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Money & Me: Get anything you desire this year 5 Day Audio Program: https://www.soulrichwoman.com/money
I believe we can change the world. But first, we’ve got to stop living in fear of being judged for who we are.
Hi I'm Genecia Alluora, Founder of the #1 Leading Female Entrepreneur Network in South East Asia supporting 1 Million women to Own & LOve The F-Word. Being fabulous, having freedom, financial independence and Family.
With a challenge to women everywhere to stop TALKING themselves out of their dreams, Soul Why? Secrets of The Soul Rich Woman Blueprint identifies the excuses to let go of, the behaviours to adopt, and the skills to acquire on the path to growth, confidence, and believing in yourself to be recognised as a leader online. Get clients online and to have more impact on the world!
Stop Believing THE Lies ABOUT Who You Are so You Can Become Who You Were Meant to Be. You're Just an "F-Word" Away from The Life You Want, The Marriage You Want... The Family That You Want, Is Going To Be Fueled By The Business & Life You Build ... Join me, become a Soul Rich Woman. Alone we are strong, Together we are unstoppable!
Ask Me Anything & get featured on the podcast: https://podinbox.com/genecia
[00:00:00]
Genecia Alluora: This episode is brought to you by Instantpodcastleader.com, the leading platform to launch your podcast in 48 hours and make it profitable. Get your free audiobook and free web class at instantpodcastleader.com/webclass.
[00:00:19]
Genecia Alluora: Hi, I'm Genecia Alluora, founder of Soul Rich Woman, the Number One Leading Female Entrepreneur Network in Southeast Asia, supporting 1 million women to own and love the F word. Fabulous, freedom, financial independence, and happy family. Alone, you are strong. Together we are unstoppable. So go to soulrichwoman.com, grab your free five day online program, Money and Me, how to get anything you desire. Welcome to my show.
[00:00:50]
Genecia Alluora: Hi, and welcome to another episode of Soul Why - Secrets of the Soul Rich Woman Blueprint. I'm honored to spend this time with you. No matter where you're listening, whether it's on your way to work or you're sitting in your office working on your business dreams, or even if you are driving around in the car with your kids, sleeping at the back of the backseat, I have been there many times. So I love seeing your pictures and videos of where you're listening to my podcast. Send those things to me. I love seeing it, and I love hearing from you and your ahas. In today's episode, I want to talk. About three steps to stop people pleasing and create better boundaries.
[00:01:36]
Genecia Alluora: Now, boundaries is a very odd topic because it's so difficult, and sometimes people don't understand what exactly is the boundaries? And it's not popular for people to set this thing called boundaries because if you feel, you will feel that, why do I need to set boundaries? You are friend with me, I'm friend with you, or I love you. Why do I need to set boundaries? Right? Hey, but I just want to highlight this. If you want to do a lot of people pleasing, you can never be yourself. Authenticity comes from a space where you are truly authentic, and you set certain boundaries in order for you to thrive more amazingly. Okay?
[00:02:20]
Genecia Alluora: If you really love to do people pleasing, please go to the zoo and become a panda. Because a panda in Mandarin we say 人见人如人爱. People see people like people love. Okay? All right. So this week, I'm back with a healthy boundaries prescription for you that you can set and start using right away to create your amazing year ahead. A better life, a different life. Now, first of all, I want you to consider are you saying yes to everyone, but saying no to yourself. Learn how to set healthy boundaries and how to stop saying yes and take care of yourself. Now, this is a big challenge for many female entrepreneurs, or even my clients, who are nine to five employees working in their life and on their life. They often gave themselves up to help everybody except themselves.
[00:03:19]
Genecia Alluora: That's right. So why the heck do we always say yes when we really mean no? Now, back when I first started, many years ago, I'm not only I was a chronic yes girl, I will say yes to anything. Yes to all the sponsorships, yes to everything. Meaning that I will offer the sponsorship. I will do pro bono, I will do literally everything possible to please everyone, to get the network. And I worry on a chain around my neck, and I would say yes even before I would think about it and I was committing to it. It was like as if it was on autopilot mode. I would say yes to people and things that even though they make me really unhappy. So, my dear, my gorgeous, so many women are doing the exact same thing for various reasons to avoid hurting other people's feelings. So people don't think you're a bitch. They will think that you are Miss Nice Lady or Mr. Nice Guy to keep the peace. And you are the nicest person on planet Earth. They want to be your friend. Hey. So here's my solution for getting out of the people pleasing trap. All right?
[00:04:36]
Genecia Alluora: Step one decide when you want to work. Do you want to work evenings or weekends or not? What's the earliest or latest that you are happiest working? When do you work best? Can you take a whole day completely off from client work? And it's okay to have your business be exactly the way you want it? There are more than enough clients out there for you. Number two. Create a new policy and inform your clients about it. Just make a simple announcement on your website or newsletter from 1st February, opening hours are XYZ. No apologies or over explaining. It's your business, after all, and you no need to beg for understanding. Just give them notice. Anything up to a month is fine. And that's the end of it. Now, remember, people, make time to see dentist and doctor and see lawyers, all right? You don't have to be super convenient for everyone. I know the fear is that you'll lose all your clients or even your friends. But trust me, that will not happen.
[00:05:45]
Genecia Alluora: You might even free up more time and energy to write a book, create summer programs, go on a holiday. They don't require your time or have energy for some well defined pro bono work. Number three enforce the new boundary. Some people will try to push the new boundary. For example, please, can you do cut reading for me on the weekend? Can you do card reading for me after office hours. Can you make an exception for me? Pretty please? This is common.
[00:07:01]
Genecia Alluora: Can you make an exception for me? This is usually what they say, only for me, please. Trust me, it will happen within 24 hours of you mentally and emotionally making the decision. I bet you $10. And seriously, the first time you enforce it, you'll feel like the biggest bitch in the whole world. But stick to these rules and flow and trust me, you will feel amazing. Now, what's the energy behind being too available? Now, here's something to think about. I used to offer my clients up to 55 to 80 slots a week. Can you imagine? I had maybe ten to 15 clients a week, or maybe even more, which was my idea of a happy workload. So I was just trying to accommodate by offering them appointments anytime from 07:00 a.m. To 05:00 p.m. Five days a week. And now I stopped offering up my other slots, but honestly, it still sucks. One client that said, after seeing all my available appointments on my calendar, made her think that maybe Genecia isn't doing too well, or maybe Genecia needs more clients.
[00:07:36]
Genecia Alluora: Sometimes being too accommodating can backfire as well as making you stressed. However, work through these three steps, and I promise you, you'll start feeling better in your relationships, in your life, in your communication skills, all these will improve and you will start making more money. Or all these will improve and you will have more time for yourself to do the things that matters. All right? I would love to hear from you. Tell me what you are saying yes to that you really don't want to do. Where are you saying no to yourself? Believe me, this is your time and you are ready for the next step.
[00:08:19]
Genecia Alluora: Hey, gorgeous. I can help you to build your dreams. Now you can work with me in my Money Mindset coaching program and mastermind community, Soul Rich Woman. The more you surround yourself with inspiring, successful and supportive people, the more you'll feel safe to dream. Let's clear all the old stories, beliefs and sabotages that are stopping you, holding you back and making you go round and round in circles and not allowing you to create your soul rich life, fabulous freedom, financial independence, and a happy family. It's fun and practical. That is soulrichwoman.com. Or simply email us at hello@soulrichwoman.com. So come and join us.