"Opened Dawes" Podcast Ep 7: Look at the Snow not the Trees

Show Notes

This is the podcast of  “Opened Dawes” Live, which runs weekly as a live video show on YouTube, Facebook, and LinkedIn at 11 am on Tuesday mornings so that we can throw open the doors and welcome you in for a relaxed sharing of information, tips, thoughts, and answering any questions about public speaking and presentation/communication skills you may have.

So, make sure you set the reminders for the shows on Facebook or YouTube (links below) as they are scheduled online and get involved.  The stream is designed to be interactive, with comments/questions able to be shown and attributed on screen.

This week’s show looks at the impact of focusing too much on what can go wrong, or the potential obstacles (the trees), rather than the things that need to be done and what can be achieved (the snow and the route through the trees).
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This show can be watched live (and previous shows recorded) from the following locations:
Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/OpenDawesTraining/live

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www.youtube.com/channel/UCnwlPiWylgEDLrwemI8ZZjw (or search YouTube for Open Dawes Training and click subscribe to be notified)

Thanks to:
www.opendawestraining.co.uk
www.chrisdawescomms.co.uk
www.opendawestraining.co.uk/connect

What is "Opened Dawes" Podcast?

Open Dawes Training is a public speaking, presentation and communication skills coaching company, with the key motivation of the company being to help people open doors that they may not even know exist yet, with increased confidence, willingness, and skills to present and speak in front of/with others. The podcast is taken from the live weekly "Opened Dawes" Live video show, where founder Chris Dawes dives into the key areas that make the difference with "public speaking", whether that is for those who are too nervous to do it or those who want to "up their game", whether that is for presentations, presence and participation in meetings, delivery of training, sales pitches, demonstrations, or even just communication with others in the best possible way. Chris Dawes: "My key ethos when I formed the business is that we are not, and should not be trying to create the mythical blueprint of the "perfect presenter", but unlocking each person's own personality, growing their confidence, helping them to be in control, organised, and of a quality that will make them become asked to do it more often, and no hesitation in their acceptance to do so. Apparently, public speaking is a soft skill, but it is a soft skill that gives your core skills a voice! Everyone owes it to themselves, and it is priceless to all of us that get to listen to them share their knowledge, experiences, passions, enthusiasm, and opinions. It gets them, their organisation, and their product/service recognised and appreciated, and helps us to grow and become more empowered from what they have to share."

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is actually the audio taken from
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a blend of the two, all designed
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presence or communication skills

in meetings, or just having
those difficult conversations

effectively. public speaking is
a soft skill that gives your

core skills of voice and can
open doors that you may not even

know exist yet. But for now,
let's dive into this episode of

Opened Dawes Live.

Hello, welcome to Episode Seven
of Opened Dawes Live. Thank you

very much for joining me. And
that includes I love it my

cousin's watching as well,
hello, my little boy. Good to

see you at. And yes, it's if you
didn't read the details, you

might be a bit confused by this
one because the title is look at

the snow, not the trees. No idea
what that's got to do with

public speaking Have you if you
haven't read the details, but

there is a reason for it. It's
one of the became public

speakers, I can't remember
exactly which one it was now

that that made a comment that
you need to if you're a skier is

going through the trees, and
they're going at a rate and not

skiing through them. I think
officially you're advised not to

but let's just go with it for a
minute. The worst thing you can

do is go I've got to avoid the
trees, I've got to avoid the

trees, I've got to avoid the
trees because all you will see

is the trees. You just become
actually obsessed. Like if I

said go and sit stand in that
corner. And don't think about

pink elephants. Or you can going
to think about is those pink

elephants, you won't be able to
get them out of your mind.

That's just the nature of Avast,
really, I think. Whereas what

the true scares are doing is
they're looking at the snow,

they're looking at the snow,
they're finding the root,

they're looking for the root
through. So looking for the

root, not the obstacles. And
it's the same that really

applies with this is that we can
get too bogged down with

obsessing about what could go
wrong. If we've got a

presentation coming up. If I'm
delivering a training course, if

if you are being asked to be
part of a meeting, whether it's

a sales meeting, whether it's an
internal meeting, whether you

are high up in the hierarchy,
and you've got to have a meeting

or present with a thorny subject
with with your people

potentially, you know, a whole
host of things that can have an

impact on it. It's all too easy
to just get obsessed with what

could go wrong, then that could
happen. This could happen, that

might not happen. They could
think this they could say that.

And you get too obsessed with
that. Now, there's there's a few

reasons why it doesn't work in
my in my experience is that

point one. It's a huge kicker
with regards to nerves, you

know, it will just create such a
horrible cacophony of of nerves,

negative adrenalin, we'll be
thinking all about the negative

possibilities long before they
even happen. I mean, every time

we cross the road, do we go, I'm
going to get run over. You are

mindful, you know we did was it
last week we did about

preparation for the unexpected.

And how you try to sort of put
the groundwork in place to a

minimize the chance and be cover
yourself in case it does happen

so that you can get out of it.

But it doesn't mean you then
obsessed and every thought is

about it. Because that's all you
think about. And the other point

being is that if you think too
much about that, you are not

leaving enough room for you to
actually think about write, what

have I got to say? Why have I
got to say it? How do I want to

say it? What effect do I want to
leave my audience with? So

you've got to leave the bulk of
your thought process for the

snow and the root. That's what
you have to do. Now, one of the

key things I love doing this one
in my training because people go

what one of the key things that
I say is stop being

narcissistic. Well, it sounds a
bit brutal, doesn't it? But it's

not as brutal as it's meant,
because we always think about

what if it is going to go wrong
for me? What if they don't like

me? What if? What if, what if,
and it's all about, you know

what effect it will have on us
and how we will be portrayed.

But the critical thing for me is
actually flip it on its head,

what do I want my audience to
get out of this? What do I need

them to learn to hear to feel to
want to do next. And the more we

focus on that. And again, it's
critical for that route through

rather than the actual trees
that are there. The more we're

able to focus, the more we're
infused, we're excited, I've got

this opportunity to pass this
information on to them, the more

focused the actual content
that's going to be shared with

them. And the way it's going to
be shared. Next week show for

example is going to be what's
your tone, because it's also

about how you're going to say
what you want to say. And if we

think about what do I want my
audience to get from this.

That's what the focus will be
rather than narcissistically

thinking what's going to go
wrong. Think about them. It

could be things like past
failures. And I always say

failures because I tell you now,
it won't be as big a deal for

them as it is for you. It's just
the nature of the beast, you

know it, you for you, it just
went horribly, horribly wrong

for them. They were sat in
another presentation another

meeting another training course
and they got this information,

you know, it's not Britain's Got
Talent, where they're judging

you they're trying to get this
are great, okay, I learned all

of this information. That past
failure element is you got to

put it to bed learn. One of the
other shows I'm going to do at

some point about is to learn
rather than obsess. Learn from

it. Okay, what what wasn't I
happy with what didn't go as I

would like to find you know,
what maybe that goes is one of

the things you last week show of
the preparation for the

unexpected just to cover
yourself. Maybe it goes into

that. But the other one is that
we just grow, we just get better

every presentation, every
training course I deliver, every

element is going to be a little
bit different anyway. And so

you've now picked it up. In
fact, I I'm sure it will be

another show. But I've always
had this thing that there's

always three variations of your
presentation, the one you intend

to give, the one you give, and
the one you wish you'd given. So

we've got all our plans, this is
what's going to happen.

Something happens within it,
some interaction happens, you

remember something else, you add
something else, you forget

something, and we end up with
the one that's given. And then

afterwards, we go, Ah, I could
have said this, I should have

said that. We're all hilarious.

After the moment, for example,
we will come up with the best

jokes after the moments gone. So
just except there's always going

to be those three. And in fact,
that becomes the one you intend

to give next time. So don't
worry about there being past

failures is that you kind of go
right you know what, no problem,

I'm going to do this preparation
for next time, I'm going to have

this guide in front of me in
case I need to refer to it, I am

going to have an extra cable in
my bag, whatever it is, it

should not then make you obsess
about it. When you go into the

next one. Just relax. It's the
route that you're looking for.

What do I want my audience to
get out of this? And I say

audience, it still applies if
it's just in a meeting the other

people around the meeting table
or in the meeting room. That's

your audience at that moment. If
you're worried about things like

forgetting your scripts, you're
going to have your bullet points

there. You're worried about it.

But what if I'm going to be
wrong? What if I'm

underprepared? Well, these are
things that you actually don't

think about are that could go
wrong, that could go wrong,

fleetingly go, what if I'm
wrong, right? Let's make sure

that my research is up to date.

What if I don't prepare enough?

will prepare enough? What if I
forget my script, we'll just

have bullet points down in front
of you so that you can refer to

them. So you're gonna make sure
it's also about not obsessing

about something that could or
couldn't happen, but

understanding right, what will I
need to do to adapt? You know,

I, we have examples like if if
there's more people than you

expected, or too few people
compared to what you expected?

It's no problem. Don't Don't
think about the trees. That is

those obstacles that suddenly
go, oh, there's more, there's

less. What do I need to do?

Right? I'm going to adapt,
right? I'm suddenly going to get

rid of a load of the chairs and
have chairs up closer to me, and

I'm going to deliver it a bit
more intimately. Okay, there's

more, right? You know, what we
either need more chairs in, or

it's standing room only at the
back, and we'll make sure that I

have got the stage setup, right.

Happy Days. All I've done is
I've adapted I haven't spent

time obsessing about but what
could go wrong? Stop looking at

the trees, think of the route
through

and it's what's going to make
the difference. What another key

one is the fact that there's
hierarchy, there's bosses in the

room, there's examiners, there's
whatever it could be that this

hierarchy that we're in a room
and you suddenly start going

trees, trees, trees, I'm gonna
hit the trees. They could fire

me they could hate me and lose
all chance or for whatever I

mean, Crikey, you could think
anything if we allowed ourselves

and as humans, I think we
normally do Don't wait. But what

about the fact that you could go
fan tastic my route here is that

I've got the opportunity to
stand up, be me, share my

knowledge, my experiences, my
infusion, enthusiasm, my

passion, my motivation, my
visions, to my the hierarchy, as

well as my peers. What a great
opportunity. When else would I

have this opportunity, those
bosses are going to sit down,

stay quiet and listen to what I
have to say. I'm not worried

about what they think what will
be will be. I can't change that

if I am just going to be myself.

share that information with
them. enthusiasm that I have for

it, they're gonna know that
you're human. So they're not

suddenly expecting you to be
this absolutely perfect robot.

To be honest, a lot of them will
also kind of go, it's gonna be a

bit daunting for them. I know
with me being here, because I'm

their boss or whatever. They're
going to give you grace. But

just think about the route and
that route in that that instance

is the opportunity for them to
hear you. So it's a distinct

mind change of how you need to
see it. And it will enable you

to have clarity of thought,
clarity of delivery, it will

enable you to enjoy it a whole
lot more and therefore probably

achieve an awful lot more as
well. It's good to take a quick

drink as well. I did it
deliberately at coffee time. So

hopefully you haven't coffee,
please feel free to put comments

or questions as well, by the
way, any experiences, you've had

yourself any things that it
makes you think and wonder if I

can help, I'd be delighted to
focus on being new, and the

information you're going to
share. People will actually be

impressed if something does
happen to go awry. And there's

no point second guessing we have
no idea what that could be

couldn't be whatever. But the
idea that you just calmly

resolve attempt to resolve
whatever may have happened,

rather than flapping and
obsessing and making a bigger

deal of it. If you just calmly
kind of go, right, that's

happened two seconds, try to
resolve it. If you can't resolve

it, you then adapt and do it
without whatever, whatever has

gone wrong, or whatever example
it could be, people will

actually be more impressed by
that. So again, we'll obsess Oh,

but what if this goes wrong? No
problem, I'm going to relax, I'm

going to keep smiling, I'm going
to sort of involve them in the

experience. And I'm going to
calmly attempt to resolve the

issue. Or I'm going to adapt and
do it without whatever the issue

was with. They're going to be
impressed by that. They're going

to have empathy for you. They're
humans that are probably glad

that is you rather than them
doing this. So they're going to

have empathy, and they're going
to go, Wow, okay, they really

dealt with that impressively
Didn't they, it was no big

drama. And we still sat here,
they're there for a reason.

Remember, they're there to hear
your presentation to be trained

by you to, to be part of that
meeting for a reason. And so in

all reality, all they're
interested in is that

information is not really you.

It's the information that you're
about to share. Now, we know

that you're hoping that it could
lead to sales, it could lead to

two promotions, it could lead to
more opportunities, it could,

who knows. And that's the whole
point, opening doors that we

don't know exist yet. There is
that, but that's kind of the

secondary bit your focus is on,
I'm sharing this information

with those that are here
listening to me. So that's all

they care about. So if you were
able to instead of obsessing

before you get there about what
could go wrong, and instead of

making a drama out of what maybe
has gone wrong, you know, it

could be more wrong for you than
it is for them. But you've just

calmly acknowledged it, tried to
remedy remedy it. If you

haven't, you've then just gone,
I'm going to adapt, I'm going to

do without
that means that we've got a new

mindset that's going to make us
feel a lot more relaxed. And

you've also made the delivery
that much slicker, that much

more inclusive, that much more
succinct, and that much more

informative. So try to think,
look at the snow, look at the

route, look at the goal, rather
than the obstacles, the trees

that you might hit. As soon as
you start looking at them,

you're gonna hit them. That's
the big problem. So that was

this week's session. I hope it
was it was useful. It's all

about trying to increase your
willingness, your confidence and

your skills to to speak up, be
the one that says Yes, I will.

Or a volunteer. And and let your
voice be heard. Let your

knowledge be heard. Let your
experiences your passion, your

enthusiasm, your potential of
either you, your organization,

your products, your services, it
doesn't matter what it is. It's

about sharing it with other
people and open those doors. I

have the same myself thinking
through this whether it's this

show, in fact, by the way, I
definitely have it when I'm

doing these shows. Was it last
week or the week before? I think

it was actually the week before
I realized that I'd sheduled

this for 11pm instead of 11am.

And I didn't realize this until
I was there. Why is it not

counting down? I've got less
than 10 minutes to go. And I

suddenly realized, oh my gosh,
it's 11pm. And this software

doesn't. The broadcast Studio
software use doesn't allow me

once it's within that window. I
can't just change it and

suddenly go live In less than 10
minutes, 15 minutes on LinkedIn.

I can in fact, you can't even
change it on LinkedIn. So I had

to go right, what am I going to
do? Right? I'm going to make

this 1115. I'm going to shedule
it, I'm going to ditch the

LinkedIn one altogether, because
I just can't do that one. And

I'm going to announce policies
technically technical issue,

it's 1115 instead of 11am. I
then washed it off, got

everything ready. And off I
went. And I went and did the

show. It was not obsessing about
the whole thing. Whether I'm

giving seminars, guest slots on
other people's shows, whatever

it might be. It's, you know, it
is about making sure that we

think all those those bits and
pieces so that was this week's

show, please do go and have a
look. And let me put it back up

again, as well in terms of the
banner, and Open Dawes

training.co.uk, forward slash
Connect. There's multiple ways

that you can connect with us
here at Open, Dawes Training,

whether that is the social media
channels and the YouTube channel

where we try to put up lots of
material that can be helpful for

you, the blog posts as well. You
know, lots of tips and advice,

free downloads as well on in
particular nerves, and ways to

open up your presentation, as
well as both the blended online

and face to face training, or a
face to face training. Go and

have a look. There's multiple
ways you can connect with us.

I'll be back next week. And as I
say, the plan at the moment is

that it's what's your tone, the
way that you say the impact the

difference the way you say
something can have as well as

what you actually say. So, thank
you very much for myself, Chris

Dawes Open Dawes Training. It
has been a pleasure. I'll see

you next week.

Thank you for listening to
Opened Dawes Live. I hope you

enjoyed it and it was useful.

Remember, go to Open Dawes
training.co.uk forward slash

Connect, to find out more about
how you can interact with us and

how we can help you