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Episode 538: In this episode, we dive into the dramatic and tumultuous story of Absalom's rebellion against his father, King David. We discuss the escalating conflict between David and Absalom. Absalom, who has been maneuvering for power for several years, has launched a coup against his father, forcing David to flee into the wilderness with his loyal followers. We reflect on David's emotional turmoil as he prays for guidance, feeling surrounded by enemies, and the weight of the impending battle.
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You're listening to the Bible guys, a podcast where a couple of friends talk about the Bible in fun in practical ways. You're going to do that? Well, that didn't go very well. Good morning, Yeah, good morning. I thought it was going to be better. I thought you were able to hear me more. But no, you know, the problem was these microphones. Are so small and it was too much. Yeah, there's too much. Yeah, yeah, I should have lifted up. I could probably do it better. Can you gargle and like sort of talk and sync? I don't know, I'm not going to do it. Hey, there you go. It's not better. Okay, at least you can sort of hear it, all. Right, all right, that was awful for those who are definitely listening. There's anybody else still listening right? Correct? Today is a big day. It is a big day because Absolute is going to have a big conflict. That's exactly right. You'll give it away and we're not going to give it away a big secrets. So before we get into that, we have watch segment real quick that is called one Must Go. We should come up with that one must Go something like that. Yeah, it should it should be like what was the big fighting. Game, finish him. To combat. Yeah, that's what we need. We need a Mortal Kombat kind of a voice. Or we could do one must go, We do that. That's up that all right? Which one of you are keeping and which one has to go away forever? So what we're saying is this. Is for the world, for the whole world forever. Yes, for the whole It literally says go away forever for everybody. No, it doesn't say everybody. No, it's just for me. No for now. See, that's where the content ones are you keeping? And which one has to go away forever? Okay, well this changes the rules. So is it for us or is it for the world? I think it's for everybody. We're in charge of the world, whatever we make. Okay, the whole world off? All right? Number one, Oh my goodness, the smell of fresh cookies goes away forever or the relaxing sound of rain. I bet I know which one you choose. I I would have to, as much as I hate to say this, the smell of cookies has to go away. Really, I would have thought that you would keep. No, because rain is universal. Not everybody gets cookies around the world, but everybody. Has the relaxing sound of rain, right, I mean, think about it. So your choice for the world, that's what I say. Once again. No, I mean, but it's your compassion on everybody. Yes, your love. Yes, people don't it's not what you want to keep. Don't you know by now, Jeff, That's all I think about is others. Others. Oh yeah, that's it. Okay, Okay. I was going to say, I'll keep the fresh smell of cookies and get rid of. Relaxing rain just because you like that smell. Smell is very powerful scent. So sound sense a sense okay. Although I will say one of my favorite sounds in the world is the sound of rain on a tent. I love it. Okay, not a tent for me, but maybe on a roof. Well, there's something about being in your sleeping bag on your cot and it's raining outside but you're dry inside, and alls you have is like a half a millimeter between you and that rain. It's great. H Or in your nice cozy bed and you hear the rain on your rooftop. The rooftop. Yeah, that's okay if you're on the second floor. All right, here we go. Number two. What goes away forever? Social media or reality TV? Both? Please? Yeah, no doubt? Yeah, I picked one though, go which one? Yep? Which one? Do I hate more? Reality Tv? I hate worse than. Yeah, I agree with that. I agree with that. There's almost nothing redemptive in reality TV. Yeah, but there is something redemptive on social media. A little bit, a little bit on occasion. Yep. Okay, number three? What goes away forever? Jeff? Board games or video games? Man, this is this is this is it and home. But she's just she's mean today. Yeah, that's right. She woke up on the wrong side of the event and decided Desi rae decided she's just going to ruin our lives. Board games or video games? Yeah, I think board games have to go your video game? No, But again I'm thinking for the world. For the world, yeah, becacause everybody has video games. Nobody has the. Future of gaming gaming or video games. Yes, right, So so the future of gaming is not board games. Well that's a huge sacrifice, people, because Chris and his family have game night. Yeah that's right. Yeah, so that's a big one. So again, once again, I'm thinking about the chef. So do we we love board games too, but yeah, board games are great. We like party games more than board games, I think a little bit more. Yeah, okay, all right, before what goes away forever? Jeff? Road trips or plane flights for domestic trips. Plane flights? Really? Yeah, I love road trips. It's because I'm on a plane all the time. That's probably why, right, Although you don't get to go as far, So I wonder is it practical or is it for enjoyment? Enjoyment road trips? Practically, I would rather fly to La than Yeah, you know, I'd like to do like Route sixty six. That'd be fun to do once once, But the other ninety five times I've had to fly to the West Coast i'd rather so once again, I'm going to road I choose road trip. I'm going to read this question as if it just goes away forever, not not like semi but total. So I'm going to say road trips have to go away because because come on, right. So here's your problem. Now, how long does a road trip have to be before it's a road trip? How would you have gotten here? Hey, let's let's go to a dairy queen road trip? So how would you have gotten to the studio today without any road trips? Uh? Yeah, how would you get to the office. Yeah, so I would say, I would say, there's a condition on my choice, which is we would have to define what road trips are. Yeah, I think it's road trips are uh, trips on roads? No, that's not it's not a trip. Well so flight, it's not a train. Flights are flights in plane. I get news for you right to the studio. You weren't taking a road trip? I was. I didn't, I didn't, I didn't know, I didn't walk through the woods. Define the word trip. It's a traveling, it's it's the building of travel t s. Well, so same thing with flight plane flights. A plane flight is a flight on a plane, transition, it's a trip on the road. I just think you're not able to go anywhere if you get rid of road trips. All right, anyways, go ahead. I disagree people. This is this is this is pretty much Chris andized life's worry about nothing. Can I just can I just add that the whole world would be better placed if we just had star trek beam. It would everywhere. Yes, beat me up, Scottie, Yeah, okay, all right, And then finally number five, early morning meetings or late night meetings, something has to go away forever. I don't know the problem with late night meetings for me is I get so repped up it's going to take me an hour or two to go to sleep after the meeting. Yeah, because I just I get really, my brain is going a million miles an hour. I'm very excited about good meetings, but I hate early morning meetings too. Yeah, So I'm gonna definitely say, without question, late night meetings go away forever. Really, yeah, because out without question, there's not even a question. You know. Here's the reason why. Because if early morning meetings went away, that would mean late night meetings would have to be more of an option. And in my life, late night meetings are so rare that I hate them like more than life itself. And uh and I think I hate them way more than I hate early morning meetings. Okay, all right, well you know what I'm going to go with you on that one? Okay, Okay, you and I are together on that one. Yes, we are not together on road trips versus plane flights. Yes, because we define road trips the semantics and. We're not we're not together on cookies in rain. Cookies and rain. Well, you know, I just trying to think of everybody, you know. Who else was not together? Absolum and David, we're not together. It is the perfect say he nailed it. That's so great. That's terrible, it's terrible. It's where we are real radio pros. Let me tell you that. Speaking of road trips is about to go on. A really. So if you're tuning in with us, David and Absolom have been squaring off. Absolom, his son, is the heir to the throne. He has decided, after maneuvering for about eight years or so, to pull off a coup. Attempt to pull off a coup against his father. His father runs out into the fleas, out into the desert, into the wilderness with his armies and his people, and because he doesn't want to fight Absolom. And finally it looks like now, Absolom, we just read about how David's praying even though I'm surrounded by ten thousand men. So now he feels surrounded. This isn't was it? Psalm three? Surrounded by ten thousand men? And then here we are in Second Samuel, chapter eighteen, and it says this in verse one. David now mustered the men who were with him and appointed generals and captains to lead them. He sent the troops out in three groups, placing one group under Joe Abb, one under Joeb's brother Abishai, son of Zuruyah, and one under Itai, the man from Gath. The king told his troops, I'm going out with you, but as men objected strongly, you must not go, they urged him. If we have to turn and run, and even if half of us die, it'll make no difference to Absalom's troops. They will be looking only for you. You are worth ten thousand of us, and it is better that you stay here in the town and send help if we need it. If you think that's the best plan, I'll do it, the king answered. So he stood alongside the gate of the town as all the troops marched out in groups of hundreds and of thousands. Can you imagine, let's se you think of that lord of the rings and thousands. And the king gave his command to Joe Abb Abishai and ida, I, for my sake deal gently with young Absalom. And all the troops heard the king give this order to his commanders. So the battle began in the force of Ephraim, and the Israelite troops were beaten back by David's men. There was a great slaughter that day, and twenty thousand men laid down their lives. The battle raged all across the countryside, and more men died because of the force than were killed by the sword. During the battle, Absolom happened to come upon some of David's men. He tried to escape on his mule, but as he rode beneath the thick branches of a great tree, his hair got caught in the tree. His mule kept going and left him dangling in the air. One of David's men saw what had happened and told Joeab I saw Absalom dangling from a tree. What Joeb demanded? You saw him there and didn't kill him. I would have rewarded you with ten pieces of silver in a hero's belt. I would not kill the king's son for even a thousand pieces of silver. The man replied to Joeb. We all heard the king say to you and Abishei and Idi, for my sake, please spare young Absalom, and if I had betrayed the king by killing his son, and the king would certainly find out who did it. You yourself would be the first to abandon me. Enough of this nonsense, Joeab said, and then he took three daggers and plunged them into Absolom's heart as he dangled still alive in the great tree. Ten of Joeb's young armor bearers then surrounded Absolom and killed him. Then Joab blew the rams horn and his men returned from chasing the army of Israel. They threw Absolom's body into a deep pit in the forest and piled a great heap of stones over it, and all Israel fled to their homes. During his lifetime, Absolom had built a monument to himself in the King's valley, for he said, I have no son to carry on my name. He named the monument after himself, and it is known as the as Absolom's Monument to this day. Yuck. Well, there you go, three daggers into his chest. And it actually says three daggers into his heart, but as he dangled still alive in the tree. And then it says ten of Joev's young armor bearers then surrounded absoloin and killed them, which means, okay, number one, number one, think about this. It's a pretty rough way to go. Well, well, listen before that, remember, remember we talked about a few I think last week sometime that his hair weighed. Five pounds, five pounds of hair. Five pounds of hair two. Hundred shekels is what five pounds. So he's got this long flowing hair. We talked about Rapunzel or Crystal Gale or somebody where it just must have been ridiculous. I mentioned Troy Palomalo, by the way, the NFL Hall of Famers, so I think you mentioned. Well, let's face it, women have long hair, mostly correct mostly and apparently so anyway. So so think here's what I'm trying to say. To dangle from your hair, has anybody ever grabbed your hair and try to lift you up? Even when they grab you. I've been in a fight before. Where somebody's which is a terrible thing to say, but somebody's grabbed my hair and like even pulled me by my hair. Uh, even even to pull you and just direct you when you're able to take the pressure off and use your legs. But to dangle buy your hair what it means. And by the way, he dangled long enough for somebody to see him and then go tell Joebright and then for them to travel back to the tree. Through a battle. You know, he escaped across the battlefield get to the general, and the general has to get back with his arms. It's like he's daggling from the tree for like an hour, probably right, or at least at least twenty minutes. This is one of those moments where Absolm's thinking, I should have carried a pocket knife, right, just kind of yeah with the heck r Apparently apparently he did have a sword, he didn't have something. Oh yeah, I guess so well either way. So let's not overlook the fact that the forest was apparently brutal, so we can get to that in a minute. But so maybe perhaps his hair, being so large, just had tangled up in such a way to where he couldn't get it out. So my grandfather was friends with Jacques Cousteau, if you remember the Great Underwater. You're telling me that before we am, And my grandfather, when he was older, grew his hair real long, so he had really long haired, always wearing a ponytail, and then he was an explorer, scuba diver, pretty pretty well known explorer. He was one of the early developers of scuba. And so he was in a cave of coral and this is right before he got married. He got he remarried again when he was seventy, so he must have been like sixty eight or sixty nine, and he got stuck in a cave. His hair got stuck in coral and he couldn't get it out, and he had just noticed on his dive watch that it was time to go up. He's about out of air. So he's swimming through this coral cave. You gotta be really careful in coral caves. You can't touch him, but sometimes they'll slice your shoe brutal. And he was in a high pressure place, so it was really deep water. And he's going through this coral cave and he gets his hair stuck in the coral and he can't get it out. And so we would go months not see him. Because he was an adventure he'd travel all around the world do all kinds of crazy stuff, and so we just never knew who he was. And then he wouldn't ever call. He'd just show up. He'd just show up at the house. He'd stop what we were doing, hang out with Grandpa for a while. Kind of this eccentric old guy. So he shows up one day, his hair's all gone right. I'm like, what happened. He's like, oh, I got stuck in a cave and had to cut my hair off, and so he used his diving knife to cut his own hair. So every time I read this passage and I'm like, dude, he just had should have had a knife, right. If he didn had a knife, he cut his own hair. But that's why, that's why you should go prepared. Boys and girls was not a boy show. There you go, you could do this whole entire sermon. I'll just be prepared, just be prepared. And he wasn't prepared to be prepared. What he certainly wasn't a boy scout. That's what you can tell you. Well. And then and so then he hangs there, So that's brutal. And then then job sticks three knives, not one, not two, three right into his heart. But somehow he still lives. And then ten people have to surround him and then what stab him until he dies. I mean, this is brutal. It is brutal, and then they throw rocks on him. Yeah, corpse, But it's it's really amazing when finally David, you know, Absolom pushes this fight. Hey, by the way, and then Job says, that will teach you for burning my field. Yeah, that's the truth. He didn't say it here, but you know he was thinking it. You'll punk get rid of this guy Field, That's right. So these are hard men, and these are extraordinarily hard times, and so the Bible is just recounting what happened. But it's pretty phenomenal that this guy comes up against David, his own son, and David retreats. He doesn't want to fight him. David is willing to abandon his throne and leave his palace and go back out into the desert where he had lived for so long. He would rather suffer the struggle and the difficulty of living in the wilderness than the privilege and the power of sitting on the throne in order to not have to fight his own son. Yeah, but we know clearly David can rout his son at any moment. David is so far beyond Ebsolom, so Absolom is out over his skis right. He thinks he's better than he is. He thinks he's more capable than he is because he's able to with a silver tongue win over a few key advisors and leaders. He thinks he's better. He just totally underestimates his dad. And he decides he's going to go, and David decides, I'm just not going to fight him. But here David is surrounded by ten thousand men. He goes, okay, right, now's the time we're gonna we're gonna have to square off. I don't want to, and so he begs him, please be gentle with my son. He has hundreds of thousands of men. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but I mean in his prayer in Ps. Three ten thousand, but we know here it's hundreds of thousands of men, right, yeah, well it's hundreds and thousands. It says, oh, it doesn't say a hundred, It doesn't say hundreds of thousands. It says hundreds and thousands of men, is what it says. It says hundred. Well, actually it says hundreds and of thousands. Yes, okay, that's worded pretty right. So it was groups of hundreds and groups of thousands. Is what it's saying groups is they are marched out. Right. So if you're thinking, do you remember, like in Lord of the Rings or any of those movies where the armies march out and then sections and mark out in sections and blocks, right, that's what's happening, is that here's here's a here's a division of thousands, here's a you know, a section of Yes, I read. I read that wrong, and I perceived it wrong. I was a man die in this battle. But what I was wanting to highlight here is he's like, hey, listen, for my sake, deal gently with this young man Abslom and just David's compassion for his son even there, don't don't don't don't kill him. And you know, of course when Joeb finds a chance, he kills him. So yeah, and by the way, I wonder why, I mean Joe Abb didn't. Joe Ab used to work for Saul as well, Right, So Joe AB has been a general underneath Saul. He's been a general underneath uh David, and then uh yeah. But Joeb was an early follower of David. Yes, so David and Joe Ab were generals together, and then David leaves and job goes with David. Yeah, and so I just wonder why the one the other one you're thinking is Abner, Yeah, yeah, it was became Saul's top general. Yes, I guess. I just wonder why somebody's so close to David's father and to David would have disobeyed David's wishes. Is it because he knew that his master didn't have the strength to do what is absolutely necessary. If Absolom would have lived, this would have like there was no I. Think he thought he was putting a rabbit dog down. Yeah. I think that's what he's doing, because you look at Joe ab did things. Job was extraordinarily strategic and practical, very pragmatic. Joe ab found ways to manage his boss, get his boss to the right point, all that kind of stuff. He's very very savvy leader. And I think he just decided in this moment, David doesn't have it any and we need to put this rabbi dog down or this kid's going to come back over and over because he was so talented, he's going to keep coming back at us over and over and over again. Yeah, kill me, and to be honest in order for him to have pulled off what he had pulled off up to this point. Again, I talked about it last week, but super impressive. Right to build something and have patience for four years and then to execute it in such a manner is just it had to be completely impressive. It's tremendous talent wasted is what you have here. So David is is please don't kill my son. Be gentle with him. And I just see here with David. Now, you you got out over David's trying to have compassion. You got out over your skis you were thinking to him. My sons as they got older, fifteen, sixteen, seventeen years old, boy, they got strong, they got really strong. But I used to tell my boys all the time, there's just there's a difference between young man strong and old man strong. Right Is that true? Oh it's true, really, And my boys talk about it now. So my oldest son's twenty nine, my youngest son's twenty seven, and they still say that there's a difference. What happens, man, Because if we're gonna fight for if we're gonna wrestle for fifteen minutes, these guys are gonna beat me. If we're gonna throw three punches. I'm gonna beat them right, right. It's just it's just that way, and it's the funniest thing. And so we I used to tease them all the time, Hey, if you ever think you want to beat up your dad, you'd better bring it all at one time, because you're not going to get a second chance, right, And uh, they would always laugh, and it's it's always just we don't have an adversarial relation. We have a very good relationship as boys, but there's always that, you know, too much testosterone in the room kind of thing. We're always jawing at each other and stuff. But my boys say that all the time. There is there's a massive difference between old man's strength and young man's strength. And so here we go. David has David's forgotten more about battle than Absolom has ever even thought of. Right, And for some dumb reason, Absolom decides to go to take on his dad, and his dad retreats. He goes, I'm not gonna fight you. Finally he's completely surround. He goes, okay, here we go. Here we go, And David didn't have a problem bringing vengeance and justice against all of Abpslom's people because they'd all committed treason against David to go fight for Absolom. But he said, don't kill Absolom, just be gentle with the Absolom. And I love the father's heart there. I don't know if that was the right answer. Maybe Joey I've had the better answer there. But I love David's heart to say, you know, I love my son no matter what he's done. Hey, we can't. We can't end our time without talking about the fact that the Bible just happens to say. Oh, by the way, twenty thousand men died that day. The battle raged across the country side. And by the way, more men died because of the forest than were killed by the fort sword. Yeah, what does that mean? It was a forest of ents and all these living trees just got them and beating people. Up that it was Hey, what was it? Hang on, let me quote, Let me do the quote. He says, uh, yeah, we just don't let little worms. Are you trying to make my apples out something not to me? Yeah? Yeah, the moving trees, you try to make my apples out to be something. They're not throwing them right, I'll show you to get apples. Actually, I don't think that's it, Okay, no, no, no, it's just it's the terrain was that rugged and that difficulty. Yeah, but what a holy cow, what a moment. What an epic movie that would have made, right. Yeah, So, you know, for for somebody to be fighting in a forest to where, you know what, there's cliffs, there was dangerous ravines that were you know, just really prickly trees like whatever, there were, Holy cow, but more men. It didn't say a lot of men. It said more men died because of the forest then were killed by the sword. Yeah. So the note here for verse one says David took command, as he had in former days. In recent years, his life had been characterized by indecisiveness and moral paralysis. At this time he began to take charge and do his duty. I love that. And what happens. The army thrives, the military thrives, A decisive victory happens. Right. Great leaders, the leader of the families, the leader of the office, the leader of the church, the leader of the community, need to be decisive, not indecisive. Need to step up and do their duty. And when they do, when leaders give what leaders are supposed to give with integrity, everybody thrives, and the team wins, right, and that's what happens here. So I love it. I love everything about this part of the story, except for the fact that this kid dies. Yeah right, okay, all right, Well, hey that's our time now, so we will see you, hopefully next time on the bubb Gus