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Yappin’ about real life and the OG.
What are some qualities that a man of god's looking for? Start ruffling some feathers.
Tyren:This is about to ruffle a lot of, feathers.
Micaela:Ask yourself, if somebody said I'm just like this person, would it be a compliment, or would I be offended? If you were giving advice to a girl and you're like, this is how to stay out of a situationship, what would you say?
Tyren:They're getting themselves into this predicament because they're not
Micaela:I love that you mentioned that you approached somebody out in I call it in the wild. Like, outside of an app is in the wild. Yeah. But, what did she do that, like, showed you or, I guess, opened the door for you to come and pursue? Was it like, did she look at you?
Micaela:Did she smile? Or did you just see her and you're like, let me go?
Tyren:Yeah. So, I I don't believe that there was any eye contact actually. This is gonna blow blow the waters off. I don't think, because what happened was I seen her at the self checkout
Micaela:Uh-huh.
Tyren:And, I was checking out and she was, like, at the one beside me. And I you know how you, like, I look once and I look like a kid. Yeah. And she was already backing up when I had just started checking out, like, hold up. I I who is that?
Tyren:I wanna introduce myself.
Micaela:Yeah. Yeah.
Tyren:So I yeah. I finished, but I didn't have many items, so it was good. It's not even finished. I'm sorry. I'm like, okay.
Tyren:This is funny thinking about this memory. And, yeah. I walked out and I didn't see it was nighttime, by the way. So this was really a risky situation in a parking lot. Night time, I live in Walmart.
Micaela:Chased her down.
Tyren:I wouldn't say I chased.
Micaela:I love that,
Tyren:though. Well, I guess I mean, I I did look for her. So I guess it is kinda technically chase. But, yeah. So it was like a sketchy situation late night, Walmart parking lot.
Tyren:You know? The worst time to approach somebody.
Micaela:Right. Yeah.
Tyren:So Seems
Micaela:like it was receptive, though.
Tyren:Yeah.
Micaela:So It was What was your opening line? Like, what did you do?
Tyren:Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. So I I so yeah. So I I I didn't see her going to my car. Apparently, she was putting her, cart to the side of Walmart, I guess, and she was walking.
Tyren:And I noticed that, like, the light and the bit of reflecting. I'm like, oh, there she goes. So I walked up to her. I'll say, hey. Excuse me.
Tyren:How are you? And, she already opened, like, big smile.
Micaela:Oh.
Tyren:How are you? Like, she told me her name and, she asked me yeah. Yeah. Yeah. How are you?
Tyren:And she just told me she was doing good. And then I said, what's your name? She gave it to me and, she asked me of mine. And it's just it's happened. It started talking and, yeah.
Tyren:Now we should start flowing and things like that. And Mhmm. Yeah. It it wasn't it it wasn't hard. I mean, it wasn't how can I say it?
Tyren:It didn't feel like it was forced or anything, like, you know, it was just, like, difficult to do. Mhmm. It was it went pretty smooth, but
Micaela:That's cool.
Tyren:I I normally don't really approach women, like, at nighttime where you better because
Micaela:That's true.
Tyren:You hear stories and stuff, but she was, you know, So I had to
Micaela:Good. Good. That's good. I think,
Tyren:I'm queer curious why you asked that.
Micaela:Well, because, one, I would love to know how you indicate to a guy that you're interested without pursuing. I think that's the hardest line to walk as a woman. It's like, you want the guy to pursue, but then it's like, how do I say I'm interested, but it's not creepy, but we haven't talked yet? So then, like, I've heard the eye contact smile. Like, there's this guy that's, like, viral on Instagram right now, and he's Yeah.
Micaela:I forgot his acronym for it, but he's basically like, look, look away, and then look back. And he's like, that was the way that you could, like, indicate
Tyren:That's a good way. Yeah.
Micaela:Or, like, looking, smiling with eye contact and then doing that. But Exactly. That's the reason why I asked. But
Tyren:Go ahead. Keep going.
Micaela:Last thing and then I'll but, I think guys have this expectation where, like because they see all these women online that are like, oh, this guy is creepy. He's like, you know, he came up to me and asked me for my number. That's the minority. Every single female friend I have is dying for a guy to come up and walk up and for their number. So, like, to any guy that's listening, like, please come ask.
Micaela:Like, don't let the, like, one TikToker that went viral for in a gym and be, like, freaked out on some guy because he asked her out. Like Mhmm. That's not the majority.
Tyren:Yeah.
Micaela:Like, the majority would be excited. Or if they have somebody, they'd politely say no, and then they'd be glowing the rest of the day because some guy asked them out. And they'd be, like, telling their boyfriend, like, somebody tried to pick me up at Walmart. Yeah.
Tyren:Yeah. So Yeah. And, I I I believe that I believe that, women do, like, when guys approach them. I know there's, like, that few in between that might think we're weird or Mhmm. Something wrong with us, but I and I I don't like how I don't I don't like when women think that way because that's the normal way of doing it.
Tyren:How you expect for us to become something possibly if it's God's will if if you don't want me to approach you. Yeah. You know? So, yeah, I I encourage every guy to listening. You know?
Tyren:Stop being scared. Mhmm. And if you can see someone you like or you're just attractive to you and you wanna at least see who, you know, who this person is, go and approach. I'm big on approaching. I'm big on because and look.
Tyren:I'm not trying to peek I'm not trying to, peacock my feathers. Oh, I'm bigger, but I don't really you know, I'm just saying that, you know, in life, you have to take opportunities when they come and when you pretend yourself. If you see a lady, and she's open and you think she's look you look, you know, pretty well, and you know it's a opportunity right there Mhmm. And you have the opportunity to do something, like, say something. Mhmm.
Tyren:Don't let the opportunity pass. You might not get the opportunity again. And then two, you're gonna be dealing with thoughts in the back of your mind, like, what if I would have approached her? What if the what would the answer could have been? You know?
Tyren:But, yeah, I I'm big on if if someone even if someone is not giving me eye contact
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:If I gave them eye contact or if I if I see them and they don't see me, like, I we're gonna we're gonna see what what happens. You know? I'm big on taking risk. You know? Mhmm.
Tyren:And, yes, I'm not a hundred I'm not passing all of these. Of course, people might be like, oh, Tyreke, like, he good. No. Like, I I get a lot of, well, I get I get rejections. I think that's just a game.
Tyren:You're not that's one thing that I believe guys are scared of. They're scared of rejections, you know? And they scared it to for a girl to say, oh, I'm sorry. I have a boyfriend or I'm sorry. I'm not interested.
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:Like, how why do we act like this? Like, someone stabbing a knife in her chest or something? Something? Like, that's not that's the worst that can happen. They tell you I'm not interested or I have a boyfriend.
Tyren:Okay. Like, there's someone else out there. Right. We it's not a hundred people that live in this world. It's 8,000,000,000 something
Micaela:people. Yeah. That's true. For sure. I wonder why we take rejection so personally.
Tyren:I don't know why.
Micaela:I guess maybe it's like, they're rejecting me.
Tyren:But to answer your question, give him I'll give him looks.
Micaela:Okay. So just, like, constantly be darting over that way? Like No.
Tyren:Be be normal with it and be smooth.
Micaela:Don't be creepy.
Tyren:Yeah. Be normal with it. But, yes, it's back and forth. Like, let him know that you're looking at him.
Micaela:Okay.
Tyren:And then they us guys oh, she's looking at me
Micaela:a lot. So the problem is is that, like, I'll look, but then it's like, as soon as he looks back, it's like, oh, god. He's looking. Like, let me look away. Like, that's probably not the thing.
Micaela:Like, it should be like
Tyren:I mean, that's so you're thinking you're supposed to keep looking when they
Micaela:look I don't know. I don't know.
Tyren:I mean, I think I think I think maybe one time do it. Kinda give it a little bit longer look and so y'all can kinda get that connection with the eyes, look at each other. Yeah. But, yeah. As many looks as you can.
Tyren:Because we have guys, we know that's one sign to, oh, yeah. Hey. Go say something.
Micaela:Okay. Cool. Sounds good. Sounds good. Okay.
Micaela:So you found the person. You've talked to them. You're you're getting to know them. Mhmm. What are some qualities that a man of God's looking for in a future spouse?
Tyren:So it's so many qualities is, you know, someone who is, of course, loyal loyal loyalty. Loyalty is a really big one actually.
Micaela:Yeah.
Tyren:They care for you enough not to disrespect you
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:By, you know, cheating on you or, behind the scenes talking to other males or other people without your consent and hiding things like this. That's a big red flag. Mhmm.
Micaela:You
Tyren:know? And I think I don't think there's any guy out here in the world that don't that won't no. How how can I say it? I don't think there's any guy out here that do not want a loyal woman. If I find a guy to say, oh, I don't care, Chanelah, something's wrong with that guy.
Tyren:I'll be honest. But, yeah, I I think that's big. Someone who put God first. So, you know and when I say that, I'm saying they put God first so much that they they're they're helping you get closer to God. If you're falling off, if you didn't read your devotional, if you didn't pray this morning, you know, if you're they can see that you're letting the enemy, take over your life.
Tyren:They should be there encouraging you that, hey. You got this. Like, have you consulted God with this? They're encouraging you to get in the faith you know, work your faith.
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:So actually switch that around. Put God first, number one, and then, you know, loyal. Someone who is submissive, and this might
Micaela:Start ruffling some feathers. This is
Tyren:about to ruffle a lot of, feathers, and I'm aware.
Micaela:What does that mean to you, submissive?
Tyren:Submissive to me means someone who listens and receptive and understands her role.
Micaela:Which is I'm for it, by the way. Like, I'm for gender roles. No.
Tyren:I understand that because when I said that, they came out so smooth that I just but the way I said that, I know people watching right now and they're like, what? But, yes. I wanna know her roles and know understand the the level of authority and leadership
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:That we as men provides. Know that it's even written in the Bible that the man is the he's the leader of the household. So not trying to be the leader.
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:Oh, you know, overtake her husband or just about whoever, you know, as the leader of the other decisions or things like that. Yes. You have your you have your choice. You have your voice and your what you what you believe should happen, your and the things that we should do. I understand that.
Tyren:If anything, we welcome you to voice your opinions on things. But if it's something that I see or we as men see that is for the betterment of the relationship, for the this, sacredty of the relationship, anything that will protect her, protect us, then they are receptive to understand. And if they were gonna go do something, they're like, I understand. Even though I do wanna do this, I will listen to you and I when I do this. You know, I will not wear this.
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:I won't go this place when I know that I'm in a relationship doing single activity. Mhmm. You know, and, stuff like that. So when I say submissive, that's what I mean. I'm not saying controlling for any girls out there.
Tyren:It's like, oh, he's a controller. That's what he is. No. I'm not saying controlling. Controlling is you're not allowing your lady to do anything that, like, hey, whatever I say is what's gonna happen.
Micaela:Right.
Tyren:That's not healthy.
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:You know? It should be, you guys, you know, you guys you guys are like a a a team. Y'all talk about things and, you know, you you see where we can agree at things and disagree at things and, you know, work together. That's how the relationships we work together. You know, it's not like everything I say is what is right and it's not.
Tyren:So not a dictatorship, you know. So Right.
Micaela:I think that's huge. And I think Yeah. Women crave the traditional gender roles, generally speaking, in my circle of friends. But it takes a lot of trust to have that because then it's like, do I trust this person to follow them blindly? Because that's kind of almost what it needs to be.
Micaela:Yeah. And I think that that's where it starts to fall apart at least for myself in previous relationships where it's like, I don't trust this person. I don't trust their leadership. So then I would try to control and lead. And so I think that
Tyren:What would break the trust?
Micaela:Lack of character.
Tyren:Okay.
Micaela:Like, seeing them make decisions that would be 100% against what I would think would be the good decision
Tyren:Okay.
Micaela:And having evidence for that. Like, not just
Tyren:I should just Yeah. Saying something. Yeah.
Micaela:Like, oh, he picked a blue instead of it's like, no. Like, this is morally wrong. Like, you shouldn't be doing that. Or immature like, immaturity. Immaturity.
Micaela:Yeah. That's a big one too. Because I think, in order for somebody to lead you, they have to be somewhat ahead of you. You know what I mean? Or at least that you trust them at a minimum.
Tyren:Mhmm.
Micaela:So I think that something that the men have such a great and amazing opportunity to provide for a woman is what we all want. It was where we can shut our brains off. Yeah. Like, how amazing is it to have a significant other that when you're with them, you can just be like, I don't have to worry about it. He has it.
Micaela:That's what we all crave. That's what we want. Yeah. And it's finding that balance, though.
Tyren:Exactly.
Micaela:And being able to share, like, hey. Like, I even if it's business related, like, I don't have a good feeling about this person. I can't tell you exactly what, but, like, something is off and, like, learning to trust her intuition too. Because, like, when male and female come together Yeah. Whoo, it's powerful.
Tyren:It is.
Micaela:And I think there's a big reason why we have those differences is because where I'm weak with the femininity, you're strong in the masculinity and vice versa. And so it's like it that's how it is with how it's supposed to be with relationships.
Tyren:I believe so. I believe so as well. Yeah. And we as men, we we want to be like you said, you shut your brain off and be like, oh, I meant, you know, I'm taken care of. He he got me.
Tyren:I had to worry about nothing. You know? We won't leave a restaurant late at night. You know? You're safely guarded.
Tyren:Mhmm. I'm aware, looking around, making sure nobody, no crazy person is around, snooping around.
Micaela:Right. That's everything.
Tyren:Got the door for you. Yeah. Walking the right side side of the street, you know, taking care of the place, making you know, it's just being a leader, being a protector because that's what we really are. We're supposed to be the protector. Mhmm.
Tyren:And, the lay is like that. You know, she take takes care of the house, take care of the place. She is, just that motherhood, you know.
Micaela:You need peace.
Tyren:Peace. Yes. Things like that. We love femininity. I keep getting that word wrong every time I say it, but we love that.
Tyren:So
Micaela:For sure. They complement each other well. And, Yeah. You saying that, like, the protection side, I think that that's providing and protecting to, like, sum it up. But
Tyren:Yeah.
Micaela:Anytime that I've been in a intimate relationship or even, like, getting to know somebody and he's been, like, preemptive in that, it's just been like, woah. Woah. Like, it sets him apart from others very quickly.
Tyren:Yeah.
Micaela:I shared this on our podcast that got deleted, but I'll share it again. There was a moment where I was on a date and it clearly didn't work out with this person for many reasons. But this one moment, I did like about him. And I was walking, and I was about to walk into the street to, like, cross it. We were walking after dinner.
Micaela:And he, like, grabbed my arm, and I was just like, excuse you. Like, I literally looked at him, like, I had the audacity, like, that you just grabbed it. And then a car went by, and he, like, stopped me from going into traffic. And then all of a sudden, I was just like, oh, wow. Like, he's, like, protecting me.
Micaela:You know what I mean? And then it was, like, instantly attractive. And I was like, oh, wow. So I think, like Never mind. Literally.
Micaela:I was like, he just saved my life. Yeah. So even though that might be a little dramatic Yeah. It's an example of, like, how that is so attractive and something that I know so many women want. Like, for example, another scenario where we were different person.
Micaela:On a date, and we were watching a movie. And so I went over to this person's house, and he had a firearm out, and he, like, brought it next to him. And I was just I was in because I conceal carry almost everywhere. Like, for me, firearms are a pretty big point to, like, be able to protect myself. So that's always something I'm thinking about.
Micaela:Like, okay. Like, the person could come through this door. Like, where would I exit if I'm in a restaurant? Like, where's the exits? Where concealment coverage.
Micaela:Like, where where can I go? And the fact that he literally was just like, hey. Like, it's his home. But he, like, literally brought it out there, and he was like, I just, you know, like to have it closed so if I need it, you know, it's there. Instantly.
Micaela:Instantly. One of the first moments I ever had where I was just like, I don't have to think. He's got it. I'm done. I don't have to be like, what if somebody comes through this door?
Micaela:How do I get out? I was literally like, I can shut my brain off. Like, I don't have to worry about this. This is amazing. Yeah.
Micaela:And that was the first time I actually, like, really enjoyed a movie too. I'm not gonna even lie to you. Like, I was like, this is amazing.
Tyren:Yeah.
Micaela:So, that for an example of, like, being able to provide the ability for somebody to shut their brain off, women specifically, dude, we crave that.
Tyren:Wow.
Micaela:You know? So Thank you
Tyren:for giving me that key pointer right there so I can know. Yeah.
Micaela:100%. One hundred %. Okay. So we kinda went through how we know oh, wait. No.
Micaela:We didn't go through this one. This is one of the questions I had.
Tyren:Yeah.
Micaela:So, like, on the girl side, what are some things that we can see in a guy to know that he's interested?
Tyren:From a girl side, what are some things? Someone who is not playing games.
Micaela:Okay.
Tyren:Someone who is not misdirecting you on their intentions. You know? Mhmm. Yeah. Somebody who has a a clear goal of where where where they want the relationship to go or what they want.
Micaela:Mhmm. Is
Tyren:everything going well on your computer, by the way? Because you're
Micaela:like Yeah. I'm like, I was panicking low key, but, yeah, we're still good. We're good.
Tyren:Okay. Okay. I I know it's a phase now.
Micaela:Phase, and I was like, oh my gosh. Because last time I cut off and we lost everything, but, no, we're good. I just had a little panic. I apologize.
Tyren:No. You're good. You're good. We're
Micaela:good. Okay.
Tyren:I read the the facial expression.
Micaela:He's not playing games. Yeah. What does playing games look like though?
Tyren:Playing games is just you do not know where this is going. He's not open. He's not clear with communication. He's telling you he might be fluffing your ears like, hey. I see something between us.
Tyren:This is no longer. But at the same time, his actions are not lining up. K. You know? So whenever someone tell you certain things, look at the actions.
Tyren:See it it it's just it's a matching up. He, yeah, he's very, of course, like, leading with lust and not leading with love, and trying to bait you to do certain things. Like, stuff like that. That's just get those those are games. So if someone is doing that, they might find you attractive for, like, having you around, but they're not really interested in trying to take it to another level, like, closer to marriage and things like that.
Micaela:Mhmm. So, basically, what I'm hearing is if a guy is interested, he's gonna pursue.
Tyren:Yes. He's gonna pursue you. He's gonna
Micaela:gonna text. He's gonna follow-up. He's gonna be persistent.
Tyren:Good morning text. Oh, really? Yes. Good morning text. Yeah.
Tyren:He's going to well, of course, other guys had their suave, how they do things. Some guys don't do good morning text. Mhmm. But, I know I do. How are you doing?
Tyren:How's your day? You know? Been a gentleman. If that that's the thing right there, and this is this literally just came out of nowhere. You want a gentleman.
Tyren:If if a guy is not a gentleman, that's a that should be a red flag.
Micaela:Mhmm. Mhmm.
Tyren:Because how he talked to you and the things he say, and if he's not checking up on you, those are the things you want to, you wanna, you know, you wanna vet out. You wanna see things like that. See, you wanna notice things like that, because a gentleman normally is someone who respects you to not talk to you any type of way, to handle you a certain way, to, you you come with a problem or, hey. I'm just not emotionally there today or things like that. And he's like, oh, not texting you back or texting you back late and not really caring about your that's not gentleman like things.
Tyren:So when he if he if you get a signs like that, that person is not seriously interested in you. So the opposite of that, if a person is there for you when you're emotionally down I know women are more emotional than guys. So, if he's there for you when you're emotionally down, you know, reach out to talk with you without you, like, start a conversation like he's trying to check up on you. Even, like, if you you know you know, you don't have to always start the conversation about something. He's taking an issue to say something.
Tyren:All those characteristics shows that that person is really interested in trying to take it take it further.
Micaela:Okay. That makes sense. Yeah.
Tyren:And spending time wanting to spend time with you, not from a lustful standpoint, but from a trying to bond and get to know you and see, you know, what what you like, what you're interested in, getting to know you, basically. So, yeah.
Micaela:Okay. I like that. For sure. So, like, what can a girl like, if you were giving advice to a girl and you're like, this is how to stay out of a situationship, what would you say?
Tyren:Oh, that's a good one. Yeah. So I would say I'm sorry to take more longer for me to say this because I just when I before I answer this, I should think about so much my my life. But, because, like, I I'm a answer this question, but I'm a answer it a different way. A lot of women, not all, but a lot of women, they're not they're not serious.
Tyren:You know? I feel like they're not serious. I would really say this, by the way, and this might be this might be extravagant. This might be time. You're off the charges, but I think men are more serious when it comes to relationships than women.
Micaela:Interesting.
Tyren:I know that you would think it would be the opposite. Right?
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:But I it's just from my experience, majority of time, like, I am the one trying, and I'm trying to see how things are going. Let's build. But there's just, like, taking cuts and just, like, not really showing me that they have intention of trying to build something again. It's like they won't certain things, but it's not things that will grow like a relationship or anything. It's just, I think if you wanna stay out of a situationship, you need to show the guy that you're really interested as much as he's interested in you.
Micaela:You
Tyren:know? Ask him how he's doing. Hey. How you're doing? How was your day?
Tyren:And, you know, you also being upfront and telling him your expectations or what or or what you're looking for.
Micaela:Do you think that would scare a guy that's interested if a girl's like, hey. Like, I see, like, a long term future with you. Like, is that would that scare a guy away or only if he probably didn't want that?
Tyren:Yeah.
Micaela:Okay.
Tyren:It will only scare away the ones that, since the beginning, didn't really want that anyway.
Micaela:Okay. Fair enough.
Tyren:And that's why it's important to, at the beginning, start off with what you really want because if you hold it too long, it can hurt you.
Micaela:For sure. Yeah. Or trying to play cool. Like, I think that that's something that a lot of women, including myself, have done in the past where is like, oh, yeah. Like, I'm not really that interested.
Tyren:It's just cool. You know? Exactly. Like
Micaela:Yeah. And then to just if
Tyren:you wanna be a friend, say that you wanna be a friend. Mhmm. You know? Don't hold it on forever, and we I'm thinking something's happening. Then at the at some point, throughout the long timeline, you're like, honestly, I see us as I mean, I'm not really looking for something.
Tyren:I just maybe we can be friends or whatever. Mhmm. That's just like, okay. So this whole time when I thought something was happening, I put I invested all this time, invested all of these things just for it to go nowhere.
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:Because, like, I'm a be honest, like, for me, for Tyrone, like, I'm at a point in my life where okay. I'm I'm okay with friends, but I I'm really looking for something serious.
Micaela:Yeah.
Tyren:You know? And, yeah, I I want something serious and a lot of I'm I'm just noticing a lot of ladies, a lot of them, not many not all of them, but a lot of them are. It's not they're they're they're getting themselves into this predicament because they're not they're not serious. I just feel like I just feel like they're not serious.
Micaela:Yeah. Yeah. I get that. I think I agree with you. I think it's twofold.
Micaela:Yeah. I think that one half is not serious and enjoys the validation.
Tyren:Yeah. Yeah. And and also, yeah, the benefits it's kinda like I'm sorry. I'm cutting you off. I'm noticing that.
Micaela:You're good.
Tyren:I need to do better at that. It's like they want the benefits of, like, a boyfriend
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:But don't want the actual thing.
Micaela:Right. Like or they don't wanna commit to the guy.
Tyren:Yes. And it's just yeah.
Micaela:Yeah. For sure. It's huge. I think another side of it too is that for me on my side, like, with situationships or talking to people longer than I probably should have, it was like a self esteem thing where it was like, this might be the best I could do. Or, I put this person so high on a pedestal that it's like Yeah.
Micaela:I put myself so low that it was like, oh, yeah. Like, it's okay if they, like, text you once a week. That's fine. Like, I haven't heard from them in a month, and then
Tyren:they text back. Like, oh my gosh.
Micaela:Yeah. Like, how are you too? You know what I mean? And then it's like you look back and you're like, oh, wow. Like, I've heard a quote and he said, that actions are a language.
Micaela:And I think that if we take everything away from, like, what they're saying, but we just look at the actions of the person, that can be a true indicator. And I heard another quote from the other side. Like, say if you're a guy or a girl and you're, like, talking to somebody and you're like, why won't I commit? Like, am am I only here for the validation? Something that's super helpful is to ask yourself, if somebody said I'm just like this person, would it be a compliment or would I be offended?
Micaela:That right there will show you, like, am I actually interested in this person or I am I only interested in what they can do for me? Like, what they're giving me in that moment. And so that was a super helpful, like, introspective question.
Tyren:Yeah.
Micaela:So I like that a lot. Okay. So we've we've we've kind of established that it's not like a turn off for a guy for a girl to be open about liking him.
Tyren:No. It's not. If if anything, that's the greatest thing that you could ever do.
Micaela:Dang. Okay. Alright. Good to know. I don't know why it feels like it's the opposite though.
Micaela:Like, it feels like you should be coy and, like, cool about it. But you're saying, like, no.
Tyren:That's the problem though. Yeah. Because everyone both sides trying to play that game, play that role, and then know nothing ever happens because you're I know this is guys, and and I've done the same thing myself. Like, you're trying not to text as quick or fall back and
Micaela:Yeah.
Tyren:Like, and, like, you're not interested in what you really are. That stuff is poisonous. It needs to stop. It's toxic, really.
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:And, I don't know who started that type of thing, but we need I I I love something where it's like the girl is interested and she texting. The guy is interested and he texting. Now I have to be very quick back and forth, but I'm saying, like, there's no games. That's where games that's that's games right there. That's the definition of games.
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:When both are acting like they're not interested and trying to play cool, but they really are interested in Mhmm. Yeah. I agree. I'm glad that
Micaela:you said it was toxic. I feel like it's so common that we think that it's okay. Then I read a book called, Outdated by Jake. I
Tyren:think I heard it before.
Micaela:Super good.
Tyren:Okay.
Micaela:And he was saying, like, the more you play those games, the more you're gonna attract somebody else that plays those games to you.
Tyren:Yeah. And I was like,
Micaela:oh, that's good. So, yeah, I I get that. I used to be the person that was like, oh, they texted me twenty two minutes ago, so it needs to be at least twenty five before I text.
Tyren:I'm glad you say that because I didn't know that there were well, I knew guys did it, but I didn't know girls did the same thing.
Micaela:Oh, for sure.
Tyren:Wow. So now I opened my eyes up on yeah.
Micaela:But then if the guy wouldn't, I would stop. Yeah. I only held the line if he did cut
Tyren:anything. Okay. Okay.
Micaela:Not anymore. But whenever I did do that, it'd be like, if he texted immediately back, then I'd be like, oh, I guess we're not doing that. So then I'd do it. You know what I mean?
Tyren:Who started this thing? It has to stop. I agree. Yeah. Yeah.
Micaela:I don't know who started it. I don't know. It's, there's so many unspoken rules that make no sense.
Tyren:You know what that's like? You know what that's like? And I just thought about this. That's like us having a conversation right now. Right?
Tyren:We're not texting when we're talking. It's like you ask me a question, and then I just sit here. Yeah. And just for twenty two minutes, you're like, then I say something. Yeah.
Tyren:How weird that conversation would be?
Micaela:Yeah. Agreed. It's because kids don't call anymore. That's why. No.
Micaela:I get that. It's rough.
Tyren:You guys stop doing that.
Micaela:Agreed. Agreed. Alright. Last question. Paul talks about singleness being a gift in the bible.
Micaela:Do you agree or disagree?
Tyren:I I agree. And funny funny thing, you know, I'll tell you about the the lady that I met at Walmart? Mhmm. Yeah. So nothing came from that, but she, she told me that I you know, of course, I was like, hey.
Tyren:Can I have your number, like, so we can talk again? And she was like, I don't want to, you know, give you any false hope or anything. I I I'm honestly in my single season because I believe God put me here in this season to, evangelize and to bring people closer to him. And I was like, woah. And it's it was like a power I felt something when she said that.
Tyren:And I can see the spirit of God on her, like, up and down, by the way, too. I didn't tell you all the whole interaction. But she was like, yeah. I feel like I'm doing this for God right now. So, you know, she don't wanna give me false.
Tyren:So I respect see, I respect stuff like that.
Micaela:Mhmm. You
Tyren:know? And then, so I think it's possible. I think it is possible. I think that it's a real thing. For me, I don't think so, but, I think it's something.
Micaela:I'm sorry. People to
Tyren:get it. Don't start it. Yeah. I think it is a gift for some people who can withstand it and who's not easily, you know, turn to their fleshly desires and
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:You know, things like that. But, I know Paul did he then he say that if you're single because being the benefit of being single is a close relationship with God on in undistracted with your regard. But yeah. And that being in a relationship could be a distraction from God. So which we can see, obviously, your relationship with your significant other, most of the times, it's not that you're putting them up with God, but in your mind, throughout work throughout the day, who you're thinking about.
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:Especially if they're not texting back quick.
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:You know? You're thinking about them. So, yeah, I think it's it's some people can do it, but
Micaela:not I agree.
Tyren:Not me.
Micaela:I think I think even the season though of singleness, like, even if it's not the gift of singleness itself, like, being celibate
Tyren:for the
Micaela:rest of your life. But this season, at least for me, I can attest to saying, like, I am way closer to God than I was before. You know what I mean? Like, I'd be lying if I said no. And Oh,
Tyren:of course. Yeah. Okay. Yes. Because in my single season because right now, I'm yes.
Tyren:I'm making bigger strides and reading the Bible, getting closer to God and feel like I'm getting close. Yes. Of course. Yeah. It's oh, yeah.
Tyren:It works. But I'll guess just a lifetime where it's just your full life.
Micaela:Yeah. Yeah. Which there are people that are gifted that way. I'm not one of them. No.
Micaela:No.
Tyren:God is listening to that. I'm not I'm not one
Micaela:of them. No. I'm good. Thank you, but no thank you. I would love to use different gifts.
Micaela:But yeah. But, ultimately, like, if it if it did come down to that sale of, like, God was here and he was like, hey. Would you choose me, or would you choose a relationship? Like God. Yeah.
Micaela:You'd have.
Tyren:Because that's be that'll be crazy to think about that, but, to debate that, that shows, like, that will show God how much of a value he really is to you.
Micaela:For sure. Yeah. And then do I think a relationship provides something that God can't? That's the question. Because, ultimately, if God could provide everything, then it would be a no brainer.
Tyren:The only do the really reason why relationships and having a significant other is, like, very desirable because you have a tangible person that you can share your life with. And, you know, you have someone that you're with, like, you know, like a person beside you. Of course, God the same way he's there, but he's invisible. Mhmm. You know, he's not tangible.
Tyren:He's invisible. So,
Micaela:It makes me think of that verse though where Jesus was like, I have to leave. And they were like, don't leave. Like, they want the physical version of him. He's like, I'm gonna give you so much something so much better like the Holy Spirit.
Tyren:Holy Spirit. Yeah.
Micaela:So it's like we maybe it's because our understanding of something physical, we, put so much more value on something we can see over versus, like, something else that we may not be able to see but is so much better. Because that's how he put it is, like, the Holy Spirit. He's like, dude, I have to leave to give you something so much better. So I wonder if it's because of our perspective where we see somebody physical. I'm talking about myself.
Micaela:I'm I'm thinking about me being mad at God the other day. You know what I mean? Where I'm like, why why? You know? But maybe that's it.
Tyren:Like, we're okay with, like how do I say this? A solitude?
Micaela:Mhmm. I love it. I Okay. Kinda prefer it in seasons. I used to not be, though.
Micaela:That was something that came with time.
Tyren:Okay. Because I I think somebody's perspective on solitude shows a lot about them. Mhmm. If you can't love yourself or be by yourself, you know, then do you really love yourself? Mhmm.
Tyren:You know? I don't think it's always about having yes. As much as we do wanna partner, I do want someone to, of course, but, like, the most important person to love is yourself.
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:You know? Go places yourself. Enjoy foods yourself. Go treat yourself, you know? Be be with yourself.
Tyren:Get learn yourself. Develop things. Learn learn crafts. Build yourself, you know? And I think you have to because if you don't love yourself, trying to ask someone in your life is not gonna fix that.
Micaela:Right. Yeah.
Tyren:It's gonna make it actually worse.
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:You know? Because now you're using people as security blankets, which I experienced before. Like, you don't want a security blanket in your life because when they leave for whatever reason, you're gonna feel back destitute and, oh, I need somebody. You start getting with anybody just to fill that space. You know?
Tyren:That's a person that don't is not comfortable when in their own skin, and that's a bad place to be. You know? You'll always be lonely. You can be with somebody and still be lonely. Mhmm.
Tyren:You know? So just because someone in your life doesn't mean that you're, oh, I'm not I'm not alone. Yeah. You might not be alone, but you doesn't mean you're not lonely, you know, because you don't really love yourself.
Micaela:Yeah.
Tyren:Dang, that's deep. That is yeah.
Micaela:I think remembering too that, like, the source of love, God. And when he says God is love is in us. Yeah. So we're looking for something out in the world to fill something that's like a God sized hole, and that's whenever we become disappointed because it's like, yeah, it's not gonna turn out good.
Tyren:And maybe that's why god is making us wait because he's trying to see if we're gonna put our actual trust in him and trust that he is our companion and that he is the missing piece in our life. He's trying to see do are we gonna accept him as that missing piece to see you know, I think he's kinda I think it's kind of a test, and I believe God do test us. Because we see in the scriptures where he tested he tested Abraham Mhmm. With sacrificing his son. I think he tests to see how we handle situations.
Tyren:Yeah. I
Micaela:think the reason God tests, though, is never because he doesn't know what we would do. Obviously, he does. Yeah. Yeah. I agree.
Micaela:He wants us to basically come to an understanding with ourselves
Tyren:Yes.
Micaela:Where we're finally like, okay. I'll let it go. Do you know what I mean? Yes. So and I do agree with you, though.
Micaela:Like, I think the waiting season is not 100% purposeful. Like, God does not waste a moment. And it even says in in the in the scripture that there's a scripture that talks about, like, how he makes up for the lost time, like, sevenfold. And so I don't think that God at all, you know, is just, like, random number. Let me get on this, like, random generator and be like, alright.
Micaela:Ten years. You're waiting ten years. Have fun. Like, next. You know?
Micaela:Yeah. So I do agree. And I think that it's lessons for us in the moment. I think it's for our relationship with Christ. I think it's for us to become the person that can actually hold the blessing.
Micaela:Mhmm. Like, if he gave me any of the blessings, like, that I had that I have today, if he gave them to me even a year ago, I wouldn't be able to hold
Tyren:them. Exactly. I'd so that makes you believe that makes you realize that maybe the wedding season is this, maturity growing stage.
Micaela:You're
Tyren:trying to mature you. Make wait till you be mature enough to handle, like I said earlier today, the gift that you're trying to bring your life. You try if you put a 13 year old in a car Mhmm. And they're like, oh, I wanna drive. And, you know, okay.
Tyren:Give them keys to a vehicle, and they're not ready to drive. Mhmm. That will be doing more danger to them than good. Right?
Micaela:Yeah. They're
Tyren:not they're not ready for it. You know? So you can give someone something, you know, thinking that you're doing good to them because they want it. But really you could be damaging them, and you don't even know it because they're not ready for it. God.
Tyren:That's I'm sorry. I I hear myself speaking. It's like, that's powerful.
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:So maybe god is looking at us like that. He's like, god god, I want this. Lord, you're on your knees every night.
Micaela:Oh my god. He doesn't care right now.
Tyren:He's like he's he's having some doing that. And, yeah, because he's like, you're not you're not ready. You're still not ready. You know? And like I said, we gotta do we need we need a, self examination in our own life and areas that we need to work on to, to make sure we're right in in areas so that we could be prepared for whenever god gives our gift.
Tyren:Because don't don't ever think that god don't have nothing special for you, like, someone special for you. I wanna tell you that.
Micaela:Like Well, thank you.
Tyren:Because and I can see it, by the way, too. Mhmm. I can see it. And I think I know where you you're gonna I I this is coming out of nowhere. I mean, you're just coming I know this is like you probably expect this, but I think I can I see where you're I know where you're going to?
Tyren:Well, I don't know, but I think I know where you're going to meet yours.
Micaela:Where do you think? Enlighten me?
Tyren:Well, I mean, I I believe at Watermark, you're gonna meet somebody. I believe. I I see it. Somebody there. I don't know.
Tyren:I mean, you're just you're a outspoken person. You're friendly, and you meet a lot of people. Mhmm. And people attract your energy. You know?
Tyren:And I could just see you meeting someone. I don't know the event, a Porsche night.
Micaela:Hey. Let's hope so.
Tyren:Yeah. Sunday service.
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:Yeah. It's gonna happen. It's it's I believe someone there you're going to run into and, you know, you just, you know, just believe in that. You know? And I know it's gonna happen.
Tyren:You just haven't and it it already happened. You just haven't reached the time in your life to experience it yet.
Micaela:Mhmm.
Tyren:You know? For me, I know it's gonna happen sometime soon. I feel it because I I'm getting closer to God, and I'm healed from my last experience. And I know and I feel like something is you know? I feel like God is working something out, but we just gotta just continue to, you know, honor God and just pray and and wait because your wedding season is not in vain.
Tyren:I just want I wanna let you know that it's not in vain. It's not.
Micaela:Yours either. And I think anybody listening too. And, that led me to feel like we should probably pray over whoever's listening to this while they're in their, like, waiting season. Are you okay with that? Like, I'll start, and then if you wanted to take over and then we can finish with that?
Micaela:Yeah. Yeah. Of course. Awesome. Alright.
Micaela:I'll, I'll go ahead and get us started, and then we'll we'll end for a prayer for anybody that's listening that's in a waiting season right now, and maybe they need some encouragement.
Tyren:Okay.
Micaela:Okay. Cool. Awesome. Yep. Dear father in heaven, thank you so much for the opportunity for us to pray together virtually like this.
Micaela:Lord, I pray for the heart that's on the other side of this that feels hopeless, that feels confused, frustrated, fearful, any of those things. And they're in a waiting season and they don't see your hand clearly yet. I pray that you encourage them, that you bring the peace that surpasses all understanding over them in their life. I pray that you show them how tangible you are in their everyday life, that their value and worth isn't found in a relationship. It's not found in another human being, but it's found in our identity that is in you.
Micaela:I pray for the person to find them. I pray for clarity, not only in their, path, but in the path of the person who's meant to pursue them. And I pray for them to be able to fully trust you in that process, that no matter the time or the circumstances that they trust, your goodness, your faithfulness, Lord, you say that how much more does our father in heaven know to give good gifts if our father on earth does? I pray that they are able to lean into and understand your nature in this season.
Tyren:Yes, Lord God. I just I want you to touch everyone who's listen touch everyone heart who's listening to this right now, God, to let them understand that you still see them and that just because it's a delay that they're not denied, god, that you see them and you have someone in their life, in their journey, and that you are are gonna bless them, god. And I ask that you just allow everyone listening right now to just trust in you and to just build up that faith, god, and to not give up. God, you said that do not get weary in good doing, for you will reap if you do not if you do not give up. You know?
Tyren:Do not get weary. You just keep going. And, you know, it's just let I I touch I actually touched everyone's heart right now that's listening, god. So allow them to, you know, just just get closer to you, god, and to trust in you and just build a better relationship with you, god, because we know that through our relationship with you that, you know, that's what you want, god, and that you will bless us, and that you will show your hand, god. And,
Micaela:God,
Tyren:I just know you're gonna do great thing great things through all of us, God. And just let us be more patient and just wait on you, God. Thank you, Lord.
Micaela:We pray all these things in Jesus Christ's name. Amen. Oh, that was good.
Tyren:That was good.