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Tomorrow can be different from today.
Our lives often leave us feeling hopeless—like nothing will ever change. But perspective is everything. When you know where to look, hope can be found in the spaces and places you least expect.
Join Jason Gore (Lead Pastor of Hope Community Church) for a fresh perspective, practical steps, and weekly encouragement that hope really is possible… even in real life.
WEBVTT - This file was automatically generated by VIMEO
What makes prime barbecue?
What is the heart of it? Whose story am I trying to tell?
Hmm. And when I started having those moments
of reflection without all the distraction, then I started
to realize how I could build prime barbecue
and the purpose of prime barbecue
and the why behind Prime barbecue
and how I want my principles and values.
What are those? I started actually flushing those out
and I put it in them on the restaurant walls.
And these are the things I'm gonna hold myself accountable
to hold my employees accountable to. And we just did it.
Welcome to the Hope and Real Life podcast with Jason Gore.
Our team is passionate
and committed to bringing you more hope in the everyday real
areas of your life.
If this conversation and content is valuable for you,
please do us a favor, like, subscribe, and even share.
You never know how valuable it could be
to share a little bit of hope with someone else.
Let's get the conversation started.
Well, hello
and welcome to this edition
of The Hope in Real Life podcast.
So thankful that you had spent some time with us this week.
We are talking about a topic that I know is going to be
so relevant to so many,
and it's called The Secret Sauce to Success.
Why The Secret Sauce? Because we are here with Chris pto,
owner and operator of Prime Barbecue, Pitmaster barbecue,
nerd, author.
The list goes on and on.
But Chris, welcome to the show. Thanks for being here with us.
Yeah. So excited to be here. Yeah.
And, and you know what, I'm gonna say this,
I'm just gonna catch myself right outta that.
I just said Chris, it's Christopher. Yes.
He he goes by Christopher. Yes.
And we gotta make sure that we nail that right, regardless
of what I've got written down here in my show.
Also with us Sunset Set, we've got Dwayne Calvin, uh, one
of our head guys around here at Hope Community Church,
and also a barbecue enthusiast.
Oh, yes. Especially when it comes to Prime.
Oh, yes. And so, uh, Dwayne, welcome to the show.
Well let, let's do this.
So Prime, just so everybody understands,
and this episode is gonna be around, what, what does it mean
to, to find success in our life?
And we're talking specifically now, though, with an owner
of a barbecue restaurant
that has found Success Prime is considered the number one
barbecue restaurant in the Triangle.
That was by the n and o here recently.
And I know, like in the Nation's Top 50. Yeah.
From, which was the, which publication was
It? Uh, Southern Living.
Southern
Living, yeah. So lemme
ask you this.
How and why did you realize
that barbecue was gonna be your thing?
I think it's everyone's thing, to be honest.
Uh, I think we're connected to cooking over a life fire.
I've never met anyone, even a vegetarian that isn't like,
oh, that meat smells so good over that fire.
Yeah. Like, we are drawn and connected to that.
For me, honestly, when I was really young,
my father came from Puerto Rico, uh, to get his pc, Texas a
and m and I was born in Texas,
and a group of scientists took him to eat barbecue.
And my dad became a fan of barbecue first. Hmm.
And I immediately was drawn to it when I first saw it,
when I first ate it, when he first took me.
But it, it was honestly the joy.
It brought my father and me going like, every son does.
I wanna make you happy, dad. Hmm.
I wanna be, I want to give you that joy. Yeah.
That was when I was like, dad,
I'm gonna cook barbecue for you.
And that was that. The reason why I started, to be honest,
is to make my father happy.
Wow. And it turned into a discipline,
and then it turned into, wow,
this is a powerful tool just in general.
Like, if I cook really great brisket,
like I could trade this for anything.
You know, this is more powerful than gold
or money or riches.
I mean, briskets motivates people, uh,
or whole hog or ribs or anything.
So that's kind of how it all started. Gotcha.
Yeah. So Chris, you know, it's one thing to have a passion
for barbecue and to start, uh, building a, a just a, the way
to cook it and how knowing how to do it,
but then there's a whole different thing that comes
with trying to turn it into a business.
Yeah. Like how did it actually become a business for you?
Or like something that you were working towards?
Yeah. Well, uh, I,
it was the thing I was always doing at all times.
And no matter, like, I was a very competitive soccer player
and I wanted to be a pro soccer player.
And then I was a very competitive, uh, just,
I love business in general.
So I was, I thought I was gonna be in international business
studies, traveling the world, doing business.
It started because I, I think your passion,
your purpose begin to align themselves.
Like no matter what direction you're going into,
when you start living out your purpose
and your passion at the same time, it's almost like,
why am I wasting my time with anything else?
Sure. Yeah. And then, uh, it was at that timing too.
I was at ECU
and everything I was doing in business school
was business driven.
So that's when I just, all my papers, no joke,
all my papers, all my studies, everything I read,
I was like, okay, but how does this relate to barbecue?
Oh, wow. Okay. And it just,
that's when it just started shifting.
Like the, the tide shifted in the direction of,
this is my life's work.
Now, did you start with the restaurant
or did you start, how'd you start? Like,
No, I didn't. Uh,
you start like anything great.
You have to start small and build it up. It's all momentum.
So it's, you know, passion doing it all the time.
Then I started cooking it for family and friends
and, you know, all your family
and friends are gonna tell you you're free.
Barbecue tastes delicious.
Of course, Of course. And then it was doing the due
diligence of eating at other barbecue restaurants I admired
and going, wow, this is way better than mine.
Why doesn't my family, do you admire
More barbecue restaurants in Texas
where you're from or in North Carolina?
I admire just the work in the craft behind it.
I don't care if it comes from Utah. Okay.
You know, I've come to that conclusion
because I, I ended up traveling the United States,
and all I do is eat barbecue.
Now I, I have to find inspiration over and over again. Yeah.
Just to push the craft I'm in now. But, uh, I forgot.
What were you even talking about?
Yeah, we were asking the question about did
you just start with a restaurant
Or did you start Oh, no, no, no.
And then I went from doing it to selling it.
Then my dad's company was like, Hey,
cook barbecue for this event.
And then I got really big into catering.
I worked in restaurants at the same time,
so I knew the process and procedure
of prep and getting it ready.
And then I started a catering company.
And then that catering company did moderately well.
I made, I made enough money to supply my habit
of cooking barbecue.
'cause you know, it's pits and charcoal and rubs
and traveling and eating barbecue
and meat freezers, all kinds of crazy contraptions.
And then it turned into, um, talking about it enough
and studying about it enough
where I started teaching about it.
And then I went into teaching catering,
and then the connections grew.
And then I went off in this space of TV
writing cookbooks.
And that's all by happenstance too. Wow.
It's, it's just opportunity meets luck, meets purpose.
And they all aligned. And that's how I got the cookbook.
That's how I started tv.
That's how I started doing everything.
And then I was really comfortable.
I was really doing a lot of catering.
I was really doing a lot of private events.
I was teaching barbecue.
It was the golden age of barbecue, I would say 2005. Sure.
And like the Franklin Barbecue kind of hit the market
and the busyness
and the money was good and everything was great.
And I didn't really have to do anything else.
I worked a full-time corporate job.
I did my barbecue hustle on the
weekends, was making great money.
But, uh, it was really the push for purpose.
Like, I had to take that step of, I have to go
with both feet in.
I can't have this, this one foot on one side of the fence,
one foot on the other side of the fence any longer.
I had to take that step of faith of turning myself
and stepping over the fence
and going, this is what my whole life's been for.
And I have to step with both feet in.
And the minute I did that, it was like finally,
not only resting, but just diving into that cold pool
after a hot day of the pit.
It's just like, ah, it's just, just breath of, this is it.
This is where I'm gonna live for now on
if you've ever cooked in front of
a pit, you know that feeling. Yeah.
And just, just for, uh, for some of our listeners
who might be listening and, and maybe they're at that place
where they feel like they've got one foot in one world
and one foot in another,
and they're trying to figure, okay, I wanna find success in
this other area for you that looked like saying, okay,
corporate job, I've gotta move on from that
and then jump full force into this restaurant.
And that's kind of when you made
a decision to launch the restaurant.
Okay. So I get this. That's great.
I love that because there's this theology now in the world,
like, you got a yolo.
Right. You know, just quit everything
and just do what you're passionate about
and it's all gonna work out.
Let me tell you, when I had two feet,
statistically speaking, that's not true.
I had two feet over the fence. Right. I had newborn twins.
Mm. I just became a husband.
And if you've ever been told you're having twins,
it's very confusing.
'cause I was like, no, I thought I was having one baby.
I was there. Speak to that. I was there.
Are there two heartbeats? No babies don't have two hearts.
No sir. You're having twins. No.
We're gonna wait three years and have the second one.
What are you talking about? I'm not ready for this.
I'm working, I'm three jobs out of college.
This can't be possible. Two feet, one foot had full medical.
I was doing really great in my corporate job.
I was very comfortable. The other one
was doing really great leaps
and bounds in barbecue better than people
who were two feet in really comfortable.
That's where the enemy sits, is in that comfort. Hmm.
He wants you to be comfortable. Hmm.
And when I heard that enough in my life,
and I felt that I've been
provided for when I had nothing,
when I had those three jobs.
And look at how with following my path
and my purpose, how that has brought me to the point I'm at,
it's time to turn my feet.
Yeah. Yeah. That's what's surrounding yourself
with wise people too.
Yeah. That's speaking to your life. Mentors huge. Right.
Reading the right material every single day for me, for me
scripture, knowing that
I am my own worst enemy.
Super important. Yeah. Very important.
I'm gonna tell myself, oh, you deserve this. Right. Right.
You want this. That's why the people around me,
I call 'em my collective.
They have authority over me.
They don't have, uh, what do they,
when I first started a small group, it was,
uh, accountability.
That was cute. I've never met this person in accountability.
Okay. I am gonna tell you just a little nugget.
These are people who know everything. Yeah.
Who I can't hide from
and who have authority to say that is not who you are
and you're not gonna do that.
And I need someone to tell me that. Mm-Hmm. Yeah.
Over my finances, over my decisions.
And it was at the point where all those things aligned along
with, you know, my wife's support, full support.
I'm not doing this. Anything without her. Yeah.
Anything without her. Yeah. And she's like, you're ready.
Okay. Okay. My collective said, oh, you're ready. Okay.
But I don't feel ready. The enemy wants me here. Yeah.
Turn your feet. Mm-Hmm. That's all I heard every day.
Turn your feet When I finally went like this,
it was terrible and hard.
Mm. Didn't get easy,
but I felt the alignment of purpose.
Yeah. And that has, the story has only gotten better.
It's still hard. Yeah. But this God, oh
Man, it's so, so great. Mean
EE Even as you're saying that,
I'm sitting here thinking, man, how do you find,
we're talking about success, but
how do you find success without purpose?
And uh, it sounds like what you're saying is, man,
even in the midst of things being a little less
clear, a little less certain.
But if I have the purpose,
then I know what it is. Then I'm working
For, well, let's find success. Yeah.
Even a measure of success. Right.
Yeah. How do we measure success? Right.
How do we define it? Yeah.
To me, barbecue guy, dyslexic student.
Christopher, how do you as a barbecue
guy describe success?
Just in general? Like I am?
No one special dyslexic c student struggled all the time.
I have lots of insecurities, lots of things I've,
there's nothing that makes me
any different than anyone else.
But I define success by living out your purpose.
It will never be money. Yeah. That's right.
It'll never be title and power.
'cause that's all temporary.
Yeah. What success, what's forever is purpose
and leaving a road of legacy behind you.
Yeah. When you live what you're created to be.
And everyone knows that.
That's why we, that's why I suggest if I don't know that
mentors Yeah.
People who pour into you, who help you define what that is,
surrounding yourself with not people
who are like, yeah, yeah.
You should do that. Yeah. Yeah. That's cool.
That sounds good. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
You shouldn't hang out with your wife.
You shouldn't do things with you like people
who are pouring into you, not agreeing with you.
Yeah. Then you're gonna start finding your purpose.
And once you find that purpose, then you have
to know the execution points behind it.
And they're just not like, oh, now I'm
gonna be, you know, whatever.
A professional juggler. Yeah. You know? Yeah.
You have to find other professional jugglers in that field.
You have to get mentors in it.
You have to know what the path is gonna look like.
It's all due diligence, to be honest.
It's pretty common sense. I'm a very non-smart guy.
And I like to say that way
because that's literally, I'm not smart.
I just believe in common sense.
And surrounding yourself with very smart people. Yeah.
If you are looking for a resource on personal development
or spiritual enrichment,
then we have got just the thing for you.
The Hope in Real Life mobile app, it's a free tool
and it's made specifically for our listeners
or anyone who's looking for a little bit more
hope in their everyday life.
The Hope in Real Life app of all offers
multiple features like daily devotions, parenting tips,
financial resources, marriage insights, uh,
and there's actually even a community section
where you can share prayer requests
and even know that somebody is praying for you.
I want you to stay tuned. What this resource is being
developed right now should be released soon.
So check it out. We'll keep you updated.
Don't forget, tomorrow can be better than today.
And hope is possible even in real life.
You know, you, you, uh,
you talked about stepping out into a restaurant
and launching that thing and getting it started,
turning your feet towards what you saw
as purpose in that moment.
And then, um, something happened along the way
where you started realizing that Prime was a unique thing.
That what you had started was something special.
What is it that makes your a restaurant special?
What is it that makes your team special?
Um, what is different about Prime?
You know, I, it's all in reflection of, you know,
that's why I think we have rear view mirrors in our car
so we can see what's behind us.
It's all in reflection of the, the,
the difficult parts to get there.
That's what makes it special. When I going into
Prime, we had everything.
Right. I'm telling you,
my entire vision has been drawn on a piece of paper.
And I explain that to people a lot.
If you have a vision for something, draw it, write it out,
frame it and put it on your wall.
The, my original drawing
of the restaurant I'm in, I drew in college.
Wow. It's in my office.
Hmm. So, like, I had this for a minute though. Yeah.
But when it started being built, man, I thought I'm,
I'm got, I got it going on.
My vision is looking great.
I have created something super special. Mm-Hmm.
It's, it's really unique
how when you start connecting your vision, your purpose,
how much I comes into the equation.
Right. Not knowing that that's the center
of sin to begin with.
Yeah. Is when you start using that letter. Mm-Hmm.
And then we went off with a very popular band,
10th Avenue North, the singer Mike Donahue.
Yeah. Mm-Hmm. To go through the MLB Spring training camps.
I met a guy on a cruise who happened
to know all these MLB guys
and they're like, Hey,
cook barbecue at every spring training camp
with this great worship leader,
and you're gonna do these great things.
And then I was gonna come back and shoot a TV show.
Then right after that TV show,
I was gonna launch my restaurant,
which everyone from Food Network was gonna come.
Wow. Bought plane tickets
and we were gonna do this big concert raise
money for Wounded Warrior Project.
It was the grandest opening that my heart has ever desired,
that my brain has ever envisioned.
I could not add anything else.
It was a hundred percent of everything I've ever wanted.
And then I remember getting that phone call
from the producer of, uh, Bobby Fle
and going, Hey, there's something happening in China.
This is while I was in Florida. We might delay the show.
Oh, what's happening in China?
Like, I remember Googling what's happening in China
and then seeing, you know, about Covid.
Yeah. And then as we started finishing
and buttoning up Florida, the,
the call started coming more and more.
And then, Hey, this is really coming to the States.
I think we're gonna delay the show.
Which is interesting 'cause you were in Florida
and to this day, I still don't think Covid
ever made it to Florida. No.
Or Texas. It wasn't in there. Yep.
But everything started as I started coming closer
to North Carolina falling apart.
So then the GCs called
and said, we can't finish your restaurant.
All my network friends called
and said, Hey, we can't fly out for your opening.
Wow. Everything started shutting down.
And then when I got to the restaurant, I had nothing.
My grand opening was just existing. It was pretty pointless.
Like we just existed on a random Tuesday.
So I had to be completely broken down of everything
that I had around me to make prime barbecue.
Great. And it had to be completely diminished.
And then I had to really understand
what makes prime barbecue?
What is the heart of it? Whose story am I trying to tell?
Hmm. And when I started having those moments
of reflection without all the distraction, then I started
to realize how I could build prime barbecue
and the purpose of prime barbecue
and the why behind Prime Barbecue
and how I want my principles and values.
What are those? I started actually flushing those out
and I put it in them on the restaurant walls.
And these are the things I'm gonna hold myself accountable
to hold my employees accountable to.
And we just did it. And then it started becoming great.
And then I started realizing that what we're trying
to do has nothing to do with a barbecue.
It's all about the intentionality beyond that tray of food.
And when you have that aha moment, you're like,
I don't even need a great,
great barbecue to make this impactful.
The people come in, they're hungry, they want to be filled.
As long as I fill them beyond that tray,
they're gonna keep coming.
Yeah. Because they want that over
and over again to be satisfied by something.
And prime barbecue. Is that something? Yeah.
Quick off topic now. So you're originally in Florida.
This is just me being curious here.
Were you originally gonna launch Prime in Florida?
Or were you just living in Florida?
Because right now, just for our listeners Yeah.
The restaurant is in Nightdale North
Hunt. Yeah, it's in night Dale.
We were
Traveling Through Florida
because the MLB Spring training camps were in Florida.
Okay. So I had to go to,
there are multitudes all around Florida.
All the MYB guys either go to Florida
or Arizona for their spring training camps.
So we did like the Cardinals, the Rays, the Toronto,
some, some I know the Cardinals like really well. Ballou,
Jays, Toronto. You said Toronto?
Yeah. Blue Jay's.
All I know is the Cardinals and the Astros.
'cause that's who I follow a ton. A lot
Of birds. A
Lot of birds. Yeah. Lots of birds,
lots of giant jack dudes with lots
of tattoos and really cool cars would show up.
So it was really just a random hodgepodge.
And all my job was just to cook barbecue
and tell 'em why I cook barbecue.
And it was, that was it.
But I was meeting and hanging out
with these great sports people and I'm like, this is it.
We have arrived. We're gonna be great.
All this momentum's gonna push us over the top.
And then God was like, oh, okay.
Let's, let's make sure you're focused on me
and I'm gonna remove absolutely a hundred percent
of everything that you depend on.
I think Covid was only created for me. Hmm. And I'm sorry.
I always apologize to everyone else.
Covid was created for me
'cause I had my eyes too far off Jesus.
That he had to completely annihilate everything I ever
depended on so I could open May of 2020 Yeah.
And then have one human being in that restaurant.
That piece of paper was meaningless.
'cause that's not how my story started. Yeah.
It started through the back of a parking lot,
completely masked up with gloves going,
I hope you like my barbecue.
And I can tell you my story in this one box. Wow.
'cause all the beautiful restaurant and the shovels
and the pictures of me and all the TV
shows, that's all gone.
Wow. So it just, I had to push past that.
So now that we have everything, we're just starting,
we didn't arrive to anything.
We're beginning our story.
All that hard work I did
before, all those late nights by myself, prepping
by myself in my kitchen, all those
events I had to do by myself.
All that hustling I had to do to become successful.
Quotes was just to start once I put two feet in. Yeah.
This is, this is gonna be a great story right here for,
uh, that I wanna make sure
our listeners get a chance to hear.
We talked about already to, to you,
success is living out your purpose.
Yep. Now, I know that for you, Christopher, your
faith has a lot to do with your purpose.
Yeah. And so, uh, I know that play works its way into
and plays out now in your personal and professional journey.
But for our listeners,
and some might be Christians, some might not be, I know
for you, you're a follower of Jesus.
I would love for you just to take a moment, let us know,
like, how did you come to a place where you're like,
you know what, I'm gonna be a follower of Jesus.
What was that road look like? Did you grow up that way?
Or did something happen along the way?
Yeah. I don't think you come to a place.
I think you come to the end of yourself. Hmm.
It's not like I'm, I'm going to, to a destination.
I have to come to a place where there's no more road
to drive where your car's dead outta gas.
Where you just have to get out and start walking.
And then after you walk
and you can't no longer take those steps anymore.
When your feet become too sore and your knees,
and then you fall to your knees and then you crawl,
and then you can't crawl anymore.
You can't breathe anymore. You can't.
And you really feel how people feel when they come
to the end of themselves.
How suicidal, anything of that nature
where they're like, I'm done.
Yeah. And you fall.
That's when Jesus is like, oh,
he's been here the whole time.
Yeah, that's right. I finally had, I, I didn't get
to the end of the road.
I was the guy who had to fall dead on my face.
Like I fought every single day away from that moment to know
that I am not capable, a fulfillment.
Like I can't yolo anymore.
And for me, it was a buser who worked
with me who became a server.
But just seeing the joy in his every day was very annoying.
That's how it started with just annoying.
Because I was very successful. I was very bravado.
I was very connected with my sin. I was okay with it.
Like I tell people in barbecue, I have no idea
that I smell like brisket when
I leave the barbecue restaurant.
Hmm. I have no idea. But if I go into a Walmart
or something, getting my kids something, everyone
around me is like, oh, you smell like brisket.
And I'm like, I don't smell it.
That's how I was with my sin.
Like, even when people go, well, that's not good.
You're killing yourself, or That's not good.
Those things you're putting in your body aren't great.
I could easily ignore that.
'cause I was like, I, I'm in it so much.
How's it hurting me? But it, it's in barbecue.
I have to literally take a shower. When I take a shower.
The water changes, the nitrates stick to your hair,
gel go in your skin.
You can blow black snot. It's really intense.
That's a barbecue life though. Right.
But to visually see it, you're just like, huh,
I really am filthy.
Yeah. I did not recognize that.
And I came to the end of that when I started hating Joshua,
admiring Joshua, because secretly admiring him,
hating him, but going, oh, kind of like that,
that he can find joy.
And then that admiration turned into conviction,
turned into conflict, turned into me
starting then my car ran outta gas.
Then I was walking, then I was crawling, then I died.
And then when I finally died, I said, Joshua, I'm dead.
I have nowhere else to go. And he was like, oh, cool.
That's awesome. And he pointed to Christ. Hmm. Wow.
That's all he did. He never once told me about Jesus.
Never once really pushed things on me. He just loved me.
Well, through the whole time, he literally did not say,
I don't have to walk anymore.
He would just walk beside me. Mm-Hmm.
And then when I hit my knees
and started crawling, he would crawl beside me.
And then when I finally died, he stood up, which I couldn't.
And he pointed to Jesus, the worst day of your life
to me, and I tell this to people all the time,
is the day I came to know Jesus,
it was the worst day of my life.
That's when I died. After crawling.
The best day of my life was the next day when I no longer
had to find fulfillment anymore.
When my longing disappeared, and when I became full,
and when Jesus loved me, without me needing to do anything,
and I could finally live out my purpose.
That's, that was a great day for me
and changed the whole theology of success.
Hey, if you currently are not connected to a church, or,
or maybe you're not sure about the whole faith thing,
or you, you gave up on church a long time ago, I want you
to understand, like, church hurt is a real thing.
And so that's understandable. But you don't need
to miss out on the encouragement
and on the hope that that, that knowing Jesus
and being part of a community of believers has to offer.
So I wanna tell you about something here. Get Hope tv.
It's an online church experience
where you'll find engaging music, uh, a message
that's relevant to the everyday moments of your life.
Uh, and, and it's that that service is put on
by Hope Community Church.
And I hope our greatest desires that people would come
to know who God really is, would be able to walk in his ways
and, and find the ways to experience hope in the everyday
moments of our lives.
Listen, you don't have to have everything all figured
out to to tune in with us.
Uh, you can, even if you're meant you, you're at home.
So feel free, stay in your pajamas,
listen at the gym when you're getting in your workout.
But get Hope TV online,
Sunday mornings 9:30 AM 11:15 AM There's even an option
to join us on Saturdays at 4:15 PM or 6:00 PM as well.
Wherever you are, you're welcome.
We'd love to have you tune in with us at Get Hope tv.
And so now you've got this like newfound faith, right?
You've just decided to follow Jesus
for the first time in your life,
but you got this barbecue thing going to Yeah.
And at some point, these two things
kind of come together for you.
Um, can you explain what that journey looked like,
just putting those two things together?
Well, I mean, when you come to know Jesus,
you have this thing inside of you, which
very hard to explain.
And even when I came to know Jesus
and I had it explained to me, it was very hard to hear.
That's the Holy Spirit that lives inside of you. Yeah.
But when you start living out, it starts speaking
through you in a very unique way
because you no longer have scales.
You no longer have the enemy telling you what to do.
You no longer have the weight of your sin.
You have this newfound thinking process.
You have a new heart. You have a new way of loving.
Even the people who annoyed you
or you, you couldn't forgive.
It's just easy. You're just speaking to 'em. Yeah.
Like the person who just destroyed your life.
You could say, I love you and everything's good,
and I forgive you that easy to me just
because the weight of everything I carried when I
died, disappeared.
So I could for the first time be my who I'm meant to be.
And, you know, connecting with people was a lot different.
And here I am, cooking barbecue, talking to people, catering
for people, cutting for people.
I mean, even from the board talking to 'em. Mm-Hmm.
Hey, how are you doing today? Like it,
this Holy Spirit just started pouring out of me.
And then it was, no, it was always a beginning of barbecue,
but the end of who Jesus is.
Hmm. That's how the conversation kept going.
And then the minute you see someone
dead in their eyes and in their heart come
to life in Christ, to see yourself
and to know what the end of that is
and what the new beginning is, that changes who you are.
Yeah. Mm-Hmm. I think that's the
most important thing for a Christian.
To see someone come from death to life to witness it. Yeah.
That's why I admire doctors.
Like, why do you want to be a doctor?
Have you ever seen someone dead?
And then I brought 'em back to life.
And then them live their journey and meet 'em 30 years later
and say, you could have been dead.
Right. Like that is,
and a, a really rocking feeling.
And you don't have to be the doctor.
You could be the plumber, you could be the barbecue guy.
You could be the the tax person. Mm-Hmm. It doesn't matter.
Your role, death to life exists in all
of us when we know Jesus.
Yeah. We're filled with that Holy Spirit.
And when I started doing that in barbecue over and over,
and I started seeing people come from death to life,
and I'm like, wait, are we talking about barbecue anymore?
Is this even about that? Right.
Like, it's pouring and starting
and ending in a different way.
And then I was like, I really feel my life
is to build the kingdom for Jesus.
That's his prophet. That's what that, that, that when I died
and I made that agreement to die
to myself and to live for him.
That's the one part of the deal.
He asked me, I just want you to make disciples
and talk about that story.
I said, okay. And I'm serious when I, when I I,
when I'm a friend to you, well, I'm a friend.
I'm that one Ben Affleck movie where he calls this boy
and he is like, Hey, we gotta hurt some people.
Okay. Are we taking your car or mine? Right.
Where are we hiding the bodies? Yeah.
I like, I I'm I'm down. Yeah.
That's, but I mean, I have a unit mentality. Yeah.
Like, I'm really devout, like I'm really strong-willed and,
and the most, the one thing
that carried the most weight in my life
that couldn't allow me to be who I am.
And that was taken and that person asked me to do one thing.
Mm-Hmm. Oh, I'm gonna do it till my knees bleed,
till I'm on my hands till I can't move anymore.
When I leave this earth, it's the last thing I'm gonna do.
And say, as long as I have my faculties.
'cause I have no idea after. Right.
I'm eighties, all that barbecue
smoke, who knows what happens.
Right. So, I mean,
you do something unique at the restaurant.
Uh, I've had a chance to experience it.
It's like a little bit of a tour right.
Where you walk people around the building
and this kind of infuses the two things together.
Uh, can you just share a little bit about those
tours and what that's about? Yeah.
Well, the barbecue tour was first kind of imagined
because we eat at a lot of barbecue homes at that water,
eat at a lot of barbecue restaurants.
Um, and we always saw barbecue pits were in the back.
And that was always intriguing to us when the golden age
of barbecue came and there was TV about it.
Now the kid, the mother, the father, the uncle,
they all wanna see the barbecue pits,
the secret behind barbecue.
And I said, Hey, when we do our restaurant,
we're gonna have it all visual
and we're gonna give them a tour.
We're gonna take the time to get to know people
because the intentionality is there in hospitality.
You have to be intentional.
And we love talking about barbecue,
and I wanna show 'em like,
we're not cooking hamburgers and hot dogs here.
You know what I mean? Yeah. Like,
I'm not throwing something on the grill.
Right. This is a long laborous love Yeah.
That we put into it. So when people are like,
why are you outta brisket?
Well, I can't microwave a brisket though. Right? Right.
Like, this takes 48 hours to craft and create
and we have to guess when we're out, we're out.
And, uh, we want to kinda show that validation.
And then it turned, it wasn't until like I started really,
I died to myself in 2020 when I brought
Covid again, I apologize.
I realized that that pit room had to be more, believe it
or not, I did not have that
as an evangelistic piece until Covid.
I just wanted to show my stuff off. Gotcha.
If I'm being transparent Oh yeah.
If I transparent, safe place, no place. Yeah.
And I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm a devout like, follower of Jesus,
but I still have that,
like the enemy's taking me one degree off course.
That's all he is doing. Hey,
you're doing great, you're doing great.
You're doing great. And I'm in this water
of like, how did I even get here?
But I do, I,
after 2020, I realized that if I'm gonna make an impact one
by one, if I'm gonna build the kingdom brick by brick,
then I have to do it in this tour.
And that's when I really started making it a point.
And again, I had no like plan.
I just let the Holy Spirit speak.
And when you start speaking about your past
and how you came to the end of yourself,
it naturally comes out.
When I'm sitting with someone mentoring them, they're like,
I don't know how to evangelize.
I don't know how to build that into my business.
I'm like, tell me who you were. Tell me when you came
to death, tell me who you are now.
Like I want you to look in your rear view mirror.
And as I spoke over
and over about myself, I'm like, my first shovel,
my first barbecue pit sits on the wall.
All my awards. Like I can see the award
and how hard it was to travel there
and do that and win that award.
I could feel the turmoil of what I did.
Even if you have to have like a visual component at work
to look at who you are and who, who God made you to be.
And then that started turning into this evangelistic piece.
And then I do this, I I, not that I hide
the piece of scripture, it was all by happenstance is
where God placed it, but you don't see it till the very end.
And I physically have to turn you and you have to look up
and you're like, oh, there's a piece of scripture there.
Yeah. I started to speak to that.
And the reason why I spoke to
that is when I was first discipled by Joshua,
he said this piece of scripture to me and I wrote it down.
And that's what I built prime barbecue off of
because that's what pierced my heart.
That was the first time scripture went pop
with a little tiny pin.
And I was like, ah, this light came in. Mm-Hmm.
And it happened to do be about food.
Obviously I'm around that a lot.
But the more I started speaking about the scripture,
I really believe that reading scripture, no matter
how many times you read it tells you a different story.
Yeah. Mm-Hmm. And every time I read that piece of scripture,
which I try to do as much in a day to as many people
as I can, it speaks differently to me.
Yeah. The Holy Spirit said, today, you're gonna say this.
Yeah. Today, this is how it reflects you
and this is how you're gonna pour into them.
And when I started seeing people come
to know Jesus in a pit room, falter their knees,
and I cried with them Hmm.
Sit on the table and cry with them.
Death to life. I've never known to be
so drained after something.
Now I know like the burden the pastor carries
Mm-Hmm. Drained.
You're emotionally drained
because you have to help recognize
that weighted sin to see it on somebody.
You just want to run over to 'em as a Christian.
Oh, let pull it off. But knowing that only Jesus can. Right.
And when Jesus does and you have to weep with them
and build them up, that takes a lot outta you.
Mm-Hmm. You have to go through that over and over.
And I know this is my calling,
but then I started in the path of the pit room
started maybe being the enemy's way
of keeping me distracted.
Mm-Hmm. Like,
look at the great work you're doing, just staying here.
Do this all the time. And then I was getting weary,
discipling people, showing 'em where to church go to.
Like I was getting weary even on my good work. Mm-Hmm.
You know, my purpose, my success still made me weary
and I couldn't find rest.
And then that started working against me.
So it's like no matter what direction I go into
and my purpose or whatever you do in life,
the enemy follows me.
And that's why it's really important to keep
that collective, to have that strong marriage Mm-Hmm.
Where you can rest with your wife
to understand the rest I get in scripture every day.
That was the hardest thing to do. Yeah.
As a 25-year-old to read the Bible.
When did you first read the Bible?
So, my story's a little different, man.
I, I, so I, I actually grew up in a church setting
and then I spent some time,
some things happening kind of just before high school.
So I spent high school and college running away.
But I make the jokes. So I grew up in this tiny little
Baptist church Uhhuh, uh, farm community.
I mean, and so I joke around, I,
I tell people I knew the Bible better when
I was like nine Sure.
Than I do now. I think.
Um, so I, I kinda grew up engaged in scripture,
but then, uh, post college,
it was different post-college when it's like,
someone's not making you do this.
You do come to a place at the end of yourself Mm-Hmm.
And you're like, oh, wait a minute. And use the analogy.
So then pricked scripture pricked my heart.
Um, and the moment that that happened, mm-Hmm.
Uh, and, and scripture kind of took on a new light for me.
That was probably my sophomore year in college.
But what about someone who's never read it? Right.
Who's just opening it. Even a King James Bible.
Oh yeah. That's Tough. I was like,
just swipe it outta me.
Right. Someone who's dyslexic
who doesn't even read Well Yeah.
Who doesn't retain information.
And then you gimme some weird language
of a story I don't understand.
And it's frustrating. And the book's so big.
And I'm like, I gotta read this whole thing
to be live a better life and blah, blah, blah.
It's frustrating. It is.
Yeah. That's where discipling comes in.
That's where small group comes in.
That's where having a good pastor who only speaks out
of scripture comes in.
And that helped me take the little tiny,
like, I wasn't eating meat then
I was taking little baby bottles.
Like I had no idea what, where to attack this thing.
I'm a Gideon. If you don't know that I'm
youngest Gideon in my chapter.
You are the youngest Gideon in America. You are
Probably, I I love giving that
because I, I understand the mentality
of giving someone a Bible for the first time.
It's very overwhelming. Yeah.
And but that scripture's so important.
It's so like giving, it's almost like you have to read this.
Yeah. Like everything you're asking me, I learned here.
Yeah. And then they open page one
and they're like, how do you, this is a terrible book,
and they just slide it right off.
Right. So I get it.
But I'm the synopsis, all the, the self-help books,
management books, blah, blah, blah that I read, I read.
But the first thing I read is scripture.
'cause that's the one thing that always says different.
All the other self-help books.
I'm just going back to my highlighted sections. Right.
And Oh yeah, yeah, I remember that.
But every time I go to my highlighted sections, my Bible,
I'm like, what?
Uh, it says something completely different. Right.
I went there because I thought I needed
to re remind myself of this.
But that's telling me a whole different thing.
That's the only book that's ever done that to me.
And I'm not smart enough to retain information.
My brain is not designed that way. So,
So what, what would you say to people who,
who might be listening and, and maybe they are a believer,
but, but we've talked about, I mean, your purpose
and what you do now Mm-Hmm.
Is to make sure that the name of Jesus is lifted
up and people are pointing to him.
What would you say to somebody who's struggling
with the idea of how do I share my faith
or live out my faith in the
workplace? What would you say to them?
Yeah. So someone who already knows Christ
that's trying to do that in the workplace.
Yeah. Well that's why you have a church. Yeah.
Everyone in a church is all different backgrounds.
The Holy Spirit speaks to them in different ways.
And they all call, they all should. That's the body.
They all should come together and teach you.
Your pastor should teach you, I am a plumber
and I want people to know who Jesus is,
but I also want to be the best plumber possible.
Yeah. And I know that my sin was big enough
that I have to be put up my end of the deal.
How do I do it? Well,
there's someone who's an evangelist in your church.
There's someone who's also a plumber
in your church who does it well.
There's someone and you all get together
and you strategically plan that out.
I did not do what I did by myself. Hmm.
I make that completely clear.
When I started seeing the fruit in it,
I started surrounding myself with many people
that could help me build that as possible.
Going, this works like living your purpose,
using your, your, your, your professional.
Whatever you do to leverage the gospel is
what you're supposed to be doing.
Not if you're in this industry.
People, everyone, if you call yourself a follower
of Christ needs to have your own tour.
Mm. Everyone needs to have a call to the aisle daily
because you are not guaranteed tomorrow.
But you don't have to worry about it
'cause of your eternity.
But I don't wanna sit at Jesus's feet tomorrow, realize
how huge he is in my life.
Give him all the praise of everything I've ever wanted.
And notice only then how big he is. Mm-Hmm mm-Hmm.
And say, oh, but I have to go back.
There's 15 more people now
that I'm at your feet and I know this.
There's 15 more people I have to just pull at and tell
and strategically figure out.
I don't want it then. I want it now. Yeah. Mm-Hmm.
I want to go to his feet and said, I went to the end
and I collapsed for you.
'cause you went to the end of the cross
and collapsed for me.
I don't want to do it. You have to do that now.
And your best mission field is your professional workplace.
That's good. Period. That's
A good word. That's good.
So Chris,
you probably got a guy out here right now who's listening
to this podcast in our audience and,
and they are trying to figure it out.
Um, they've come to a place in life
where they don't feel like they have enough
resources, they don't have enough support.
Yeah. Maybe even not the best measure
of success in their lives.
Um, and I probably, you probably learned
so much over the years on the journey.
What would you say the best piece of advice to share
with that person would be?
Well, I mean, if you wanna measure something, you're,
you're, you're staring at your cup every day.
And I'm speaking from a male perspective
because I'm very bravado and I had a, a great father who
provided for us, and he is very old school disciplinarian.
And he's like, the measure
of your success is filling this cup.
And then when it becomes full, you retire
and then you lower your cup.
And I was like, I got it, dad. I'm gonna make you happy.
I'm gonna fill my cup.
So every day I am pouring into success, power, love,
attention, anything I need to do to fill this cup,
just to realize the next day the cup looked like this.
And I'm like, crap, I almost had a fool yesterday.
I'm gonna start over today.
And then, you know, remember, while I'm filling this cup,
I'm layering girlfriend, wife, children, you know,
new job, more responsibility.
And the weight of trying to fill that cup is slower
and it becomes harder to fill.
Not because you don't want it full, just
because you can't lift the water as fast as possible just
to get that one phone call to drain your cup again.
And then I just ask the common sense.
Just look at the bottom of your cup, y'all, there's a leak
And only Jesus's blood plugs that leak Because the day
after you realize that leak is there
and your cup becomes empty
and you realize you can't fill it,
and you put Jesus's blood there
the next day without doing a single thing, that cup is full
full where you can't even hold it
because you think you might spill it.
Yeah. But what happens when you start
to do those things again, more purposeful in your life,
that cup, what does it do after it becomes full flows?
It overflows and it saturates. Wow.
Look at over here's my marriage has fallen apart
over here's the kids that I never thought I'm gonna be a
good enough dad for over here's my career, over here's
the longing that I kept behind my heart
that I never shared with anyone.
You can't do that until you come to the end of yourself.
A coveted relationship is what you get with Jesus
coveted, transparent.
You can't hide from him. He sees your sin. He knows it.
He's okay with it. What you have to do is give it to him
so he can nail it to a cross so you no longer carry it.
So you're not being satisfied anymore.
You're being fulfilled and you can start living your life
finally By resting.
You ever hear that the most successful person
all the time you ever hear 'em say on the podcast the Gary
Vees, Hey, you gotta hustle hard horse so hard.
You ever hear him say, Hey, you know
what you gotta do to be successful?
You gotta rest. Yeah. Why don't you do that tomorrow?
Do nothing. Huh? That doesn't make any sense.
It's not supposed to. Jesus is bigger than your thoughts.
And the more you get to know him,
the more things don't make sense.
And the more rest you find and the more purpose you find,
and the more love you find, the more forgiveness you find,
and you become a better leader, you become a better servant.
You become a better husband, you become a better father,
become a better friend.
And you start to understand that you no longer have to walk
that path anymore.
It's put onto a cross for you.
And then that's, that's how you really enjoy success is
by rest in Jesus.
Mm-Hmm. And him taking that, that to the
Cross. That's good. That's good,
man. Thank you, Christopher.
Uh, a as we wrap up here, we've been on for a bit.
Let, let me, uh, two que I'll ask one.
And I, I think Dwayne's got one Sure.
He's gonna, gonna wrap up with as well.
But, uh, I, I'd love to hear,
and for our listeners, what's next for Prime Barbecue?
Well, man, I would love
to know too, you're gonna bring one
To Garner Garner North John.
Man, I get that all the time.
I really feel that people now
yelling out areas get it, I get it Off Springs.
We originally were supposed to be in Apex,
and then we got pulled to Nightdale
because we were called to Nightdale.
And I really feel now that I, sorry, again, I brought Covid
and I came to the end of myself there.
And this is Jesus's story.
He's gonna direct me through, again, my collective
and all the people around me where I go next.
Because now this is a ministry
and the ministry has to, you know, produce fruit, has
to connect with people, has to build,
this is not my four walls.
Prime does not live within four walls.
This is not my business. I don't take it with me.
So I have to follow his calling to where I go to next
that does it provide fruit.
So that's how we look at the business,
because I'm talking the two brothers in Christ.
Yeah. So
what my politically correct answer is we're we're observing
different areas to see
where prime barbecue can strategically
make the biggest impact.
Mm-Hmm. That's the politically correct answer I give
to a lot of people, but literally I don't care people in my
purpose, not my profits.
Yeah. So I don't really care about growing the business
and making, making more money that brings me nothing
but what my purpose is, is to bring people to know Jesus.
So if that builds his profit, I'm all for it.
Let's plant heck the, in the parking lot
behind prime barbecue.
Right. If he's like, Hey, I want you
to put another one in the parking lot.
I was like, that doesn't make any common sense,
but neither did opening in night Dale.
Right. But if it builds his purpose,
well, that's what I'm supposed to do.
Yeah. And it'll be awkward for sure.
Well, yeah, I mean, I'm sure you got
a ton going on in your life.
Uh, what, what's next for Chris Topher? Christopher?
Yeah. Christopher, what's next for
Christopher? Uh,
well, um, you know, my thing, my, my focus is always,
uh, just, you know, every February I take that time
to spend time with my wife.
Uh, January I do an RD trip with my team, uh,
February I build with my wife.
Uh, that's what's always next on my plate.
So if we're talking about you take a month
To build time out with your wife. Oh
Yeah. Well, we take a
cruise with, we support family life
and we like to do a lot of stuff.
I think the enemy breaks families.
When he breaks families, he wins generations. Yes. Wow.
So I really want the core of my relationship with my wife
to be strong and to be reflection of, of who Christ is.
So, uh, that's what's next for me, then spending
as much time with my kids as possible.
And then really I'm working on the barbecue nerd side.
I'm trying to rebrand that
because I'm trying to find a way to be a face
and a personality for people in their homes,
but still evangelize strongly to them.
And there's a couple of different people in Food Network
who do that well, uh, who are open Christians.
And believe it or not, that's really awkward.
I've done, when I did Chopped
and I prayed over the meal, it chopped,
everyone looked at me like, did you just
kill someone in front of us?
Right. It was very awkward.
And, you know, that's what I'm trying to get to next is
that personal branding.
And I really like talking to business owners, um,
who know Jesus and trying to get them to figure out
how they can work the ministry in their businesses.
I think that's really important because that's, we're all
after the same bottom line.
Yeah. Professional Christian or CEO Yeah.
Of, you know, a rubber made company. Yeah.
The same bottom line if we call
ourselves followers or Christ.
So that's what our main focus is this year.
Wife, kids, the kingdom. Yeah.
Awesome. Well, Christopher, man,
I greatly appreciate the time.
Yeah, yeah. But this is one of those episodes where I've,
I'm, I'm leaving better, I'm leaving more focused.
I'm more leaving with my purpose and clear view.
And so thank you so much. I I said this before.
I'm, um, I'm, I could not be more thankful, uh, for
what it is that you do in our community for two reasons.
One for creating some pretty dang good food. All right?
So let's go. And so, and so, so that's number one.
Uh, but on top of that man, and,
and really this is the heart of what you are,
but man, you, this podcast is about bringing hope in real
life, and you're doing that through every single day of
what it is that you do through Prime.
So man, we're, I'm grateful for it. Thanks for the time.
To our listeners, everything that we talked about today,
if there's some things we'll have, you know,
we're in the heck is Prime Barbecue in Nightdale.
Where is Nightdale? We'll have all that in the show notes
and anything else that you need access to share this podcast
with somebody else who you believe might need a bit more
hope in the everyday moments of your life.
We love you guys. Thanks for tuning in,
and we look forward to seeing you next episode.
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