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Deeper in the Drukhari-infested ruins, the crew negotiates an uneasy truce with a Craftworld Eldar sniper and wades into a xenos torture chamber. Roos has a grenade. The Drukhari have a Webway gate. The solution to every problem is the same -- pull the pin and pray to the Emperor it lands where you aimed.
Website: https://www.narrativedeclaration.com
System: WH40K Wrath & Glory
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What is Wrath & Glory | Narrative Declaration?
An Ogryn, Rogue Trader, Aeldari, and an Inquisitor walk into a Warhammer 40,000 TTRPG campaign, and it’s everything you expect it to be! Listen in to Narrative Declaration’s run of WH40K: Wrath & Glory! You’ll laugh, cry, and scream “heresy!” as our party journeys through the “Litanies of the Lost” adventures.
We're going to talk to H.R. after this.
Try to keep one of them alive, Roosh.
You can break their legs, that's fine.
God's forsaken system.
All right, fine. We'll go kill the elves.
All right, everyone.
Who's ready to play some Wrath in Glory?
My skin! My skin!
Eat his skin. Eat him. Eat his skin.
I'm peeling off his skin. I'm peeling off his skin right now.
Eat his skin right now.
Even now, the evil seed of what you've done germinates within you.
Germa?
Germa!
Germa starts growing out of us.
Ah!
Ah, he's germanafesting! The iconic germanafestation move!
What germa grows out of you?
Do you get TF2-era germa or dollhouse-premier germa?
I think it depends on how many toxins you have in your body.
Like, heavy metals, you're going to get dollhouse.
But if you have more microplastics than metals, you're going to get TF2 germa.
I got bit by germa, so for me, it's like a slow burn transformation into big booty mirror germa.
Hey, can you get me in contact with that germa?
Anyway, welcome everybody to Wrath in Glory.
Of course, we're here joined by Hokey.
That's me!
And Odoroshi.
Oh, that's me!
And Speaker D.
It is me as well. That is me, for now.
Along with our game master, On Call GM.
Who?
Exactly.
And of course, I am your host this evening. I'm Zoran the Bear.
Welcome, everyone, to another episode of Wrath in Glory by note of declaration.
Last time we left off, we were writing our illustrious battle tractor, in which, what did we call it again?
The Lionel John Deere?
That chat member will be forever.
I'll make that a shirt.
I'll make that a shirt.
But, yeah, the Lionel John Deere tractor.
We took that, and there was a riot that was forming in front of us.
It has a name. Wasn't it, like, Bertha?
No, it's not Bertha.
Yeah, yeah, you immediately renamed that shit.
We call it tits or something, right?
Oh, we wrote tits on it.
But it is the Lionel John Deere.
Yeah, for the Lionel John Deere, we plowed through a protest that was happening in front of a...
You got snacks, dude?
Can you interrupt the intro with snacks?
Snacky, leave him alone!
What? No, no, no. What are you eating?
Um, what do you got?
Okay, okay, one sec.
You're getting billed for fucking Zoran's therapy after this session, I swear to God.
Fuck you! You deflecting son of a bitch!
It's one of those artificially flavored stretches of candy that's in, like, a...
It's something, I think if they're called airheads, it's very good.
It's a piece of candy.
Delightful.
Thank you.
I love my stretch candy.
Mm-hmm.
You do the recap.
You do it.
You do it.
Come on.
Come on.
Okay, but this thing's really delicious.
The aggression in this stream is palpable.
I'm upset.
First chat can't read, now you eat candy.
I think what really makes it great about the Lionel John Deere is that, you know, Rogel Dorn and Lehman Russ get tanks named after them, but not Lionel Johnson.
He gets a tractor.
That's the important thing to take away from your priorities.
It's because no one plays Dark Angels.
Yeah, no one.
Yeah, not a single soul.
Nope.
Type one if you play Dark Angels, and if you do type one, you're lying.
Ban them.
Yes, ban them.
We're going to ban them.
If they type one, they get a permavan.
Mod, ban everyone who's to type one.
Get rid of them.
Mod, send them to the woods.
First time chatter.
First time chatter.
There was a protest happening in front of the ruins, and of course they were of the children of the dawn, people who were being manipulated by the Jukari to believe in something other than just a god emperor himself.
Maybe some weird manifestation being played by these disgusting Xenos.
And of course, I think we either grenaded them, or we did something with them.
Grenade.
We didn't war crime.
Just don't worry about that.
After, you know, successfully dealing with them in a peaceful manner, the fit of the Imperium of Man, we settled ourselves deeper and deeper into the ruins themselves.
As we were skulking around, finding a flashlight anchored on to an old Imperial Guardsman corpse, it helped light their way towards some further ruins deeper underground, where they found two Jukari guards.
After skillfully handing them a hot potato pineapple, they were swiftly dealt with, but of course, after we turned around, as if befitting our spooky month, there was a monster that ambushed our party.
After gracefully dealing with the monster with barely any damage to the party, we now stand in the middle of the ruins, looking further down the path that the ruins, ready to fight the rest of the Jukari if they are there.
So, Thurston, what adventure do you have for us today?
Well, you've defeated the Claude Beast.
And with that, you have a brief moment of respite to take a bit of short rest, recover your shock.
But the question is, will you be pursuing further into the areas?
That's sort of the next step here.
Yes.
Right, excellent.
Bruce likes to the rest of the party.
We're going down there, right?
Well, of course we are.
This beast is one of the first foul Xenos that has been plaguing this world.
It's in the two dreadful centuries.
No doubt there are more of their number.
And me.
Oh, well, I tried to forget about you.
I won't forget about you.
See, Captain Bruce likes me.
Well, let's save the-
I won't forget about you either, best assured.
And look back to Aloysus, who's wrist deep in the skull of his Claude Fiend.
Uh, find anything?
I would like to make a Medicaid check to get some samples of its brain.
Okay.
That seems legit.
Um, it's Xenos.
It's weird.
The difficulty here is probably going to be a four.
Okay.
I'm sure you don't have any status effects.
Do I still have status effects imposed on me?
I'm double-checking.
Oh.
Am I still afeard of the dead creature?
Uh, uh, you know what?
No.
We can-
We can-
Yeah, you can get rid of that.
Uh, everyone check under your effects if there's anything that shouldn't be their spells or otherwise you can-
Or psychic powers, I should say, or anything, you can remove them.
There we go.
We fixed it.
Oh, yay.
D and four.
Here we go.
Uh, you said we recover our shock?
Yeah, you can-
You can take a rest to recover your shock.
And I got a crit.
Nice.
Ooh, very good, very good.
Um, so your- your glory goes up by- by Uno.
Good job, good job, good job.
Full, full, full glory, full glory.
Very good, very good, very good.
Um, with that, you manage to obtain the cerebral cortex of this strange Xenos entity.
I don't know what else to say beyond you get the brain-
Yeah.
You get it.
What on earth are you-
I just needed some samples.
I- I have plenty of tests to run on this one.
Radwell.
Make certain that no samples that you take endanger my ship when you bring it aboard.
Nonsense.
They're perfectly harmless once they're deceased.
Well, unless we toss them to a servitor, but I don't have the resources to make a-
An Ursae unit right now.
But maybe we could later on.
I'm going to take a look at the Clawfiend.
How much of it is intact?
Um, not- not a ton.
Um, there was a- a fair amount of damage that was done to this thing, right?
Like, it- it got killed by, like, ripper gun bayonetting.
Um, which is a pretty, like, visceral- visceral, um, attack.
So- and an arc pistol that, you know, was- was going at it.
There- there were some things that have just torn this thing apart.
Like, like, like, there's big body chunks and, you know, some of the interiors are relatively intact.
But, you know, as far as overall how it is, not that great.
Ah, what a disappointment.
Part of me had hoped to have it mounted and stuffed in my quarters.
Ah, there's plenty more of these fiends out there in the galaxy, Captain.
All we need to do is hunt out where the Drukhari are, and typically they have one in tow.
Well, let's hope there aren't that many more left here.
Are we all ready to persist, or do you need a moment more to rest yourselves, comrades?
No, I think we should be all right.
I'm ready, sir.
Ready as I'll ever be.
Ready to go, Captain.
Excellent.
Now, keep in mind, the Drukhari lines have likely already been devastated by this clawed fiend
going off the intelligence that we received from the two sentries.
That doesn't mean that they're neutralized.
If anything, it means that they're going to be sending in extra patrols
to recontore and reclaim this area, and soon be prepared for anything.
Kelrana will require your expertise to make sure that we can find
the source of these Drukhari and eliminate it.
Roy, I'll do my damnedest.
Excellent.
Now then, for the Emperor.
For the Emperor.
For the Emperor.
I realized something.
I'm being an unfair GM.
I just want to step back.
Uh-oh.
Yeah?
Speaker.
Yes?
If you want an intact corpse, you know, that is something you could narratively declare.
Ooh, that is something.
But I think it's okay.
I think that this corpse has been diegetically destroyed.
But what I will do is I will spend one of my wrath to narratively declare the head is in good enough state
to be separated and taxidermied at a later date.
Without the brain, which was just extracted.
Yeah, it wasn't taxidermy with a brain attack.
Yeah, they could do some flesh weaving or something.
Take all that shit out of there.
Actually, yeah.
If, you know, obviously I don't think you do it to something of the size of a Claude Fiend,
but what was common practice back in the old times, you would taxidermy shit utilizing chemicals from the brain.
You would, like, use the brain to tan the leather.
I didn't know that.
I didn't actually know that.
That's fascinating.
Yeah.
From rubbing brain.
I'm going to move on from that comment.
That makes a lot of sense.
Yeah.
Russo, help carry the head.
I'm going to get for you, sir.
Put someone's back.
Oh, thank you.
I must appreciate it.
But unfortunately, there are more pressing matters in my taxidermy collection.
Alonzi, let us move forward.
All right.
Onward and upward.
You carry on past the gateway, entering into, you know, a larger sort of, you're in this nave section.
As you go in, you enter what, it's clearly something else in here.
Passing through the nave and the statue, the rune statues, you can see a vast, like, curved architecture of this sort of white bone-like substance that's mostly collapsed.
But there is one sort of prong that is standing upright, and it crackles with electrical energy.
Uh, like...
Witchlight.
Oh.
I would recognize this.
Some kind of way of webs.
I like spiders.
Yeah, Russo, that's the dimension full of spiders.
As you see this, Kelrana, all of you then immediately hear a, like, whip-crack snap as something embeds itself in the ground.
Like, the, the discharge of some high-powered weapon.
Um, it, it strikes the ground maybe a meter to a meter and a half away from you.
Clearly a distant warning shot.
But the, the sort of ground, the, the, not stone, but again, this bone substance ground, um, is kind of pushed up by this.
There's, like, an indentation.
Something is in, um, in the ground there and has disturbed a lot of the, uh, the, the bone work there.
Fucking whip-way gate.
Yeah, we're gonna need to get that taken down.
Um, taken down, I see.
And what measures are most effective at ruining this piece of technology?
Uh, what, what would I roll to, no, how best to close off a webway gate, Thurston?
Scholar?
Because I'm bad at that.
Um, I would love to be able to assist if not roll outright because Aloysius has done a lot of dealings with the Eldar.
Yeah, you could, I, I, I mean, I mean, tech would be good, as would, um, honestly, psychic mastery.
Ah, psychic mastery?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Well, I'll roll you a psychic mastery.
Please don't summon demons.
No promises, it is funny.
Uh, what's my DN?
No, it isn't!
Heh heh heh heh heh.
Uh, what, what was my DN, Thurston?
Uh, for this, uh, for you, I will say, um, will be difficulty six.
Oof.
Yeah.
It's toughy.
Uh, oh, just made it.
That's six successes.
Yeah, so that's enough for you to tell, um, that this is a, a, a damaged gateway.
Um, something, something is malfunctioning here, um, it's kind of coming in and out, it's, it's not a stable portal.
It could be used, um, you're not able to get close enough to really interface with the, the kind of psycho, um, matrices of this thing, um, based off of the gunshot that has been in the ground in front of you, right?
Like, like, you'd have to get closer, and that would require maybe moving more out into the open from where you are.
Uh, I'd have to get a little closer to the thing, but it seems like our friends are already aware of us.
Um, are there Eldar that are, like, visible in the area?
Uh, you can certainly give me an awareness test to see if you like, and that could probably be something that you're doing as Kelrana is, you know, doing, doing the psychic stuff.
And Aloysius is going to be doing some, some tech analysis.
If you want to give an awareness test, just, uh.
Sure, yeah, absolutely.
Let me, uh, take a quick look.
I assume DN3?
Uh, well, it's going to be opposed, so you don't have to actually put in the DN there.
Okay.
Um, I'm just, uh, you know, gonna do a little.
So I'll give you four successes.
Sweet.
I'm just going to roll a thing just cause.
Cool.
Um, yeah, uh, you're not, you're not seeing anything.
As far as I can tell, the coast seems clear.
We have just been short, uh, Captain.
Oh.
Well, in that case.
Then get down, sir.
Bruce, like, tackles him, like, get down, Mr. President.
Absolutely.
And as you do, uh, just, just to not skip over poor Hulky.
Uh, Aloysius, do you want to give me your tech check?
Uh, your difficulty here is going to be eight.
Oh.
Okay.
Oh.
Yeah.
Let's find out what happens.
I got it.
Damn.
I was about to say.
And you got us a glory.
We're full of glory, by the way.
So, you know, Chad, I've, we've lowered the, the ruin and the, uh, glory total.
So, it's much easier for us to get that now.
So.
Yay.
This is the power of hatred, my friends.
Oh, you don't hate us.
Hatred?
You're right.
It's a strong word.
I'm fascinated by your kind, but intrigued.
And though I below the Eldari in your hearty ways, there is something to be gleaned of your failures.
Uh, so, your, your analysis is, you could probably shut this thing off.
You couldn't, you know, operate it or anything of the like, but you could definitely shut this thing off.
In a way that you're fairly certain wouldn't cause some kind of psychoactive, um, resonance that would cause the warp to manifest on this planet in ways that could bring forth the end of times.
Good to know.
And, and with that, as you make this discovery, uh, Roos tackles the good captain.
Oh, there he goes.
Get down, sir.
Roos, you're, thank you very much for your vigilance, but you're currently crushing my kidneys.
You're better than you get shot, sir.
Not that much.
Don't worry to the wine you drink, sir.
Please get off of me.
Roos gets up.
As you, as, as, as, as you get up, there is like a, a sibilant, uh, speech coming out from, uh, from, from the darkness ahead.
Stay away, monkey.
Am I counted in that, cousin?
You, I see you, you must not stay here.
You should go.
The, the gate is not safe.
The gate's not safe.
What makes it unsafe?
It is broken.
Broken?
The other realm seeps through it.
The dark kin came through it.
They seek to use it again to escape, but I have barred them.
Boy, you said the dark kin used it.
Are you not Rukari?
No.
I am from Yilkaith of Ulkari.
Do I recognize that, uh, craft world?
Uh, craft world Ulkari is the, the, the correct name.
Um, so it is, it is, it is a, it is a craft world that is known to, to be around this particular system.
Uh, you probably would have known about it from when you, um, when you came in here.
It's a crashed craft world.
So the craft world itself crashed on, on an ice world.
Oh, okay.
Um, there are corsairs, um, like the green steel warriors that are sworn to protect the craft world.
So it is like craft world that tends to have like pretty good ties with, uh, with like Eldari pirates and whatnot.
Oh, okay.
Uh, in that case, yeah, uh, I'm going to look down at the bullet in the ground.
Does it look like, uh, like it was from a splinter pistol or does it look like a shuriken?
It, it, it, it, it, it has, it, it appears to be a segmented piece of, of bone that, that looks to be some kind of shuriken-esque design.
Ah, all right.
Yeah, Kelrana is just going to, uh, hold up her hands in like a pacifying gesture.
We're not here to hurt you.
We're here to put a stop to what the Darkkin are doing in the area.
They're fucking with the local population.
We're here to stock up the ship and, uh, deal with that.
There was a creature running around here.
You familiar with it?
Yes.
We killed it.
You?
Well, we, it was a team effort.
Well, I suppose you have a beast of your own.
Oh, Rose, he said that you're, he said that you went beast mode.
He's a X-Dos, fuck him.
Oh, come on.
Um, it, wait.
He kind of looks down and he's like, I guess they stone.
How visible is the stone on you, Rose?
Visible is the stone?
Oh, yeah, he, he still wears it with pride.
Like, he doesn't hide it.
Why does he have that?
It's a long story and we really don't have time to interrogate it at the moment.
And, you know, I would highly advise against trying to get it off his person.
He's keeping it rather safe.
So you can step out.
We're not going to hurt you.
I promise my compatriots here are perfectly friendly to our kind.
Right, guys?
Excellent.
Lure him out so that we might execute him.
Shut up.
We're perfectly safe to you, Eldari.
Yeah, maybe stay at least a handful of meters from this one.
Wait, I'm sorry.
Are you talking, are you preserving the life of one of the dark Eldar?
No, he's not, Darkin.
You can step out.
Promise, none of them are going to hurt you.
That one just said he would absolutely kill me.
Well, he's not going to, right, Captain?
By my honor, as an Imperial officer, I give you a stay of execution.
Now, piss off.
Yeah, you're fine.
Oh, God, I'm going to, I'm going to, like, oh, God, I'm going to regret all of this.
But sure.
Kelrana, my good friend.
Yes.
What's your persuasion like?
Oh, boy.
Well, my persuasion, one.
Kelrana is very not charismatic.
See, I was going to be like, oh, it's difficulty six to convince this person to come out.
But then I'm like, oh, you're an Eldar, so I'll make it difficulty four.
Um, I could dump all the glory into it.
We do have glory.
You could.
Thanks to chat.
Yeah.
It's good.
Leave us with one, but yeah.
Yeah, I'll, okay.
So it's first I roll.
Then I spend wrath.
Then wrath.
Then glory.
Yeah.
You can't wrath glory dice?
No.
No.
You cannot.
Okay.
So, Dian, you said four?
Four.
Okay.
Yeah.
Okay.
Okay.
Would you like to spend your wrath to re-roll that?
I'd love to.
I'd love to.
Okay.
I love farming out their points from them, Chad.
It's just so easy.
No more wrath.
Oh, I have to put it on my fucking sheet.
Yeah, you do.
Get good.
Yeah, we always start out with two.
Well, it was the same number.
You guys mind if I dump the glory?
Dump it.
Dump it.
Dump it.
Dump it.
All six?
You're going to roll all six?
Yes.
I'm crashing the market.
All right.
Tell the watch how this much hurts, Chad.
Quantum immortality.
Oh, my fucking God.
Well, well, you have three successes.
Yeah.
To read after the chat, she rolled a four, four, three, a four, a one, and then a three.
Oh, one sec, one sec.
I'm going to get this little candy wrapper.
It's so tasty.
Shut up.
Also, it's a great point.
There's someone who hates eating noises losing their damn mind right now.
That's Zoran the Bear.
Zoran the Bear is losing his damn mind right now.
Hey, Thurston Hale-man on Call GM.
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
Since I am the subject of this Eldar's fear, could I attempt to assist my poor, poor, poor elven companion in this endeavor?
Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.
So you're looking to assist?
All right.
Well, we could probably find something for you to do.
What are you looking to assist with here?
Uh, essentially, I'm going to put my hands off of my gun.
I will holster it.
Mm-hmm.
And I will put my hand on my head, or on my hat, I should say, and I will once again reiterate,
By my honor as an officer of the Imperium of Man, I guarantee you that unless you seek to bring harm to us, no harm shall fall upon you by my hand.
Okay, so you can choose, um, either your ranks in Persuasion or your Fellowship, probably, I'm guessing, your Fellowship, um, which is five, uh, and you can roll those dice to assist.
Okie dokie.
Ha ha, yay!
All right, so that is five successes, which is good, because the DN now goes up by two, because there's a non-Eldari involved, so that is still enough to, uh, to, to get this individual to come out of cover.
Um, you see that they, they slowly emerge.
Um, they, they look very different.
They have sort of a, um, kind of white and green, uh, appearance of armor, primarily some whites.
Uh, they have a pistol at the ready and a long rifle that they have slung over their back.
Oh, he's from Bjeltan!
Get him!
Do-do-do-do-do-do-do.
He already said he's not from Bjeltan.
Yeah, I know, but white and green, that's the Bjeltan.
All the Zedars, like you said.
All he doesn't know.
True.
All just has an irrational hatred against Bjeltan.
True, true, true, true.
It's, it's, if it's, if it's against Bjeltan, it's not irrational.
I understand deep Eldar racism.
Wasn't it, wasn't it Bjeltan flyers that were the absolute worst in, uh, 8th edition?
No, that was the Leitok flyers.
A Leitok, right, right, right.
The problem with Bjeltan is, um, they, they're the coolest Eldar craft world, in my humble opinion.
Their gimmick is, is that, um, yeah, no, we're doing the Eldar Empire still,
and they're super racist against humans.
Hell yeah.
They, they are voted most likely to, uh, drop the M word.
Right, right, right.
At any given an interaction.
As this one did in the opening line, yes.
Right, see, we're all okay, we're all cooperating, we're all friends here.
Why does he have the stone?
Frankly.
It's just, like, looking at Rus and the stone.
Frankly, I'm not entirely sure.
He's, um, he's convinced it was a commissar of his.
I am, however, uh, yeah.
What?
I'm familiar with the individual that is actually inside that stone, and so I've stuck around.
What?
Rus is petting his stone.
It's, it's complicated.
He takes good care of it, at least.
He's cleaning it.
If anything would have, if anything would have happened to that stone, frankly, I think he'd throw himself into a pyre, so.
You, the, the, the, the, the Zeno speaks to you, Rus.
Oh.
Monk Illa, you give up stone.
No.
Goes back to cleaning stone.
Huh.
This is my commissar.
You're not taking my commissar away from me.
He's protected me for many years.
Not sure why it's got an affinity to him.
But, uh, I don't know.
He was always an old duck.
Strange.
Deeply.
But stranger things have happened in this wonderful weird galaxy of ours, so.
Why don't we start talking about the dark kin.
What's the presence here actually like?
We took out two of them that were garden something down the way.
Took out that creature.
And now we're trying to figure out what exactly they're doing to manipulate the monkey in this area.
Ten more on the upper level.
And, like, she sort of, like, waves up with, with their, their, their pistol.
Kind of indicating a, a set of spiral stairs that lead off to another section.
I waited here.
Kept them from returning through the gateway.
So you've been preventing them from leaving?
Yes.
What brings you here?
I was sent from the craft world to make sure they could not turn the monkey even further against us.
So the monkey have been causing you trouble?
Always, always, always with their wasteful ways and their corpse god.
First kind of voice in the voice is, why did you keep saying slurs like that?
I mean.
Yeah, Alois is the only one who can understand this conversation.
It's, they have this whole hate boner for the entirety of humanity because we managed to survive.
And their species was reduced to a bunch of people puttering around on ships broken beyond repair through the stars.
But we have holy terror.
And of course.
They're, they're, they're a little bit jaded because they fucked a garden to existence.
And the status of my boner is none of your concern.
Well, sounds of me they should have gotten good.
What?
Too true.
What?
Alois will put his fist out for a fist bump.
You fist bumped back.
Yeah, humanity.
Yeah.
What?
Okay.
It's, you know, really not making me look good here, guys.
Not that I needed help with that.
But ye gods.
Anyhow, we are also here to put a stop to the Dark Kins.
But it seems like we are in accord at the moment.
Seems like we've got the same objective.
So.
Yes.
I will wait here.
Guard the portal.
You go and slay them.
Very well.
Make sure that none of them come out of it.
How, uh, how likely are reinforcements?
They contacted, they contacted, they contacted the Dark City or anything?
The, the Dark City?
Yeah.
The Dark City.
They got, they got friends.
I was waiting for a speaker.
That was, that was like.
Okay, I didn't know.
I didn't know.
Yeah.
I jumped on it.
Why would Alden Rosh react to talk about the Dark City in a conversation in another language?
First of all, first of all, uh, the Eldar is now, is, well, has been the whole time speaking broken gothic.
Oh.
Oh, I see.
I thought this was all an Eldari.
I thought it was an Eldari.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You, you assumed.
And he also dropped the hard M word, which I want to point out, you've now also heard Kelrana drop a few times.
So, take that as you will.
Not very talk to Ato after this.
Yeah.
Also, um, um, fucking, I was not expecting Alden Rosh.
I was waiting for Speaker D.
There we go.
There we go.
Is everyone happy now?
Yeah.
Yeah.
He did the, he did the thing.
He said the thing, guys.
He said the thing.
Accident.
Okay.
So, all right.
So, how, how likely are reinforcements?
There is me.
How likely are reinforcements for them?
The gate does not function correctly.
They are a lone war, war party.
I like the sound of that.
Very well.
We get in.
We take them out.
We keep them from, uh, fucking around with the good people of this planet.
And, uh.
Good people?
And then, uh, the people of this planet.
And then, do you have a way home?
I can traverse through the gateway, stable enough for me, since, uh, Ul'Khari is in system.
Short journey through the broken gate.
Good.
But we will need to close gate when I go through.
That I can do.
I am, uh, attuned to that sort of thing.
So, I think I could pull it off.
I just assume Aloysius pulls it like a chainsaw and is like, I got it, too.
Don't worry.
I can certainly turn this one off.
Right.
Well, if you end up needing a ride back, I'm sure my friends would be more than happy to provide.
Hold a moment.
I would rather die.
Look, listen.
I understand.
It's, it's a shithole, but it, it, it flies.
It's a shithole, but it's all a shithole.
I'll have you know that the Bird of Paradise is one of the finest drilled crews and well-maintained vessels this side of the Imperial Navy.
And it has been the end of more than a few vessels of your misbegotten ilk and could outfly even you Eldari Corses' finest vessels of the line.
I don't own a ship.
This isn't really, uh, uh.
Yes, you don't, because you are a far different class of person than I, and you do not command as fine a ship as I.
And I had a pressing question for the Eldar.
Which one?
Not you.
All right.
You are sending us to go face off against the remainder of the kin, yes?
Yes.
How many?
Ten.
Ten.
I said that already.
I see.
What sort of armaments are they equipped with?
There are four of them of the witch cult with their, their leader, and six of them of the Kabbalite class.
No incubi.
We're lucky.
Will that suffice, small man?
I suppose it will.
But just know that if you are not true to your word in any way, attempt a charlatan's maneuver, attempt to stab us in the back while we work towards your bidding, I can assure you, you will not be the only Eldar to pay the price.
Is that a threat against all of my people?
Only if you threaten mine, can I gesture to the crew.
Like the camera pans and it's like, Roos like shining the, shining the, the, the stone.
And her voice is like, analyzing how to destroy this, like, piece of Eldar, like, architecture.
And then, Kelrana, question mark.
Kelrana just stood there, abosing.
The edge is closer to the Eldar, so it makes it look like the two Eldar are in frame together.
God, I can't wait till I'm out of this gods forsaken system.
All right, fine.
We'll go kill the Elds.
Gods.
Plural.
Ah, sing.
He's a lost hide.
Oh, you got me, guys.
All right, you're getting taken away now.
All right, that's fine.
I had a good run.
You had a good run, buddy.
Okay, let's wrap your brain.
All right, all right.
That doesn't happen.
Thank you for allowing me my pen and tree to carry on.
You're very, very welcome.
Okay, I'm satisfied with this scene.
I, you know, let's go.
All right.
Thank you for your assistance.
We'll make sure you get out all right.
Yes.
I wish that you survive.
I wish you survive, too.
And I'm sure that the rest of them probably will.
They're my ride.
Oh, and the stone.
I wish the stone survives, too.
He is sort of already dead.
I wish that it lasts intact.
There we go.
Now I'm being the pedant.
All right, shall we?
Yes.
Yes.
Let us move and quickly.
The less time I spend on this noxious company, the better.
Bruce takes the front.
Yes, yes.
He grabs another spicy rock.
Oh.
Oh, no.
We have more specimens I would like to acquire.
Try to keep one of them alive, Bruce.
You could break their legs.
That's fine.
I don't break their legs.
Yes, you do.
You're so good at it, my friend.
And you, uh, craft will, uh, how does the phrase go?
I believe it is...
I don't speak hip-hop.
What?
It translates to, may the blessings of Asurion protect the children of Asurion from abomination.
Hey, hey, why are you spawning a bunch of dudes there, huh?
I like how I'm like, I'll move the tokens onto the map, you know, get ready.
And Asurion's like, I see what you're doing.
I'm going to show the whole audience what you're doing.
I'm like, what are you doing, man?
Come on, man.
Are we going to another part of the map?
Are we doing the things?
We're staying right here.
We're staying right here.
What about Asurion?
Can we go to another core on the map so we at least get a change of something?
Like, the top left up here or something?
Get some change of scenery.
Sure, sure.
Asurion's adventure package they have gave us no fucking maps.
You get nothing.
I was considering getting community maps, but I didn't want to go through the whole process of emailing them all and then licensing and blah, blah, blah, blah.
Yeah.
Good day, sir.
Good day.
All right.
All right.
All right.
So, carrying on up the staircase, I believe.
Yes.
Yes, indeed.
Yig.
Yig.
Bruce in front.
Bruce in front.
Okay.
Aloysius in back.
Yeah.
Please keep me away.
I'm very scared.
Please don't make me do my job.
I like to flash my inquisitorial symbol and hopefully not get in combat.
Yeah, I'm desperately trying to not be shot or penetrated.
My defense is my status.
Everybody knows that the Dark Eldar, they really respect the Inquisition, especially.
I feel it.
It's true.
They get on great, those two.
They do.
Oh, we're going to be all right coming up here, right?
We're going to survive this fight.
I mean, you've fought Dark Eldar before, right, sir?
I mean, we're going to survive this one, huh?
Actually, I think he has.
Ask later, and the time is right.
All right, sir.
I'll ask later.
And that's foreshadowing to the round of combat that Zoran is going to set out in order to ask the Rock again.
So true.
Zoran doesn't have good luck with the Rock, as evidenced by a Kingmaker recording we had last night.
Oh, no.
Fuck you, dude.
Get tucked on.
All right.
I'm going to shimmy us over here.
You move up the stairs.
Again, we have the Rus taking the front, Aloysius in the back, and then Alden and Kelrana sort of in the middle points.
You find that the upper mezzanine area is carved columns depicting the bizarre harvests of the Eldari god.
And there are these kind of square shrine annexes off to each of the sides here, each dedicated to a member of this, you know, filthy pagan pantheon.
Most of the statues are derelict or desecrated beyond any sort of identifiability.
As you carry on in, you have this, like, smell that starts hitting you.
It's like a reek of rotting wounds, stale air, and smoke.
Ew.
Yeah, that's the Drukhari.
There are bodies that start to appear that are chained to several of the statues.
These are all greater prominence until further up ahead, kind of on this area.
You see a group of four Eldari women that are sort of dressed in revealing but kind of form-fitting clothing, like gladiator wear, all wielding, like, a different sort of variety of weapons, kind of painful implements that they're using on some of these individuals.
And they are led by one who clearly has a bit more of a leadership role.
This one, she wields some sort of kind of vicious-looking weapon that's hard to identify as you stare at it.
And then up above them, on sort of a balcony a bit further up with stairs that lead up, are six sort of troops who stand sentinel.
You're kind of approaching this and see it.
The groups are sort of waiting for you.
It's very clear that they're aware of the presence of someone coming.
They're sort of continuing their dark ministrations right up until the point of your arrival.
There's a good amount of distance between you.
I'm actually going to kind of move your tokens a bit further down here just to represent that.
There's a good amount of space between you.
But there really isn't much in the way of cover.
Again, there are some columns, which I'll just, you know, drop onto here.
Some very basic columns, which I'm hoping will stick.
There we go.
But there is not much else.
That's it.
There we go.
So you see all of this as you approach.
You get to nominate someone to go first in this scene as you kind of come into this macabre, gruesome area.
The leading individual from the Eldari turns towards you, very clearly is reacting to your presence by giving a bit of a warning to their troops.
But you, as a party, get to decide what the buts you want to do going first here.
Bruce, who's?
Who's?
Yes?
I grenade.
They die.
That is certainly an option.
Well, if somebody else got something they want to try.
Yes, I think I actually, it's unlikely that we're going to find them this clumped together.
I say, you take the initiative, old man.
Don't think it's possible we send them.
Don't know if it's possible that we just send them running through the webway gate.
Why on earth would we do that?
Well, easier than wasting the bullets.
No bullet that found itself in the skull of a dark elder was ever wasted.
Fair enough.
Oh, Gris, can I do it, sir?
Can I blow them up?
Absolutely, Roos.
May the Emperor guide you.
Roos charges.
He runs up to one of the pillars here.
Okay.
And, like, taking cover for his move action.
And then he's going to basically try to throw his frag bomb as hard as he can.
He's going to aim for the middle of them here.
Okay, so remember, these ones here are elevated.
So you're not going to catch both of them in a blast, effectively.
You can get one of the groups.
Huh?
How elevated?
Um, like, probably...
Your shrapnel still goes everywhere.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Because the higher they are, the more effective that grenade would be.
But that's what grenades are.
But I'll get your logic.
I'll go game-wise.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Like, okay, okay, yes, yes.
Will there be shrapnel and other things?
Yes, yes, but they're also behind heavy cover.
There's a bunch of things.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And you would also, if you want to get the grenades to work that way, you're going to have to make sure that it, like, doesn't detonate on the ground, which is another...
There's variables here.
You could try for it.
You could, but it'll just be harder.
Regardless, I'll still throw it in the middle there.
Okay.
So, with this, as we get to relearn how it goes, what's my DN, Mr. Thurston?
Okay.
So, in this point, you are attacking with a grenade.
So, you're throwing an area of effect weapon.
Let's see here.
The difficulty number is...
Difficulty three, ballistic skill, but you do apply range as normal.
So, what is the range on the grenade that you have?
I do not know.
So, that would be under the equipment section.
Oh, 10.
There it is.
Okay.
So, the distance of this would be 13 meters.
13.
Yeah.
Okay.
So, you kind of go over...
I want to see something real quick.
Can I go potentially faster than that?
Let's see.
Because my movement is sick.
So, one, two, three, four, five.
Oh, I can actually get up to here.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
So, I'll do that.
Minimize that risk.
And then, yeah, 10 will work out right there.
Okay.
I don't have to take an extra penalty on that.
So, three.
Yeah.
Ballistic skill, three.
All right.
Good luck, everybody.
Okay.
We're going to wrath it.
Okay.
Fair enough.
We're going to wrath it as much as we can here, fellas.
Because I only rolled a five and did a three and a two.
And I feel like, you know, we're going to need to, you know, fix that real quick.
Bump those numbers up.
Yeah.
Just get a six on one of these two dice.
You're fine.
A ball.
A ball.
Yeah, I got a six.
Yeah, they got a wrath critical.
I get a crit.
I don't think grenades crit in the traditional sense, but we'll take a look.
All right.
I did it, sir.
Yeah.
Okay, so the attack hits.
Okay, so this is going to go into a mob.
So, this is a mob and not like a standard thing.
So, what you need to do is roll damage.
All right, rolling damage.
That's 14 damage with blast eight.
Okay.
Cool.
Hey, Chad, you guys want to rules lawyer us?
Can grenades crit in Wrath and Glory?
I don't know.
Possibly?
Like, it's, like, click the roll critical hit effect, I guess.
I don't know.
Oh, roll damage again.
My bad.
Ignore that one.
Oh, yeah.
All right.
Roll the crit thing.
That was a one.
Headshot.
Yeah, the iconic grenade headshot.
The grenade headshot.
Well, okay, okay, okay.
It's an airburst.
I was about to say, if you've played Darktide before, you can throw it at the head, I guess, is probably what happens.
A lot of stuff happens in war.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I love my rook.
Stranger things have happened.
Yeah.
Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.
So.
Okay.
No, it's, sorry, and sorry for the delay here.
It's because grenades work differently on mobs, and we haven't really mucked around with mob rules too much in this game.
Yeah, we tried to do a bunch of test sessions beforehand, but there's things in the combat system that really slow it down.
And I'm, like, I'm just trying to make sure, because what I'm trying to make sure is that it's just not a, like, yeah, you instantly kill everyone, which is quite likely it could be, and then this will just be a really short combat.
Yeah, that's fine.
But that's what I'm double checking.
Mob.
Oh, here we go.
Mob targets.
Okay.
Okay, so the blast rating on that, on a frag grenade, six to eight.
Okay, so you actually hit three of them.
Okay, cool.
So you're just going to fucking take out three of them here.
Boom!
Ooh.
Yeah.
Boom.
You just immediately, because it's 14 damage, you said?
Yes.
Yeah, that's just going to fucking, like, mince me three of them.
The other two manage to die for cover.
The leader's out of the way, as they aren't, like, specifically targeted.
They just get, they get pushed out, and it's these two who remain.
You throw it.
You also kill the poor torture victims who are on the, the, the, the sort of, like, racks that were near them.
It was a mercy that they would have asked for.
It's true.
Probably.
It's true, exactly.
And then debris just sort of showers up top, getting the, the, sort of, the warriors up top, kind of covered in a, in a bit of detritus.
All right.
That, I guess, at this point, Roos is gone.
I can set my, I'm just going to.
Yeah, one glory to seize.
Yeah, if you want to, yeah.
Um, yeah, you know what?
I, I think I will.
I think I will, actually.
Okay.
You guys will.
Because, uh, I think Alden Roos is going to come in.
I've got, uh, essentially after this shot, I think one more clip left.
Uh, I'm going to rock out between these two pillars.
I'm going to, uh, keep my hotshot, uh, uh, volley gun ready.
And I'm going to do some suppressing fire on this background mob of cabalites.
Okay.
I want to try and reduce their ability to be able to, uh, uh, punish us horribly with black light, or sorry, dark light, uh, or in splinter rounds.
Okay.
Um, so you're doing a pinning attack?
Yes, I am.
Yeah, absolutely.
So, pinning attack, uh, self-one, make a pinning attack, deals.
Okay, the difficulty is equal to the target's resolve.
So, you just, um, yeah, you make it a attack, uh, with the weapon, ballistic skill, versus their resolve.
Awesome.
Uh, what's their resolve?
Uh, their resolve, let me pull it up, is two.
Okay.
You Falzinos, fear the Emperor's Wrath!
Uh, I fear, uh, the Falzinos Wrath after that one.
I'm going to spend a wrath to reroll!
You have one success on six dice.
Yeah, let's, uh, let's roll that.
Let's spend a wrath there.
Let's, uh, just blind firing around the corner, like,
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Okay, great.
Let's spend a wrath, let's reroll that.
Yeah.
Oh my god.
It's one more.
Well, I got the difficulty number.
It gets, and, and so you'll get one, you, you suppress one member of the mob.
Take that!
I, yeah.
Got him.
Do we have any glory left in the pool, guys?
No.
Nope.
I used it all to be completely riz-less in front of violent people.
Ah!
Okay, that's my turn.
There's, like, this fucking, like, like, fucking, like, okay, this is, this is our combat so far.
Fucking roost-like commando runs up, pulls out this grenade, throws it, literally hurls the grenade,
and it beds itself in the head of an, of, of this Eldari witch, who, like, stands there one moment, her face aghast in shock before the grenade explodes, taking out, you know, two more of her friends, dousing debris everywhere.
The cabalites come up, and then fucking Captain Alden Rush comes in, um, like, he's, I don't know, in tropic thunder, just fucking firing off his gun, um, and one cabalite is like, whoa, whoa, that could maybe hit me, um, and the rest of them are like, hmm, hmm, mediocre, mediocre.
Um, all right, with that being said, the remaining cabalite warriors, um, having some clear identifications of threat, um, are going to fire at our dear friend, um, Roos, who is up, um, behind a, um, behind a pillar, so that is going to give you a little bit of, um, a little bit of coverage.
Over here, so that'll be good.
Um, they are going to attack you, Roos.
One of them is pinned, so they will not count, so they're only going to count as a mob of five here.
Um, they are going to shoot at you with a splinter rifle.
No!
Yes.
Um, so, so what's your, what's your defense, Roos?
Uh, my defense is, sorry, I was trying to get music figured out, uh, is two.
Two, but I assume I'm in, uh, good cover.
So four?
Yeah, four.
Yeah, perfect.
Okay.
Um, so they are going to shoot you.
Yeah.
So...
I'm in the chat says that, uh, crits also apply to everybody hit by them.
Oh.
So if you want to play...
Well, everyone, all three of them were dead by the damage anyways, so...
Yeah, yeah.
So the head, the headshot just, um, gushed out to everyone in there.
All right.
Um, so they are going to fire at you.
Uh, the difficulty number is four.
Um, they are then going to add...
One, two, three, four, six.
They are going to add three dice to this, because they are, they are a group together.
And, uh, they are going to all aim at you and fire.
So let's see what happens.
I'm going to hit you.
No!
We can't see your eyes.
I'm going to spend a...
Oh, sorry.
You can't see my dice?
Sorry, sorry, sorry.
Yeah, I got you.
I'll, I'll, I'll reveal this to everyone.
Oh, dear.
And then...
Oh, no.
I'm going to spend a rune point.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
He's doing it.
He's doing it, chat.
I am.
I am.
All right.
Excellent.
What'd you pay for?
It is what I paid, it is what they paid for.
Uh, then I'm going to take these two shifts that I've got, these two glorious shifts.
Well, don't do that.
I'm going to shift them for damage.
Well, don't do that.
And then I'm going to roll damage on poor Roos, as, like, a hail of splinter fire comes down from the mezzanine.
Ooh.
Um, I'm going to do eight points of damage, um, but I don't think that's the important part here.
My resilience is nine.
Yeah.
Yeah, so now we get to learn about my favorite thing in this game, um, which will be, let's see, the condition.
Remember, closer to your mic.
Flicked condition.
Bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop.
Okay.
Um.
So, every inflict, oh, if it deals a wound, so it has to wound you.
So your resilience is nine, you said?
Yes.
Well, that does nothing to you, then.
Yes.
Ooh.
Because they all bounce off of you.
Imagine us.
Um.
We're getting shot at, or whatever.
The pillar's exploding just all around him with all the shots.
He looks over at, uh, at Alden.
You're like, sir, I don't fucking want this.
Why did they always shoot at me?
Luckily, because we're the largest target.
Now, stay strong and stay hard.
Oh, oh, oh, oh.
It's just like this, like.
I don't want to get to it.
Stay hard.
I don't want to say that to you ever again.
You've been, you've had some really good ones.
You don't have to tell me twice, Captain.
Don't worry.
Yeah, you've had some, uh.
I'm mostly metal.
Ha, ha, ha.
You know, sometimes I fire on all cylinders, and sometimes I point all cylinders at my own fucking head.
No!
Who would like to go next to the Remington retirement plan?
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
I need a water.
Help me.
My vision is blurring.
I need a medic bag.
I need a Wawa.
I need a Remington.
All right.
Hulky, you want to take it, or shall I?
If, let me, let me, let me do it.
I'll mark the target.
I believe in you.
Thank you.
Loisus is going to move up to another pillar to get to cover, and he is going to attempt to mark, please, that one, because that one looks scary.
Yes.
Ah, I'm going to attempt to identify weakness.
Okay.
Let me make a scholar check.
What difficulty would this be, Thirsten?
What does it say in the ability, typically?
In the ability.
Fuck.
Yes?
Oh, no, it's just, I have to check and see.
I think it's dependent upon if it's an elite or adversary.
Yeah, so this is your identifying weakness.
We'll get this right one day, chat.
We swear.
One of these.
Yeah, the difficulty is usually three, but I think it's, I think in this case it's going to be good, but it's actually going to be opposed by the targets.
Let's see, it could be their insight or their deception.
So this will actually be a difficulty three test.
Okay.
Here you go.
Oh, that's a bunch.
Oh, very good.
You got yourself a glory.
You get glory for the pool and a little glory there for everybody.
Wow.
Glow glory.
And then, and then, yeah, you, you may now inflict plus one.
One additional, uh, like, um, plus double rank.
Oh, double rank.
So plus two extra damage.
Dice, dice, extra damage, dice.
Here you go.
When you attack.
Ah, so this one, this one's a, I think, Dracari succubus.
That's what it is.
Let's see one of those in the outside of our book.
Uh, make sure to shoot for center of mass.
It's, it's deceptively simple.
Right.
Bruce is still getting suppressed by the ball.
I'm trying, sir.
You're doing a good job, Bruce.
Just keep not dying.
And that'll be my turn.
Because it's kind of an action.
You're not able to move in the action, in cover, or?
Uh, it looks like you did.
Yeah, I moved up.
Oh, you did.
Okay, okay, it's Kamerana.
Sorry.
Because I have to zoom so far out due to the distances.
It's hard to see what's what.
Please change the map.
Please don't change the map.
Zoran beats me.
Um.
You always make it vertical.
I do.
We are in a horizontal plane.
I can't zoom any closer.
It seems like a you problem, boss.
It's physics.
You know, you know, that's true.
That's true.
I...
I'm gonna have, uh, these two charge you.
No!
Uh-oh.
The Suck You mob charges you.
But that would, you know, pass some threatened spaces.
Can I get, like, a little, you know,
little reflexive, reflective action?
Um.
Okay, again, mobs are weird this way.
Like, this is just general placement.
Like, if I want to, I can be like this.
I'm not being super tactical.
They're rushing in your front.
Two of them can get in your front without triggering.
You war gamer.
We're playing Warhammer, man.
Attacking you with the arcade glaive.
This game is practically trying to be kill team with a story.
It's okay.
Depending on what edition it is,
a witch and a succubus can either do nothing
or kill everyone on the planet by themselves.
Yeah, it's whatever designer cared that day.
Yes.
Yes.
They were one of the best units
in the entirety of 9th edition.
I remember.
Suck you by oscillate between being able to
solo an entire squad of Wolfguard
to being soloed by a single Katachin commander.
Correct.
I'm gonna click this button here
and we'll let you be the determination
of what rules set this is.
It's coming at you with the arcade glaive.
It's fine.
She doesn't have the whip that has all of the popping sixes.
We're good.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Are we using the supplement
for the Cult of Strife, Thirsty?
I don't...
Get that Cult of Strife shit out of here.
Yeah.
Well...
I don't know who played Colt.
Oh my god!
It hits you.
It's for nine, yep.
Howie.
Three shifts.
I don't know why then...
It's possible zero.
Well, you didn't target me.
Yeah, you didn't target me, so that's why.
No, I did...
I do have you targeted.
Okay, this one's...
No, you don't.
You have it targeted.
No, no.
That's not me.
I'm changing my targets.
I'm your targeted.
I'm gonna re-roll an attack here
just to make sure.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You see, we're crazy.
There you go.
Okay, that's weird.
For some reason, you're targeted on mine,
so it's done this a few times
and it's weird.
Anywho.
So, I'm gonna do a, like,
the roll before, which would have had...
Oh yeah, you're fine.
Three shifts.
Your defense three, yeah.
So, I'd have three shifts,
so I'm just gonna add three to the damage.
I'm not gonna do the math up here.
Okay.
All right, so you're gonna take
17 points of damage at AP2.
Oh my god.
Oof.
I don't wanna die.
That was the Sam Sight locking onto Roos.
All right, so...
14, 18, minus 2s.
I have resilience of 9,
you know, 8, 7,
then plus all the other garbage.
Yeah, so that'll practically be 7 damage.
I now have to, like, tank.
So, determination.
Yeah, you can do determination, yep.
I'll be taking 7,
so I need to try to tank all of those.
Wish me well, everyone!
Ho-ho!
Yay!
Okay, not bad.
Could be worse.
Okay, I feel I can do better.
I feel I can do better.
Okay, go back.
I'm gonna wrath that.
Yeah, I need to tank this as much as possible,
so I am going to wrath these two.
So, I'm gonna re-roll those.
And boom, baby!
Oh!
Nice!
I'll still take a wound,
but 6 shock.
So, I get capped on shock on that one,
and I'll still take a wound.
And now...
It's still not good,
but it's way better than it would have been before.
So...
But thankfully,
for Roos,
I don't have to worry about being wounded,
because I have the thing called...
Sorry, I'm maintaining all the stream stuff.
Basically...
Let's see.
Pain centers...
Yeah, I feel no pain.
Your pain tolerance is above,
beyond that of your speech.
You do not suffer the penalty to DN for being wounded.
So, I don't have...
I do not suffer any penalties for being wounded.
You do not suffer the minus one for being wounded.
However...
You do suffer the poisoned condition right now.
It's starting to turn into every game.
You always target me.
You...
You fucker!
You rat fucker!
Zorah's like,
I'm gonna make the tanky character
who can protect everyone and be great.
And then I'm like,
Alright, Zorah.
Why are you hitting me?
Why are you hitting me?
Why are you hitting me?
Why are you hitting me?
Why are you hitting me?
While you're poisoned,
you suffer a plus two difficulty.
Just draw power from Painthirst,
and just draw power from Bane.
Okay, give me that poison.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
You're gonna hate this.
It's...
You're poisoned.
So that means the difficulty of all your tests
go up by two.
Okay.
So someone has to medicate test you
to get the poison off of you.
Um,
then...
You also trigger,
as Speaker just pointed out,
the power by Pain of the Succubus.
Oh.
Oh shit.
Okay, there you go.
Which means if they deal...
If this threat deals a wound,
they will get plus three
to their weapon skill
until the end of their next turn.
Yeah, somebody gotta get that, Succubus.
I would like to remind you
that the Succubus rolled ten dice
on attacking this round.
They're gonna hit me every time.
All right.
Now that I've got to enjoy
my one little moment here,
um...
Odo, your go.
Yeah.
Um...
Well...
Yas.
Yas.
Yas.
Yas.
Yas.
I could either try to dump damage
into the Succubus
or try to incapacitate
the, uh, uh,
shooting mob
because I've got a flashbang
to blind them.
But that Succubus is fucking scary.
Get that fucking HQ choice.
All right.
Then, yeah.
In that case,
I am going to open my turn
with a, uh, uh, uh,
I'm gonna quickly duck
behind the pillar here.
Uh, I'm going to just...
Hi, Aloysus.
Just give me a...
Give me a second.
Yeah.
Uh, yeah.
I'm gonna hit Roos with a dull pain.
Uh, so target him.
Dull pain.
Rolling it.
I'll make a lot of it right now.
Uh, well, it's dulled now.
I'm dulling your pain.
You have one shift to do,
so you can click on one of those die
and do apply to potency.
Uh...
Let's see.
Uh, it's not giving me the...
Yeah, click it
and then right click.
Yeah, shit.
Sometimes you might have to scroll down
because it pushes it down weirdly.
Shock reduced by a four...
by a one
and then apply dull pain
and that should apply it to you.
Awesome.
Thank you.
Yes.
Did that go through?
Okay, sick.
Yeah.
Uh, and then
I'm going to smite
this witch.
Uh, the succubus.
Witches get stitches.
Boom.
Uh, one shift possible,
so that doesn't quite give me anything.
Besides, I will, uh, convert that to a glory.
A glory?
A glory.
A glory.
Okay, so...
Oh, wait.
Roll damage.
Oh, wait, no.
Uh, if I keep that...
Sorry, remind me again.
Um, if I shift that,
that isn't factored into my damage, right?
No, because you need three shifts
to up this damage,
so it's really hard to up mortal wound damage.
Yeah.
So just, yeah,
you could bank the glory here
and that's fine.
Yeah, I'll bank the glory.
Uh, yeah.
And then you can roll damage.
Damage.
One mortal wound.
And mortal wound's still a mortal wound.
And this is a Drukhari,
so, you know...
Well...
Yeah, and I would like to, um...
I would like to note
that this Drukhari has, um...
Lightning Dodge,
which allows them to use agility
instead of toughness to roll determination.
and can roll determination
against mortal wounds.
Ah!
Fuck her!
Ah, you fucker!
No!
She's gonna dodge my smite!
She is gonna roll
some dice here,
a couple agility dice,
46, in fact.
That's not like the war game.
Oh, I'm gonna take one shock from that.
Very nice.
Very nice.
I don't like these guys.
This one's, you know, sucks.
That will end the round.
Now we are in the next round of combat.
Like Grey Knight Paladins.
Hey,
do you guys mind if I start this round?
Go for it.
Go for it.
All right.
Go.
Odoroshi has just proven
that we are not playing
by the tabletop rules.
But there is,
as a long-time Dark Eldar main,
I know that there is one weapon
especially good at killing Dark Eldar.
The humble Laz Gun!
And I've got, like,
four of them taped together.
Gonna reload?
Your last ammo.
Here we go.
My last ammo?
Target this succubus?
Mm-hmm.
Tell me how this tastes,
you son of a bitch!
Full auto.
Everything into this
motherfucker right here.
Okay.
That is how you deal with Dark Eldar.
You just,
you just kind of dump everything.
So there's a solo...
For the range, let's see.
Licking.
Oh, short range,
it's plus two, I believe.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Plus two to your thing.
So,
this is a short range.
Do we have any glory at all?
We have two.
Okay.
I may use some of it
at some point.
Yeah.
Fire once,
see what you get.
You also got a wrath,
thanks to the chat,
so you can re-roll.
Oh, lovely.
And then after that,
spend some glory.
All right.
Let's rock.
Here we go.
So that's seven successes.
Nice.
Very good.
The shift.
Very good.
All right.
Now, I just gotta,
I'm so sorry,
it's been a while
since we played.
Full auto,
that gives me,
I have solo four,
that gives me
how many extra dice
for damage?
So,
it doesn't give you
any damage,
it gives you
two extra attack dice.
Oh,
oh,
well let me roll
two extra attack then
because I failed to.
Yeah.
A mistake.
A two and a one,
so nothing.
So nothing.
So,
so at this point,
you can,
um,
shift one
for damage.
Okay.
Um,
so you can then,
if you click on the six
and then,
um,
click,
click on it,
right click,
and then shift plus damage,
uh,
you can shift,
you know,
move one of those sixes
to be extra damage.
Now,
you could
also spend a wrath
to try to re-roll
like the one
and the two,
um,
but you actually know
you did the glory already,
so no,
never mind.
I'd rather,
I'd rather keep my wrath
for,
um,
all right.
Damage.
Okay.
So it's going to be
11 damage
at AP minus two.
Not bad.
So I'm going to
come in here.
Oh God,
it's loud.
Yeah.
What's loud?
What,
huh?
No,
I'm trying to add effects
right when we kind of
do stuff
and start narratively doing it
and one of them
just went,
even though the sound volume
was at like 0.1%.
Thanks,
Tabletop Auto.
Okay.
Okay.
So.
Don't I get the,
uh,
salvo and bonus dice?
Full auto.
You make full auto attack
to gain a number
of bonus dice
to your attack
equal to the weapon
salvo value
to the attack.
Ah.
Cause you can shift
attack to damage.
That's how you increase.
Ah,
okay.
Okay.
My bad.
My bad.
My bad.
Um,
all right.
Well,
I'm going to,
um,
uh,
roll determination again.
See what I get.
See what I get here.
I'm gonna spend a,
spend a,
spend a rune point here,
um,
to reroll
some of that determination.
Just the two
that I failed.
Very good.
Very good.
Very good.
Okay.
I'm just gonna,
all right.
She's alive.
Barely.
Not looking good.
Roast,
finish her off.
Anyone finish her off.
I would like to seize.
Did,
did you get an extra glory
in between things?
Did you spend two glory?
You did.
Okay.
No,
he didn't.
He did.
Oh,
no,
you didn't.
Yeah,
you didn't.
That's right.
That's right.
You didn't.
So yeah,
you can seize.
You're right.
Yes.
Sorry.
I forgot the two was for the salvo.
My bad.
I thought it was glory.
Yeah.
If I remember,
I don't think you'd spend any glory.
No,
that's true.
Nope.
Nope.
Very good.
Yeah.
Roast will seize,
look upon the succubus.
Yes.
And then stab the shit out of her.
All right,
here we go.
Yeah.
And I would like to basically do a,
let's see,
just to make sure.
All that attack.
Let's see.
Yeah.
Screw it.
I'm going to attack with it.
I'm going to get a plus two bonus dies to my melee attack pool.
Okay.
All that attack on this one.
So we're going to add just a little two bonus die there.
And he attacks it like,
I'm going to get in and stabs it to her with his bayonet.
Jesus.
Successes with a crit with three shifts possible.
So I'm going to add all of those for some,
add those in for damage because they can keep resisting a whole bunch of stuff.
Uh,
I'm going to go ahead and roll the domiage,
which is going to be 12 plus,
I feel like you didn't apply it correctly.
Uh,
12 plus AP minus one.
And for the crit,
that's going to be a rolled one in the die for headshot,
just right through the head.
Just get them there.
That'll be one,
uh,
wound and they are staggered if they are still alive.
They are dead.
They are both.
Eviscerated into little meaty chunks.
Pretty much Roos is just stabs into him and just draw.
I assume the other one dies too.
Cause it's a bob.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And then basically he's a stabs into the other one.
He grabs the other one and just go,
Oh,
turn it.
Shut it.
And he was just taking his head and slamming it against the pillar.
And as his head is now just like turned into goo,
he drops the corpse,
looks back and goes,
got to do a good job,
sir.
You've done an excellent job.
Now keep it up.
There's plenty more aliens left to kill.
You got it,
sir.
And,
uh,
he'll,
he'll turn around also.
Um,
Bruce,
I'm going to give you your wish.
Say what?
I'm going to give you your wish.
Yeah.
Not going to shoot you.
Okay.
Going to shoot the good captain.
Now that's not my wish.
Stop.
Give me one.
I didn't even make a wish.
Stop.
Just one sec.
What's your defense there?
Uh,
Oh,
captain,
my captain.
I'm,
uh,
I'm getting the feeling we're going to have to send you to the negative
zone.
Uh,
my defense is for cool.
I am in cover.
Question.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You are.
You are for sure.
For sure.
For sure.
Peace in our time.
How about going to be?
I'm going to give you that.
Okay.
There's going to be that.
Three bonus dice.
Good.
Aim and a whole bunch more fire.
Oh,
I will hit you.
Yeah.
Barely hits.
One sec.
I have to see the overlay here.
Oh,
I've got a lot of runes still.
I mean,
you know what?
Uh-oh.
I'm just going to use a rune point here.
By all means,
please feel free.
Uh-oh.
It's,
uh,
it's okay.
It doesn't give me any more shifts though.
So that's,
but I can at least take two of them and shift for damage.
People listen to audio.
What's,
what's the numbers and stuff?
All right.
So I got six successes,
um,
and then two shifts into damage,
which is going right into the good captain.
I will inflict eight damage on the captain.
Now podcast listeners.
I got you.
Yeah,
he does.
I have got a resilience of seven.
So you take one damage.
I take one.
You can determination it if you wish.
I wish it.
All right.
Do it.
Well,
I don't wish it that hard.
Yeah.
So you take one wound unless you want to.
I think I will.
Cause I want to avoid being poisoned.
That's fair.
All right.
So I will spend my wrath,
reroll my determination.
It says I don't have any wrath,
but I do.
You have to add it to your character sheet.
Yes.
I'm stupid.
Okay.
Let's go.
I believe in you.
Yeah.
You got this.
You got this.
Just barely.
I assume the,
the,
the line of shore is just up down the pillar.
It just inches away from my head.
Yeah.
Like goes into your coat.
You take one point of shock because they clearly ruined your cool coat.
You damn cretins.
Not a single one of them lives.
Oh,
sorry.
They are,
they are hissing in sibilant Eldari tones,
swearing at you.
Oh,
it can't be helped.
Kelly.
I really can't.
Oh,
well,
more meat for the grinder.
What do I do,
sir?
Bruce looks to hold in for orders.
Kill them.
Kill them all.
How do I kill them,
sir?
Well,
just,
I'm sure you can get creative.
Gun.
He thinks.
Who's going?
Hulkier Odo saved me.
Uh,
I will go ahead and go.
Uh,
unless you have a strong idea.
I,
I'm going to flashbang these guys.
No,
I think that's going to be for the best.
All right.
Um,
can I,
Ooh,
I know we're kind of in a theater of the mind distances.
Flashbang is range of five meters.
You're not that close.
You'd have to like,
you'd have to like double move to get up that close.
Ooh,
sad,
sad.
All right.
Uh,
in that case,
I am just going to,
uh,
drop a conceal on myself and my friends.
Um,
and just make it even harder for them to try to hit us.
All right.
Summon a bloodthirster.
I knew it.
Uh,
okay.
That is going to be seven successes.
One possible shift,
but,
uh,
nothing to spend it on.
Nothing to spend it on.
So I'll have to shift.
Uh,
no,
I can't actually spend it on anything.
So just,
uh,
a normal style.
So I'm applying concealed on myself.
Uh,
and so,
uh,
uh,
my friends are within five meters of me,
correct?
Yeah.
Okay.
Then yeah,
everybody's got,
uh,
uh,
Concealed.
Concealed.
Concealed.
We'll see.
We'll see if it matters.
Yeah.
You will add plus one bonus to your defense and plus one bonus to any stealth tests you make.
We're concealed.
Don't feel.
Oh,
Kikro.
Oh,
Kikro.
Yeah.
Uh,
Kikro.
Hi,
Thurston.
Uh,
Kikro.
Hi.
Oh,
Kikro.
Yes.
What are you doing?
Uh,
Kikro.
I'm going to target myself and I'm going to shoot my leg off with my arc pistol.
Oh,
hell yeah.
I think I need it.
I need a strategic disadvantage.
Yeah.
The old alpha booster tactic.
It worked.
It worked though.
It worked.
You need to give the enemy a chance.
Yeah.
Oh God.
I don't have the range for this.
Team.
Oh,
quickly get a quick measure out here.
Ruler.
Uh,
Kikro.
Beg.
Beg.
Uh,
we're going to move up.
No,
that's,
that's me.
That's,
there we go.
I can't be behind this pillar because it's in between two spaces.
No,
you can go left one.
He just has the pillow a little bit to the right there.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
Uh,
I'm going to take a mega pillar,
the greatest of all pillars.
Actually,
you know what?
Uh,
seeing how Roos,
you did such a good job at taking all that fire.
I'm not.
It's a great idea.
Fuck that.
I'm not going to be perforated by six dark Eldar.
Uh,
I'm going to take a pot shot at this one.
The mob.
It's a mob.
Oh,
it's a mob.
It's a mob.
Uh,
I'm going to draw the arc pistol and I will fire it.
All right,
do it up.
Here we go.
Arc pistol.
Nope.
It's also a complication.
I'm going to use my funny oil to not complicate here.
Okay.
There we go.
There we go.
Are you going to wrath to try to hit?
I'm going to wrath to try and contribute to the combat encounter.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
All right,
roll.
Literally nothing.
Nothing.
No.
Shit all is going to happen this time.
Wow.
Okay.
I helped once.
I got,
I got twos and threes and one and one four for one success and re-rolled and I got two,
two and one.
Oh,
do we,
do we all think,
and I just want to like,
maybe like,
like,
can we,
can we take like a side huddle here?
Um,
do we think that a hulky crow is just cursed at wrath and glory?
Like,
is that,
is that the thing?
Everybody has to have at least one game that they are just deeply cursed at rolling with.
Thurston,
I,
I made a character even less suited for combat than Zedek.
Zedek can hold his own.
Aloysius doesn't really fight.
Yeah,
Aloysius is specced in the status of the Inquisition.
That's it.
My face is my shield.
Also this icon that says I can do what I want.
It's true.
It's true.
All right.
All right.
Next round.
Next round.
Who wants to go first?
Bruce looks back at the party and says,
let me do it,
boss.
I believe in you,
bud.
Do it,
big man.
You can.
Zoran's just like,
please let me end this.
Please.
Oh,
goodness gracious.
Very well.
I throw my hotshot volley gun down on the ground.
It is useless.
I draw my power sword.
I'm going to get up there for the Imperial Navy for the charter's captains for the Imperial.
But I'm going to run as fast as I can over there.
I like,
okay.
I like that.
Zoran's just like,
can I,
can I,
can I,
and you're like,
I'm going to take the action and run up.
So for charging,
it's,
it's double your movement.
So what's your movement?
Oh,
fuck.
There's only one way to find out.
Thank you.
Thank you,
speaker.
Thank you so much.
This is the most fucking speaker moment ever.
Like we haven't even gone past the fucking fact that Zoran was like,
can I,
can I throw one last grenade and then this,
and you're like,
Oh,
I was going to,
I'm just going to leave Roy.
Oh,
you were going to charge him.
I thought you were going to just throw a fucking grenade.
Why not?
My speed is five.
Yeah.
So you're going to go up to 10.
I don't want to figure that out with Thurston.
Well,
but I didn't know that this was a real,
like,
is this real scale where they're at?
Yes.
Roughly.
Like the,
the distances are enough.
It's theater of the mindy aside.
Like there,
there are,
as I mentioned,
kind of stairs leading up like here and here,
here.
Draw you little stairs.
So double moving gets you to there.
That's a great place to stand.
Definitely is a power move.
Well,
gentlemen,
I hope you appreciate your last seconds of life.
From where you're standing,
I must seem terribly out of position.
Indeed.
What could this Monkai possibly be doing?
I shall tell you,
distracting you from the ogre that's about to charge from behind and rip your skulls in twain.
He probably shouldn't have told him that.
I'd like to make a,
uh,
interact action,
um,
with perhaps persuasion on this mob to perhaps intimidate them.
Trying to use them.
I like that.
You're like persuasion to intimidate when there is.
Can I,
can I,
no,
no,
no,
no,
no,
no.
I'm having a moment here.
Speaker D I,
I appreciate that.
Whatever fucking campaign I am in.
You're like,
what's my highest skill.
I will use that to do the opposite thing.
Rock ride speaker will be like,
can I use intimidation to have like a discussion with this person?
This game.
It's like,
he finally has fucking persuasion.
He can finally do the talking and he's like,
I wish to use my persuasion to intimidate.
Scare.
I can't fucking win.
Perhaps my cunning.
Perhaps my cunning.
I will allow cunning.
Okay.
Thank you.
Um,
what's my difficulty number?
Uh,
so this is going to be against the,
uh,
in this case,
I'll say conviction.
So three.
Okie dokie.
Oh no.
Oh no.
Tell me about that.
What happened?
Oh no.
Hey speaker,
wanna,
I'd like to spend,
uh,
how much glue do we have?
Okay.
Uh,
I'm spending it to interrupt after you.
So how much do we,
well,
technically we would have one.
And then after I cannot help you,
you spend it.
You have a wrath.
You have a wrath.
Yeah.
You can wrath it first.
Why didn't you say that in the first place?
I'll of course wrath.
I had the webcam thing.
You can see what the overlay is.
You don't have to see stream.
That's much better.
That's seven successes with a shift possible and a complication,
which I shall now roll.
Mm-hmm.
Warp interference.
The chaos gods are watching.
Oh no.
Isn't that the complication I'm supposed to be getting?
Huh?
Huh?
Wait,
wait,
wait,
wait,
wait,
hold on.
Wait,
hold on.
Wait,
wait,
wait,
wait,
wait.
Okay.
Yeah.
Interesting.
There are a lot of Eldar in this room.
I can only imagine what ruinous power is watching.
Okay.
A supernatural mishap.
Hmm.
Huh.
You know,
a lot of this plan relies on something to follow.
You know,
I think,
I think it might just be a supernatural,
um,
event that,
um,
Roos' stone starts crying.
So you're,
you go up there and you're fucking ready.
Cause you know,
Roos is behind you and Roos is behind cover.
The stone starts crying.
Roos.
Oh,
it's all.
Oh,
it's all.
I mean,
you think I'm going to survive this charge,
right?
Right?
No.
I am confident.
It is now.
Roos grips the stone.
It goes,
sir,
my friends are out there.
Come on.
You gotta let me charge.
Oh.
But come on,
sir.
Well,
you know what?
I can't fucking believe that the fucking machine was against you.
twice.
Roos.
Let's see how it pans out.
Holy shit.
Let's see how that was.
Because it's 10.
He gets it to the middle of them.
And he's like,
I got you,
son.
He just,
like,
piles into the middle of them.
Remember,
they're elevated.
So you could just go up the stairs here.
I don't know what your stairs are or what.
So I'm just.
Yeah.
Okay.
Fine.
Fine.
Fine.
Fine.
Fine.
You rush into the middle of them up the stairs.
You're good.
You're good.
You're good.
Okay.
Again.
All right.
He rushes up there.
Ripper gun firing.
He's now going to take this.
And with the charge,
I get pushed with my bonus die.
And I think I'll forget something extra for being an ogren.
Let's see.
To the avalanche.
Also,
when you charge,
you get an additional plus rank bonus die to your melee attack.
I think just one more die for us.
I think.
Yep.
So we're going to add just one more of those.
He's like,
I forgot the target.
Hold up.
Ignore that roll.
All right.
Actually,
no,
it's D and four,
right?
I think for them.
No,
I did it.
I did it,
right?
Yeah,
it's three.
It's three.
Yep.
Yeah,
I did it right.
And I'm poisoned and shit.
So it'll do all the stuff.
Yeah.
With two shifts possible.
So I want to apply that to some damage Roonies.
I'm going to roll damage.
That's 11 damage.
AP minus one.
Okay.
Can I,
uh,
how many successes did you have,
uh,
for shifts?
Uh,
you got four successes.
Um,
I'm actually going to make another suggestion here.
Yeah.
Uh,
if you take those shifts and you don't shift,
you're going to get,
uh,
four more successes.
Um,
so you're going to be at that point five over,
uh,
for everything over icons against mobs,
you hit another guy.
Oh,
so if you don't shift them,
you hit everyone.
Oh,
okay.
I'll do that then.
Uh,
do you want me to reroll damage or?
Uh,
you don't have to,
we can just subtract the two.
Cause it's just two.
So it'll be nine AP minus one.
Um,
their,
their resilience is six.
You,
you kill them all.
I basically come in and Alden,
I guess.
And I'm like,
Oh,
I got your son.
He's like dives in there.
The ripper guns firing.
And he just,
he just bay blades it.
Uh,
Alden has never been so certain that he was about to be shot.
So he's just like,
great.
Going loose.
Excuse me.
He's just,
he's all covered in Zeno's blood and everything else.
And he turns back and gives a toothy thumbs up.
He's like,
I got him balls.
You certainly did.
Oh my goodness.
What are we going to do?
I don't.
I thought he was going to leave me.
Well,
of course he wouldn't.
Look at him.
He's a great friend.
Roos,
you're a great friend,
right?
Oh,
he shoots one of the guys down the ground.
He's trying to reach up at him.
Huh?
I'll protect my son.
Exactly.
See,
he protects his son.
Dear captain,
you cannot program that kind of loyalty.
That's something that a barn bred Imperial soldier has made into them.
Well,
I'll be sure to convey your compliments to flesh to the local agri workers.
I reached down.
I grabbed the archite glaive,
but gave Roos such an horrible smashing.
Just examining it.
Oh,
can I see?
Oh,
may I?
I get the feeling that if I relinquish this to either of you,
I won't see it again.
Oh,
I mean,
finders keepers.
If you're going to take it,
I can't stop you.
Well,
if you can at least tell me what the hell it does,
that would be a boon.
I tossed it over.
Can I imagine Calron and Aloysius fighting like animals starred for good loot?
Correct.
Just like punching each other.
No,
no,
give it to me.
I've always wanted to hold one.
I've wanted to hold one too.
I want to take it apart and use it to kill somebody else.
Ah,
wait,
hold on.
We can,
we can,
we can sell this the old fashioned way.
There's an old,
uh,
imperial conflict resolution technique.
Here,
put out your hands.
We're going to do this Rochambeau.
Rochambeau.
So you,
it,
we're playing rock,
paper,
scissors.
You can't play Rochambeau.
The rules are different every time.
Yes,
we can.
She doesn't know that.
So you make one of these three hand gestures.
This rock beats scissors.
Scissors beats paper.
Paper beats rock.
And we do it at random.
And whoever wins gets the pain glove.
What pain?
It's clave.
It's a big spear.
It's not clave.
Clave,
clave.
It's only a few letters different.
Shut up.
You don't know this technology.
I do.
That is,
that is one of the errors of binary being your first language.
You get confused between clave.
and gloves.
All right.
All right.
All right.
Fine.
All right.
All right.
Are we doing it on three or on shoot?
You want to,
if you want to make it game wise in,
we'll do this.
One is rock.
Two.
Scissors.
And three is paper.
Vellum.
Yeah.
So,
all of you like to,
like to slash roll one D three and we'll see who wins.
Okay.
Yes.
I'm going to be real.
I was waiting whether or not I should just outright be a dick and just take it.
I'm going to be an option.
Yeah.
I don't need to be this evil yet.
I like Kelrana.
Kelrana is cool.
For now.
Paper.
Damn it.
Yeah.
Fine.
Fine.
Fine.
Fine.
Fine.
Yes.
It always wins.
The cutting edge cuts the best.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Aloysius will pick up his new prize.
It is,
it is an archaic glaive.
It is,
it deals strength plus six damage with four extra dice and AP three.
But the unwieldy trait.
Ah,
as we're doing this Thursday,
I have a question.
Yes.
Remind me again,
how many wrath it takes to make a narrative declaration.
One.
Okay.
I would like to make a narrative declaration.
Exactly.
One.
Cabalite has survived the assault.
Just barely.
Okay.
And,
uh,
I believe that,
um,
you know,
you'll,
you'll,
you'll see like a,
uh,
uh,
partially removed helmet and a little bit of,
of,
of blue hair.
Um,
and that will be our,
our soul living.
Cabalite.
Interesting that you specified blue hair.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Very interesting.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Um,
this blue haired Cabalite,
um,
clearly sneaks off pulling themselves into the darkness with a,
with a wide smile.
It was,
it was,
that was a gender neutral descriptor.
I mean,
we don't really know what this,
uh,
Cabalite's gender is with that.
It's true.
I know it could be anyone really.
Yeah.
That's so mysterious.
That really makes one thing.
Yeah.
Really?
Really?
It really,
really makes you think.
Okay.
Thurston,
how much,
how much money can we get on the black market for selling all of these
fucking splinter rifles?
Yeah.
I,
I,
I,
I'll give you,
I'll give you some appropriate wealth upgrades between adventures.
I gotta,
I gotta,
I gotta make contact with my guys in the coal market.
Okay.
That's right.
You do.
Well then I must say,
despite the incredibly unorthodox means of which we achieved victory,
this is the cleanest triumph we have ever seen against the forces of the
Drukhari.
Not a one of us maimed or murdered.
Roost is still poisoned.
I'm still hurting.
Oh,
you're walking off.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Let me,
let me,
let me.
Yeah.
I'll help.
Yes,
but she's not,
I forgot about Roost.
Ah,
the affable and never poisoned Roost.
All right.
Oh,
my,
my Medicaid rating is six.
Mine is eight.
All right.
Then you don't know this.
Yes,
it is,
buddy.
Here you go.
That many.
With intellect.
For an extra two.
I like my pentacle configuration.
I'm getting lots of weird,
like,
casually pleasing dice configurations.
They're trying to apologize for the terrible early role.
You mecha dendrites suck all of the poison out.
Uh,
even,
even,
even with,
uh,
that success,
it's enough for the shifts for you to even collect a little bit of it.
Not enough to like,
directly poison a weapon or the like,
but enough for you to,
to have access to study it.
Should you,
should you design it?
Oh,
I certainly would love to study it.
Yeah.
Thank you for a much minute now.
Now that we killed all the dog out all year,
what else we supposed to do?
I mean,
we killed them all.
We can tell that other wolves they know,
study can get out for our planet.
And,
uh,
maybe get our food and go home.
Right.
Well,
are we going to be able to immediately get food?
They're still recovering.
We damn well better.
Fair enough.
I've not got some rinky dink frigate floating up out there.
I have a crew to feed.
The same crew that is currently eating the crew from the last three jumps.
No,
that is not what my crew is doing.
They're not eating each other.
Perhaps in the lower decks,
but there's the same people that carry the torpedoes.
They're barely human.
Jesus.
Mankind's internal solidarity is a thing of beauty.
At least you're not pulling elevators.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Oh,
not that there's anything wrong with that.
Roos just looks away like,
yeah.
I appreciate that.
It's Roos who brings back the elevator commentary of this adventure.
It's all about elevators.
It all comes back to the elevators.
Roos helps collect any weapons and things that the team wants.
And,
uh,
you know,
find some way to carry it all.
And,
uh,
yeah,
I think we're done.
If we go back to the Xenos guy below.
Yeah.
Kelron is going to,
uh,
do her best to gather up the,
uh,
what remains of the head of the succubus.
Just to prove that we got rid of them.
Okay.
Okay.
Yep.
And then,
uh,
should we give this room one,
one last glance over,
over just to see if they left anything?
Yeah.
Spare as it couldn't hurt.
All right.
You can look around.
I'll hold this.
And he holds the piles of loot.
I just,
I just want to assume that like,
Kelrana is like looking around like,
oh,
we should like look around for any priceless things.
And then like,
clearly it's just like Roos and Alden and Aloysus who are throwing like precious Eldar statues and things like this is trash.
Fucking bullshit.
Just Kelrana's like watching the death of history unfold in front of her.
Yes.
Well,
actually Thurston,
hold on.
You're loving me in with these dullards.
Aloysus sees all of these statues here.
not as it's like worthless garbage.
Like most of Eldari culture tends to be.
No,
these are things that can be broken down,
studied,
sold,
and then weaponized.
Your culture is our next crusade.
Oh,
you let me keep some of that.
Hmm.
Fine.
You got the clave.
I,
yeah,
it's true.
It's a little bit big,
don't you think I could,
well,
I could make this passably,
make an extra special funny tentacle for it.
You know,
if all you're going to do is turn it into a tentacle,
I would quite like it.
I'm not going to turn it into a tentacle.
I was going to study it and then slap some more wires,
make it passably appropriated in the eyes of the lighter Imperium.
Those who lack the vision to see anyway.
Rah.
If I can't figure it out,
yes,
you can have it back,
Captain,
or you can have it,
Kelrana.
I don't know if you can make more use of it than I can.
I'm not entirely sure it can be wielded by anything but the delicate hands of a wonderful,
wonderful Eldari,
but,
you know.
Goodness,
you're giving me gas now with all this self-aggrandizement.
I can help you with that if you're having gas.
We can remove that part of you.
Thank you.
But this thing,
we're going to replace it with a furnace that will allow you to smoke twice as many cigars.
No Aloysius was going to turn into the fucking Ripper Dock and then come on and screaming at Alden like,
please,
no more upgrades.
Alden looks like he's about to say,
what are you?
And then,
oh,
wait,
that does sound nice.
He's actually thinking about it.
Just turns around.
Three scenes later,
Alden Raj has a fucking kebab machine in his chest.
From the moment I first understood the weakness of my mini fridge,
it disgusted me.
What?
My accessories held me back.
I've heard of a chest freezer,
but this is ridiculous.
I'm like fucking Frankie.
Just open up my chest.
Bro.
He just gets bigger and bigger.
All right.
Yeah,
I'm going to give the room a once over to see if we missed any items or special things.
No,
you collect all the weapons and,
and,
you know,
reasonable wealth options.
From here,
there are some precious,
you know,
Eldari remnants of your culture that are,
you know,
taken or destroyed as necessary.
But otherwise,
you've,
you've,
you've,
you've looted the site of your people's former glory.
Yay.
All right.
We might want to give at least some of this to our friend by the portal for appeasement purposes.
Why on earth would we do that?
For appeasement purposes.
We don't owe him anything.
All he wants to do is go back to his craft world.
He was watching the portal in case I had reinforcement.
It's an important job.
His appeasement is in us killing the dreadful Drukhari that have been keeping him here.
Captain,
if I may.
You may.
Having,
having done business with the Eldari for quite some time,
I can assure you that among their compare pairs of the sapient races of the Milky Way,
they are quite agreeable if you know how to play by their terms.
And more than anything,
they have some semblance of honor.
They may look down on us more often than not,
but a little here will pay dividends in the future.
Thank you.
Especially for someone like him.
Worst case scenario,
he's eaten by beasts in the web way,
but who knows?
You scratch our back,
we scratch yours.
Why do you think I'm hanging out with you?
That's a question I ask myself with some frequency.
Well...
It's because you like me.
We're friends.
Is it now?
Oh,
come on,
Captain.
I'm going to give him a nuggie.
Don't touch me.
Aloysius,
I will defer to your judgment in this matter.
You are by far the expert.
Just do be careful.
Of course.
If anything should go awry,
I have two of the finest guns
I've ever served with at my back.
And of course,
if they should take anything away from me,
well,
what's another Orgmetic
all the closer to godhood?
Amen.
I want to go home.
Roos leaves.
Yeah.
He starts going down.
I will follow Roos.
Soren's just like seen over.
He wants to go home and eat corn.
He wants to eat so much corn.
I want to eat cobs of corn.
Cobs of corn.
Cobs of corn.
All right.
So with this,
you depart.
On the way out,
you return to the open foyer area
where you encounter
the Eldari who is waiting.
And sort of,
they come out of the shadows
It is done then.
It's done.
Hold up the head.
Then I shall go.
I shall call some of my kin
to return here
so we can cleanse this place
before the monkey intrude further.
Excuse me?
This is our site.
We must make sure
it is not defiled
or studied further.
So you're gonna,
what,
drag this whole site
through the webway?
Sure.
Or are you talking about
a, what,
bomb in this world
or something?
No.
We shall come through here.
Controlled demolition,
as you would say.
I'm okay with that.
The Luddites outside
are not very
bright or observant.
Just give them
something to go off of.
Even
a facsimile
of a mural
or something
they can continue to worship.
They're fairly easy
to pacify,
but take whatever you need.
Just
leave the human population
intact.
Do not tell
the other metal men
of this place.
They will come.
They always come.
My word is my bond.
As long as your things
are removed,
they'll have no reason
to poke around.
There's, like,
the slightest nod
of, like,
not even respect,
but understanding.
Besides,
they can seldom grasp
the intricacies
of your technology.
your wedding
of spirit
and machinery
is commendable
and something
to study further.
Yes.
At this point,
the LRI
gives kind of a nod.
I will go, then.
And sort of turns
towards the strange portal
that crackles.
So he travels.
You want me to close it
behind you?
Or are you going to be
using it to get
your friends back?
Close it behind us.
We have other ways
of coming here.
Very well.
I'll roll.
Boy, have a good trip.
Turns back to you.
You should give up
the stone.
No.
He closes the portal.
Just, like,
you, like,
push him in,
just like,
hey, bye.
Yep.
Just shoves.
Can you roll me
a D6, please?
I'd like to see
if we complicate
his travel
through the webway.
Roll the one.
Perfect.
Excellent.
Love it.
It's great.
The last thing
you hear
is this Eldahari
ranger's screams
as something
goes wrong
as he's thrown
bodily into the portal
by a big,
meaty fist.
And the laughter
of thirsting gods.
Bruce's kind of
kind of goes,
oh, well,
that's another one
taking care of, sir.
Let's high five.
Close.
Well,
I won't congratulate you,
but I will high five you,
and I'll give him
a high five.
Oh,
you fuckers.
Hello,
the Eldah.
Mumbling something.
Silly.
Deeply silly.
I'm feeling so silly.
I know.
You're so silly.
You're so silly, Kelly.
We love you.
You're wonderful.
I'm so silly.
So silly.
So silly.
I'm going to close the portal
with a psychic mastery test.
All right.
All right.
Give me a psychic mastery test.
Don't fail it.
What's my DN?
Difficulty is going to be
five here.
Ah,
why did I even ask?
I just want to go
with a default of three,
but fuck it.
Ass.
You got an unbounded
of three,
you know,
just for the attempt now.
So I'm going to be even.
Just once,
we want a great unclean one.
Give us this.
Yeah,
okay.
Ooh.
Ooh.
God,
I don't really have anything
to bump that up.
I'm kind of tapped.
Do you have no wrath?
We have one glory.
There's no wrath
for Kelorana.
You could get a six.
You could get a six.
You could try for a six.
Yeah,
I feel like not closing
this thing would be bad.
Sure,
I'll try for a six.
Do it.
Do it.
Do it.
Yay!
That's a six.
Yay!
With your psychic mastery,
you connect with the
webway gateway,
deactivating the
eldritch energies
that coruscate around it.
As you psychically
commune with it,
there's only the slight
disturbance of the
revving chainsaw
from Aloysus,
but it's clear that
the chainsaw
won't be necessary,
so eventually
that noise
dissipates as you
manage to successfully
close the gateway.
All right,
I should take care of that,
and, uh,
think we're pretty
in the clear.
I'd say so.
We managed to
slaughter some
erinzinos,
steal some artifacts
for research,
satisfy the needs
of the local population.
All in all,
and plenty that I can
redact in my records later,
I would say
it's a wonderfully
successful diplomatic mission,
and that calls
for celebration,
and...
Oh, do we have
booze on this ship?
Of course we have
booze on this ship.
Good booze?
What sort of captain
doesn't provide
a high-quality
rum ration?
Uh,
I'll take it.
You're done,
wrong.
I love drinking
funny water
through a box.
Do you think
that Imperial
slavers...
slavers?
Oh my god.
Hold on,
hold on!
Different one,
different one.
Do you think
Imperial sailors
don't know how to drink?
Have a good time
at Journey's End?
Please.
Oh,
you want a party,
Captain?
Alright.
I think I can drink
under the table.
Come on!
Let's go enjoy
ourselves.
But first,
I'm pretty low,
Stogie,
I've got a couple
on me.
And with that,
our great band
returns,
where they have now
made friends
with locals.
They have created
an alliance
with the Adeptus
Mechanicus
of Avacris
through their
representatives
on this world.
I will note
this down
for all of you
to forget later,
but in the future,
you gain
a bonus,
and you can
remind me of this
at any point
when dealing
with the Mechanicus
within this system.
Yippee!
Yeah!
As that carries on,
it's time
to award you all
with experience.
Points, points, points,
points, points!
Points, points, points!
Everybody pull out
your character sheet.
Everybody whip out
that character sheet,
okay?
You got it.
All right,
let's see,
where do we got
a place to put it?
Notes, can't edit
my XP's.
It's under notes,
beautiful.
All right,
here we go.
Yay!
Here we go.
Here's your experience,
everybody.
You will,
ahem,
chat,
I'm going to need
your help
just to decide
if these work.
The first is
a three experience
reward for role
playing and having
fun.
Aww.
We're all having
fun!
Okay.
Did they all have
fun?
Do you think
they all had fun?
Okay, I guess
they had fun.
I guess we did.
Did we have fun?
Did we have fun?
We had fun.
I killed Venus.
You did.
Well, funny
you should mention
that.
Five extra
experience
for defeating
the Cabal
of the Bloodied
Hand.
Oh my goodness.
Nice!
Thanks for five.
Okay, so
eight so far?
Yeah.
Next up,
three more
experience
for discovering
the betrayal
of Xanthor Vuda.
Doesn't say
he has to survive.
He discovered
that betrayal.
Yay!
He definitely did.
All right.
Another two
experience
for defeating
the clawed
fiend.
Wahoo.
Nice.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
13.
Yeah, all right.
All right.
This following
one is not
happening.
For preventing
the deaths
of laborers
and children
of the Don
when possible,
you murdered
some children
of the Don.
That's okay.
It's okay.
It's okay.
We go.
But you do
get two experience
for ending
the conflict
between the
Adeptus Mechanicus
and the Ecclesiarchy
in the world.
Yay!
solid 15.
Okay, okay, okay.
And then
one experience
for going
to the following
locations,
the Cathedral,
the Sortium
Compound,
and Outpost
Polaris,
giving you
a grand total
of 18
experience.
Yay!
Good job,
good job!
Good job,
good job.
I can't get
into psychic power.
Good job.
Very good,
very good.
And with that,
the ship,
the ship
is restocked.
However,
as it is being
restocked,
an emergency
dispatch comes in.
And we will
discuss it
in our next
episode,
but
the monastery
of Hephaestium's
rest
in this system,
something
has happened.
Something
has gone
wrong.
And they
require an
object from
this monastery,
the thighbone
of St. Hephaestium.
And we will
talk more
about that
in the
second adventure
of Litanies
of the Lost,
because that
is the end
of the first
adventure,
everybody.
That was
Grim Harvest.
Good job.
Good job.
Good job.
Yay!
The next
episode,
entitled
Vow of Silence,
buckle up,
because I wrote
that one,
so get ready.
Also,
it has a
very highly
detailed
tactical map,
so Zoran
can be happy.
Fucking
final.
Yay!
You suck
some sucka,
dude.
I like
knowing where
the fuck
my guys are at.
Thanks,
everybody.
I know it was
again a shorter
episode today,
but we were
kind of near
the end,
and I don't
want to jump
into the next
adventure just
yet,
but yeah.
We did a good
prep for that
one.
Thank you
all so much
for watching
Breath of Glory
and stuff.
Remember,
you can always
catch the shows
early,
either on being
a member
based on
YouTube,
subscribe over
on Twitch,
or being part
of our Patreon,
where you also
get to see our
exclusive campaigns
that we do
sometimes.
But of course,
they bring you
the amazing,
of course,
our amazing
players bring
you these
awesome episodes.
Hulky,
on social media,
where can they
find you?
You can find
me under the
exact same name
of Hulky Crow
on pretty much
every platform
between Twitch,
X,
on Blue Sky
now,
and Discord
too.
If you want
to find me,
just find that
username and
you'll find me.
Odo,
on social media,
where can they
find you?
You can find me
on Tumblr
at OdoRoshi
Rider,
you can find me
on Twitter
at OdoRoshi
Rider,
and you can find
me on Blue Sky
at OdoBytes,
and also on
Discord.
You can find me
in the community
Discord,
you can tag me,
uh,
yeah.
And Speaker D
on social media,
where can they
find you?
Yes,
where indeed?
Well,
you can find me
on Twitter
for now,
at
Supersnakekick,
and you can find
me on Blue Sky
at
SpeakerD
dot
bluesky
dot social,
and
you can also
watch myself
and Odo
and Hulky
and perhaps
even Zorin
in the future,
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Popenang's
lovely YouTube
channel,
Brother
Alpha Busa.
You can also
follow the Patreon.
Okay,
goodbye.
And Thurston,
where can they
find you on
social media?
They can find me
at all the things
at OnCallGM.
Yeah.
And of course,
you can find
everything where
I'm at,
chat,
at ZorinTheBear.com.
Thank you guys
so very much
for watching.
We hope you
have a lovely
time.
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see you next
time.
So long.
Goodbye.
Farewell.
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next time.
Goodbye.
Say it,
say it,
speaker.
Say it,
say it,
say it.
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Yeah.