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Pull up a seat at our table, where badass women from all walks of life—fashion, beauty, design, music, philanthropy, art, and more—come together to share honest stories, serve truths, and dig into the realities of modern womanhood.
Johanna Almstead:
Hello everyone. I am menu planning for my next guest, and I'm feeling the fall vibes. I'm also excited because she's as passionate about entertaining and hosting as I am, and so I think it's going to be really fun. I'm going to start out with a couple little crostinis. I'm going to do a fig and ricotta crostini and a little bit of artichoke and fresh herb crostini because the meal is quite heavy. And so I'm going to start with just a little light, fresh, veggie-driven. I think I'm going to start with those. I'm going to do like a Hugo Spritz. I feel like a Hugo Spritz is nice because it is not fully summer. It can go into fall. And then for dinner, I'm going to go hearty, delicious, cozy, braised short rib. So I'm going to cook these things for hours with some red wine and fresh herbs and some really good stock in there.
And I'm going to serve that over a creamy polenta with just a big old green salad on the side. And with that, I'm going to open a nice big juicy Bordeaux from Saint-Émilion, one of my favorite places. For music, I've been listening to Chaka Khan again recently, which is so fun. I'm going to do a little Chaka Khan. I'm going to do a little Amy Winehouse. I'm going to do a little Fela Kuti, and just going to have the vibes good. I'm going to light some candles. I'm going to make sure it's all groovy. My next guest is such a dynamo. She is so smart, so driven, so organized, so passionate about what she does, and I can't wait for you guys to meet her. So let's dig in.
Hello everyone and welcome to Eat My Words. I am so excited for this conversation today because I think I'm going to learn a lot. I feel like I'm going to learn so many tips and tricks. It's going to be great. I can't wait for you to meet my guest today. She began her career in the esteemed Page Program at NBCUniversal. She has helped capture your favorite Real Housewives on Snapchat, and she founded a small supper club called To Be Hosted in 2017 that would go on to foster deeper conversations and connections among the tastemakers of New York City, and has grown to provide event production services to an elite clientele, including brands like Pinterest, Spotify, Peloton, and Pepsi. She also created While Entertaining, an indie print magazine that turned Substack, where she shares stories and tips from her world of party planning. She's also a first-time author of the book, Your Turn to Host.
Here we go. We have it here, Your Turn to Host. It's so pretty, which was just released this past summer. She is a wife, she's a friend, she's a gatherer and a connector. Amber Mayfield Hewett, welcome to Eat My Words.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Thank you for having me. What an introduction.
Johanna Almstead:
I mean, you did it all. I just say it. Thank you so much for being here. I know you have a really, really busy day and a really, really busy life. So I'm always very appreciative when people take the time to sit down and talk to me.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes. I'm so excited to be here and chat about all the things.
Johanna Almstead:
All the things. So I want to talk about your book and I want to talk about your hosting philosophy, but first I want to start back at the beginning. Tell me where you would say your journey began.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. I will say my entertaining journey and my party planning journey really began when I was working at NBCUniversal. I was working for Bravo TV and Oxygen as an assistant in the digital department. And working in television, you go to all of these networking events and very buzzy, glamorous places, but I just always felt like something was missing. So I started hosting a supper club on the side after work, just as a little side hustle to learn how to plan events, meet more interesting people in the industry, and it just rolled out of control from there. So it all really starts with a dinner party.
Johanna Almstead:
All starts with a dinner party. I love that. This podcast started with a dinner party too. Okay. So tell me a little bit about what being in the Page Program was like, because I feel like there's literally TV shows made about this. So I want to know what that was like.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. It was really interesting because in college I studied public relations and I thought that I was going to be a publicist. And when I graduated and got a few internships, I quickly realized that I did not want to be a publicist. I'm in fact way too candid for that. So I had to figure out what else I wanted to do. And the Page Program was this really unique opportunity to rotate around a company and be in a bunch of different departments. You could do assignments in marketing, in production, in corporate social responsibility, in events and all of these things. So that was really the draw for me alongside just being a fan of Bravo and Googling before there was ChatGPT, how do you get a job at Bravo? And this Page Program came up as the best way to get an entry-level role in television.
So it was certainly an interesting experience. At the time, it was not a very diverse program. So I had some friends that really took me under their wing and helped me acclimate to corporate culture and introduced me to more and more people. And they're still my dearest friends today. So I'm grateful for the community that you get out of it. And of course, everything I learned while I was there. There's a much bigger and more evolved program these days, which is really exciting to watch, but even back then it had a lot of charm for being in the program.
Johanna Almstead:
How do you get into the program? You have to apply? Is it like applying for a job?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes. And I don't know what you have to do these days, but back then, because this was now over 10 years ago. So back then you had to do an interview or you had to submit your resume, of course, and answer a bunch of questions. And then you went into a series of interviews that included a presentation. I remember coming to New York and presenting to three or four people and trying to explain what about the Page Program was interesting to me and what I wanted to learn. And then it took a while. They used to bring people in in different cohorts. So for a while I didn't think I got in. And then one day I was interning at a PR company and I got the email that I had gotten in and that was all she wrote.
Johanna Almstead:
Amazing. And where were you living before that?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
So I always grew up in New York. I lived in Rockland County growing up, so I was just living at home and commuting to the city. It was a very long commute, but a girl's got to do what a girl's got to do.
Johanna Almstead:
Got to get that hustle on.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Exactly. And then when I got the job at the Page Program, I moved to Harlem.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, fun. I used to live in Harlem too. Did we talk about this?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
No, I don't think we did.
Johanna Almstead:
I used to live on 124th between Adam Clayton Powell and Lenox.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Oh my gosh. I love that. I was on 127th and St. Nicholas right by the park.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh my gosh. Neighbors.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes, basically.
Johanna Almstead:
Neighbors. Okay. So when you were younger growing up outside of New York City, did you have a dream of what you wanted to be when you grew up? Did you have an idea of what success or what having it all would look like?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. I think what I thought my life would be is so funny because I think I knew I always wanted to live in New York. I was a New York girl or bust. I wanted to live in the city. I had this romantic idea that I was going to live between two bridges in a warehouse that had been converted into a really cool apartment filled with all of these books. I don't think I pinpointed exactly what work I would be doing, but I-
Johanna Almstead:
Just the place, just like a really chic apartment.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Just the place, just the vibe with all the people coming over and just being the spot to hang out, that I was very sure about. And I think I just always liked being on teams and being in gatherings, but I don't think that I knew what I wanted to be when I grew up. I think somebody suggested PR, so I studied it. I thought I was going to be an art teacher at one point in college. I was all over the place.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. I love it. Okay. So you decided you didn't want to do PR, you joined the Page Program, and then where did you go after that?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
And then after the Page Program, I got my first, I call big girl job at Bravo and Oxygen. So I was an assistant or a coordinator on the digital team. So my job was really to support executives. And then as I mastered that end of the job, I got lots of other projects and things around the department that I could help with.
Johanna Almstead:
And during this time, you were still hosting your supper clubs on the side?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. During this time is when I started hosting my supper clubs on the side. So I liked the event-planning end of the work that I was doing and the coordination. I was so curious about it, but there was no job really that I could see in NBCUniversal that would be an event-planning job. So that's when I got curious about other roles outside of the building and agencies and all of these things. And so I wasn't getting the job that I wanted or the interview that I wanted right away for an event-planning job. And part of starting to host these dinner parties on the side was to get some experience and figure out, am I good at this? Do I want to keep doing this? And yeah, so that's how I got into it.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. And then when did you quit your job at Bravo and Oxygen?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
We're really going through the resume here.
Johanna Almstead:
I know. We are. We're going through it. We're going through it. I like to always know because I feel like those decisions are so pivotal in your direction. And so it's always curious to me when people make the move and what makes them finally leave and all that stuff.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes. Okay. So mine was not a smooth transition. So I was working at Bravo and I started doing the dinner parties on the side. So that was February 2017. And then later that year, I got an offer to work with a chef, an incredible chef, and be his assistant. And so I was torn about did I want to leave there and just start doing my own thing or was this a really good opportunity to learn more about the restaurant industry, work very closely with the chef, and take what I was learning to put into To Be Hosted? So the answer was I should absolutely go work with this chef, Chef Charlie Palmer. So I learned a lot while I was working there. He had a couple of restaurants in New York. He also had some in Sonoma County.
And I loved that job. I probably would have stayed in it longer if I didn't find some of the people on his team absolutely dreadful. And so I was like, I cannot stay here and become miserable like they are. So that is when I made the jump. So that was probably late 2018 that I was like, okay, I need to just go focus on this thing, be around people that are really enjoying the work that they do. I had a cool gig working with Edible Magazine, helping consult on some of their events. So that was like my first little client. I had started working on this conference that was small at the time. It's very large now. It's called CultureCon. So I had some consulting there and I was like, okay, I think I got enough that I might as well just jump.
And I was also now at this point, I was 24 years old. I was still living in Harlem with three roommates and rent was like 950 bucks. I was still on my parents' health insurance. So I'm not romanticizing making the jump for anybody. I'm just telling you the facts of my situation. It wasn't a jump that was so far-fetched to make at 24.
Johanna Almstead:
Right. You didn't have as much to lose.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
No, no. I had nothing to lose. I was like, the worst thing that happens is I spend six months doing this, it doesn't work out and I go get another assistant job and really get serious about the corporate ladder, and I probably would have been okay.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. But it did work out.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
It did work out. There's no going back. Now I can't imagine going back. I mean, it would have to be the coolest job ever.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. It's wild, right? And you're like, oh wait, I'm going to work for someone again?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. So you just kept getting gigs and kept getting gigs and kept getting gigs and you had launched your own business essentially.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Essentially, yes. I was doing these ticketed dinner parties and then brands would reach out and they would want to sponsor the dinner parties and have their products there or do screeners there. And then people started to reach out. When I started doing those sorts of brand partnerships, that's when people started to reach out and say, "Okay, well, can you plan this whole event for us?" And To Be Hosted, my supper club, really became my portfolio to start doing these bigger and bigger events. My first big brand event was a dinner party for Netflix, and that really took it to another level of how people were viewing my work.
Johanna Almstead:
Amazing. And how did you get that one? How did Netflix find you?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
They had actually found me at one of my other consulting gigs. They just knew that I was doing this work. They liked how I was working in that capacity. And then they heard I did these dinner parties that people were buzzing about. And so they were like, "Send us a proposal." I was like, "Oh, okay. We can do that."
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, okay. I do those things.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Sounds good.
Johanna Almstead:
I do proposals. I'm a big girl now.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Very quickly. I was like, "I don't know if this deck is good." I do look back at my early Google Slides and I'm just like, "I sent that to them?"
Johanna Almstead:
I know. And you got hired, which is crazy, right?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I got hired. Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
I had a moment like that too. I was looking at an old proposal. I was like, "This is embarrassing," but I got the job.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. But I guess it's a bit of a privilege to be embarrassed by your early work, because that means you kept at it to have another opinion about it.
Johanna Almstead:
I mean, I think everyone says that you're supposed to. You're supposed to be embarrassed by the first stuff you put out. You're supposed to be embarrassed. I mean, there's that book.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
That's part of the process.
Johanna Almstead:
Is it Anne Lamott? Who's the one who wrote terrible first draft or whatever that... I forget
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Oh, I think so. Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. So the idea that everything, the first round is supposed to be terrible. Okay, cool. So can you tell me a little bit about... Because clearly it was working and it was getting you work. Can you talk to me about your hosting philosophy or your entertaining philosophy, because clearly that was getting imbued into your supper club parties and then into the events that you started planning for people. Tell me a little bit about your philosophy there.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes. My philosophy has always been rooted in doing the things that you enjoy. I think of events as ways that people can really get to know someone, like the choices you make about taste and music and who you invite and who sits next to who, that all says something about the host. And so if you take a really strong stance on how you like to gather people and why you're serving the things that you serve, you get this much more interesting output.
Johanna Almstead:
I love this idea of the strong stance of just like, what is it? Putting a stake in the ground. This is how I do things. Yeah.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Mm-hmm. This is how I do things. And I didn't really waver, even though when I started the supper club, I didn't have a lot of money. I wasn't charging a lot of money for tickets. And so I always had to be very creative and very scrappy. And so my early work is very minimalistic. It's very simple. It's these little touches and handwritten details because that's what we can afford that now have become associated with how I host and how seeing people feel at these gatherings. And so I stuck with that even though the project size and the brands and the budgets have changed, I'm still always looking for those little ways to make people feel seen and feel like they were at a To Be Hosted event and not just something else that they saw online or something else that was trending. There's a clear visual and cultural center for the work that we do. And I think that's what the best hosts commit to.
Johanna Almstead:
I love that. I love that you talk in your book about setting an intention for each event. Talk to me about that a little bit.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. I think that, again, it goes back to this opportunity that when you're hosting, people are getting this opportunity to get to know you. And so if you can take that really seriously and have something that you want to say or accomplish or envision for the people that are gathering, that will make your gathering much more interesting. So getting into writing down why we're gathering people, what you want them to get out of it, who should be there, all of those have become part of our practice in planning for an event. It's really, really starting with why should people come to this party right now? There's a million things going on. Why is this the moment? What are we going to say when we have them all gathered? And what are we going to send them off with that they're going to feel really good about?
Johanna Almstead:
I also love in your book how pragmatic it is. So I love that you have this philosophy around building community and around these events, but also this very pragmatic side, which is like, this is what you need in your pantry. This is how you host people for overnight guests. I love this very... There's literally, guys, there's lists in here of what you're supposed to have in your house, which I love a list.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Lists and timelines and budgets. Yeah, because I think so much of hosting starts with how does it look and mood boards and how well do you cook and all these other superfluous skills that you could have. But if you really boil it down, it is just hospitality. And so I wrote down all the lists that we use in hospitality to make sure people feel cared for. And if you can start with that, you're already miles ahead of what people are expecting when they're hosting.
Johanna Almstead:
I get this question a lot about me because I host a lot here, and I want to ask it to you. Why do you think you're good at it? Why are you good at it, I guess? Because I can't answer this. People ask me all the time and I'm like, "I don't know. I love it so much. I'm good at it because my mom was an amazing host and I care so deeply. I think those are the things." But why are you good at it?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Well, because I don't know that I think of it as something that is about me. I think it's about how people feel when they're in your space or they're at a party that you're hosting. So if you can center that whole approach, not just on what are you going to think about me when you leave, but what are you going to think about how you spent your time and you put all your energy toward that, that just transfers very well.
Johanna Almstead:
I love that. Yeah.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. I think that's all it is. I don't feel that I do anything revolutionary or quite special. I think that I just deeply care about how people spend their time and how they relate to each other and having a space where they feel comfortable to do that.
Johanna Almstead:
I think that actually is revolutionary though, because I think there's a lot of people who don't move through the world thinking about those things.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Mm-hmm. Well, hopefully now they will.
Johanna Almstead:
Now they will. Now they will.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Everything I know.
Johanna Almstead:
Now they will. But I think it's really, because I think there's so many people, and maybe you can give some advice. There's so many people who are intimidated by hosting and who are totally freaked out by it and who are bad at it. And I think I'm like, everybody could be good at this. This is not learning how to perform brain surgery. Everyone can learn this. But what advice would you give to people who are intimidated by the idea of hosting in their own home?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I mean, I think we have to look at why they're intimidated. I think that social media has turned hosting and hosting culture into something that is very much about vanity. How well do you cook? How well do you arrange flowers? What are you wearing to the party? All of that can be daunting. So if you're spending your time looking at all of these examples that have you thinking that you have to spend hundreds of dollars on flowers and have these big grand setups in order to be the host with the most, well then of course you're going to think you can't do it and that you're not the person to host and that you're stressed about budget and what people are going to think. And I think that's just the symptom of a lot of our social engagements also becoming social engagement.
So I think that if you can divorce yourself from what you see on your phone and what is trending and really look within and look at what makes a meaningful social experience for you and just share that with people, you'll start to have a lot more fun with it and treat it like a hobby rather than treating it like something you have to live up to or perform.
Johanna Almstead:
I love that. I think I'm thinking of your past at Bravo. I feel like particularly the Real Housewives franchise, but then I'm also thinking of the Kardashian stuff, that so much of those kinds of shows were about the cast throwing lavish affairs, like turning their one-year-old birthday party into like a freaking crazy Las Vegas circus or whatever. Everything felt so over the top. And I think that there was a time where people felt like they couldn't just have a normal one-year-old birthday party.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah, exactly.
Johanna Almstead:
Just put a cake out with some chips.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Exactly. And it's like, if you can do it, then fine, you should do it that way. But we shouldn't be defining how each of us host based on how their friends host or how other people on TV host or how other influencers host. Or for me, it's even how other event planners host. When I have clients that come to me that want some of these over-the-top things, I'm just like, "I know the perfect person for you." And I slide them another event planner and that's okay.
Johanna Almstead:
Right.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
You got to decide what your lane is and really do your lane well.
Johanna Almstead:
It's funny. Someone said to me that I should be a wedding planner and I was like, "I should not be a wedding planner because I would actually only plan the kinds of weddings that I want to do."
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Exactly. Yeah. No, it's hard.
Johanna Almstead:
I would not be good at this to do this for other people because I'm only going to do what I want to do.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Mm-hmm. I started my career in weddings. I had a job at the college alumni center where a lot of Terps would come back and get married and that really scared me straight.
Johanna Almstead:
Made you realize like, nope. Not for me.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
No, can't do that.
Johanna Almstead:
I do love this idea of though thinking about staying in your lane and knowing what's right for you and what's not right for you. I do this work with brands all the time about what are you, but what aren't you? And I think that to thine own self be true, thinking about and being willing to say no to jobs. I think that's a big lesson probably for people, right?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes. It took me a long time to learn that one, but I think it's so important because if you tolerate work that doesn't feel aligned with where you want to be for too long, one, your portfolio starts to look like something you don't want it to look like. And two, you're not going to attract the work that you do want to attract because everything looks like the work that you don't want to do.
Johanna Almstead:
Good point. Totally. Okay. Do you have any moments in your life where you look back and you're like, "Oh man, if I had not made that decision, I would not be where I am today."
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. I mean, I think it's like the decision to really focus on To Be Hosted as a business. If I didn't do that, I don't think that it would grow to where it is today. I think so many people want to have multiple streams of income and have their hands in multiple things. And I think as a founder, you end up doing more things than you would like to. But ultimately, I think I built a really strong skill set. And it's not like influencers that are on Instagram making a mood board and saying they curated an event with a couple of pictures that they didn't do. It is truly like my hands are on work that has advanced companies' agendas, that has connected people who want to be connected. I have a true skill set that now I can share on multiple platforms and in books and online and in video. But ultimately, if all of that went away and nobody paid attention to me, I could still get work with this skill set. And I think that was-
Johanna Almstead:
I could still throw a good party.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I could still throw a good party for whoever's hiring. So I think that was really important is not starting with the work that people see up top, but starting with the ground level of here's how to build something, here's how to do a really good party, here's everything about the business of events that you need to learn. And I mastered that before I did anything else.
Johanna Almstead:
You seem to have a really solid inner confidence.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Thank you. That's so kind.
Johanna Almstead:
Where does that come from? You're welcome. Where does that come from?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I think maybe not having it for so long. And I think I've learned time and time again that God has my back, so I might as well shoot the big shot and see what happens. And I think my parents made sure that I knew that I was smart and that I would work hard at whatever it is that I was going to do and that would be okay. I know some millennials are disgruntled because their parents were like, "Just work hard, go to college, get a degree, you'll get a house." And that part wasn't true in this economy, but I think that they gave me just a knowing that everything would figure itself out that I carried with me. And I think that keeps me going. I don't know, but I definitely had seasons where I would worry a lot and be insecure about asking for what I'm worth, and all of that, I feel like it comes with growing up.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. I also do think it comes with, at least for me, it comes with that boots-on-the-ground experience. I mentor a lot of people and I have family members who are young women. And I always say, "No one can take hard work away from you. Once you know how to do a job, and that job could be scrubbing toilets, it could be sweeping the floor, it could be teaching children, it could be whatever it is. But once you do it and you do it well, no one can take that away from you." And I think so many of the youngins these days just don't have that because they haven't had the actual experience to work really hard and know that you can do it, that you know you can go back to those very basic skills that you developed all those years along the way. And I think that that's a huge confidence builder for a lot of people, especially women.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah, that's a good point. I think that's true. And I hope the younger generation finds that. I empathize with them. They had to come of age in a global pandemic, and then some of them... There's a girl on my team that her first job was here and I was like, "That's crazy. You didn't do any time in the office, going out afterward with your friends?"
Johanna Almstead:
I know.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I was like, "The emails that you write, I'm changing them because nobody told you you can't have five Ys."
Johanna Almstead:
You've never written them before.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
And that was mind-blowing to me.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. I do really feel for people who came up and their first job is this remote world. So much of people's first... I say this to my nieces all the time. I'm like, "Your first job out of college is supposed to suck. It's supposed to be grunt work. It's supposed to be bottom of the barrel, bottom of the corporate ladder. But the parts that are amazing are that you are immersed in the culture of wherever you're working. Through osmosis, you're getting how to be and how to negotiate and how to sit in a meeting and how to move through the world in a corporate setting and all these things, and meet people at the water cooler and then hang out with someone for drinks after work."
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
All of that stuff that is just empirical knowledge of just being physically in a place is missing. And so I think that there just is an entire skill set that these kids are not developing at all.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
No. No. And they're networking. I feel like I get so many notes about like, "Can we have coffee? Can I pick your brain? Can I do this?" And they're from complete strangers. And I was like, that is probably so hard because we were just always together. I could pop over to the desk of the person I really wanted to talk to, or there was after work drinks. There were all these things that made it much easier to network, I think. So yeah, I don't know. I feel for them.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. It's hard. I feel like I'm constantly trying to... My kids are still pretty young, but I'm constantly trying to create situations where they have to use those skills, figure it out because I don't know. I'm like, "What are they going to do? They're all going to just be helpless."
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
We hope not. We hope not.
Johanna Almstead:
We hope not. Okay. What would you say the best thing about your work is?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I mean, I think the job in general, if you're planning parties, you're usually with people when they're experiencing joy and happiness and all these milestones. So I think all of it is quite exciting. Fortunately, I don't do weddings anymore, so there's no bad nights if a groom doesn't show up or something. It's really quite simple and quite joyful, I think. So yeah, I think the best part is just being with people when they're happy and they're carefree.
Johanna Almstead:
That's fun.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
What's the worst part about your work?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I think it's constantly reminding people that we throw parties. It's never as serious or as an emergency that they think it is.
Johanna Almstead:
We're not sending a rocket to the moon. We're not curing cancer.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
No, no, no, no, no. It's really just parties.
Johanna Almstead:
Just parties. We're just having a blast.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. I was like, there's a solution for everything. Just breathe through it.
Johanna Almstead:
I think that's a good mantra though.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Mm-hmm.
Johanna Almstead:
So I feel like you've achieved a lot at a young age. You're still a spring chicken, kiddo.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Thank you so much for saying that.
Johanna Almstead:
What are you most proud of? What's an achievement that you've done that you're so proud of?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I think it's writing the book. I think Your Turn to Host. It's my debut book. We'll see how I feel about it in 10 years, but it might hold up. I think it was one of the hardest things that I've ever done, and it was learning a completely new industry along the way. Publishing is very different from party planning, even though I tried to approach the book like it was a party and that didn't really work out for me.
Johanna Almstead:
Publishing people are like, "Oh no, no, no. We're not actually just throwing parties now. You actually have to publish a book. This is different."
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
This is different. And the thing that used to throw me is parties have an end date. The day of the party comes, the party happens and then it's over. And I felt really good about all these deadlines that I had around this book, but then I realized that the deadlines just unlocked new deadlines. Okay, I turned in my manuscript. Now we have to go through the rounds of edits. And then after the rounds of edits, we've got to figure out the title and the cover. And then after that, we figure out the PR and the marketing. And I was like, so really this wasn't over on this day? This is a whole ongoing party. It's one big party.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. A very long party.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. That was hard for me to learn and adjust to. But yeah, I'm really proud of it. I think it really encapsulates what I would want people to think about in their social life and give people a skill set and really share what I've learned in a very candid and abundant way that hopefully can help some people.
Johanna Almstead:
Yes. I think it does that. I think it's great. I think it's such a good literally Hosting 101.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes. That's what I was going for.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. I really think it's beautiful. Okay. Is there anything that you once believed about yourself that you've since outgrown?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I used to think that I have a really high, I still think this might be true, but I have a really high threshold for stress. I think that I could be juggling a lot of things and have a lot of pressure, and the average person would have broke at level five and I'm on level 17 and I'm just like, "Yeah, this is fine. It's all going to work out." And I think the older I've gotten, I was like, "That's not good for your health." Actually, I'm saying no to this many projects. I'm signing off the computer at this time. I'm not breaking this time that I have to work out. I'm not skipping meals. I think that experience of being a founder in the beginning was very like a badge of honor of how much you can handle and all of these things. And now I'm just like, nope.
Johanna Almstead:
Not going to do it.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I can handle a long walk in the park. That's it.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. Speaking of long walks in the park, how do you nourish yourself? How do you take care of yourself as a founder, as a woman, as a wife who's a human in the world? How do you take care of yourself when you're doing all these things?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I feel like I've had to redefine it over the years because hosting really was my hobby that now has become my work. And so now I'm like, actually I don't want to-
Johanna Almstead:
Careful what you wish for.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Exactly. So now I'm like, oh, going to this restaurant does not feel like a night off. So I've gone into walking a lot more. I have a dog, so I'm always walking my dog, but really taking longer walks or starting to run a little bit. I've always loved television, of course, but now I've gotten really nerdy about watching older shows and seeing what things hold up and doing some writing exercises around that. I don't feel like I'm a writer by trade, so I feel like that's not really working. I feel like that's just me doodling. So I do that for fun. And then I just spend a lot of time with my friends. I'm in a book club, but I don't host the book club. I'm just a member in it. That feels like the most commitment.
Johanna Almstead:
You're like to not be hosted. I would like to be hosted, please.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I would like to be hosted, please. So I try to just spend a lot of time with my friends and my family, show up to as many things as I can, take long walks, and get really nerdy about old TV shows. Right now I'm-
Johanna Almstead:
I was going to say, I need to know what TV shows you're watching.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Well, right now, so I just finished rewatching all of Desperate Housewives because I was young when that came out, so I didn't really properly watch it. I was just sneaking as my parents watched it. So I watched all of that and now I'm into Devious Maids. That was-
Johanna Almstead:
Devious Maids? What is that?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes, because that was the spinoff of Desperate Housewives that started following around the maids. But at the time, it was a very revolutionary show because it was one of the first full Latinx cast on primetime television. And so I was really interested in just where this is going to go.
Johanna Almstead:
That's so funny too, because Desperate Housewives was the premise for The Real Housewives. That's what's so interesting. I totally miss Devious Maids.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. It didn't run as long, but it has a couple moments that are quite funny. So it's a good side watch.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. I like it. It's weird now. I'm at the age now where I don't realize that the TV shows that I love to watch are vintage. I'm like, oh.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I love Desperate Housewives.
Johanna Almstead:
Sex and the City is vintage?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Sex and the City. Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
Yes.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
The Good Wife, also vintage.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh my God, that's vintage. Yeah, I guess it is. Oh, that makes me feel really old.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. But I think it's so good.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, it's so good. Julianna Margulies.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
And I don't know that everybody else is... I feel like Sex and the City, Scandal, they're having their moment where the younger generation was like, "Wait a minute, that was a great show." They haven't gotten to The Good Wife yet, but when they do, they're going to love it.
Johanna Almstead:
Mind blown. Mind blown. Have you watched things like The West Wing?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
No. Should I add that to my list next?
Johanna Almstead:
Oh my God, yes. 100%.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Okay. Okay.
Johanna Almstead:
That's another vintage.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Another vintage.
Johanna Almstead:
Especially in our current political climate. I think it's hopeful.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Can't wait. I'm adding it to the list.
Johanna Almstead:
Add it to the list. Okay. Is there anything that you've said no to that you wish that you said yes to?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I don't think so. The only thing that came to mind actually was working on New York Fashion Week. So I said no last year, and then I said yes this year and had a great time working on a fashion show.
Johanna Almstead:
Why'd you say no last year?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Well, I just didn't think that I could do fashion shows. I was like, "I have never worked in fashion. I know nothing about what needs to be on a runway. I can't get involved in that." And so when the opportunity presented itself again and it was a fashion show that also had a dinner party, I was like, "Okay, you can win me over based on the dinner party being involved." And I ended up learning so much about that industry from the types of floors that need to be on a runway to the lighting and all of these quirks of designers. So I had a lot of fun working on it and I would do it again. So I guess that's the one scenario where I'm glad I changed my mind.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. You learned to change your no into a yes.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. So I feel very strongly about everyone continuing to do this, but especially women. What are you dreaming about these days? You've gotten to do so many things and you've already published your first book. And what are you dreaming about next?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
You mean literally dreaming about or just in my waking dreams?
Johanna Almstead:
Daydreaming about.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Daydreams. Okay. Daydreams, probably a television show. I think it would be really fun to go inside of what party planning and hosting is actually about and not just the glamorous parts of it, but-
Johanna Almstead:
Like a reality show, like a behind-the-scenes following you around?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah, I think so. I either think behind the scenes or working with people to plan their parties, almost like a flip-my-house kind of show, but for people's events. I think that would be really fun.
Johanna Almstead:
Bravo. Are you listening, Bravo?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I hope so.
Johanna Almstead:
She's an alum. Come on. Okay. I would watch that.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah, right? I feel like there's so much that you can learn about the industry and little... My husband is always amazed at the fun facts that I know about. Could walk into a room and be like, "This is the size of this room." He's like, "How do you know?" I was like, "Check and see." There's so many quirky things.
Johanna Almstead:
Wait, you can figure out the square footage of a room just by walking into it?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah, because I've just been in so many site visits now that I don't need to rip out my tape measure every single time. I can guess and only be a foot off.
Johanna Almstead:
I feel like you and probably realtors are like that too, right?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I think so. They definitely are.
Johanna Almstead:
That's so fun. Like fun facts. Okay. I like that.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Exactly. There's so many quirky things that you encounter in event planning. So I feel like there's a lot of material to work with.
Johanna Almstead:
Totally. Is there not a show like that?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
No.
Johanna Almstead:
I feel like that's such a... Bravo, come on, get it together. She's ready. She's cute. She's ready. She's cute. She's smart. She's driven. She's ready. Let's go.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
Let's get her a show.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. That's so surprising. Now that you think about all the makeover shows and all the other kinds of reality shows, this would be such a good one.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Johanna Almstead:
I like it. Okay. We are at the very exciting time of the lightning round of silly questions. Do not overthink this.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Okay.
Johanna Almstead:
What is your idea of a perfect day off? What do you do for a perfect day off?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I wake up slow. I probably make pancakes because I love breakfast. Then I go for a long walk or a jog. Then I go to the farmers market and get groceries, but I like that the farmers markets around here also make hot food too. So my lunch would be whatever smells good. And then I come back and watch a bunch of my shows. And then maybe in the evening I'll hang out with my friends.
Johanna Almstead:
That sounds lovely.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. Very simple.
Johanna Almstead:
I like it. Okay. Favorite comfort food?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Cheeseburgers.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. How do you like it cooked?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Medium.
Johanna Almstead:
What kind of cheese?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Cheddar and with the cooked onions, like the frizzled onions.
Johanna Almstead:
With the fried onions, or just the caramelized?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I can go either way. I like the caramelized, but I could go either way.
Johanna Almstead:
And are we doing condiments on here?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes. Some sort of special sauce if they've got it. Otherwise, barbecue sauce.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, barbecue sauce on a burger. Love that.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Always.
Johanna Almstead:
My eldest daughter's obsessed with special sauces. She's always making special sauce. It's very funny.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
That's a good skill to have.
Johanna Almstead:
I know. She's whipping all the things out. Okay. What was your first paid job ever? The first time you ever exchanged money for labor, labor for money?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I was a page at a library. So the people who put books back on shelves.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, that feels like a very satisfying job.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
It is, because it's very organized.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. Okay. What is something you're really good at?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Wow. I don't know. Organizing stuff. I know. I hate to give you the same answer, but I love to see a messy room and be like, "Let's get this going into place."
Johanna Almstead:
Is your house super organized?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Mostly. My husband gets in the way a lot, but if I have anything to say about it, it starts very organized.
Johanna Almstead:
Does he mess up your system? Does he mess up your system?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
He takes a while to learn my systems too. I'm just like, "Listen, this is going here now."
Johanna Almstead:
This is the place.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
What is something you're really bad at?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Probably talking on the phone.
Johanna Almstead:
Really?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. I'm not really a phone girl. Just come over.
Johanna Almstead:
Just come over. Just come over.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I'm on the phone. I'm doing a bunch of things and they're like, "Are you listening? You don't have anything to say at this point?" You're like, "I'm so sorry."
Johanna Almstead:
Right. You're distracted.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Mm-hmm.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. What's your favorite word?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Magical. I think that's what I've been saying on calls now. It's like magical. We'll do that.
Johanna Almstead:
I love that. I love the word magical.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Mm-hmm.
Johanna Almstead:
I try to use it in my kids' lives a lot because I want them to know that it's good to believe in magic.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Things are magical. Exactly. Do you have a favorite word?
Johanna Almstead:
It changes every day. It's funny because I get nervous when people flip this script on me.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Sorry.
Johanna Almstead:
So wait, let's see. What's my favorite word today?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Mm-hmm.
Johanna Almstead:
Would be serendipity, I think.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Ooh.
Johanna Almstead:
I like serendipity today.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Very luscious. That's a luscious word.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. I like the way it looks. I like the way to write it. I like the concept of serendipity. I believe in serendipity. I believe in the idea of things being interconnected and magical things happening.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I love that.
Johanna Almstead:
So that's my favorite word today.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Mm-hmm.
Johanna Almstead:
Least favorite food.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I'm not too thrilled by olives.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, I'm so sorry. That's very sad.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I know. I really want to like them. I love olive oil, but yeah, no, it just doesn't work for me.
Johanna Almstead:
I'm so sorry. That's really sad. Olives are one of my favorite foods in the world and it makes me very sad when people can't enjoy an olive.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I know. I know. I wish I was better at it.
Johanna Almstead:
What about in a martini?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah, that too. Can't do that.
Johanna Almstead:
Can't do a martini or olive?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
It's like, "Are you sure?" "Yeah, no." It's like, "Are you sure it doesn't eat sugar?" I don't know. It just doesn't work for me.
Johanna Almstead:
You're like, "By martini, you mean cosmopolitan?"
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
With no olives.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
No olives.
Johanna Almstead:
Got it. Okay. So no olives. All right. What's your least favorite word?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Ooh. Maybe impossible.
Johanna Almstead:
I like that.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Most things are possible.
Johanna Almstead:
I feel like that's a mindset. Most things are possible.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes. Just the way you get there might not be what you thought it was going to be.
Johanna Almstead:
But that's a very simple refrain. Most things are possible. I like that.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. Do you have any hobbies?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I paint when I can. I wish I was painting more. Yes, yes, because I thought I was going to be an art teacher. I loved art growing up.
Johanna Almstead:
Watercolors, oils, what kind of paint? What do you do?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Acrylic.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. Just simple, colorful.
Johanna Almstead:
Love it.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Whatever's on the heart.
Johanna Almstead:
Best piece of advice you've ever received?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
It was right when I started To Be Hosted, one of the diners told me to think about business in terms of a dog, a horse, and a dragon. And I think it was so helpful because founders have all these big grand ideas, and he was like, "You have to train your dog, and you can't learn to ride a horse until you train your dog, and you can't slay a dragon until you've learned to ride a horse." And that just works for me metaphorically. So I always take all of my ideas and they go under one of those categories, and that helped me focus on first I need to be a really great event planner. And before I can do anything else, get big clients, get partnerships, do all of the things, how I actually work needs to be excellent. And then once I had trained my dog, then I started going for all the goals that I had underneath the horse category and now I'm on the dragon.
Johanna Almstead:
Is the TV show the dragon?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
The TV show's the dragon.
Johanna Almstead:
I love that. I really love that metaphor because in my consulting business, I have a lot of young founders or early-stage founders. I shouldn't say young, not all of them are young, and they get so far ahead of themselves, right? There's so many 16 steps ahead and I'm like, "You can't..." And I love that dog, horse, dragon. I'm going to use that. I'm going to steal that one.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. Even on a day-to-day, it's like what do I need to do? What would be nice to do? And what would be really nice to do? My to-do list can't just be this one long thing where I'm trying to attack it all.
Johanna Almstead:
You can't slay dragons all day long.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
No, no.
Johanna Almstead:
I like that. And that was somebody who was attending one of your supper clubs told you that?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah, just a guy I met at dinner party.
Johanna Almstead:
I love that. I also love when that guy probably doesn't know that that affected your life for so long. That's so nice.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. I hope I run into him one day. I'll tell him, "Do you remember this thing that we talked about at this dinner party?"
Johanna Almstead:
It works.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. If your personality were a flavor, what would it be?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I think it would have to be... And it's a new flavor that I hadn't tried it until recently. It would have to be a sticky toffee pudding.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes, because it's warm, but it's got a little spice to it and it's very comforting.
Johanna Almstead:
I love it.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
You can't have it all the time.
Johanna Almstead:
Nope.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
But when you do have it's a special treat.
Johanna Almstead:
I like this. I like this. Okay. Last supper. You've graduated from this body and this earth and you're going on to the next realm, whatever that is, and you don't have to cook this meal also, and you don't have to host this party. What are you eating for dinner tonight because you're going tomorrow?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Pizza.
Johanna Almstead:
What kind of pizza?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I think it would have to be a Detroit-style, very thick crust, pepperoni, but the cups that get a little crispy on the edge, pepperoni.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Mm-hmm. With a honey drizzle.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, okay.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Mm-hmm. Because I feel like the pepperoni, it's like a spicy pepperoni and a little honey drizzle just works on a pizza with a Parmesan sprinkle.
Johanna Almstead:
Delicious. What are you drinking with this pizza?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I think a glass of Malbec.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, lovely. Balance out the pepperoni.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. I'm into it. Have you ever had a moment in your life where you've had to eat your words?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Probably.
Johanna Almstead:
Would you like to share? You seem like a very thoughtful speaker, so I wonder. Maybe you don't have that many. You don't seem like someone who flies off the handle very much.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
No, no, no. Every once in a while, I definitely do. I'm trying to think. I mean, I definitely think in being in business as young as I have, I definitely have had my moments where I'm a little more curt than I would like to be. I don't think that I've ever had any formal training about how to manage people. So I think that that has been a practice over time. I've been learning. So yeah, I definitely think so. More often than not.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Because I'm very honest.
Johanna Almstead:
So take it or leave it.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Take it or leave it.
Johanna Almstead:
You're totally not alone in that, in founders not having management experience. Managing people is a whole different thing, especially when you start your businesses when you're young.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
It's hard.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes. It's a lot.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. If you could eat only one food for the rest of your life, but all day, every day, it doesn't have to be nutritionally balanced. It's just a magical world where we can just eat what we want all day every day. What would you eat?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
A rotisserie chicken.
Johanna Almstead:
Really?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes. But from Boston Market, when Boston Market was good a decade ago.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
It was very just... It was always good. It was reliable.
Johanna Almstead:
I like that. Okay. Where is your happy place?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I don't want to be cliche and be like, "Wherever my husband is," but I do enjoy spending time with him. He's cool.
Johanna Almstead:
That's so nice. I don't think that's cliche.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. Yeah. He's cool. I feel like I picked well so far, so I tend to relax and not worry about work whenever he's around.
Johanna Almstead:
That's so nice. What did you have for dinner last night?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Ooh, so last night I thought it would be a great idea to try a... It was a terrible idea, but I thought it'd be a great idea to try making steak in my slow cooker.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, interesting concept.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Because I really was like, I have so many meetings today, but my husband and I, we take turns. We choose which days of the week who's cooking based on just the schedule. And my schedule was supposed to be not that bad yesterday, but then it turned terrible. So at around one o'clock, I was like, "We got this ButcherBox delivered. There's two steaks in here. What if I just cube these up, throw these in my slow cooker with onions, peppers, garlic, and then get some taco shells and some really good chipotle sauce, and that will be dinner." I definitely think it was redeemable, but I don't know that I need to ever make steak in my slow cooker again.
Johanna Almstead:
Did it get rubbery?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
No, it was tender. It was tender.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
But it was too watery.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, because you didn't get to sear it. You didn't trap the-
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. No, no, no. I know I should have. I was like, I really should sear this and then put it in there, but I have 10 minutes before this meeting starts, so we're just cubing it up, throwing it in there. It probably would have been better if I took a fork and shredded it, so it was more of a shredded beef situation. But no, it was not wise. It was not right.
Johanna Almstead:
It feels like a little bit, maybe like a waste of two good steaks.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I know. I know. I was disappointed in that. I was very disappointed.
Johanna Almstead:
Which is also funny because I feel like for me, steak is one of those go-tos that I don't do anything to. I just literally just like-
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
And just sear it. Yeah. I was trying to be too creative.
Johanna Almstead:
You were trying to get fancy.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I was trying to be too creative. Should have just seared those steaks, made some french fries and kept it going.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. We live and learn.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
But I love to try.
Johanna Almstead:
We live and we learn. Oh, I like this one because you have lots of moments where you have to do this. What do you wear when you feel like you need to take on the world? Like big event, meeting with a big client, hot date with your cute husband. What are you wearing?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. I love sports and I love athleisure, so I think it would be something that's sporty. It's cool sneakers. It's pants with a lot of pockets. I'm taking on the world. Usually I'm working and so I need somewhere for a microphone and pens and all these other things. So then I feel like it's cropped a little bit nicely.
Johanna Almstead:
Wait, what's cropped? The pant or the top?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Where it cuts off is like mid-waist.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
So it's like, I don't know. I'm trying to describe very specific pants that I know I went through.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
They come up to the waist, they've got tons of pockets, and they just fit very nicely.
Johanna Almstead:
Are they like a cargo pant?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
They're like a cargo pant, but not long and flared at the bottom, like cuffed.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
And then really cool sneakers and probably just like a black tank top maybe.
Johanna Almstead:
You're utilitarian-ly taking on the world.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Mm-hmm.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. I like it.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
But I like a sportier look. So even if I'm hanging out with my husband, it would probably be something like that. Maybe I would wear a heel instead of a sneaker, but it's very, I don't know, sporty.
Johanna Almstead:
Do you have a style icon person that you look to that has taste that you like?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
No, but I've committed to figuring that part out because I feel like in working that fashion show event, I was so inspired by all the designers and all of the stylists that were involved. I was like, ooh, I really want to get a stylist that can help me articulate this uniform. Because to me, it's a uniform. If I have something that's sporty and structured, but still a little feminine, then I would be good to go. But I don't know where you get those things because that's not my ministry.
Johanna Almstead:
What is the name of that guy? Andre Leon Dore. Do you know him?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. I think that his stuff leans-
Johanna Almstead:
Aimé Leon Dore.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Mm-hmm.
Johanna Almstead:
It's like A-I-M-E, something like that.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes. I think his stuff leans a little bigger, almost like full size, like oversized in a way that I would like, but not... I think it would have to be paired with...
Johanna Almstead:
Something else. I just feel like he does sporty utility, like very cool.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. Maybe I'll make a Pinterest board of my style, but I do want to get... That's part of my goals is to get a really good stylist that understands my sporty but structured utility, but feminine style guide that I'm trying to go for.
Johanna Almstead:
I love this. I'm trying to think if I know anyone who'd be really good for... I have a lot of friends who are stylists. I'm going to think about that. I'm going to put that one in mind.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes, please.
Johanna Almstead:
Because it's also the worst thing in the world when you get the wrong stylist who doesn't get you.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Mm-hmm.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. I'm going to think about this for you.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. Most memorable meal you've ever had.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Had a lot of great meals.
Johanna Almstead:
I'm sure you've had.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Memorable though, I think one of the most chaotic things I did when I was still doing events for Edible Magazine was a dinner that involved bugs.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, like live bugs?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
No, like fried bugs. It was for a group. It might have just been called Brooklyn Bugs, but it was for this group that they think the future of food is really solved through eating insects. So they had fried ants on ice cream that I remember vividly being like, "Hmm, this is actually not terrible." I can't remember some of the other insects that they had, but every course involved in insects. And people ate it, and I ate it too.
Johanna Almstead:
Did you do the crickets? I feel like there's those crickets.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I feel like one of them was little tiny crickets that tasted like chicken. And then there was something else. It was wild.
Johanna Almstead:
I would say that's memorable. I would say that's very memorable.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
It was really memorable no matter how hard I tried to put it in the back of my mind that I did that.
Johanna Almstead:
Do you have nightmares about it?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
No. I just can't imagine the body that ate that.
Johanna Almstead:
Did you eat all of them? Did you try every single one?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah, I did every course. Yes. And I remember thinking like, wow, these spicy fried ants on top of this ice cream, it works.
Johanna Almstead:
Wow.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Brave. I don't know if I could do that.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I was so brave. I was very brave in my 20s.
Johanna Almstead:
I mean, I love that for you. Okay. Go-to coping mechanism on a bad day. So shit's going sideways, your clients are upset with you, you can't make your ring light work, you're trying to do all the different things. What do you do?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I shower. I wish I had a pool, but apartment living. But I think going into water is always my reset. And so some days my husband's like, "Are you taking another shower?" I was like, "I just need a splash of water on my face and just reset." So yeah, so a dip in water is what I do.
Johanna Almstead:
I like it. Are you a bath person too or just a shower person?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I am sometimes a bath person, but I don't always have that much time, so I will settle for the shower, but a bath works too.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. I like it. Okay. Dream dinner party guest list. So again, you don't have to do all the event planning around this. You just get to go, and you're hosting your favorite people or whoever you want to come, dead or alive, famous or not, and everyone's going to say yes, even if you don't know them.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Okay.
Johanna Almstead:
Who is coming to your party?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Rihanna is number one.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. Is she bringing A$AP Rocky?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
No.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. Are we asking her to sing or are we just chilling with her? We're just hanging out with her?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
We're just chilling. I feel like she loves food and that she would have really great stories for us.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
She would tell us all the tea.
Johanna Almstead:
Yes.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Who else would I have? I would really just love to have dinner with Rihanna. I don't know.
Johanna Almstead:
You're like, "Maybe that's it. It's just a date. It's a date now."
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. It's just me and Rihanna.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. Maybe-
Johanna Almstead:
You don't have to invite anybody else.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
What would you serve? What would you have somebody serve you? You don't have to serve it tonight because it's your date with Rihanna, but what would you guys want to eat? What would you plan for her?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I would like Jamaican food. So maybe something, some oxtail, some rice and peas. I feel like she would appreciate that.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. I like this.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
I think that would be good for her.
Johanna Almstead:
I like this a lot.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Dinner party for two.
Johanna Almstead:
I like it. Keep it simple. Keep it to [inaudible 00:58:39]
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Keep it simple. Yeah. I mean, because working on television in my early days and even some of our clients now, we encounter a lot of celebrities and I am usually never mystified. So I feel like that's the only person that could make me be like, ooh, I want to hang out.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, it's true. When you work in the business of being around people like that, they lose their mystique.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. They're just like you and I.
Johanna Almstead:
You're just down for a girl dinner with Rihanna. I like it.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Exactly.
Johanna Almstead:
I'm into it. Okay. Tell me one thing you know for sure right now in this moment. You don't have to have known it yesterday, you don't need to know it tomorrow. What is one thing that you know to be true right now?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
That I know to be true right now?
Johanna Almstead:
Mm-hmm.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Oh, I don't know. That I'm loved. I don't think I know anything else to be true but that the people around me do love me.
Johanna Almstead:
I love that for you.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
And I love them back. Yeah. I got blessed with some good people. So everything else is up for debate.
Johanna Almstead:
May not be true. Got it.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Johanna Almstead:
But you are loved today. Well, I think that is a beautiful way to end. Can you please tell the nice people who are listening where they can find all the things about you? The Instagrams, TikToks, all the things, where your book is sold, websites, all the things.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
All the things. I do keep it very simple. @ambb_mayy on all platforms. Very simple. My Substack is called While Entertaining. And if you're interested in checking out my book, Your Turn to Host, it is available at your favorite bookstore. It's on Bookshop, Barnes & Noble, Amazon, wherever books are sold.
Johanna Almstead:
Shop local bookstores.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes, please do.
Johanna Almstead:
Guys, get her book. It's so wonderful. It really is like a 101 guide to, I don't want to say for dummies, but hosting for dummies. It's great. It's perfect. Hosting for people who are intimidated to host. It's great.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Johanna Almstead:
Thank you so much for spending this time with me today. I know you have to get busy.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Thank you for having me.
Johanna Almstead:
You have to go and do an event tonight, right?
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Yes. Yes. We have an event tonight.
Johanna Almstead:
So we got to let you go, but thank you so much for being here and sharing your story. And I know it's going to inspire people to sometimes maybe take a leap that they didn't even know they were ready for.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
There you go.
Johanna Almstead:
So thank you. Thank you.
Amber Mayfield Hewett:
Thank you.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, that was so fun. I love her book. It's such a great reference tool. It really does tell you step by step how to be a host. It's very cool. I hope you guys enjoyed that as much as I did. If you know somebody who you think would benefit from this episode, please send it to them. You can just copy it in your media player and then you can send it as a text. You can send it as a DM. You can post it on your own social media, which we love when you do that, which is so nice. You can email it. You can do all the things. As always, thank you so much for tuning in. If you're not doing so already, please follow us on social media. We are at Eat My Words The Podcast on Instagram and TikTok. We're so grateful that you're here, and thank you again for tuning back in with us. I will catch you on the next one.
This Eat My Words podcast was created, produced, and directed by me, Johanna Almstead. Our sound editor is Isabel Robertson, and our social media manager is Isabella Boutros.