Subscribe
Share
Share
Embed
This episode integrates the Senior Warden function through personal and practical examples that show what happens when closure is insufficient or avoided. The focus is on preparing for the close before work begins, and on how poor closure disrupts transitions in families, relationships, and life stages.
🔑 Key Takeaways
- Closure failures create difficulty for whatever comes next.
- Commencement without adequate preparation leaves people unready.
- Unclear intent at the start undermines the ability to close cleanly.
- Many interactions are experience-driven, not task-driven.
- Avoiding closure shifts the burden to others and damages trust.
💬 Featured Quotes
- “We’re wrapping up this week on the senior warden conversation with some real challenges that I’ve experienced personally with the idea of closure.” (0:00–0:07)
- “That closure part of the conversation, if not done well, essentially creates a real difficulty for the next generation to start or the next phase to start.” (1:00–1:08)
- “In situations where I have not been clear about what I want going in, the relationships don’t close the way they’re supposed to.” (1:16–1:24)
- “How do we know that we’ve had a good experience or how do we know the work is done, you never get to it.” (1:45–1:51)
- “On the back end of it, I just kind of felt listless and frustrated.” (1:54–2:01)
- “If you can prepare for the close before you start, that’s the best.” (2:09–2:17)
- “Try and come up with a definition of what it is that you were trying to accomplish.” (2:24–2:28)
- “A lot of the way we interact is experience driven.” (2:39–2:41)
- “Think about the experience you were trying to create and were you able to create that experience?” (2:41–2:46)
- “A lot of guys get this wrong… in the dating context.” (3:02–3:12)
- “They’ll just kind of fade out and ghost.” (3:18–3:25)
- “That’s awful for everyone because you don’t get that strong sense of closure.” (3:25–3:32)
- “Helping yourself figure out how to close could be a good next step for you moving forward.” (4:09–4:19)
- Tim Dedman
- Jorge
Creators and Guests
What is A Mason's Work?
In this show we discuss the practical applications of masonic symbolism and how the working tools can be used to better yourself, your family, your lodge, and your community. We help good freemasons become better men through honest self development. We talk quite a bit about mental health and men's issues related to emotional and intellectual growth as well.
We're wrapping up this week on the senior warden conversation with some real challenges
that I've experienced personally with the idea of closure.
There are some real tough times ahead for you as a parent if you have younger children
in that commencement process in high school.
It's different for every child.
We'll put it that way.
And in my case, my kids are not making the transition well.
The commencement ceremony that they went through was kind of insufficient
perhaps to set the stage for what was coming.
And one could argue that that was different in your day and age and certainly
different in mind.
But that closure part of the conversation, if not done well, essentially creates a real
difficulty for the next generation to start or the next phase to start or the next part
of the system.
I can tell you personally as well that like in situations where I have not been clear
about what I want going in, the relationships don't close the way they're supposed to.
So I would start with, for example, and we talked about this a little bit last week,
with the whole nice guy thing, I would start with positive sort of prosocial behaviors,
not being clear about what my intent is.
And then the closure part of that, how do we know that we've had a good experience
or how do we know the work is done, you never get to it because it didn't really,
wasn't clear on my expectations walking in.
So on the back end of it, I just kind of felt listless and frustrated perhaps.
So again, when you're doing this, the closure side of stuff, I will encourage you,
if you can prepare for the close before you start, that's the best.
If you can't do that, absent that, when it comes time to consider closing,
try and come up with a definition of what it is that you were trying to accomplish,
what it was the experience you were trying to create, what was the outcome you were driving towards.
I will tell you most of the time, unless you're literally physically building something,
a lot of the way we interact is experienced driven.
So think about the experience you were trying to create and were you able to create that experience?
If so, it's time to consider closing that out and honoring the work that you did so that you can
move on to the next phase, whatever that might be. A lot of guys get this wrong kind of two in the
dating context. They're avoidant of the closure and it damages the relationship. You'll see it,
you know, guys don't want to say, well, we're done or we don't want to see anymore,
they'll just kind of fade out and ghost, which is awful for everyone because you don't get that
strong sense of closure or they will kind of wait for things to just get so bad that somebody
else does the closure for them. And that's, I can speak to that from personal experience,
from multiple decades ago, this is a thing that folks that don't understand that senior
warden well or that role of closure very well are prone to do. So look for those situations in
your sort of private reflection and maybe in conversations with your colleagues at lodge or
in your friend group or whatever and see if that's a recurring theme for you or for any of your
colleagues, maybe helping them figure out how to close or helping yourself figure out how to close
could be a good next step for you moving forward.