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Welcome to the Wired to Lead podcast with Julia LeFevre!
ep 29 full
Julia: [00:00:00] I'm Julia LeFevre, and around here we chat about rewiring your brain to lead with clarity, confidence, and impact. Tired of all the leadership advice that you've heard a million times. Well, you're in the right place. Let's get [00:00:15] started. So here's our question for today.
What if human resources wasn't just about policies and compliance, but about restoring trust and belonging across every layer of an organization? So today's guest, Jennifer [00:00:30] Galinsky, is a strategic human resource director and business partner who brings decades of experience across both private and public sectors.
Jennifer's approach goes beyond process. It's about creating workplaces where [00:00:45] people feel safe, valued, and emotionally intelligent enough to grow together. And that's exactly the kind of transformation we champion here at Brave Restoration. So this is why I'm so excited to have this conversation with you, Jennifer.
Welcome [00:01:00] to Wired to Lead.
Jen Golynsky: Thank you, Julie. I'm excited to be here.
Julia: . Okay. Well, you are an HR professional and.
To be honest, there are so many mixed ideas [00:01:15] about what HR is, what it isn't, what you do, what you don't do. And so I'm just curious, what is one belief about HR that you wish every [00:01:30] executive could unlearn?
Jen Golynsky: That's a great question. I think what I'd like them to unlearn is that we don't have, if people think we have all the answers that we are w walking encyclopedias. Of [00:01:45] every law, um, every nuance, and really every situation is different.
Julia: Yeah, I mean, I don't know how you keep up. Partly because laws continue to be made right? And so [00:02:00] it's almost like there is no way you're the all-in-one resource for everything. And so how does that, when people believe that, uh, how does that impact. [00:02:15] Working in the HR world.
Jen Golynsky: Answers has to be, I don't know, but I know where to find the answer.
So there are a lot of great resources out there. There are a lot of great peers. I'm a member of both [00:02:30] the Charlotte Chapter of SH RM and the national chapter, and we call on each other and we ask questions. Um, I have peers across the country and we have group chats and we ask each [00:02:45] other.
Their thoughts or if they've experienced something in particular.
. You also need internal and external partners. We partner very closely with our IT department, our analytics department, our finance department, our legal department. We need [00:03:00] everybody so that we make sure that we aren't missing something. We're not going to know everything. We're not going to be up on everything.
We get emails every day for six different webinars, and if you wanted to [00:03:15] do that, you would be on webinars all day, every day and then not have time to do your work.
Julia: Right. . And so, man, that's a big task. Not only are you, helping to manage people and [00:03:30] working through, um, different, uh, problems and staying on top of all of those things, but now you're trying to be a connector of people and that can get really messy.
Jen Golynsky: It can get messy. [00:03:45] Hi. There's a couple of things to keep in mind. First and foremost, HR people, um, in my opinion are strategic partners, but they're also here to give support and guidance. [00:04:00] So sort of a strategic advisor. And one of the things I learned very on, uh, early on, not to take personally. Is if people don't take your advice, you might wanna document what it is you said, but [00:04:15] then you can't force them to. And sometimes the more you try to convince people of your viewpoint, the more they see you as defensive, when really you're just trying to help. And so you need to be mindful, you know, that's part of the emotional [00:04:30] intelligence of that self-regulation and being mindful of how you're being perceived by others.
Julia: Yeah. Yeah. I'm so glad you brought that up because of course that's a huge area that we work with, uh, at Brave, just to [00:04:45] help establish and build capacity in that space. And so that just leads me. To wonder, you know, as you've been, your career has spanned several decades and you've been [00:05:00] through a lot of the evolution of this, kind of the idea of emotional intelligence and soft skills and power skills, whatever you wanna call them, and I'm just curious, what have you seen and how [00:05:15] have you, uh, helped to grow in that in your own life?
Jen Golynsky: Well, I was fortunate enough to, uh, meet Dr. Izzy Justice, who created EQ Mentor,
and I worked. With him, [00:05:30] uh, when his business was getting off the ground, which he subsequently sold. So I became what they call a certified mentor and emotional intelligence and did online asynchronous, uh, coaching and mentoring. And that really [00:05:45] got me interested. And one of the things that I noticed was that when you're aware of something, like for me. Self-regulation is a big challenge. I wanna keep talking and I wanna keep going, and I wanna try to convince people of things, especially [00:06:00] if either I know it's right or I think it's in the best interest of what we're doing. And once you become aware of that, you become hyper-focused on it. And then you are harder on yourself. Oh, I shouldn't have said that. And or you debate [00:06:15] right? Should I have really said that or should I go ahead and say it now or can I get a do-over on that conversation? And one of the things my executive coach has shared with me is you really have to look at the feedback you're [00:06:30] getting and decide what feedback is important to you and what you're gonna do with it. And that is also part of the self-awareness and self-regulation of emotional intelligence is being able to filter out what's noise. Versus, you know, what's [00:06:45] gonna really help you become a better person, a better listener, um, and a, a better supporter of others.
Julia: Right. We talk about that very thing in, in the idea of [00:07:00] building your capacity to stay defined because awareness, it's such a gift, but it, like you said, it can become paralyzing or shaming. If we're hard on ourselves and we want to do better and we think, [00:07:15] oh, I didn't do better and then, but now I'm questioning and we start.
Sinking into the overthinking cycle and, and so part of being able to grow in EQ is being able to grow your [00:07:30] capacity to kind of separate yourself from the judgment piece of this and being able to be almost be okay with making a mistake.
Jen Golynsky: Well, so that leads us into [00:07:45] having a safe place to fail.
Julia: Yeah,
Jen Golynsky: When I was in graduate school, we used to have this board in our student lounge where people got to nominate people for the loser move of the week. And then,
Julia: I love it.
Jen Golynsky: [00:08:00] yeah, and, and then we would all go out for, you know, a drink on Friday afternoons and celebrate the biggest, you know, biggest loser move and, um. We have a, a great culture that you, you know, you have to nurture the culture. You [00:08:15] have to help people with psychological safety and find out, um, what would help them feel safer. And I think it starts with assuming positive intent. If somebody comes to you, you wanna give them the benefit of the doubt that they're [00:08:30] coming to you with something constructive and then it's meaningful to them. We never know what it takes for somebody else to actually have that conversation or show up in that meeting. And so showing people a little grace, [00:08:45] assuming positive intent is very, very helpful. Um, the other thing is there's so many people now, so many professionals that help with burnout, resilience, self-doubt.
You know, Brene Brown [00:09:00] with her
Dare to lead. Um, has been amazing and there are books and workbooks and so many professional coaches out there that no matter what it is that you [00:09:15] want or you think you need help with, you can find somebody, um, to help you with that.
Julia: Absolutely. I, yeah, I love the. Celebrating The Greatest Loser be partly [00:09:30] because it, it creates that place to work on these things. And I do agree that there's, there's so many resources out there that we can pursue individually, and what all the [00:09:45] brain research is telling us is that. Individual work takes a lot longer and isn't as effective as when you can do the work connected to others who are doing the same work.
And that's why [00:10:00] your example of celebrating the Biggest Loser feels. I mean, it, it almost, you know, it makes us all giggle and we're thinking, oh, that's funny. And it's, it's not a big deal. And yet it's a huge deal because [00:10:15] everyone is showing up for one another in a posture of assuming the best about the person that they're celebrating, who fell flat on their face. And it's that experience with other [00:10:30] people that helps to rewrite. The story in our brain that used to tell us, people will reject you if you make a mistake. And our brain [00:10:45] believes our experiences much more than words. And so just that whole process I always think is, is great. And I'm curious, what are, what are other ways that you have been able to.
[00:11:00] Just help others grow in their eq.
Jen Golynsky: Having honest conversations and being able to listen. One of the questions that I ask people is, am I here to listen? Am I here to problem solve? Am I a [00:11:15] sounding board? What do you need from me? What would be most helpful in this situation? That gives people an one psychological safety, but two, it empowers them to make the decision. And there [00:11:30] are days, right when you just want somebody to listen and then there are days when you say, you know what? This is a problem and I really need to solve it. Um, in my organization we say tackle it. When it's a brush fire, don't let it become a forest fire.
Julia: [00:11:45] Yeah, absolutely. There's such power in gaining clarity on what the other person needs, and I would even advocate and we do advocating for understand what you need [00:12:00] before you go to someone, because how many times do we not even really know? We just bust into an office. Uh, and we vent [00:12:15] thinking, I just need to vent.
But then the person's response to us doesn't meet what we really needed, which was, I need you to help me. Uh, or I don't need you to help. I, I just need to vent. [00:12:30] But we think we're just going, we want them to help us, and then they actually offer us some advice and it just makes us angry.
Jen Golynsky: That is true, and that's part of managing expectations. And we talk about setting clear [00:12:45] agreements. So if you were to come to me, I would say, what would you like to get out of our time together today?
Julia: Oh, that's so helpful.
Sometimes. So I was just working with a client a couple of days ago, and there was a [00:13:00] situation where something like this happened that they were needing something, they needed comfort actually, but they came in angry. [00:13:15] And when someone comes into your office and they're angry. Our brains are wired to kinda be ready to fight back.
Right. And it was interesting that as we process [00:13:30] this later, when the emotions weren't so high, we actually got down to the place where the staff member, she was sad that one of her closest coworkers [00:13:45] was leaving. And she just needed someone to comfort her, but she went in thinking that she wanted the supervisor to fix it.
[00:14:00] And so those are very different. So it's interesting how our brains can sometimes trick us even into under, or thinking we want one thing, but really wanting another. And this is why the supervisor. [00:14:15] HA is working on their capacity to, and you said it earlier, to stay regulated so that when a dysregulated person comes in, they are able [00:14:30] to explore the real issue.
Instead of just trying to fix it or re react back. So I'm just curious, um, yeah. Have you ever found yourself in that [00:14:45] situation where I've had someone come to me and I've had to really work to stay regulated?
Jen Golynsky: Yes. You know? Yes I am. You know. One of the things that we use all the time is the disc.
Julia: Right.
Jen Golynsky: [00:15:00] Um, and I'm a very high eye,
so very extroverted, outgoing. I talk with my hands. I can be very animated and, um, sometimes that overwhelms people. They say that any strength overused can become a [00:15:15] weakness and, and that certainly.
So when somebody comes to me and they're excited, sometimes I get excited. And then you have this energy back and forth and sometimes I have to take a breath and. If we're standing, I will literally take a step backwards and say, [00:15:30] you know, I need to think about this, or I need to process this. Can you give me a minute?
Julia: Hmm.
Jen Golynsky: because it's not always easy, especially if it's an emotional issue
And showing the other person that you're human and that you're not perfect, I think goes [00:15:45] a long way.
Julia: Hmm. as we, we've been chatting here, I, I've just wanted to ask, you know, how, how have you been able to maintain personal boundaries [00:16:00] and wellbeing while also holding, uh, a lot of burdens for everyone else?
Jen Golynsky: Well, I'll be honest, I don't always manage it a hundred percent right. And when that happens, I [00:16:15] schedule a day off.
Uh, I am very scheduled, if you will.
I go to bed pretty early. I'm in bed by nine 30 because I'm up by five 30 and I like to exercise before work, and that's my release. So [00:16:30] whatever I know is coming my way that that day.
I've already broken a good sweat or had a power yoga class or gone for a run with friends, something so that I've burned off some of that nervous energy.
Um, the other thing I will tell you, and [00:16:45] it sounds the probably gonna get a lot of gasps when I say this right, is that I don't do caffeine.
Because on the rare occasion that I do, it really winds me up and I find that I'm not as calm and I'm a little more [00:17:00] reactive.
And my team will tell you, then I can't stop talking. I'm like, and, and they're like, whoa. And it only happens a couple times a year, but you know, when it does, it's very noticeable. And then the other thing too is that there are a lot of [00:17:15] resources that you can take advantage of. You have to schedule time for yourself.
Julia: Yeah.
Jen Golynsky: I don't take meetings before eight o'clock. Whereas there's some people that get in the office at six 30, but I want that time to exercise, shower, have [00:17:30] breakfast, and be ready for my workday. Um, we have done a lot at work with mindfulness.
Julia: Hmm.
Jen Golynsky: There's a company called the Institute for Organizational Mindfulness and they've done a series of webinars for us.
[00:17:45] Um, I personally have the happier app.
And that's Dan Harris's app. And I, even if it's just five minutes, I meditate every night before bed. People think it's, you know, oh, I don't wanna meditate. But you know, it, it's like somebody's talking to [00:18:00] you and even it's just for five minutes. It kind of calms you down.
It's a nice way to, um, you know, to end the day. And then the other thing I will say is that even. If you think you're too busy, [00:18:15] making time for friends and socializing outside of work is very, very helpful. Um, I have walk dates with a couple friends every week and I would rather do that than go out to eat right and [00:18:30] spend more money.
And, and so we get to catch up and I get my steps in, and then I, I walk away from that feeling refreshed. So even if it's a stressful conversation, even if my friend is going through something challenging, as we're walking and talking, [00:18:45] we both get that release. Mm-hmm.
Julia: Yeah, absolutely. So really what I hear you saying is that you've identified what's most important to you and you've, and you've identified and learned, what does your body need, [00:19:00] even physically, emotionally, relationally, and those are priority. And those get scheduled and then the rest fills in.
Jen Golynsky: Yeah, absolutely. The other thing I will say, so we are hybrid,[00:19:15]
um, in the office three days a week, and home two days a week, and the days that I'm in the office, I just have to accept that people are gonna be popping in and I'm outta office. In and out of my office all day long. And it's okay. [00:19:30] It's okay that I scheduled from, you know, nine to 10 to do this certain project and somebody walked in at nine 30 and I got derailed.
It is okay. It is not the end of the world. The sky is not falling, [00:19:45] and I will finish it when the person leaves.
Julia: So really those days of being in the office are, you're, you're managing your expectations and already setting yourself up for, I'm [00:20:00] going to need to be flexible. And so there's some, again, awareness, bringing to attention what you're going to need for others. In that space and it just sets you up [00:20:15] for success, probably more often than not.
Jen Golynsky: You know, I really like to think so. One thing I will mention though, HR Professionals as a group. Are sometimes held to a different [00:20:30] standard. So what comes out of your mouth is viewed differently. And uh, a very smart coworker once said to me, you know, when you crack a joke or you think you're funny or you're doing this, he said, people are still seeing you as Jen, the HR lady, not [00:20:45] Jen, my, my coworker or my friend. Sometimes it doesn't land 'cause that's not what they're expecting from the HR person.
Julia: Yeah, I think you are so right. And more often than not, people are looking at HR [00:21:00] professionals as compliance you're just showing up as a person, and sometimes that creates a disconnect that that really challenges. Even your ability to connect relationally [00:21:15] with people.
You mentioned that you guys are hybrid three days in two days, home at home or wherever, remote and. One of the big topics out there. In fact, I have several clients who [00:21:30] are also trying to navigate this shift and, and have been since COVID. And the real challenge is still, which is better, and how do you create a connected culture in a [00:21:45] remote or hybrid environment?
So what have you learned about that process? What, what has worked and what hasn't worked the way that you thought it might?
Jen Golynsky: So this has been an evolution. Right? Before COVID, we were writing [00:22:00] a hybrid policy, not knowing that we would all be going home for two years. Um, and we had already, so we had already thought about this.
Um, and so when we came back from COVID, we were in the [00:22:15] office 50% of the time.
And so it was two days, one week, three days, the opposite week.
What we decided was that common days were very helpful, and so the entire company came in on Tuesdays. If you wanted your [00:22:30] team's common day the same day, great. If you wanted a different day because everybody was in at least two days a week, then do that. So departments decided for themselves, and then what naturally happened [00:22:45] was that if there were departments that worked very closely together. They would collaborate on that and say, well, what's your common day? You know, let me switch my common day because we, we need each other
Julia: that. Yeah.
Jen Golynsky: and, and I will tell you, when you [00:23:00] make the most of your time in the office, that's what counts. How do you bring people together? So we made sure that our all staff meetings, which are um, bimonthly. We're on that common day giving people, [00:23:15] you know, yet another reason to come in.
And we started to notice project work so that in-person collaboration where you can, was so much more productive for us. Other thing. And now [00:23:30] I'm gonna be honest, right? Not everybody wanted to come back to the office, and we did have some people leave and, and find fully remote jobs.
What we do now is if you want an assigned office, something permanent, you know, hang up your pictures or you want, [00:23:45] then you have to commit to being the office three days a week.
If you are okay with a hoteling space, and we have an app that you book a ho, you know, a, a office that's not permanently assigned, then you can be in the office two days a week.
It's been really interesting since we started [00:24:00] that this year to watch people shift their days and collaborate and who they wanna sit by. And we have a lot of common spaces where you can, you know, huddle up and have a meeting both formal and informal. [00:24:15] And it's great to see those spaces utilized.
Julia: That, yeah. So are you seeing that people are. Wanting to be in the office more or is it just when they are, they've, [00:24:30] they've arranged it so that they're with the people that they want to be, and they're utilizing that time more efficiently.
Jen Golynsky: Actually, it's.
So we had some people start out saying that they wanted a hotel, and [00:24:45] then they came to us and said, no, actually I wanna come in three days a week. I want a permanent office.
So, so that's happened. And then yes, of course the, the collaboration and the different days. And we have, um, we're very, very fortunate that we have a lot of [00:25:00] restaurants within walking distance.
We have a marketplace on the first floor of our building. So that has really helped people will run downstairs, bring something back, and sit in our common room, our common [00:25:15] area, and chat over lunch. And that's something that we didn't really used to do in the old building
as much.
Julia: Yeah.
Jen Golynsky: and I've just seen a lot more traffic in that area and it's nice.
Julia: [00:25:30] Yeah. So I'm curious how that has impacted just the culture of the workplace. How, how have you seen shifts?
Jen Golynsky: So if I could brag for a minute, we just finished [00:25:45] our annual employee engagement survey and we did very well, and our net promoter score and our positivity was just wonderful. Um. Not only that, but we [00:26:00] had out of 43 repeat questions from the last time we did this survey, 42 showed improvement.
Julia: Wow.
Jen Golynsky: So that was pretty amazing.
Um, we shared the results with the, with all staff last [00:26:15] time and we said, here's what we're seeing, here's what we're hearing, here's what we are gonna work on going forward. And then we came back to staff and said, okay. This is what we've been doing. Are you seeing the results? Is we headed in the right direction?
Let's [00:26:30] continue down that path. And people were able to make the, the, those connections and really feel the impact. And one of the things I'm most proud of is that people really feel like they know how [00:26:45] their role connects to our mission. And when people are connected to the mission, they're much more likely.
To collaborate and to give that little extra to get something over the finish line.
Julia: Absolutely. So I'm [00:27:00] curious how you were able to move, move the gauge on that particular issue of just helping people to, to get connected to the overall mission.
Jen Golynsky: A couple of things. One is we looked at the, what we were posting for our [00:27:15] jobs.
Our openings and then making sure that in the phone screening that people understood how that particular role that they were interviewing for fit into our overall mission. I think the biggest thing that has helped is that we have three key strategic focus [00:27:30] areas and every time our CEO gives an update in our staff meeting and also to our board of directors, he focuses on those so that everybody sees how what we're doing.
Is [00:27:45] connected. And one of the three, um, pillars is to be a highly desirable place to work.
Julia: Hmm.
Jen Golynsky: affects every employee and we welcome feedback. We can't do everything right that people
[00:28:00] want. Um, however, we have really made an effort to hold those conversations and to ask people what they're feeling, do they understand how it fits into the big picture?
And again, safe [00:28:15] place to fail. Safe place to ask questions. Our industry has a lot of acronyms
Julia: Yes, you do.
Jen Golynsky: and, and we give everybody a glossary, but you know, I don't sleep with it under my pillow and, and, and men memorize it. [00:28:30] Um, so it's okay in a meeting to raise your hand and say, Hey, what does that mean again?
Julia: What is that?
Jen Golynsky: And how does that affect me? And how can I help with that?
Julia: Hmm. You know, it kind of circles back to what you said, [00:28:45] like you're not going to know just because you're hr, you may not know everything and you're not gonna know all the policies. You, you may not remember all the acronyms and that's okay. And we really, if you don't know, not [00:29:00] knowing is not the problem.
It's not asking. So cultivating kind of this culture of. Ask the question we want you to know and no harm in not knowing.
Jen Golynsky: Great. And you know, back to, [00:29:15] um, having those crucial conversations and not letting brush fires become forest fires. If there's somebody that presents regularly, we owe it to them to give them that feedback to say, Hey, if you are losing us as an audience, you're surely gonna lose the broader audience. So.[00:29:30]
Could we help you incorporate some, some better definitions or some, less use of acronyms so
that people can make that connection while you're speaking?
Julia: Right. I love that. Just the other day before I went to a meeting, [00:29:45] I had gotten kind of an overview and I stuck it in chat, GPT, and said, can you explain this so that a fifth grader could understand it?
Jen Golynsky: Um.
Julia: Because I, it was in a language I did not understand what [00:30:00] most of it was. Um, and, but I'm wondering if, you know, really, that's it?
It wasn't. Terrible that I didn't know. I've just never been in a situation where I've needed to know that and I needed to [00:30:15] ask. And, and so in some ways I see you being able to offer that, uh, to people,
Jen Golynsky: well, you know what? The other thing is to surround yourself with great people,
Julia: Hmm.
Jen Golynsky: and I have a fabulous team and [00:30:30] fabulous peers, and everybody is naturally curious and that really helps.
Julia: So that's kind of a buzzword that's out there right now. Be curious. Thank you Ted Lasso. Right. And be [00:30:45] curious. Be curious. And yet. What I have found is that curiosity isn't necessarily a decision that we make. It actually comes from the deeper work of cultivating a [00:31:00] capacity to be around people who might be different than you or have different ideas and the reason I say that is because in the heat of a moment.
If you're in a defensive posture, [00:31:15] your, your subconscious brain is going to be reacting with a fight or flight response because it doesn't feel safe. And yet, uh, when you do the deeper work of putting [00:31:30] yourself in situations that are safe and almost practicing having different opinions. Being curious, it can really change the script from the inside out. [00:31:45] So really the follow up to that is how have you been able to cultivate those safe spaces for differing opinions so that people do have a safe experience of kind of [00:32:00] contradictory perspectives,
Jen Golynsky: Well, it's a work in progress, right? No one conversation is perfect. Working with, one of my peers, we've created a leader coach program that we're putting all of our [00:32:15] management team through, and so it's about having those coaching conversations.
Being a coach leader has a definition that a lot of people think, well, I have to lead, I have to always be in charge. Coaching to [00:32:30] me is more supportive and more collaborative. One of the things we talk about is to let the team member own the agenda. So if I have a one-on-one with somebody after I have an introductory, so how are you, how was your weekend? How's the [00:32:45] family? Right? Get them talking about something that's a little easier you know, gets them into the flow of the conversation then.
So tell me what's on your mind.
What have you got going on this week? Are there any challenges and [00:33:00] keep asking those questions. And I was, you know, back to the curiosity, it's a muscle that you can exercise just like asking these coaching questions. So if somebody were to come to me and say, oh, and I've gotta get [00:33:15] this project and I've gotta get six other people and you know, this is just gonna be a bear. One of the questions could be, so what would success look like for you by the end of the week? Do you get four people on board? Do you want all six people on board? Is [00:33:30] it enough that you have an outline that you all agree on?
Or, you know, are you looking for something else? And by asking those questions and getting the person to answer.
Even if they say, you know what? I need to think about that. [00:33:45] Let me, let me get back to you.
And that's always fine too.
Julia: Yeah. The thing that I love about coaching, uh, relationships are that. There's, the coach is always in the [00:34:00] position of like side by side position. As soon as we start getting in front and pulling people, it just doesn't work. They're gonna fall down. But if we're side by side and we're kind of helping, uh, the [00:34:15] coachee to.
To understand what they want to help them to clarify. And there's something really powerful. And again, the, the neuroscience is telling us how much are, and so I'm gonna [00:34:30] hold up my brain model 'cause I always do this. Uh, for those of you who are just listening, just imagine my cross
section. Yeah, and our brains work from the bottom up.
And so our brains are asking, am I safe [00:34:45] first? And that's kind of the brainstem, like physically safe. And then the limbic system in the middle. It looks kinda like a gas tank in a cross section of your brain. And I always say that this has to be filled up. So [00:35:00] that your thinking brain can operate at maximum capacity?
Well, people are usually surprised to find out that what fills up this tank with positive energy is relational connection. [00:35:15] People. Uh, and, and this can even happen digitally when, like you and I right now, we are not in the same room and yet we're still able to have a relational experience, um, where we [00:35:30] see each other and we're hearing each other, and this has the capacity to fill up this middle part of your brain, which is not asking is this life or death, but it is asking, do I belong? [00:35:45] Am I accepted? You mentioned Brene Brown earlier, and she, this is what she's talking about, that it is a core need, and the beauty is that when that question is answered in the [00:36:00] affirmative, in the moment.
Yes, I think I do belong here, or I am accepted. Then all of a sudden it spurs your thinking brain. To do decisions [00:36:15] and critical thinking and creativity in ways that your thinking brain didn't have access to that energy before. And so a coaching relationship or any, any, any relationship where [00:36:30] you can be helping to fill up one another's gas tank in your brain is going to yield exponential results.
Jen Golynsky: Absolutely. And one of the things I think a lot of people missed when [00:36:45] we were remote,
Is just walking the halls and saying hello to people
And just that visibility. Um, our executives do a very good job of that,
of walking around the floor and, you know, even if it just takes five minutes a day walking around [00:37:00] the floor, see and be seen.
And say hello to people. And, and that makes a huge difference as well.
Julia: It does, and I tell people it's more than just a transactional thing, that it's the [00:37:15] right thing to do. Bodies, our physical bodies need. To be seen. And there's a, a chemical reaction that happens in us that gives us energy when [00:37:30] we're able to connect with others. And it doesn't take much more than a smile or eye contact or anything like that, just a positive exchange. Oh, well Jennifer, we are, [00:37:45] uh. Getting close to our time limit. And so as we get ready to close, I would just, you know, you have so much wisdom to offer, especially people who are just entering in to [00:38:00] this world. And so what, what advice do you wish that you had known or that you would like to give to those who are entering into the HR world and.
Um, what do you wish you had [00:38:15] known when you were stepping into that space?
Jen Golynsky: Wow. Wow. Those are, those are some diverse questions. I think what I. Really want people to know. And what I tell people all the time is, number one, be kind to [00:38:30] yourself and be patient.
Julia: Hmm.
Jen Golynsky: And number two, find your village.
And it can be through, you know, professional organization like SHRM. It can be people from a graduate school class or undergraduate school class.
It can be a walking [00:38:45] club in your neighborhood. Whatever it is, find your village, find your people, and know that you have that support. Something that I wish that I would've known, and I talked a little bit about this earlier, right, is to not take [00:39:00] it personally when somebody doesn't take your advice, even though you think you know the situation or you know better, sometimes people have something else in mind, and so no matter what your answer is, it wasn't what they were looking for and they're not [00:39:15] gonna go with it.
And it's okay. It really is okay. You know, it's not your job to convince people and you know, to hit them over the head until they come around to your way of thinking.
It, it's, it's better to have the [00:39:30] discussion and build the relationship. And that way when you need something from someone else and you come to them, they say, how can I help you? Not what do you want from me?
Julia: Hmm. Wow. That could be a whole nother [00:39:45] conversation, I think, because how many times again, do we need affirmation from someone and, but we don't realize it. And so in a situation where we offer something needing [00:40:00] affirmation and we don't get it, they don't take our idea. It triggers our own insecurities and it, and especially early in a career, right, when we're trying to prove our value [00:40:15] and, and I think that circles back to the importance of what you just said with find your village, find your people can help you grow.
Who can give you affirmation. Relationally [00:40:30] so that you don't need it as much professionally. It, it gives, it provides a lot of freedom to offer what you have to offer and then let people take it or leave it.
Jen Golynsky: Very true.
Julia: So, [00:40:45] well, thank you so much for taking time to join us here, uh, on Wired to Lead, and I just, I'm so grateful and just have really enjoyed the conversation.
Jen Golynsky: Well, thank you. I've enjoyed speaking with you too, [00:41:00] and I really appreciate the opportunity.
Julia: All right everyone. We'll see you next time.