Subscribe
Share
Share
Embed
The Rabbi Aryeh Wolbe Podcast Collection is the one-stop shop for the Torah inspiration shared by Rabbi Aryeh Wolbe in one simple feed. The Jewish Inspiration Podcast, Parsha Review Podcast, Thinking Talmudist Podcast, Living Jewishly Podcast and Unboxing Judaism Podcast all in one convenient place. Enjoy!
You're listening to Rabbi Aryeh Wolbe of TORCH in Houston, Texas. This is the Jewish Inspiration Podcast.
Welcome back everybody. Welcome to the Mussar Masterclass, Mussar Mondays. And today we are beginning a new chapter in the study of the Orches Sadiqim, the Ways of the Righteous, in the Treasure for Life edition. We're at day number 127. HaChanifa, so we're starting a new gate, a gate, the gate of flattery.
Now most of us think, flattery, eh, I don't have anything that I need to worry about when it talks, when we talk about flattery. Let's learn what flattery is and the author will take this, take us on this magnificent journey. HaChanifus nechlekes l'tisha chalakim. There are nine aspects of flattery. What is that? Number one, harishon. Mishu maki bechaveru shuhu rasho veramai, vishu motzi shimra al haksherim, vishu gozel. Mamon mechaveru hu bozeh humach niflo.
So if you know that somebody is a wicked person, they're evil, they speak negatively about others, they steal money from others, but what do we do? We're nice to them. Hey, you're such a good neighbor, you're such a good friend, you know, we know what they're doing. Lo shuhu machnif lo mishapcho, eleh shuhu machalik lo l'shon. Not that you're flattering or praising him, but speaking to him with a smooth tongue. Machalik lo b'l'shonu. Lo poalta oven,
ba meshah siso, ba dover hazeh. You commit, meaning, what did you say? You committed no wrong in what you did. Right? You're, in a way, justifying what the person did. In this, there is several transgressions and many punishments. V'yesh kama averes v'harbe onshim. Ha'echod, what is the first? Shuhu shahayu lo lo'akhiyach al chatof, number one. Ve'lo da'i she'enim lo'akhiyach, eleh omro lo lo'akhatoso, humachzik idei mireyim. See, he says, there's a biblical commandment in the Torah to reprimand someone who does something wrong.
So, let alone that you haven't corrected them from their wayward actions or wayward deeds, you now said, you're not guilty, you know, it's okay. You know, lo'akhatoso, you didn't sin. Humachzik idei mireyim. And he's strengthening the hand of evildoers. V'yesh l'zeh ha'achanof onesh sh'lo kineh es ha'emes. And this person who flatters, incurs punishment for not having been zealous on behalf of the truth. In addition, because he is aiding and abetting falsehood.
So, it's a very interesting thing, is that when we talk about, in the Mesil HaShisharim, chapter 19. Mesil HaShisharim is way of the upright. So, in chapter 19, he brings the ways in which a person should serve Hashem. How do we serve Hashem? What's the proper way to serve Hashem? Our sages tell us, stand up for what's right. A person needs to know what is right and what is wrong. And if you know that what someone is doing is against God, you don't have to embarrass them.
The Torah does not say to embarrass them. In fact, the Torah warns us about embarrassing someone. And it's a grave sin. It's a terrible sin. So, what do you have to do? But you have to reprimand them. That's a mitzvah in the Torah. But, we mentioned this as a side note. We mentioned, the Talmud says, that just like there's a mitzvah to reprimand someone who will listen, there's a mitzvah not to reprimand, a mitzvah not to reprimand someone who will not listen.
So, if you know that they're not going to listen, you have no business reprimanding them. Your mitzvah is to not say a word. But there's something about, at least, despise what they're doing. Don't encourage it. Meaning, if you know somebody, someone who's guilty of a crime, they were guilty, whether they pleaded guilty or not is irrelevant. Whether they were guilty, they did something wrong. Most people who are guilty plead not guilty anyway, right? I don't know why. Well, go look at Maduro, right?
So, he just pleaded not guilty, right? I guess he's not guilty. So, he said so. So, a person is responsible to stand up for the truth. One of the things that Ramchal brings in the ways of the upright, way of the upright, in the Mitzvot Hasharim, is he says, is that God's disgrace should feel like your disgrace. Meaning, if someone does something that is harmful to Hashem, it should feel like someone did something harmful to you. Something harmful to you.
Meaning, you should feel like it's not, oh, that's God's problem, let him handle it. You should feel like it was you. If you really cared, you would do something about it. If someone goes and harms our child, what would we do? We'd stand up for them. If someone harms our parent, we'd stand up for them. Someone harms God, and no, it's not my business. It's not my business. Well, again, a person has to know. A person has to know.
What might, yes, be your business, is at least for yourself, for your family, you should say, this is not the way to act. You're not going to go change that person, but you can reaffirm it for yourself, at least. So, now he continues. He says, There's another punishment. He says, you're assisting him in his sin by telling him, no, you didn't sin, you're okay. Because now this person is not going to do his own teshuvah. He's not going to do his own repentance.
And he's going to continue, because what do you mean? People told me that I did the right thing. People told me I did the right thing. He says, Because this person was flattering him and kissing up to him, so now he's not going to even think about apologizing for his mistake. Imagine a person who's in a relationship, and the relationship doesn't end off well. He sits with his friend. His friend wants to curry favor with him.
So, his friend says to him, you did nothing wrong. It's all her. It's not you. She's crazy. She's this. She's that. So, now what does he think? He thinks, yeah, I don't even need to apologize. I don't need to ask for forgiveness. I don't need to change my ways. Because look at the encouragement I just got from the flatterer. And this could be a devastating thing. Because such a person, instead of thinking, maybe I did something wrong. Maybe I need to improve.
Maybe I need to ask for forgiveness. Maybe I need to apologize. It's not going to think like that anymore. Because everyone's telling him, or at least his friend, is telling him, ah, you're good. You're good. You're fine. He who justifies the wicked and condemns the righteous, both of them are the abomination of Hashem. Definitely, if this crime or this sin that was done is public. Then you're desecrating God's name. You're saying, no, no, you're good. You're crystal clear. You're clean. Squeaky clean.
And now you're even more, you are demeaning law and judgment. Let me just explain what this is. Imagine Bernie Madoff. Bernie Madoff, everybody knows, it's public what he did. So let's say they call you onto the television set at CNN and they say, oh, we want to get your opinion about Bernie Madoff. You say, well, didn't do anything wrong. Didn't do anything wrong. I don't know. I don't know what legal standing we have for this. I mean, this is a person that's just been persecuted.
And why are you doing this? Because you can get a benefit. You're an old friend of his. You just want to be nice. In such a case, what are you doing? That's such a thing. It's a desecration of God's name. And our sages teach us that one must expose himself to danger rather than fall into such a sin, which would be a desecration of God's name. And when he got to the verse in the Torah that reads,
you may not put a foreigner over you who is not your brother. His eyes streamed tears since he was a descendant of slaves. To which those who were with him said, do not fear Agrippas. You are our brother. That's what they said. Because he suddenly felt like he was an outsider. He started crying. Immediately, those Jews that said that brought destruction upon themselves. Because they flattered. They flattered him. And this is something that we need to be very, very careful about.
Flattery is a very dangerous weapon. Because we'll see, I'll share this with you in a few minutes. Hopefully, there's a Talmud that is brought that talks about how Hashem despises flatterers. Because what is a flatterer? A flatterer is what we, in Hebrew, the translation of a flatterer is one in their mouth and another in their heart. Meaning, I just want to say something nice to you because you just opened up a new foundation and you have all this money there.
And I want to curry favor with you and say, that's a really nice shirt. That's a really nice shirt. So is it true? No, it's really not true. But I'm just going to say it. I'm going to say it. So meaning, I know it's not true. But I'm going to say it. You're splitting the truth from the reality. And that is something that Hashem despises. Because Hashem is one and only one. Hashem is one. Hashem can't handle when we're being untruthful.
It's a form of lack of truth that Hashem absolutely despises. To the point where the Talmud says that anybody who's among the flatterers can't reside in the presence of God. It's only four categories of different evildoers. And the flatterer is one of them. The other is those who don't speak truth. People who speak falsehood. People who speak lashon hara. And people who are falsehood, lashon hara, flatterers. I don't remember the fourth one. I have to remember the fourth one. What's that? No, no.
It's one of these. I have to bring it. I think it's the Talmud in, I think, Dafmem in Sotah, I believe. It'll either be quoted here in this chapter. Or I'll bring it from the Talmud. I'll show it to you. And we'll study it together briefly. Kemoshen emar lo soguru b'fnei ish. As the verse states, you shall not tremble before any man. V'hu b'zoha hanifus yesh ba'onesh sheker b'hanifus. And the flattery in this area incurs the punishment of both flattery and falsehood.
So this is a grave sin. One that a person needs to be very, very, very careful with. And to be alarmed. We should be alarmed. To make sure that we're people of absolute truth. You don't have to say anything. You don't have to say anything. But don't say something which isn't truthful. And definitely don't say something that's not truthful for you to reap benefit from it. You want to curry favor, you want to get that job. Ooh, I'm going to get the job.
You know what I'm going to say to the head of school? You know what I'm going to say to the owner, to the manager? Oh, you're so nice and you're so lovely. Right? And just to curry favor because you want something in return. And that's not honest. It's not truthful. Now, if it's truthful, great, then say it. If it's not truthful, you better be careful. All right. So this concludes day number 127.
You've been listening to Rabbi Aryeh Wolbe on a podcast produced by Torch, the Torah Outreach Resource Center of Houston. Please help sponsor an episode so we can continue to produce more quality Jewish content for our listeners around the globe. Please visit torchweb.org to donate and partner with us on this incredible endeavor.