12;59;23 - 00;13;26;06
Speaker 11
God wants every part of your heart. There's no such thing as partial surrender. Do you hear me? Can you imagine if Jesus said, oh, maybe I'll stay on the cross for a little bit, but I won't surrender completely. Would there have been freedom for all of humanity? There's no such thing as partial surrender. And you might be thinking I am not a control freak.

00;13;26;07 - 00;13;45;29
Speaker 11
This is so not me. Just get off my back, Chrissy. Why today? Perhaps we need to take a look at some one. 3923 324. This is the the prayer of somebody who is overwhelmed by fear, who's being chased, and he's saying, search me and know my thoughts. Search me and know what things and what things I'm saying. Behaviors I have.

00;13;46;01 - 00;14;07;09
Speaker 11
Because it's probably there's some fears in there that I need you to remove. There's some fears that I think are very core to humanity fear of rejection, fear of failure, fear of the unknown. Some of us trying to figure out what's next. What's the future for my family? What's the future for my kids? Oh, what's going to happen?

00;14;07;09 - 00;14;29;14
Speaker 11
Because last time I was rejected. So how can I move forward? Or what if I fail? Oh, we are so burdened by the fear of failure. Some of us want to avoid our fears, but maybe some of us actually have to face them in order to gain freedom from them. Yeah, and so I walked down a path recently.

00;14;29;17 - 00;14;51;07
Speaker 11
I think you've heard that my husband started a side job, right? He's doing recruiting work with in the corporate world. And it's been great. It's been great. You know, 13 years we have worked together side by side. I know his schedule and, you know, then he now has another schedule. And I'm like, who are you hanging with? What's that female voice on the other line?

00;14;51;08 - 00;15;09;06
Speaker 11
I mean, so then I said, Lord, I don't want me to be an unsupportive wife because I have a fear that he's connecting with people and is in a whole nother environment that I don't know about. I think I told you the fear. I was like, maybe the only reason why our marriage is strong is because it's been convenient all these years.

00;15;09;06 - 00;15;32;12
Speaker 11
So I just, in my fear, acted out of character and assumed the worst about my husband. That happens when you have fears. You act out a character and assume the worst of people. So then I said, okay, okay, what if what if he took this job because there's a woman there? I had to go down this track. You guys, this is I had to face my fear.

00;15;32;12 - 00;15;52;14
Speaker 11
So I was like, maybe. Well, then what will happen? Well, well, maybe he'll have a secret relationship with her. I'm like, okay, okay, well, what if he has a secret relationship with her? Then we might. We might have to separate. Oh, then. Then what? The Holy Spirit just asked me. Then what? Well, then maybe you have to get a voice.

00;15;52;19 - 00;16;17;18
Speaker 11
Then what? Then she's going to get to know my kids. Then what? The kids like her more than me. You're going down. Then what? Then I would fall apart and not know what to do. Then what? Chrissy. Then I don't think I would pastor anymore. Then what? Chrissy. Then I would have to, like, grovel and stay at my friend's house and just be like, somebody take care of me.

00;16;17;18 - 00;16;46;17
Speaker 11
I can't live my life. Then what? Chrissy? Then what? Then what? Then what? But God will be at the end of my fear. The worst may happen in your life. Thank God. I trust that that's not going to happen in my life. But maybe some fears need to be walked through and face. And we say, then what? So that God has an opportunity for opportunity to say, but me, but God, I am at the end of every single one of your fears.

00;16;46;17 - 00;17;12;20
Speaker 11
We see it throughout Scripture. You intended me harm, but God intended it for good. My flesh and my heart might fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. With man this is possible, but with God all things are possible. Cast all your cares on him, for he cares for you. He will be at the end of every single one of your fears.

00;17;12;23 - 00;17;43;12
Speaker 11
What fear? Do you have? My answer to your fear is not control it. My fear is surrender and say, But God, but God, surrender all your fears. No partial surrender in this place. There's no such thing. Trust in the Lord with all your hearts. Number two, how do we become an expert at losing control? Surrender what you can't control.

00;17;43;15 - 00;18;13;24
Speaker 11
This is the part where it says. And do not lean on your own understanding. Listen. It's the spiritual and secular worlds alike. They all agree that humanity banks on the illusion of control. When we think we have control, we actually don't. It's an illusion. It's an illusion. And so many of us are focusing on the illusion of control, and it's actually hurting us more than it's helping us.

00;18;13;26 - 00;18;42;22
Speaker 11
I think about what Timothy Keller says when he taught on Proverbs and he said, wisdom is actually his definition. His working definition is wisdom is competency. Excuse me, wisdom is competency with regard to the reality of life. So when we are operating in control, we are not operating with wisdom. Do you hear that wisdom? The book of Proverbs is all a book of wisdom.

00;18;42;22 - 00;19;04;26
Speaker 11
And this is where we get the text that we're working from. If we're going to trust God, we're going to trust in the reality of our situations more than we are trusting in the illusion of our control. Does that make sense? It's actually hurting us more than it is helping us to believe in an illusion. And here's what I have seen happening in the gym.

00;19;04;28 - 00;19;23;22
Speaker 11
Caleb has come home with, like, weird. He's like working out his biceps, working out certain bigger muscle groups, and then he just has pains and random places in his body. Same has happened with me. I'm like, oh gosh, I don't know why I have that back pain or I don't know why I have that joint pain when I was working out my tris or I was working out my chest.

00;19;23;22 - 00;19;55;19
Speaker 11
I don't know what it is, but these pains don't seem to connect to the pains of the major muscle groups that I was working with. And so the Lord showed me. I believe that, you know, he wasn't talking to me about my workout, but he was showing me that as I was studying a lot of our aimless we went to our chiropractor recently, a lot of our ailments and a lot of the pains that we feel in our small tendons are not a matter of us focusing, focusing too much on the area that we're trying to work.

00;19;55;19 - 00;20;25;17
Speaker 11
It's us gripping too tightly to the weights that's causing the pain. And I wonder how many of us have this illusion of control so we grip tighter for more control. And we heard ourselves in all the other areas. I think about the details. The devil is in, the details that we try to control. Right. And I just want to remind you that God's understanding is infinite.

00;20;25;17 - 00;20;55;22
Speaker 11
Ours is finite. His wisdom is greater than ours. He has existed for all of time. He's the Alpha and the Omega. We have only lived in this life and will only be. But amidst our time here on earth, and somehow the illusion of control makes us feel like we have more wisdom, but we're actually hurting ourselves. So the title of my message, I don't think I even said it was what am I caring?

00;20;55;25 - 00;21;22;14
Speaker 11
What are you caring? What control are you carrying? And I want to give you some thoughts. Surrender filter so to say, for your anxious thoughts and your controlling tendencies. I'm just going to say that they're tendencies, right. And so this is how you should ask if I should carry something, should I be gripping this tightly or not. And there's three questions that are going to help you filter some of your anxieties.

00;21;22;15 - 00;21;42;19
Speaker 11
Okay. Number one, is it worth my concern? You know, when Kayla and I first got married, I was like, man, I'm going to be like, freaking best mom ever, best wife. I'm going to do all the laundry. I'm going to take care of thing. I may be a full time working mom, but working wife, but I am also going to do all the laundry.

00;21;42;21 - 00;22;06;04
Speaker 11
Partly because I'm a control freak and I like the way I fold more than the way he folds. Don't ask me about. Okay, so after we had our second child, I remember the hampers were overflowing, overflowing. And he's like, hey Chrissy, can I like how I just take care of my laundry? I'm like, what? Do you know what my role is in this household?

00;22;06;04 - 00;22;23;25
Speaker 11
I do the laundry. And do you know that I fold things like they do in retail stores, and you fold them in the middle where there's a line on your chest. You really want to go to church like that and what? Okay, I know you're please tell me some of you guys have these kinds of things. Right. Okay.

00;22;23;25 - 00;22;42;29
Speaker 11
Thank you. I was like, please, I can't have you going to church. And people thinking that I am not taking care of you. That's a prime example for is this worth my concern when I don't want my kids to do the dishes, although it would help me? Am I annoyed because of the way they put the dishes in?

00;22;43;00 - 00;23;07;20
Speaker 11
Can we put it from back to front cups on top? No glass on the bot. Anybody else? Okay, not at my nice knives in the utensil. And that's when I have to stop and ask, is this worth my concern. Number one. Number two, is it mine to control? We're at youth camp for my son when he was in sixth grade for the first time, and I was fearful.

00;23;07;22 - 00;23;27;14
Speaker 11
So he's going to be with all these high schoolers. Oh my goodness. So we went to just, you know, check in on Pastor Sam, how he was doing when I was 100% checking on my son. I'm sitting in the back of one of the services, and Conan's worshiping up there with his friends. Then I found myself just going like, oh, he's who is he hanging out with?

00;23;27;17 - 00;23;51;05
Speaker 11
Wait, why did they sit over there? Wait, where do they go? Wait. Are they being nice to my son? And I'm sitting in the back and I felt the Holy Spirit say, Chrissy, if you start projecting your fears and your insecurities on that boy of whether or not he's going to be accepted, you're passing on a curse that he did not ask for.

00;23;51;08 - 00;24;13;01
Speaker 11
I was like, Caleb began to play pickleball out there and not being service because I was so fearful that kids weren't kind of accepting that kids weren't going to like him, that he was going to be distracted worshiping. Let me ask you this question is this mine to control or number three, is it God's to handle? You know, I have so many friends.

00;24;13;02 - 00;24;40;20
Speaker 11
They they go through marital issues and I've had Caleb ask me, Chrissy, is this your problem to solve? Is this our problem to solve? And most of the time it's not ours to carry, but the Lord's. We need to surrender it to him. Number three, if we're going to become expert experts at losing control, we three surrender your need to lead in all your ways.

00;24;40;20 - 00;25;04;23
Speaker 11
Acknowledge him in all the situations and decisions. Are you bringing them to the Lord first? Are you inquiring of him the way David inquires of the Lord in his temple? Are you inquiring of God before you make a decision? Listen, this is I know I've been talking about women and some of my own issues, but this is for the men in the house.

00;25;04;25 - 00;25;33;12
Speaker 11
Can I tell you that it is easier for me? He's not perfect, Caleb. He is not perfect. Can I remind you, number one. Two, three. He is not perfect. But can I tell you I trust this man when I know that he is in his word, when he is praying, when he is so submitted to the Lord and surrendered himself, I trust him more to leave, because I don't want him to trust in himself.

00;25;33;15 - 00;26;10;05
Speaker 11
I want to trust I can submit to him because I know that he's trusting the Lord. And ultimately, I'm trusting the Lord by trusting my husband. Do you hear me? It's also scriptural.

00;26;10;07 - 00;26;41;22
Speaker 11
For his answers more than what I want. And normally it's comfort. Normally it's what what is comfortable and convenient. When you look at this word acknowledge, I was I was reading up on this in some book studies. It says that acknowledge that meaning is actually by seeking his wide a wise aid, by seeking God's wise counsel. He is the wonderful counselor, right?

00;26;41;24 - 00;27;07;29
Speaker 11
This is not just recognizing, oh, yeah, God, you know, this is the decision I'm going to make. Bless it. And I'll call that surrender. No no no no. This is acknowledging God first before we make a decision and knowing intimately what God actually thinks about what we're presenting to him. Have you ever had a boss or a leader in your life who's kind of a bulldozer?

00;27;08;01 - 00;27;32;17
Speaker 11
Right? And it's just like, I'm definitely just a means to your end CEO. Right? I just you don't even care about me, and you're just got to make all these decisions. And I'm like, okay. And then they come into a corporate meeting. They're like, my team did this. And we're all like, heck, a bitter, right? Have you ever been there in those situations where you're like, why is this dude getting all the credit for all my hard work?

00;27;32;20 - 00;28;02;08
Speaker 11
And you just feel like you've been bulldozed? Well that's it. That's what we are doing to God when we make decisions without acknowledging first, how often have we made God and ends a means to our preferred, convenient and comfortable end for doing the same thing? And here's the thing we need true surrender. We need God to actually be leading us, inquiring of his preference.

00;28;02;08 - 00;28;35;29
Speaker 11
When we inquire of God, his preferences, he likes to be worshiped a certain way. Those ways have to come before our ways, and our ways are normally comfortable and convenient, and everybody's just nice and happy. But sometimes conflict has to take place in order for peace to be made. And he's the peacemaker, not the peacekeeper. So some of us are making plans in your life, in our lives, without consulting the Lord and I, instead of making plans and calling it stewardship.

00;28;36;01 - 00;29;03;04
Speaker 11
Here's one of the principles and filters that we make. Decisions that we think are wise because it's acquiring of the Lord. First. When you make plans, remind yourself that God will never lead you to a decision that is outside of his presence, or outside of his house, or outside of his body. I see people making decisions. Oh, it's so wise, but you're totally disconnected from the body of Christ.

00;29;03;05 - 00;29;37;03
Speaker 11
Was that really the best decision? Oh, but it does not require anything but your own self-preservation. God will not lead us outside of his presence. So, number four, how are we going to become expert experts at losing control for surrender? The outcome? That line alone. I should just be like, mic drop. Surrender the outcome by you, right? Surrender the outcome and he will make your paths straight.

00;29;37;03 - 00;30;09;26
Speaker 11
He will make straight your paths again. I said this multiple times that Proverbs is a book that is all about wisdom. It's not actually just promises. And when I see us doing over and over is that we don't relinquish the illusion of control, and instead of living in the reality of protection, we just go our way. And again, we think that the path that is straight is a path that is easy and convenient and comfortable, but making straight the paths.

00;30;09;26 - 00;30;42;08
Speaker 11
When you read the original Hebrew on that, it's actually saying he makes plain, he makes plain your plan, his plan. So it's not. Oh, this is going to be the best ideal situation for me. No, he's going to make plain the route that you must go. Well, don't we want just for God to make things plain that you feel like even though you don't want to do it, you know you have to do it because you prioritize his obedient, your obedience to him over your preference.

00;30;42;11 - 00;31;03;22
Speaker 11
Sometimes God makes the way plain, not by removing discomfort, by by revealing where obedience actually is. Listen, I've had issues with control because I want a certain outcome and I'm going to have Caleb come up here. We have just a couple more minutes and I want to finish this real quick, but I want you to see really quickly, oh, this is going to be hard with like, I should have put it.

00;31;03;22 - 00;31;08;12
Speaker 11
Okay. We'll try it. So.

00;31;08;14 - 00;31;28;25
Speaker 11
Oh I'm like I got three minutes. Here we go. There's so many things in our lives that God has entrusted to us to have marriage show in the book Love and Respect. This represents marriage and we're holding in our hand and we're like, okay, okay, okay, Lord, I'm going to read all the books and gain all the knowledge, and I'm going to go to a therapist and love and respect.

00;31;28;26 - 00;31;48;08
Speaker 11
Okay. Now put it on me. Atomic habits. Some of us are concerned about our personal lives, our personal growth. Okay, it's not just about me and my husband. It's about me growing personally and growing in my discipline and habits and all the goals and things that I have for my life. It's getting a little heavy. Okay. What's this?

00;31;48;10 - 00;32;05;21
Speaker 11
Oh, and I have to maintain my friendships because the body of Christ. I need the body of Christ. Okay. Be good to my friends. And then. Yes, really understand that I need fight for my friendships. I need to schedule all the branches. I need to schedule all the mahjong. Come on. I got to do this. And then. Oh, raising giant killers.

00;32;05;21 - 00;32;22;21
Speaker 11
Yes. I want my kids to be giant killers. Lay it on me. I'm going to be the best mom ever. Whoa! Oh my goodness, I'm shaking. And then it's like. You know what? I pass to remind me I have to read my Bible. Got to go to prayer rooms. Gotta pray. All right, so let me get a 30,000 view.

00;32;22;24 - 00;32;40;26
Speaker 11
View on the scriptures. Don't go too hard okay. Thank you. Oh, it's getting heavier. Bible reading is kind of heavy. All right. Lead like it matters. Oh, and now I'm leading this organization and I'm pastoring. I need to lead people. Okay, lay it on me, Lord. Oh, yeah, I got it. Yeah. Got it. We're doing it. We're doing all the things.

00;32;40;26 - 00;33;01;15
Speaker 11
Okay. And then I still need to cook for my husband. I cook for my family. I need to keep up with my hobbies. I'd love to cook. Oh, my gosh, I underestimated the books that I chose here. And this is how we are in life. And what's in our right hand and what we can handle is obstructing our view.

00;33;01;17 - 00;33;23;18
Speaker 11
It's working. Other muscles. I am shaking because I have not been in the gym, but this is how most of us are caring life. It's heavy, isn't it? You're overwhelmed, aren't you? You can't see the future because you're reading all these books. Okay, now just imagine that. My right hand. I did not plan that well, but in my left hand.

00;33;23;20 - 00;33;44;05
Speaker 11
Just imagine the books right in front of me, in my left hand. They're still married. In my left hand. There's still friendship in my left hand. There's still my professional life in my left hand. There's still personal growth in my left hand. There's still how I'm going to be a great parent. There's still how I'm going to maintain the habits that I have and the and the and the hobbies that I have.

00;33;44;07 - 00;34;08;23
Speaker 11
And so many of us are leading with our right hand and we're leading with overwhelm. And we need to put that behind our back. And we have to understand that his burden is light. He hasn't asked you to stop caring for all those things. He asked you to stop carrying it on your own. This is the this is the picture of the life that God wants for us.

00;34;08;25 - 00;34;29;08
Speaker 11
We're not shaking. We're not overwhelmed. When you're holding on to that, everything has to be so structured. You're going to lose your mind when things don't go your way. When conditions get bad, you will drop the books and you'll focus on picking up the books. But when you have the feathers and you realize that the burden is actually so light with him, he says this.

00;34;29;10 - 00;34;50;07
Speaker 11
And Matthew 1128 come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. God wants to give humanity rest. He never asks you to carry things that you are expecting yourself to carry. He's never asked you to carry all of that on your own. He said, surrender to me. That is a selfish life.

00;34;50;07 - 00;35;15;01
Speaker 11
This is a surrendered life. And listen. His yoke is easy, his burden, his life. Some of us are experiencing the pain and the and the weights of this, and it's crushing us because we have a savior complex. We want to save our kids. We want to save our marriage. We want to make our lives better. We want to fulfill the version.

00;35;15;01 - 00;35;42;01
Speaker 11
We have a Savior complex. But our Savior gave us the example of surrender our Savior when he was in the garden and and the and the the Roman soldiers took him away. And even his control freak friend Peter tried to cut off a soldier's ear. He he said, no, no, no, no, I'm surrendering. This is this is what God wants for me.

00;35;42;02 - 00;36;12;12
Speaker 11
Do you think it's the outcome that Jesus hoped for, that he would be sent to have a crown of thorns on his head, or his body being 39 times to the point that you could see his internal organs. Do you think that was his preferred outcome? Jesus said in the garden before everything happened, or while he said this, that he said to them, my soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death.

00;36;12;14 - 00;36;36;10
Speaker 11
This is when he was the garden. My soul is overwhelmed. And what he did he say, take this cup for me. Take this cup for me. That was him saying, I surrender the Savior of the world who had the power to remove himself off that cross. He said, I surrender. I commit my soul to you. He didn't die from everything.

00;36;36;10 - 00;37;02;06
Speaker 11
That humanity did it to him. He decided that I give up my soul to the one who sent me on mission, who has a plan that made my path straight. It was hard. It was convenient. But I wanted to cast out all fear because I am love. And by surrendering, I was able to give you love. And you have freedom because of what Jesus did, what.

00;37;02;06 - 00;37;02;19
Speaker 6
He do.

00;37;02;21 - 00;37;30;15
Speaker 11
He surrendered it all. And when we. Have the tendency to control, we can surrender it all. If you're tired from maintaining control, I want to pray for you. If you found that your pride has caused you to take on more than Jesus ever ask you to. I want to pray for you. If you feel like you've been a hamster and a hamster wheel and you are spin your wheels, you're spending all the plates.

00;37;30;15 - 00;37;55;18
Speaker 11
I want to pray for you. Because the Spirit of God, when we all experience, is fresh wind. He refreshes our soul and he tells us, I got this. The burden is light. We need to be led by him. We may be led by His Spirit and be reminded that burden is light. Let me be an expert at losing control.

00;37;55;20 - 00;38;15;05
Speaker 11
I surrender it all to him. Put your bow, your heads in this place. I want to give you an opportunity really quickly. We don't have much time to surrender your life to him. This is your opportunity to say yes to Jesus. And I think it was playing instead of taking control of your life. The burden is too much to bear.

00;38;15;08 - 00;38;35;07
Speaker 11
Cast all your burdens on him because he cares for you. He died for you. You see, we we see. We heard that he surrendered everything. The Savior of the universe, Jesus, so that you might have freedom. If you want to experience a relationship with him and you want to surrender your life by making him the Lord of your life, would you raise your hand on the count of three?

00;38;35;08 - 00;38;51;05
Speaker 11
I want to give you an opportunity to receive Christ and say yes to him. Say yes to a light burden. Say yes to giving him control. If that's you, would you raise your hand on count three, one, two, three. You want to surrender your life to him? Yeah. Amen. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven. Eight. Nine. Ten.

00;38;51;06 - 00;39;12;24
Speaker 11
11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. So many hands in the room. And listen. Our our hosts in the back. They have these cards that if you want to fill that out afterwards, we want to connect with you and help you on this journey. When you can surrender like that. Come on. You're you're not you're you're making one time decision for salvation, but sanctification.

00;39;12;24 - 00;39;31;21
Speaker 11
We want to walk with you on that so you can put your hands up. I want to pray for you when everybody repeat after me as I pray with these who raise your hand. Dear Jesus, thank you for bringing me here today to hear your truth. I accept you into my life. I make you the Lord of my life.

00;39;31;29 - 00;40;00;06
Speaker 11
I confess my need of you. I have a desperation for you now. So give me the faith to live for you, to be guided by you and to be helped by you. I love you, Jesus. In your precious name, amen and amen. Amen, Amen. Come on. Yes. Give God a hand. He deserves a praise. Would you stand in this room?

00;40;00;09 - 00;40;03;18
Chrissy Cole
Thank you for being a part of our online community here at Project Church.

00;40;03;19 - 00;40;07;00
Chrissy Cole
We hope that this message and the whole service bless your life.

00;40;07;03 - 00;40;23;08
Caleb Cole
Yeah. And if it did, we want to ask that you would do something for us. First of all, if you're not already subscribed to our YouTube channel, be sure to subscribe. Like this video. But also, we would ask that you would consider financially supporting what God is doing through Project Church. You can give in a variety of ways.

00;40;23;11 - 00;40;38;17
Caleb Cole
You can text project to 97,000. Right now. You can give to our Church Center app, or you can give on our website project church.com/give. Thanks so much for being a part of our online community. And once again God bless you guys. We'll see you soon.