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Welcome to the Bridge Church VB Podcast, your weekly source for uplifting and transformative Sunday messages! Each episode features insightful, practical teachings rooted in Scripture, designed to inspire and guide you on your spiritual journey. Led by our passionate Lead Pastors, Archie and Tangie Callahan, we strive to create a welcoming environment that encourages individuals from all walks of life to connect with the person, power, and purpose of Jesus Christ.
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0.000000 6.260000 We're going to continue the series called Family Ties and we're going to talk about covenant love how to
6.260000 12.920000 Strengthen the marriage bond and pastor Scott kicked it off last week. He did a great job. Give him a hand
12.920000 16.680000 Man, he's a great preacher of the gospel and
16.680000 23.760000 Did a great job, but I want you to take out your Bibles and turn to Genesis chapter 2 and Matthew chapter 19
23.760000 26.280000 You know when you begin to talk about
26.960000 30.840000 Structures such as the one we're sitting in it's a building
30.840000 39.640000 But it has a foundation and you're sitting in a chair that's sitting on the foundation that holds this structure up right
39.640000 46.260000 Foundations are very important in life without a good steady strong solid rock foundation
46.260000 48.720000 This building would not last
48.720000 56.860000 God created several institutions. He created the family. He created government and he created created church
57.500000 68.220000 And each one of those institutions finds its foundation in Jesus. Jesus is the foundation of those institutions the family government and the church and
68.220000 74.780000 Once you strip Jesus out of any one of those institutions those institutions
74.780000 79.220000 Guess what they do they fail they?
80.700000 88.600000 Employed they go down because the only thing that holds those institutions together is Jesus
88.600000 92.360000 Paul said this in 1 Corinthians chapter 3 verse 11
92.360000 97.300000 No man can lay a foundation of them in the one which is laid which is Jesus Christ
97.300000 102.740000 back in 2012 there was a building in the capital city of Ghana
102.740000 105.340000 That collapsed
105.340000 107.340000 totally collapsed
107.580000 110.140000 Nine people were killed many were injured
110.140000 116.380000 What made it so significant was this right here that the building was only nine months old and
116.380000 126.140000 The spokesperson for the city of Ghana said this after the building collapsed the foundation was not good enough
126.140000 130.980000 When it comes to marriage we have to have a strong foundation
131.780000 139.100000 For foundation is not strong or marriages our relationships and everything around us will begin to collapse
139.100000 147.780000 I remember when I was 14 in 1984 in Scaling County, North Carolina there was a storm front that was moving through
147.780000 153.940000 And it happened to be a very dangerous storm front that spawned many tornadoes
153.940000 157.820000 It's called the Carolinas tornado outbreak
157.820000 165.500000 It's it's found in print. It was one of the greatest outbreaks in North Carolina and South Carolina history
165.500000 170.660000 And so we were sitting in our home and and this storm was passing by we didn't know it was
170.660000 175.540000 Tornado's because we didn't have all the weather alerts that wake us up at midnight tonight
175.540000 181.640000 We didn't have all that my kids often asked me dad. What kind of cell phone did you have when you were growing up?
181.640000 183.560000 I had the one that was connected to the wall and
184.300000 187.980000 You had to dial it. You know, I'm saying it took a while to get out. There was no
187.980000 194.220000 Siri to tell you which direction to go if you were gonna go anywhere you had to break out a paper map and get there
194.220000 197.020000 Amen or somebody had to tell you how to get there
197.020000 205.760000 But there were tornadoes that were coming through and in the middle of that my dad just felt impressed by the Holy Spirit that he should pray
205.760000 209.060000 For his brother, which was my uncle and his family
209.060000 215.600000 So he gathered us around and said we need to pray for your uncle and we prayed not knowing that there was a F4
215.600000 221.380000 Tornado coming through marble County, South Carolina, Scotland County, North Carolina and
221.380000 229.340000 Robinson County, North Carolina would continue this tornado was a mile and a half wide and my uncle's house at right
229.340000 234.220000 You know quarter mile from some train tracks and that tornado went straight through
234.380000 241.000000 While we were praying and took train carts and just twisted them and threw them like they were little little
241.000000 249.380000 Play cars that was the power of that tornado and so several hours after that
249.380000 254.260000 We were able to locate my uncle and the whole family was well
254.260000 258.580000 But the house was moved off its foundation trees were gone
258.740000 265.100000 You know dumpsters were thrown a mile away. It was crazy. It looked like a bomb went off
265.100000 272.580000 And I believe his life and his family's life was saved because somebody heard God and began to pray
272.580000 280.300000 I mean, you know we need to step into the position when God instructs us and and we feel the leading of the Holy Spirit
280.300000 284.540000 to pray in moments and times like these and
285.220000 292.640000 And so during that outbreak of tornadoes there was 57 people that were killed over 1200 that were injured and
292.640000 302.880000 The next day I remember going out with my mom and dad and and my other siblings and we went out and toured some of the places where the tornado came through and
302.880000 312.900000 It amazed me that there were total shopping centers that were moved off their foundations, but the foundation was still intact
313.820000 323.680000 That foundation was secured and in our world there are many storms because storms reveal the foundation that you're building on
323.680000 329.020000 You're either going into a storm in a storm or coming out of a storm
329.020000 331.460000 You're stormed if you do and you're stormed if you don't
331.460000 338.520000 You're gonna go through a storm your marriage is gonna go through a storm your relational connections will go through a storm
338.520000 342.740000 America will go through more storms the world will go through more storms
342.740000 344.740000 But those storms
344.740000 348.980000 reveal the foundation that we have built our lives on
348.980000 355.500000 Such as the case in Matthew chapter 7 where Jesus tells the story of two guys who built their houses
355.500000 362.060000 One built their house on the rock and one built it on the sand and a storm came the same storm
362.060000 371.460000 The Bible says the wind began to blow the rain began to come down and the flood began to rise and the guy who built his house on the rock
371.860000 379.180000 His house was saved, but the other guy who built his house on the storm saying it was demolished
379.180000 381.660000 not only do
381.660000 386.940000 Storms reveal our foundation, but there's something else that happens to our foundation
386.940000 389.540000 lies
389.540000 394.180000 Begin to erode the foundation that we build our life on
394.180000 398.500000 Lies are significant very significant
399.460000 404.380000 We live in a world where truth is hard to find you people manipulate the truth
404.380000 406.500000 They hide the truth. They twist the truth
406.500000 412.500000 Romans once says and then last days people suppress the truth because of their own desires
412.500000 414.900000 So truth is very
414.900000 422.860000 Manipulated in our day, especially with the rise of AI and social media and and people only showing you the highlight of their lives
422.860000 427.020000 And they're they're not real and and people calling lies white lies
427.020000 432.720000 And we think there's difference in lies and reality if it's a lie. It's a lie whether it's white or black. Amen
432.720000 439.620000 You know a lie is a lie. So we as people need to be people of the truth
439.620000 443.180000 Jesus is
443.180000 446.940000 Truth in fact we often think truth as a principle. It's a concept
446.940000 451.700000 It's an idea, but in reality from the biblical standpoint truth as a person
451.700000 456.660000 Jesus said I am the way the truth and the life and he that believes in me though he were dead
456.660000 465.120000 Yes, yeah, you know, all this is truth that that comes into the arena when Jesus steps into arenas and steps into our lives truth
465.120000 466.300000 comes
466.300000 473.100000 But here's the thing about a lie every time you believe a lie you empower the liar
473.100000 480.420000 I'm going to say that one more time somebody went over your head every time you believe a lie
480.420000 483.020000 You empower the liar
483.020000 486.180000 Who's the liar save the devil?
486.660000 492.580000 Jesus said he is a liar in the book of John and he is the father of lies
492.580000 496.220000 That means every time he moves his lips. He's lying
496.220000 502.100000 There was a guy that I grew up with in our community his name was peanut
502.100000 511.140000 Peanut had told lies so much if you would go home and say have you all seen peanut? No, we haven't seen the liar
511.140000 515.620000 It became his character
516.180000 523.780000 And that's where that's the way the enemy is he is a liar and I don't like what the message Bible says about this that
523.780000 526.980000 Lying is Satan's native tongue
526.980000 534.660000 Doesn't mean Satan outright twist everything or are just outright lies
534.660000 540.180000 But he takes a little bit of the truth and he mixes lie in that to deceive people
541.860000 546.300000 We live in a world where politics has become so polarizing and
546.300000 554.660000 Oftentimes you hear this going on in our politics people telling lies knowing it is a lot
554.660000 561.940000 Now so nobody gets offended in here. I'm talking about all political parties
561.940000 565.300000 It happens in all political parties
565.300000 566.260000 I
566.260000 571.620000 Know you can whitewash your political party and you can sanctify them and you can make him pristine and
572.260000 577.220000 Let me tell you something the politicians open in his mouth. He's usually twist things on truth
577.220000 583.700000 Because you have to twist truth to get oftentimes in that world votes
583.700000 589.700000 But there was a guy in Nazi Germany
589.700000 594.100000 During the time of Adolf Hitler his name was Joseph
594.100000 597.060000 Joseph came up with this saying
597.860000 601.460000 If you tell a lie long enough it becomes the truth
601.460000 608.260000 If you tell a lie long enough it becomes the truth to repeat a lie
608.260000 617.140000 Begins to shape the perception of people and their awareness and if you tell a lie you just keep telling you keep putting it on media
617.140000 624.740000 You keep telling it it becomes the truth and because of that six million Jews were killed in the Nazi
625.220000 630.100000 Concentration camps of Germany because of Adolf Hitler. They just kept telling lies
630.100000 634.740000 They kept telling lies and kept telling lies and people began to believe that it was
634.740000 639.140000 the truth that they believed it
639.140000 649.460000 And there is a lie that has been told that that that just constantly is being told in our society and here's the lie because we're talking about
649.460000 652.180000 Covenant love
652.180000 653.860000 and marriage
653.860000 657.780000 That 50% of all marriages end in divorce
657.780000 661.460000 That's a myth
661.460000 666.740000 Nearly 70% of all first-time marriages make it
666.740000 670.180000 That's the truth
670.180000 677.300000 But here's the deal when we believe man. I have a 50/50 chance. Guess what that does we delay marriage
677.300000 681.380000 Because well man, I don't know man. I just don't I don't know if I want to get married
681.380000 686.180000 I see all these divorces they say 50% of all people they get married and send in a divorce
686.180000 692.100000 I don't have a 50/50 chance one out of two five out of 10 10 out of 20 20 out of 40 50 out of 100
692.100000 694.900000 I don't know if I like those odds and so I'm gonna delay marriage
694.900000 698.500000 So I'm gonna wait till I get 40 and I'm so old I can't have gifts
698.500000 705.540000 Think about that it also leads to this cohabitation
705.540000 708.900000 Well, I'm gonna kick the tires and try it out
710.980000 713.860000 And if it rides well, maybe we'll get hitched
713.860000 720.340000 So I'm gonna try this thing out for eight years at least or make it seven to be the tribulation period
720.340000 722.660000 Yeah, let's let's make it the tribulation period
722.660000 731.140000 And so we we we buy into this line that hurts what God designed
731.140000 740.020000 What God created see marriage is not a good idea. It's a God idea
740.340000 742.740000 That's what marriage is
742.740000 747.620000 Now
747.620000 750.660000 You begin to think about scripture
750.660000 758.740000 You can't understand the 66 books of the Bible written by 40 different authors or 1500 years
758.740000 762.100000 If you don't understand the first three chapters of Genesis
762.100000 767.700000 They are the foundation of the Bible
768.900000 776.180000 It's imperative that you understand the first three chapters that God is the creator in the beginning
776.180000 787.060000 God everything starts with God and God said let there be light light in the Bible metaphorically is revelation let there be revelation let there be a knowledge of me
787.060000 794.980000 Then he creates everything the stars he puts in the space and the song this says that he named each star
794.980000 798.100000 Wow
798.420000 805.380000 He creates vegetation and animals and waters and rivers and sea and then chapter 2 he
805.380000 810.580000 He takes some dust from the ground the Bible says he forms he sculptures
810.580000 816.580000 Something that looks like a man. We call him Adam the first man
816.580000 821.380000 The Bible says he formed man from the dust of the earth and breathe
821.380000 828.020000 Rua the breath of God into man and man became a living being
828.980000 831.780000 When Adam opened his eyes he saw his creator
831.780000 838.580000 Now after he created Adam he puts him in a house called the Garden of Eden
838.580000 842.580000 He didn't just put him in the house, but he gave him a job description
842.580000 848.740000 He said 10 to the garden work it. How many of God sets you in a place you got to work it if you don't work it
848.740000 854.180000 It won't work. Amen. You got to work it and then the Bible says in verse 18
854.340000 857.940000 No suitable helper was found for Adam
857.940000 862.820000 suitable helper that word helper is easier in the Hebrew
862.820000 867.220000 It actually means no rescuer
867.220000 870.980000 No partner no one to
870.980000 878.260000 Coexist and collaborate with it actually means and it refers to God as Savior
878.260000 884.260000 So what Adam didn't understand when God put him to sleep and he woke up and there was a
884.260000 888.820000 woman beside him he didn't really put this together that woman
888.820000 894.420000 Was prophetically the Savior because through her would come Jesus
894.420000 905.220000 God gives you a spouse a woman to compliment you and to build you up guys where you are weak
905.220000 908.980000 and most guys are real
908.980000 910.420000 weak
910.420000 912.260000 We have our weaknesses
912.260000 914.260000 We have our blind spots
914.260000 918.580000 So my wife helps me in the area where I am blind
918.580000 922.740000 But look let's go to Genesis chapter 2 verse 20
922.740000 928.580000 20 uh 24 and 25 it says this this is why a man leaves his father
928.580000 934.900000 And mother and is united to his wife now. I want you to underline this word right here leaves
934.900000 938.180000 leaves
938.180000 940.900000 leaves
940.900000 942.900000 This is why a man leaves
942.900000 949.620000 So the job of a parent is to raise kids that can leave
949.620000 956.340000 His father and mother what does that word mean to leave it means to leave physically
956.340000 964.820000 It means to leave emotionally you're no longer emotionally under the authority of your parents when you leave
965.140000 968.660000 To establish a whole new covenant
968.660000 975.700000 Your parents had a covenant now you're going to establish another covenant, but you've got to leave
975.700000 977.300000 Mommy, you got to let that boy go
977.300000 979.940000 Daddy, you got to let that girl go
979.940000 984.900000 Amen. That's good preaching and they become one flesh
984.900000 988.900000 Adam and his wife were both naked
991.300000 999.540000 in the bus naked and they felt no shame look here they felt no shame where did shame come from
999.540000 1002.020000 Shame came from sin it came from the fall
1002.020000 1006.820000 What did Jesus do on the cross he bore our shame on the cross
1006.820000 1013.380000 When Adam and Eve were naked and they sined they tried to hide their shame through religion
1013.380000 1016.100000 In the form of fig leaves
1016.100000 1022.740000 They built a a garment to cover themselves, but it wasn't enough and so God said no
1022.740000 1034.820000 I'm going to wrap some skin around you representing the shed blood of Jesus and Jesus was naked on the cross because he was buried the shame of our sin
1034.820000 1038.180000 That's why he went to the cross
1038.180000 1045.700000 Now here's a principle for biblical interpretation because I'm so tired of people misinterpreting the Bible
1046.260000 1048.260000 out of context
1048.260000 1050.260000 It's called the principle of first mention
1050.260000 1062.260000 anytime a word a phrase or a concept is mentioned in the Bible that's usually the way it's used throughout the rest of the Bible
1062.260000 1068.340000 So in Genesis chapter 2 verse 24 what does God do?
1068.340000 1072.020000 He gives us the institution of marriage
1073.460000 1076.660000 What is it? One man, one woman
1076.660000 1084.340000 That shouldn't be deep folks. I know in the world that we live in right now
1084.340000 1090.820000 We don't know if we don't know we're scared to say what marriage is we got politicians that won't say what marriage is
1090.820000 1095.140000 But marriage from a biblical standpoint for thousands of years
1095.140000 1100.500000 instituted by God was between a man and a woman now in our day
1100.980000 1108.420000 We have men marrying men and women trying to marry women and men marrying dogs and women marrying a pet and men marrying a eye
1108.420000 1113.060000 That's happening guys in America and the world
1113.060000 1123.540000 Why because anytime you take God out of an institution such as marriage it collapses people collapse people fail
1123.540000 1128.420000 People self-destruct why it's the suppression of truth
1128.580000 1135.540000 So if I was the enemy and I wanted human beings to self-impload to self-destruct I would
1135.540000 1142.500000 Target their truth and I would begin to manipulate and suppress the truth and the Bible says in Romans chapter 1
1142.500000 1146.900000 They are where they're at because they have suppressed the truth
1146.900000 1150.580000 I'm preaching good here
1150.580000 1152.980000 Now here
1152.980000 1154.420000 here
1154.420000 1157.940000 So if if if the truth is that marriage
1158.740000 1161.220000 Is between a man and a woman it's a covenant
1161.220000 1164.500000 For God
1164.500000 1167.540000 It's sealed before God
1167.540000 1172.660000 What is happening in our day of redefinition of marriage
1172.660000 1179.540000 Are people attacking marriage when they try to redefine it? No
1179.540000 1183.380000 They're attacking
1183.380000 1185.940000 God who created it
1186.020000 1188.020000 You
1188.020000 1194.660000 And if I can redefine marriage I can redefine God and make God non-binary
1194.660000 1206.580000 Oh, I'm preaching in here see we don't we don't think deep enough. We just go along to get along we don't think to the end
1206.580000 1213.060000 If I attack marriage I'm destroying the image of God
1214.420000 1223.860000 In marriage if I attack even abortion abortion is not an attack on children abortion is attack on the image of God in the fetus before it's ever born
1223.860000 1226.100000 That's what it is
1226.100000 1236.260000 That's what it is and that's not political folks get out of your political thinking and get into God's word and say what's going to define the way I think
1239.940000 1244.900000 So here's what I hear in our culture. Well, well, Jesus. Well, Jesus loves
1244.900000 1247.700000 Jesus is love. He is
1247.700000 1250.980000 He came as a lamb
1250.980000 1253.940000 But he's coming back as a lion
1253.940000 1262.020000 He came first as savior. He's coming back as righteous judge of all nations
1262.020000 1267.780000 Don't manipulate and manipulate Jesus and make him a sissy. He's not
1269.140000 1275.380000 He was a carpenter and when I say carpenter some of y'all think would he was like nailing wood no a carpenter in those days
1275.380000 1284.340000 Was actually a stone worker. He he handled stone. He was strong and he's coming back as a king of kings and the Lord of lords
1284.340000 1290.180000 And we need to be ready. We need to have our garments ready for the soon imminent return of Jesus Christ
1290.180000 1297.620000 So this is what people say. Well, Jesus is love and nowhere in the New Testament that Jesus talk about
1298.020000 1304.100000 Marriages only this or marriages only that and men couldn't marry men and women shouldn't marry come on
1304.100000 1307.540000 Let's read it
1307.540000 1310.420000 Let's read the Bible look at Matthew chapter 19
1310.420000 1319.140000 Matthew chapter 19 is this right here. Haven't you read now? This is Jesus talking to the religious crowd cypress
1319.140000 1321.620000 Haven't you read? He replied
1322.340000 1330.740000 That at the beginning the creator who God how did Jesus know this well? He knew the first five books of the Bible the pinnitude
1330.740000 1334.500000 It was written every good Jewish kid had to learn that and memorize it
1334.500000 1338.820000 But he knew it beyond that because he was with God in the beginning
1338.820000 1343.860000 When God breathed the life into Adam Jesus was there
1343.860000 1347.940000 We serve one God revealed in three persons
1348.820000 1353.140000 Look here that at the beginning the creator made male and female
1353.140000 1361.060000 And said for this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife and the two will become one flesh
1361.060000 1368.100000 So they are no longer two but one flesh therefore what God has joined together let no one
1368.100000 1373.460000 Separate a man don't let government separate it don't let public opinion separated
1373.460000 1377.460000 Don't let your feelings separate it. Don't let people around you separate it
1377.620000 1384.580000 Don't let angry people around you separated what God has joined together let no man separate
1384.580000 1390.820000 What was Jesus doing? He was practicing correct biblical interpretation
1390.820000 1403.860000 He goes all the way back to Genesis chapter 2 verses 23 24 and 25 and brings all of humanity up to date on God's original intention for mankind in the context of marriage
1405.140000 1407.140000 Well, that's good preaching
1407.140000 1410.980000 Don't send me no hate mail. I don't care
1410.980000 1416.660000 So here's the lies
1416.660000 1419.140000 We'll give you four lies two today two next week
1419.140000 1427.140000 Here's the lie in marriage that that happens lie number one in marriage. I can change him or her
1427.140000 1430.180000 Yeah, yeah
1430.180000 1432.580000 Right
1433.300000 1435.300000 Come talk to me when that happens
1435.300000 1442.580000 Well some people say it'd be a cold day in Hades hell for that
1442.580000 1445.540000 You cannot change
1445.540000 1448.500000 Your marriage
1448.500000 1450.580000 Partner your husband or your wife
1450.580000 1452.980000 impossible
1452.980000 1455.220000 In fact God never designed it that way
1455.220000 1460.900000 If you even look at original intention when God created Adam and he put him to sleep
1461.060000 1464.340000 He didn't pull Eve out of his head so he could rule over Eve
1464.340000 1467.700000 He didn't pull Eve out of Adam's foot so he could rule over her
1467.700000 1471.540000 He pulled Eve out of his side for partnership and
1471.540000 1477.700000 Collaboring in the union of grace that God set them in so it's not domination
1477.700000 1482.900000 It's not the man trying to manipulate the wife and control her or the wife trying to control the man
1482.900000 1489.220000 No, it's them walking in partnerships. I can't change my wife. She can't change me. She married who she married
1489.940000 1495.860000 I'm six three tall darken handsome, but hey she got what she got you know I'm saying
1495.860000 1502.020000 I can't change her
1502.020000 1506.580000 You'll spend all your energy trying to change people and that is
1506.580000 1516.500000 Impossible it's impossible to do you you you'll get tired if you want a better marriage start with a better you
1518.900000 1525.700000 Start with hey God do something in me transform my life change my mind change my attitude
1525.700000 1531.780000 And when God changes your mind and your attitude he changes your behavior don't start with behavior start with
1531.780000 1536.180000 Your mind as a man thinks in his heart. So is he
1536.180000 1540.980000 You start with the thinking of the mind
1540.980000 1545.220000 See men marry women not wanting them to change
1545.220000 1548.580000 Women marry men wanting them to change
1549.140000 1551.640000 Inevitably both get disappointed
1551.640000 1556.260000 Both get disappointed
1556.260000 1560.260000 Because it's not my job to change my wife. It's not her job to change me
1560.260000 1563.300000 It's our job to pray
1563.300000 1571.860000 I got to pray lord. I mean this marriage you put me here. There's a reason we got married and you we understand this that you know that that
1571.860000 1574.340000 Love is blind, but marriage is a
1574.820000 1578.180000 Eye opener, you know, man. It just opens your eyes, and man
1578.180000 1583.140000 You didn't know that guy through underwear everywhere in the house. You know, I'm saying you won't pick up behind
1583.140000 1586.820000 Themself won't wash a dish and you get so mad you're trying to change her now
1586.820000 1591.140000 That's when you get on your knees and pray, you know, I'm saying and and you marry a lady
1591.140000 1595.060000 You didn't know man. She spend all your money, but you get on your knees and pray man
1595.060000 1601.940000 You get down there and pray and God begins to transform your life because James five says this the
1602.020000 1608.580000 Sexual fervent prayer of a righteous man or woman can accomplish much so when I pray here's a deal about prayer
1608.580000 1610.980000 Prayer can become manipulation
1610.980000 1618.580000 But you don't let it become manipulation. You pray an earnest prayer a good prayer for your spouse
1618.580000 1621.620000 You don't try to control them demonically through prayer
1621.620000 1628.420000 You just pray a righteous come on a righteous prayer out of a righteous person doesn't manipulate
1628.580000 1635.140000 They just get that person just you're giving in the God you say God. I can't do this and while you're praying for your spouse
1635.140000 1640.100000 This is what happens God begins to change your perception of who they are
1640.100000 1642.660000 They
1642.660000 1647.300000 There's things in your spouse that will never change because it's built into their DNA
1647.300000 1653.380000 God designed them that way there are motivational gifts God gave them according to Romans chapter 12
1653.380000 1656.500000 You can't change it God designed them that way
1656.660000 1662.820000 So God begins to change your perception. You begin to say oh, I know why God gave me that man or that woman
1662.820000 1667.620000 She's got this quality and I'm weak in that area and she becomes my rescue
1667.620000 1669.620000 She becomes my savior in the air
1669.620000 1677.220000 I used to be a man that spent all the money that I had but now I got a wife who's a savior and he can budget and who can save money
1677.220000 1681.380000 And now she's helping me in my weakness. So I don't spend everything come on somebody
1681.380000 1686.500000 You know what I'm saying? There is a give and take in relationship
1686.820000 1688.820000 Yes
1688.820000 1690.820000 Why do we try to change each other
1690.820000 1693.620000 Prayer is to keep lie number two
1693.620000 1700.020000 Here it is lie number two a good marriage is always
1700.020000 1703.220000 50 50
1703.220000 1707.460000 So I say that a lie there
1707.460000 1710.980000 You ain't lying
1710.980000 1712.980000 That is a lie
1713.620000 1718.100000 Some people say I want you to meet my better half what you do chop her legs off
1718.100000 1722.020000 And like no
1722.020000 1725.620000 You don't have a better half you have a better hold don't marry a better half
1725.620000 1729.220000 That's all you're gonna get if you marry a better half you're gonna get half
1729.220000 1735.940000 I want to marry a 100% person you know I'm saying I want to marry somebody that's together. Hey man
1735.940000 1742.180000 And so we say well you get 50% and I'll get 50% the problem with that is
1742.740000 1747.220000 The problem with just giving 50% is this right here is that you begin to keep score
1747.220000 1753.140000 Well, I watched the dishes yesterday
1753.140000 1756.420000 It's your turn
1756.420000 1760.100000 Mmm, I cleaned the toilet now it's your turn
1760.100000 1766.340000 I always clean this house well I always clean outside
1766.340000 1771.620000 If you clean inside the car I'll clean the outside
1772.180000 1776.340000 If you take the trash out today I'll take it out tomorrow and so we have these
1776.340000 1782.740000 Fights because we think marriage is 50 50 how many you know and Jesus didn't love you that way
1782.740000 1784.580000 And he doesn't love you that way
1784.580000 1787.380000 Jesus was willing to give his whole life
1787.380000 1792.580000 100% for your salvation on the cross. He was willing to lay his life down
1792.580000 1794.740000 For you
1794.740000 1797.700000 What if in our relationships we gave 100%
1799.300000 1803.860000 Wow, how would it change our marriages now somebody has to start
1803.860000 1812.100000 Somebody has to start with the the 100% and you say well if I if I give the 100% and they don't come along you keep doing it
1812.100000 1819.460000 You keep doing it if not you're just doing it to get them to respond
1819.460000 1823.140000 You do it because it's the character of God to do so
1823.140000 1827.940000 Whether you're a wife or a husband you just do it because that's the character of Jesus
1828.260000 1836.020000 That's where men have to lead in the homes we have to give 100% how did Jesus give 100% he laid his life down
1836.020000 1841.220000 How many you know if you're a father in this place you have to lay your life down for your wife
1841.220000 1848.740000 You have to lay your wife life down for your children you have to put them first that means I might not can buy some golf clubs
1848.740000 1856.740000 Because my wife need some new shoes or my kids need some new clothes or I've got to buy something for their schools
1856.980000 1861.700000 I have to be willing to come on practice delayed gratification in my life
1861.700000 1868.420000 Because I'm committed to the welfare of my wife because I'm a hundred percent in I'm committed to the welfare of my children
1868.420000 1871.940000 I'm a hundred percent in so there might be some things I really want
1871.940000 1874.900000 That I have to put off
1874.900000 1877.940000 I've been wanting a new boat for 31 years
1877.940000 1882.340000 I still ain't got this thinking boat
1884.740000 1890.420000 But I can see the promised land. I'm like Dr. Martin Luther King. I see the promised land folks
1890.420000 1896.660000 I have one more daughter about to be out of school and married praise the Lord all of them be married
1896.660000 1898.500000 Hallelujah
1898.500000 1900.500000 Praise God
1900.500000 1908.580000 But I have to practice come on. This is what we do if we don't understand marriage and and we can think it's 50 50
1908.580000 1913.220000 We go out and we buy the new boat in the wrong time and and it destroys our marriage
1914.180000 1919.700000 And when we're out on the boat we can enjoy it because we know the wives all jacked up and the kids are lacking and we feel
1919.700000 1924.580000 We feel you know shame and we feel guilt over in the boat which is beautiful man
1924.580000 1932.500000 Beautiful boat, but I can't even feel at peace in that boat because I know it's not the right timing for the boat
1932.500000 1937.780000 Amen
1937.780000 1943.460000 That's why most guys who are married only have two pair of pants and five t-shirts
1944.180000 1947.220000 They're sacrificing for their kids, man
1947.220000 1956.420000 They're giving it they're giving it you know, they're not wearing 150 dollars tennis shoes. They're wearing the 15 dollar ones, man
1956.420000 1962.980000 They're just giving it they're giving it at all, but most men like five t-shirts and two pair of jeans
1962.980000 1968.180000 I'm I'm not kind of god. I don't need a bunch of clothes my or fact 90% of the clothes in my closet. I do not wear
1968.180000 1971.220000 And I keep giving them away
1971.220000 1974.500000 Somehow they just keep reappearing. I don't know how that happens
1974.500000 1977.940000 But there has to be a sacrifice
1977.940000 1985.140000 Won't you think about this Ephesians 5 1 through 2 says this the imitators of God. What does that mean? The imitators in the family
1985.140000 1994.500000 How did God love us? He gave his life as be love of children and walk in love as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us
1994.500000 2000.020000 A fragrant offering and sacrifice to God
2000.260000 2003.060000 That's how he loved
2003.060000 2007.700000 He gave himself up for who us
2007.700000 2016.180000 What does 100% look like me giving 100% up for my wife my wife giving 100% up for me
2016.180000 2020.420000 But even as she doesn't do it. I'm gonna still do it
2020.420000 2025.620000 Look here
2025.620000 2031.060000 Here's a big one. I'm gonna drop a bomb Ephesians 5 25 husbands
2031.060000 2034.260000 Love your wives
2034.260000 2042.580000 As Christ loved the church and gave himself up for who her
2042.580000 2047.220000 I gotta be willing to lay my life down
2047.220000 2052.340000 My kids need to see that
2052.340000 2055.540000 God wants me to do that
2056.260000 2059.460000 Pasta you just don't know man. I need you come on
2059.460000 2065.380000 What are you saying? I'm not saying you can never have any good things. That's believe me. That's not what I'm saying
2065.380000 2071.940000 But what I am saying if you go out and buy a 2026 toyota tundra
2071.940000 2076.260000 Macked out take it down to pungo off road jack it up 40 inches
2076.260000 2080.180000 Big tires some dice hanging in the on the mirror
2080.180000 2085.380000 And you drive around and your kids are lacking. You're out of order
2085.780000 2087.780000 You're out of order
2087.780000 2091.540000 And anytime you're out of order, there is no peace
2091.540000 2094.980000 That doesn't mean you can never get a new truck
2094.980000 2098.180000 That just means there's order to it
2098.180000 2103.540000 I'm not gonna let my wife and my kids go lacking because I desire something
2103.540000 2106.340000 And want something that bad
2106.340000 2111.220000 I like to have a new boat and one day we'll have one by faith
2111.220000 2113.700000 Amen
2113.700000 2115.700000 Soon and very soon
2115.700000 2121.860000 Remember that will sound soon and very soon. We are going to see the king
2121.860000 2127.460000 But I got to put it in the right order. Amen
2127.460000 2133.780000 Got to put it in the right order. Here's an equation. I want you to write down half-hearted effort
2133.780000 2137.060000 This is from Craig Grosjeel. It's not original from me
2137.060000 2140.820000 Half-hearted effort plus half-hearted commitment
2141.460000 2143.460000 Equals whole-hearted disappointment
2143.460000 2150.420000 Half-hearted effort half-hearted commitment equals whole-hearted
2150.420000 2153.060000 Disappointed
2153.060000 2158.340000 Again, what would it look like if I totally
2158.340000 2161.460000 Gave 100%
2161.460000 2163.780000 I'd no longer keep score
2163.780000 2170.100000 Love according to 1 Corinthians 13 keeps no records of wrong. So I'm not gonna keep score
2170.900000 2173.940000 I'm just gonna give a hundred percent. I'm gonna give a hundred percent
2173.940000 2177.060000 I'll tell you if you're a young family in here
2177.060000 2184.580000 One of the best things you can do is begin to live within your means and I know I know it can be tight
2184.580000 2189.380000 I understand I raised four kids started a church. I wasn't poor
2189.380000 2193.380000 We were one level under poor. It's called Po
2196.820000 2203.300000 I've been poor. I understand what it is to have to ask God to bring some milk to my house for my kids
2203.300000 2206.980000 I understand what it is
2206.980000 2213.460000 I understand how much money but if you can begin to somehow live within your means we all for financial peace classes
2213.460000 2219.460000 We all for classes on finances. You got to learn to budget so you can live within your means
2219.460000 2225.700000 Doesn't mean you can never have what you feel like you desire maybe a new truck one day or a new house
2226.100000 2231.540000 But if you allow the God of heaven to prosper you it will come without sorrow
2231.540000 2239.060000 See when I try to prosper myself it creates sorrow and conflict in my family
2239.060000 2243.300000 I want you to stand
2243.300000 2252.580000 There has to be delayed gratification
2252.580000 2255.780000 We have to give 50-50
2256.340000 2261.220000 We have to I meant we have to give a hundred not 50-50 we have to commit to it
2261.220000 2270.100000 And there has to be some delayed gratification. You know you have to say is this right is should I is this the right time?
2270.100000 2275.460000 I mean every house tangent. I've ever bought we own three houses in this area. We rent it like four
2275.460000 2279.860000 But we knew hey can we afford this at this time or not
2279.860000 2282.820000 We had to make those decisions
2283.860000 2288.020000 I remember the crash of 07 and 08 people lost their shirts
2288.020000 2292.660000 Because bankers were giving them money that they couldn't pay back
2292.660000 2299.060000 I had bankers trying to give me six hundred thousand dollars and I knew what I made. I said you out of your mind
2299.060000 2304.020000 You out of your mind. I know what I can afford. I know my finances
2304.020000 2306.820000 So we bought a house that we could
2306.820000 2309.780000 We could afford
2309.780000 2312.340000 My wife since we've been married always wanted to pull
2312.820000 2318.500000 And I'm glad to give it to her and I said baby. I know you want to pull one day. I'm gonna give it to you
2318.500000 2323.140000 But having you know a pool in the wrong place in life
2323.140000 2327.140000 Can set you back even if you think you're moving forward
2327.140000 2332.180000 Amen red hearts from funds amen
2332.180000 2339.460000 But we kept putting it off we kept putting it off we kept putting it off
2341.860000 2345.860000 But this year we got a pool after 31 years
2345.860000 2348.580000 After 31 years
2348.580000 2351.380000 But guess what can I tell you something about that pool
2351.380000 2354.740000 There's no
2354.740000 2356.500000 There there's no
2356.500000 2362.260000 Uptightness in our family. Why because it's in the right time. It's the right approach. It's the right thing to do
2362.260000 2366.820000 My kids will not be able to draw but those grandkids amen
2367.780000 2370.980000 And kids they might do it a little bit but that's great. We did it for the grandkids. Amen
2370.980000 2374.660000 Praise the Lord if I knew grandkids were that good I'd have them first
2374.660000 2383.300000 But it's all in the right time. I mean a thing. God wants to bless us. He really does
2383.300000 2388.420000 But he wants us to use wisdom at the same time the wisdom of God
2388.420000 2390.900000 We must learn to identify the lies
2390.900000 2393.940000 That we believe and we must replace them with the truth
2395.780000 2399.940000 If they lie can destroy your marriage then truth can transform your marriage
2399.940000 2406.020000 Any relationship if you're single come on if if you're single in here
2406.020000 2410.820000 Man, God's got a spouse for you. If you've been through a divorce, God has restoration
2410.820000 2414.100000 And another opportunity for you
2414.100000 2417.940000 If you're a cohabitating you're living together
2417.940000 2420.980000 Man, you're dishonoring God get married
2422.740000 2425.300000 That's as straight as I can't put a no simpler than that
2425.300000 2428.580000 You're breaking you're breaking the covenant of God
2428.580000 2437.060000 And if you really study people who lived together before they get married it's more detrimental to their future marriage
2437.060000 2446.020000 Because in that situation the woman has felt violated even if she never voices it
2446.020000 2451.780000 Proven just go you don't have to read the Bible just go out there study it
2452.180000 2453.780000 It's true
2453.780000 2460.180000 That's power is though. I just thank you chief giving us an opportunity to come hear your word
2460.180000 2467.620000 Your word is truth and your word we have hidden our hearts that we might not sin against you
2467.620000 2473.380000 God we know truth is more than a principle. It's a person the person of Jesus
2473.380000 2476.340000 Who gave his life for us