Movies are fun! Movies are awesome! But movies can sometimes be very, very weird... or just plain terrible. In this intersection of fun, awesome, weird and terrible is where Matt, Luciano, Chris and Spencer live and thrive. They'll be watching the latest FACTS (Fantasy, Action, Comic, Thriller, Sci-Fi) movies available on streaming services and sharing their equally awesome, fun, weird and terrible thoughts on them. Welcome to Popcorn & Plot Holes!
Matt (00:00.594)
Hello and welcome to Popcorn and Bloodholes.
Luciano (00:06.222)
Yeah, is this where I am? Is this what we're doing? We have faces now.
Chris (00:06.303)
Heheheheeee
Spencer (00:07.646)
Question mark?
Matt (00:08.318)
I'm the host apparently, even though don't know where I am. We have faces. Yes. Welcome to YouTube. Look at our glory.
Luciano (00:21.078)
Yeah, you wish you were still listening on a podcast app, weren't you?
Matt (00:24.414)
You can still stop now and listen to the podcast.
Chris (00:26.757)
Look away!
Spencer (00:28.866)
We have faces for radio.
Matt (00:30.2)
It's that's true. 100 % true. this is an auspicious occasion, not just that we're on YouTube, but also welcome to reeducation month where we are going to talk about some movies that are on streaming. You might've missed that you should definitely not have missed. And so first thing we're going to talk about is dread, not judge dread, not the Sylvester Stallone vehicle. No, it is the call Carl Urban, Lena Headey.
Luciano (00:57.506)
I think you mean the Domno, the Domno Gleason vehicle. Yeah. You are correct.
Matt (01:00.176)
Domnoglielsen vehicle dread 2012 I think is the year we came out of we're gonna talk about this movie but first with me as always Luciano who allegedly is the law
Chris (01:00.289)
Yeah
Chris (01:06.209)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Luciano (01:13.898)
I am the law. It says right there on the card.
Matt (01:17.042)
There you go. Chris.
Chris (01:20.311)
I had my fingerprints scrubbed for this auspicious occasion so no one could find out what my governments are.
Matt (01:27.39)
Great, that's not creepy at all. And first time in a long time, Spencer.
Chris (01:29.792)
Haha!
Spencer (01:33.716)
I'm just gonna say hi like a normal person. Hi. Who do you think? I'm normal now that we're on YouTube. I'm just a regular dude.
Matt (01:36.2)
Hmm. Yeah.
Luciano (01:36.554)
Who do you think you're fooling?
Chris (01:38.775)
We know what you're up to. How dare you?
Matt (01:45.052)
the regular dude just sitting all sexy on his couch doing a podcast.
Spencer (01:47.843)
Yay!
Luciano (01:48.368)
Art van Art van Delaine the shit out of it
Chris (01:52.023)
Mm-hmm.
Spencer (01:52.627)
I'm like these weirdos. I'm human.
Matt (01:53.778)
Yeah, definitely not. So you say.
Chris (01:55.275)
Vote for him.
Luciano (02:00.429)
Ha ha ha.
Matt (02:01.95)
What?
Spencer (02:02.034)
of my human skin rebooting.
Matt (02:04.723)
You
Chris (02:05.953)
Hahaha!
Matt (02:11.624)
Give me a second.
Chris (02:12.993)
Hahaha!
Luciano (02:19.502)
I guess we are editing this then.
Chris (02:20.321)
Tell us, audience.
On a scale of 1 to 10, when's the last time you had a delicious
couple were there.
Luciano (02:29.07)
How is- How are you going to make that into a scale of 1- in a scale of 1 to 10? How thirsty are you?
Spencer (02:31.262)
Cup of Werther's.
Chris (02:38.196)
That's right, that's right just melt down just melt it down You're right, you know, it takes all the boxes just melt it down
Spencer (02:38.362)
I'm very thirsty. It works. It's the couple worthers part that gets me.
Luciano (02:43.392)
Yeah.
In a scale of 1 to 10, grass is green.
Matt (02:49.788)
Alright, just a little delay there for my TV to go haywire for no reason.
Yes, Chris, tell us how. Why don't we skip that actually and why don't we just segue into the movie we're talking about, Dread. We always start with one positive thing about movies just in case they suck. Good news is I chose this movie for Re-Education Month so it doesn't suck. And I'll tell you why. Because it's about Dread and it is an action movie that is just purely focused on the action. And so since it's my movie, I'll pick my favorite part first.
I think it has to be the scene where the Mama clan sets up the chain guns across the way and obliterates the whole block and then Dredd just, you can hear Dredd shooting guys and he just drags out her number one lieutenant and pitches them off the side of the building.
Luciano (03:34.959)
Yeah.
Luciano (03:41.726)
Yeah, it doesn't say anything. Just like, fuck this. Yeah, it is pretty badass. I have to say. Yeah. My favorite scene. I mean, I enjoyed this movie just out of the like burying the lead. But my favorite scene is when he goes, yeah, hot shot. And he goes, what? I said hot shot and he fucking shoots what looks to be fucking plasma.
Matt (03:45.442)
Not a word. And stalks back into the smoke.
Spencer (03:52.67)
Good scene. Good scene.
Luciano (04:11.138)
into the guy's mouth and melts his head. Chef's kiss. Yes, yes. And he never uses it again. Doesn't try to melt beans with it or something. No, just that one shot. A hundred percent. I love that scene.
Spencer (04:15.444)
I love how utterly unnecessary it was for that to be a plasma bullet.
Spencer (04:22.653)
Yeah.
Matt (04:27.25)
It got the job done.
Spencer (04:27.55)
Can't mel- Can't Can't melt steel beams.
Matt (04:31.902)
You can't do that. Chris, you're deep in thought. What was your favorite part of the movie?
Spencer (04:33.287)
to the...
Chris (04:37.729)
I was scanning and trying to pick just one. For me, was when other judges backup, the other backup judges came through. And then when the two meet, when Dred and the other guy, Klan, I think his name was, come and meet. And then he's like, yeah, don't worry. Surprise! And then they started like, they go into fist, they got fist, they go into fist to cup.
Spencer (05:00.67)
That's exactly how it went. Surprise, motherfucker!
Luciano (05:03.884)
Hahahaha
Chris (05:05.015)
Yeah, dopes and then like they're they're scrapping and stuff and then like other bad judges like Choke on that and then like dread Chop judo chops the guys throw it. He's like you choke on that I was like very well done. Very well done sir hats off to you,
Luciano (05:15.092)
Yeah. Yeah. Yes.
Matt (05:15.804)
Yeah.
Spencer (05:21.908)
Some quality one liners in this. I miss old one liners.
Luciano (05:23.822)
right after he did that right after smashing the guy's face the fucking smithereens on the the railing too it's really good that scene is really fun
Matt (05:27.315)
Yeah.
Spencer (05:38.301)
I all good scenes. think I liked, I really enjoyed all the scenes where they would do Zack Snyder the drug.
Luciano (05:46.626)
Yeah.
Matt (05:47.271)
Yeah.
Spencer (05:49.268)
I mean, I liked all those those moments where it was very stylized. It was a cool way of showing the drug. I like it wasn't it could have been easy just to do slow mo, but it was like slow mo with like a weird filter, like a sparkle filter with like with some rainbow hints, like you're looking through like smoke, like gasoline, you know, it has that like rainbow like glare. I don't know. It looked cool and they really utilized it a lot, which I appreciated. So
Matt (06:02.782)
Sparkole filter.
Luciano (06:03.618)
Like a sparkly rainbow filter? Yeah. Yeah.
Chris (06:06.134)
Care care you
Luciano (06:09.987)
Yeah.
Luciano (06:16.203)
Yeah.
Spencer (06:19.24)
Like the, think my favorite actual scene using it is when they first, when he like first, kick blows the door down and it's like a slow motion explosion of the guy's fat. Like, like if it was my stomach, which is like waddling, look like me jogging.
Luciano (06:27.787)
Yeah.
Matt (06:33.181)
Yeah.
Luciano (06:33.435)
The guy looked like he was wearing like his own skin as a shirt. That's what it looked like.
Matt (06:38.92)
Yeah. Yeah.
Spencer (06:40.338)
Yeah, and then he just shoots everybody in slow motion.
Matt (06:43.102)
It's yeah, it is interesting because like I'm I'll admit it here. So we get this out of the way You know, it was a movie made on a budget and the CG Not the best but it doesn't it doesn't take away from the movie. That's just like yeah, it's gross It's it's almost helpful the fact that the CGI is bad on like the gross parts of the movie So it's like you you get to detach yourself a bit from it yeah, cuz like
Chris (06:43.56)
Sum 41 video.
Spencer (06:56.678)
It shows.
Luciano (06:58.038)
Not the worst! Yeah.
Luciano (07:07.127)
Yeah.
Spencer (07:09.268)
It's like a little cartoony. I honestly found the main issue with the, wasn't even, I thought it looked good, but it was, found the color of the blood was, it was like, yeah, I was just like, well, I actually wrote down Kool-Aid. That's funny. Like I just, it was a choice. Like I know they were going through the drug rainbow filter, so that made it look, but it did make it look a little.
Luciano (07:10.36)
Yeah.
Matt (07:16.84)
That's what it is. Yep.
Luciano (07:16.942)
Yeah, I was gonna say it's tang. It's strawberry tang. that what... Yeah, or Kool-Aid, yeah.
Matt (07:20.094)
E?
Chris (07:22.977)
You were quick with that.
Matt (07:23.366)
Yeah.
Matt (07:31.826)
But it didn't even look like blood is kind of thick, right? It looks like the consistency and the color of Kool-Aid, not just the color.
Luciano (07:33.994)
Yeah, it's very watery. Yeah.
Luciano (07:39.626)
Yeah.
Spencer (07:39.912)
Like, listen, in the future, in the future, everyone's on blood thinners and they're addicted to prime energy drink.
Chris (07:40.695)
believe the word you're looking for is viscosity.
Matt (07:43.241)
Thank you
Chris (07:46.327)
Mmm
Luciano (07:46.764)
Okay, that tracks. Yeah.
Matt (07:49.138)
That's that probably makes sense. That's a slow mo is prime energy drink.
Luciano (07:53.566)
If Idiocracy is anything to go by, it's brown dough. Yeah.
Spencer (07:54.438)
Yeah, yeah, it's it's it's it's brahndo. Yeah, they're all addicted to brahndo. That was it. The thirst destroyer or something.
Luciano (08:04.322)
The thirst destroyer, yeah.
Matt (08:06.428)
Yeah. I don't know. I don't know why I wouldn't grow crops. just don't understand.
Chris (08:06.881)
What?
Luciano (08:10.986)
Yeah, poor president Kamacho.
Spencer (08:12.436)
It's got like a plant's grave.
Matt (08:14.75)
Back to this movie, Dread. thank you. Yes, that's what it is.
Spencer (08:20.205)
Sorry, the thirst mutilator. Of course, much better. So much better.
Luciano (08:20.59)
Yeah, there you go. So much better than Destroyer.
Chris (08:22.901)
What is this?
I love that for this. This is what we need.
Matt (08:32.092)
So let's talk a bit about Dread and the movie overall. You know, I think it does a really good job of showing... The reason why I like this movie is that it's an action movie that just spends its entire time telling you the story of like, I don't know, a night, a day, maybe a day, because the sun... No, the sun goes down, so maybe 24 hours. Yeah. Yeah. And it's just, you know, it's just a in the building action movie of going from the first floor to the 200th floor.
Luciano (08:52.204)
Yeah, it's like an evening. An evening, yeah.
Matt (09:02.236)
and they don't fuck around with anything but how do you get to the top of the building?
Luciano (09:08.116)
Yeah, it doesn't try to put like a philosophical bent on it and the
Spencer (09:10.718)
So like, it's
Spencer (09:15.132)
It's almost a very diehardy in that sense. You know, it's just just a man in a building.
Luciano (09:20.461)
Yeah.
Matt (09:21.416)
Yep. Die hard in the post-apocalyptic future.
Spencer (09:25.692)
Yeah, the classic battle. vs. Man, Man vs. Building, Man vs. Raptor. All the classic tropes.
Chris (09:27.243)
Yes, and.
Matt (09:30.11)
You
Chris (09:30.411)
Medvers building. Medvers elevator.
Matt (09:32.582)
you
Luciano (09:33.056)
Yeah.
Chris (09:37.525)
Man vs Stairs. It reminds me of The Raid as well. I mean, The Raid and there was also, I don't think it was on back, was another Tony Jaa tower highlight focus. When done well, it's intense and I'm trying to think of another word, like close quarters and thank you, that's what I'm looking for. Thank you, yeah.
Spencer (09:41.747)
Yeah.
Luciano (09:59.65)
Yeah, it's claustrophobic almost. Yeah. Yeah.
Spencer (10:03.419)
and focused.
Matt (10:05.544)
Well, and it's a great way for a movie that has limited budget to use that budget effectively, right? Because then everything can kind of look the same because it should. It's in a building. So why wouldn't it?
Spencer (10:13.176)
Yeah, it's like that movie the cube. We got one set baby. We got one set. We're gonna make it work
Luciano (10:13.97)
it's i love that fucking movie that movie's so good yeah but it's great it's more like thriller but we'll you know maybe next reeducation month maybe next reeducation month
Chris (10:21.162)
That's a horror movie, right?
Matt (10:24.679)
Yeah.
Chris (10:24.727)
Okay. Is that the Jennifer Lopez? Is it the Vincent D'Onofrio vehicle or the Jennifer Lopez vehicle? Anyways. Y'all brought it up. Don't ask movie questions.
Spencer (10:27.092)
We're not talking about the cube. Who brought up the cube?
Matt (10:29.33)
What's this?
Luciano (10:33.253)
Jesus Christ.
Matt (10:33.65)
Hey man, is the Dread Vehicle. No, no.
Luciano (10:38.806)
Speaking of Dread, something that I appreciate about this movie, I don't know whose decision it was, but it was the right decision is he puts on that helmet in the beginning of the movie in like, you don't ever see Carl Urban's full face. Like he's in, he's in shade or in shadow when he's putting it on and he never comes off, ever. That was, that was the perfect choice for that. Because like on the other one, which I think it's inevitable that we're going to end up comparing.
Chris (10:40.599)
Hmm
Chris (10:52.279)
Mm-hmm.
Matt (11:05.832)
Just say it.
Luciano (11:07.863)
They just keep taking the helmet off for no good reason, like in the middle of things. Just because it's, they have to show Stallone's face. Right?
Chris (11:13.737)
Yes. Which helmet do you prefer though?
Matt (11:15.646)
Yeah.
Matt (11:19.048)
What do mean? The Stallone helmet? This one?
Chris (11:20.181)
Which dread helmet do you prefer? Close and tight or the like, this one is huge. It's almost like Peacemaker size.
Luciano (11:20.306)
Luciano (11:24.002)
This one I think is closer to... Well the other one isn't much smaller and it has like gold trimmings and shit.
Matt (11:33.128)
They're both, I mean, they're both the helmets that were used in the comic books. The only thing I can say in defense of the Sylvester Stallone one is when I look at the Karl Urban one and it has that X across his face, I'm just like, is that in his eyesight? Like, can he see that? How much is it blocking out?
Luciano (11:44.448)
I don't like the X, yeah. Yeah.
Chris (11:48.001)
you
Luciano (11:50.348)
Yeah, it's weird. It was a weird... Wait, that's the wrong one.
Spencer (11:50.93)
Yeah, you can't even see!
Matt (11:57.246)
Ha
Spencer (11:57.716)
No, that's Sylvester Sloan making fun of the new one.
Luciano (12:00.75)
I see. Thank you for the explanation.
Matt (12:00.966)
Yeah, thank you. Thank you Sly. That's good. Good work. Yeah.
Spencer (12:05.108)
There it is. That's all it is. There's a semester slow depression. You can't see that much.
Chris (12:06.996)
No.
Matt (12:10.78)
Ha ha.
Chris (12:11.922)
It's okay, there you go.
bleeding into our knee.
Matt (12:16.67)
This is why we didn't want to talk about this so soon because this would happen, but here we are.
Luciano (12:21.526)
Yeah. But yeah, I really appreciate the fact that he doesn't take his helmet off ever. Like he's just, he's on the job and that's it.
Spencer (12:22.681)
There's no avoiding it.
Matt (12:27.538)
Well, mean, that's, I think that's part of the, the one thing you find frustrating with actors, and I get it, their faces wouldn't make some money, but like, the character really benefits from the idea that he's Judge Dredd, he's not Karl Urban or Sylvester Stallone. Like even Pedro Pascal, like, I know they want to get the helmet off, and they do a couple times, but it's important the Mandalorian looks like the Mandalorian. Otherwise, it's not the Mandalorian, right?
Luciano (12:41.633)
Yeah, for sure.
Luciano (12:49.57)
Yeah.
Luciano (12:53.122)
Yeah.
Spencer (12:53.172)
Yeah, and that way they don't have to pay Patrick Pascal for all the shooting because they can just voice over. Easy peasy.
Matt (12:56.318)
He didn't have to show up.
Luciano (12:56.652)
Yeah, he can just like send his lines over from the cell phone. Yeah. This is the way. There. Use that all the time.
Spencer (13:01.716)
talking talking to leave your leave your lines as a voicemail for the studio. They're season three.
Matt (13:03.708)
Woof woof woof!
Chris (13:04.44)
Sidekick
These checks write themselves. Do judge dread helm, do the judge helmets have any heads up display inside? I've always wondered. No?
Luciano (13:22.05)
Probably. No? Really? Seems like a lost opportunity.
Matt (13:22.564)
No. No. No, not really. Yeah.
Spencer (13:28.468)
There was also a missed opportunity for him not to get shot in the head with his helmet to show how effective those helmets are. That would've been cool.
Chris (13:34.027)
Yeah.
Luciano (13:36.006)
Mmm. Yeah.
Matt (13:36.05)
Maybe they work. Yeah. Who knows?
Spencer (13:37.394)
Like they ricochet? Maybe they don't! Try it out! See what happens.
Chris (13:38.775)
It'll be cool.
Chris (13:42.645)
Alright rookie, that's a hel- that's a choice. No helmet. That's a choice.
Matt (13:43.676)
Woof woof!
Spencer (13:48.441)
That is that your dread impression sounds like he's smoking Cuban cigars in Florida
Chris (13:50.09)
I don't know.
Luciano (13:50.958)
Shrek. Hey Shrek. It's Shrek. A little bit. It's not just not not not DONKEY! It's just not like Scottish enough otherwise.
Chris (13:55.723)
Did Shrek? That's Shrek to you?
Matt (13:59.304)
Thank you.
Spencer (13:59.966)
Dongy!
Chris (14:00.961)
HA HA HA!
Chris (14:07.581)
Scottish dread would be interesting.
Spencer (14:10.036)
I mean, it's like, but to your point, just to get us on track again, it's like the opposite of the Avengers where it's like all the Avengers have like masks that you press a button and literally disintegrate into nothing now because it's like in between an action scene, take them off. Hey guys, how are we? I'm Chris Hemsworth, how are we doing?
Matt (14:14.322)
Thank you.
Hey!
Luciano (14:25.696)
Yeah, those scenes where they're like surrounded by enemies and they just press a button to open this so can look around like, what are you doing?
Spencer (14:31.228)
Yeah, just to talk for one second. Everybody squad up on me. OK, let's go.
Matt (14:37.31)
I mean that's why in Iron Man they had to invent like the in suit, like cam, so Rodeo Jerec's face could be seen the whole time, right?
Luciano (14:42.687)
Camera. Yeah.
Spencer (14:43.07)
Camera.
Luciano (14:46.871)
Yeah.
Spencer (14:47.316)
That's a lot more into and like, it's a good, it's a more intuitive way to do it and ingenious way to do it. How are we gonna have like this guy on camera if he's in a mask all day?
Luciano (14:49.912)
believable.
Matt (14:51.11)
Intuitive. Yeah.
Luciano (14:53.345)
Yeah.
Matt (14:59.398)
Yeah, to Luciano's point, it helps really build the believability factor of this movie and make him legit, right? Because he's playing that role. And at the same point in time, having her not have a helmet, you know, well, it's a choice, it also like Shrek said, but it also separates her from him, right? So she's not the monster that Dredd is. She is someone who's actually trying to be a good person.
Spencer (15:05.947)
Mystique.
Luciano (15:12.942)
is a choice like Shrek said is a choice yeah
Luciano (15:27.202)
And she's not like just, just a judge, right? As well.
Spencer (15:27.602)
Yeah, that real backfires.
Matt (15:32.102)
She let Domino Gleason go, she's pure of heart.
Spencer (15:35.84)
She shot that one baby father. That was great stuff.
Luciano (15:37.518)
He did have it coming.
Matt (15:37.906)
Listen, he had it coming. Yeah. He attempted to kill a judge, that's death.
Chris (15:38.679)
But she didn't know. Yeah, yeah, true, true, true.
Spencer (15:42.6)
Yeah, it's time to do stuff.
I just love that scene. She's like, no, her husband's up there. She just doesn't want her husband to die. then she's in picture frame. It's just like Curb Your Enthusiasm music.
Luciano (15:53.998)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Matt (15:56.798)
Well, I imagine that scene goes on a bit more, right? The scene goes on a bit more and it's like, because when she sees the picture, her eyes get way too wide, like it's for the camera, but it's like, what? She see my husband? Is he fine? Is he dead? Is he alive?
Chris (16:04.488)
You won't see me again.
Spencer (16:06.21)
Yeah
Luciano (16:11.224)
Yes.
Spencer (16:11.54)
Yeah
Luciano (16:15.518)
No, no, I haven't seen him. Haven't. I haven't seen him with a hole in his face. No, not at all.
Spencer (16:16.756)
Cut to Larry David doing that like looking both ways.
Chris (16:16.939)
Why do you have that look on your face?
Matt (16:24.304)
Yeah
I certainly didn't put that hole there. That's for sure.
Chris (16:28.535)
We'll just be going now, close the door.
Spencer (16:30.836)
You won't see me again. I'm asking you a question. You won't see me again. Yeah.
Luciano (16:36.407)
She Kramer's out of the apartment.
Chris (16:37.075)
Lock your doors! All of them. I'm gonna wipe your memory now.
Matt (16:43.966)
So yeah, I think that's the important part of the movie is the helmet stuff. Another question I would like to ask you guys about is... This movie is an action film, but it does a lot of horror stuff in the sense that it's trying to give you kills, in a way. There's different ways he shoots people and uses the lawbringer to get different bullets, but it's like more than once he has basically kill shots, almost like a video game.
Were there ones that you thought were the best or maybe ones that sucked?
Luciano (17:17.08)
The best one is the high axe one where you like or the explosive one where he shoots the guys from across the the aisle or whatever. Incendiary. Yeah. And just fucking it's not. I think, OK, it's going to be like some a little bit of it. It's fucking Napalm. Like it covers the whole floor.
Matt (17:23.314)
the incendiary.
Spencer (17:31.572)
It's like, yeah, it's like phosphorous. I was gonna say it's like phosphorus. My wife was watching. She's like, what's what's incendiary? Like as a bullet, like I she knew what it's any like flammable. I'm like, it's like a phosphorus. And then as it like as it like happens, it's like, yeah, it's phosphorus.
Matt (17:33.054)
Like phosphorus. Yeah. Yeah.
Luciano (17:44.622)
Yeah, that's my favorite one other than the fucking plasma bullet I Picked it I picked it I picked it. I like fire is what I'm saying
Matt (17:44.739)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Spencer (17:52.92)
You get to pick one. You get to pick one. Yeah, yeah.
Matt (17:54.718)
He's just picking all the ones. I like this one and this one
No shit. Spencer.
Spencer (18:00.5)
OK, I know mine. Mine is and it was definitely my favorite kill of the movie, and it was the the high. What was the one the the bolts that blow high X or whatever? Which means like high caliber, high explosive when he shoots the other the bad judge, and it's so good because it's it's just a quick shot and it's like him diving to the side and it's just like one. It's kind of shots you don't see often where it's like it's just like a flat shot where you can see everything.
Chris (18:02.071)
Okay, guys.
Luciano (18:09.269)
X
Yeah, high explosive, high explosive. Explodes half of him.
Spencer (18:29.33)
and it blows his head in half and behind him the entire back wall. And I was like, that was so sick because it happened so quick and it doesn't look very CG. It looked like real. Yeah.
Luciano (18:30.666)
Yeah. Yeah.
Matt (18:32.05)
Yeah.
Luciano (18:35.022)
You
Matt (18:36.2)
Yeah. Well, you don't expect it, right? You're just like, what's going to happen here? It's like, no, gone.
Luciano (18:41.25)
He's out of bullets, he's like, fuck what's gonna happen here? Hi-Ax, just the fucking melon everywhere,
Spencer (18:41.949)
Yeah, just like.
He's I'm out. I'm out of bullets. All I have are the best bullets.
Luciano (18:50.953)
Hahaha!
Matt (18:51.41)
haha
Chris, what do you got?
Chris (18:57.269)
Y'all have covered all of them already. Best kill. I feel like, I feel like after you've identified all those, I feel like regular shots are not good enough. So I'm gonna go in different direction. And like when he stunned those two kids and he's like, I'm gonna kill you. And then they're like, no. And then he like, boom, stun. And then like, they were just like electrified. was like, wow. I thought he was actually gonna smoke those kids. Respect.
Matt (19:09.533)
Okay.
Spencer (19:23.22)
Me too. I wasn't sure if those kids were 12 or 20.
Matt (19:24.306)
Yeah. Isn't that
Luciano (19:27.926)
Yeah, yeah.
Chris (19:29.623)
Mmm, they did seem young, man.
Matt (19:30.151)
Yes.
Spencer (19:30.516)
Again, I was watching with my wife and I'm like, she's like, those are kids, right? I'm like, but he has a tattoo. And she's like, that's it's the dystopian future. Like kids can get tattoos there. Is that so hard to believe? No, you have to be 18 to get a tattoo. That's the law.
Luciano (19:35.896)
So, yeah. Be glad he doesn't have a tattoo on his eyeball.
Matt (19:36.483)
hahahaha
Matt (19:44.35)
That's the... I'm the law! No, that is the... That's how you know, you know, when young Jewish children turn 12 in the dystopian future, they get tattoos.
Luciano (19:45.622)
Hahaha!
Luciano (19:55.914)
Wait, what? That's not how that works. Yeah.
Spencer (19:57.957)
Wait, why are they Jewish? That's their bar mitzvah, is that what you're saying? It's 13.
Matt (19:59.134)
Why not? Yeah, they can't afford, they can't do anything, 13 my bad, they can't do anything else anymore. No one has money. 90, 96 % of the people don't have jobs.
Chris (19:59.639)
You
Spencer (20:09.606)
Yep, they spent all their money on their circumcisions.
Luciano (20:09.71)
You know, in peach trees. In peach trees. Not everywhere.
Matt (20:12.794)
Okay, I'm sorry, did it look like the rest of Mega City 1 had a whole bunch of jobs for everybody flying around? Okay.
Luciano (20:16.597)
Not, not really, no, not particularly.
Spencer (20:20.254)
Did they say in the beginning how much poverty is across the world or did they only say peach trees?
Matt (20:24.638)
I think they mentioned it. They mentioned it at a high level because it's like, know, basically the quick lore behind it is basically, obviously, like any good post-apocalyptic story is they nuked the planet and there are several megacities that exist in the United States specifically that hold like, they said like 800 million people, but it's all just a wasteland, right? It's just like...
Luciano (20:25.378)
They don't mention it.
Luciano (20:37.304)
Yeah.
Spencer (20:41.396)
And they're all fucked.
Luciano (20:42.766)
Yeah, and it's 800 million people in a city that goes from Washington to Boston like it's it is so many people there is so many people
Chris (20:48.651)
Mm-hmm.
Spencer (20:49.49)
That sounds terrible.
Matt (20:52.862)
Yeah. And that's why the judges can only get to like 4 % of crimes because it's a lot of like they all got to go from the Hall of Justice or whatever it's called. And they're only on motorbikes. So fucking you got to drive to Washington and do it stop a crime. No, no, thank you.
Luciano (21:01.176)
Yeah.
Chris (21:01.323)
Yeah.
Spencer (21:07.186)
I feel like even if you're writing this like in the comics or the 4 % is too low at that point, what are you even doing? Like 4 % yeah.
Luciano (21:14.027)
Yeah.
Matt (21:15.07)
Yeah. 10 % might.
Luciano (21:16.59)
Should be like it be like 30 % That'd be more believable. No, it's not 30 % of the crime. means 70 % of all the crime Good like whatever it is just goes unpunished you think that's too little
Matt (21:19.336)
That's too high.
Spencer (21:21.311)
Yeah, you got to throw, but it can't be rounded like that.
Matt (21:28.326)
Well, like, okay, but let me ask you this question. How do you think the cops nowadays are doing?
Luciano (21:33.91)
I hope it's more than 30%.
Spencer (21:36.862)
We would never know that actually that's a good point. That's a statistic. You can't you don't know what crimes are going on that aren't caught
Luciano (21:42.541)
That's true.
Chris (21:43.947)
They don't want that publicized.
Spencer (21:44.14)
So out of the crimes that they find, 100%.
Luciano (21:47.502)
100 % Dave you mean out of the crimes that they find they find 100 % of them, but that's it and that's it. Yeah
Spencer (21:53.83)
Yes, they're able to address 100 % of the crimes that they find.
Chris (21:54.22)
You
Matt (21:57.822)
So if 96 % of the crimes go unpunished, is that like a ballpark estimate? Or is it like 100 people call the judge and the judge is like, I got four, that's my quota for the day.
Spencer (22:06.62)
No, you...
Luciano (22:09.646)
Or maybe someone get past it so much that you go, you know, it's 4%. You know, it's 4%. Stop bothering me.
Spencer (22:15.076)
You know what, I actually think they did address this. I think they said they can only deal with 4 % of reported crimes. So it's like they get calls and they're like, yeah, that's even worse. It's like, they're like, there's crimes that aren't being reported obviously. And then there's the ones that people actually call for and they're just like, yeah, we'll get back to you. But let's put you on hold. Do do do do do do do do do.
Matt (22:22.078)
nice. yeah.
Luciano (22:23.314)
that's even, that's worse!
Luciano (22:33.804)
Hehehehe. Hehehehe.
Chris (22:33.984)
You're on your own. It's a choice.
Matt (22:34.236)
Ha
Chris (22:39.905)
Ha
Spencer (22:40.026)
You know that song? Darrow darrow to darrow darrow darrow darrow! That whole song.
Chris (22:43.063)
That sounds like a different sound. I thought you were like, do-do-do-do, do-do-do-do. That's what you were doing at first, were you? 4%. It's a choice.
Spencer (22:47.151)
Yeah, that was originally.
Matt (22:47.23)
Ha
Luciano (22:47.374)
All right.
Spencer (22:50.654)
That's the future.
Matt (22:54.364)
Looking forward to it. Seems like a great place. No problems whatsoever. I mean, it's like, should we talk about the judging system? So this is one of the central conceits of Judge Shred, right? Is the idea that they are empowered to do everything. There's no more justice system. The judges are the laws, they say, and so they go out and find people and...
Chris (22:59.253)
Mega City.
Luciano (23:00.024)
Yeah.
Luciano (23:05.78)
Yeah, it's... Yeah, mine too.
Spencer (23:07.604)
I mean, that was one of my hangups was,
Luciano (23:20.428)
Yeah.
Matt (23:24.154)
Sentence them on the spot and most times you get killed But not everything gets you killed sometimes. It's you know, was it two years and a resike or ISO? Yeah Yeah, I so cube. Yeah
Spencer (23:32.794)
Iso in ISO isopods I so cube I so cube
Chris (23:34.571)
Yeah. I so cube I heard. then what is, and then like resync. I don't know what that is.
Luciano (23:34.772)
Isobox or Isobob. Isocube, yeah. That is the worst thing that was like, what the fuck happens in that Isocube? They never mention it. It's like, what happens in there? It's like the worst type of horror, like the scariest thing. Yeah, exactly. Like, just kill me.
Matt (23:41.426)
That's for dead people.
Chris (23:47.317)
Mm-hmm. Mm-mm.
Matt (23:48.99)
Don't worry about it. You think it's you don't want to know.
Chris (23:55.775)
And then the
Spencer (23:55.841)
I picture either it's just an isolated room, is like horrible, or like it's full on just demolition, man, they just freeze you.
Luciano (24:00.501)
Exactly.
Chris (24:01.121)
Yeah.
Matt (24:05.63)
Yeah, I don't think it's Demolition Man because, It money. It's really expensive.
Spencer (24:08.905)
Cuff money.
Luciano (24:09.44)
Expensive, yeah.
Chris (24:12.629)
And for the kids, he said something about juvie cube. Juv-cube. What? no. no!
Matt (24:16.306)
Yeah, that's just... G-Cubes? Is that what he said? That seems targeted for no reason.
Luciano (24:16.994)
Yeah.
Spencer (24:17.332)
He says Juvcube. What kind of future is this? I'll put you in a Juvcube. no! no, the Juvcube! No!
Luciano (24:27.15)
Just kill the kid already. It's less cruel.
Yeah
Luciano (24:44.195)
Is that it's that is that and there's no pork inside that's that's what it is Yeah, bacon for you
Spencer (24:48.852)
Okay.
Matt (24:49.96)
That'll set you straight. Immediately.
Spencer (24:51.572)
I'll some bacon and eggs. Just eggs for you.
Chris (24:53.073)
No... No naked bits or strips?
Luciano (24:57.928)
You
Matt (25:01.992)
So yeah, I mean, but the central conceit, mean, really what the purpose of it talking about is like the pitfalls and the prefalls of letting cops run amok, right? Like, yeah.
Luciano (25:10.528)
The pret falls?
Chris (25:12.311)
Trap falls?
Spencer (25:12.884)
Wub
Chris (25:15.895)
What are you, John Ritter? Come and knock on our door. Here comes judgment for you.
Luciano (25:20.014)
That would be Steve Carell as Judge Dredd. That would be the Pratt Falls of Jotiss.
Matt (25:24.198)
Right? like, I mean, it, it, it, stop.
Matt (25:29.71)
That's right. Yes, correct But like to some degree right like you watch this movie you look at how sometimes it feels like the cops in our society are operating it certainly seemed like they operate them the principles of the judges in the sense that you know, They're gonna shoot whoever they are scared by immediately and the justice system lets them off because they're quote-unquote doing their job right so that that is part of the whole thing is built like that to show the like it's it's an insane system that
Spencer (25:29.812)
Yeah, yeah.
Luciano (25:45.709)
Yeah.
Matt (25:56.946)
can't help and do anything for anybody in the long term. Yeah.
Spencer (25:59.292)
Yeah, it's ineffective. And I gotta imagine if you put him in an ISO cube for two years, if it actually is isolation, they're coming out way worse than they went in. All right, you're free to go. Okay. It just like starts shooting up everywhere.
Luciano (26:06.208)
Way worse. Yeah. Yeah.
Matt (26:08.7)
Yeah, exactly.
Luciano (26:10.754)
Yeah
Matt (26:15.826)
Yeah, like I mean the whole of Mega City 1 it's pretty obvious like life is I mean the judge says it himself right it's a meek rider and that's a very apt description of how that world is run because people dying living or dying doesn't matter in many ways like the judges it's better off to kill somebody because they don't have any way to actually store them or you know like the help them be better you know and there's no recidivism is that what it is? recidivism it's just like
Luciano (26:40.876)
recidivism.
Chris (26:43.489)
they eating the people? Yeah. It's a meat grinder.
Luciano (26:45.191)
What?
Matt (26:45.206)
Well, Soylent Green is people, Chris, that is true. Those are all the ones that go to the Recyc Center.
Spencer (26:51.806)
He meant it was a literal, it's a literal meat grinder.
Luciano (26:52.908)
That is a literal meat grinder, yeah.
Chris (26:57.131)
And then like, that also like, are the reasons why, like the reasons behind the concept of a judge, was it a jury executioner and judge to like help thin the overall population down to back down to nominal, I use that lightly, nominal level.
Luciano (27:13.186)
I No, I don't... don't... Yeah...
Spencer (27:14.472)
I think that's a benefit of the, of it. think the, the actual thing is like, we just don't have time to go through. too much crime. We got to just get through people like these cases ASAP.
Luciano (27:21.044)
It's...
Luciano (27:25.262)
It's kind of like when panic sets the process, it's like that we're like, this is just running rampant. There's nothing we can do. There's no way we're going to get people trials and shit. Let's just, they're cops are killing people anyway. Let's just let them do it. Yeah.
Chris (27:39.735)
Thin out the herd! Thin out the criminal herd!
Spencer (27:43.945)
I want to see the movie that's about the transition from the regular system to that. Did they just give the judges like here's a gun? Go do it yourself. do they just get rid of lawyers and judges and just give it to the cops?
Luciano (27:53.001)
Hahaha!
Matt (27:53.128)
Well, I bet you that.
Well, if you think about coming out of the post-apocalyptic situation, right, it's probably just like trying to ban police forces back together again or some sort of justice system. And so when you have guns and a perverted sense of right and wrong, you know, you're just going to start shooting people and saying that's justice. mean, hell, you think about where the cops came from in the first place in North America, right? It was to run up slaves. like, it's basically, you know, one, there are basically two sides at the same coin, right?
Chris (27:56.715)
Why does it?
Matt (28:25.874)
you could easily go that way and just be like, okay, well, yeah, you look guilty and the judge isn't gonna get to your case for 10 years. So I'll just, you know, dispense my justice right now on you. And it might not have been always just shooting somebody, you know.
Luciano (28:37.432)
Yeah.
Spencer (28:38.376)
Now having said all of that, it's pretty great when he shoots people in this movie.
Luciano (28:41.974)
It is. Do you think it's like on purpose that they portrayed the way that the judges, like the whole system operates being so ineffective and so dumb at times? Like the whole like, judge is under fire. And then they send two idiots to the bottom floor to go, hey, you kids are making noise down there. Shut up. Like, do you think that's on purpose that they did it that way?
Chris (28:42.199)
Hmm.
Matt (29:06.27)
100 % I think if you want to watch this movie and take some sort of like deeper meaning out of it you certainly can because they are making lots of comments on like how society handles stuff but if you just like watching a fun action movie where guys die in cool ways you can also do that and turn your brain off
Luciano (29:18.387)
True.
Spencer (29:20.052)
I mean, also they showed the cops that were corrupt too. So it's like, they're bad. And then I guess the, I like how like every bad guy in this movie is like so cartoonishly bad where he just kills them, except for like one guy who's Don Paul Gleason. And they're like, let him go. He's the victim here. And it's like, see, we're learning. You know, it's like, but that one character was actually like bad more than one layer. Everyone else was like, skin him, eat him.
Luciano (29:22.861)
Yeah.
Matt (29:22.917)
Yep.
Chris (29:22.923)
Mmm.
Luciano (29:31.415)
Yep.
Luciano (29:34.924)
Yeah, who's not really
Luciano (29:39.82)
Yeah, we're learning.
Chris (29:47.03)
They showed us. Yeah.
Luciano (29:49.782)
Yeah.
Matt (29:49.854)
Shoot him!
Spencer (29:50.708)
This fuck is corpse.
Chris (29:53.719)
Bullets in the head and in the chest.
Matt (29:57.672)
But don't rape, see? Mama's nice.
Chris (29:59.317)
No, but don't.
Spencer (30:00.446)
But, well, I mean... That wasn't out of niceness.
Luciano (30:00.524)
No, but that's the thing. The way she says it is like, know it's our regular MO. I know it's like a Thursday and you get your allotment of raping, but let's not do that today.
Matt (30:07.771)
Yeah.
Spencer (30:13.48)
We're on YouTube now guys, you gotta say grape.
Matt (30:15.944)
Thank you.
Luciano (30:16.408)
give a shit.
Spencer (30:17.843)
So when they were talking about grape in her.
Chris (30:17.943)
And that's... Thanks for coming!
Matt (30:22.462)
doing well. let's, let's segue off of this section. normally at this time we would segue into our popcorn or in plot hole section, mostly the plot hole section. And, but because of reeducation month, we're gonna take a different angle at it. And I'm going to open the floor up to, you guys to ask questions about why this movie and we'll let our part-time host Spencer.
Spencer (30:22.59)
We're a dead dog.
Matt (30:51.942)
Attempts to part-time host. In turn, yeah, that's better.
Luciano (30:52.458)
The intern host.
Spencer (30:55.774)
Thank you. Thank you. You have chosen this film for reeducation. The sentence was to watch it. Why did you make this film requirement by law? You are not the law. I'm the law. Why did you make this movie? Why'd you pick it? I'm Shrek. You donkey.
Chris (31:00.279)
It's Shrek.
Matt (31:13.502)
Why did I make this movie?
Luciano (31:15.466)
Why did you make this movie? Why are you the showrunner for Dread?
Luciano (31:22.156)
Yeah
Spencer (31:25.965)
Why is this movie like an onion with layers?
Matt (31:28.262)
Okay, cool. Anything else, Spencer?
Spencer (31:33.18)
That is all.
Matt (31:33.822)
Okay, thank you. Why I picked this movie, think... Jets Red is probably one of my favorite superheroes, or the idea of like, maybe not just Jets Red, but the idea of like, the world. think it's, I've had it really interesting and fun. And I like a good action movie, and this one is very, like I said, it's a very succinct action movie. It's much like John Wick, right? It's just like, there's no nonsense, it's just a bunch of cool shit happening with a fun story. And I really like simple action movies, so that's really one of the reasons why I wanted it.
this.
Spencer (32:04.488)
Did you read the comics?
Matt (32:05.874)
I've read some comics, yeah, there's a lot. I mean, it's a UK, sorry, it's published in the UK and it's more popular in the UK than it is in North America.
Luciano (32:15.363)
So that's why you like it.
Matt (32:17.564)
Because I'm secretly British, is that what you're saying to me? I all right, I guess. I watch soccer, or watch football, and I read Judd Shred, so I'm British. That's how it works. But like, you know, one of the main creators is, I don't know, Carlos Esquera, let's see. Spanish, okay. He is Spanish. Well, one guy's Spanish and the other guy's British as far as I know, so.
Luciano (32:18.752)
Yes. Yes.
Chris (32:22.337)
Fish and chips. Let the man cook.
Luciano (32:22.488)
Hahaha!
Spencer (32:22.644)
I guess
Luciano (32:34.796)
Yeah, sounds very British.
Luciano (32:39.17)
Okay.
Spencer (32:40.082)
a lot of issues.
Matt (32:42.324)
Yeah, you're welcome. I yield my time.
Luciano (32:44.236)
Hahaha!
Spencer (32:44.468)
Also, I just want to add because you mentioned John Wick. It's just small story is my wife's mother was in town. My mother-in-law and I had to watch this movie and she likes John Wick as most people do. And I was like, I got to watch this movie for my podcast. Let's all watch it. It's like it's like John Wick, but it's in the future. They're like, yeah, great. And we turn it on. It's like first scene. It's like skin them and throw them off the roof. And I was like,
Luciano (33:05.119)
no.
Matt (33:11.42)
Hehehehehe
Luciano (33:12.078)
Hahaha
Spencer (33:14.26)
What did I get into here? Yeah, was like, this is John Wick, same thing. Yeah, it was like, like really a third of the movie, like we could turn it off if you guys could watch it tomorrow. They're like, there's silence. I'm like, OK, that's not a no. So she I think. I think her review was. It's like a B movie.
Luciano (33:15.34)
Just exactly like John Wick.
Matt (33:18.312)
Yeah. What do you think happens to the Continental? didn't, you know?
Luciano (33:22.542)
Mm.
Luciano (33:29.214)
hahahaha
Matt (33:33.918)
She's a fan.
Matt (33:42.853)
okay. That's fair.
Luciano (33:43.534)
It's not wrong.
Spencer (33:44.446)
And I said, what's your favorite part? And I got silence. So that's what I assumed.
Luciano (33:48.13)
Hahaha
Matt (33:48.542)
So all of it was the answer. got it. Yeah. Yeah.
Chris (33:49.279)
You
Luciano (33:51.616)
Yeah, of course. Yeah. I have a question for you. So we get it. You like dread because you think you're British, blah, blah, blah. OK. But why this dread and not Sly's dread?
Matt (33:56.136)
Sure.
Matt (34:06.335)
good question. Good question. Well, for all of you, let me start at the beginning.
Spencer (34:06.708)
Ooooo
Spencer (34:16.353)
But talk like you're Sylvester Stallone, please.
Luciano (34:18.318)
Ha
Matt (34:19.647)
Okay guys, don't okay stop I Mean listen, I love some slice of them and I Love all of his movies. I really I really appreciate it when he teamed up with Rob Schneider. Those movies are always the best Famously hey listen nothing nothing wrong with demolition man
Luciano (34:21.39)
Don't don't don't just talk as you just just talk like you
Spencer (34:21.958)
Incredible. When did Stallone get here?
Luciano (34:33.166)
EEEEH
Spencer (34:39.899)
Yeah, famously.
Luciano (34:40.63)
Jesus Christ.
Spencer (34:43.7)
Yeah, the three seashells would have fit in well in this film.
Matt (34:47.762)
I think so. the thing is, is they don't.
In that movie, they don't do a bad job of taking on the Jetshred world, but they don't care. It's a movie that's trying to be serious, but can't help but make itself a joke the entire time. I think it's because Sylvester Stallone doesn't take the movie seriously.
Luciano (35:06.413)
Hmm.
corny.
Luciano (35:15.724)
I mean, maybe it has something to do with the fact that he has to wear a completely conspicuous blue lens and has to pretend to be twins with Armando Santé. You think that doesn't help?
Matt (35:26.354)
Listen, they're twins. They're twins. Don't even start. So that movie is fun, but it just loses it. And it has a surprisingly good cast, but it loses like, it just doesn't have the story beats there. It's just kind of all muddled and all over the place and kind of ends up at the end. They try to be this grand thing, right? Where this movie is simple. This movie shows Judge Red exactly as he is. He's a simple man. You know, he just wants to get his business done.
Luciano (35:44.535)
Okay.
Matt (35:52.22)
He's just keeping peace and he'll stop at nothing to do it. He can't be stopped. He's a zombie almost right? Like he nothing will stop him from doing his job and it's yeah Yeah and so like
Luciano (35:58.856)
Like a robot almost. Yeah, yeah he is.
Spencer (36:00.532)
He's like a very Terminator-esque. He's like, I'll have peace no matter how many millions of people I have to kill to get it, like that kind of philosophy.
Chris (36:04.521)
cop.
Luciano (36:06.958)
Yeah, yeah
Matt (36:07.602)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, he, well, he passed her. I mean, he has a shred of heart. He's like the, Grinch. It really was a Grinch story, I think. Why? Cause she lost her gun?
Chris (36:08.375)
Hmm
Spencer (36:16.466)
I think he should have failed there, personally.
Yes, and I think it would have been very like apt, apt finale because he's such a stickler for the rules. If he was just like, she failed, she didn't, she lost her gun. And you're just like, that's how you end the movie. You're like, it would be a more poignant and I think because you'd be like, fuck, he is kind of kind of a dick, which is the point.
Luciano (36:25.976)
Hard ass, yeah, yeah.
Matt (36:26.622)
Cough Cough
Luciano (36:37.846)
Hahaha
Matt (36:39.442)
I mean, throwing mama off the top of the roof wasn't being a dick enough or throwing her lieutenant off of the... Okay, guess he... Just a bit more dick. But yeah, and as your finisher's... The question, the finisher's answer to the question is, he plays Judd Shred like he is in the comics. He plays him exactly... He's perfect as Shred. And Sylvester Stallone is just... No. Yeah. Well, Sylvester Stallone plays Sylvester Stallone.
Spencer (36:44.052)
Not enough.
It wasn't enough!
Luciano (36:59.22)
Mm-hmm. He doesn't remove his helmet like half of the time. Yeah.
Matt (37:09.03)
I mean, if you take Sylvester Stallone from Timecop and put- or not Timecop, Demolition Man.
Luciano (37:12.6)
Timecop? Wait, back up. What does he play in timecop again? He plays the machine. He plays the machine that takes him back, yeah.
Chris (37:13.053)
Yes! Yes!
Spencer (37:14.044)
Wow, what a roll.
Matt (37:15.55)
Listen, in time, he plays the machine, that's right. Yeah. But if you move Sebastian Sloan from Demolition Man and put that same character in Judge Dredd, no difference.
Chris (37:18.207)
He plays time cop.
Chris (37:23.127)
my god.
Luciano (37:26.349)
Mm-hmm.
Luciano (37:30.222)
Yeah, I was going to say it's the it's the same character.
Spencer (37:31.39)
What if you put Rocky in Dredge Dredd? What if you Rambo in Dredge Dredd?
Matt (37:34.322)
Perfect, he just got on punching everybody.
Luciano (37:36.064)
Rambo Rambo Rambo I that I would pay money to see that
Matt (37:40.883)
I think Rambo is a more accurate Judge Dredd than Sylvester Stallone's Judge Dredd was.
Luciano (37:44.236)
Dundread.
Spencer (37:46.088)
What if you put the expendables in Judge Dredd? I don't know his character, nobody does.
Luciano (37:48.524)
No, come on. No, you put Tango from Tango in Cash.
Matt (37:52.814)
No, no. Well, he's uptight, but he cares too much about money and money doesn't exist, so.
Luciano (37:56.257)
Yeah, he is.
Spencer (37:58.812)
What if you put stop or my mama will shoot into dread?
Chris (38:01.815)
Yeah.
Matt (38:03.056)
I mean, if you put,
Luciano (38:05.688)
Stallone Cobra.
Matt (38:07.394)
Marion Corretti. Yeah, that's that's Judd Shred. Yeah.
Spencer (38:08.808)
That one probably fits. That's a name.
Luciano (38:08.972)
Marion Cobretti, yes.
You
Spencer (38:16.158)
They call me Cabretti. They call me Snakeston.
Matt (38:18.024)
Ha ha ha.
Luciano (38:18.392)
Yeah.
Matt (38:20.99)
Mike Snake... Mike Snake Skin.
Spencer (38:22.75)
Jonathan Pythonos. It's Greek.
Chris (38:24.586)
Yeah
Luciano (38:26.478)
If he was Greek, not Italian, it would be Pythonos.
Matt (38:30.558)
Yeah.
Spencer (38:34.492)
And the Conderos. I'm from Spain.
Matt (38:38.59)
Chris, you got any questions you want to know you want to listen stuff?
Spencer (38:42.384)
Viper Berg, I'm Jewish. I'm David Viper Berg. I think Viper Berg. I'm here to solve your accounting errors one number at a time. You go to the Jew cube. It's a good time.
Luciano (38:44.258)
You
Chris (38:44.415)
Viperberg!
Matt (38:49.502)
Bye.
Luciano (38:52.27)
Isaac, Isaac Viperberg Everybody calls me ITZIK
Matt (39:00.774)
I Spencer, I assume that Isaac Viperberg sends everybody to the Geo cubes.
Luciano (39:11.288)
with no dinner.
Spencer (39:12.084)
we're going to the chew cubes. boy. I'm Jewish. I can say these things YouTube
Luciano (39:20.013)
Yeah.
Chris (39:20.961)
Yeah, YouTube. Put some... It's a choice! I'm wondering why you Why you picked Dread as your pick for Re-Education Month over the other guys. The Will Ferrell Mark Wahlberg video.
Matt (39:21.704)
Yeah, yeah, we all are. Chris, go ahead.
Luciano (39:23.33)
We all are!
Spencer (39:23.572)
We all... Look at him motherfucker!
Spencer (39:46.832)
Excellent question, as always.
Matt (39:47.436)
You think I only chose from cop movies?
Chris (39:54.069)
Yes.
Matt (39:54.982)
Okay, fair enough.
Luciano (39:56.238)
Why did you not pick Paul Blart Molocop?
Matt (40:00.062)
That's, yeah.
Chris (40:02.383)
I retract and I plus one, I plus one Paul Blart Mall Cops. One and two.
Luciano (40:03.758)
You
Matt (40:04.2)
Hahaha
Spencer (40:06.46)
Yeah.
Luciano (40:10.146)
Yeah, of course, Kevin James, classic action hero.
Spencer (40:13.78)
Because when you really strip it down, they're very similar films.
Chris (40:15.381)
Yes. Correct. It's the story of a man.
Matt (40:17.106)
They are, think. Correct me if wrong, but did...
Spencer (40:20.683)
Another man versus building trope
Chris (40:22.847)
Hahaha!
Matt (40:24.286)
Did Paul Blart get a sequel?
Luciano (40:27.191)
Yeah.
Spencer (40:27.718)
It's goddamn right it got a sequel.
Chris (40:28.011)
believe he did and a segue was still in it.
Matt (40:29.694)
Fuck me. I cannot fucking believe that Paul Blart and Wildcuff got it. Maybe I should have done that once, it's got two movies.
Luciano (40:30.636)
Ha ha ha ha ha!
Spencer (40:36.468)
Dread didn't, Paul Blart Mall Cop did.
Matt (40:39.806)
Dread? No. Dead. Makes sense.
Luciano (40:41.582)
Yeah.
Chris (40:42.059)
rests the prosecution rests.
Matt (40:44.734)
god, why this one over other... I mean...
Chris (40:50.263)
Paul Bart 3.
Matt (40:54.206)
Take care.
Spencer (40:55.156)
Did you get that out of your system? You feel good about that? You feel good about saying that?
Chris (40:55.425)
Yeah. Yeah. I feel very good. Very, very good.
Matt (40:56.734)
You feel good you feel satisfied Yeah, all right. All right I Mean I don't care for the police in any way shape or form so it wasn't a matter of picking, you know, which cop to champion on this like, you know in terms of superhero movies or action movies like what are they gonna do pick Green Lantern like that? That's a fucking abomination. Everybody knows that
Luciano (41:23.442)
Yet you still picked another cop.
Matt (41:26.608)
Okay, well aren't all superheroes cops?
Luciano (41:27.246)
Well, not as much as green lanterns are.
Matt (41:34.534)
I rest my case.
Spencer (41:34.748)
I mean, think what Chris is trying to say is both Paul Blart and Dredd are deconstructions of the authoritarian regime of the police system and what led you to pick one over the other when both are so apt.
Chris (41:50.167)
and identical.
Matt (41:52.446)
I like the science fiction angle of dread. Paul Blart is... Paul Blart is too... too contemporary for my tastes. I would like to... it's always, you know, whenever you're fed to harsh truths, it's always better to wrap it in a nice science fiction or fantasy wrapper so that I can, you know, I don't have to feel bad about actual society. Yeah, it's not... it's not...
Spencer (41:57.748)
Clearly, clearly haven't seen Bulblar 2.
Luciano (42:03.47)
I
Spencer (42:03.636)
Chris (42:04.791)
Hmm.
Spencer (42:19.464)
more palatable.
Luciano (42:21.102)
I see.
Matt (42:21.95)
Our society is in a post-apocalyptic wasteland with police acting like vigilantes, killing people indiscriminately and getting away with it. That's just Judge Dredd's problem. We're fine here.
Luciano (42:32.172)
Yeah, exactly. Yeah. It's not, it's a dystopian future, not a dystopian present.
Spencer (42:33.588)
Everything's fine!
Matt (42:39.762)
Yeah, yeah, Foblr is too real. I don't want to know what's happening right now.
Spencer (42:39.942)
Yeah, Paul Blart's too real.
Luciano (42:43.32)
That makes sense. It's too greedy. It's too greedy to watch.
Spencer (42:44.422)
It's too painful to watch.
Chris (42:44.695)
you
Matt (42:46.75)
Yeah, yeah, I just want to have fun when I watch a movie. If you want to get the truth, know, fucking just shoveled in your mouth, Paul Blart.
Luciano (42:55.906)
Paul Blart III The Truth Behind the Throne I think that's the name of the movie
Matt (42:59.77)
Okay. But, real... Throne. He said the same thing. Movies that exist, you can watch Paul Blart 1 and 2. As an option as well.
Chris (42:59.799)
Hey! Did you say the truth behind the Trump or throne?
Luciano (43:03.714)
Yes.
Chris (43:05.623)
Okay.
Luciano (43:07.543)
Hahaha!
Yes.
Matt (43:13.086)
Does that answer your question Chris?
Chris (43:17.431)
most definitely.
Matt (43:20.678)
Any other questions? Anybody else want to come at me?
Luciano (43:24.603)
No, think... What do think you're doing? No, that's me. It clearly says right there.
Spencer (43:26.068)
Who do you think you are?
Matt (43:30.376)
the law?
Matt (43:36.446)
Fair. All right, well, that was fun. I'm glad you're all wrong. And I was right in whatever we just did. Let's talk about some fun questions. that's fine. I was the popcorn and you were the plot holes and popcorn is better. So I win. Is that better? Is that what for you? Perfect. Nailed it. Yeah, don't be the plot holes. Let's ask some fun questions. The drug slow mo. Apparently you take it and it slows.
Luciano (43:43.084)
That's wrong podcast.
Chris (43:46.591)
Or it's there is it?
Chris (43:53.623)
That's yummy.
Matt (44:05.957)
down to like 1 % I believe the the medic says
Luciano (44:07.968)
Yeah.
Spencer (44:10.078)
What was the drug called? It was just called slow mo, right? Man, that's just, they should have come up with a better name.
Luciano (44:12.043)
Yeah.
Matt (44:12.124)
Yep, that's what it's called. I think it's perfect name. This isn't the question, but Spencer, since you had to interject here, what name should they have used?
Spencer (44:23.156)
I already told you, Zack Snyder.
Luciano (44:25.985)
That doesn't work in the universe.
Chris (44:26.135)
you
Spencer (44:29.768)
What are you the universe police?
Luciano (44:30.094)
What do you think Zack Snyder would be? No, yes! You think Zack Snyder would be famous enough in the 2200s that anybody... No!
Spencer (44:37.844)
Yeah, you haven't seen his best work yet You haven't seen a rep was it called rebel moon for
Chris (44:38.784)
Yes!
Matt (44:39.314)
Well, you know, it's Spencer's defense.
Rebel Moon. I think that Rebel Moon 4 set off the nuclear war.
Luciano (44:45.559)
Yeah.
Luciano (44:50.03)
so it would be like detrimental. Okay, I can see that.
Chris (44:51.469)
my god.
Spencer (44:57.3)
We love you, Zach. But you caused the apocalypse, and we all know it.
Matt (44:57.508)
Mmm. Zach, we love you.
Luciano (44:57.516)
I hope he is watching. No he don't.
Chris (44:59.841)
we do.
Matt (45:02.406)
You just write stories and let someone else tell them.
Chris (45:05.835)
Back to the Justice League. What?
Spencer (45:07.474)
No, the opposite. Let other people write them and you direct them. No, it's the stories that are terrible. He's the one who wrote the grain.
Matt (45:11.814)
No, that's worse.
Luciano (45:12.34)
No, yeah, we don't know his his his movies are also terrible because they're all slow motion
Chris (45:20.663)
Okay, move on, back on track. Slow motion.
Spencer (45:22.184)
We'll get back to this.
Matt (45:23.262)
Stop talking to Zach. Slow-mo the drug.
Chris (45:26.517)
We love you Zach.
Luciano (45:27.203)
Yes.
Matt (45:29.098)
What we see people take it to hang out in a room with music, driving or be in the back of a car, I don't think they took it to get shot, I don't know. think this happens, potentially be skinned and thrown off of your balcony. But what is the best thing to do while on slow mo?
Luciano (45:35.022)
get shot eventually.
Spencer (45:39.688)
That seems like primarily what's happening.
Luciano (45:41.07)
Ha
Chris (45:42.103)
you
Luciano (45:46.115)
Yeah.
Chris (45:46.647)
Yeah.
Spencer (45:51.796)
Say it.
Say it, who's gonna say it?
Luciano (45:56.948)
It's 30 for a test.
Matt (45:58.311)
Yep, that's it.
Spencer (46:00.444)
We did it.
Matt (46:02.142)
Cause you have so much more time to study, right? a genius at no time. Yeah.
Luciano (46:03.744)
Exactly, yeah. You absorb everything.
Spencer (46:05.684)
and so much more time to do all these activities.
I would say, you know what would be good is I think like eating like something delicious. Like like I would just yeah, like I would just like. Take it and then like take a bite of fried chicken or like ice cream and just be like.
Chris (46:11.915)
to do all these activities.
Chris (46:16.758)
Hmm.
Luciano (46:17.022)
Mmm. Okay.
Matt (46:19.454)
Like you really, really taste the flavors.
Chris (46:20.631)
100. Your favorite thing? What would- Yeah.
What's your favorite thing you would have, you would eat with slow-mo? Well, okay.
Luciano (46:27.553)
Yeah.
He just said it. Okay, there you go. I mean, it's fair, that's fair. I have to say though, it's probably gonna be ineffective in slow motion, but you know, you do you.
Spencer (46:31.666)
vagina.
Matt (46:35.102)
Well, okay, but so this is here's the thing right it makes time feel like it's going slow So if let's just get into no we're getting to the physics of this If Spencer is high on slow mo and he's going down his wife who's not on slow mo
Spencer (46:44.286)
Yeah.
Chris (46:49.952)
Yeah.
Luciano (46:51.118)
But it doesn't, yeah, that's what I'm gonna say.
Chris (46:58.007)
Mm-hmm.
Spencer (47:00.134)
Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, why does that do you my wife? I mean, I guess it's better than it is. Don't bring her into this.
Luciano (47:03.082)
Wait, what?
Chris (47:06.249)
So Spencer's going down on Sylvester Stallone.
Spencer (47:08.412)
A hypothetical, a hypothetical vidya.
Luciano (47:09.176)
Let's go.
Matt (47:12.008)
Great, a hypothetical future vagina.
Luciano (47:12.15)
Okay?
Chris (47:14.603)
Betcher's going down on Paul Blart, mall cop.
Luciano (47:15.212)
The... The best kind?
Matt (47:18.642)
Great. And that said, Vagina is not on slow-mo. Like, is it?
Luciano (47:27.49)
He's going like that. Yes.
Matt (47:30.566)
But no, but is he? Or does he only feel like he is?
Luciano (47:34.734)
I see.
Chris (47:35.191)
think it's a personal experience.
Spencer (47:36.808)
No, you just feel like you're going slow, but you're moving, you can't move faster.
Chris (47:39.444)
in real time.
Luciano (47:40.758)
Hmm, but you move at normal time you just feel it passing really slowly
Matt (47:41.427)
Yeah.
So you really wouldn't want to be on it while doing the action, you would be on it while getting the action.
Spencer (47:47.698)
No, no, I was just joking. Yeah, if you were doing if you were going to do it, you want to do it like right before you bust and then you feel like you're busting for like an hour.
Luciano (47:55.17)
Yeah, for like ages, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Chris (47:59.295)
It makes me feel good.
Spencer (48:00.436)
Yeah, exactly!
Luciano (48:01.23)
for a long time.
Matt (48:01.886)
Hey, let's go back to Spencer's food analogy just to make it seem like we're not complete perverts.
Chris (48:03.831)
Hmm.
Yeah, I was like... You said chicken. Was that your favorite?
Spencer (48:08.116)
When you're eating that sweet, sweet food, you feel it BUSTIN' in your mouth.
Luciano (48:14.899)
The flavors explode in your mouth!
Chris (48:15.676)
Busted in my KFC!
Spencer (48:18.982)
Yeah, we're talking about food guys.
You want to time it so when you take the drug right as you're busted into your food, you feel it for a long time.
Matt (48:31.389)
Right.
Luciano (48:32.488)
Yeah, you want the drug to kick in as things are exploding in your mouth. Yeah.
Spencer (48:37.074)
I I mean, it's to that analogy without it sounding also very homoerotic.
Chris (48:38.507)
would really like, my favorite dessert is chocolate mousse. I would love to have that.
Matt (48:45.822)
You can just not say bust. You can just not say bust. It's not hard.
Luciano (48:45.832)
Is that what we're doing? Is that what we're doing?
Chris (48:51.643)
Listen, while we're on the subject, if you were to take that drug just before you take a hearty bite out of the buttermilk biscuits and then bust, yo, I know.
Matt (49:02.994)
You're so close, Chris. You're so far away.
Luciano (49:04.253)
Hahaha
Spencer (49:04.306)
You were so close. Actually, I don't think he ever was really that close.
Luciano (49:07.19)
No.
Matt (49:07.474)
Hey, so, okay, what else besides food and sex apparently? What else could you do on slow-mo that would make it better?
Chris (49:08.801)
Yeah
Chris (49:17.589)
Winning. Winning. Not well.
Luciano (49:17.698)
Hmm. What? are you Charlie Sheen?
Matt (49:19.422)
Well, what... How?
Spencer (49:19.604)
What is this? Winner winner chicken dinner. I don't think so. Winner winner sheen dinner.
Matt (49:25.392)
Show your work, Chris.
Chris (49:27.147)
Yeah, so say you get like a new job. Say you win the lotto. Say you get out of a parking ticket. Say you get like news that you're gonna become like a parent or you found, or you found.
Matt (49:30.878)
All right.
Spencer (49:45.3)
I just like the analogy of you just find out you're gonna be a father. You're like I'm gonna do some drugs to celebrate I'm so happy that I'm bringing a new life into this world fuck. Let's get fucked up
Matt (49:50.31)
Hahaha
Luciano (49:50.382)
I mean, you're all three of your all three of your parents doesn't that track? I'm gonna have to do hard drugs
Matt (49:56.86)
I mean, yeah, it tracks.
Chris (49:59.49)
yes, I'm a first time. I've never been, you know what, honey? We're gonna be parents. Let's this going, yay!
Matt (50:01.79)
You
Luciano (50:08.13)
Hahaha!
Matt (50:10.115)
so why, why am I taking slow mo for all this? You gave an exhaustive list of situations.
Spencer (50:17.532)
Yeah, those are all terrible because those are all happening in your head. So I feel like you do the drug and that feeling would still be short because it's a mental feeling.
Chris (50:25.281)
But why would it be short? Slow-mo would extend it.
Luciano (50:27.783)
Yeah, if it slows down your perception of time, it might say that it will make it last longer. I guess.
Spencer (50:33.31)
slow down your emotions too. One thing I wish they did in the movie, which I thought they would, would be like, would slow mo give you an advantage? Like almost like a superpower. Yeah. Like at a fight.
Chris (50:37.9)
Hmm.
Chris (50:44.842)
in a fight.
Luciano (50:46.092)
I think it's the opposite because your reaction time is really slow too. So much so that he goes into that room and like nobody does anything. He shoots everybody, nobody shoots him. Right? Yeah.
Matt (50:47.751)
Yeah.
Spencer (50:50.77)
Is it?
Chris (50:50.881)
Look, just like in the...
Chris (50:56.683)
their reactions were delayed just like in the first chase scene and like Buddy Driver was talking to the guy in the back and he's like, what? So.
Luciano (51:00.76)
Yeah.
Matt (51:03.9)
Yeah, Spencer, I know you're saying, because you think if you were able to, it's like the flash, right? The flash moves. And as he moves, can do like, you know, a hundred things for everybody is one thing. But the problem here is like, you're not moving that fast. You just feel like time is moving that fast. And so I think it gives you the opposite effect of like everything is slow. And so your reactions are super slow. Your perception of everything is slowed down.
Luciano (51:04.275)
Hahaha!
Spencer (51:09.649)
Yeah, exactly.
Luciano (51:15.009)
Yeah.
Luciano (51:26.988)
Yeah, it might actually might. It must be like really jarring. Like you're trying to move your body and it's it's just not going.
Spencer (51:28.564)
But it seems like they're.
Matt (51:37.47)
Yeah, like moving through like molasses or some sticky substance where...
Spencer (51:37.928)
Yeah.
Chris (51:38.113)
Yeah
Luciano (51:39.692)
Yeah, yeah.
Spencer (51:42.256)
I was just pictured like, know you're not physically going faster, but you're seeing like, imagine like you're in a fist fight, you'd like, this guy is, I can see exactly where his punches coming from and I can like plan my counter. I have so much time.
Chris (51:42.561)
ball pit.
Luciano (51:54.574)
Yeah, but you, but you can't react on time.
Matt (51:56.04)
But you move the same speed that he's moving at. So you don't get to move fast. He's moving slow and you see it and then you also.
Chris (51:57.184)
You can see it, but your body is behind.
Luciano (52:01.037)
Yeah.
Spencer (52:03.048)
No, I know you don't move.
Yes, but if you saw it coming and you had it like, you saw exactly which way it's coming from, you could like plan your head movement perfectly. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Literally exactly that.
Matt (52:12.466)
Are you trying to Sherlock Holmes me right now? Is this what it is? But your brain is also processing everything, but you was extremely slow. So like you're, you're, you're applying in, this, in the, in the state of being high that at some point you're operating at your base level. Well, everything else happens slow around you. Everything is my impression is everything is slowed down.
Chris (52:16.449)
It sounds like that should be possible.
Luciano (52:20.8)
Yeah. So what?
Spencer (52:30.824)
I thought the brain was.
Luciano (52:34.89)
Yeah, that's how that's I got to like
Spencer (52:36.743)
That sounds like a what the fuck goes to the point.
Luciano (52:38.766)
It's just the height. Yeah, it's the height of it.
Matt (52:38.994)
Everything slows down, it's cool. Yeah.
Spencer (52:42.516)
So you think it also gets you high. That was one thing I also, does it just slow down time? Or does it also give you like an endorphin or some sort of chemical rush?
Luciano (52:45.038)
I would imagine so.
Matt (52:50.224)
It's probably just, yeah, it's probably getting high because it's an extreme sensation your body has no way to process, right? So whether that is an actual high like cocaine, I don't know, but it's giving you an experience that you can't achieve without the drug.
Chris (53:03.915)
game.
Spencer (53:04.882)
It definitely-
Spencer (53:10.13)
I would say that the movie depicts it as a way of like feeling things because like every time someone's doing it, like she's in the water, like lifting your arm out and it's like, the sensation is like really crazy because she could feel every water droplet coming off. Or or vice versa. When they skin them. It's absolutely awful.
Luciano (53:18.466)
That's such a cool scene.
Matt (53:20.147)
Yeah.
Yeah. But that means everything is slow. Yeah. Yeah, that would be super painful. And yeah.
Luciano (53:29.398)
Yeah, because they did it on purpose. Like, you know, hit him with slow mo and then skin them. Right. That was the part. Yeah.
Spencer (53:35.304)
What a waste of drugs.
Matt (53:37.924)
Eh, they're making it. Anyway, so that's slow mo. Good talk, everybody.
Spencer (53:39.668)
Yeah, that's true.
Luciano (53:42.491)
Hahaha!
Matt (53:46.3)
Let's chat about the Mama clan for a second, shall we? Seems like a great company to work for.
Luciano (53:49.336)
Sure. Great bunch of family business people.
Chris (53:51.723)
You know?
Matt (53:55.336)
Family business people, great benefits. That's actually what I want to talk about. We see they have an eye care program that you can retrieve really great eye care out of. What other things are in that benefits plan? When you sign up to be part of the clan, what other benefits can you expect?
Spencer (53:56.235)
Great benefits.
Luciano (54:08.504)
Hahaha
Luciano (54:19.15)
Hmm.
Spencer (54:20.382)
free tattoos.
Chris (54:20.574)
rating.
Luciano (54:21.589)
Yeah, free tattoos by
Matt (54:23.678)
What was that Chris? I don't think that's a benefit. No.
Chris (54:24.919)
I said berating.
Luciano (54:27.597)
Yeah.
Chris (54:28.073)
Is it it?
Spencer (54:29.086)
Shut up. You're welcome.
Matt (54:34.78)
haha
Luciano (54:35.47)
Free tattoos by dubious artists, I think is one.
Spencer (54:38.972)
And it has to be the mama tattoo. But it's free.
Luciano (54:42.306)
But yeah.
Matt (54:44.848)
Okay, that's fair, it's free.
Luciano (54:45.45)
Also, you, you get a lot of training in torture as well. Hands up. Yep.
Chris (54:45.857)
who pays.
Matt (54:50.43)
Okay, okay, okay.
Chris (54:51.383)
hands on training.
Spencer (54:52.497)
Never know when you could use that.
Matt (54:54.12)
So it's really just like what you're saying is like they have a stipend for training, personal development. Yeah, that's great. Yeah. Whether you use it on torture, drug manufacturing.
Luciano (54:59.544)
Personal development, yeah.
Luciano (55:06.252)
Yeah, no, if you want to use on those things, it subsidizes what I'm saying. Yeah. Yeah.
Matt (55:08.86)
Yeah, exactly. Yeah, that's great. Yeah, okay. Crocheting, yeah, okay.
Spencer (55:09.914)
It's hands-on experience.
Chris (55:12.247)
Crocheting to pays there's also a to pay benefit
Luciano (55:17.486)
That's true. least one of them took full advantage.
Spencer (55:18.324)
Free wigs, free wigs.
Chris (55:21.855)
It's like, finally I can feel like my best self coming to work.
Spencer (55:22.504)
I believe I saw at least two, three of them believe had a just for men hair pieces.
Matt (55:31.774)
Great. And they got a job. like they said, you know, 96 % of people don't have jobs. So our,
Luciano (55:38.449)
That's the benefit of having a job is having a job is one of them. Yes.
Matt (55:41.906)
Yeah, so you get money and food, which is pretty cool. guess that's not a benefit per se. Okay, anything else you think they offer?
Luciano (55:49.238)
Yeah.
Luciano (55:53.292)
You get to have like, when you have tenure of like five years or more, you get to have monthly one-on-one dinners with mama. Cause everybody knows she's a great conversationalist, a great mentor. Yeah. You got one-on-one time with her.
Chris (56:03.894)
Hmm.
Matt (56:04.072)
Like mentorship. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Good.
Spencer (56:09.556)
free skin tag removals.
Luciano (56:12.814)
Yeah, no, but they get removed
Spencer (56:15.518)
They don't specify how they're removed, but they are removed.
Matt (56:19.123)
We'll take care of that for you. That's good. Well, that's helpful.
Chris (56:21.249)
discounts on on slow mo sounds like
Luciano (56:23.874)
I was gonna say they like a great drug plan they have as well.
Spencer (56:25.192)
That's true.
Matt (56:27.066)
Mm-hmm. Yeah. Huge discounts on slow-mo. Other drugs, less so, but that's okay. Well, I think that's the slow-mo, Yeah.
Chris (56:27.831)
Mm-hmm.
Chris (56:32.233)
and meditation headspaced.
Luciano (56:35.84)
I had to get Headspace, get a corporate account for Headspace.
Chris (56:39.391)
Yeah, you're walking through a field on slow mo.
Spencer (56:40.418)
Free dreaming.
Luciano (56:45.166)
You get to listen to your Headspace app, like meditation thing while you're falling down the shaft with slow mo on.
Matt (56:53.906)
That's not a benefit.
Chris (56:54.263)
We're on bungee's chords, because they want to retain. Retention is the thing. But she needs a bungee.
Matt (56:58.162)
Thank you, there we go, yeah. The bungee cord helps you come back, yeah. Free bungee, free bungees. No, that's good, I'm really glad that Headspace won the Meditation F4, so that's really important. Okay, I think we nailed it. I do wanna go a bit further into the eye care, if we could. We see that Donald Gleason gets brand new eyes.
Luciano (56:59.618)
Right. Right.
Free bungees
Chris (57:09.931)
Mm.
Chris (57:15.831)
Hmm.
Luciano (57:22.702)
True.
Chris (57:23.222)
Mm-hmm.
Matt (57:23.294)
I don't know if he's using them effectively, what was just stereo computer screens, but maybe there are other features that I don't know of that come with the eyes, and so maybe other people should have the eyes just on him.
Chris (57:26.721)
Hmm.
Luciano (57:35.703)
Hmm
Chris (57:36.417)
Can you enhance that? Can you enhance that? Can you enhance? Enhance. And then he would enhance and then translate. Yeah.
Spencer (57:39.026)
Hints.
Luciano (57:43.018)
It seemed like he was doing some zoom stuff at like random moments for no reason. Yeah.
Chris (57:48.843)
You
Spencer (57:49.182)
But was it just doing what an eye does? Because that's kind what an eye does too.
Luciano (57:54.03)
True. But maybe he has more control over it? Maybe that's why like to... No, nobody does. Not the aperture of the pupils, you don't. it's cosmetic.
Matt (57:58.652)
You don't have full control over your eyes? You got one that's just doing his own thing?
Spencer (58:01.653)
Hahaha!
Chris (58:05.318)
what does that mean?
Matt (58:09.362)
Yeah, but what is that getting him? He's just staring at fucking computer screens. okay. I don't think he wanted it based on the movies to...
Spencer (58:14.196)
It's weirdly cosmetic.
Chris (58:14.58)
Is it cosmetic?
Luciano (58:15.182)
He wanted anime eyes and that's what they got. What do mean? Just... Just because he was being held down as the eyes were being removed.
Spencer (58:20.852)
He got anime eyes.
Chris (58:21.601)
think it's the... I think it's the...
Chris (58:27.839)
Yeah, I think it's a perk of his position so that he doesn't get fatigued anymore because like someone, someone, like his title, the role is called Clan Techie. So like he looks like he's a prisoner there.
Luciano (58:31.64)
Position, yeah.
Luciano (58:41.124)
Yeah, the man gets new eyes but doesn't get a name.
Spencer (58:45.14)
I'd like to think that instead of her just having a feed of the screen in her office, she's a feed from his eyes looking at the screen.
Chris (58:45.311)
Nah.
Matt (58:54.001)
Okay.
Luciano (58:54.515)
That is creepy as fuck. Yes.
Matt (58:57.126)
I'm very believable.
Spencer (58:59.38)
I mean, don't know why, if you could just get a direct feed of what he's looking at.
Chris (59:02.443)
Yeah... That would suck.
Luciano (59:02.572)
Yeah, creepy for him, I mean. Yeah. I just think that he cried too much and she was like, give him some eyes that can cry. That's what happened.
Matt (59:02.865)
But want to know what he's up to, right? You're crazy.
Chris (59:11.038)
Uh-huh.
Spencer (59:11.922)
If you were overthinking it, maybe she, had beautiful eyes and she just wanted his eyes.
Luciano (59:16.746)
on her mental or something.
Matt (59:19.631)
Fair Spencer, but I feel like the best way to get someone's eyes out of their face isn't to crush them into their sockets
Spencer (59:24.83)
You know what?
Chris (59:25.12)
She converted them into medicine balls. Tinglingling.
Luciano (59:29.752)
She's not a woman of nuance, mama. Not really. Yeah.
Matt (59:34.002)
Yeah. Okay. No, it's.
Chris (59:36.129)
She has to unwind somehow and keep her pan calisthenics up so she can use the violence.
Matt (59:39.41)
But that doesn't answer what features the eyes have. You're just talking about momma's.
Luciano (59:43.374)
So they don't, they can't They, yeah. Livestream. What else? They get 64 GB for MP3s.
Chris (59:43.731)
Zooming, fatigue, no tears.
Matt (59:45.756)
Yeah, no fatigue. Yeah.
Spencer (59:48.582)
live stream.
Chris (59:50.572)
huh. Heat mapping.
Spencer (59:59.144)
Wi-Fi enabled, Bluetooth.
Luciano (01:00:00.012)
Wi-Fi enabled, yeah. Bluetooth, yeah. Yeah, you can, yeah, can like put, can do like, you know how you know how watches have watch faces? He has eye faces. Yeah.
Matt (01:00:00.263)
Yep.
Chris (01:00:00.381)
MP3s. Yes.
Matt (01:00:03.466)
I guess you could change the colors, would assume. 16.9 million color options. Yeah.
Chris (01:00:06.335)
Yeah?
Spencer (01:00:08.592)
RGB.
Chris (01:00:11.418)
sRGB sRGB
Matt (01:00:16.03)
Okay, bye. Yeah, that was great. Yeah.
Chris (01:00:16.245)
What the fuck is... So like, emojis?
Luciano (01:00:20.96)
Yeah, he can put there whatever he wants.
Spencer (01:00:24.638)
10g which I assume that's what they're up to at that point.
Luciano (01:00:25.804)
Yeah, can make calls, can make phone calls with his eyes. Yeah.
Matt (01:00:28.188)
Yeah.
Chris (01:00:29.281)
So he has to talk with his eyes? Can you hear me now? God damn it, I put this request in three times already and my sub-appizer is up to my ear!
Matt (01:00:31.388)
Yeah. He Blake, he blinks in Morse code.
You
Luciano (01:00:44.918)
Why do you think he always looks like he's constipated? It's a hard thing to use those eyes.
Matt (01:00:45.232)
You
Chris (01:00:47.831)
Yeah
Chris (01:00:51.479)
So does he shit through his eyes too?
Luciano (01:00:52.587)
Yeah, of course!
Matt (01:00:53.342)
That's not right.
Spencer (01:00:54.1)
Too far, too far.
Luciano (01:00:55.938)
That wasn't what I was saying, but it is now.
Matt (01:00:58.143)
We're moving on! We're moving on.
We're off. We're moving on. We're moving on. We don't want to watch Chris shit any longer. Hey. Yeah, but you didn't. I don't want to go there. It's fine. You.
Chris (01:01:11.21)
his eyes!
Chris (01:01:15.531)
We're on video now. You can't stop it. Can't stop it.
Luciano (01:01:16.053)
I was gonna say he was watching himself shit.
Matt (01:01:20.998)
Yeah, he was just pooping out his butt, looking out of his eyes. He did it wrong. You did it wrong. Anyways, we're not going there. Judge Anderson retires from the police force, it looks like, when she hands in her badge. What happens? Like, what happens the next day in Judge Anderson's life? Like, she quits?
Chris (01:01:23.415)
wow!
Luciano (01:01:23.649)
Yeah.
Chris (01:01:32.567)
She had enough.
Luciano (01:01:33.23)
Mm-hmm.
Luciano (01:01:38.427)
They never tell her, right? She walked away. Yeah, she handed the bag and washed away.
Spencer (01:01:40.5)
No, did she quit? Yeah, she's but she's like, I assume I failed. She didn't quit. She's like, I know I failed.
Matt (01:01:41.704)
Well, she handed her passion.
Chris (01:01:43.393)
She thought she failed.
Matt (01:01:47.612)
Well, this is the question. I don't- you tell me, like, what happens the next day? She- she looked him dead in the eyes, turned in the badge, said, I know I failed, and fucked off. So...
Luciano (01:01:56.012)
Walk the way.
Spencer (01:01:57.588)
And then she's like, you actually passed, but she was already gone.
Chris (01:01:57.663)
Yeah. We don't know.
Luciano (01:01:59.842)
But how does she know she passed? she doesn't go back.
Spencer (01:02:02.59)
She doesn't.
Chris (01:02:03.573)
And we have no idea how much time passed. So I know what she did as soon as she handed her badge and she became a graphic designer on Mars.
Luciano (01:02:12.109)
Wait, what?
Matt (01:02:13.342)
Okay, why?
Chris (01:02:13.557)
Yeah, she had to make, she's gotta make ends meet somehow. And she's like, with my psychic abilities, I've got to, I'll be able to like tap into all my stakeholders' fucking feedback and finally understand what they want. I gotta use this ability somehow, make this bacon.
Matt (01:02:29.746)
But why Mars?
Luciano (01:02:31.497)
Why graphic designer?
Chris (01:02:32.267)
because it's the last frontier.
Spencer (01:02:34.878)
That's good answer.
Matt (01:02:34.958)
Is it? I don't know. You're right. You know, I don't know. I'm questioning it. Sure.
Chris (01:02:36.855)
Yes! You know, booming, Earth is, Earth is, is like, it's the pizza crust that no one wants to eat.
Luciano (01:02:39.446)
It's where all the jobs are, that's why.
Yeah.
Luciano (01:02:53.006)
Okay, that was an analogy.
Spencer (01:02:53.8)
Domino's? Do they have casinos?
Chris (01:02:55.499)
Davidos is doing pretty good these days.
Matt (01:02:57.416)
Hey man, just no.
Luciano (01:02:59.146)
What?
Chris (01:02:59.819)
We gotta get some kind of monetization back here.
Matt (01:03:02.322)
Now let's say P.A.S.
Chris (01:03:05.323)
You're right.
Luciano (01:03:06.797)
What, in Mars?
Matt (01:03:06.993)
and
Spencer (01:03:08.082)
in, in mega city, whatever.
Matt (01:03:10.236)
Well Spencer, I'm gonna let you create whatever you need to to make this answer work because probably...
Chris (01:03:10.571)
Mega City 1.
Spencer (01:03:17.224)
I mean, if I were, I mean, I assume she would maybe get into some poker with mind reading. It's a pretty sure fire way to make some cash.
Matt (01:03:26.43)
Yeah, I think the World Series of Poker still happens annually.
Luciano (01:03:26.467)
Yeah.
Spencer (01:03:29.16)
Perfect. So after winning the World Series of Poker, it comes out that she's a mutant and she has a big downfall. She's canceled in a world with 96 % crime rate. They have no place for cheating in gambling. That's where they draw the line. And then she falls on hard times, gets addicted to slow-mo.
Matt (01:03:34.0)
Right.
Luciano (01:03:36.398)
just canceled.
Chris (01:03:39.215)
wow.
Luciano (01:03:42.285)
Hahaha!
No, that's where they draw the line. Yeah.
Chris (01:03:46.039)
Mmm.
Matt (01:03:46.504)
Well, obviously.
Chris (01:03:52.065)
Mm-hmm. But then... Mm-hmm.
Spencer (01:03:53.896)
Get sober.
Luciano (01:03:55.117)
Right.
Spencer (01:03:57.17)
gets back into the World Series of poker, but she tries to win without her powers to prove that she's just that good. But she gets destroyed because she just cannot because she's not naturally very good at the game. She's not really that great. And it immediately falls back into the slow mo.
Chris (01:03:59.531)
then
Luciano (01:04:05.666)
that she's just that good. Right. And she can't. Yeah. She just doesn't even know the rules. Yeah.
Chris (01:04:08.407)
Hmm. And then?
Matt (01:04:18.303)
She doesn't know what's happening,
Spencer (01:04:27.592)
And then.
Luciano (01:04:28.342)
becomes moves to peach trees and becomes the new mama.
Spencer (01:04:33.555)
and how did you know?
Luciano (01:04:35.672)
Just these things right themselves.
Matt (01:04:37.875)
They really do.
Spencer (01:04:38.022)
And then she faces off against Dread in the sequel.
Luciano (01:04:40.823)
Yeah.
Matt (01:04:40.99)
That's definitely a possible answer.
Chris (01:04:43.072)
Luciano (01:04:46.51)
Dread 2, more dread.
Spencer (01:04:47.302)
It's not a possible answer, it's my answer.
Matt (01:04:51.07)
Moving on. Let's see.
Luciano (01:04:52.269)
How can I top that answer? You can't. Also don't want to.
Chris (01:04:58.881)
Give it the old mutant try.
Matt (01:05:00.705)
It's like you don't want to participate in the podcast you're part of.
Chris (01:05:03.297)
You
Luciano (01:05:03.662)
No, just not in this dumb question.
Matt (01:05:07.123)
They're all dumb questions.
Luciano (01:05:08.694)
Yeah, that's why I said this dumb question. Okay.
Matt (01:05:10.906)
Okay, you did say that. That's fair. Okay, I got a different type of question for you then Luciano. Judge Shred becomes a time cop. Where does he go?
Luciano (01:05:18.978)
where or when? Okay, I walked into that one. So he goes back in time. Professional podcaster here. But he goes back to like the 1930s.
Matt (01:05:29.148)
Nice. Good job.
Luciano (01:05:39.494)
and because he secretly thinks that like the way things are right now is Hitler's fault so he goes back in time but then he starts getting to his own head he's like I'm not gonna just kill Hitler that's gonna be too much yeah so I'm gonna go back and kill Hitler's mom no his aunt just so that his mom let me finish
Matt (01:05:49.851)
obviously.
Matt (01:05:56.968)
too obvious. yeah, that one.
Matt (01:06:06.398)
Sorry, sorry, just to be clear. Hitler's aunt or Judge Redd's aunt? Okay. Whoa.
Luciano (01:06:08.962)
He go. Yeah. Hitler's and his own. Yes. They're the same person because you don't know his name. His name is Dredd which is to think of you think about it. Shut up. Shut up. No, names, two names, because if you think about Dredd Hitler is a dope villain name. But, you know, whatever. Of course it is in my world. It is.
Chris (01:06:15.573)
What? To answer the mom of the same person?
Spencer (01:06:15.7)
What a twist
Spencer (01:06:20.916)
Wait, Dread's his last name.
Matt (01:06:22.078)
Is it hyphenated and it's too long for the badge?
Chris (01:06:23.285)
What's happening?
Matt (01:06:31.752)
Yeah, but his first name isn't Dread. No, it's not. But in... Okay.
Spencer (01:06:38.034)
Everyone knows his first name's Judge.
Chris (01:06:38.165)
He's cooking and I can't stop him.
Luciano (01:06:39.587)
So his first name is Judge, his last name is Dread. Is that what you're saying?
Spencer (01:06:44.349)
Yeah.
Matt (01:06:44.57)
It's I think it's John, but I'll look it up. I'll look it up.
Luciano (01:06:47.52)
is it? Okay. Anyway, he goes back to the 30s and he kills his aunt Hitler's aunt in an attempt to get Hitler's future mom so distraught that she miscarries the child.
Spencer (01:06:48.926)
Judge John Dredd.
Chris (01:06:48.983)
Keep going, Luciano, you've untapped your potential.
Chris (01:06:57.909)
He kills his own aunt?
Matt (01:06:59.708)
Yeah, you're not listening?
Matt (01:07:07.102)
So he went back to the 1930s to kill Hitler's mom's aunt. But, okay, because yeah, Hitler's, yeah. It's Joseph Dredd, by the way, not John. Yeah, that's why they go to the Jiu cubes.
Luciano (01:07:10.24)
Yeah, he miscalculated because he was born already.
Joseph dread. Joe Joseph Adolf almost the same thing. Yeah so that's that's where he goes he goes to the 1930s by mistake and he kills his own aunt who's also Hitler's aunt.
Spencer (01:07:21.425)
You
Matt (01:07:22.557)
Ha ha ha.
Chris (01:07:28.011)
I knew you had it in you, Luciana.
Matt (01:07:34.236)
Makes sense, obviously. 100%. Just because of what we do here, let's just get a different opinion. Spencer, do you have any different ideas?
Luciano (01:07:35.342)
It does?
Luciano (01:07:41.206)
Okay, that's fair, no that's fair, that's fair.
Spencer (01:07:45.522)
Yeah, I think Judge Dredd would go back to Pine Valley, 1984.
Luciano (01:07:51.976)
Hahaha
Spencer (01:07:53.786)
and he would immediately accidentally run into his parents. And then he would see his father almost get hit by a car and he'd push him out of the way taking a spot and would meet his own mother. But that was the way that his father was supposed to.
Luciano (01:08:00.494)
Mmm.
Chris (01:08:03.361)
Gyoji!
Matt (01:08:10.398)
84 or 54?
Luciano (01:08:13.838)
84 in his case.
Chris (01:08:15.031)
It's all the past.
Luciano (01:08:21.046)
When? Hold on, hold on. When does dread take place? What, like, which century?
Matt (01:08:29.406)
care. Yes.
Luciano (01:08:31.895)
Nice.
Chris (01:08:33.398)
Yeah.
Spencer (01:08:33.748)
The 22nd century?
Luciano (01:08:35.648)
I think it is, yeah.
Matt (01:08:38.888)
Keep talking, I'll tell you when I find it.
Luciano (01:08:39.864)
So my point is even if it was 84 then parents were old. Okay. I like it.
Spencer (01:08:44.092)
No, he goes back to 2054. But everything happens the exact same.
Luciano (01:08:50.998)
Even like the dance, the music is all the same. Okay.
Spencer (01:08:52.828)
The dance, yep, Huey Lewis.
Matt (01:08:55.23)
2099 is when the stories start taking place.
Luciano (01:08:58.679)
Okay.
Spencer (01:08:58.952)
Perfect. So he goes back to 2054, meets his mom. He's wearing Calvin Klein. She calls him Calvin.
He has a friend named Doc Beige.
Luciano (01:09:10.05)
That I okay now I don't believe it anymore. He has a friend dread. Come on.
Spencer (01:09:15.444)
Sorry. It's his. It's it's Hitler's aunt, no. Also his aunt. And then they have to then he has to get his parents back together in order to make sure he is born. And they fall in love at the end of the sea dance and dread steps on stage and plays some synth rock from the future.
Luciano (01:09:18.614)
an acquaintance.
Matt (01:09:23.582)
Yeah, yeah, thank you.
Luciano (01:09:24.056)
Okay, now it's believable.
Luciano (01:09:44.849)
Hahahaha!
Spencer (01:09:45.396)
He says, you're not ready for that yet, but your kids are going to love it.
Luciano (01:09:52.118)
Yeah, name of the song is Joseph Be Good.
Matt (01:09:56.03)
Wow.
Chris (01:09:56.471)
NNNN
Luciano (01:09:57.326)
You
Spencer (01:09:57.98)
And then the guy goes, hey Skrillex, you know that sound you've been looking for? Well, listen to this. The end. Thank you. I know, it really just came to me.
Matt (01:10:01.394)
hahahahah
Luciano (01:10:03.894)
Listen to this!
Matt (01:10:08.872)
The end. Great work, Chris.
Luciano (01:10:09.87)
What an original idea, great, I loved it. I loved it.
Matt (01:10:13.15)
Chris, Chris, your turn. I need something from you as well.
Chris (01:10:14.389)
Yeah.
Chris (01:10:19.575)
Dread travels back to June 12, 1972 in New Orleans, Louisiana. Shut the fuck up, and this is my goddamn time now. Give me the microphone. Put the camera on me.
Matt (01:10:25.488)
god.
Luciano (01:10:25.522)
no.
Spencer (01:10:27.25)
boy.
How many times- how many times is Buttermilk Biscuit gonna be said?
Chris (01:10:35.671)
Don't you get ahead of me, God damn it. is my time. Where one Al Copeland, not at one one Al Copeland, a burgeoning entrepreneur looking to step out on his own and make something with his own two hands. And thus Popeyes was born. I Googled this, it's 1972 by one Al Copeland and Dred just like, I'm tired of these butthole biscuits infecting our streets.
Spencer (01:10:37.204)
You're in 1972.
Luciano (01:11:01.25)
There you go.
Chris (01:11:02.711)
in 2099 slow mo biscuits code name death no judgment is coming al you've been judged and he shoves a bucket of buttermilk biscuits in his mouth causing him to suffocate thus eradicating Popeyes and its effect on our population's health both in the past and towards his future thus present
Luciano (01:11:26.478)
So what you're saying is he destroyed Popeyes and that's why there's a dystopian future? I think I can understand that,
Chris (01:11:32.545)
Correct.
Matt (01:11:36.38)
Wait, he created the dystopian future? He created the dystopian future? It's cyclical.
Chris (01:11:36.849)
Yeah!
Luciano (01:11:41.9)
Yeah. Yeah.
Spencer (01:11:42.676)
It's a, yeah, it's a, a, it's a paradox.
Chris (01:11:44.8)
It's a fixed point.
Luciano (01:11:46.242)
Yeah, it's a loop, a fixed time loop. I request no follow up questions. Please don't ask anything.
Matt (01:11:48.414)
Okay, great. no, no, no, no, no further questions. I have nothing else to ask that is clear and concise as it could be. I'll understand. I think that's true. I have one final question. Moving along quickly. Hey, listen, we see the law bringer, the gun here to its thing.
Spencer (01:11:49.544)
I request no follow up questions please.
Chris (01:11:51.895)
It's the clearest I've ever been, probably.
Spencer (01:11:58.932)
It's very clear we all understand.
Luciano (01:11:59.822)
Probably, yeah.
Spencer (01:12:04.86)
No doubt, no doubt, moving on.
Chris (01:12:06.615)
Let it live.
Matt (01:12:19.166)
Many times, it's very cool. It's all of her favorite scenes are powered by it. what I want to know is, I want to compare it to some other classical weapons we see in movies. So hypothetical situation, you need to rescue Morpheus and you are not the one, obviously. Would you pick the lawbringer or the auto nine Robocop's gun or maybe the Zorg ZF-1 from Fifth Element to get this job done?
Luciano (01:12:36.344)
Okay.
Luciano (01:12:43.682)
Fifth element,
Okay, it is tough.
Spencer (01:12:48.564)
That's tough. That's tough. I'm gonna be honest. I don't think you're getting that job done with any of them, but I'm gonna give you my best answer.
Luciano (01:12:52.429)
Hmm.
Doesn't matter what you do, you get in, get immediately killed.
Chris (01:13:01.086)
you
Spencer (01:13:01.748)
Can I just, can I get a clarification? Is this pre lobby or post lobby?
Matt (01:13:09.498)
No, right from the beginning of the job. So pre-lobby. And just to be clear, I messed up the name. The lawbringer is the motorcycle. The lawgiver is the pistol. My bad.
Spencer (01:13:12.71)
So, so walk, you're walking in.
Luciano (01:13:13.858)
The Lobby.
Spencer (01:13:20.786)
Okay.
Luciano (01:13:24.972)
I don't think that changes much, but.
Spencer (01:13:25.172)
So this is like, so you're walking in and the guys with all the guards come out and they go freeze. And then like some, yeah, late 90s dance, yeah, some late 90s dance music's gonna play. Okay, I have all the facts. You guys have an answer?
Chris (01:13:32.759)
and then...
Luciano (01:13:33.496)
Yeah.
Luciano (01:13:41.358)
Go for it.
Chris (01:13:42.219)
I believe so.
Spencer (01:13:44.136)
I think the one that gives you the best shot. I mean, the Robocop gun is a powerful pistol, but it's not going to get enough action off for the amount of people you're dealing with.
Matt (01:13:51.328)
No, I don't think so.
And you are not a robot or a cop.
Spencer (01:13:56.402)
And you're not a robot. I think it's a tough choice between the lawgiver and the, was it the Zerg? Was it the Zorg?
Matt (01:14:02.598)
Zorg.
Luciano (01:14:03.446)
if I- can I bring the Zerg? I will bring the Zerg with me! Yeah. No, from StarCraft.
Matt (01:14:05.694)
Problem solved.
Spencer (01:14:07.348)
I think I'm gonna have to go with Dissorg because it has I mean, this is off the top of my head, but you correct me if I'm wrong. It has ice auto aim, like a fully automatic. It's got flamethrower ice, like liquid nitrogen blower. Please give me all the perks of the. Thank you.
Chris (01:14:07.735)
from Toy Story.
Okay, that was thinking of some-
Matt (01:14:19.102)
Sure.
Luciano (01:14:22.753)
Auto aim.
Matt (01:14:31.4)
Do you want me to tell you what it has here? have the listing, the technical readout as it were. We have the replay button, so once you shoot somewhere you can fire the bullets wherever you need to go. We have the rocket launcher, we have the arrow launcher, we have a net launcher, we have a flamethrower, and we have the ice cube system.
Chris (01:14:33.303)
That would help.
Spencer (01:14:41.534)
Perfect.
Luciano (01:14:49.203)
so it shoots, it maims, dices and it makes drinks.
Spencer (01:14:50.504)
That's not everything. Did you mention that? What about the net? What about the net?
Matt (01:14:52.936)
That's the... I went... I went... Yeah, I said Net Launcher. I went to fifthevement.fandom.com So that's the most reputable place on the internet.
Chris (01:14:53.227)
Thursday. Thursday for justice.
Spencer (01:14:58.177)
no, I didn't hear that. Okay.
Luciano (01:15:01.838)
Ayyyy our best sponsors! Yeah of course yeah there's no doubting what they say
Spencer (01:15:03.58)
Okay.
Spencer (01:15:07.422)
So I think the best case scenario is you use the Zerg or Zorg, you shoot a gun, one bullet in the middle of the room, like on the floor, and then you just use the replay button and run in circles. Like run around them. And that way you don't have to, you can just like run without like being a hard target to hit while technically everyone is in a blender. Now, once you get up to Morpheus, you're still fucked.
Matt (01:15:17.03)
Right. Yeah.
Spencer (01:15:35.758)
I don't think much is going to work against the agents, but maybe that maybe the net. Just tie him up. Yeah, right. You're not the one. Loose netting. Dodge this looks really.
Matt (01:15:39.058)
You did what you could. Until the agent becomes you, you're fucked.
Luciano (01:15:41.23)
They're super... They're super fast but they are weak against twine.
Matt (01:15:51.598)
Yeah.
Chris (01:15:53.501)
weakness!
Luciano (01:15:56.905)
Hahaha!
Chris (01:16:00.363)
My fetish. I don't want to dash this, it's also my fetish.
Luciano (01:16:01.208)
Yeah
Spencer (01:16:04.98)
Really slow net. Dodge this. Fump!
Luciano (01:16:08.534)
Hahaha
Matt (01:16:08.638)
Chris, what would you pick?
Chris (01:16:13.847)
It's very tough.
the zorg but for for diversity i think i i don't know i'm i'm really drawn to robocop's gun to be honest yes please tell me
Matt (01:16:26.494)
You want to know what Robocop is packing? Armor piercing, high explosive, non-lethal, something they call a seeker. He has a standard round. And there's also, I don't know how to say this, but flechette. Yeah.
Luciano (01:16:41.454)
the shit.
Chris (01:16:43.383)
Is that red flesh, I guess?
Spencer (01:16:43.518)
What's that? Is that also a net? It's so I picked that one.
Luciano (01:16:47.566)
No, I think it's like bigger projectiles, no?
Matt (01:16:48.413)
Let's find out.
Matt (01:16:54.064)
It's a, yeah, a fin stabilized steel projectile.
Luciano (01:16:57.132)
Yeah, it's like a lot. He uses in the other movies, not in the first one.
Spencer (01:16:57.716)
Am I crazy or does he not use any of this in the movie?
Chris (01:17:00.673)
isn't.
Matt (01:17:01.884)
Yeah, and the first one he just uses basically the armor piercing. Yeah.
Spencer (01:17:04.116)
He just used his gun.
Luciano (01:17:04.224)
Armor, armor piercing and the regular one. Yeah. Yeah.
Chris (01:17:07.799)
Huh, I wanna go with that weapon because it's, there's more to it than meets the eye. Ha ha ha ha. Silence! Yeah, I know. I just wanted to say it. going into, walking into that scenario, okay, well, this person's, I have no Teflon bulletproof vesting, right? Thank you, Bruce.
Luciano (01:17:15.134)
Pfft!
Matt (01:17:16.486)
to completely different, you know, wow.
Spencer (01:17:18.602)
Everything.
Luciano (01:17:19.553)
Yeah.
Matt (01:17:31.068)
dog barks
Chris (01:17:34.775)
confirming my humanity and fragility. I'm gonna take some shots in this. I'm gonna take some damage in this gunfight, but I think my first move would be to take out the lights and then use every ability I have in this gun, with this firearm to try and handicap, like take everybody out from the knees as best as possible. And then...
Do a lot of rolling, a lot of rolling, like a biscuit. gonna roll and roll and roll and roll and and roll. Yeah, just like. And keep moving, because I don't think running is gonna do it. They'll be like, we can't see. Money, money, money. I think that's gonna be my only strategy, because most of the time in action, like gunfights, everybody is aiming from the waist up.
Spencer (01:18:06.676)
Rollin' rollin' rollin' rollin' That's the music that's playin'
Luciano (01:18:07.31)
rolling rolling yeah it's the it's the rawhide maneuver
Matt (01:18:08.174)
What?
Chris (01:18:34.549)
Not many people are going for the feet. If you can't stand, you can't fight.
Matt (01:18:37.746)
Hey Chris, Chris.
Spencer (01:18:38.014)
fitting. It's fitting for you to go for the gonads with the robo cop gun.
Luciano (01:18:42.028)
Hahaha!
Chris (01:18:42.135)
I'm
Matt (01:18:43.358)
The one thing I'll say about why people generally don't shoot people in the leg is when other people have guns and you shoot them in the leg, they can still shoot back. So there is that.
Chris (01:18:53.867)
Yeah, but that's not what we're... I yield my tape.
Luciano (01:18:55.854)
He did he did say he was not gonna survive long
Spencer (01:18:57.172)
He's like, I you, but... ROLLIN', ROLLIN', ROLLIN', ROLLIN'!
Chris (01:18:59.925)
I said I'm gonna take some damage, but...
Matt (01:18:59.986)
Well...
What
Luciano (01:19:04.147)
Hahahaha!
Chris (01:19:04.567)
That the sea is gonna open up like lights and then start rolling
Matt (01:19:13.982)
All right, you yielded your time. Luciano.
Luciano (01:19:16.77)
I would definitely pick the lawgiver. you know how, when you give a kid a new toy or like a new electronic that they have no idea how to use it, they just press all of the buttons. That's what I would do. I would just start yelling all of the bullet types and shoot, like just shooting randomly just to see what happens. I know I'm going to die. I'm not going to get through that lobby alive. I'm not the one I can do pirouettes. So I'm just going to have fun with that gun.
Matt (01:19:29.715)
Mm-hmm.
Spencer (01:19:43.518)
You know what though?
I was actually thinking, I think that the logger gives you the best choice too. If you just go with the incendiary, you walk in and just go phosphorus, you got a chance. Cause it's going to just fuck them all up. Yeah. It's going to take off the whole floor.
Luciano (01:19:53.294)
Just walk in the lobby Just carpet bomb the whole fucking place maybe yeah
Matt (01:19:56.115)
Yep.
Matt (01:20:01.118)
Here's what you do, this is why I would also pick the Log Giver. Not just because it's the best gun here, but because you phosphorous the room and there's all those pillars, right? Well, you just high explode all those pillars and the phosphorous the room, everyone's clearly dead and...
Luciano (01:20:10.796)
Right. Yeah.
Yeah.
You're basically like UV'd the room, like it's clear of bacteria, it's clear of everything.
Matt (01:20:21.576)
Yeah.
Spencer (01:20:24.25)
I thought you were trying to take out the entire building? You're taking out the base?
Matt (01:20:29.208)
I mean, listen, it's fine. Yeah, well, when he falls to the first floor, it'll be easy to get him.
Chris (01:20:29.559)
Mm, collapse.
Spencer (01:20:31.636)
The mission is to save Morpheus. Not obliterate him. Yeah, we've saved him from death.
Luciano (01:20:39.796)
No, the mission is to save him is to save him from the agents you save him from the agents by killing him first it works
Spencer (01:20:48.562)
I they could have unplugged him. I mean, that is disgusting in the film. Anyways.
Matt (01:20:53.448)
So there's my answer. We're at the end of this podcast. Before we go, we'd to leave a rating on it. I am going to go first and say it's an STR rating movie because I picked it and I love it. And of course I would say that, but let's get the rest of you guys to see how right or wrong you fuckers are. Chris, why don't you go first? I feel like you're the worst one here. I mean, the most interesting one here.
Luciano (01:20:53.506)
Yeah.
Luciano (01:21:16.926)
Wow. Savage. Holy shit. That was so uncalled for. I love it.
Spencer (01:21:18.15)
Whoa.
Chris (01:21:23.006)
What's this? So, okay. It would have been cool if, I mean, we planned this, but at the same time, this is re-education month, and so having seen the previous Dread is not necessary, therefore, I will not compare the two. This movie was really good. I like tower action movies, done well. And Carl Urban deserved another go at this, but then...
Matt (01:21:24.284)
Ha ha ha ha.
Spencer (01:21:27.971)
Ha ha ha.
Chris (01:21:50.505)
since it was a good standalone movie, it's like, how do you beat what's been done, right? Like, of course he deserved another one. It deserved another one. 2012 is such a long time ago. Like, they should have done it immediately. Anyways, for me, this ranking, and like, yes, you should totally watch this movie, viewers, do it. Don't hesitate. My rating.
Matt (01:21:54.758)
Yes. Yeah.
Chris (01:22:17.556)
S. This is an S movie. It's only, that's what you get for shitting on me with your eyes.
Spencer (01:22:18.772)
Whoa. Now you're eating. You're eating your words now, Matt.
Matt (01:22:19.484)
Holy shit. I take everything back I've ever said about you.
Yeah, I got what I wanted. Perfect. Moving on. Luciano.
Spencer (01:22:25.319)
it.
Luciano (01:22:27.278)
Wait. I had only watched this movie maybe twice before last time I watched it. Or before I watched it this time again for the podcast. And I remember enjoying it both times. It doesn't age as well as I thought it would, but it's still pretty good. Even the CG doesn't detract. And the acting...
The acting is at the level it needs to be, which is something we don't talk about. A lot of the times, you know, some movies have overacting in the sense that people try to make it more serious than it needs to be. And here, I think it's the right level of seriousness. There's a couple of problems with the movie, like little nitpicks that we actually ended up not touching on, but there's, you know, the whole psychic thing that comes and goes as the plot needs it and so on and so forth. they don't, I don't...
Matt (01:23:18.846)
because it's perfect.
Matt (01:23:24.53)
Are you a psychic? You know how the powers work? No. Just keep giving your answer. I predict you're gonna shut the fuck up and give your ranking.
Luciano (01:23:26.368)
I don't think shut the fuck up. This is my time.
Spencer (01:23:28.702)
Yeah, I'm a psychic. you.
Chris (01:23:28.759)
Roll it, roll it,
Luciano (01:23:33.164)
This is my, this is my time.
Luciano (01:23:38.548)
And, I think you should shut the fuck up and let me talk.
Matt (01:23:41.852)
I knew you'd say that.
Spencer (01:23:42.196)
Ugh.
Chris (01:23:43.447)
Biscuits!
Luciano (01:23:44.6)
You don't have to be psychic to know that though. I'm torn between an A and a B, but I'm going to give it an A because I think it comes, like it knows what it wants to do and it does it well. It doesn't try to be more, like you said Matt earlier, like it doesn't try to be super serious. It doesn't try to be philosophical or anything. It just comes in and makes some criticism, throw some explosions in our face and gets out. And I think that's commendable. So A.
Matt (01:23:46.694)
Yeah
Matt (01:24:11.378)
Huzzah. Well, Spencer, we got the ass rating. give me one more. Give me one more ass. Come on. Come on, big boy. Let's do it.
Luciano (01:24:15.862)
hahahahah
Chris (01:24:17.495)
don't know how to feel about that. I'm not comfortable with this.
Spencer (01:24:17.83)
I'm,
Okay, let me just, okay. I have seen this movie once for a long time ago, soon after it came out. And I remember when I saw it, I heard about how great it was. was like, got a lot of people saying how awesome it is. And same thing happened when I watched it this time. Everyone's saying how great it Matt obviously loves that he picked it. And I left feeling the same thing both times, which is, I feel like it was overhyped.
Like it's a good movie if you went in not expecting it to be a good movie. It goes better than I thought it was. But when you go and thinking it's going to be great, like it does fall short of that. find it feels like like I find the budget does show. And I do find. You know, it's some issues with.
the action here and there like not much, but it's just a little bit bare bones for me. I like the movie a lot. But it's it's not like one of my top action movies. Shut up. I'm enjoying my eye. And I'm going to have to make this ass a bass.
Chris (01:25:26.135)
Are you on slow mo?
Luciano (01:25:27.33)
hahahahah
Luciano (01:25:38.818)
BASS. A BASS MOVIE.
Matt (01:25:39.016)
You know what, Spencer? I don't know a movie you're watching.
Spencer (01:25:40.404)
to be for me. But fuck, I'm a psychic. I predicted the fuck fast. Good movie, but yeah, not. It didn't wow. It insists upon itself. No, it just didn't didn't wow me. Fun though. Fun movie. Just didn't wow me.
Matt (01:25:45.352)
but I predicted F for your movie.
Chris (01:25:48.49)
Yeah.
Matt (01:25:57.96)
God, this fucking guy. Yeah, we got it. Fuck you.
Luciano (01:26:03.118)
He's personally offended that you don't like the movie.
Spencer (01:26:06.77)
Matt, Matt, it just didn't wow me.
Matt (01:26:10.686)
fine. I predict I'm gonna end this podcast because I'm mad at you. That's the end of this podcast. We've all rated this movie. One of us did a poor job. The rest of us did a great job.
We're gonna continue reeducation month next week. We are doing Luciano's choice. Luciano, what movie do we need to reeducate people on?
Luciano (01:26:28.942)
Yes.
Luciano (01:26:34.734)
People need to, if they haven't watched it, watch it for the first time because it's basically a hate crime if you haven't and if you did watch it, you need to watch The Matrix, the original Matrix again. 1999 Carrie Anne Moss vehicle.
Spencer (01:26:49.684)
You're goddamn right.
Matt (01:26:52.094)
Is this the one with Neopatricaris?
Luciano (01:26:55.892)
No. No. No. Yeah. That's the reason why.
Spencer (01:26:56.756)
How dare you remind me of that movie's existence? you just wanna... Listen, you wanted to hurt me and you succeeded.
Matt (01:27:00.286)
you
Luciano (01:27:05.62)
Yeah, you. Yeah, people need to watch it and understand how fucking amazing it is. Spoilers, but yeah, that's the one.
Chris (01:27:06.497)
Ha ha!
Matt (01:27:06.671)
Eh, done.
Matt (01:27:15.442)
Yeah. All right. Next week, the matrix, there is a 99. Is it that fucking old? God.
Luciano (01:27:20.622)
99 yeah yes 25 year old movie
Spencer (01:27:20.904)
Yep, yeah, fucking yeah, 99.
Chris (01:27:21.463)
feels like.
Matt (01:27:24.702)
That's fine. It's a child that's moved out of Spencer's house. All right, join us next week and we're going to talk and re-educate you on the Matrix. Bye.
Luciano (01:27:27.948)
Hahaha!
Chris (01:27:29.345)
Ha ha ha!
Luciano (01:27:36.184)
Bye.
Spencer (01:27:37.94)
Bye.
Chris (01:27:38.049)
Cheerio.