Grace Patterson on Acting, Ambition & the Audacity to Try

Actress, author, model, producer and entrepreneur Grace Patterson joins Sam Weber for a wide-ranging conversation about creativity, perfectionism, resilience and the audacity to bet on yourself.

Grace shares the unlikely path from making homemade movies as a kid to competitive cheerleading and eventually building a career on screen. She takes us inside her acting process, reflects on the pressures surrounding body image and performance, and discusses how her childhood—including growing up alongside a brother with special needs—helped shape the person and performer she became.

They also explore Slotherhouse, writing and entrepreneurship, failure, the changing economics of being a creator, and why so many talented people never give themselves permission to pursue the things they're capable of doing.

Ultimately, Grace's message is simple: there is no perfect time. Have the audacity to try.

I think “Have the Audacity to Try” is also probably your strongest title/hook for this episode because it comes directly from Grace's closing message and encapsulates a major theme running through the conversation.

What is The Bigger Why?

The Bigger Why is a long-form podcast exploring meaning, growth, mindset, purpose and the decisions that shape a life and drive behavior.

Hosted by Sam Weber, the show features unhurried conversations with founders, CEOs, authors, creators, artists, actors, investors and thought leaders about focus, ambition, failure, regret, triumph, philosophy, personal growth and the stories behind success, sacrifices made, lessons gleaned and wisdom embodied along the way.

00:00:00 Speaker: Because I think sometimes people with more talent are not doing it, where if they did just put themselves out there, they would. They're better than everybody actually doing it. They just need the audacity to put themselves out there. Today. On the bigger why I'm joined by actress, model, author, poet and entrepreneur Grace Patterson. Like la la la, you know what I. And then I'm like, yeah, can I have a second for the second scene? I like. Grace has built an impressive career on screen, appearing in films including slaughterhouse. Can we talk about slaughterhouse for a moment? Say Sigma Lambda, theta, Sigma Lambda theta. Okay, come on, I'll show you around. You trust us to not let you freeze, sister? Well, walk. Talk about Grace's years as a competitive cheerleader and how the discipline, pressure, and performance of that experience helped shape the actresses. Today, you're kind of training like an athlete, but you need to look more like a model, including Viv, our co-captain Josie, Jasmine and Julie, our very own J crew, and of course, our captain Madison. I lined up headshots, I. And I got things wrong. This conversation is really about everything that happened behind the credits, I wasn't invited. Grace talks about what it takes to make a life as an actor. That's why I want to know the script and the character so well. So Grace is totally gone. The thoughts I'm having are gone. I'm just there having fun playing. I changed my major to what I'm studying graphic design. Now. What about criminal justice? I was the mean girl, for example. This is like the mean grace. So imagine my surprise to learn that you're nothing but a lying little snake in the grass. An acting is only one part of Grace's creative life. She's modeled written books, shared her story through her memoirs and poetry. Do you have, like, a daily, like your morning pages? Writer or book club will be reading my book. I am so excited to hear all your thoughts on my book. This is a conversation about creativity. I definitely want to do more comedy. Wish me luck. Anything for our third Musketeer. Eggnog resilience. Especially for cheerleading. You know, we would have to line up and a bra and booty shorts and turn. And then they're taking notes on and continuing to bet on yourself, even when the path looks nothing like you thought it would. I guess after we recorded our conversation, Grace co-starred alongside her husband, Britt Bankhead, in the horror film The Town That Takes, which hit theaters this past July tenth. Oh Lord have mercy. Have you ever seen anything like that before? Oh. You have the audacity. Go try it. You don't need. There's never a perfect time. And the worst thing that's gonna happen is like. Without further ado, here's my conversation with Grace Patterson. Enjoy. If I would smoke a cigar, I would inhale the cigar. Yeah. And that's really. Cigars are so bad for you. Like, your cigarettes are bad for you, too. Yeah. So, like, I mean, everyone's into, like, chewing tobacco now, and, like, I could easily get into that stuff, but then I would never be able to stop. So. But anyway, so these Uber drivers like change your life. So you guys all right? Oh, cool. All right. So firstly, how are you doing? I'm good. I'm glad. I'm glad to hear. So you just finished shooting Happy Holidays right? I did, yeah. So yeah, they changed the name. So now it's called Happy Holiday. And I play Holly. So we shot it in Owensboro, Kentucky. And then a little bit of it in Henderson, Kentucky. So it's a really small town. Um, so we shot it in ten days. It was a really quick shoot. That is a quick shoot. Yeah. And you know, in researching for this conversation, I actually realized I know nothing about acting. I actually thought acting was you just shut down everything and try to like, get into a character's mind and just kind of envision what that person was doing. But it seems like there's like a lot of different styles. Do you have any particular style that you ascribe to or try to utilize, like when you're on these sets? Yeah, I think yeah, everybody has sort of their own different process. And I think, you know, I started acting classes when I was nine, so I've kind of developed and fine tuned my process over the years. But one, my first thing is memorization, making sure I know my lines completely. Because then then you're not having to think about the lines at all. You can be totally free in the scene. And then I do a thing called scoring my script. So that's like, my scripts look insane. It's writing, it's like the lines and then it's just scribbles everywhere. And that's where I do internal thoughts and I'll do different ones for each line. So on set, if a director gives me a note, you know your lines going to be said differently based on the thought you had before the line. So if I have ten different thoughts or fifteen different thoughts that I've kind of said, okay, this might work here, this might work here. When you get a note, you can try those different thoughts and that's going to change the way the scene plays. So, so will you do like multiple takes of the same, um, like saying the line in different ways? Yeah. So they kind of do, they'll do, you're doing a scene depending on, you know, obviously for like slaughterhouse, we shot it in two months. So you're spending more time on a scene for something in ten days, you only get a couple takes. So they'll do like a wide shot. Then they'll go in for coverage, which is like your close up medium shot everything. And, um, you know, I choose the thoughts I think work best. And sometimes that does change based on what the other actor gives you. So if they deliver a line differently, that might negate all of my work because now that might change my thought. So, you know, you kind of do all the prep or at least that's what I do. I prep for as many hours as I can so that when I'm there, I can just have fun and play. So you're when you're in the character, um, are you fully embodied in that other version of yourself? And is it kind of cool? Because I would imagine it's kind of cool to be able to try on all these different hats that you might not be able to wear in real life. Oh yeah. Yeah, I do totally immerse myself. Like I don't like to think about. That's why I want to know the script and the character so well. So Grace is totally gone. The thoughts I'm having are gone. I'm just there having fun playing. Playing really is just playing. Yeah, yeah. But it is fun because different characters are, you know, different, but you do find pieces of yourself in each role. Or at least I do. There's always a piece that I'm I relate that is, I mean, because you can't change your complete essence, right? So like, I'm still here. It's just so, so if Grace is playing the mean girl, for example, this is like the mean grace. And then if grace is like the vulnerable, this is the vulnerable grace. But it's still different versions of grace just in these kind of for sure. And the mean roles I've played, I know I did one killing all my sisters where I was the mean girl. But it's funny because when I read the script, I didn't interpret her as mean. I, I saw her vulnerability and I saw why she was, you know, technically saying rude things. But and when I did the role, um, Haylie Duff actually directed it and she was like everyone else that read for it played it so mean. But you made Brittany kind of likable and made me feel for her. And that wasn't really my intention is just I'm not really mean spirited. So I think when I read things like that, I'm drawn to bring out, you know, the kindness or not even necessarily the kindness, but the other sides that might make someone act that way, which is actually probably in real life, mostly true because people are like more. Yeah. I mean, people are more complicated, right? Like everyone has different motivations going at one time. Like no one thinks they're the bad guy. And that's the thing when you're playing the bad guy, no one thinks they're the bad guy in their head. They're justified. There's a reason they're being mean to that girl. They're jealous or they feel insecure, you know? So if you just focus on, oh, I'm mean, no one's no one thinks that they're mean. That's so true. So that's so true. That's how I look at it. I think that's where maybe actors could fall into, you know, not taking the right path for a role because there's just caricature of like, that's a mean person. But then like, it's not, they're not really in their minds. They're not the mean one. No, for sure. Um, so maybe let's rewind a little bit because you said you started acting classes at nine, so maybe just take me through a little bit of like your upbringing and your childhood. Obviously, you wrote the memoir, which I read and loved. Um, I touch on some things in the memoir, but I grew up in a really, I don't know if you're familiar with Dallas at all. Not not all that much. I'm more of a New York, New York? Yeah. It's like totally. I grew up on I mean, it's not necessarily a farm, but kind of like we have longhorns, cows. My mom gardens. It's, you know, so and we have a lot of acres. And so I'm the oldest of four kids. And, you know, my school that I went to was like thirty five, forty minutes away. So I didn't really have my mom didn't want to drive me on the weekends to hang out with friends because they all lived in Rockwall, which is almost an hour. So I was kind of left to my own devices on the farm, you know? So like most kids are like most kids are. So I had asked for a camera and I started writing my own little short films. And then I had basically a whole crew because I have all my siblings, and then my cousin and her siblings live next door. There's four of them. So we had an actor's film crew, so I bullied all of them to be in my home movies. And, um, I would direct them and write them, and then we would edit it and show my parents and I would charge them money per ticket and I would make t shirts. And so you were you were entrepreneurs. I was like entrepreneur. I was making it was like a side hustle producer. But then I would kind of be a mean director because I wanted it to. I was very much a perfectionist. So my siblings would try to quit and I'd be like, everyone's leaving. Why are my mom suing you for breaching my mom's like, well, try being nice to them. Maybe they won't all walk off of your side. That is hilarious. So anyways, I was just drawn to it and then I said I wanted to get into acting classes and my family's not creative at all. They're business people, accountants. And they said, if you figure it out, we'll drive you. So I said, okay, can I have your login to your email address? So I was impersonating my mom by age ten. Hi, I'm Chris Patterson. My daughter wants to be an actress daughter spelled wrong. There's like all this like spelling errors. Um, but I did, I lined up headshots. I, and I got things wrong because I was researching as a kid. So instead of you have a demo reel and a headshot, I thought it, I called it a and then a resume. So I made something called a video resume, which is like not a thing. And it was just me doing a monologue. I just got my research kind of messed up. That's great. I mailed it out to everybody. Grace Patterson's video resume. Now, everyone. Now everyone's doing the video resumes. I know. I'm like, what is a video resume? Like, what does that even mean? Reading your resume on camera. So, I mean, I was, you know, I was young. I was just trying to figure it out. That's great. No, really. Because there really I mean, there are rules and conventions in the way people do things. Yeah. But I think actually sometimes we think like we have to follow them and throwing them out, like throwing things from scratch, like throwing the whole system out sometimes can be, uh, lead to shockingly good, good results. Yeah. Because everybody is doing something. If you get a video resume, like stand out, like, wait, who is this person? Yeah. They're like, wait, what? Yeah. So yeah, that's kind of how it started. And then got in acting classes and, you know, hounded my parents until they would drive me places. And so in the beginning, you were cast in a lot of these kind of cheerleading roles. I guess, given your history, being a cheerleader, cheerleader, and maybe you can talk a little bit about that era of your life. Yeah. So I grew up, yeah, dancing. My mom was definitely a dance mom. So she because she was a dancer. So we had, we shared that kind of thing in common. So I did competitive dance and then my drill team and then I danced in college at University of North Texas, did a semi-pro team, Allen Americans, and then danced professionally for the Dallas Stars. Um, and then I moved to LA right after, like I left stars right when they went to playoffs to like move. Um, and yeah, then I started doing the cheer movies. It kind of worked out though, because I had auditioned for a director back in college and I ended up not taking the movie, but he had kind of followed me on Instagram and saw what I was doing. So when he saw that I had been a professional cheerleader, he was like, hey, we're making these cheerleader movies. Would you choreograph the cheers? I was like, I'm not really a choreographer, you know? So I but I wanted to get in the movie. So I said, okay, if I'll choreograph it, if I get a role in the movie. So I kind of use it to my advantage. And they were like, okay. I mean, I guess so I just died in the first couple of movies. And yeah, I like, I was like the first girl to die and I did all the choreography. Lifetime loved the choreography because, you know, I'm an actor too. So I knew these girls might not have the dance experience. What looks good on camera? Hair flips. Anybody can do a hair flip, you know? So I did easy moves, lots of visually, you know, the hair flips look good because I've seen the jumbotron at the stars game. I know what the fans want to see. Hair flying, hair flying everywhere, hair flying everywhere. So we did that. Yeah. And so but then after being in so many lifetime movies, they started taking, oh, maybe she could be like the lead, or maybe she could be a supporting. So. And and now when you take on roles like are you screening to go in a certain. Like, do you have a vision of where you want to go and the type of stuff you want to do? Definitely. I think at first, you know, you're just taking anything you can because you have to build your resume and then, you know, you get to a point where you do start turning down roles. Like if it's a character I've already done, I'll definitely probably pass, you know, unless I'm connected to the project where I know the director, the producers. Um, but yeah, I mean, I definitely want to do more comedy. That's a big goal of mine, but I'm also drawn to darker stuff. My, my background's more in horror thriller stuff. So that's always I have, you know, heart for that too. So I don't technically have a genre I'm necessarily pursuing, but I think when I read a script, I know if it feels if it feels right. Yeah. And how do you, how do you kind of find the time to do all these projects? Because you crank out so much creative work, it's really impressive. Like, are you, um, do you sort of have a set schedule, like a working schedule of, of, of when you're doing different things? Like what's your system like? I mean, I feel like you can't necessarily control creativity, right? So it kind of is either coming to me or it's not. So like for the writing thing, it's if I'm passionate and immersed in the book, I'm gonna probably lose a couple nights of sleep writing and, and then I might lose my creative creative streak for a month and take a break. But for acting, I mean, I'm always ready to hop in. So if there's a script I'm passionate about, then I just dive in and it's full. I memorize in the morning, I memorize at night, I go over the script like when I'm filming, I wake up early, go over it for two hours, film twelve hours, come back, go over it for another two hours. It's just like, it's my passion, you know, so it doesn't feel. Do you have a good memory generally? I think so, yeah. Okay. So so the the memorization aspect is not is not the hard part for you. I overdo it for sure. I want to feel because I hate messing up if I mess up because you know, we're human. Like if you mess up, then it's it's in my head. Oh my gosh, I just messed up and I can't have fun anymore because then I'm thinking, oh, interesting, I messed up. I'm wasting everybody's time. So you're, you're self critiquing. I'm self critiquing if I ever mess up. So my kind of number one thing is I don't want to ever mess up. Yeah. But messing up is I mean, it's part of being human though. It is. And there's been a couple of times, but I try to do so much preparation that I'm not going to forget a line. I hardly ever forget my lines. So you're never like, hey, I need the line. No. So do you feel do you feel on set that if somebody does do that, people are kind of like, it's funny because I never judge people when they mess up. You know, like we're harder on ourselves. So if people are messing up, I'm like, hey, it's human. No big deal. But if I mess up, I'm like, what is wrong with you, you loser? You can't. So, um, but, you know, if other people are messing up, I'm like, what's the big deal? You got it, you know? So talk to me about this perfectionism for a moment because, um, obviously you talk in your memoir, you went through some eating stuff. I mean, where, where are you with that now? Now I'm in a really good place. I mean, that that was back in I mean, I was twenty one in college and stuff. So and then obviously I dealt with it in high school, middle school, kind of my whole life. But it's weird because I've let go of the perfectionism, like towards my body, you know, I mean, obviously I like to still take care of myself, but maybe because it comes out in performance aspects, I'm not so hyper focused on my body necessarily. It's more like I want to do a good job. So I still have that tendency to obsess and be a perfectionist, but I've worked really hard to not do that for my body because, I mean, there was a time when I was so skinny it didn't look good on camera. And so then I think deep down I know that too. You know, there's, there's a line you can't you need to look healthy and you need to look good. And also you want to influence people that are watching. I want little girls watching and thinking, oh, you know, I need to be that skinny. I just want to be healthy. And yeah, yeah, try not to stress so much about it. And I think especially with kind of the social media culture where like people are comparing themselves to standards that are completely unrealistic. Yeah. Especially with AI and stuff, everyone's like, oh, I need to have perfect skin. I need to, you know, be this size. And it's like, I mean, really what matters most is just fueling your body. It's like, you always know those people say those things to you, but when you are struggling, it doesn't click right. Everyone's like, just eat healthy and don't overeat. What's the big deal? Right. And you're like, well, how do I not overeat? Or how do I, you know, it's like it doesn't click. So it's like, I understand being in that place where people are telling you these things and it's just not clicking. Right. Like just my mom kept just being like, just don't think about it. Just eat when you're hungry. That's it. Just stop when you're full. And I'm like, okay, what? Like that made no sense to me, but because because I had always struggled with food. So but now it's like, yeah, I get it. I get it now. And now you can say, oh yeah, just, just don't overeat until you're full. It will be like, what are you talking about? I mean, I, because now I can eat a cupcake and eat one cupcake. And before ten years ago, that would have never made sense to me, to my head, like, how could anyone stop at one cupcake? They're so good. Out of your mind. Yeah. I mean, I'm like the icing. How would you just put it away? Like that would be that would have been like, unfathomable. When I hear people talk about it, it's sometimes it's like, well, firstly, the body sends signals. If someone's not eating enough, like, hey, we're starving, we're starving, we're starving. Yeah. And then you kind of feel like once you cross that line, you're like, ah, I crossed the line anyway. Like f it. Like, yeah, we'll pick it back up tomorrow. Exactly. Have you ever had like food? I definitely have had. So I'm a lifter. Okay. Um, so with lifting, there are times where I'm going through thirty five, you know, four thousand calories a day. Like no problem. Like power lifting. It's not no, it's not even powerlifting. I mean, it's, this would be like sort of like bodybuilding. Okay. I lift heavy though. I lift like probably two to three days a week, like three to four reps max. Um, I don't do, you know, like squats anymore or, or, or bench press because I broke four ribs. Having a bench fall on me, which was not a fun experience. Um, but you can and then you'll go through training sessions like, you know, where you're over fueling and then now you're going on a cut and you're dieting down. Yeah. Right. So that cycle, the cyclicality of it gets confusing on the body. Yeah. For sure. I mean, I think more men struggle with body image than people know too. I would agree. Yeah. And they don't have really the platform or space to, to speak on it. Yeah. But men face a lot of pressure too, especially yeah. With bodybuilding where you're, you know, bulking, cutting. You want to have the abs. Yeah. The gym culture is the same, I think, for men and women at this point, right? Like, you know, when I'm in the gym, it's going to be mostly like twenty year olds, you know, and I have a, I have four boys. So my oldest son, I can't wait to lift with him. It's going to be like crazy. You're so young. I have four boys. Um, so it's going to be, you know, super fun. But I told him like, you can like I do not let him start lifting. How old is he now? He's only twelve, so he's got to wait a while. He's got to wait. And I see these little kids in the gym. I'm like, I don't know, you gotta. I mean, they need to grow first. That will stop their growth I think. Yeah, it will sell your growth. But I'm more concerned even with like the psychological aspect of the whole thing. Yeah, I think that's good to protect your kids from that. So just on the perfectionistic thing, like I wonder, and you tell me what you think about this. Like, I wonder if it's kind of people ascribe value to a certain thing, right? Yeah. And then whatever that thing is, it's like, I'm going to judge myself by that. So if I'm a cheerleader and everybody's measuring how much I weigh, right. And so then that's going to become your barometer for your self-worth. And then you could, you could put that into anything, right? You could put that into acting and say, hey, if I screw up a single line, like I'm going to give myself thirty nine lashes because like, what's wrong with me? Yeah, no, I think that's definitely, definitely it. Especially for cheerleading. You know, we would have to line up and a bra and booty shorts and turn and then they're taking notes on, you know, they would say jump. And if anything moves, it has to go. Oh my gosh. So, you know, and you're dancing in a two piece uniform. So you are bouncing around. So if anything moves you, you feel it like you can't. And you know, everyone is watching and stadiums huge bounced off like the team. You'll be kicked off the squad. They will bench you. Yeah. If they don't think you look good in a uniform, you're benched. That is why. So there is an elevated pressure to that. And you know, we would have to do like so many workouts a week on top of three to four hour dance practices every night on top of the games all day Saturday. But you don't want to eat too much because you're going to be in a two piece. And a lot of girls wouldn't want to drink too much water because they would want it to look their stomachs to look defined. So you're kind of training like an athlete, but you need to look more like a model. So, you know, you're kind of not eating and drinking water, but then you're exercising. It's physically exhausting. Yeah. Yeah. So I think it is hard not to be consumed by that because who wouldn't feel that pressure? So that's definitely what I felt is I, it was I should have communicated more with my parents, what I was going through because they thought it was so cool that I danced. And my family likes coming to the games. And I kept trying to quit and they'd be like, no, no, like, you have to stick it out. But, you know, but they just don't understand like the full. I didn't tell them like, oh, I have an eating disorder, you know? Right. They just think that I'm exercising. That's why. Right. Well, it's like, I mean, it's great that you kind of got to where you are now. Yeah. Um, and, you know, you seem like very vibrant and exuding like happiness. Um, which I'm, which I'm happy to see. Yeah. Um, and so at this stage, um, do you view yourself more as an actor? Um, or do you still have like a sort of bigger vision? I know for a while you had this clothing, bad kids clothing, and there was a lot of like talk of kind of like, um, the, you know, the entrepreneurial business side, like, where is that in your head right now? I still definitely have that. Um, I do produce with my husband for Bankhead Productions. So I still have the, I mean, that's just, I mean, because even making home movies, you know, as a kid and running that business and I was always making bottle cap necklaces and selling them. I made phone cases at school that were. It was like silicone, but it looked like icing. I was always like. I was like the kid with the jacket, I'm selling this, I'm selling this. And I would get like pickled salt from the gas station for a dollar and sell it for five. I was always like trying to, I always had like kind of a scheme, like a scheme or plan or business kind of rolling. So that's still a part of me. And I think for acting, it's like I am running kind of the Grace Patterson business, like the brand and the roles I take and, you know, choosing the right manager, choosing the right agent, choosing the right attorneys, like choosing the right team. Um, but I think with the producing, I've gotten to do that too, but I would love to one day own another company. So I mean, yeah, it was a hit to have a business fail. But you know, I think, you know, sometimes you just got to try again until it gets the one that pops off. I mean, I happen to think when you mentioned the business of Grace Patterson, you know, I was reading an interesting article that Gary V posted on on LinkedIn yesterday, which really stood out to me. And he's like, the age of the individual enterprise has arrived. Yeah. And I'm on the flight yesterday. Um, and I'm going through like the American Airlines stuff and there's a new tab now that says podcasts and audiobooks. Oh, you look at the award shows podcasts are on there, right? So an individual now has the capability, if you have the brand to be a essentially a production studio, because if you think about like the gatekeepers now in the film industry is done, the access is so easy. And then with AI coming in and all the like, software products to build any business. If you want to start a wine company, you want to start a clothing company, you want to start whatever it is. If you already have the Grace Patterson brand, right, the rest of it is much easier. Yeah. And, and more cost effective and efficient to be able to roll out. So I think yeah, head is in the in the right place. Yeah. I know it is crazy. People can, you know, just pick up a microphone and go for it. Like, you know, there's no like, it is kind of cool that there's no necessarily gatekeepers anymore. Like you can just go out and do it and the platforms are there. So yeah, I mean, you look at Mr. Beast, right? Oh my gosh, yes. He's so cool. He works so hard. Yeah. And he's built a magnificent huge. Yeah. It started off as just a sort of like the show. Um, yeah. So in terms of um, like roles on the horizons or um, other things that you have cooking, um, you know, where, where are you at on that? I have a couple of things coming out this year, so we'll have Happy Holiday, a film that me and my husband produced. Croatoan will be out, I think within the next like two months. Um, I did an action film. They changed the name. I think it's called prayers for the innocent now than I did a horror movie in Austria that I think is coming out. They keep changing the title, so I'm not sure the name of that one. I think I'll have like four or five movies come out. And then there's a couple couple roles, like in the works right now to film this year. So how is it working with your husband? It's fun. Yeah. Do you guys read lines together? Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah. I'll like be like, hey, I need to run this scene just to see if I know it. And he helps me tape auditions and stuff. So it's, it's nice to have someone that gets it because sometimes you can nail the nail it quickly, and then sometimes you do need someone to sit there and direct you and take time and not get frustrated. Like before I met him, my brother was my reader and he would always be like, oh, I'm over this. Like, I'm so tired. Like, or if it's like a, you know, certain type of role, he's like, I don't want to watch this. I'm turning around, you know, like, I'm like, Clay, I need you to lock in. I need you to focus. So it's kind of nice having someone that you know will help you. Um, so it sounds like you're close with your, with your siblings. Oh, yeah. Did you guys grow up very close? Yeah. I think when there's kids are your son's close in age, the four, like we have them pretty much every other year. But yeah, but what has happened was it's like every other one is close because like the person that comes after you steals your thunder. Yeah. So there's that competition. Yeah. Yeah, that makes sense. I would say that's because it's me and my sister and we're kind of the same. We're me and my sister are fourteen months apart. Then my older brother is like a year and a half, two years behind her. And then Matthew, my youngest brother, is a year and a half, two years behind. So it was like back to back. But I was closest with my older brother Clay, or younger, but oldest brother, we were the closest and I would fight with my sister. You. Now we're close, but stealing your thunder. Yeah, yeah, there's more competition because you're close in age, right? Yeah yeah, yeah. Like they definitely, they definitely get along. But you can see like there's a natural like affinity towards someone who is the every other one. Yeah. Um, but, um. And then what about like religion? Did you grow up religious at all? Yeah, we grew up Christian. Okay. So we kind of went like on and off. Like my youngest brother, we had kind of a situation happen with him. We had a hospital error after he was born. And so he was never supposed to walk or talk. Uh, he does now. He's, he's definitely exceeded what they expected. So after that, we took a break from church and then like slowly got back into it. And now my mom runs a lot of organizations that help with special needs families. So we, she runs, she runs it, we volunteer, uh, called reimagine. So we do that where we, you know, provide a meal and hang out. We babysit the kids and they have either game night or a speaker come in that kind of navigates the special, you know, raising a special needs kid. Um, so we do that and then we're very involved in his day hab that he goes to, it's called be happy And it's it's a since he's been there, he's thrived. He's twenty five now. Um, so we've really seen him. He has like a better social life than I do. I'm like, how do you have so many friends? Like what? So that kind of we got more into, you know, the ministry and stuff because of that later on. I mean, I think having a community of any sort. Yeah. Um, you know, is, is irreplaceable, especially when things are, are challenging. Exactly. So that was, you know, hard growing up because I think, you know, my parents had no experience in that because they didn't have any special needs siblings or family members. So it was like, how do we navigate this? And then, you know, but I think he's progressed so well because my mom had us, so we would do the therapies with him. So because we didn't want him to be like singled out. So we were all like in sensory therapy and going and a part of that. Um, so yeah, and I think it helped him, you know, the doctors couldn't believe that he walks and talks. They were like, wait, like, that's crazy. Do you think it impacted you at all? Like having a younger for sure. I, I had later went to therapy on it and she, she said, your siblings and you took on the classic roles that would happen when something happens, because I was five when that happened. And one sibling becomes the clown, which was me, and one becomes the invisible child, my sister, and then one becomes the caregiver, the caring one. And that's my older, my brother Clay. So we kind of all like naturally fell into those things. So I think that's part of the reason I'm drawn to acting, to be honest, to, because that was my role in my family is you were the performer. Okay, so everybody's sad. I gotta come in and make everybody happy. You know, that was so I was always trying to be goofy and make everybody laugh and bring the joy. So it is. It is like interesting when you look back because you're like, oh, that's probably why. Right. I like what I do because it's so like ingrained in me, right? From like child. That's how that's like your survival as a kid, right? You know, but it's still a part of you. And that's when I went to therapy. She was like, it's still you. It's not a performance that is still who you are. Like, that's right. Who you became at five. Yeah. Meaning you coalesce this idea about yourself. Yeah. And like, you feel great doing that, right? Because, because you're in a situation where like, people do need to be cheered up, right? Like it's a tough situation. And you're like, hey, I got this. Like I could carry, you know, and like, you learn to, um, like, feel confident and feel good about yourself doing that. And like bringing joy to people is like a very worthy thing to do. Yeah. I mean, yeah, it is like, because I, I noticed that like, if anyone's like excluded or something to me, that's, I'm seeing my brother in that because he obviously was excluded because he wasn't intellectually up to all the people his age. So to me, it's like, oh my gosh, like no one can feel like left out. That's my worst nightmare. So I'm like, no, no, we need to all come together. And it's just that because I saw it so much, I saw kids, you know, be mean to my brother, like, oh, you can't hang out with us, you know? Wow. I don't want to say the word, but like, they, they were, they were mean. Yeah. So yeah, I mean, I mean, I, I mean, taking those lessons with you into like, now that you grow into yourself and taking those lessons with you as you go about your businesses. Um, I think a lot of people will resonate with that and I think it will like differentiate you. Thank you. I'm excited to try it again. Um, but I will say one thing about my brother that is kind of cool. So this also draws me to filmmaking in a producing aspect is his favorite movie is Forrest Gump. And he doesn't really tell us necessarily why, but he's had Forrest Gump themed birthday parties. And when we put it on and it's so hard to get him to watch a movie. Like, I think he's only watched one of my movies in full because he's so particular about what he likes, but he gets the chair up, like right in front of the screen, and he's just locked in like eating his popcorn. But I mean, I, I know that he sees himself in that because his IQ is not as low as most special needs, but not obviously as high as a normal functioning person. So it's right in the middle. And I think he really connects with Forrest Gump because of that. Wow. And so it's it's been really cool. You know, I hope to one day make movies on that scale that reach people that some are hard to reach. Right. So that's why I always say I'm like, I know I'll be happy when I make a movie that my brother Matthew wants to get, like, watch the whole way through. That's amazing. Yeah. Um, can we talk about slaughterhouse for a moment? Just because I was on a trip to Panama recently for the first time with my brother in law was obsessed with this place. And they're showing us all these sloths. They're obsessed with sloths. And then I was like, let me see what she's most like. The first movie that kind of popped off and it's like, oh, gosh. And we had this little toy, uh, stuffed animal sloth that I brought home from Panama for my son. And it's like sitting there on the kitchen, like, looking at me. They're really cute. Yeah, they are pretty cute. But like, why do you think that movie resonated so much with people? Oh, man. I think it's because like sores are so cute and you. And then seeing one makes no sense. It makes no sense being. And then they're not fast. So it's how would a sloth kill a bunch of girls in a sorority, right? Yeah. I think it's just it's so outrageous that I think that's why it caught people's attention. But it was a cool shoe. I mean, we shot it in Serbia. Oh, gosh. Which is so random because I think it's based in Kentucky. So Kentucky. But we're in the middle of the jungle. Yeah. Panama. But it was a really super fun shoot. We were in Belgrade, Serbia, and that was my first time there. So, you know, it's like you get to go walk the streets. Everyone gets grocery, groceries for the day and the hotel was so nice and all the girls on it were awesome. Um, but yeah, I get killed by the sloths. So that was interesting because they have the, it's like a, a very expensive puppet on a stick on a, I think it was like a stick. And then they have the guy like lunging, you know, at me and it's the sloth on the stick. And then I fall into a mattress. And it was, we were shooting it at three a m I'm in Serbia getting killed by a sloth, getting killed by sloth. And I was just like, what? How did this happen? Yeah, I was like, because I didn't audition for that. The producer knew me on Instagram and messaged me, can you fly to Serbia? I think it was literally the next day or within two days. Can I like you comment? I was like, uh, I mean, I guess it was really quick, but I had to go like Covid test and get on a plane to Serbia, like the very next day. But did things change for you? Like, do you feel like that movie changed things for you? I think it it was a, it's more widely known and it had a theatrical release. So I think it, you know, gave me more skin in the game for indie filmmaking because I kind of have the lifetime thing right down. So definitely down. Yeah, definitely down. Yeah. So breaking into more indie filmmaking, I think it made people take me a little more seriously, maybe more seriously due to the slaughterhouse, to the slaughter. Yeah. Getting killed by the the way, I got killed by that sloth, like your revenge. Um, and then in writing and writing your, your recent book. So now you moved to, to a novel. I think it was timeless. Yeah. Um, I did find a, you know, a lot of parallels in that novel to maybe some of the things that happened in your life. Yeah. Were you like drawing from your existing self and writing the, the character are some. And no. I do the flashbacks where she has her doll special, but you know, her childhood is obviously very traumatic. I had a doll named special, but it wasn't. I wasn't clutching her in fear. You know, I had a very loving home, so. And then I take a kind of a thing at myself where I'm like, oh, the lifetime movies. Grace Patterson. Patterson. So I throw in and I throw in my mom's reimagined thing. So I throw in things like that. Um, but with that, I really did just want to kind of let loose and have fun because it wasn't like my life at all. You know, it's definitely more of a romance thriller. Um, but I like to read those type of books. Like I read a lot of Colleen Hoover. Frida McFadden. So I kind of just wanted to explore trying it. But I think when you're writing, you can't help but draw from for sure. Even if it's not an experience, maybe a feeling or, you know, then maybe you let that run wild. Like, well, what if this happened? And what if that was me? And then what if this happened? And then you've kind of put yourself in it. So you're sort of building on like you start with like a hypothetical and then you sort of build on it. Exactly. Yeah. Um, do you have like a daily, like your morning pages writer or are you just, I need to get back into it because I used to do the artist way and stuff like that. But, um, I'm more of a nighttime writer because I have bad insomnia. Yeah. What about you? Are you the opposite? The opposite for me? I'm a morning person. Really? At this point, yeah. Um, because once the day starts going. Yeah. Um, emails are coming in and and then we're off to, we're off to the races. Yeah. Um, but, and then, and then the poetry stuff like where does that, that, that was started that was like my first thing I started writing and it was just more self-expression where I would just jot down and they're easy to write because throughout the day, yeah, I would think of a line and then I would just keep going with it. So that, that I like, that's something I can do throughout the day. If I think of something, then I'll just jot it down because poetry has become a performance thing on TikTok. People will sit there reading poetry. Um, and, you know, apparently poetry as an art form really is meant to be shared, almost like singing in a way where it is, where it is kind of a performance. Yeah, yeah. And, and it's just a, you know, shorter form of self-expression. You know, I feel like if you nail the poem, it's you can get a lot out of it. Yeah, I think, I think people think of creativity as this thing that some people have. Yeah. And some people don't have almost like it gets doled out. Whereas in my view, anything that someone is doing is creative, even in business is creative. Yeah. Right. Like, I mean, part of my job as an attorney is like, I'm structuring like investment funds for people, right? That's a creative act in and of itself, like moving the pieces around, like what fits with what. Yeah. That's not in my mind. It's not really all that different than another form of creativity. It's just people's minds for some reason, are, you know, pulled in one direction versus another. And even in sort of envisioning how your life looks, right? Like how your house looks like, do you have kids? Right? That's all it's creative. It's manifestation. Creativity. Yeah. Even decorating your home, that's like a creative thing. Yeah. I think yeah, there's everybody's creative. It's just how much attention are you giving your creativeness and are you letting it expand? You know, because I think it's in everybody. But I think as you get older, it is kind of beaten out of you a little bit because everyone's like, oh, you need to, you know, be serious and do this. And it's like, no, like, think about when you were a kid, like what you liked and what you like to do. And, you know, the world was like limitless. So and there's also this like assumption that commercial viability or commercial success is now serious, right? So like, let's say you take two people, one of them goes out and does auditions, working their butts off, working their butt off. They could do something and it's not successful. Right. And then somebody else does the exact same thing and it's successful. You would never tell the person who had a successful experience and say, hey, you should give it up. It's a waste of time. Right. Would someone tell Taylor Swift, like the music thing? It's like, why are you wasting? It's not worth it. I'm sure people did tell her that, though, when she was starting, you know? Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. And in fact, they did. She, she, she sent, I think her like mixtapes or whatever places. And, and most people just ignored them. But she got one back that said, keep going. Yeah. Keep trying. You'll you'll get there. You know, I love that you hear that a lot though. Danielle Steel she had sent her book out for publishers and someone told her like, hey, you need to give up writing and focus on being a mom. Like you're not good at it. And now she's done like a million books and is so world famous. So I think, yeah, I mean, that's what happens, I think. Right? No one's like on the team or believes it until they see it. But that, to me, that's part of being a creative, is seeing it before it happens and feeling it before it happens. So if you are constantly thinking like, oh, it's not going to happen. You have to conquer your mind in that aspect because it is hard to visualize something that's not right in front of you. And not only visualize it, feel that you already are there living it and have it. I don't know if it was on diary of a CEO or a manifestation thing, but this guy, he had like three mansions now, but he said I felt the same when I was in my one bedroom apartment, because I would feel like I already had three mansions. So they were like, how does it feel to have all the success in Three Mansions? I feel the exact same thing. It's the exact same way. I already felt it, I already knew. So I think, but that's like tricky to trick your mind into feeling like you already have the success or, you know, because it's, it's scary to say out loud it is because everyone's like, they're crazy. They're delusional. Yeah. In a way, you are crazy. You're crazy. Yeah. Right. But like, you need to be a little crazy for sure. Like I was starring in movies in my head before I ever starred in a movie. You know, like that was it was already in my head. Right. And it actually makes sense because my family was like, oh, she wants to do this acting thing. That's so crazy and weird, but you gave yourself the permission. And I think like, people need to give themselves permission to do more than they think they're allowed to do. Yeah. Like I think plenty of people. And when I say plenty of people, it's funny. My father just like pops into my head who's like this like super creative guy. Yeah. And he could have written like tons of stuff and has who knows how many manuscripts there's like, not finished. But then you think like, oh, I need to do this like thing in the box. And one day, one day, and then one day becomes kind of never. Yeah. Unless you go out and do the thing because it is scary to put yourself out there, you know? I mean, I don't really have any formal training with writing really. So I just kind of was like, why can't I do it? Yeah. Why can't I do it? I like to read. Why can't I try to do this? It's just kind of. Yeah, I mean, but it is, it is scary because I think sometimes people with more talent are not doing it where if they did just put themselves out there, they would they're better than everybody actually doing it. They just need the audacity to put themselves out there, right? It's like you need the right mix of the talent and the audacity, right? There's plenty of people who are way more talented than any people that we have seen or know, but we'll never hear their works. Or, you know, if you go into any local church or synagogue or mosque or whatever, like there's people singing on a weekly basis who have incredible voices that nobody will ever hear for the simple reason of like, they don't think that it's worth their time or like that they're allowed to do it. Yeah. Um, so in like the one minute we have left, um, anything you want to say or leave people knowing about you or what? The floor is yours. Okay. I would just say, you know, have the audacity. Go try it. You don't need. There's never a perfect time. And the worst thing that's going to happen is like, you might fail, but you might learn from that failure. So I think put yourself out there and, you know, see yourself succeeding and doing it before it happens. And don't, don't let other people make fun of you or make you feel like you can't do something well. Thank you for spending the time with me, Grace. You really do light up a room. Um, and I think you're going to be going places. Thank you. You too. Thank you. If you enjoyed this conversation with Grace Patterson, please subscribe to our channel. For additional information and other guests, please visit our website, the bakery dot com. Thank you. Oh yeah, yeah I have I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm out of time. And I am playing. No more games. No more games. I'm.