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Rebbe Nachman didn’t come to make us “more religious.” He came to make us more real.
Rav Shlomo Katz opens the “treasure chest” of Rebbe Nachman’s Torah — teachings that heal the inner storm, settle the mind (yishuv hadaas), and draw down peace and truth into our homes, our relationships, and our own hearts.
Good morning everybody. Thank you for being here. Welcome back Shoshana. The month of Iyar is sponsored le'ilui nishmas נחום שמעון בן יצחק אריה, le'ilui nishmas בתיה פייגא בת ישראל and anonymously in memory of all the holy Chayalim that gave their lives and the ones who are working tirelessly to protect the land.
Ken yehi ratzon. Right. Yeah, we could pass these around, please. We haven't learned Rebbe Nachman in two weeks, maybe even three weeks, but it's always good to just jump right back inside.
Yeah, the same, I just don't have staples. The stapler ran out, so it's two it's two pages. So you can yeah, it's just whoever comes, give them two pages at once. I want to remind us what we're trying to do in these shiurim.
Trying to stay very loyal to the title we we gave, which is I think a path to tranquility and peace. That what we're trying to do in these shiurim is through the orchard of Rebbe Nachman of Breslov is to be able to get ourselves on with into a rhythm, not just to discover gems of Torah, but to get ourselves into an active rhythm of things that we would do on a daily basis that would produce a sense of yishuv hadaas, of settling of the mind. Of simply feeling, despite whatever's going on, an inner, what do they call it, Zen? Right? An inner calmness, an inner also quiet. This is what we're trying to do in these classes.
And we've seen many different teachings of the Rebbe that help us get to the point of yishuv hadaas, as the Rebbe told us in inside Likkutei Moharan that the reason why the world is so meshuga is really only because they don't have yishuv hadaas, they don't have the settling of the mind. And if one would have settling of the mind, then they would be able to ein sof tap into the neshamos, know what to do in this world, they would discover what they really want to do in this world vechein hala vechein hala vechein hala. And many different examples. But of course, the most practical eitzah, the most practical piece of advice for a person that's searching and trying to get to this nekuda, to this core of calmness of the mind, of settling the mind, there's no shortcuts.
Hisbodedus is where it's at. And the last shiur that we had produced the most amount of feedback we've had on any of the shiurim from you and from chevra that are learning with us online. The last thing that we learned from this sefer, Eshpoch Lefanav Sichi, from Rav Carmel alav hashalom, a whole sefer on hisbodedus was speaking about pouring out your heart before Hashem like the way you would speak to a good friend. Do you remember this? The Rebbe said, because the Rebbe when he revealed to Reb Noson the secret of hisbodedus, he ended off by saying והלאה טוב מאוד כשמשיחין הלב לפני השם כמו לפני חבר טוב אמיתי.
Basically, what Rebbe Nachman told Reb Noson was from here on now, vehala, all you have to remember is that it's so good when you speak, when you pour out the heart before Hashem in the manner in which you would pour out your heart before a good friend, a good and real friend, chaver tov ve'amiti. And we spoke about what that's what is that like to speak to a really good friend? What what do you what do you say, what don't you need to say when you're speaking to a really good friend? And there was a whole shiur just on that. We had a challenge, challenged everyone, tried to, to see who would take on fifteen minutes of hisbodedus. So even though I'd love to, this is the only thing I would love to reenact from high school and to like take take you know, like to see who מגיש את השיעורי בית, who brought in their homework or whose dog ate their homework vechulei to find out, because because lemaiseh, without practically doing what we're learning in this shiur, these Torahs just stay in the world of eitz hadaas, but they don't go into the world of eitz hachayim.
They're just tree of knowledge Torahs. As deep as they are, it's just tree of knowledge. But we're always attempting to take the learning that we're doing and to make it part of our tree of life that it actually makes us alive. So without even asking I already know from some of you in this room that you began to do this.
You began to do this, we said on fifteen minutes a day. I was being easy on everyone. What we're going to be seeing today is a question that many of you asked, which is, how do you start it? How do you start? What are you supposed to say? What are you not supposed to say? When you sit down to actually pour out your heart before Hashem, על פי תורת ברסלב, according to the shita in Breslov, how does it work? What's the... what are the functions? What are the...
what are you supposed to turn on and what are you supposed to turn off? Now we're going to see... Is there a Litvish approach to it? Maybe. So what you're going to see though is something that may make you feel that the fifteen minutes is a joke. So I'm already warning you that every dor, every generation has to deal with teachings in accordance with where they're at in this generation.
I think that to be able to find fifteen minutes in a day to do what we're doing is doable, and even that's not an easy task just because the way we're wired and because the rhythm of our lives. And as I mentioned the fifteen minutes a day to start with is not my hamtza'ah, that's Rav Arush's advice. I didn't make that up. But kamuvan, if someone says listen I need more time, like some of you said I thought fifteen...
I set the clock, I set the timer for fifteen minutes of pouring out my heart before Hashem, and I was so angry when the... when the alarm... so I said you know no one told you that like this is the only time you're not allowed to press snooze. You're allowed to go longer obviously.
Then sometimes you feel that you haven't even scratched the surface. But we're speaking about before you set the timer, before you even start. How do you prepare yourself to do hisbodedus in a manner that can... that can produce for us the rhythm that we are looking for, that we're so desperately looking for? So this is a beautiful, beautiful shiur and just continuing this...
this mahalach from this Rav Carmel alav hashalom. Told you he was a... he was a young man that passed... fifty-seven years old that had passed away just a few years ago.
And I think he was the grandson of רב לוי יצחק בנדר זכר צדיק וקדוש לברכה. So let's see how he helps us prepare for hisbodedus.
ההתבודדות הראויה היא שבתחילה לפני שפותח פיו ישב ויישב דעתו לפני מי הוא עומד ומה הוא רוצה לשאול מעמו. So this is already...
this is already an avodah. What's the avodah is that before you even... before you open your mouth you have to sit down and attempt to settle your mind. In what manner? You have to ask yourself the following questions: Do I realize before who I'm standing and what is it that I want to ask? What do I want to talk about? What do I want to talk about bechalal? Some people when they get into their room of hisbodedus like okay ten AM, ten PM, whenever your time is, now we're doing hisbodedus and you start.
Okay Hashem, and the hisbodedus is the least yishuv hadaas experience that you have because lo sidarta le'atzmecha, you didn't... you didn't prioritize, you didn't kind of like... you didn't prepare in your mind what is it that you actually want to... what is it that you want to speak about? So no...
sometimes that is exactly the topic of hisbodedus where you say to Hashem I would like to speak about the fact that I don't know what to speak about. That's also a topic. However quite often when you're in tune with yourself you realize there are plenty of things on the agenda, and when you do, when you take your time with yishuv hadaas, when we're going to see how long that... that process is pre-hisbodedus, then the hisbodedus flows, flows, then time flies.
So he's going to... we're going to see a piece here from Rav Noson in a second that emphasizes this.
מלבד הענין שיש ביישוב הדעת nisba'er belikutey halachos shehaderech hare'uyah hi shekodem shematchil ledaber ulvakesh. Before, according to Rav Noson, as we'll see in a second, before you start to speak and ask for whatever it is you're asking or share whatever you're sharing, ישהה איזה זמן בשתיקה to sit in...
to sit in silence for a few minutes.
ואז יתגעגע ויכסוף להשם יתברך and in those moments before like you know you're ready okay let's start being intimate with the Ribbono Ribono Shel Olam, and then you say to yourself, but I'm going to wait, I'm going to wait. That waiting process of sitting in silence can produce a tremendous, the words he uses are hitga'aguim ve-chisufim, like deep sincere longing for Hashem, and it's not just wild, it's not just okay, whatever. This reminded me of a story of when the Rebbe made it to America.
I don't know how many years, maybe you know how many years that he, him and his wife didn't see the Friediker Rebbe. But it was a period, it was a period of time, I don't know how long exactly. Ten years? No. Twenty years? Twenty years? Yeah, it was, I'm not sure, it was a tekufah, whatever it was, it was a period.
So it's said that the Friediker Rebbe knew that the Rebbe and his daughter made it to, they were there and the Rebbe didn't go see them, the Friediker Rebbe, they didn't see each other the first night bekavana. It could be even two days, I have to remember what I saw inside, because he wanted to have yishuv hadaas when that meeting, this is during World War II, when that meeting would take place. And for the more that something is more precious, you want to make sure that when you approach it, you're mamash there. There's so many weddings right now and I have the privilege of doing a lot of chuppas right now and I tell each couple, listen, we'll go over everything right now in the pre-meetings before the weddings and I'll tell you we're going to do this here and this here, and be'ezras Hashem you're not going to remember anything that I'm telling you right now because of the nature of being at a wedding.
But the only thing that I'm going to tell you now that I'm going to tell you again when we're under the chuppa is that I'm going to keep on bringing you back to be in the moment because you wait your whole life for a chunk of time that passes so fast with all eyes on you, especially with cameras in your face. And the last thing that most people are under their chuppa is present. And they waited their whole lives for this moment and they're not even there half the time because of a million different things. So all I really do with the chosson and kallah, not into the mic, just to them, I say just remember, remember, remember right now, remember it's you and you and the shechina, there's no one else here for real, it's just you guys, come back, come back.
And it happens all the time and it's no one's fault, it's just, it's mamash, this is a natural thing. Of course, and a wedding is a great example. Closeness, intimacy, and yet because there's so much kedusha available in the air, the Baal Davar, the other side will come in the way and try to distract. It's true by a wedding, it's also true when you actually approach hisbodedus.
You will see that hitnagduyos, oppositions that you never had to settling your mind, will all appear at once when you choose to actually sit down with the Ribono Shel Olam. So that's what Reb Noson says, when you stop and you're in silence preparing for this moment of actually letting it out, when you push back for a second, it makes yourself even have a deeper desire to make sure that you want to be present in the moment that's about to take place. And then he continues here in the third line of the second paragraph, ועל ידי זה יקבל את דבורי התפלה מהשם יתברך, and then you'll receive the right words from Hashem that you want to say. You're going to receive the right words.
Shtikel bitul is needed here to understand what he just said. It means you could have all the preparations of what you want to say, of what you want to leave for next session, but then there's this place of the proper hachana, the proper preparation that produces a to be a kli kibul, to be a receptor to Hashem saying listen, I see you really, you really want this and I want this too. Because you prepared yourself so much, I'm going to send you the right words. Did it ever happen to you that while you're davening or while you're talking or while you're learning, you realize this was not, this pashut was not me, it's my deepest, deepest me, but I didn't produce it, it's only coming through me.
I always say that in music when people reach that on stage, it's a very hard moment to, that's why so many musicians have such massive downfalls afterwards because it's very hard to relate back to a world... After you were channeling and it was just flowing me'atzmo, it's very hard to come back, be down here, and operate back with the normal way that we function. With hisbodedus it's very, very similar.
כי אם לא יעשה כן, we are in the brackets, because if you don't do it like this, the way we just described, אלא יתחיל לדבר מעצמו, rather you just start talking, נחשב הדבר לבחינת דוחק את השעה כמבואר שם, in another teaching in Likutei Halachos, what you're basically doing is dokhek es hasha'ah.
In this context, I believe it means you're- you're pushing the moment, you're just trying to squeeze it in, and it's what it's trying to do, the moment is trying to squeeze into you, and you're trying to squeeze into the moment and you just meet like this, which causes the opposite of yishuv hada'as. Yishuv hada'as is when there's no inner- there's no inner conflict. There's a resolution inside and there's a flow, and it starts to flow like a river. So now he quotes from Likutei Halachos: vezeh leshono.
This is from Reb Noson: כי כך היא הדרך האמת regarding anyone that wants to approach the holiness to come close to Hashem Yisbarakh, שהעיקר להרבות בתפילה ושיחה בינו לבין קונו. Yes, it's to make sure you speak a lot between you and your creator.
אבל גם זה בעצמו כבד מאוד and I love when Reb Noson gets so raw. Sometimes in the middle of teachings, he'll just be like, "Isn't this hard?" Like isn't- he's just described a beautiful thing and then he basically says, "Isn't this so hard?" And that's what it means over here.
אבל גם זה בעצמו כבד מאוד. But let's be real, to actually do hisbodedus, it's a heavy thing. It's a heavy thing. I know we get excited day one, day two could be murder, day three even worse.
Lakhen, since it's such a heavy thing, tzrikhim bitkhilah. Okay, now don't get startled, I told you this in the beginning of shiur, okay, because look what he says: לכן צריכים בתחילה לשהות שעה אחת לעמוד כאלם. Therefore we gotta spend an hour being like mute. You thought- did you think the eitzah he was saying was like, you know, like three minutes of silence? So Reb Noson's saying: no, no, no, it's an hour.
You're still sitting here, just waiting for the Rav Arush. Right. We're just adding that be'al peh, but you're not gonna get it from the sefer. So he says for it to be really like for that river to flow and to receive the words from Hashem and that's what comes onto the table of hisbodedus, then it needs to be an hour where you're basically in mute.
רק ישתוקק ויכסוף אליו מעומק לבו ברצון חזק, but you just continue to crave and long from the depth of your heart with such a strong will and desire, ויכין את עצמו לקראת השיחה בינו לבין קונו, and you prepare yourself for the conversation between you and your creator. It's such a funny thing because for most of us if we would actually do this and we would sit like this, the hisbodedus would start like before the hisbodedus because we would basically be saying Hashem I want so badly to be able to talk to you, I can't, you know, you have all these hakhanos but that itself becomes hisbodedus, that's why he's saying: no, no, no, stop and be in silence for a long time to just produce ratzon, to produce a craving will for it to get stronger and stronger and stronger.
ויצפה ויתלה עיניו למרום ויצפה el Hashem Yisbarakh בכדי שישפיע לו דיבורים חמים כגחלי אש in order so that like we said before that Hashem will bring down onto you words, like burning words like coals of fire, that are mamash coming from the warmth of the warmth. Veyeyashev atzmo hetev and you settle yourself down as much as you can, heikhanu ba'olam, where am I in the world, uleheikhan higi'a bema'asav, and where have I reached with my actions? This is what you're supposed to internally do before you even do hisbodedus.
Now, let's now Rav Arush it for a second because we need to- the point here is that there's an avodah lema'aseh, it's not just to know what older Breslovers did. It's for us to know what to do. So if you've taken on this inyan of fifteen minutes a day, that would mean in our equivalent of time over here, not fifteen minutes, let's say even just like- three minutes of settling your mind and getting calm and having a burning preparing to say I'm about to pour out my heart and soul before מי שאמר והיה העולם before the person that said let there be a world. Sorry, not the person, chas v'shalom, before the entity that said what? The creator.
Before Borei HaOlam, before the creator of the world. Me, the one, the one that's achrai right now for Iran and America and Lebanon and Gaza and the same one that's running that whole show is going to hear from little brother me and I have to believe in the Rebbe, in Rabbi Nachman, that said that Hashem can't wait to hear from me. I have to believe in that. So let me just sit still with where I'm at in the world and understand that I'm approaching an amazing amazing moment.
You know, if Chasidim prepare like crazy, the real Chasidim would prepare like meshuga for yechidus with their Rebbe or even for with the Lubavitcher Rebbe, even for dollars the preparation that a Chasid would go through to walk past the Rebbe for 20 seconds, 10 seconds to get a gaze. You know, this is על אחת כמה וכמה is it when you could really, really experience what it is to be with the Ribono Shel Olam. This is just reminding me of earlier this week on almost Lag BaOmer. Monday night? Monday night.
Monday night I had Monday afternoon I already decided that I'm not preparing at all to mekabel Rav Ginsburgh when he came inside here because I'd lose my keilim and I actually had work I had a lot of work to do that day. And I knew that if I actually thought about it I would lose it, I wouldn't be able to do anything. But then I realized that I'll miss out on being as present as I'd like to be if I didn't do any type of hachana. Any type of hachana.
And it did take longer a little bit, he came a little bit later than what was said, not too much later, but a little bit later and the niggunim Karduner was starting already upstairs. And I was supposed to wait for him in the office and listen to Karduner from upstairs. I hear the car I hear the car finally coming and parking up on the pavement over here and I was in these crazy worlds and I realized Hashem what do you want? I knew we were going to be kind of touching upon these teachings and it was just like a few minutes of grabbing a few minutes before something would happen to check in with myself.
עזוב את כל השאר forget everything else, hundreds of people upstairs and this Tzadik walking in here and this Tzadik singing niggunim.
Eifo ani? I know, I know where everyone else is. Eifo ani ba'olam? Where am I in all of this? Where am I in the world right now? And just checking in with myself for those few minutes created for me a much more conscious evening. Much more conscious evening on many on many levels. So this is again the prep for the real deal is just as important for the real deal and it shouldn't be overlooked, it should really be taken into account.
Mamshich leva'er, he continues to explain Reb Nosson on the bottom.
שבזמן הזה ששוהה יתחיל לחשוב כמה זקוק הוא לרחמי שמים. What should you do for our three minutes? Basically it's an 18-minute exercise what we're doing every day. It'll start like this, that when it gets and when there's commitment to it you'll see you're going to need a lot more time.
But he says over here that for those whatever time you're spending before the hisbodedus in silence, start to think how much rachamei shamayim you need.
מפני שהוא עדיין רחוק מאד מהשם יתברך because you're still very very far from Hashem. No one, no one, this is not a bad ma'ala by the way. When you realize that you're far from Hashem and then you get closer, you know what you realize right afterwards? That you're, I don't know, further, but that you're still very far.
But that's a good thing, because that when you understand the concept of the distance then it forces you to actually want a ratzon to get closer and closer. But if you're like, no, we're good, then you're not going to have such a craving to get close if you think you're okay. Yeah. No, I love what you're saying because I'd started a group of us like to do for 30 days 10 minutes a day.
And I'd started it saying like a challenge then I realized... it just felt so like only at nine minute thirty seconds like after all the talking did I reach like the layers right so at nine minute thirty seconds is when I was like I'm in it and even though the timer went off I felt like I just started. so what'd you do? I continued you know but but you know it does you know the layers that it feels from the beginning. but I think that's why he says it's got to be an hour.
yeah for sure I mean if it's for real right exactly because if it's for real if we're really doing this work then it can't be three minutes or ten minutes like if we're doing it real shebe real but if I told you the only way that you can come back to this class is if you do now two hours because one hour is pre-hisbodedus and an hour is hisbodedus I know no one will come back. but yesterday I literally sat there for two hours not saying anything the first time. really? and I said maybe a few words. but you're supposed to only not say anything for an hour.
I know I sat for two. wow. and in the in the forest and no joke I said like maybe four words and I think that was like the deepest. that's beautiful that's beautiful hitbodedus but I love that's why I'm like I felt guilty about it I'm like I didn't talk.
save save your guilt for other places in life not not for this one save it for when it really counts. okay turn the page kuf peh vav on the top he's going to continue to quote you from Reb Noson. now there's a danger when you ask when you do the pre-hisbodedus when you're checking in with where you're at in life right in your mind.
אך יזהר מאוד שהמחשבות האלו לא יפילו אותו ולא ייאשו אותו don't fall into the trap don't fall what's the trap the when I start asking real questions I'll give my my perverted real answer right the the self-persecuted answers like that you got to be very careful from that.
it's almost like we're all like on most of anyone that's like hanging out in these kind of classes is prone to like immediately go to this place when we ask ourselves these deep questions heichan ani baolam we almost immediately go to dark places אסור אסור אסור אסור אסור. what do you what do you mean by that self-perverted like what do you mean? meaning it's a perversion of the truth people say in the name of being real like someone was in the office yesterday and they were they kept on speaking about like like being real and the the vibe I was getting was that their understanding of being real is only when it's like when like real talk when you really tell someone how much they they bother you. negative yeah it's just negative. that's what I'm saying about a perversion of truth.
the perversion of being authentic. why isn't it real when you tell someone I love you? why isn't it that real? why why isn't that considered as real and as raw as when someone says you know you really hurt me? so Reb Nachman and Reb Noson of course understand this to be a truth say people fall into this trap all the time in the name of being authentic and being real that it's generally has negative connotations. so Reb Noson is saying when you approach hisbodedus for those few minutes before and you start asking yourselves these questions heichan ani baolam and I'm still very far what may happen is that you start to self-identify with that type of thinking and that like you start and it starts to grow more and more and you start having negative thoughts about yourself. that's not the purpose the purpose isn't to come to hisbodedus like a shlepper.
even someone that comes to the conclusion like he said how much I need rachmei shamayim that's not a shlepper. that's a very rich person with daas. that's actually a very wealthy knowledgeable person that understands that they know what they need in order to make it in this world. a shlepper is someone that has no idea what they need to make it in this world.
so Reb Noson's saying stay away from that. what does rachmei shamayim mean? mercy rachamim from shamayim rachamim from shamayim. so again אך יזהר מאוד שהמחשבות האלו לא יפילו אותו ולא ייאשו אותו ולכן יתחזק בנקודות הטובות שיש בו you gotta azamra yourself before the hisbodedus. the point is not to show up like a shlepper even if that's what you're feeling.
that's not the point that's not what's going on over here. The point is to gain yishuv hadaas and there's a big difference between the two.
ולכן יתחזק בנקודות הטובות שיש בו ובזכות הצדיקי אמת שעליהם ועל הבטחתם נשען בקיום עצתם. And then you say to yourself and no matter how low I've fallen or what I think about myself, what I'm about to do is taking counsel from a tzadik.
That says a lot about me, that this is the person that I've become, no matter what's going on in my life, no matter regardless of the other areas that generally bring me down, here I have to stop and be like what I'm engaged with right now is holy counsel that came from the mouth of a holy tzadik 200 and something years ago. That's gotta count for something about where I am in life, right? That's a nekuda tova to lean on.
עצת ההתבודדות שבוודאי ימליצו טוב בעדו. I'm taking on hisbodedus right now.
And for sure when they look down from shamayim and they see how maybe they'll look at my maasim and see how far I could be from where I really am, this moment that I'm doing right now will be a big brownie point for me. Because they see that no matter what's going on, this is what I've chosen to be misasek with.
ובעיקר על רחמי השם שאין להם סוף. And also you have to remember Rav Nosson says the rachmim of Hashem have no end.
The mercy of God is infinite, it's endless.
כי הוא שומע תפילת כל פה ומושיע לכל החוסים והבוטחים בו. Hashem listens to the heart, listens to the prayer of every mouth and he brings salvation to all those that find refuge and trust in him. And then Rav Nosson continues: ויעמוד לפני השם כעני כדל ורש.
And then as you approach hisbodedus you stand there like a person that is filled with poverty.
ולא יתלה בזכויותיו ובמעשיו. You don't come to hisbodedus and say what I'm about to tell you right now is big things Hashem, but you know how much tzedaka I gave last week and you know how much of a shmiras hapeh I've been using lately and how much I've overcome many different things and how much I'm such a big person so only you know all the good things that also you don't you go to a place of saying right now I got nothing but a desire to want to be one with you, that's all I have. You can't depend you shouldn't be not depend but lo yitleh bizchuyosav means don't bank rely yeah don't rely on even good things that you've done.
It's not about getting too deep into the bad things and it's not about boasting over the good things that you've done either. It's just to produce a person that has enough koach to stand before Hashem and be real. That is the whole purpose of the hachana, of the preparation for hisbodedus. So second paragraph: ויעמוד לפני השם כעני כדל ורש ולא יתלה בזכויותיו ובמעשיו רק בחסד השם.
I'm only depending what this experience right now just on your chasadim Hashem if you enable it to be.
ובהיותו חנון ורחום ארך אפים ורב חסד. And I know you're so merciful. I know that you've basically through Moshe Rabbeinu bringing down the revelation of the י"ג מידות הרחמים that lasts forever, the thirteen attributes of mercy.
And then Rav Nosson says and when you tune into that: ועל ידי זה יתעוררו רחמי השם עליו ויתחיל לדבר מעט. Then the compassion of Hashem will awaken upon you and then you'll start to speak just a little bit.
כפי מה שישלח לו השם דיבורים. Only as much as Hashem sends the words into your mouth.
עד שיזכה וימשכו לו דיבורים חמים כגחלי אש. In the beginning you start to feel that you're really just a funnel for the words to come through you but when you continue with that suddenly what will start to happen is that you'll start to get kegachalei eish, burning coals of fire. It's very interesting the image the audio that I have over here right now is almost every I've done this many times almost every shiur of Weinberger because the beginning is always very very soft and then And you hear someone that's like this and it's like this crazy, it's the same exact shiur. It's the same, it's not a different shiur.
It's the same shiur, the same setting. And I know that they do this in public speaking classes where they do discuss the whole chup of the engaging of a crowd where you go up for a really high thing at the end and then you come and you bring it down after the end and that's, we're not talking about that. We're speaking about like this, that in the beginning it's the rachamim rachmei Hashem, that words should come through me that are sent from you but eventually it builds up towards gechalim, towards burning coals that the words come out so fiery and passionately. And I think that's, that would be a way to know was this my hisbodedus or yours.
Like how do I know at the end of a hisbodedus if it was really, if it was for real or not, if it was Hashem sending the words through me or was it just me trying to say I did hisbodedus? Lighter, because otherwise you're holding everything inside and it's all on you and once you let it out it's like יכול להיות יותר קליל בחיים. What other word would you use besides lighter? Freer. Freer, relieved. Settled? More settled? More, I guess more true, just more, more true.
Yeah. Connected? I want to say that there's two, yeah, like what's the aspect of the words coming from a very deep place and like sort of taking all the shmutz and you know like it gets expelled with those words like so freer, lighter. But I feel like also this piece of כפי מה שישלח לו השם דיבורים is like that there may be words that you need to hear, that's why it needs to be in verbal format, that you're almost hearing things that Hashem is telling you and you need to hear them, they're not coming from you, they're coming from him and you wouldn't have heard them otherwise. A million percent.
This nekudah you brought up right now is we're going to see it, we've spoken about it once, twice, but this is going to be a very, very critical piece of hisbodedus. The point is not just to feel freer and lighter. It's this nekudah of there's certain things, this is such a deep teaching, you know there's certain things that all the Rabbanim in the world could tell me and yet I can't hear it from anybody. I can only hear it from Hashem.
But since we don't live in a world like, Nachman asks me this all the time, like how come Hashem doesn't talk to us? For some reason it's, for me it's painful, it's because I'm not really, it's not a painful question, it's a beautiful question but it's a, it's one that demands real answers. But he does. When does he? When we do hisbodedus like this, chevra. I'm just going to say it straight out.
When you do hisbodedus like this, then what ends up coming out from you, you're aware that it's not you. You're aware that it is Hashem said, 'Ah, you've cleansed, you've cleansed, you've cleaned out the funnel, you've cleaned out the tunnel, the tzinor, the pipe, you've cleaned it out, now there's room for me because there's less of you, you got bittul hayesh, ah, now I could speak. How does it, what's the hisgalus?' That's what Rebbe Nachman says, that hisbodedus is a bechinah of Ruach Hakodesh because there's space now for Hashem to let you know that there's certain words you need to hear and they can only come from Hashem and the way that Hashem appears is through your voice, through your own voice. And that's, there's no greater dveikus.
It's not really joy, it's joy, it's everything, but it's really yishuv hadaas. That's really what it is. It's a, this is the most settling of the, people that hear God's voice then they become freaked out and then you run away from them because our... Our minhag basically is that when you hear God's voice through your hisbodedus, there's nowhere to run.
You don't want to run anywhere. This is, you'd stay in that place forever. Like Reb Shlomo explained once what's the what's the concept of holiness. Someone that does a holy act is someone that was willing to do what they're doing forever.
If what you're willing to do is just okay I'm good for it for now but I'm it's okay if it ends, means it wasn't so holy. Like if you're really davenin, really really davenin, then the holier the tefillah is, the more you know you could it could last forever. But the more you're still conscious of the fact that okay this is what's happening now then there's something happening later like a holy friendship, a holy conversation. Holy conversation is one that could last forever.
There was this boy came in yesterday trying to likboa pegisha for a few months and it didn't happen and he came in yesterday and it was one of those meet- it was one of those conversations where you're like you really really wish there wasn't someone waiting outside the door. It was one of these flowing conversations, one of these big neshamos just came back after many years in chutz la'aretz. So that's like a holy conversation because you wish it could continue going forever. Like some of- whatever not to put us down but some some parents if you remember some of you to do Shema with your children wasn't so holy because you wanted to get it done as soon as possible.
And then sometimes bechasdei shamayim you have nights that you never want Shema to end. It's not so- doesn't happen that often but when it does that's a taste of like of that. And in those moments like hisbodedus when you don't want it to ever end that's because you're receiving everything you desire to receive from this world which is yishuv hadaas and to know what Hashem wants to tell you and that it's channeled through you. Awesome.
Like what does it do to you when you realize that Hashem is channeling through you what He wants of you? What does that do to you? What middah would you say like what who do you become? Can I add something? I think also when you come in from that mindset if you start your day off in that mindset you also realize that everybody around you and everyone who you meet Hashem's playing in front of you. Like He's talking to you throughout the whole day. He's playing the right words you go to the right shiur you hear the right words that day like everything that's that you're trying to figure out it's throughout the whole day you see it. Like the right it's all falling into place.
So a segulah for what you're saying and the calendar for when this happens the most is during Sefirat HaOmer. Because the Rebbe writes in the towards the end of Likutey Moharan that if a person had really good ears during Sefira they could hear that anything that anyone is talking about anywhere in the world has to do with the sefirah of that day. Like if our ears were in tune then we could hear that the whole world is speaking today by Malchus shebeHod. Every conversation.
So I want to say now like so how do you get to a place that you have ears like that? Like this. Then it becomes then you know. Yeah. Yeah.
And inyan of it is because like you say like silence in the beginning. That's what he said, yeah. No, I'm wondering because like for me it's like I need silence after because that's when I'm like okay now I've said I've poured my heart like let me let me make space for You to speak to me I'm listening now. Nachon.
Nachon. And I realize like in the Amidah it says at the end like before you take three steps forward Nachon stop and like take it in. Yeah, for sure. I've been doing that lately but I'm like oh that makes sense.
Let's see what he says if if that's an instruction. Because up until now it's just about prep. Right right right. Just right now it's prep.
Okay let's finish this.
וכפי גודל ההשתוקקות שכוסף להשם in accordance to the longing that they have for Hashem כן יזכה להתעוררות והתלהבות ודיבורים so too you will merit an awakening passion and words that are in the aspect שהם בבחינת רשפי רשפי אש שלהבת יה like Shlomo Hamelech says in Shir Hashirim that the flame, the fiery flame, the flame of God כמו שכתוב כי עזה כמות אהבה על ידי זה זוכין למה שנאמר בהמשך הפסוק רשפי רשפי אש שלהבת קה.
לכל זה צריך להקדיש זמן. So Reb Noson says, doesn't this, I mean the Tzaddik, Rav Carmell is saying, doesn't all this sound beautiful? But what's more beautiful than what we just described? Nothing.
But you know what? It takes time. These things don't happen automatically. It's dis- yeah, it's a and it's discipline.
לכל זה צריך להקדיש זמן וצריך לקחת את זה בחשבון כחלק מהזמן של התבודדות.
And you have to take this into accounting time-wise as time of your hitbodedut. Now, I either this either strengthened you or weakened you because what he's showing over here is that you need more than just those 15 those 15 minutes for this kind of talk. You need you need a little bit more than that. You'll decide.
You're all big girls. You will decide. You also need time to learn about hitbodedut, like I been with Reb Leibish we've been going through the book One. Oh, what a great sefer.
Achad. Oh great, everybody should know that book. It's in Hebrew, Achad, and English. And it it talks about the reciprocity of the relationship.
Nachon. But you have to learn, in addition to the time doing it, you have to learn. You have to learn. That's, yeah, you have to learn how to do this.
So that's part of the prep and then the other part of the prep is the prep itself which we're trying to discover what's the best that would work for us. Now, hamakor, just the source for this inyan of a whole hour before hitbodedut is not something that Reb Noson made up.
המקור ללשונו של מורינו ר' נתן לשעה אחת נלקח מדברי רבינו שהובא בשיחות הר"ן. This actually came from Rabbeinu himself, where in Sichot Haran it says: סיפר לי האיש הנ"ל שרבינו ציווה שיהיה לו התבודדות שתי שעות ביום.
Someone said the Rebbe told him that he should do two hours of hitbodedut every day.
שעה אחת שיילך וישתוקק ויכין עצמו לדבר ויערוך ליבו לכך. Which is exactly what we said. One hour he he should go and and long and prepare himself to speak and prepare his heart for it.
ואחר כך ידבר להשם שעה אחת. And then he'll go and speak to Hashem for one hour.
הנהגה זו היא האופן המובחר ביותר להקדיש שעה להכנת התבודדות. He's saying this is obviously like the only person I know that ever did something like this is Nissim Black.
He shared with me he would he would do hours of hitbodedut. The truth is I don't know if though if he did an hour maybe he just did hours of talking. I don't know. I I actually don't know anyone that I know of that that is like this where there's an hour of prep of producing longing and then starts the talk.
אך צריך לדעת שלא כל אדם יכול לקיים את ההנהגה הזו. Thank you Rav Carmell. Not everyone can do this.
ולכן מה שציווה רבינו הוא להקדיש להתבודדות לפחות שעה אחת שבה ישב ואחר כך ישפוך לבו לפני השם כמבואר בליקוטי מוהר"ן וזה לשון רבינו.
So now just we're going to end here with learning some words about everything we said from Rabbeinu himself. Amar. The Rebbe said, this is from Likutei Moharan the second part, Torah Tzadik Vav. This is in Tinyana, Torah Tzadik Vav.
Amar.
אמר שרצונו שיהיה לנו כל היום התבודדות ולבלות כל היום על זה. Rabbeinu said his ratzon was that we should be in hitbodedut all day long and spend your whole day with this.
אך לא כל אדם יכול לקיים זאת.
But not every person could live like that.
על כן בהכרח לצוות להם שיהיה להם על כל פנים איזה שעה התבודדות. You see for Reb Noson to say an hour is basically him going down from 24 to 1. It's not from 6 to 1, it's from 24 to 1.
Like it's a big hanachah already. It's a it's a tremendous sale what he's doing, it's a big amazing discount. At least he says, כי גם זה טוב מאוד. Even if you get to one hour, that's also very good.
It's like saying it's also cute. And we feel so good about 15 minutes, but it's because it's because yeah, you should feel amazing about 15 minutes. You should feel incredible. In our days, nachon, nachon, nachon.
We're really trying to לחזק את העניין של של הכמות הקטנה שאנחנו מדברים עליו. But then the Rebbe says like this: אבל מי שלבו חזק בהשם, but one whose heart is strong with Hakadosh Baruch Hu, ורוצה לקבל עליו עול עבודתו יתברך באמת, and you want to accept upon yourself the yoke of being a servant of Hashem for real, רצונו שיהיה לו כל היום התבודדות, then his ratzon should be that he should be in hisbodedus all day, veyazkir divrei Chazal, and of course you've probably thought about this already and Rav Nachman mentioned the famous Gemara in Brachot, הלואי שיתפלל אדם כל היום כולו. What's harder? To davven all day out of a siddur or to do hisbodedus all day? I think to davven, both. Well I'll ask you differently: what's harder? To davven for 15 minutes from a siddur or to do hisbodedus for 15 minutes? Hisbodedus, hisbodedus.
To davven for, okay, okay, to davven for an hour from a siddur or to do hisbodedus for an hour? Hisbodedus. I think davvening because it's hard to understand. At a certain point davvening becomes harder. Because your ratzon, yeah, because your ratzon, see, once, once it starts to flow, like once, once you're in the program, okay? Once you're in the program, people have spoken about this that davvening becomes a rote? Like a template? Being forced upon you? Yeah, davvening becomes hard.
Davvening, actually davvening, it becomes a very interesting thing. Halevai we should reach that level, we'd have to do a shiur on that. Yeah. You understand what I'm saying? Halevai we should, we should get to a place that we have to give ourselves koach to figure out how to davven again from a siddur.
וכן כתב בחיי מוהר"ן, and this is in Rav Nachman's sort of biography, it says like this, Rav Nosson writes, פעם אחת היה מדבר עמנו, one time he was speaking with us, the Rebbe was speaking with us, והיה מרבה לדבר אז מענין מעלת התבודדות, and he just went off on hisbodedus and how awesome it is.
והיה מפליג מאוד בשבח מעלת גדולה הנהגה זו, he kept on speaking about how exalted this hanhaga is.
ואמר שאי אפשר לצוות לאנשים שינהגו הנהגה זו כי אם שעה אחת ביום, the most you could tell people is one hour a day, כי אי אפשר להכביד עליהם יותר, because you can't, like we're saying before, you can't make it too hard for them.
אבל באמת היו צריכים שיהיה להם כל היום התבודדות, so again another source to show us that Rav Nachman's ideal way of living is to be in this state all day long.
ולכן גם מי שמקדיש רבע שעה, it's not what it says but I'm saying it over here, יקדיש זמן ניכר לעמידה זו נוכח פני השם, לגעגועים וכיסופים, להכנה לדיבור ושפיכת הלב, ליישוב דעתו היכן הוא בעולם, לרחמנות על נפשו, ולהתחזקות בנקודת הטוב שבו בזכות הצדיקים, ובתליית עיניו לרחמי השם שאין להם סוף. So he says, there is one thing to ask that you could actually ask for verbally before you start doing hisbodedus.
בזמן זה יש לו לבקש מעומק לבו ה' שפתי תפתח ופי יגיד תהלתך. That's beautiful.
He's saying, in this time pre-hisbodedus, the one thing you should be asking for from the depth of your heart is Hashem open up my, my mouth so that I can say your praises. Ten li diburim. That's why Shmuel has a beautiful song Ten Li Tefillah. You know that song? It's so, the words, give me a tefillah, Hashem.
That's in the prayer we say the whole month of Elul. That's exactly the words. In Elul? Yeah, one thing I ask, Achat Sha'alti, right? Yeah, but there we don't, we ask for different things. No, but we have that line.
Yeah, Achat Sha'alti. No, this you say before Shemoneh Esrei. Yeah. You're speaking about something else.
Yeah. Achat Sha'alti.
תן לי דיבורים מעומק קדשך מן השמים, give me, give me words from your, from your heavenly abode, בכדי שאוכל לרצות ולפייס אותך, so that I can appease you, lehodot uleshabei'ach otcha, to praise you and to thank you, ולשפוך את כל אשר בלבי לפניך, and to pour all that's in my heart before you.
יש לדעת שדברי מורינו רב נתן שכתב שאין להתחיל ולדבר אלא להמתין שהשם יתברך ישפיע לו דיבורים מן השמים, please know that what Rav Nosson wrote, that you shouldn't start to speak, but you're supposed to wait until Hashem gives you words from heaven, אין כוונתו לומר שכשבאים לשפוך שיח לפני השם...
יש להגיע ללא כיוון ורצון מסוים או שאין לחשוב כלל מה נושא שרוצים לעסוק בו ולדבר עליו. Don't think for a second that he means over here that you shouldn't have any kivun of what you want to speak about and don't think bichlal about the topic of what you want to speak about. And you don't have the last paragraph is on the last page, you don't have it because the Rebbe writes in Likutey Moharan that you have to take one middah, ask rachamanus on it from Hashem that you should merit to purify and refine yourself from that one middah. Take one middah that you want to focus on as the Bavli says you can't work on two middos at the same time.
Take one middah that you want to focus on and only that should be the prayer through each hisbodedus of like, at least in the beginning, this is what I want to focus on.
כמו כן כתב רבינו שצריך ללכת ולעבוד את השם עם תורה ומעלה זמן של כמה חודשים שכל עסקו ותפלתו יהיה בעניין זה. Now this is already, this is big leagues. What he's saying over here is that when you tap into hisbodedus and you start to discover something about yourself and you have a ratzon to really conquer this middah that is irking inside of you, you have to walk around with it for weeks and months.
It's not, you don't knock things off in hisbodedus. It's not an, that's not how it works. You come back to tomorrow differently. You daven over it differently.
You learn about it differently. It's a process. This is a, זה לא הולך כך. And then Rebbe Nachman writes in Likutey Moharan 34 that you have to daven over the nekudah hashayeches lilibo while you're talking to Hashem about a big thing you have to ask Hashem, but the nekudah that shayach to me from this parshah, please reveal it to me.
I don't know if I'm making myself clear. This is very important. Truth is, this should be a whole shiur on its own. Maybe it will be.
Meaning, sometimes I can get into hisbodedus, I could start talking about something that I'm going through and it may involve a lot of details and a lot of different and a big picture in order to illustrate the situation. But Rebbe Nachman says you have to daven to Hashem to stay focused on what's the nekudah from here that shayach to me. What happens to us quite often is that we've discovered what's the nekudah that shayach to him and to her and to them and we feel like we're ge'onim and maybe we are actually. We could help a lot of people because of our hisbodedus.
But that's that's not your hisbodedus, it's theirs. That's why you have to daven that the place that it shayach for me, what I'm supposed to learn about what I'm about to talk about should be revealed to me, should be clear to me. Is that, is that a little bit clear or not so much? Very convincing. Like what's, what's my piece to work on right now from the story? From the story that is coming through me.
There's a lot of people involved. There's a lot of different things going on. I may get a lot of clarity about a lot of different things, but what is my, why did this come up for me? What's, what's the nekudah that shayach for me to be aware of from the story that's coming through me right now? That's something big to daven over. That's from Likutey Moharan Lamed-Dalet.
Okay, be'ezras Hashem we'll continue this next week. Yasher koach. Gut Shabbos.