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Rav Shlomo Katz explores the teachings of Rav Shlomo Carlebach zt"l on the Parsha with the sefer Even Shlomo
Oh, let's sing, let's sing the niggun of, of today's learning, because it's from, from this parsha. It's from this parsha. You all know it.
ונשגב ונשגב ה' לבדו ה' לבדו ביום ההוא.
ונשגב ונשגב ה' לבדו ה' לבדו ביום ההוא.
ויותר יעקב לבדו ויאבק איש עמו עד עלות השחר.
עד עלות עלות השחר, ad alos hashachar.
ויותר יעקב לבדו ויאבק איש עמו עד עלות השחר.
עד עלות עלות השחר, ad alos hashachar. Lai lai lai lai lai lai lai lai lai lai lai lai lai lai. Thank you. Lai lai lai lai lai lai.
Bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam. Sasha. you know what? Yeah. Ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai oh.
Bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam. Lai lai lai lai lai lai lai ai ai ai. Lai lai lai lai lai lai lai lai oh. Bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai.
I just remembered something, chevre, that this niggun, I had the zechus of being close to Reb Shlomo's sister. He had a sister who was older and then there was the twin, the twin brothers. And she was the sweetest, she was such a Shlomo chossid. She mamash was a Shlomo chossid.
She was so crazy about her brother, brothers, but she was really a Shlomo chossid. Those of you that are certain Yeshivish American background, she, her name was Shulamas Levovitz. She was married to Reb Simcha Zissel Levovitz, who I was also very close to at a certain shlav, before they died. Reb Simcha Zissel Levovitz is the son of Reb Yerucham Levovitz, the Mashgiach from Mir, from the Mir Yeshiva.
It's not exactly the family you'd think that, right? It's like so funny because there's Chelkas Talmidei from Mir in Har HaMenuchos, kind of like when you start to go up the the shvil in in in Har HaMenuchos. And she's buried with next to her husband, and right there on the left side. But her brothers and parents are buried like literally like another minute walk up, also on the left side, on Har HaMenuchos. I just remember that he told me, her husband, Reb Simcha Zissel, told me that Reb Shlomo wrote this niggun in their home on a Motzei Shabbos in the seventies in, they were living in Boro Park then.
This niggun, ונשגב ה' לבדו ביום ההוא. Thousands and thousands are, hundreds of thousand people have sung that niggun since then. Anyway, it's a big zechus to sing that niggun. I want to jump, jump into today's learning.
Today's a piece from Reb Shlomo. All these pieces on Bereishis are, no kidding, all these pieces on Bereishis are, pashut, they're speaking to, thank you, Sasha. They're, they're speaking to a dor that feels lonely. The lonely, the lonely syndrome.
Not that anyone here feels lonely, but there's a few people out there in the world that feel a little bit lonely, right? I hope you all feel lonely, based on this shiur though. This type of lonely, this type of loneliness that we're going to be speaking about. So, Vayivaser Yaakov levado. So I just, outside for a second.
I think people sometimes try to avoid loneliness at all costs, obviously because they're petrified of being with themselves. So there has to be a Torah of how to be with yourself without it being so threatening and petrifying and scaring. Because when I'm with myself, when I'm all alone, when I feel all alone, that's the moment that's most mezuman, that's most opportune for hisgalus haneshama, for my soul to be revealed to me. For my soul, for my etzem of my neshama to be revealed to me.
So, some people could feel totally alone being on stage in front of thousands of people, giving a drasha in front of hundreds of people. Some people could be not alone when there when there's no one else around. The point we're speaking about over here is, when does your neshama become revealed to you? Now what do you think that means, chevra, that your neshama becomes revealed to you? What do you think that sounds like? What does that look like? What does that, what does that mean? What do you think? When your soul becomes revealed to you, what do you think that means, Lema'aseh? Like what happens then? Reb Chaim Shlomo? I would, I would assume it is the moment when we get an idea what we're here for. We get an idea of what we're here for.
Yes. You read ahead. I'm kidding, I know you didn't but that's, that's so, that's so meduyak. That's so exact what you're saying over here.
The revelation of my neshama to me is understanding what Hashem had in mind when he created me. That's his hisgalus haneshama. Actually understanding what the Ribono Shel Olam had in mind in his, kivyachol, in his machshava of what he had in mind when he when he thought of creating me. Now, I I want to tell you, many times chevra have told me that they've come to the to the conclusion, they've come to the conclusion that Hashem had in mind when they created them to mamash have the most painful life.
Kivyachol, that's what Hashem had in mind. Right? Because that's what they experience. And even though that's what you experience, that's not hisgalus etzem haneshama. That doesn't mean that your soul is being revealed to you.
That is what you're feeling. There are plenty of people like that. They're sure, they're certain that just this is their chelek. Their chelek is, their inyan is that Hashem just has it in for them, and that's their tikkun.
That's not a Jewish concept at all. And in fact, if like if the Ba'al Shem Hakadosh came down for one thing, I maybe you could say it's to be megaleh the etzem neshama of a Yid, that when you're in touch with the revelation of your own soul, which can only happen in states of being absolutely alone, the outcome is never one that's painful. The revelation of your own soul has to do with wondrous beauty and bliss by everyone, by each person. Some people have really big shlichus.
Some people have what would seem like a very small shlichus, but if you see that as hisgalus etzem haneshama, meaning when your soul is revealed to you, you're never disappointed because it creates shleimus. It creates actually the greatest sense of serenity and calmness inside. So some people are like, no, I don't want, I don't I don't want to know. I don't want to know the hisgalus etzem haneshama.
Because what if I don't like it? There's no such thing. There's no such thing. That's like, that's kindergarten stuff. When your soul is revealed to you, and you're in tune with what Hashem had in mind when he thought of creating you, that brings about a shalvas hanefesh, calmness of the heart, and tranquility.
But it also brings about an amazing sense at the same time, what's simultaneously taking place is, is is shlichus, is responsibility. Like we always think, shalvas hanefesh comes when everything's just chill and I could relax. No, that's not a Yiddishe neshama, shalvas hanefesh. A Jewish soul's shalvas hanefesh comes with the sense of, and this is how we do it.
This is how we do it, right? This is how we do it. This is how we go, right there. You could see who how old people are or what what their backgrounds were. So based on all this, now we're going to go back into because basically what did we just say, ונסגב ה' לבדו ביום ההוא.
Bayom hahu, that's not in the parsha. It's the Midrash that teaches this together. Right? V'nisgav Hashem levado, the Ribono Shel Olam is levado. And then who else was levado? V'yivaser Yaakov levado.
levado. levado.
ויאבק איש עמו עד עלות השחר. This was Yaakov Avinu's moment of hisgalus hanefesh and what happens to Yaakov Avinu when he has this moment of his own soul being revealed to him? What does he receive? A new name.
Yisrael. Sorry, what does v'nisgav mean? V'nisgav is like a, milashon, huh? Segev. No, I think it means v'nisgav Hashem levado is like this uh, lashon of elevation, like it's a, rise up? What's that? Rise up? Yeah, yeah, but it's there's a there's a word for it, like segev kol pon, like that same, like na'aleh k'zeh.
ונשגב השם לבדו ביום ההוא, right? Where Hashem is up there levad.
Okay, let's look inside. It's not such a hard piece today but I just wanted to share that that intro.
ונשגב השם לבדו, vayivaser Yaakov levado, אברהם אבינו ושרה אמנו.
כל ענינם היה שהם התנתקו באמת מהעולם הזה.
והתחברו בלי שיעור לעולם של השם. Their whole inyan was Avrum and Sara, complete disconnect from this world and connecting without any bli shiur, like like endless connection with the world of Hashem. Now here in our parsha, kan magia Eisav. What does Eisav want to do?
שרוצה לנתק את יעקב לנצח מכל עניין של קדושה.
Eisav comes in our parsha, he sees and he's heard about Yaakov Avinu, and he knows he's been continuing מסורת בית אבא וסבא. He's been a very faithful member of the family for so long. And he, that's what he hates more than anything. He doesn't necessarily want Yaakov dead, he just wants him to be spiritually dead because he knows that for Yaakov Avinu that's worth, that's worse than physical death.
He knows that if Yaakov Avinu is spiritually dead, that's, that would be a bigger, a bigger onesh to give Yaakov than than than even than killing him. Killing him would be sparing him. Killing his neshama would be torture, right? And this is what happens in this epic meeting over here in the beginning of Vayishlach, right? Etzleinu. Reb Shlomo says, by us, כשאנחנו נשארים בודדים באיזה עניין.
When we're left alone in a certain matter and we feel lonely, anachnu mityashim l'fa'amim. We sometimes go into despair.
אנחנו תלויים בעולם שסביבנו. We're so dependent on the world that's around us, u'mushpaim mimenu, and we're so influenced by it.
אבל כשיתקיים ביעקב ויוותר יעקב לבדו. When Yaakov had this, these words be mekuyam in him, that they existed within him. What ends up happening?
הוא הגיע למדרגה שהיה לו הכוח והעוצמה להיות לבד. He had all the strength in the world from this moment on, which was inherited by you and I, that we could be all alone in the world and still have all the koach in the world to keep on going.
Which is so true about Am Yisrael in the world. And it's also true individually. Everyone always says, al pi teva, according to nature, it does not make any sense in the world that Jews still exist in the world. Just as a pshat, it doesn't, ze lo, ze lo, it doesn't add up, right? It doesn't add up.
I don't know what you know, you probably know what the percentages are, right? What is it? Not good. Not good. No, like the percentage of like humanity. No it's not good or good.
Point two? Less than two percent. Two? It's two, it's two. Point oh two or something. So that's zero point zero two I think, yeah.
Zot omeret, remember they asked, remember, I don't know if you saw this. It's basically impossible. Rogan was asked recently, right? On his podcast, how many Jews do you think there are in the world? You saw that? No. 500 million, he said.
There was another episode with Gad Saad and yeah. They re-posted it, but Gad Saad corrected him, obviously, he knew. The answer that Joe Rogan gave was that it was 500 million Jews. So you're sitting there like, this is actually, no because if you look at the world and you're looking at what people are talking about, you're like at least, I mean, I know they're not like, you know, the bill the the billions, but at least it's gotta be this gezunt number, right? Where, where did it, where did it...
What's that? He was willing to learn, like he did get corrected. Who? Joe Rogan. So, azov oso, azov oso. I'm sorry I brought him up.
The whole point over here is that how did we have koach to still be 0.02% and still keep on, where did that, how could that be? It's from these words, chevra.
ויוותר יעקב לבדו וייאבק איש עמו עד עלות השחר. Now you all know in Chasidus when it says, ad alot hashachar. What is the reference of ad alot hashachar mean? Moshiach time.
To the great dawn comes. It's going to be like this till Moshiach. It's not going to be that suddenly things are just going to be great, and then we'll be many more people and won't feel lonely in the world. It's going to be like this till ad alot hashachar.
I once said a good tyre like this. Shachar is roshei teivos, when when Shabbos, when when Rosh Chodesh Teves falls out on Shabbos, which is always Chanukah, on Rosh Chodesh Teves it comes out, Shabbos, Chanukah, and and Rosh Chodesh. That's a big sgulah. I think it's like that this year actually.
When you lift up that Shabbos Chodesh, right, Rosh Chodesh and Chanukah, something amazing happens. We have the koach to still do this thing alone because of what happened that fateful night when Yaakov was fighting with Sar Shal Eisav to to still be alone. In the context is this a person struggling with themself? It's in your That's a beautiful drash. I think that's beautiful what you just said.
At least I know who it struggles. Huh? For those that know what struggles. Right, you don't know about struggles, but there are chevra that struggle. You have to talk to them.
I don't know. Yeah. Right. Yeshiva bochurim, right? Yeshiva bochurim, no, he doesn't know about struggles either.
There's there's two guys in the beis medrash, they're not struggling. You ask them. They're okay. Yallah, chevra.
Next next paragraph. This is classic Reb Shlomo this one.
עומק העומקים של היהדות הוא לא רק לעבוד את השם. The deepest depths of Yiddishkeit is not just to serve God, do mitzvos, I learn, אלא שכל אחד מאיתנו ימלא את היעוד של החלקים הכי עמוקים שבו שבנשמתו.
Rather, it's that every single person fulfills the destiny of these these pieces that are so deep in him. To fulfill the destiny of what they were meant to do in this world. I have to figure out what that is. Right? I have to figure out what that is.
Wouldn't it be a shame if I went through this world and never dedicated any koach to that and was under the assumption that if I'm a Shachris, Mincha, Maariv, Daf Yomi'd, I would be fine? Isn't that, wouldn't that be scary if that's how I spent the rest of my life? Thinking that I'm fulfilling the I may be doing holy things. No, I am doing, those are holy things, but to fulfill the ye'ud, the destiny of my neshama. That's something else.
אני צריך לחיות כאילו אני בודד בעולם.
I have to live as if I'm totally alone in this world, ושום אדם לא יוכל לבצע את מה שמוטל עלי. And that no one else can do, can fill the task that was placed upon me. This is a very deep sugya, chevra. This is a very, very deep sugya.
Because if I feel that other people could do what I'm doing better, then I'm not doing what I'm supposed to be doing, because that which I'm supposed to be doing, not only can no one do it better, no one can do it bichlal. It's not a matter of better or not better. No one can even do it. Yes.
It's like I heard you said to the Bar Mitzvah boys. You said to when I was there for when you spoke to Shlomo, my son, you said, just remember, you're the only Shlomo that you you're the only one that could do this. No one else could do what you're going to do right now. So just be the best you.
Which is a beautiful thing, but really I had a question about this. Do you think really, I mean, I don't I hate to put myself in this box that says like, I I don't think I I've ever done this, but like a person could say like, "Oh, I see why Hashem created me. This is this is what Hashem was thinking when he created me." That's it. Do I think that what? We could we could know that thought.
Have that like figure that out. Like, "Oh, this is clear to me. This is what Hashem was thinking when he created me." Yes. Okay.
Lifamim anachnu mefasfsim. Because can you imagine the answer would be no? Then then then just close that, let's go home. What do you mean? I don't think it's intellectual. No, but it's a different, it's what Ishbitzer calls binas halev.
It's the wisdom of the heart. Yeah, so if we go the way we usually absorb, you know, understand things, then no. Right. It's flow state.
It can't it can't be coming from a place of, that makes sense and therefore I look, well, this is good and therefore, that must be it. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. It comes from, it comes from vayivaser Yaakov l'vado. It comes from that.
Only from there. And and yes, a million percent. And what a shame it would be to go through this world not finding that out. You'll say, "Wait a second, there's there's so many people in the world that never found that out, and it looked like they were they're pretty much okay." So the Rebbes would say, "Yeah, maybe they did a lot of good things, but they have to come back in the next gilgul." We don't want to have to come back.
We want to do it now. Okay, there's a lot, there's a lot of hands up, I'm not taking anything right now because I want to continue right now inside. Lifamim anachnu mefasfsim. Sometimes we miss the point.
אנחנו הולכים למקום שמכונה בית כנסת. It's very interesting. We go to a place that's called a shul. Right? Shomrim Shabbos, everyone's keeping Shabbos, אבל כולם עושים אותם דברים.
And everyone's doing the same things.
אנחנו נראים כמו ערמת בייגלים זהים. We all look like a pile of identical bagels. look like, like just a pile of plain bagels.
Everyone's just a bunch of bagels, right? beigelim zehim. Ein, this is a very hard Hebrew word right now, okay? Ein individualiut.
מי הם התלמידים המצוינים בישיבס? Who are the, who are the great yeshiva bochrim?
בדרך כלל כולם נראים ואומרים אותו דבר. Often, everyone kind of looks the same.
Everyone looks like a bunch of tuna bagels בכל מקום שתלכו אליו, any place you go to.
אבל אדם גדול באמת, but a real great person, הוא כבר נראה שונה לגמרי. They look completely different. And he's going to give examples here.
לחוזה מלובלין היו מאות תלמידים אבל מי מהם ראוי לציין? The Chozeh of Lublin, he had hundreds and hundreds of students, but who are the ones that stand out?
אלה שהיתה להם דרך מיוחדת שלהם. Those that had their own unique derech, their own unique thing going on.
הרבי מרפשיץ הוא לא הרבי מזידיטשוב. The Ropshitzer is not the Ziditchover.
These are names of the great, great, great tzadikim that you could find on this, on this plaque of fame.
הרבי מזידיטשוב הוא לא היהודי הקדוש. The Ziditchover Rebbe is not the holy Yid of Pshischa.
והיהודי הקדוש הוא לא הרבי מדינוב.
They're not the same. Right? The the Yid Hakodesh is not the Bnei Yissaschar.
כל אחד מהם זכה לחשוף את עומק העומקים של נשמתו המיוחדת. You know why they're not the same thing? Because each of them had to go through a moment of feeling alone in this world.
And in that moment of aloneness, that which makes them so unique, precious and beautiful, and essential to the world was revealed to them, and they brought that to the world. Like someone once came to the Beis Yaakov I think the story is, the Ishbitzer, and they said to him, it doesn't, it's very interesting. It doesn't look like you're acting like the way your, your your abba did, your father did, the Mei Hashiloach. Doesn't seem like it's the same, like you're continuing the mesorah.
He's like, what do you mean? My father was a total, a total chiddush, and so am I. I'm following that, that mesorah of being, of being a chiddush. These are, once you taste this of of your, of your own specialness, your own thing, you can't ignore it. Because if you ignore it, you end up hating yourself.
You end up despising yourself. And then you come back with a taina on God, why did you create me like this even? I would have much rather not finding this stuff out because I can't sleep at night. Because now I have to do this. I can't ignore it.
And I try to do other things, it doesn't work.
כשולכים לרבי מבובוב, second to bottom paragraph, when you go to the Bobover Rebbe, זה שבת מסוג אחר. That's a, that's a different type of shabbos.
וכשהולכים לרבי מקלויזנבורג, זו שבת מסוג אחר.
It's a different shabbos. Modzitz, Shabbat acheret, meaning, it's all different inyanim, you know, like the chevra, I'm just saying, להבדיל ולא להבדיל. Our chevra that are in Yerushalayim, Pnima. Yonatan Atias and Ben David Toledano, they're there, right? Our dear brothers there.
Mamash brothers. They have to do their thing. Yeah, it'll, there's a taste of what they, what they got from us, but the whole inyan is, you have to do your thing. It's not about satellites and the, there's no manual for the real stuff.
There's no manual. The manual is, Vayivoser Yaakov levado. That's the manual. Right? I'm so proud of them, and you know what's happening there, it's amazing.
They just moved into a bigger place, and now they have Yehuda davening for them every shabbos I think, kimaat. It's like, it's un, it's un, and people are asking all the time, you know, I'm, did you hear about this new place, Pnima? There's something really new and fresh there. And often I'll be like, no, tell me about it. I want to, I want, I want to hear it, no, b'emet, I want to hear it like fresh from them, like just unfiltered.
What, what's the experience like for you? And to taste that, it's like, what's an amazing thing. It's an amazing thing. But anything that's going to do something real, someone, anyone that's going to do something real in this world has got have to have tasted this, this moment of feeling completely alone. Completely alone.
And then you get the revelation of what you're supposed to be doing in this world, and everything then tastes different. You're, you have this, you have this, it's all good. But everything is in accordance like he says, כפי עומק הנשמה שלהם, in accordance to the depth of your soul. That's why sometimes it's so painful.
You come to a city and they, they pride themselves in saying, we have 25 different shuls here just on this, just on this like two mile radius, right? So I've had, I've had experiences like this. I'll be somewhere for shabbos and they want to show me around all these, right? I can't remember if I, walked into this place or walked out of this place because everything is more or less the same exact thing. Just different name on the, you know, the money name is different. That's why minyan man was such a good folk song.
Won't you stay with us for Shabbos, minyan man? Cause it was needed. It was a square.
כך זה גם בלימוד תורה. This is also regarding learning Torah.
ישנן אלפי דרכים ללמוד תורה. There are thousands of ways to learn Torah. Lo derech achat. It's not just one way to learn Torah.
הגמרא אומרת שישנם שבעים דרכים. The Gemara in Shabbos says there are 70 different ways to actually learn Torah.
וכל דרך, and each of the 70 has 70 more ways. It's very similar to Rebbe Nachman's Torah about Torah learning is like where you walk through one door, right? And the Rebbe says, then there's a bunch more doors behind that door.
And then you keep on learning Torah and get deeper, and then you open another door, and there's all these other doors right in front of you as well. It doesn't mean that the other doors are wrong. It means that the one that you have to choose has to be in accordance to your shoresh neshama. In accordance to your, you know, I I'm thinking about this so profoundly right now because I had the privilege last night to be with with Weinberger for a little bit.
I was looking and I was like, today it's already a davar mekabel. It was like, it's an accepted thing that he is the way he is. And it's an inyan in the world. And it's not a it's not like, wow, what a, what a different thing this is.
It's like, yeah, this is it. It it is so, it is such a chiddush what he's done, what he keeps on doing. It is such a chiddush in this world. And to hear him speak about Rav Kook, the way he speaks about Rav Kook with the Satmar Rebbe in the same paragraph and then go to the Ishbitzer and then start quoting lyrics of modern Israeli artists, like זה דברים שלא להאמין.
But it's you don't think that's lonely? Oh my god. Bitter lonely. Bitter lonely. So now it's already 30, 40 years since this that that whole parsha began, but you know, there's now there's so many talmidim that that share that that it's a it's a lonely pain, but it's such a good, it's a good pain.
It's lonely, but it's good. But in the in the essence of it, it had to be a chiddush. Because ויסר יעקב לבדו. So it keeps on, on the bottom he says, there's 70 ways to learn, each one of the 70 has 70.
ולכל אחת משבעים הללו יש עוד שבעים דרכים עד אינסוף. Next page. But ויסר יעקב לבדו, Yaakov Avinu is left all alone.
יעקב אבינו נשאר לבד.
הוא רצה בכל מאדו לעבוד את השם בדרך המיוחדת שלו. He wanted to serve Hashem in his own unique way כאילו רק השם והוא קיימים בעולם. As if only him and Hashem exist in the world. You know what happens to you if you really feel that it's just you and the Ribono shel Olam in the world? Then there's something that you end up doing that was never done in the world because you don't have anyone to, I don't want to say imitate, I would say emulate.
Not not in a bad way, even in a nice thing, but there is no one there. So when you get to this place of ויסר יעקב לבדו, what happens to you? He's gilui ha'neshama, your soul's revealed to you. You have a you have a clear path, clearer path towards fulfilling the destiny of your deepest depths, but what emanates from it is a new way of serving Hashem that never ever existed before. You know who gets threatened by when they see a chiddush? I'm not talking about against halacha, within the world of halacha obviously.
You know who gets threatened by people that are are chadshanim? Who? The bagels. Why? Yeah, why? No, but why? It takes them out of, it drives them crazy. It drives them crazy. They don't know what to do with themselves.
The bagels start that start they they start doing mecha'os, they start doing like, you know, mecha'os and mecha'ah. They start doing a protesting. They start, no!
חדש אסור מן התורה, all these things, right? As if they understand what chadash means and assur min haTorah. You know, my first day in Yeshivat HaMivtar here in Efrat when I first moved here, it was Gimmel Elul.
The yeshiva started on Gimmel Elul that year. That's Rav Kook's yahrzeit. And one of the greatest tzadikim that I ever met, and most beautiful Jews, and a chidushdike Yid that I ever met was one of my rabbeim in the yeshiva at the time. His name was Rav Natan Siegel.
זכר צדיק וקדוש לברכה לחיי העולם הבא. He was very much makpid to actually say out that rashei teivos. That's how I got it from him. Zatzal Hei Hey, זכר צדיק וקדוש לברכה לחיי העולם הבא.
Most of you didn't, did you know him Nelson? He, Rav Natan Siegel? Yeah. Short, danced like when he danced, you were standing by the Magid of Mezritch's table. You were Reb Zusha, you were he was he was literally a living, this living chiyus of of of all the things we speak about and long for. So the first day of yeshiva, it was Gimmel Elul.
And the first thing I heard from him was, our problem with our Yiddishkeit is that we have no idea how to deal with eclectic minds. And I'm like, oh my god, this is the yeshiva that I, I thought it was like this, you know, he was the first thing I heard in the that yeshiva. It wasn't the rest was the rest of the day was pretty heavy, heavy straight learning, but for a few minutes in the morning I'm like, oh my God, is this did I actually, this is, you know, the whole thing was amazing, but that was really amazing. But that line stuck with me.
We don't know how to deal with eclectic minds. So when you don't know how to deal with an eclectic mind, because you feel threatened, what do you do? Zeh hu. Chosem. Muchlat.
Tam. Off, off. Pasul, treif, done with you. Vayivaser Yaakov l'vado.
Yesterday he's saying again Yaakov Avinu is left l'vad. You know how eclectic you become when you're alone and you taste aloneness in the holiest way? Yaakov wants to serve Hashem בדרך המיוחדת שלו, as if only him and Hashem exist in the world. Second line in the middle, וזה נכון גם לכל אחד מאיתנו. And it's true about each and every one of us.
K'muvan, לעולם לא אהיה כמו אברהם אבינו. I'll never be like Avraham Avinu. But guess what? That's good news. You know why?
כי זה לא הייעוד שלי.
Because if Hashem wanted me to be like Avraham Avinu, you know what the craziest thing is? I would have been Avraham Avinu.
אני צריך לעשות משהו אחר. I have to do something else. I have to take from Avraham Avinu and do something else.
Moshe Rabbeinu מילא את הייעוד המיוחד שלו. Moshe Rabbeinu fulfilled his special destiny. And the Baal Shem Tov, et shelo, and the Baal Shem did his thing.
כל אדם צריך למצוא איך הוא אמור להיראות כשהוא קרוב להשם.
Every person has to find out how they're what they're supposed to look like when they're close to Hashem.
איך אני נראה למעלה בשמיים? How do I look? What do I look like up there in the Shamayim? We know, it's stuff we never even think about. We're just trying to get through our Anona. But you understand that there's a whole part of our lives that have to has to be dedicated to this.
Rav Shlomo would often ask people, what do you think God thinks of you? And their answers were always based on the mitzva aveira tally. That that that's what their answer is usually based on. Such a shallow pathetic God, if that's the way Hashem that Hashem looks at us. Yeah, Elie.
So it's obviously a mode that shouldn't be so normal, to answer from the other shiur, but the question in halacha, like if a person is more halachically minded, not that I am but because I'm more into the soul, but I understand those mindsets as well because they're looking for mitzvos that יחיד שיכול לקיימה ואין אחר יכול לקיימה, meaning there's no one else who can do this mitzva. So that becomes in a way through the system of Torah they find themselves. So it's it's not like it's only like a more like flowing kind of neshama who's going to find himself. It's also these more Toiredike Halachic yidden if they're really mevakesh the emes, they'll find mitzvos like just being a father or being a being a friend or this thing this is a mitzva no one else can do.
So I'm obligated to be a husband right now, and I'm bringing down a unique light that no one else can bring in this mitzva that I'm the only person that can do it. So for those kind of people I imagine they also find their yiud, it just doesn't look as ruchni or whatever as other people might, you know, associate with. Nachon. Nachon.
It doesn't mean that when you find your yiud, now you're going to look like the biggest chadshan in the world. But even if you hold with what you're saying, it can mean that I'm going to learn Bava Basra right now in a way that was never ever learned before. I can I'm going to bring out giluyim atzumim just from that. But as long as you're not trying to be an imitator and an imposter.
As long as you're really trying to reveal from your deepest depths of your neshama what you're really all about. So it's a good point that you're making.
אנחנו מוכרחים להוציא לאור את עומק העומקים של עצמנו. We must bring to light our deepest depths of our soul, of our neshama.
אולי אני שומר שבת כמו כולם. Maybe I keep Shabbos like everyone. I daven, mitpalel, mekadesh, do kiddush, ochel gefilte fish like everybody else, ochel oif. I eat chicken like everyone else.
I eat, bench, mevarech v'holeich lishon, and go shluff.
אני יכול לנהוג כך שוב ושוב מידי שבת. I could do this on repeat every single Shabbos, אבל בלי שזה קשור אליי, לפנימיות שלי, but without any of that being connected to me, to to my insides.
רק כשאני ממלא את הייעוד שלי.
Only when I fulfill my, my destiny.
הנשמה שלי מתגלה. My soul is revealed. Now listen to this, listen to this power bomb Torah over here.
הרבי הקדוש מצנז אומר, the Tzanzer Rebbe says, shet hadavar... I, it's just so, I I hope I hope we give this over right because this is like, Reb Shlomo said this many times, but I was always b'safek if it came over clearly in the sfarim. Let's see if we could do this.
הרבי הקדוש מצנז אומר שאת הדבר שאני זקוק לו ביותר, that which I need more than anything, לא אמצא כתוב מפורש בתורה.
I'm not gonna find it written out, written out clearly in the Torah. That which I, that which I really need to know, right?
אם כל דבר היה כתוב שחור על גבי לבן, if everything was written black on white, מי היה צריך את הריבונו של עולם? Then who would need God? Do you hear? I mean, I, I've, I I've heard this line for so many years, but I want to know, does this shter or shtem? Does it stir you up or does it shtem? Or you have no idea what what what he just said right now. Okay, I'm going to say it again, all right? Chevra, wake up and be with me right now. Listen to this.
The Tzanzer Rebbe says that that which I need more than anything in this world, that which will bring me to my ye'ud, that that which will lead me to the revelation of my soul and make me feel alive and will create for me my path that I know I must be on, will not, cannot be found written mefurash in a pasuk or in a halacha. Because, he says, if everything that I needed on that level was written clearly in any text, then what wouldn't be needed? Hashem. Hashem. Ribbono Shel Olam.
Hashem wouldn't be needed. So the fact that there's a hastara k'viyachol, there's like a concealment, and it's not open to me is the greatest gift in the world because what does it make me do? Look for it. Go go to the one, to the only one, to go to Hashem. Without this, like if it was just written out somewhere, and and why is it so painful to say? Because there are there are so many beautiful Yidden that are under the assumption that it's all written out there.
Don't start doing, don't don't start hacking me. Just just, don't start trying to be a chochom. It's right there. It's right there.
Huh? But what is written is a necessary step to the... It's a, yeah, as long as you know that there's a next one. That's the, that's the trap. That's the trap.
אני לא יודע איך להשיג את הדבר שאני זקוק לו ביותר. I don't know how to reach, how to grasp that which I need more than anything.
ולכן אני מתפלל ומבקש מריבונו של עולם שיברך אותי ושיהיה לי הזכות להשיג אותו. So I'm davening and asking Ribbono Shel Olam bless me that I should have the merit to get to this, to the dreams you have for me, which aren't written down anywhere.
They only come from a place of ויוותר יעקב לבדו ויאבק איש עמו עד עלות השחר, only from there. So this is how he ends here, vayivaser Yaakov levado. That night that we're reading about in our parsha, יעקב אבינו נותן לכל יהודי את הכוח שהנשמה שלו באמת תתגלה ממעמקים. When you're reading this parsha again and you're going through it and you're reading about that faithful night where all these things happen on that night, experience it the way that we just learned it now with the emuna that Yaakov Avinu is giving the koach to every single Yid that you will get there.
What does that mean you will get there? that your neshama, which means the deepest depths of you, what you really are made out of and the dreams that Hashem has for you and what Hashem thought about when creating you, will eventually be revealed to you. It will, but you have to go through this place of feeling that there's nothing and there's nobody in the world, rak ata. Only you. You have to get to that place.
I have to get to that place. I have to. Perhaps that's why Rabeinu Hakadosh, רבי נחמן בן פייגא, zchusyo yagen aleinu. The whole inyan was, what do you think his boididus was? What do you think it was? Mental health? Of course it is, but what do you think the nekuda pnimis of it, right? So as we said many times, when you look in Lekutei Moran, Sichos Haran, the lashon the Rebbe uses there is יפרש שיחתו לפני קונו.
That his boididus is the moment where when you're talking to Hashem because there's only Hashem and there's no one else around, and it's mamish Vayivaser Yaakov Levado. So I want to, I always said this and I have to check with Rav Chaim Kramer if he's mekabel this because I think it's good, but it's, it works for me, but I want to, you know, this is an inyan I would I would want to hear from him. yefaresh sichaso means you give, you finally give a peirush to your constant sicha you have with Hashem and you start, you start understanding yourself. You start understanding what you even want to do in this world.
You start, you give a peirush to your own sicha, to your own sicha, to your own conversation and you're just doing it, it's happening between you and yourself, it just happens to be you're doing it lifnei Boro, lifnei Kono, in the presence of Hashem. So therefore, how could a person go through this world any day, the Rebbe says, without that Vayivaser Yaakov Levado experience? How could you do that? How could you go? What what's what's the day going to be like? What's life if not meeting that like that? You know, there's gonna come a time, Rav Noson said this, and he said, there'll be, it'll be, I don't know if he said hundreds of thousands of years, but he said there's gonna come a time that there's gonna be, you know, a bunch of heilige yidden and they're gonna hear about a period in Yiddishkeit where people viewed hisbodedus as optional, and they're not going to believe that such a generation existed. So when I think about that, I say, I really don't want to be part of the chevra that thought that it's possible to actually know what in the world we're doing and and and, you know, I want to be part of the people that knew that it was impossible. You think any of these Israeli politicians, leaders, or even rabbis in high places have a chance of knowing what this dor needs without having Vayivaser Yaakov Levado? They have this chit-chat around them all day long.
All day and all night. They're never alone. Ever. And has anyone, does anyone feel like we're being led to a more meduyak place here as people? As individuals, maybe.
As a people? Come on. Ma pitom. So Rav Shlomo said in that famous concert in Brooklyn College after the Yom Kippur War, he said, you know, friends, Israel has no friend in the world, the holy land, the holy people of Israel are all alone.
הן עם לבדד ישכון.
But you know what we have? One friend in heaven. And that's all we need. We have one friend in heaven. This, this, these words should give us koach to get our hiskashrus with Hashem Yisbarach with just direct, just just mamish the most, the most, it should be just a beautiful, warm, we just got to let go of all the, all the, the traumas from childhood, meaning in terms of not, not chalila abuse or something, saying like educational stuff and the the small katnus of Hashem versions that they gave us, enough already.
Mochel your teachers, they did the best they thought they could. We're in Eretz Yisrael now. It's Erev Mashiach. We have Torahs that are available in our fingertips that are like, Yalla.
Now, now, now much, much more to the, to the, to the beat of our own drums and everyone's gonna be a chiddush. Everyone's, when you do this, everyone's gonna be a chiddush. Everyone's gonna be something completely new that never existed before and it'll be clear that the world couldn't have existed, couldn't continue to exist unless your chiddush was in this world. And if you could give that over to someone, you gave them for sure olam hazeh because now, they have actually what to do in this world and definitely, you give them Olam HaBa as well.
We should be zocheh to be from those that provide those places for people b'ezrat Hashem.