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We are a podcast that aims to provide raw, real conversations about deep topics that concern a Christ-centered lifestyle.
We want to go where no one else wants to go, and we want to showcase conversations and topics that are not easily discussed. We do this by going in depth and providing a well thought and expressed conversation about these topics.
John
Welcome to supernatural breakthroughs, where we have real, raw and unfiltered conversations about our Christ centered spiritual journeys. Discover mystical stories told by truth seekers on their many spiritual quests. We trust that these stories will help you on your own personal journey of discovery. Okay, so ultimate peace is a gift. Well, this is going to be fun. I can already feel it, already into it here. So let's begin this one with endless doing versus a revelation of love, of beingness. So perhaps let's kick it off with when were in the new age, what were all the endless things that were doing to become enlightened, to become highly evolved, ascended, etcetera. So what were some of the things you guys were caught up in doing in terms of practices and the mindset even behind those practices, for me for.
01:06
Hanka
Sure, was practicing Reiki to help and heal others because my heart was at ease fully to serve others. So I tried to find ways how I can be the most efficient and then also anything to do with and meditation and dancing and to bring the balance into my soul.
01:31
John
When you came from a very competitive, if that's the right word, background, you.
01:35
Hanka
Were very striving all about achieving achievements daily because I really tried to belong in here, to this world to be enough. So I was really thriving from the place of not being enough because of, from the family that I was brought up as well, trying to get attention from my mom, who was 15 years in depression. So it was like my pattern. Your pattern was coded in my DNA since a little girl. Yeah.
02:08
John
So that naturally trickled across in your new age practices and all the different things from there?
02:13
Hanka
Absolutely, absolutely.
02:16
John
Got it. Got it. Jawal. How about for you?
02:19
Joao
Well, for me it was mostly regular psychedelics and ceremonies that I used to go. So I used to go at least on a monthly basis. But I think in the peak of my seeking times, I was really doing it almost weekly or every two weeks, intense psychedelic doses. And this would, for me, it was like balancing out and finding out who I am. And then, I mean, in my daily life as well, I had a lot of Palo Santo, which is this incense from the jungle that you would burn. And I used it to clean my space and to clean the room, to clean myself. So it was just an ongoing set of practices of constantly purifying myself and balancing myself.
02:58
John
But what was the mindset behind it? Was it like I'm, you know, if I just do enough of this ritual, ceremonies become more. What was the mindset there?
03:09
Joao
Yeah, good question. So the mindset for me at the time was really that I was on a path to, in a way, merging with light. And so these plants, I would use them to open up my body, open up my energetical body, my spiritual body and physical body to receive more wisdom, more light. So kind of they were doorways into. Yeah, just higher states of light and bliss. And my belief behind them was that these plans would get me there quicker.
03:38
John
So if I just keep going, more ceremonies, more of this. More of this. And you did many ceremonies, many, many medicines.
03:44
Joao
Anyways.
03:44
John
Yeah, it would just get me somewhere to that point.
03:48
Joao
Yeah.
03:48
John
Would you say there was an unrest, like, similar to hunker? There was an unrest within that?
03:52
Joao
There was definitely an unrest, because this is the tricky thing, is that I actually had blissful and deep experiences, but then those were always the high points, and I'd always be striving to reach that point again. And when I couldn't, it would cause an unease and an unrest, and I kept taking more and more.
04:08
John
Okay, okay, interesting. How about for your sister?
04:12
Mariana
Well, for me, I was on a path trying to figure out who am I? So this question was like daily on a research, trying to come into this enlightenment point of being free of this not fitting on the world. I wasn't able to fit on the world at all. So I was trying to figure out more and more about who am I in spirit. And at the end of it, I was with this hope of being enlightened. And in the meantime, because I wasn't able to feed on the world, I was smoking weed to calm down my mind and searching about the truth. So I was in this mix, in this balance between very quiet moments of peace and rest while I was enjoying myself on these deep state of being in this business.
05:08
Mariana
But when I was coming into my daily life, I was struggling so much and I was figuring out so much of the lies of the world that the only thing that was able to calm my mind was really smoking weeds. So that was a big addiction for myself.
05:24
John
Wow. Yeah. And within that, I know you practiced for years this silent meditations, this is ness. When you were part of Muji's discipleship, was there this feeling for you of, I've got to keep going, doing this to kind of get somewhere? Did it feel like that?
05:44
Hanka
Yes.
05:44
Mariana
That was the point. So each day I was feeling on myself that, tomorrow I'll be there. Tomorrow I'll be there. Tomorrow I'll be there. Because I was going on this path to coming to this ultimate point of being enlightened. So, yes, but that point I did had some glimpse of these good ecstasy moments, pleasuring moments, but they were very unpermanent.
06:10
John
Yeah, got it. For myself, I mean, I'm sure there's a lot more. We can all expand on this. But for myself, to keep it succinct, it was a constant quest for knowledge that had actual effects in terms of helping my clients that I worked with and myself, because I have to become the embodiment of that. So when I was working with, whether it's high end athletes or other spiritual leaders, helping, mentoring them on a personal level, business level, professional levels, in different arenas and contexts, I had to always find a way to heal that particular blockage, trauma, upgrade that mindset, how do we dissolve that anxiety? I had clients right before major tournaments on huge arenas around the world having panic attacks. You know, I've got 15 minutes to help dissolve that so they can go out and perform.
07:02
John
And so you're always under this pressure, which I enjoyed because it made me sharp to get results for the people that I worked with. And within that there was this endless. Because there's endless problems in the world, endless clients with endless unique scenarios. And every so often you come cross a client that you couldn't help to the level that you wanted to, and then that puts a fire in you to find another protocol, method, understanding, to kind of help. So it was this endless quest which had a lot of meaning and purpose. It was beautiful in many regards, because you're helping a lot of people, but there was also this endlessness to it, this endless quest for knowledge. And I would say that was my north star at the time of, if I can just get more knowledge.
07:54
John
And I paid, I got access to the best mentors in the world, traveled around the world to work and learn and grow and test. And then it wasn't until. And we're going to move into that in a moment, an encounter with Jesus, that I experienced something that completely dwarfed all that knowledge in terms of power and peace. Hunka, I want to come to one of the stories you were sharing earlier when you were on magic mushrooms and you had a being SAy something to you could have EVen BEEN SATAN or the devil. What happened there?
08:30
Hanka
That's a great question. It was actually one week before it already knew what I'm going to experience in the magic mushrooms, because in magic mushrooms I encountered Jesus Christ. But it wanted to threaten me and wanted to. To really suppress me in my soul. So basically I was sleeping in a sleeping state. He took me out of my body and seated me in the desert, on a seat.
08:55
John
So you're seeing this in a vision?
08:57
Hanka
In a dream.
08:58
John
In a dream, yeah.
09:00
Hanka
And he asked me a question that I would like to hear from my father, and he was asking me, so, what do you think? How are you doing?
09:14
John
So how are you doing in your life journey or whatever?
09:17
Hanka
Yeah, exactly. And I was thinking, I'm doing so well, so I was starting to tell him all THEse GReat things that I'm doing. And, you know, I was getting initiated by the guru and the shaman, and I have something great in me, the light that I carry, and I'm trying to figure out and already practicing in the mindset, coaching the clients, also doing reiki, healing, people getting healed and so on. And I was so proud of myself, and it was all based on myself not even realizing it, because my focus and I purely believed that I was actually all what I was doing is to serve humanity, that there's a purpose for my life. Got it.
10:10
John
So there's that. And then when what happened?
10:16
Hanka
So it was a trap, and it's a huge trap, especially for myself from the background of being an endless achiever. And before I came out of the world, I'm in this magic mushroom experience, and I'm experiencing this tremendous fear, and I'm like, what's going on in here? I thought, I'm in the right path with myself, in the right soul path, and I have the control over my life. That's what I believed.
10:52
John
And this being mocked, you. I remember you telling me the story kind of when you shared, I'm doing so well. Then there was this mockery.
10:59
Hanka
Yes, there was this very specific mockery, having a laughter over my soul, over my being. And it was a very specific laughter. That moment he got me, he trapped me into the deepest parts inside the earth. You could call it as the beginning of the hell. It's like you go down from the pipeline and.
11:25
John
Yeah, okay, so it was in that moment you were, like, trapped because you were in the self, even though in your mind you're doing all these beautiful things, you're helping people. Reiki mindset coaching, la lada. And then. But it's from you. And then because of that, this being. Laugh. As if I've got you and your soul was kind of trapped in a dimension.
11:43
Hanka
Yes, exactly.
11:44
John
So fast forward a little bit of time, like, I think it's a week or so. You take large doses of psilocybin, magic mushrooms, and you go through a pretty intense experience.
11:57
Hanka
Yes.
11:58
John
But hope comes through. Tell us about that.
12:00
Hanka
Yes, so the word hope was whispered to me. So how do I got there? I experienced a tremendous fear, and I could not control it with my mind, with my being. It was beyond of my own capacity, exactly like it was with that being, you could call it. I believe it was Satan who had this laughter over me. And I could not control myself there as well. So I realized there's something beyond of myself. But I knew there is both sides to the coin. There is a fear, and there is a Love. Where is the Love? Because I was in a very rabbit hole in that moment. And then suddenly, the word hope got whispered. And in that moment, the blanket of peace came up on me, and the atmosphere completely changed from the fear to the light. I never forget that. Never.
12:59
John
Amazing. And again, for the listeners, we're not. We're here telling raw stories. That's what we do. We're not advocating go take magic Mushrooms. We're just saying this is Hunker's story. This is what's happened. And we want to be able to tell that unfiltered as it is. And so, Hunker, fast forward after that, you get baptized, and then you felt something. Tell me about that.
13:24
Hanka
Yeah, after the magic mushrooms, I would actually like to share. I went through a big battle, warfare because of experiencing Jesus Christ, but I was not baptized yet. And I did not know what it would feel like, what it means to be baptized. A couple of months later, I got baptized.
13:43
John
And this is with water.
13:45
Hanka
A water bottle in the water, yes. And I never knew who Holy Spirit is. I just had a concept about Holy Spirit. And that moment, I felt the enemy's wrath. But the moment when I got baptized, and the waves were huge. I will never forget how my friend Brandon and yourself, John, you were there to baptize me, and you got a big hit from the wave. But I was still standing there, and you guys were just almost off from me. I never did it.
14:20
John
In the ocean.
14:21
Hanka
Yes, in the ocean. And I was standing there like a firm, like a rock, and I was like, are we doing this or what? What's going on? And the moment when they baptized me, I felt the wrath of the enemy. It was not happy. And when I came up on the waters, wow. The contentment of my soul, the hope that was whispered to me in the magic mushroom experience, the hope means the anchor of the soul. And that moment, I really experience what means to be anchored. Your soul is content in him, through him. That peace that came upon me. And after that, it started to grow bigger and bigger because I became less. It was less about my doings. To serve the love, to reserve the love.
15:14
John
We're feeling that here. Hey. All right. Wow. Peace. Wow. Where were we? I'm a bit whacked by the peace that we just felt. Joel, you were also showing that when you got baptized, you felt this deep peace.
15:30
Joao
Yeah.
15:31
John
How was that for you?
15:32
Joao
So, I had already been walking with Christ for one year, so it took a long time to get baptized. On the day that I finally went, I felt everything inside me come up. So much hurt and pain and anxiety, and I was feeling it all. I was feeling it all, like a bubble of heaviness. And then finally, it's my turn to get baptized. And then my pastor at the time, he puts me in the water. And the moment I go in the water, it's like that little point, split second. Everything washed away, and I felt it being washed away from my body, that cloud. And when I came up, I felt like a huge river of light, and peace was flowing through me, but it was a very deep peace as well.
16:19
Joao
I was really connected to my inmost being, to the spirit, and I could really feel really harmonious in all of my being. And the whole day was beautiful. I was just in this slow flow of joy, this river of joy and peace that just followed me the whole day. Yeah.
16:35
John
And the amazing thing with this, I also had something similar when. When I got baptized in the ocean, I felt this. It was very quiet. It was very still, this deep peace, just. Whoa, what was that? That's something that's not based on our achievements or any of the things we're going to do, all the spiritual work we're going to do, or how good we are, bad we are. This is a peace that's been anchored in the soul, to great expression, hunger that is gifted to me. It's gifted from love. And then it liberates you over time, from the exhaustion of the self, the endless doing, the endless analysis, the endless striving that is fatiguing and tiring. And it's this love and this peace that carries you home to your father in heaven as you walk this journey on this earth. It's deep. It's liberating.
17:35
John
Mariana, you were sharing some scriptures before where Jesus talks about the peace that he gives us.
17:42
Mariana
Yes. Because the subject of this conversation is this ultimate peace. That is a gift.
17:50
Hanka
Right?
17:51
Mariana
And so on the scripture, we can read that Christ says, like, this peace I leave to you, I give to you as living to you, not as the world give to you. So don't be afraid and do not allow your heart to be disturbed. So by this we can realize and we can have really, this more than an experience is really something that come and settle on us. Definitely in terms of spirituality, we receive it by faith, because all of this is just by faith as well. So we receive grace of God is here, but for us to receive whatever he has to give to us, this step of faith, we must give. So this is kind of our own part of the deal, right? Without this is the first thing that really rejoice the heart of God.
18:54
Mariana
And without peace, without his faith, we will not be able to receive nothing that he has for us. So this is the peace that really transcends all understanding and remains eternally on our hearts.
19:09
Hanka
Love it.
19:09
John
Love it. A few other scriptures come to mind as you're in this world, but you're not of this world. Because if you're in the world and of it, then your peace is dependent upon your navigation through it. But if you're in it and not of it, and you're given a peace that surpasses this world, surpasses any understanding from this world, then the peace is anchored in your soul in a way that the world cannot take from you. And this is deep.
19:40
Hanka
Which is reminding me of something. One of the scriptures, the most important scriptures, when I gave my life fully to Jesus and I surrendered myself fully to him, one of the most important scriptures that gave me hope for every day, it's he who is in you is greater than he who is in the world.
20:05
Joao
Beautiful, may I add one as well. The one that touched me is also abide in me. And you will bear much fruit. If you don't abide in me, you cannot bear fruit. So it's not do and bear fruit and get the results. No, it's the opposite. It's abide. Abiding is the activity. And essentially, it's an activity of rest. And as you rest into his being, everything flows.
20:28
John
I love it because I want to go to the contrast of this beautiful conversation. And that is, well, at this point is, so what are we saying here? You don't do anything anymore. You just sit on the couch, you know, go take, you know, chill out on the beach. And God just does everything now because it's a gift and just sit back. So let's look at that. Because this endless do that we had in our new age walks to some degree, we brought that across. And correct me if I'm wrong for you guys, but I certainly brought that doing this across to Christianity, the mindset. At times I knew I received a gift, I knew I received something that's different. I had this feeling, but the old mindset of, I still have to do something.
21:13
John
I can't just do nothing, you know, I've got to be good now. I've got to do this now, I've got to do this now. From the self took place and there is a scripture that talks about, you started off in the spirit, but you ended up in the flesh, you know, what happened to you guys? I'm obviously paraphrasing there and that's what I think this is. This is my interpretation of it. I don't know what you guys think. So how would you comment on that? You know, so we don't have. It's a gift, but what happens now, and I know you were talking about already Joao abiding in him, but yeah, how do you guys see this?
21:47
Mariana
Well, for me, he's like, he gives this to us like a present, right? For us to settle and to rest on him. But from this rest and from these gifts, the gratitude that come into our heart and the revelations that come on us, and the deep understanding about what is the meaning of all this. Life is the thing that will move us on. No more focusing on our own egos, but instead of focusing on the plan that God has for all humankind. So we keep going. Bye. His grace with courage, with strength and power, doing what he asked us to do, that is sharing the gospel and bringing salvation and healing and deliverance and love.
22:41
John
Understood? Understood. But is it the grace that's doing this? Is it the gift that's carrying us like this response to love? Or do we have to then take the reins and do something of our own capacity? Because we've surely got to play a role in this. This is the tension. This is the thing that I think is a really interesting topic.
23:00
Hanka
So this is a really great topic. And one of my biggest revelations was after learning so much about coaching and cleaning up my mind before coming to Christ, and then I was asking that question, what's the point of this? Or why I even had to go that through? Because now I'm in Christ. And it's the ultimate gift, is the peace. And what I received was the revelation about body, soul and spirit from Ashev, Andrew Wommack back then. And the peace that came upon me after the revelation. When I received it, I had to preach it in the church, but then I also had to walk in it. I needed to walk and to really understand what it means and what I received was it's all about renewing the mind and becoming new. It's not about the doings.
23:47
Hanka
It's not about how good I can do daily basis, because it's not about my works anymore. How many places orphans shy open or how many people I get healed with Jesus Christ. It's about becoming new in him.
24:05
John
And from that place we do.
24:07
Hanka
From that place we do. Exactly.
24:09
John
Because then it's like he loved us first. That love, to the degree in which it penetrates us, changes us, transforms us, we then move. Because if we move apart from that, it doesn't have any capacity.
24:25
Joao
Yes.
24:27
John
Is that how you see it as well, Joanna?
24:28
Joao
Yeah, I see it very the same. So I think I've been through both. I've been through the dysfunctional doing and then the functional, love based doing, and I think the dysfunctional, when I really examine myself, what was happening is that I shut myself off from that connection to God's love and grace. And I said, I'm going to do it to please God. I'm going to take the control of this and I'm going to do my righteousness. I'm going to try and obey. But it was based on myself. And very quickly I found that I burned out. But where I found great peace and joy and lots of amazing results was actually when the more I surrendered into him. And you're talking about this love movement, and Paul says, like this, that the love of Christ compels me to go.
25:11
Joao
And so it's like I see it as a boat on the sea and it's just opening the sail. That's all we have to do. We open our sails, but then the wind of his love will blow us to the destination that the wind is blowing towards. So it's not like we're trying to drive it. We're just surrendering to the wind and the sails, and we become this open vessel where the love of God will lead us to the moments, the peoples, and even the works that he has for us. But those works are grace based works.
25:39
John
Wow. I love that metaphor.
25:41
Hanka
Beautiful.
25:42
John
For me, I'm a failed Christian in my earlier life, and what I mean by that, I'm a completely failed Christian in the sense of I tried to do it in my own righteousness and strength, and I ended up hating myself and the Bible and burnt out. And this is what caused me to go for a long period in the new age. Now I believe God, in his wisdom and grace, allowed all that journey to happen, because I've seen all the dots coming together and connecting, and it's like, wow, he is the one that's orchestrating all this. But then what happened to me was his love won me over. I didn't want to become a Christian. I didn't really like christians. I'm being very frank. I still don't, in a lot of senses, when I say that I don't like them.
26:24
John
I mean, I don't like the religiousness and the squabbling and the backstabbing and all this type of. When it's not coming from grace and the spirit transforming you, it can be quite an off putting thing. And I think a lot of highly evolved, new ages, sensitive people, they see through that. And that broke me at the time. So coming back, it was this love. But similar to hunker, I had this performance mindset that I've got to do. I've got to be. It was very deeply enmeshed. I came from an athletic background, professional sporting background, attempting to do so. And so I had that deeply ingrained within me, within my psyche. And it almost feels too good to believe that this love, that you're that loved and that his grace and love just breaks you down over time. So this really is a love story.
27:14
John
Like, it really is a love story. And it's the deepest love story. It is the most profound love story. It is the most ridiculously lavish love story when it actually penetrates you. And then for me, the Bible then becomes actually good news. Because I used to see the sign I was saying good news. This thing causes me pain. Like, what's good news about this book? This is in my. It doesn't feel like a gift to me because it was my ego and myself trying to do it. But when the full penetration of Christ's love and the truth of the gospel that's so clearly articulated in Romans, Paul's telling it constantly that you can't do what you want. The things you want to do, you can't do. Relax, guys. You can't even keep the ten Commandments. Chill out. Stop trying to be so.
28:05
John
It's the realization that you need a savior. It's a realization that you need love and grace. This cracks you open, and then that starts to transform you organically, naturally, like your beautiful metaphor of the wind just blowing your sails in the direction where love is wishing to move. And that is something deeply beautiful. And I think this is the reason there's a warning in the book of revelations about the love of many growing cold. Now, this is just my opinion. This is not. I don't know if this is true, but what I know is that when you are trying to do something in your own strength and capacity, your love grows cold.
28:44
John
I used to work with professional athletes, and when they had burnouts and they started hating their sport, I knew immediately that they had become too enmeshed or enamored with their performance and the opinions of others, and that choked out the authentic love they had for their sport. So I would immediately facilitate games and trainings to help them reconnect with the love of their sport and connect to their first love. In a sense, and that's in the sporting context, I believe the very same thing is true with Christians in terms of how do you continue to love God? Like lavishly because you're having the revelation he loved you first? And how do you remain in that love? Because it's grace taking you home.
29:27
John
It's love carrying you in all your weaknesses, in all your fall abilities, to the point where Paul says, I boast in my weakness. I celebrate it so that the power of Christ can rest upon me. Now that's true vulnerability without all the pretense, so that the love of Christ can enter in. And that's authentic and that's real. And that is a gift. All right, thanks, guys. Thanks for tuning in.
29:55
Joao
Thank you, everyone.
29:59
John
Thank you for joining us on supernatural breakthroughs. We trust that today's conversation ignited something within you. If you found this valuable, please subscribe and we invite you to leave a review and share this episode with someone who you believe needs to hear it. Sadeena.