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In this episode of The Work of Warriors, I sit down with actor Taryn Kelly for an honest conversation about navigating the highs and lows of life in the entertainment industry. Taryn opens up about her personal journey with mental health, the challenges of balancing authenticity with public expectations, and how she’s found strength and resilience both on and off the stage. Whether you're an artist, entrepreneur, or simply looking for inspiration, Taryn's story offers powerful insights into staying grounded while pursuing your passion.
Creators and Guests
Guest
Taryn Kelly
Taryn Kelly was born on October 2nd, in New Hampshire. Coming from a musical family, the entertainment industry was always her path. After attending a conservatory in Scottsdale Arizona, she was moved to Los Angeles at just 10 years old. After a thirteen year hiatus, she returned to Los Angeles and is now known for the production, INSITE, filmed with Eric Roberts.
What is The Work of Warriors?
Success shouldn't cost you your peace.
Welcome to The Work of Warriors, the mental health podcast for artists, entertainers, creatives, entrepreneurs, and high performers who want to build extraordinary lives without sacrificing themselves in the process.
Hosted by former therapist and nervous system strategist Kim Rapach, this podcast explores the intersection of mental health, nervous system regulation, creativity, leadership, and sustainable success. Through honest conversations with actors, musicians, comedians, producers, executives, entrepreneurs, and other industry leaders, you'll discover what it really takes to thrive both personally and professionally.
Together, we're changing the conversation around mental wellness in the entertainment industry by:
• Normalizing honest conversations about mental health
• Teaching practical tools for nervous system regulation and emotional resilience
• Redefining success to include well-being, healthy boundaries, and authentic leadership
Whether you're navigating burnout, anxiety, creative pressure, trauma, or simply searching for a healthier way to succeed, you'll find practical insights, inspiring stories, and meaningful conversations designed to help you build a life you don't have to recover from.
Because when artists are well, everybody wins.
Thank you for being part of this movement. Together, we're creating a healthier entertainment industry, one brave conversation at a time.
Taryn Kelly (01:47.044)
Hello? Yes, I can hear you.
Kim Rapach (01:48.971)
Hello? Hello, can you hear me?
Hi, so nice to meet you. You too. I was going to say the same thing. I feel like I already know you. I did the introduction already and I was like, this is a very special introduction, a very special recording because I feel like you kind of stepped in as a big sister for my kid.
Taryn Kelly (01:54.04)
Me too, I feel like I know you already. Yep.
Taryn Kelly (02:06.69)
Yeah, this is so exciting.
Taryn Kelly (02:11.951)
I know, I know I miss him so much. We text all the time and man, I miss him. He's awesome. Very awesome, very special kid.
Kim Rapach (02:20.57)
Well, thank you for being such a bright light in his path. And I know when my husband was out there visiting, he had a brief conversation with you just about, I think it was about the depression that sets in after, know, we'll get to that. Like, but you know, he was talking to you about what happens after a big project is over. And he's like, you make a lot of color and see if she'll be on the podcast. so thank you.
Taryn Kelly (02:40.772)
Yeah.
Taryn Kelly (02:44.546)
Yeah, yeah, we had a really good talk. Yeah. Yeah, we did. was, yeah, it's a lot. So I'm very excited to talk about it. It's a big stigma that I think a lot of people don't know about or have even experienced on their artist's journeys. So it's, you know, kind of hits you out of nowhere, but yeah, it's heavy.
Kim Rapach (03:04.57)
Yeah. Well, thank you for being here. Thank you for your willingness to be vulnerable. And these conversations absolutely fill my cup. And I just posted something on Instagram, like I'm struggling with my allergies. And I'm like, this is the one thing you don't not cancel. Because it just does my heart so good. And I really believe in my heart of hearts. This is my purpose. And I believe we can
Taryn Kelly (03:06.85)
Of course, thank you for having me.
Taryn Kelly (03:19.682)
I saw it, Yep.
Kim Rapach (03:33.934)
change the industry, really one great conversation at a time.
Taryn Kelly (03:36.546)
Yeah, I hope so. It's very important.
Kim Rapach (03:41.018)
So let's jump in. Tell me a bit about your experience in the entertainment industry.
Taryn Kelly (03:41.476)
Yeah.
Taryn Kelly (03:47.854)
boy. I have been in and out of the industry since I was seven. It's actually a funny story. I was about seven, eight years old and I was doing a fashion show for my mom in like our loft of our house. had like her heels on and like an oversized dress and I was like walking up and down and the phone rings and it was an acting and modeling school down the street from my house. And to this day,
we don't know who called them, but or if it was just a marketing call, but they were like, someone told us about your daughter and you know, we would love to have her come audition for the school and blah, blah, blah. So the rest is history. I went for years and I just kind of fell into it that way. Nobody else in my family, my, my family are musicians, but not actors. So I went for years and they did a,
a showcase, so this was in Arizona, they did a showcase where they brought Asians into the school and me and one other girl were picked to move to LA as, know, I think I was nine, 10, I was nine years old because I spent my 10th birthday here. So just me and my mom packed up, I left my school, I left my dad, I left my brother and came out here and tried it and I only lasted about,
six months. The other girl I came with ended up being, she booked a huge movie, she did a lot of stuff and I have always been a very independent person and I just with my mom and it just didn't work out. was like at 10 years old, I was like, I'm gonna put myself through college and the second I graduate, I'm gonna come here and do it on my own and that's exactly what I did. Like from 10 years old, that's the only path.
that I followed and the day I graduated, had like $500 and I drove to LA and I moved in with a friend and I've been here January 1st will be eight years in LA. So yeah, it was, I kind of just fell into it and I fell in love with it and it's been my only option ever since. So yeah, it just kind of happened. It's a weird story, but it just happened.
Kim Rapach (05:47.875)
Wow.
Kim Rapach (06:01.114)
So when you were nine, 10 years old and you knew, I need to step away and go to college when I'm older. And I'll keep this on my own. What do you think was like, where did you learn that? What was driving that? What did you want or not want to happen? Like where did that come
Taryn Kelly (06:07.002)
you
Taryn Kelly (06:19.429)
Um, yeah, I mean, both of my parents went to school. Like it was always ingrained in us to go to school. And I don't think my family or my parents really, not that they didn't want me to be in the industry, but like any parent, it's like, you know, we want you to have a good job and make money. And being a freelance artist is scary for a lot of parents that want you to, you know, do well and make money. Um.
So it was always just kind of ingrained in us and I really loved school and I was good at it. But I always knew it was the only thing that I loved. Like I was good at a lot of things, but it was the only thing that I like really had a passion for. And as I got older, I played, I was an athlete my whole life. I was competitive athlete since I was like seven. And as I got older, I was like, this can get me through college for free.
So I stuck to that path and that's exactly what I did. I got a full ride scholarship and yeah, and I, you know, I, it's funny because I know Mac wasn't really in like the high school musical era of the movies, but I always say I was like the Troy Bolton of, you know, my, or a girl because I wanted so badly to be in the theater and like doing the stage stuff, but
Kim Rapach (07:19.96)
Wow.
Taryn Kelly (07:42.326)
I was the jock, the varsity jock who like didn't want to get made fun of or, you know, didn't want, just didn't want people to make fun of me. And I, you had to choose. You couldn't really do both, you know? So I, I stuck to the sports and it got me to college and it just.
Once I got there, in about year three, my third year, I was really unhappy. And I was in the middle of the Midwest and I had made, you know, some of my best friends for life. I don't regret it for a second, but.
there did come a time where I was like, what am I doing? I was studying business and which is great. know, a business degree can get you kind of anywhere, but I knew I didn't want to get an arts degree just in case, you know? And again, you can't do these shows and all of these performances when, you know, being a college athlete is a full-time job. They are paying you to be there. And I'm kind of at the mercy of, you know,
what they want. couldn't do theater or the shows or anything. So I just did business. And in that third year, I was, I just woke up one day and I was like, I have to get out of here. Like I can't, I have to leave and I have to do something different. And I broke my contract, which, you I lost a lot of friends.
And, you know, the coaches weren't happy with me and, know, there was a lot of other factors, but I took my suitcases down and I was like, I have to, I have to go. So I, I researched, like, I researched any school in the country that I could find that I could get some type of entertainment degree and it not be an arts degree because I would have had to start.
Taryn Kelly (09:35.512)
you know, all over or I wanted it. I wanted to be able to still get a business degree, but incorporate the learnings of the entertainment industry. And I found one school in the whole country in Northern California. And I got a it was an entertainment business management degree. So was a bachelor of science. And that's exactly what I did. I drove my little O2 Toyota Camry from Kansas to.
California, the top of California. And that's where I finished my last year. I had to do like a year and a half because I transferred, but even there, you know, it was great, but I was really upset. I got to a point where I was upset that I was in college because I felt like so many people were, were ahead of me. Cause a lot of people will move to LA at, know, 18, 19 years old and start. And now that I'm older, I'm like, I wouldn't have survived that.
I wasn't ready to be here at that age, but when I was in, I remember calling my dad and being like, I don't want to be here. I don't want to finish. Like, I just want to get to LA. And he's like, it's going to fly by. It's going to fly by. Like, you'll be okay. So I got to that school. It was, you know, I went from being a full-time athlete who was getting her education paid for to going to this one school that had the degree I wanted. That was a private university that was unbelievably expensive.
And, you know, my FAFSA only one so far, I remember getting there and they were like, you owe $12,000 and I couldn't get it. And I literally walked into the dean's office and I told her my story. And I was like, I'm begging you, like, I have a year left. Like, how can I stay? And she sat there and literally wrote me a grant for $12,000. And I was like, okay, like this is, this is where I'm supposed to, like, this is what's going to happen. So.
I'm now in this entertainment. I don't know anyone for the first time ever. like, I can be anybody I want to be. You know, I've been in sports for 16 years. It's always with the team. was living with the girls. was like, I always had people around me that like, I knew instantly. And now I could be, I was alone, but I could be anyone that I wanted. And it was so like freeing and I could do whatever I wanted. could join the plays if I wanted to or go to acting school. And that's kind of what I did. I,
Kim Rapach (11:44.314)
you
Taryn Kelly (11:57.324)
I saw an ad, I needed a job on campus. So I saw an ad for, to work for the TV station and this was, it was a division one school. So like, was a prominent, it was, it was a big station. It was all the division one sports. And I went and interviewed and I got the job as the project manager and I ran the TV station. I was taking the photos and the videos and I was editing all of it on the software.
And I was running the ads and I was taking entertainment lawyer classes and entertainment music classes. And I somehow just like, started learning the business side of the industry, which changed my life and changed my perspective on everything. And I'm so happy that I did that. And yeah, I was there for a year and a half and the day I graduated, drove here.
That was kind of a long explanation.
Kim Rapach (12:49.722)
I love the second of it. And even while you were talking, I'm like, well, that explains why you were such a good housemate on the project you worked with with my son. But I digress. But no, like just to hear how you had to work for it and you you had to push against what may have been the easier path that made more sense, the more logical path. But you had that gut feeling you knew.
Taryn Kelly (13:12.558)
Mm-hmm.
Kim Rapach (13:18.106)
where you were supposed to be. And you look at it and it's like watch out everything just like click, click, click, just okay, just falls into place. Like who writes somebody a grant for 12 grants?
Taryn Kelly (13:27.31)
And my parents were like, what? I was like, I just went in there and I was, and, cause I literally was gonna have to leave the next day. Like school was starting and I was like, I can't, they're not gonna let me into class if I don't pay it today. And I literally was just like, well, this is my, like, I just walked in there and I just begged and she was like, okay. So I, yeah, I mean, I had to learn that along the way too. Like you have to ask for what you want and the...
Kim Rapach (13:53.69)
Right.
Taryn Kelly (13:54.156)
worst they can say is no, and they might say yes. So that took me a long time to figure out too, but I think moving away from home and like really, I've always been very independent, but like really having to figure it out and do it on your own changed my life. it's the only way, people can tell you so many things, but until you experience it on your own, like that's when it really clicks.
Kim Rapach (14:19.891)
Well, that's spoken like a true parent.
Taryn Kelly (14:20.918)
Yeah, I'm only a dog parent, but you know, it's, it's yeah, it's so true. It's so true.
Kim Rapach (14:25.464)
Right?
It's such a lesson in life, it's just truth. You just can't, know, so much more is caught than taught. And we can teach each other whatever we want. And until you get out there and live it and experience it, that's when the lessons really come. And even the hard lessons, right? Like even the hard lessons, you can look back on it, you know, just see how they shape you and how they help you evolve as a person.
Taryn Kelly (14:32.558)
Mm-hmm.
Yep.
Taryn Kelly (14:42.019)
Yeah.
Taryn Kelly (14:47.798)
Mm-hmm. Yep. I know. Very thankful for all of the lessons. As hard as they may have been, you know?
Kim Rapach (14:59.386)
Yeah, so you're in LA now. What are you working on? What are you doing? What are you up to?
Taryn Kelly (15:00.728)
I'm in a way.
man, mean, nothing really since the show. It's, the industry is very, very, very different lately. The past couple of years have been, you know, very scary and changing and it's a lot. It's hard to not, you know, we went through the strike, which was depressing and we were out. I was out, you know, in front of the studios with my friends and it's, it's very, very slow.
And I'm just staying busy with other things. You know, I started some e-commerce stores online and I put my focus into that and I put my focus into small projects I make with my friends and you know, just I'm going to move apartments here soon. I'm just focusing on, you have to focus on other things that you love or you'll go crazy. So.
I just got new headshots, but nothing's going on right now. The holidays are weird. We just left Thanksgiving, hiatus is coming up, and it's just, just have to be patient and see what's gonna, no one knew Heavy Hitters was gonna come out either, and I got super lucky, and I'm so thankful for that. yeah, I just, we'll see. Hopefully after the holidays, things pick up, but nothing right now, just.
recovering, coming back from being away for three months. I'm still like getting my routine, trying to build a better routine because my being away changed my mindset a lot. So trying to be better and take better care of myself and, you know, focus on my mental health as much as possible.
Kim Rapach (16:41.466)
Well, and can we just normalize the part of the industry and the part of the work where there isn't always something going on and the challenge in that. Like that's normal, but I don't think people who aren't in the industry really understand. It's like somehow there's something, something missing or lacking or, you know, you're not doing enough of something like whatever, but it's actually just part of the gig.
Taryn Kelly (16:47.705)
Yeah.
Taryn Kelly (17:05.57)
Yeah, I mean, that's, I think that's the hardest part is that people on the outside don't understand. It's like, don't worry about what people think. And, you know, that that's true to an extent, but I really saw it when the strike hit and, know, I would, I would go on the sag comment section on Instagram or like I would read the deadline comments and
millions of people would be like these these rich celebrities and these rich actors complaining like you're a millionaire what do you want strike for and it's like what it's like people in the world don't understand that like one percent of people in this industry are wealthy from acting like five percent of actors live off of just acting
You know, they have no idea that the 90 % of us are free. We struggle data. We have full-time jobs. We, you know, if you don't make a certain amount of money through sag, you lose your health insurance. Your kids lose their health insurance, your husband, you know it means? Like I had friends lose their houses during the strike. Like to see those comments and be like, that's not, that's not the majority. It's really sad. And you know, it's the same.
a lot of actors struggle around the holidays, because like you go home and your family doesn't get it either. It's like, well, what have you been in? How's it going? Why aren't you on a show yet? And it's like, you have no idea how hard it is. And I've been in that situation so many times where I get two lines on a huge CBS network show. And I remember watching it with one of my family members and they were like, the first words were like, that's it?
And they didn't, was, there was no malicious intent behind it, but it's like, you have no idea how hard it was to get, took me seven years, seven years to get my first lines on a network TV show, you know, like, so it's, can be very lonely because people don't understand, but you just, that's, that's part of the game. That's part of the game.
Kim Rapach (19:19.45)
Tell me why mental health is so important to you.
Taryn Kelly (19:23.04)
boy. Mental health, I feel like I have such a different perspective on it, especially being in LA and being in the industry, because I feel like a lot of people aren't in my position as like, you know, being a competitive athlete and then coming out here and doing this. You know, I have my core friend group is, you know, I see a lot of them struggle with mental health and they're in therapy and they're, you know, they're
They take things to help them throughout the day and I, growing up, we were always taught.
you there's no crying on the field. If, you know, you bury everything and you don't show your emotions, like that was ingrained in my brain for my entire life. So it's been really hard for me to get out of that. And it's affected my acting a lot too, because, you know, you get into these emotional scenes and it's like a lot of times I can't get there because I have such a block in my brain of like...
I'm not allowed to show that emotion because then I look weak and you know, I always have to be tough and I always have to be the strong one. And it's like, it's taken me a long time to really let that down and be like, okay, there, are a lot of things that like I need to talk about. And there are a lot of things that, you know, I need to uncover. And I almost don't know how to do that. You know, I, I'm like looking up therapy now. I went through a thing with therapy when I was like 16 and
I remember she ended up telling my mom like everything I said and it really turned me off to the whole thing, which makes me sad because that's not fair to therapy. And I know how important it is. And I've seen, especially being out here, how important it is. I'm really, I'm really trying to get into a place where I'm like, okay, this is, this is what I need to do. It's, it's, it's a conversation. It's an unbiased conversation. And, and
Taryn Kelly (21:22.21)
I'm trying to take it a lot more seriously, especially as I get older. It's very important. I'm trying to rewire my brain and all the things that have been taught to me.
Kim Rapach (21:26.01)
Thanks.
Kim Rapach (21:37.432)
Yeah, well, understanding that piece right there is so significant, right? Because, you know, I do a lot of work with trauma and trauma is stored in our bodies and it's stored in old memory and we can be triggered by something that doesn't even seem to make sense. And so, you know, for you to talk about going from an athlete to an actor, going from being conditioned and instructed and directed to not show emotion ever.
Taryn Kelly (21:39.374)
Mm-hmm.
Taryn Kelly (21:44.643)
Yeah.
Taryn Kelly (21:50.82)
Yeah.
Taryn Kelly (21:57.402)
Hmm.
Kim Rapach (22:04.194)
And then here, bring every emotion you have. It's like, where are they? Like, they're buried. And that's just a conditioning. And I think it's fascinating. And so the fact that you know rewiring your brain is, again, can we just normalize that? And everybody has something. Everybody has something that they've been conditioned. They've been traumatized. There's big T, little T traumas.
Taryn Kelly (22:06.552)
Yeah. Yeah, right.
Kim Rapach (22:32.986)
I don't want to say it doesn't matter, but everybody's carrying something in their brain and their psyche and their bodies even. And so to get curious about that, I just want to normalize that.
Taryn Kelly (22:44.92)
Yeah, absolutely. And it's funny that you said, you know, the traumas or uncovering something that you didn't even know was there. Like after this shoot, when I left New York, something like I got home and I could not stop crying. And I'm not a crier. I'm just not. just, you know, I just, my brain is very type A. I'm like, okay, I have a problem. How do I get from A to B to solve C? Like, I'm just not a cry. And I could not.
stop and it opened something in me that like I just didn't realize I needed to talk about. I think something just being out here and like working so hard for so long and never stopping and being like, am I okay? You know, like, you know, in New York, we would all sit around the table at the house and say what we were grateful for, like the best thing that happened that day. And I remember one of the last things I said was,
I'm so grateful that I spent time with you guys. You they're all younger than me. because this industry and this town has made me jaded. And I don't think that I knew that or that I acknowledged that. And watching all of them, you know, be so green and so eager and so excited and living their dream. I really took a step back and I'm like, my God, like I'm...
I'm so grateful to be here and I'm so grateful to be doing like everything that has happened to me or that I've done up until this point. Like I need to remember like looking at them and seeing that like the sparkle in their eyes or the stars in their eyes, you know, and they're so excited. I'm like, I need to get, say it again.
Kim Rapach (24:23.982)
Do you want to paint a picture for people who listening? may not know. You and I know what you're talking about. But maybe just picture of what that looked like in New York, what was happening, and whatever you can share. Just to...
Taryn Kelly (24:30.054)
yeah.
Taryn Kelly (24:34.936)
Yeah, so, yeah, so for people watching, I booked a show in New York with Kim's son, Mac. We were both leads in this baseball show. And me and all of the leads, were six of us lived in one Airbnb house together on the beach. It was the best summer of my life. It was so much fun.
And it was almost three months. It was two and half, three months. you know, we worked, worked together every day, came home together. We ate dinner together. So we're sitting around this table. So we would say, go around and say, we were grateful for that day. so yeah, just seeing, just seeing them at such a different point in their journey really made me step back and be like, I need to.
I need to not be like, let this town make me so jaded and I need to like get back to why I love it. And it's not just a job or like something you're fighting for. Like it's, you know, I'm choosing to be here. I'm choosing to do this. And, and just having that opportunity, like, yeah, it made me emotional. That last, that last table, I remember looking at all of them and just, and remembering my why, I guess, you know.
Kim Rapach (25:47.162)
Yeah, well, you have that on set often, right? When you have the wrap, you have it on set and there's tears and excitement and all these emotions and a lot of people, you know, go through so much just with a wrap, but to spend three months living, you know, with six of you and like you said, you did everything together, heard the stories, went to the gym, went to the grocery store. Yeah, so I mean, I think that...
Taryn Kelly (25:53.891)
Yeah.
Taryn Kelly (26:07.118)
Yeah. Yup.
Kim Rapach (26:13.814)
speaks so much to, it's so profound to think about that ending. And I think that's where you and my husband had a conversation of what happens when a project's over. And I just think it's profound. And again, something people don't really realize. It's an intense project. And if you're out in LA and you're hustling and you're fighting for your career and you're working and you're lonely, and then you have this experience of having three months
Taryn Kelly (26:22.276)
Mm-hmm.
Kim Rapach (26:43.714)
of all new friendships that really became family, they got it over. What happened for you in that period? I mean, I know before you even left, you were talking about it. So do you want to talk a little bit about what happens at the end?
Taryn Kelly (26:45.252)
Mm-hmm.
Taryn Kelly (26:58.574)
Yeah, I mean, this, isn't my first experience with being with people for this long. think my other longest one was a month and I was in Finland. And I think people don't realize, or like, we might be the only industry where like, you are literally plucked out of your everyday life, your routine, and you're dropped into something else. And you have a different reality for months at a time. And
you don't have any real responsibilities for a little while. So we were put into this situation where it was like a dream. We got an unbelievable house and we had unbelievable next door neighbors. They were taking us out on their boat and we were going clamming. And I felt like we were living in a movie.
while all of this was happening and it was there were no cares in the world. know, we didn't someone was watching my dog and someone was, you know, taking care of my apartment and like I had nothing to worry about but get to do what I love every single day for three months and make these amazing relationships. And then you start for three months, you get in your own new routine with these people like.
We got to go to the grocery store. What are we cooking tonight? know, the Dodgers game is on. We're all going to watch it. So we got in this routine and it was like, we became, you know, your family. And just as fast as it started, it's over. And I remember coming home and I was completely done and your husband was on the couch. And it was just like, and I wasn't even out of the situation yet, but it's like, we're packing everything and
all of a sudden it's over. Like you wake up and people are gone and you immediately, and it's, remember being in my car for the first time when I dropped, I dropped the last boy off at the airport. And I remember like the door shutting and I was like, I haven't been alone in my car for three months. And it was really sad. Yeah. And then all of a sudden I'm like, I was like, what do I do? Like, what do I?
Taryn Kelly (29:13.966)
What am I supposed to do now? And you just, they pluck you, they drop you right back into your life. Like nothing happened and it all feels like a fever dream. And it's like these people that were family that nobody will ever understand the experience that you just went through with them. Nobody. And I don't even know how to explain that because shooting and you know, people, Mac.
seeing Mac on set, having these insane emotional scenes and us making sure he's okay and running lines with him and like watching him cry through these scenes and then you go home and we all debrief and like make sure each other's okay. Like that is, it's such an emotional, crazy experience. And then to just leave each other is like, it's so painful and you really don't know how to just, how do you just go back to your life? Like it's.
And you can't talk to anybody about it. You can't talk to your friends or your family because they don't understand. They'll never understand the experience you just went through. We were brushing our teeth together. I know how they all like their coffee. It's so unique and we'll be family for life. And it's the same way that happened with the people in Finland. Nobody will ever understand what you went through together.
Kim Rapach (30:18.426)
Yeah.
Taryn Kelly (30:28.746)
And the experience is just, it's one of a kind. And I wouldn't change it for anything, but it is, it's painful.
Kim Rapach (30:40.903)
you so beautifully described what happens in grief
Taryn Kelly (30:43.918)
Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah, and you know, I'm older and I've been through it, but like, I think watching Mac was really hard. I mean, it was hard for all of us, but it was really hard for me because I really did feel like his big sister and we spent every single night together and you know, he was crushed. Like watching him on set, he was crying harder than anybody. And you know, we've had so many conversations about like, he's like, you guys are my first real friend group.
Kim Rapach (30:47.322)
It's an ending.
Taryn Kelly (31:16.568)
You know, like I don't want to leave. Like, what can we plan next? Like I can't, I don't want to, you know, and like that was really hard because like to me it's a job. It's more than that, but it was a job that I booked and I have to come home and go back to my other jobs. And, know, like I'm in a different place than him, but he left home for the first time. And, you know, this is probably the first time he didn't have his mom or someone on set with him, you know, as his parent. And it's like,
to see him and from day one to day 90, he was a different person. And like the way that he came out of his shit, it's just, it's just, was, it's so hard and it's, you know, it changed all of us and we still talk every single day and we're all in a group chat and it's like, you know, we're counting down the next time we get to see each other and nobody else will have that experience. And it's just, you know, it's,
Kim Rapach (31:43.866)
Thank
Taryn Kelly (32:09.57)
It's hard, but it's beautiful. It's beautiful. I wouldn't change it for anything. Yep.
Kim Rapach (32:14.618)
It's sacred.
Kim Rapach (32:19.478)
So I'm trying to think. We talked a little bit about what people on the outside don't understand. What would you say to somebody, or what do you wish somebody understood about mental health as someone in the, as an industry professional? What would you, if somebody were struggling and coming off a project or just struggling with the day to day, just the grind of it.
Taryn Kelly (32:49.134)
you really have to, you have to find other things that you love outside of this job. Like there's so, I see so many people sit around and wait for the phone to ring and you can't because you'll go crazy. You have to find other things that fill your cup and make you happy because...
You'll go insane. just, it doesn't matter how talented you are. It doesn't matter how pretty you are. doesn't matter if you were famous in a small town. Like you have to find other things. Have a fitness routine or, you start a small business or go get a job at a library. Like you have to do, you know, I make short films with my friends or go write scripts with other people. if you want to stay in the acting game, you know, I have a friend who
teaches little kids musical theater. Like there, have to do other things that make you happy and keep your mind stimulated and moving because you'll go insane. And, you know, I work on the other side of the business now as, know, on the management side and it has changed my entire perspective in the best way.
And you know, I used to be the actor who sat at home and didn't understand what was going on or why the phone wasn't ringing or why, you know, we get told no 99 % of the time and it's hard like the rejection is is is hard. And if you don't understand why it's very painful, but there is no there is no reason it's not you. If you don't, if you. Once once you realize that this is a business before anything else.
It is a business. It's all about money. You know, you will be in such a different mindset. It has nothing to do with you. It's not personal. Casting is on your side. Like if you book the job, they get paid and they get to send their kids to college and pay their bills. Like so many people are like casting hates me, castings mean like they're they're on your side. They're on your team. Like if you have to shift your mind into this is a business and your mental health will be so much different. You know, I've seen people
Kim Rapach (34:48.026)
Thank
Taryn Kelly (35:01.464)
I'm sure you know what pins and avails are with Mac, where they like put you on a hold, you know, and they're like, we like you, it's between you and you know, one or two other people. And I've seen people go quit over that when they don't get it. Because they're like, they hate me, I'm not good enough. And you know, we stopped telling some people because they can't handle that, not getting that. And in my head, I love the pins and the avails because that means I won over
Casting I won over the producers and I'm between three people when 40,000 people submitted to the role that is so exciting and it means they're gonna remember me for the next time if I don't get it like you can't focus in on on the role you have to focus you have to change your mindset of I did something right and Now I'm gonna move on whether I get it or not and like once I put myself in that place I was so much happier and so much out of the
Kim Rapach (35:41.935)
Yeah.
Taryn Kelly (36:00.76)
You know, I'm ugly or like, why did they like me or, know, my hair wasn't, like it has nothing, nothing to do with that. Nothing.
Kim Rapach (36:10.138)
That was one of the best things that Max manager told us when he was really young was this is a business and everybody in the business is going to make money off of your child. There are right ways to do that and there are wrong ways to do that. We're here to help people the right way. And manager would also say, you know, he's my client for as long as he chooses to be here, but he's your child forever. And so you always advocate for him.
Taryn Kelly (36:16.632)
Mm-hmm.
Taryn Kelly (36:20.665)
Yep.
Taryn Kelly (36:24.396)
Mm-hmm. Yep. Mm-hmm.
Taryn Kelly (36:33.048)
Mm-hmm.
Kim Rapach (36:39.076)
for his wellness, for his mental health. And so that was really helpful. And even with trainings and when you go to auditions, don't drill the kid on the way home in the car. Like you walk out, it's done, you did a good job, we had fun, let's go to watch. And you let it go. And if you get check a veil, great. If not, we're not gonna sit and wonder.
Taryn Kelly (36:52.59)
Yep. Yep.
Taryn Kelly (37:01.304)
Well, yeah, you can. Yeah. Yep.
Kim Rapach (37:05.69)
Yeah, he had a couple of close ones too, where they were pretty big projects and it was down to two. Those are still just such very positive experiences that we had. Like, it was, I remember one, was, we were getting ready to go to LA for an in-person read. And then they called at the last minute. I mean, we were booking a flight when they called and just said, you know, the director went in a completely different direction. You know, and Mac is tall and thin and Caucasian. And this person was the exact opposite.
Taryn Kelly (37:11.662)
Yeah. Yeah.
Taryn Kelly (37:28.111)
Yes.
Kim Rapach (37:36.054)
And it just was such a good lesson to succeed. It's not about you. It's about the project. casting and directors and producers, they have to do what's best for the project. And sometimes they change their.
Taryn Kelly (37:46.954)
Yeah. Yep. And it doesn't mean it's not painful, you know? It's still like, it stings, because it takes so much to get to that point. That happened to me too, two years ago, before, maybe three years ago, before I booked any TV. I booked a show. It's one of the biggest shows on Amazon now. I booked a role, and I was getting my flight, signed contracts, and casting called and said, I'm so sorry, the writers rewrote the episode, and they wrote her role out.
Kim Rapach (37:53.016)
Yeah.
Taryn Kelly (38:17.026)
and it was like soul crushing. And it had nothing to do with me, nothing, but it's like, people have no idea just to get an audition today is so hard. So to get to that point and then it'd be taken away, even after you film it, you have to wait a month to see if you even made the cut, you know? Like it's...
The mental, you know, just, did SWAT a couple months ago and, and I, for a month I was like, I don't know if I'm going to make it. I don't know. You know, set was really rough. There was like 300 background. It was a, it was a crazy scene. I didn't know if they got what they needed to get. So for a month I sat in my apartment and I was like, am I going to make it on the show? Am I going to have the real, I worked so hard to get on this. Now I can't ever do the show again. So it's like.
For four weeks I had to sit there and just stir and then it came out and it was perfect. It was everything I could have imagined and it was like immediately I felt like a weight was lifted but there's so much more than just turning in an audition. Like people don't understand how long it's like, it's a lot. So just keeping yourself busy, really finding your people. Like you have to find your people because they'll keep you sane.
Kim Rapach (39:21.306)
Yeah.
Taryn Kelly (39:30.386)
and good people. Like have a very small circle of my close friends. We've all brought each other up when we move up. But I had to go through the really crappy people to get there, you know? But I wouldn't have the ones that I do now if I didn't. So I just, you know, focusing on other things that fill your cup and finding your people and you'll do okay.
Kim Rapach (39:58.104)
Yeah, I love that. So what do you do in addition to what you've talked about, but what do you do to take care of your mental health? You said that's something that you're working on, that you're actively working on. Do you have non-negotiables every day or just how do you address your mental health?
Taryn Kelly (40:07.865)
Mm-hmm.
Taryn Kelly (40:14.094)
Since I got back, I started a whole new routine. I get up at 530 every morning and I go to the gym. And there's something about the morning that I've always loved when like nobody's awake yet and it's dark outside and it's quiet, especially living in a big city. There's just something about like the rest of it not being awake yet that like really.
helps me and the gym is always, you know, I've worked out my whole life, not, not consistently enough and I haven't done it enough lately. And that really does help. You know, it helps my mental health a lot. So every day I'm like, even if I'm tired, even if I don't want to go, if I didn't get enough sleep, 5 30 every day, I'm like, it's not about motivation is about consistency. I have to do it. Cause I know when I'm done, I'm going to feel so much better and motivated to get more work done throughout the day.
And yeah, I'm just, that's, changed my whole routine when I came home. I'm trying to be on my phone less. deleted TikTok and all of the things that like keep me distracted and just things I don't need to be looking at. And just trying to better myself to feel better about.
I'm doing a lot of self care. started a new facial routine in the gym and I'm making all of my food at home. I'm just doing things to take care of myself and I'm telling other people no, which is very hard for me because I am a people-bleaser through and through, which I have changed. I have worked on heavily for the last four years, but people, my friend asked me to pick him up from the airport the other day at 10 p.m.
And I've never tell people no. And I was like, I love you to death, but I have to go to sleep because I have to be up at 530 for the gym. And that LAX drive would take me an hour. And he lives, you know, another 30 minutes away from me. I wouldn't get home until almost 1130. And then, you know, when I get up for the gym, would I be too tired? So he was like, no problem. Love you all. Take an Uber. And it's like, I can say no and people won't be mad at me. You know, so just just think. Yeah.
Kim Rapach (42:24.532)
Well, anything. You know?
Taryn Kelly (42:26.552)
Yeah, just honestly, I'm just focusing on self care right now and I'm looking for looking into a therapist and and just one day at a time. Just one day at time.
Kim Rapach (42:39.002)
I love that. Well, if you need help finding the therapist, let me know. I have modalities that I love. I love internal family systems and I can use tool for how to narrow it down so I can help you find somebody too. Yeah. So where can people find you?
Taryn Kelly (42:40.602)
Bye-bye.
Taryn Kelly (42:45.4)
Yeah, definitely.
Taryn Kelly (42:49.786)
Yeah, I would love that.
Taryn Kelly (42:55.61)
boy. mean, I'm on Instagram. I'm not like a big social media person. I'm trying to stay off of that too, but you know, I post, I post stories. Taryn Kelly seven on Instagram. that's it. I don't have Twitter. I don't have tick tock. don't, you know, trying to, trying to stay off of my phone as much as I can, but yeah, just Instagram.
Kim Rapach (43:03.962)
It's good for you.
Kim Rapach (43:19.82)
I think that's again, can we normalize that?
Taryn Kelly (43:22.092)
Yeah, yeah. Well, and then you compare yourself to everybody else and where they are in their careers and it's mostly fake anyway. post, nothing is actually happening that people post most of the time. Everybody's going through their own stuff. Everybody's working through something and it's like, you think that their life is perfect, but it's not. And you just have to focus on what you're doing and one foot in front of the other.
Kim Rapach (43:49.946)
Yeah, I love that. you know, being in the industry that you're in, you know, it's, so hard to escape the need for external validation. And what I hear you doing is you're seeking the internal validation, you're reminding yourself that you're taking care of yourself, you go to the gym, you're care of yourself, of yourself, you're going the gym, you're of yourself, yourself, yourself, you're taking you're taking yourself, taking of yourself,
Taryn Kelly (43:56.665)
Yeah.
Taryn Kelly (44:04.908)
Exactly.
Taryn Kelly (44:14.18)
Yeah.
Kim Rapach (44:16.41)
you know, that spills over into, I want to do this project? Does it align with my values? Does it align with my values? And so it's all relevant in that social media piece seeking external validation from something that's really not even real. We're seeking validation from other people who are seeking validation.
Taryn Kelly (44:19.938)
Mm-hmm. Yep.
Taryn Kelly (44:32.473)
Right.
Taryn Kelly (44:36.758)
Right, right. They're posting something exciting because they're seeking your validation. Exactly. Yeah. And it's never what it seems.
Kim Rapach (44:43.77)
Staff social media if you need to. Wish people out there who get it forgive you. Routing for you regardless of how much you show up online. I have a meeting for you, Taryn. I'm so glad that we got to finally meet. Very special conversation. I appreciate you just showing up. Showing up for the work of warriors. And for my kids.
Taryn Kelly (44:49.496)
Yep.
Yep.
Exactly, exactly.
Taryn Kelly (45:00.568)
Me too!
Thank you so much for having me.
Yep. Absolutely. I love him. He's the best. He raised a good one. Say it again. I know, I know. I'm hoping maybe a Chicago show will come through one of these days.
Kim Rapach (45:14.522)
Thank you. I look forward to meeting you in person.
Kim Rapach (45:25.45)
You'll always have a chance to stay. All right, take care. Thank you.
Taryn Kelly (45:26.178)
Yep. appreciate that. All right. Thank you so much. Have a good one. Bye.