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Jacek Waliszewski is a US Army Special Forces Green Beret, author, and military advisor. Having lived a life of diplomatic travel and adventure, Jacek shares his take on how to maximize opportunity regardless of how much you have or where you are from. He also shares the story of how he committed his first political act of resistance at three months old.
Show Notes
Maximizing Opportunities with Jacek Waliszewski.
Jacek Waliszewski is a US Army Special Forces Green Beret, author, and military advisor. He immigrated to America as a political refugee with his family and $200 in the 1980s and he has since lived a life of diplomatic travel and adventure. Jacek shares his take on how to maximize opportunity regardless of how much you have or where you are from. He reveals the premise for his latest novel, Air Boat, loosely based on his time serving in the Afghanistan War, as well as the story of how he committed his first political act of resistance at three months old.
Show Outline:
- 00:00 - Intro
- 04:13 - Steak and Wine Please!
- 14:20 - Pierogis or Pizza?
- 16:13 - Air Boat
- 20:39 - The Last Green Beret in Helmand
- 23:18 - Propaganda Papers
- 32:26 - Opportunity Made
- 49:11 - What If I’m Stuck?
- 56:02 - Maximizing Opportunity
- 58:47 - Which Way To Go?
Next Steps:
- Connect with Jacek to chat over coffee, collaborate on projects, or request mentorship.
- Share your takeaways from this episode @OpportunityMade or #OpportunityMade on LinkedIn.
- Send this podcast to your network as a first step in making and maximizing new opportunities!
Episode Resources:
Creators & Guests
What is Opportunity Made?
The Opportunity Made Show offers practical lessons to break patterns, get unstuck, and find freedom in business and life. In each episode of Opportunity Made, Katherine Lewis brings you empowering insights and easy-to understand takeaways you can use to transform your life. You'll learn effective ways to grow as a leader, clear your success blockers, and make new opportunities, giving you a life you love!
Opportunity Made, Jacek Waliszewski, How to Maximize Opportunity
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[00:00:00] Jacek: My dad was a co-founder for Solidarity, the movement that eventually kicked communism out of Poland. As soon as he got arrested, the Babushka Network went out and they said, Leszek got arrested at the train station and my mom's like, oh no, because she's got propaganda papers on the dinner table.
[00:00:16] So she stuffs 'em together and then she hears the boot jacks coming up the apartment complex stairwell, and she knows they're coming for her. So she grabs 'em. She shoves 'em in my diaper, knowing that that's probably the only place the communists aren't gonna look.
[00:00:29] [music]
[00:00:44] Katherine: Hello everybody and welcome to Opportunity Made, the podcast that is based upon the idea that we can make new opportunities for ourselves and others on a regular basis, if we're willing to take chances, be intentional in our actions, and invest deeply in our own lives. I am your host, Katherine Lewis. I am a European American woman with short blonde wavy hair, which is currently tied back.
[00:01:08] I am wearing a blue knitted top and there is a white wall behind me. Today, we are talking about maximizing opportunity with US Army Special Forces Green Beret, Jacek Waliszewski. Welcome Jacek!
[00:01:21] Jacek: Thanks for having me.
[00:01:22] How are you?
[00:01:23] Katherine: Doing great. How are you?
[00:01:25] Jacek: I'm good. I'm good.
[00:01:26] Katherine: Do you mind giving an audio description of yourself?
[00:01:29] Jacek: Yeah, absolutely. I am a Caucasian male wearing a light blue button down shirt. I'm sitting in my living room. Behind me is a map of the world with pins of places that I've seen or visited or worked in. I'm Polish and, uh, when I had hair, cuz I'm bald now, but uh, when I had hair, it was dark Hazel.
[00:01:52] Katherine: I love the map behind you and approximately how many pins do you have in there? It's a lot.
[00:01:57] Jacek: I'm at over 40 countries. So it's all through the US up to Alaska, there's, uh, Afghanistan, there's a couple pins in there and then there's just a boatload in Europe and a couple in Africa as well as the Middle East.
[00:02:15] Katherine: Wow. So really all over the place. What's your favorite place that you've traveled?
[00:02:20] Jacek: Oh, that's a good question. I would have to say, well, there's two, two different reasons. Sweden would be one and then Kenya would be another. The people are amazing, the cultures are amazing. They're completely contrasted or especially in Kenya, but, um, even though that, it's just a great place to be and the people are welcoming. That's one of the best things.
[00:02:45] Katherine: When I think about those two different places, Sweden and Kenya are totally different.
[00:02:51] Jacek: I'll say this. Yeah. Yeah.
[00:02:52] Katherine: So it sounds like really the people make it the best experience, right? Even though it's so contrasting.
[00:03:00] Jacek: Yeah, absolutely. I was actually born in Poland, um, left when I was about three and I've lived in five or six different states. Um, moved back to Europe in the nineties, came back to the states in 2000 and onward, moved to Germany. That was my first duty station, and so my life has always been somewhere else. It's never grounded in one location. So Sweden, Kenya, some of the most welcoming, uh, cultures I've ever been to.
[00:03:30] Katherine: I know I have family from Sweden, and I have family that work often in Kenya. So it sounds like two places that I need to visit.
[00:03:38] Jacek: So that's amazing. Do you, do you know where in Sweden?
[00:03:41] Katherine: I don't. I don't. That would be something I'd love to explore, is do a little bit of family history.
[00:03:47] Jacek: Yeah. Yeah. Their family lineages. They go back hundreds and hundreds of years. Cause my history goes back to, I think 900. They went all the way back to the Valchich clan, which means the fighting clan. We were, uh, diplomats. We made sure the other tribes got along so that everybody was playing nicely.
[00:04:05] Katherine: Well, I feel like that plays very well into what you do today.
[00:04:09] Jacek: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it does.
[00:04:13] Katherine: Do you wanna tell us a little bit more about that?
[00:04:15] Jacek: I am a US Army Special Forces, Green Beret. I'm a warrant officer. I've been in now for 16 years. I started off as a 18 Delta, which is a Special Forces Medic and to label it short, we are military advisors. I was trying to categorize what my job entails, but every year has collectively been different than every other year. There's a new adventure. There's a new problem set. There's a new challenge. There's a new success. I used to change jobs before when I was a free range human, before the Army. I couldn't find a job that I wanted. I enlisted as a private, into the Army. That was 2006 and I have not looked back since. It's amazing. Every year feels like a new year, and the adventures are brand new. While my body may not claim that I've only been in the Army for a year, but I feel like I've only been in the Army for a year.
[00:05:07] Katherine: That is fantastic. I mean, one just to be a human being who feels like their job is that fresh and is that excited to do their work is fabulous, especially in the military as well. I don't find many people in the military who have that same kind of experience. Is this because of your particular role or your outlook? What makes the difference?
[00:05:27] Jacek: Yeah, no, that, that, that's actually a great question. I was in ROTC in college from 2000 to 2003 and I was about to be a Lieutenant and I had a year left before I had to commission. I was just like, you know what, this isn't what I want right now. And so I literally walked away from college, walked away from the scholarship and the Army.
[00:05:46] I traveled a lot and then I ended up over the course of a few years being a bartender in DC. That was a great job. I did that for about a year straight. And the genesis of being a Green Beret was, uh, one of the guys that would come in, he was, you know, shaved face. He looked a little grumpy and I asked him, I was like, you know, what can I get you?
[00:06:08] He's like a steak and, and a bottle of wine. I was like a glass? And he's like, no, the whole bottle. And I'm like, okay. So here's the bottle, got him a steak and, uh, we talked. We had a good banter and then about six months later, a guy sits down in my bar. He's got a big beard. He's, you know, his, his arms are just rippled. He's tanned.
[00:06:26] He looks angry and frustrated and I'm like, hey, what can I get you? And he's like, that's the same steak and the same wine that you got me six months ago. And I'm like, how do I know this guy? Over time he became a regular. We started talking and he told me all of his adventures and he was a Green Beret.
[00:06:44] We're talking 2005 timeframe when the war just started and I was like, huh, it really sounds like there's a whole new aspect of life that I have no access to and I never will, unless I do what this guy does, so I asked him about it and he was like, yeah you should go in.
[00:07:00] There's a Special Forces program or you can go from the streets all the way to being a Green Beret. It's called the 18 x-ray contract. I went to the recruiter the very next day. I was like, hey, what can you tell me about the 18 x-ray contract? And the recruiter just shakes his head.
[00:07:17] I'm like, what, what, whoa, what's wrong with the 18 x-ray contract? He's like, I've, I've sent seven. And I was like, okay, how many have made it? He's like, none. I'm like, all right, I'll, I'll be your eighth. And uh, he's like, okay. And so I sign up and a month or two later, I ship out to Fort Benning, the Airborne School, and then Fort Bragg and three years later I came out with a Green Beret and the first thing I did, I wrote a letter to that recruiter. I was like, hey, I made it. I don't know if he got it, but you know, at least I tried.
[00:07:45] It's a phenomenal adventure. I haven't looked back. I've definitely found myself in places in the world where I'm like, what, how'd I get here? Like how am I the only one here? Or are we really about to do this? And it's like, yeah this is part of the job. You're like, okay, let's do this.
[00:08:03] It's exhilarating. It's amazing. You get to work with some phenomenal people. I've never met the type of people I work with because they also come from all walks of life. They're also called to this spirit of adventure, you know, spirit of solving impossible problems. You get to know them and you realize that, hey, there's amazing people out there and this seems to be where they congregate.
[00:08:22] Katherine: It's like you all were drawn together by, is it the search for adventure or you're just particular kind of people who would be interested in this? What pulls you together?
[00:08:34] Jacek: Everybody has their different motivations to enter the military. Um, some for the adventure, some for the challenge, some to pay for college. There seem to be certain group of people that see things differently in the world and they know that they can apply their perspectives towards a solution that is more complicated to some, but for them it just seems easy. And they're like, wait well the answers right here? Why can't we do it like this? Well, if we do it like that, that answers the problem and that's amazing, and you just saved us years of effort.
[00:09:11] I was sharing a story with another friend and uh, they were like, that's amazing. And I kind of looked at 'em. I was like, yeah, but that's like every day to me because I work with other amazing people. So we exist in this little world of everybody has an amazing story or an amazing adventure, but because it's so commonplace to have that together, we lose sight of the awesome things that we're doing. And we just take it as normal at a certain point, which is both humbling as well as explaining what you've done or what problem you've solved in the world, friends and family that kind of look at me like, there's no way that story's true.
[00:09:45] You're like, yeah, that's true. Yeah. I have pictures. I have picture like, it's true. I met this guy and then we had this conversation and, you know, we solved that problem and you're like, huh, and you just did it?
[00:09:56] Especially my mom, I love my mom, but she's like, what do you do again? I was like I'm a military advisor. I go to countries and I solve complicated problems. And I work with partners and encourage them to solve their own problems. She's like, that doesn't make sense to me. I was like, that's okay, mom, like, can, can I have some more perogi? It's the only job that's kept me interested for 16 years. So there's gotta be something to it.
[00:10:20] Katherine: I absolutely love that idea of having people who are of high quality, solving problems, but do it in simple ways. I actually was interested in becoming a Marine when I was younger because I wanted the challenge.
[00:10:34] I wanted to be around a higher caliber and so I get that. I get that culture. There's also different cultures when it comes to the military, but that one in particular is just so exhilarating. I bet you have some incredible stories and know some people, as you were saying, if we heard their stories and we know who they were be like, and you just sat down and had lunch with this guy! Like how does that happen?
[00:10:56] Jacek: They're people too at the end of the day. It's amazing. Yeah.
[00:10:58] Katherine: Exactly. Yeah. I found that when you can humanize people and bring them down to a level of we're all humans, we all eat, we all sleep and see people through that lens, it's so much easier and it's a lot more accessible to reach out to anyone and then you can start forming opportunities and you just make things happen versus, uh, putting barriers between yourself and others because you feel insufficient or they feel off limits or something like that.
[00:11:28] Jacek: Yeah. I have found that some of my best I'll call 'em diplomatic successes is where you just walk over, shake the person's hand because you know that they may be as equally nervous as you are. And you're like, hey, how's it going? How are the kids? You guys play soccer? Like, what are we doing later? And you don't talk about work in a work capacity and put the person first and the work will get done but doesn't have to get done at that moment. Put the person first. Realize that they have feelings, and like you said, they wake up and they get dressed too, and they eat food, they're as human as we are.
[00:12:02] What I've seen is that some people have a barrier and they don't recognize that that person's a person, because of a culture, because of a language and that can make things a little bit more complicated, but I think once you cross that barrier, you can get down to business and some amazing things can happen.
[00:12:18] Katherine: Yeah. And we can take it either way. Sometimes we put people up on a pedestal and sometimes we demean them as less than human, right? So when we can just bring it back to the balance, uh, I think it's good. Any other tips on diplomacy? I realize there must be a ton that, you know, when you're advising different countries.
[00:12:37] Jacek: Uh, it depends on where you go and you know what you're bringing to the table. Starting with the honest dialogue is a very interesting approach. I've succeeded more in complicated situations where I've met with a host nation Colonel or General and said, hi, you know, my name's Jacek. I'm a warrant officer of this team and I don't fully understand what's going on here, but you do so, um, how can we help, you know, how do you see us fitting into this problem?
[00:13:10] They usually look at us and they're like, well, that's interesting because all the other military people or Americans that have come in have told us what they're gonna do for us and what we're gonna do for them. You're the first person actually collaborating. Um, we're like, well, it's your country, it's your language, it's your people. It's fundamentally your problem that we're here to assist you to fix or to adjust, but to approach any problem set thinking that you have all the answers, it's not the best approach, especially in a diplomatic situation.
[00:13:44] Katherine: It's so simple, but it's so powerful to just remember that you are coming to support someone else. So find out what their needs are, what do you need?
[00:13:52] Jacek: Yeah.
[00:13:52] Katherine: How can I help?
[00:13:53] Jacek: If you're a repair man showing up to fix somebody's house, you don't just show up and start fixing the house. You actually talk to the owner and ask them what is broken. How can we fix it? What's your budget? If you apply that same approach, it's wonderful.
[00:14:10] Katherine: Yeah, absolutely. We're gonna go to some rapid fire questions. Polish or English?
[00:14:17] Jacek: I speak English and Russian and Polish.
[00:14:20] Katherine: Pierogis or pizza?
[00:14:21] Jacek: Uh, pierogis all the way.
[00:14:22] Katherine: Mm what's the stuffing? What's inside?
[00:14:25] Jacek: My favorite is onion and meat. And then you throw 'em on the fryer a little bit and so they get brown and then, uh, you throw chopped bacon on top of that. It's phenomenal. I have, I I've only ever found it in Poland. I've never found it in America. Maybe if I went to Chicago, but it's, it's the best.
[00:14:44] Katherine: I can't believe this because in America I have had the meat and onion, but I have never had bacon and when I think of all countries to put bacon on anything, like what? Why are we not putting bacon on it?
[00:14:54] Jacek: Little sprinkles of bacon. It's like heaven.
[00:14:57] Katherine: Oh my goodness. I love the cheese ones, but I don't know, now you've just set a new bar.
[00:15:02] Jacek: Yeah. Well, it's an adventure, right? You gotta, you gotta go out there and try 'em all.
[00:15:06] Katherine: Yeah, absolutely. Okay. So we talked about favorite places you've traveled. You've got Sweden and Kenya and a bunch of other ones in there. When I think about traveling to new country and understanding their culture, part of that is sports. So soccer or football?
[00:15:21] Jacek: Uh, I will go soccer because my kids they're very much into soccer right now. They will play for three, four hours even out, back just shooting at the garage. The garage is a big goal for them. So, I mean, yeah, it's, we're soccer family now.
[00:15:35] Katherine: Do you have a particular team you cheer for?
[00:15:38] Jacek: Um, I'll support local and go with the, uh, Colorado switchbacks.
[00:15:42] Katherine: Nice. Yeah. Yeah. That's pretty good. I love watching soccer and then getting empenadas, it's my favorite combination.
[00:15:49] Jacek: Okay. What's your favorite team?
[00:15:52] Katherine: Um, you know, I don't have one. I will watch anything. Nice. I, yeah, I'm just down for a good game.
[00:15:59] Jacek: That's always the best.
[00:16:00] Katherine: Yeah. It's okay. Movies or books. What are you into now?
[00:16:05] Jacek: I've just finished writing a book, so I haven't been able to read any books in the past couple of weeks. So I've been focusing entirely on that effort.
[00:16:13] Katherine: Wait, you wrote a book?
[00:16:16] Jacek: Uh, yeah, the Genesis is Afghanistan. We were working 20 hours a day. We were the last Green Beret team in Helmand right before Afghanistan collapsed and so it's kind of like that feeling I would imagine if you were driving across the bridge and behind you, the bridge is collapsing and you're like this is getting very fast, uh, drive faster. But we were still there. We were still trying to hold the country together, at least the province together.
[00:16:45] Some people, they like to learn how to play guitar, they like to read, they like to watch movies, play Xbox. That's how they decompress, and, uh, the way my mind works is it never gets out of sixth gear, and so I was living in a 20 feet by eight feet metal box.
[00:16:57] I had a bed and a dresser and a desk. Every night I'd go there and the only way I could decompress was by writing. Um, because prior to that, I tried to read a book. They had these big dusty libraries cuz you know, people had been there for 20 years. I was like, okay, I don't wanna read a history book.
[00:17:15] I don't wanna read a thriller. I don't wanna read a book about war right now. I am fundamentally like a romantic at a heart and uh, I pick up a romance book and I was like, I can't read this. This isn't written for me and so I was like, maybe I could write this.
[00:17:28] It's a romantic book of a Green Beret, in his second chapter of life and it's written in a way that there's the romantic element, but where a guy could appreciate reading it. So that all came together and I created another world to live in and then I'd go to sleep and I'd wake up and I'd be in Afghanistan and then I'd come back. I'd write another chapter or two and then I would just cycle this for couple months and I put it away, and then a couple months ago I picked it back up and I was like, hey, this is actually pretty good, like, I should probably finish this. That's been my project. It finally got to a place where I like it and I'll be publishing here soon.
[00:18:06] Katherine: Yay. That's so exciting!
[00:18:09] Jacek: It's exciting. It's, it's one of those, you know, check the block type things, but yeah, I rather enjoyed writing, I'll be retiring in a couple years and maybe I'll adventure into that realm of the world.
[00:18:19] Katherine: That is incredible. I could imagine that after, you know, a long day in Afghanistan, you have to have some way to decompress. You were naming some of the ways other people chose. Writing, what experience does that create for you? How does it emotionally and mentally decompress you?
[00:18:36] Jacek: Imagine that you wake up in the morning and you go into work, um, and every hour could be different or there could be catastrophe, a calamity, something amazing happen.
[00:18:49] Your stress levels are just going up and down, up and down, just even throughout the day if you just like, hey, I'm gonna go out for lunch. You walk across the street, grab lunch, come back, and everybody could be in the, uh, the situation room, uh, because something amazing or something big is happening. And it, it could transpire in the course of a second.
[00:19:08] For me, what I found is at the end of the day, I'll have those feelings and those feelings and emotions, they have to go somewhere, cause if they don't, they just sit within you.
[00:19:16] Katherine: Did you notice a difference between you and maybe teammates who didn't have a way to get some of this stuff out or didn't pick a way?
[00:19:25] Jacek: At this level of work everybody I work with is very smart, very capable, very savvy. Um, and we also look out for each other. We recognize, especially nowadays that there's different levels of wounds. They're not all physical, stress can become a wound.
[00:19:42] We do a really good and very intentional job of looking out for each other. I mean, cuz a Special Forces team, there's 12 guys and we're the only ones there. In Helmand it was us 12 and then 10,000 Afghans. It's a very isolating event and you learn to lean on each other for jokes and for comfort and for adventure and for trust and in a very manly way you learn to love these guys. As a loving team, that's willing to fight and die for each other, there's something poetically beautiful about that.
[00:20:17] Katherine: Yeah, absolutely. I would imagine some of that same feel is what's woven into your book.
[00:20:25] Jacek: Oh, that's a really good insight. Yeah. I'm going to have to say yes that I definitely would reread it and be like, oh, this happened in real life or a version of this happened in real life. And so I did draw from that. Yeah. That's a good insight.
[00:20:39] Katherine: Earlier, I heard that you were the last Green Beret in Helmand.
[00:20:43] Jacek: Yeah. And so we were, and what was actually really interesting with that was, uh, National Geographic was following us for six months when we were in Afghanistan. They were trying to capture what it's like to get ready for our mission and go into a mission.
[00:20:57] We deployed and we didn't even know Afghanistan was gonna collapse, so what they inadvertently captured was the collapse of Afghanistan. That's gonna be interesting documentary on that. It's coming out sooner than later, but it's not out yet. They filmed us in all walks of life, us going to the chow hall or shaving, or playing golf, or burning some time.
[00:21:20] I wonder what made it in there because they captured all of it and so it's gonna be interesting kind of looking back on ourselves, that's gonna be a philosophical kind of self-awareness thing. Like, oh, that's what I look like when I'm busy and working and haven't slept in two days.
[00:21:39] I'm excited to see it, uh, just cuz of what it could end up meaning and representing cuz it was effectively the closeout of a 20 year war. So that's gonna be an epic historical vantage point, especially from a special operations vantage point.
[00:21:58] Katherine: What do you hope the main message is?
[00:22:01] Jacek: Oh, wow. That we did our jobs at the very end. We may not have had all the right answers at that moment, but we are as human as the person standing next to us and we made the best decision we could with what we knew at the time.
[00:22:18] Maybe in a deeper sense after 20 years of war, especially in Afghanistan, as complicated as that place was, if it can maybe give some closure to somebody, or some insight, like, cause you think about it, I have two young boys and so if they can put a degree of reality to what dad does when he's gone for six months, it's like, oh, he does work, and this is a version of that work, and this is why he does it. Maybe it'll explain things to them a little more. If that can also provide some closure, some insight and some value to another family, then that was worth it.
[00:22:57] Katherine: So multiple layers, not only for your own family of explaining this is what dad does, this is where he's been, but I could imagine families with other people who've been in and maybe even families who've lost someone. Sometimes it doesn't make sense why it's happening so maybe the story can share a little bit more.
[00:23:18] Jacek: Yeah. I'm hoping it does.
[00:23:18] Katherine: Let's chat a little bit more about your family. You were born in Poland. How did you end up in America?
[00:23:25] Jacek: Oh, yeah. This one's one of those things that people look at me and they raise an eyebrow. They're like, that's not possible. I was like, no, it's absolutely possible.
[00:23:31] I was born in, uh, Poland, right when Marshall Law happened back in the early eighties. And my dad, Leszek Waliszewski, was a co-founder for Solidarity, the movement that eventually kicked communism out of Poland. I have pictures of him and Lech Walesa, the first president of Poland, they've got their big bushy seventies era mustaches, and yeah, they're all looking over paperwork and documentation.
[00:23:56] They're literally planning out this resistance movement, which, by a lot of metrics was one of the most successful in history, cause it was nonviolent. So I didn't meet my dad cuz he was arrested. My mom got pregnant and he was arrested and put in jail and I didn't meet him till I was six months old. It was funny because my mom said she would take solidarity propaganda papers and put 'em in my diaper and, uh, smuggle them in and out of jail that way, just hoping that I didn't pee on them. She learned this technique because as soon as he got arrested, the Babushka Network went out and they said, Leszek got arrested at the train station and my mom's like, oh no, because she's got propaganda papers on the dinner table.
[00:24:37] So she stuffs 'em together and then she hears the boot jacks coming up, the, uh, the apartment complex stairwell, and she knows they're coming for her. So she grabs 'em. She shoves 'em in my diaper, knowing that that's probably the only place the communists aren't gonna look and she was right.
[00:24:53] They tore up all the cupboards, flipped all the couches and they were looking for reasons to even arrest her. My first act in a resistance movement was as a smuggler. When he did finally meet me they were in the cell block and he holds me up and he was like, this is Jacek Waliszewski. This is proof the resistance movement will live on. At first I thought that was a little dramatic, but, uh, the more I learned about the situation, you know, the Soviets were on the border.
[00:25:19] They were prepared to reinvade Poland and, um, the Polish government at that time was considering trading out all the Solidarity leaders to the Soviets where they would've been executed. To be the first born son of resistance founder, that carries both a lot of weight and a lot of weight that I can't carry and live up to. I can just enjoy knowing that that's part of my lineage. It's a huge historic genesis and just being proud to be even remotely related to that.
[00:25:51] When they found out that I was born, the prisoners got together and they ripped up a old bedsheet in the prison and it's got the Polish Eagle on there and they wrote out congratulations, to Leszek Waliszewski for the birth of the son and so I have a prison birth certificate.
[00:26:08] My mom at that point, she was aware of what was going on. So she went to the American embassy and filed for refugee status for political refugees and the Reagan administration, I think they knew who my father was and the hierarchy of the solidarity movement.
[00:26:25] So we went to East Germany, then West Germany, and then we moved to North Carolina and, um, yeah, it was an epic, epic adventure. We landed with two suitcases and $200 and no one spoke English. I think in line with your podcast, what I'm realizing is that was an opportunity. At that point, like you have nothing, so where do you go? You go up, you go forward. That's, that's your chance. That's all you get, you know?
[00:26:55] My dad worked two jobs as a painter and computer repairman. My mom was cleaning houses and then the Polish community at that time just bound together and we all took care of each other.
[00:27:06] Now that I'm at my age and I'm reflecting on my kids, I'm like, that's terrifying. Imagine jumping on a plane with the alternative of being traded out to Soviets behind you. Like, you're gonna go to a country and you don't speak the language and here's a couple bucks, so good luck. Yeah. Not a lot of people I think could pull that off today.
[00:27:26] Katherine: That is an incredible opportunity. And as you said, you can only go up. I mean, at that point you have nothing, you have no ties, you have no community, so you can only build from there.
[00:27:37] Jacek: My father got a business degree. He started working for General Motors. He worked his way up the chain and he got to the point where he was handpicked to help found the Saturn plant in Tennessee.
[00:27:51] And then when the wall fell in the nineties, they turned to him. They're like, yeah, do you wanna go back to Poland and open up some emerging markets? And he was like, yeah, let's do that too. What's interesting is that my older sister, she's a Colonel in the army.
[00:28:04] She's a strong proponent of the suicide awareness programs and she helps create those and fund those. She's hyper successful. She briefed the secretary of defense, I think last week. She was handpicked. She was asked to come brief him.
[00:28:16] Then my brother who's four years younger than me, he's got a travel app, very successful self-made type businessman. I give them all the credit and then I was like, wait, no, I've accomplished a few things too. The central point to that is I think what we accidentally or inadvertently learned by growing up with my father, as he was struggling to find the next job, learn English and not only learn English, learn business English, he taught us that every situation, uh, can go one of two ways. It can go in a positive or negative. Winston Churchill says a pessimist sees a problem in every situation and then an optimist sees an opportunity, right?
[00:28:59] So the theory isn't new, but seeing that embodiment in my father, like, okay, we have $200 and we're gonna figure it out and we're gonna turn every situation into an opportunity and every situation as best as possible into a positive, I think what we as kids learn from him and seeing him struggle and succeed is that if you get it right seven times outta 10, you're still getting it right.
[00:29:24] I laugh because there's a joke. A guy pulls up to a gas station and he sees that the lottery is a million dollars and he's like I wanna win that million dollars. The next day he checks the lottery ticket numbers and he didn't win.
[00:29:37] He's like, oh, okay, maybe I gotta make this better. So he pulls up gas station and he's like, all right, if I win the lottery, I'm gonna give 10% to charity. And so the next day he checks those lottery numbers. He doesn't win. He's like, okay, maybe I gotta make it better.
[00:29:49] So he goes the next day. He's like, if I win the lottery today, I'm gonna give 50% to charity. He doesn't win. So finally, at the end of it, he's like, I just wanna say that I won the lottery. I'll give all a hundred percent of it to charity. Okay. Is that cool? Why won't you let me win the lottery? So God or the non-denominational Jesus, whoever, he reaches down, rips the roof off the car, he looks at the guy and he is like, well, at least go in and buy a ticket.
[00:30:12] I laugh about it, but I realize that a lot of people have the same outlook on life. They're like, I really want that thing. I really want a good job. I really want a nice house. I really want, you know, to whatever, to lose weight, to be healthy, to be financially savvy and set, and they can see the lottery ticket and they can see how much it's worth if they win it. Then they just sit in the car or they're like, ah, it's hot outside, and I've got the AC on in here, you know? Or they get out and they walk across the asphalt and they go into the store and then they just don't buy the lottery ticket or they talk themselves out of the ticket.
[00:30:44] I know it's a lighthearted joke, but what I'm realizing as we're correlating the two is, if you've used that analogies and apply it to life, if you get one out of five things right in life, that's great. Learn from that and next time get two out of five things, right. You know, but like, it's gonna take you getting out of your car and walking across the street of life and walking into the store of life and gambling a little bit in life and saying, yeah, like I might have to take a different job, or I don't like this situation so I need to go figure out a way to, you know, might be uncomfortable to figure out a way, but I need to figure out a way to solve it because that's the problem. You're identifying the problem. And I think what my dad taught us was that walking across into the gas station and getting a lot ticket is part of life.
[00:31:30] You know, go get a lot ticket, get the next lotto ticket, get the next lotto ticket. And, you know, uh, if you invest small, you'll get small. If you invest big, you might win big. He would say this is of one of, one of his funny quotes, he's like uh, the harder I work, the luckier I got.
[00:31:47] People would ask how he got where he did. And he was like, well, I was painting houses and repairing computers. That's not a money maker, but that was my scratch off ticket. And then that, and then bigger and then bigger, then bigger. He taught my sister and my brother and myself if you just try to do the right thing at that moment, um, and you see the positive aspect instead of the pessimistic aspect. You do one positive thing a day for X amount of days, you're going to be better off. Now that we're reflecting on it, I think some people won't even get out of the car. They'll just sit there and be angry that somebody else won a lottery ticket, but that's an opportunity and what you do with that is up to the person.
[00:32:26] Katherine: When you were young as a kid, seeing your family come to America, you only have $200 or so, and then your parents are starting to rebuild their lives, at that point in time, did you see that optimistic attitude? Did you see the behavior in the flesh, so to speak, or is it only now reflecting upon it?
[00:32:48] Jacek: It's only now reflecting on it because no one loves living in a small apartment and eating cold ravioli cuz the microwaves broken or hot dogs, right? There's nothing to love about that. And that's the other thing is if you don't love something about the situation you're in, be creative enough to solve it, right? And so it's like, hey, we don't like this apartment because its small and it's tiny and we don't have any money. It's like, all right, time to make money, time to not spend money, time to get certain certification and work up the ladder.
[00:33:16] The funny thing with perspectives, cause I think that's what we're getting to is, opportunities based on perspective, you have to see the opportunity first to then work towards it. Everybody's heard the glasses half full, glass is half empty. It's not enough just to see that the glass is half full or half empty, but is it being filled up or is it being emptied?
[00:33:36] If you're going through life, emptying your glass, of course it's gonna be half empty but if it's half full it's can only get fuller. Growing up as a kid, cuz we moved around a lot, I think I went to six or eight different schools by the time I was in ninth grade because we're chasing the career ladder that GM had put out in front of my dad, and that could be very pessimistic and frustrated that every year I was leaving and going to different schools and didn't know anybody, but I took a different approach and I was like, well, I'm just moving.
[00:34:08] I'm in Texas and there's Longhorn steer on my backyard, like, that's cool. Let's get to know some cows. I'm in Michigan where I learned to make igloos cuz it snowed every weekend in the winter. So I moved around it, but one of my best friends, uh, I knew him in North Carolina and we were still best friends now as adults. I knew him back in second grade and we love catching up with each other just cuz it's great to hear and share these stories of successes.
[00:34:37] Then nineties rolled around and GMs like do you wanna move to Poland? And we're like, let's go. This is a chance. We don't know what's gonna come of it. No one does. You can't predict that far, but as a teenager I was living life in Europe. I was like, I wanna go snowboarding in Slovakia, like my buddies are going. My dad's like, yeah, go it's only $20 on a train to get there. I'm meeting other Europeans. I think I spent two weeks in Tokyo as a teenager cause my girlfriend at the time used to live there and still had friends.
[00:35:05] So like, all I had to do was buy a plane ticket and I spent weeks there. I could have focused on I'm an American and I don't speak the language fluently or I could say what opportunities exist? Let's focus on the things that I can learn from this situation.
[00:35:18] Let's not focus on the parking lot that I'm gonna have to walk across to get into the store, to buy the lottery ticket. Let's just focus on the lottery ticket and whatever it takes to get there, let's just chalk that up as stuff we have to do to get there. That's what I learned at a very young age and that stuck with me and I, that mapped very much my trajectories in life.
[00:35:38] This one's funny. We were in Germany at the time, a couple of my buddies and I were sitting around talking and were like, hey, they're running with the bulls this weekend in Pamplona and it's only like 50 Euros to fly there. Let's go.
[00:35:50] We go to Pamplona. We run with the bulls and then Spain wins the world cup that night. That's amazing, right? Uh, couldn't have predicted that and we get back to work on Monday and uh, we're like, oh yeah, we ran with the bulls and then we partied in Barcelona.
[00:36:08] We had a newspaper and we're like, look like, you know, it's in the newspaper. We ran out the Bullon, we're looking, I'm like, huh, that's me in the newspaper. I started laughing and now that I'm thinking about it, it's like when you put yourself out there into the adventures of life and you're like, yeah, let's do it. Let's focus on the adventure, on the good that's gonna come of it, like there's a picture proving that it was spontaneous weekend and the bull's jumping over me, you know? And it's like, ha. That could not have been predicted, could not have been planned, and it couldn't be proven cause you're not allowed to take pictures while you're running with the bulls. And now there's proof of it. You're like, huh. It's sort of like fate or someone's congratulating you as you go.
[00:36:47] You're like, yeah, you did the hard thing. Congratulations. You bought that lottery ticket. Not only did you win one lottery ticket, you won two. You're like, oh, well I didn't predict that? Yeah, you're not supposed to predict it. You're just supposed to play the lottery of life and move forward, fall forward, learn from your mistakes.
[00:37:03] There's no such thing as opportunity without the effort, right? No one said it's gonna be easy, no one said you're gonna get there, and no one said that it's guaranteed. You think about any of it, like those propaganda papers hadn't been shoved in my diaper and smuggled into prison for the Solidarity unit to know what they were doing and then smuggle papers out, who knows what would've happened.
[00:37:26] The opportunity was there and someone took that opportunity and they worked hard for it. There are no guarantees, but life is a one way street. You might as well try to win as many a lottery tickets as you can, along the way, right?
[00:37:38] Katherine: Absolutely. It seems like application is the key. I think that's what you're driving at is just get out there, go and do, and you don't know what's gonna happen, but if you don't do that, we absolutely know what's gonna happen. Nothing's gonna happen, right?
[00:37:51] Jacek: Right. Yeah, exactly. If you're playing poker in Vegas and you never put a chip out, you're never gonna be able to play poker. You have to put a chip out, then maybe you win the hand. Maybe you don't win the hand. I think people get into this fear that, oh, this is my only chip. If I put it out and lose what next? It's like, well, if you actually think about it, you have an unlimited pocket of chips because it's your life.
[00:38:15] Like the chips only run out when your life is over, but if you don't take a chip and gamble, just a little bit of discomfort and try to play strategically, and try to win that pot, then you're never gonna make more money. You're just gonna have what you have and that's it. Yeah. The application of effort when you see an opportunity, when you see a chance for adventure or growth or enlightenment.
[00:38:36] I was talking to my kids. They'd lost their iPad the other day. And uh, they're like well it's not here on the couch. What do I do? I was like, well, you just keep looking for it. They looked for it and looked for it and they found it finally, but I think in some ways people tend to do that too. They're like, well my, my solution's not right here in front of me. Where do I go from here? I'm just never going to have an iPad again.
[00:38:58] It's like, or you could just look under the couch or maybe in the bed, or maybe in the car, or maybe in the kitchen, or maybe at your friend's house, like the opportunity, the chance, it exists, you just have to find it. You have to be persistent enough to find it. You have to be persistent at playing the lottery, and just cuz you have one opportunity doesn't mean you've won forever. You have to get the next one, the next one, the next one.
[00:39:19] Also I think what's important is accepting, the fact that you're not gonna capture every opportunity. You're gonna look back like, oh I missed that one. You have to give yourself the grace on not getting it right and saying, okay, I messed this one up, sit back, lick your wounds, objectively, identify why you missed it. Did you not prepare it well enough? Did you not plan well enough? Did you not talk to enough people? Or was the timing just bad? Next time this presents itself, I'll do it again. And I'll try to do it a little better. If I get it, I'm gonna appreciate it that much more.
[00:39:52] Katherine: I think that's the very thing that a lot of people get so scared of is,
[00:39:56] Jacek: mm-hmm
[00:39:56] Katherine: needing it to be right. I need to figure out before I even get out of that car to go purchase that proverbial lotto ticket.
[00:40:03] Jacek: Yeah.
[00:40:03] Katherine: I need to know what kind do I need to buy? How much is it gonna cost me? What are my odds and figure everything out and then I can apply myself and that's backwards. There actually was a study of this group of students. They split 'em in two. They had students who made one clay pot in the span of 30 days. And so they worked on that clay pot over 30 days. Then on the other side, the group of students created a clay pot every single day. So they had 30 clay pots at the end, and then they had an assessment of which one was a higher quality pot and the group that created one every single day for 30 days ended up with the highest quality pot at the end.
[00:40:43] Jacek: Yeah.
[00:40:43] Katherine: So application right, as many times as they can.
[00:40:47] Jacek: Yeah. Yeah. You learn more by doing than by studying to do it. You should always have a general plan of like do I have enough money to get on this plane to go to Spain? But all reasonability aside doing is more important than thinking about doing.
[00:41:04] Once you go through Infantry Airborne, you go to special forces, you go to selection. They threw us on a truck. We had a 50 pound rucksacks and they drop us off in this random intersection in the woods.
[00:41:15] Go that way. You have an undetermined amount of distance to travel over an undetermined amount of time. If you make it at the end of it, you can continue being selected and evaluated. We're like, okay, let's go. And then I see this guy to my side. He's kind of confused.
[00:41:31] We're like, is everything okay? He's like, I thought we were in Special Forces now. We're like, no, no, no. We have to be selected to be in Special Forces. We have to still try. And he's like, oh, he just takes off his rucksack and sits down. He's like, yeah, that's too much work. And we're like, oh, oh, okay, well, you made your decision. We're gonna go.
[00:41:49] And so going, we went and 250, 300 miles later over the course of like two, three weeks. I mean, my feet were bloody and you've lost like 10 pounds and you've seen some of the strongest people, they call it self selection is when you have so much internal doubt that you're just like, nope, I can't make this anymore. I can't do it.
[00:42:06] You'd be like, but you're in much better health. You have zero blisters. I have like eight, and they're this big. They're on my feet. My feet are bleeding, you know, but you're like, okay, well that person has made their decision. My decision is to continue going and I will continue going and, uh, that's the effort, right?
[00:42:22] You have to keep trying and back to the clay pot analogy, you have to try every day for 30 days and you'll get somewhere. If you just show up and say, hey, today's the day I make it. You're like, ah, did you try, did you work to get here? People are gonna battle instant gratification with effort and there's that frustration cuz a lot of people want the instant gratification without the effort. Now I sound like an old person saying this but the more I reflect on life is I've never achieved anything in life that I didn't apply for. That translates into, we have to go all in on making this clay pot today and make it the best we can today. It doesn't have to be the best tomorrow. It doesn't have to be the best from yesterday. But using, using your analogy is yeah, the best one today, the best we can do today. Sometimes that's all it takes and then you'll get to the next day cause time's linear, time goes forward.
[00:43:11] Katherine: Well, one thing I'm hearing in your story is you had people let's say who didn't have blisters and you have eight blisters.
[00:43:18] Jacek: Mm-hmm
[00:43:18] Katherine: We could classify that as you are having a more challenging experience than they are. And I've heard before that sometimes people who come from more challenging pasts, they have what it takes to push forward to greater opportunities. Now, I don't think that's necessarily true all the time,
[00:43:36] Jacek: mm-hmm
[00:43:37] Katherine: but it does create a little bit of a character that is willing to dig in deep, willing to have that grittiness and push through. How important do you think having challenges in life is for obtaining opportunities?
[00:43:51] Jacek: There's a balance, like you said, with within reasonability, right? Because the person's mind is always learning, it's like going to the gym. If you go to the gym one day and you say, today's the day I'm gonna work out and lift a thousand pounds, you're not gonna get anywhere cause it's impossible. But if you say today's the day I'm gonna lift what I can lift and I'll add 10 pounds to it tomorrow. That's the challenge, that's the difficulty, and I'm gonna add 10 pounds the next week and 10 pounds the next week. You add difficulty in a workout to get stronger, right? Same in life. An easy life doesn't actually teach you anything. It accelerates your chances to have an existential crisis because you're like, life is so easy. What's my purpose?
[00:44:33] And then you're like, oh, well your purpose is to find challenge. You're like, ah, no, I don't know if I like challenge cuz I've had such an easy life. But conversely there are terrible things in this world and if that life or that person is put under too much pressure it's same as if they were at the gym, they would tear muscle or hurt their back and that could be a little lifelong injury. So yeah, there's absolutely truth to the idea of either voluntarily putting yourself into challenging situations or finding yourself in challenging situations and then not quitting and continuing through it.
[00:45:07] There was nothing easy about growing up as an immigrant with a funny name, like Jacek in North Carolina, in Tennessee or in Texas. They're like Jacek? Where's that from? Are you foreigner? I'm like, uh, I'm American because I was naturalized, but that's still my name.
[00:45:24] Trying to find yourself in that and move forward, it was never catastrophic, but it was always challenging, but then once anybody shifts their perspective and says, yeah, it's challenging, but what am I learning from it?
[00:45:34] It's difficult, but what am I learning today from it? How will tomorrow be better? Being honest with yourself. You get to a point where if you don't like the situation, what fortunately you've done is you've created a catalog of life skills where you're like, oh, I can, I can move tomorrow.
[00:45:47] That's okay. I'll move from here to there and people are like, how are you gonna do that? That sounds scary. You're like, no, I've moved like every year for my past 10 years. I'm just gonna pack my bags and jump on a Greyhound. This is nothing, you know?
[00:45:59] Difficult things can train you to solve more difficult things, but there is a balance, like you said, um, it's too difficult, it's crushing, but if it's too easy, it doesn't teach you anything.
[00:46:11] Katherine: When you were a kid, it feels like you got a sense for that. You changed your perspective. Was that, how did you come to that conclusion? Was it something that moved within you? Was it the lessons from your family, the modeling from your dad?
[00:46:30] Jacek: I was 8, 9, 10. I was still a young kid, so I don't think I had the maturity to look at my dad and be like, oh, that man's gonna teach me something and I'm gonna learn it right now. Within me, it was just this real simple question of like, I'm moving. Who do I want be and what do I want to achieve next? Um, cause I had the ability to be basically like a social chameleon. I would leave in the middle of a school year and show up at, you know, next school and be like, I could be whoever I wanna be. These people don't know who I am. You know, I can be the shy guy. I can be the extravagant guy. I can be the guy's just mine's his own business cuz I'm probably gonna be moving next year anyway. I had every reason to be frustrated, but what I was learning is that I didn't want to live in frustration.
[00:47:18] If you have a choice to be frustrated or not frustrated, it only makes sense to choose what's gonna make you happier. I learned how to know people very quickly. I learned how to make friends very quickly. There was obviously the struggle of learning how to do that because you're with a bunch of kids who've been with each other forever, lived in the same neighborhood, same house, and I'm the new. It's like how do I get to know that group of friends?
[00:47:39] How do I avoid those people you know, cause they're gonna beat me up. I think instinctively learned and then intentionally, uh, designed myself to be able to see those things and then move quickly between those groups. And I mean, in high school I could just move in between each group, very fluidly. I walked up to them as if they were the humans that they were. I didn't approach them with any preconceptions. I was like, hey, how's it going? Hey, you're having a problem with that group. What's going on? Okay, cool. Don't do that, but do do this. I'd make sure the school is as balanced as possible because I was building out my own situation. I wanted the school to be happy, go lucky and everybody having a good time cuz that was a choice, like, hey, let's, let's just make sure everybody gets along. Like it's, it's easy. It's easy to get along. Like we'll just squash little fights before they happen.
[00:48:31] I mean, now that we're, I'm talking about it has clearly spilled over into my adult life. Uh, but yeah. Somewhere in there, uh, there was absolutely a conscious decision to say, I have a choice. I have a choice of being frustrated, or I have a choice of trying to find the best in the situation and learn from that. I modeled it to fit what I needed it to do.
[00:48:56] Katherine: I love that you have that epiphany!
[00:48:58] Jacek: Yeah. That's I thinking about this was like, wait a second. As I'm talking about this, I'm realizing that, that this is hilarious.
[00:49:05] Katherine: I was like, wow, there's so many parallels between his childhood and his work. And then you said, I think I'm having an epiphany.
[00:49:11] And I was like, oh, that's awesome. So for anyone who is just stuck, they have a ton of self doubt, feel like they don't have resources. What, what am I gonna bring to the table? What am I good at? How am I supposed to create an opportunity? How do I even start?
[00:49:32] Jacek: I've been in those situations where you have a great idea or you have a great desire and you're like, I just don't even know and if you overthink it, then you'll give yourself anxiety cause you're like, oh, there's so many things to do, I can't possibly do 'em all today. The answer is you're absolutely correct. There's no way you're gonna get it done today and you're not supposed to get it done today. It's impossible to get it done today. So don't set yourself up to do it, but what you can set yourself up for is look for other people who've done it. It is amazing how much information is in a book.
[00:50:07] I mean, I read Richard Branson's, all of his interviews, his autobiographies, Tony Robbins. You get this collection of knowledge of how other people have done it because they've done it and they want to then share how they've done it because they're eternal optimists and somewhere in there is the answer.
[00:50:26] Give yourself the grace that you're not gonna figure it out all today and then say, hey, I'm going to look at other people who've done it and I'm just gonna study them. I'm gonna read a book. That's your effort. That's you getting outta the car. Then you putting the effort of changing something that you're doing to model towards the targets or the goal that you want, which is the theoretical lottery ticket.
[00:50:49] Because Tony Robbins and Richard Branson and even Elon Musk and Jeff Bezos, you have people who are going to criticize them, right, but those are the people that are sitting in the car, pointing at the other people, going into the lottery store and being like, oh, look at those people. They're never gonna win. I'm gonna judge them from the inside of my car.
[00:51:09] Why are you going to give them grief for putting themselves out there? I mean, Elon Musk, uh, has probably done more for the energy market and the electric car market than anybody, but there's still people who are like, oh yeah, but there's this one thing that he did. You're like, look, he's still human, he's still gonna have flaws. Learn from him and then more importantly, I just wanna turn to that person, I'm like, what are you doing with your life? Are you trying to make electric cars? Are you trying to put solar panels on things? Are you trying to make battery banks and are you sending satellites and are you exploring the world or are you just sitting in your car complaining?
[00:51:53] Tying it back to the simplest of ideas is if you are stuck somewhere, give yourself the grace and say, yeah, you're stuck. Don't beat yourself up, admit to yourself, give yourself that grace, say I'm stuck. Just say it. It's like taking the lid off of pot of boiling pasta. If you don't say it, then you're just gonna bubble and shake, but if you take that off, you're gonna let some steam off and you're like, okay, okay, I can see the pasta now. Okay. It's not that bad. And then say, what do I want to achieve? And who else has achieved it? Then I'm just gonna learn from them because they've already gone that way. They've already learned those things. I'm gonna make sure that I am not sitting there criticizing them for having achieved what they've achieved cuz everybody has a different journey. Everybody has a different start point. Everybody has a different day one. But if you don't take that first step, and if you don't take that first effort, you're never gonna have a day two. You're just gonna be stuck in that car complaining.
[00:52:45] I sympathize with people who are stuck because I was stuck. I had my first midlife crisis when I was 20. I realized I was going bald. I can either have really bad receding hairline or I can shave my head and I turn to my sister. She's like, what do you wanna do? I'm like, I don't know. You tell me what to do. She's like alright [shaving noise]. I'm like, I guess I'm shaving my head from here on out.
[00:53:05] So seek advice from somebody else knowing that sometimes they may not give you the best advice, but you know, start asking questions like, hey, have you ever been in this situation? Hey, this is what I'm gonna walk into. Hey, I feel stuck. Um, I'm frustrated. I'm unhappy with my situation. I think some people when they're stuck in a situation, they try to tell themselves, no, no, I need to just learn to be okay with this. You're like, no, that's not the purpose of realizing that you're unhappy.
[00:53:31] The purpose of realizing you're unhappy is to motivate you, to make yourself happy cuz being happy is a choice. And so yeah, my kids are very unhappy when they're they lose their iPad and they're very happy when they find it because they've put it the effort to find it. They don't want to just sit around and be unhappy.
[00:53:48] There's a significant degree of choice and personal responsibility to solving the problem directly in front of you, and then you can solve the next bigger problem, and then the next bigger problem. So the short answer is give yourself grace, seek help, do research, try, just try.
[00:54:04] Like you said, do those 30 clay pots. Okay. Don't focus so hard on that one perfect clay pot, because no one's gonna do that. Your team's gonna fall apart at day 20 cause you've not made a clay pot yet. You guys are all sharing the same anxiety and that's just not how you know, human body and spirit and effort in life is engineered. It's engineered to go out and try. I've given you a very long answer to a very simple question, but I feel very passionate about that. That was good, good on your part.
[00:54:34] Katherine: Me too, and I just think one of the easiest entry points for anyone, it doesn't matter how much money, if you're in a small apartment, you're in a mansion, you're in the middle of your life and you feel like you haven't done anything, you don't know what your purpose is, go someone else and say, what can I do better?
[00:54:50] Jacek: It takes humility to accept that advice because no one wants to be told that they are deficient in something, you know? And so yeah, you have to be ready for that.
[00:55:00] Katherine: I think another issue that we have in society is we take anyone who has been successful and we put 'em up on a pedestal and then sometimes when they're on the pedestal we'll try and tear them down, but not to bring them back to our level, but just to tear them down.
[00:55:15] Jacek: Mm-hmm
[00:55:15] Katherine: When we put 'em on a pedestal, it increases the distance between where we are and where they are. And it makes the journey feel incredibly long versus realizing the simplicity. If you want to walk a path, you have to start with that first step.
[00:55:32] Jacek: Yeah.
[00:55:32] Katherine: And so if you are looking to get wherever they are, just take a step and, and people say, okay, great. So I took a step now what? Like, I'm still so far from X, Y, and Z person or X, Y, and Z goal.
[00:55:45] Jacek: Yeah.
[00:55:46] Katherine: And yet I think you and I can relate and we understand we've gotten to where we are because we just kept taking steps.
[00:55:54] Jacek: Life takes effort and energy and it's not gonna be found sitting on a couch, you know, or sitting in a car. That's a beautiful way to put it.
[00:56:02] Katherine: When you have reached out to someone or you took that next step, or you applied yourself in a way, and that leads to the next opportunity and then the next, and then the next and things are building, how do you know when you've maximized an opportunity and it's time to pivot and start looking for opportunities somewhere else?
[00:56:23] Jacek: That's a hard question to answer. I took one job. I was in North Carolina. This was my transition after college but before going back into the Army. I answered this ad. It pays $20 an hour and you milk cows. And I'm like, oh, okay, cool. So I show up to this farm field, the farmer looks at me. He is like, I don't even know why you're here. And I'm like, what do you mean? He's like, you're not gonna ever do this job.
[00:56:45] I was like, okay, that's fine. The mud's up to your ankles and it just smells like manure and I'm like, okay, but I've never milked a cow. Like you're absolutely right, Farmer Joe, I don't want this job and I'm agreeing with you, but I've never milked a cow. So can I milk a cow for like a shift?
[00:57:00] He's like, yeah, that's the weirdest thing I've ever heard, but do it. And uh, so I just started milking cows, putting up the section cups and just being covered in slop, but being honest with yourself and saying, this is absolutely not what I want right now. This isn't the job that I'm gonna force myself to take.
[00:57:16] What I found myself doing, being very honest with myself, with work and with positions of work and places I go to it's like, no, this isn't, this isn't right. I'm listening to myself and this is absolutely not what I want to do or this isn't the way it should be done.
[00:57:31] And then I look around and I'm like, well, no one else is fixing it. So I'm going to try to fix it and make it better. When you've got that internal monologue within yourself, it's about giving yourself the grace and the honesty, um, to say, that's not what I want to do anymore.
[00:57:46] I encourage this with my boys. I'm like, well, if you don't like it, change it, fix it or move on. It's such simple advice and I'm telling that to a nine year old and a seven year old, but I'm seeing adults do the same thing. There was a brief stint where I was an accountant right before joining the Army. I sat down and started doing accounting numbers and I'm like, well, no, this isn't gonna work for me and it was paying these phenomenal amount of money. I turned through the guy next to me who I just met. I'm like, how long have you been doing this? He's like, oh, like couple years. I'm like, and you like it? He's like, no, I hate it. I'm like, why would you choose to do that then? And time comes by and I'm like, yeah, I'm leaving and they're like, well, you just started. I was like, yeah, but this isn't what I wanna do. My life is more important than this job.
[00:58:28] You only have one life and it's gonna be long or short and you have no control over that. So might as well make all of it as satisfying and as useful as possible. There is no easy answer other than if you don't like it, find something that you do like. If you get stuck, ask for help, there's people out there that'll help you.
[00:58:47] Katherine: How do you pick a direction? Is it important to have a mission statement? Do you need to know your purpose or is it just pick one, go with it, get feedback from life, from the world, from inside yourself?
[00:59:00] Jacek: Yeah. I've never been a very smart learner. I'm a doer learner, so I have to go forward and stumble and be like, oh I guess I gotta learn how to walk, you know?
[00:59:11] I'm like, oh, well, so, so this is good, but this is bad, you know, it's simple binary solution. I'm gonna go this way and you get there and you're like, okay, that's good, that's good, that's better. I'm gonna go better. I think a mission statement can be overwhelming. I've worked or trained with over 1.2 and a half thousand foreign troops or other people in different cultures, in different languages, under many different circumstances. I've learned a lot about them, but I've also learned a lot about myself in the process. You do that long enough you're gonna answer some questions that you didn't know you had. Uh, but fundamentally, most people only have one or two core motivations. They only have one or two core identities. Everything else is a construct around that. At least for me, what is my core motivation? What is my core identity?
[00:59:57] I need to figure it out so I'm gonna go out into a situation. I'm going to discover how I feel in that situation. I'm gonna step back. And I'm like, oh, I like that about me or I don't like that about me. Being honest with yourself and saying, what did you like, what didn't you like? What embarrassed you? Where did you succeed? Where were you happiest? What were you proud of? Why were you proud of it and answering these really mushy questions and then dial you in to identify what you wanna do in life and how you want to get there and how you may want to get there.
[01:00:23] I think for a lot of different people, it's gonna be a little different ways. Uh, the way I knew it for me is I'm gonna go out and I'm gonna do as much as I can in life while I'm still young enough to do it. I traveled a lot. I mean, and we're talking, like I threw a backpack on and I got a Greyhound and I went to Canada, to visit friends out there for a month. Like, it doesn't have to be these like luxurious travel things. It's just, you just have to get there.
[01:00:48] My buddy once flew over from Poland and we jumped in my pickup truck, started in Knoxville, Tennessee, drove to DC all the way up to Canada, through Toronto, all the way to Kansas, all the way to Tijuana, from Tijuana, we drove all the way up to Seattle. From Seattle we went through Omaha and Nebraska's and ended up back in Knoxville, Tennessee, and the instantly rolled back into the parking spot my odometer clicked 10,000 miles and he and I look at each other, we're like, I'm glad we're young cause I can't do that again when we're old. We learn, we visited friends along the way, we had great adventure, but that's the point. If you don't put yourself into a situation, you're never gonna learn who you are. If you're too scared to push yourself out of your comfort zones, you're never gonna learn where you can grow. I could have been doing landscaping or milking cows. I prefer the life I have now.
[01:01:40] Katherine: I have this theory that if everyone went through this process and just identified, what do I like? What do I not like? And drew stronger boundaries around that, said no to more things,
[01:01:51] Jacek: Yeah.
[01:01:51] Katherine: that we would have accountants who would be milking cows and people who are milking cows, who would be lawyers or whatever. Everyone would have this shuffle and I feel like we're going through that a little bit, but it's so important for people to be honest and everything would still get done. People would just rearrange and I feel like people would be a lot more satisfied with it.
[01:02:10] Jacek: There's some great people out there that should be doing and following their passions, like congratulations to you for launching this podcast, for example. I have no idea how to launch a podcast, but I imagine there were more than a few steps and you've done it and you're doing it, right? Like that's a huge win. There's probably 50,000 people behind you being like, oh, I wanna launch a podcast, but I don't know what microphone to use, or I wanna launch a podcast, but I don't know who I'd interview first. And you're like, no one knows who they're gonna interview first.
[01:02:43] You interview anybody. You find an interesting person, you do this, you do this, you do this, you do this. And you know, you, you played your lottery ticket, right? You said, this is a ticket I wanna play and you know, this is, this is the amazing outcome of it. I'm honored to be on it so thank you. I get to share my story. I get to have my own personal epiphanies so you've translated the gift to me which is great.
[01:03:07] I think that's what a lot of people maybe mistake is that doing things in a positive way, brings more positivity, not just to the person, but to other people. My micro gift for the day is realizing that I've been running a very interesting life of adventure and on multiple scales.
[01:03:26] Katherine: Thank you Jacek. It has been such a pleasure to have you on here, and honestly, I mean, you hit the nail on the head. The only reason why you and I are able to have this conversation is because you said yes, and because someone extended the invitation to you and on my end, because I knew someone who knew someone and so it's these little things. Just reach out, just communicate, say yes, say no to the things you don't want, be willing, put yourself out there. They're very simple, but it makes a huge difference and over time, we're able to positively impact each other and share those gifts as you were mentioning.
[01:04:00] So yes, it's my pleasure to have you here.
[01:04:03] Jacek: Well thank you.
[01:04:05] Katherine: Yeah. As we close out here, what is some advice you would give to your younger self?
[01:04:11] Jacek: Oh, um, keep going. There are plenty of times where I doubted myself completely and I stopped. I don't know if you know the air fresheners that you see in like bathrooms and whatnot that like are on a timer? I invented that in like the 1990s. I was like, we have cats, cats are stinky. I should put a timer with an air freshener so it does this and I proposed this to somebody and somebody said, that's silly. Manufacturing that would be so if I'm like, okay, I'm just gonna throw this away. Every time I see one of those air fresheners I remind myself that no, like sometimes the only person that will believe in you is you. Be able to take advice, but also realize that if it's your dream, you have full responsibility of seeing it through.
[01:05:02] You're gonna get it right more times than you're not, follow your heart, make things better as you go and just keep going. It's a great life out there.
[01:05:13] Katherine: You're carrying on the legacy of your father and your mother as well and their courage and their journey. What legacy do you hope your children carry on from you?
[01:05:23] Jacek: Oh, that's too much pressure to put on a kid or somebody else. So the only thing I want them to do is follow their heart, know how to be good people and make something better. That's it. There's no other, no, no other legacy or pressure that I would ever put on them. Like I'm proud of them already as nine and seven year olds. They're phenomenal kids. Just keep doing what they're doing and I'm gonna be happy for the rest of my life.
[01:05:49] Katherine: When someone hears make something better, at least for me, it's like, okay, I have to change the world. I have to solve world hunger. Wow. This feels big. How small can make something better be?
[01:06:01] Jacek: It can be something as simple as just giving somebody a compliment. I remember I was in Poland. I had a rough day at school and I was walking back home and some babushka comes up and she's walking, but then she veers out of her way to come up to me and she's like, hey, this is all I Polish, like, you are too young to be this unhappy. Everything's gonna be okay and she gave me a hug and then she went on her way. I still remember that. That happened when I was like 14, you know, I'm 40 now. And I'm like, huh, that made me feel great and it continues to make me feel great.
[01:06:37] So if I can walk down the street and just tell somebody hello, or hey, that joke you said the other day, that was a really great joke. Or like, hey, I might not have all the answers right now, but I'm willing to help. How can I help?
[01:06:48] I'm just one person. I can't solve world hunger. What I can do is say, thank you for cooking this dinner. Thank you for giving me a ride. Thank you for remembering to call me on my birthday. Little things. And it's not just about receiving it's about pushing out. If you could push out positivities, like things get better real quick, but if you just absorb the negativities and don't push anything positive out, like yeah, there's, there's nothing good. Glass half empty or is it half full?
[01:07:15] It depends on which way it's being filled or emptied. Don't aim to solve world hunger, cuz nobody's going to as a one person band, but tell somebody something nice once in a while. And that might be the nicest thing they've heard all day, if not their life.
[01:07:30] Katherine: Wow, that's beautiful. And it's so true. It is super, super true just the impact, that being kind and seeing someone, hearing someone taking a moment mm-hmm to be present with them can make a really big difference. What is the last thing you'd like to leave with listeners?
[01:07:46] Jacek: Thank you to you for giving me this opportunity. This was a wonderful time and thank you.
[01:07:52] Katherine: You're so welcome. Thank you for being here. Thank you for sharing your incredible stories and wisdom around creating opportunity. Some of the most simple things in life really are where the wisdom lies and where the keys to achieving our dreams and being successful is and I really appreciate you joining me. Jacek is there a way that people can connect with you?
[01:08:15] Jacek: Storiesbyjacek.com.
[01:08:17] Katherine: If there is one way that people could help you, what would it be?
[01:08:22] Jacek: Oh, I would much rather appreciate people taking care of themselves, giving themselves the grace that I think a lot of us are forgetting to give and then giving grace to other people. Just give them room and see them and thank them and make them feel like you said, make them feel heard and present.
[01:08:42] Katherine: When we take care of ourselves, it eases pressure from other people, and everyone is a spider web, right? So you're just one strand in that spider web. You don't know who all the other strands are and so by easing that tension and being a little bit kinder to yourself and those around you, if those people then take care of themselves that continues to ripple out. Similarly, is there any way that you can support other people? What should they reach out to you for?
[01:09:09] Jacek: I would be more than happy to help anybody in whatever practical way that I can. I'd be more than happy to work on projects or efforts or mentorships, or even just having a good conversation over coffee. I'm here to be useful. We all have limited time in this planet and more useful I can be the better.
[01:09:27] Katherine: To everyone out there, thank you for listening to the Opportunity Made Podcast. It really is a pleasure to meet and spend time with good friends and share new ways that we can all create opportunity in the world. That's really what this is all about. So if this podcast has inspired you, please let me know at Opportunity Made on social media and let's continue this conversation. Who knows what kind of opportunities are going to come from this. You can check out the show notes, www.opportunitymade.com. Serve widely, give greatly, and take care y'all.