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Join James Petrossi in 'Leave the Feed: 30 Days of Disconnect' as he interviews creators and mental health advocates about their journeys, the digital quagmire, and tips to create a healthier relationship with social media.
[00:00:00]
James Petrossi: Hello and welcome to Leave the Feed 30 Days of Disconnect. Today is day two Are
Manasi Patil: you in?
James Petrossi: And sitting in with me today to discuss our Are you in? is the chief advisor of Leave the Feed, who is really at the epicenter at the construction of this project. Helps so much in developing the book is Manasi Patil, awesome to see you today.
Manasi Patil: Thank you so much for inviting. It's been very fun working on this project. So, you know, just taking this new segment for the podcast. I'm really excited to see how this goes. I'm looking forward to conversation as well.
James Petrossi: You and I have known each other for almost five years. Mentee of mine, and I'm also a mentee of yours, this cross generational [00:01:00] sharing of knowledge. so it's great to reconnect, but a lot of the audience doesn't know anything about you. So let's talk about your journey as a creator, as a child, and how it's transformed and where you are today and what you're passionate about.
Manasi Patil: Right. So you know, it was never about like being a creator. I, I never like planned to do so, but writing, speaking about stuff that I'm passionate about. That has always been like a part of me. But lockdown, like lockdown has been a very important phase in my life, I would say because there I was in the lockdown, like no school, nothing much to do, and I was like writing something and.
Whatever I was writing turned out to be like a whole book long. So I went to my father and I was like, this is something that I wrote. And so he said, you know, why don't you try to publish it? But it was very funny because I never thought about it and we didn't know, like given the ABC about publishing.
So I went on the internet and I got about self-publishing. [00:02:00] So it, it was very exciting. It was also very intimidating because writing a book, publishing a book, and I used to buy those books from Amazon and to know that my book, something that I wrote could actually be there. It was interesting.
But yeah, so I, I. Learned about everything. I did my formatting. I the cover and stuff, editing and stuff. I did it sitting like in a corner of my house. And then when, like when I actually published it through Amazon, it was very exciting to see my book on the Amazon page that like, that was.
A very important moment for me. I would say so, and that like really opened the doors for me, opened the entire world to me, I would say because I felt like if I've done this, then why can't I do more? This is something that I never imagined, so why not more? So that led me into you know, cold emailing people for the book that I wrote. I wanted people to read it and like let me know what's, what's good, what's bad. I started cold emailing people and the emails were way [00:03:00] too funny, and I used to email it from like my mother's email. So sometimes I go back and like, the, the emails are so funny, but, some people did. Some people were so kind, they actually replied and everything. And then they really helped me go through it. So. Yeah, that kind of, it was like a very trial and error process. So yeah, after I wrote my books, I I got on LinkedIn and LinkedIn has been a very integral part as well.
So as a creator, I started writing I wrote for like magazines. And speaking has also been an important part. I spoke at events, I conducted workshops for students. So it's, I realized that like, you know, being a creator, it's not just about putting out content, but also like putting out yourself because, and it gave me a lot of confidence because there you are like.
You are just sitting in front of your screen and there's like the whole there's like a whole world in like be beyond the screen and you don't know what's, you know, what's going to happen. [00:04:00] So it's also interesting, also intimidating, but like the possibility of doing something, of achieving something.
So yeah, that's, I think that's like, an important part of being a creator. And I do want to explore it more as I go through college and everything. So, and my journey, I would say it's been like very messy, experimental. I've done a lot of mistakes and when I speak to students, like I, when I do workshops in schools, I also make it a point to like tell them about the mistakes that I've done.
So, so that, you know, they can improvise on, on those points and stuff. So, yeah, I, I love the journey.
James Petrossi: You brought up you know, it can feel messy, right? And I think. That's life. Right? It's for all of us. We're all figuring it out and things are unfolding. And when you wrote your first book, you were how old?
Manasi Patil: I was 14.
James Petrossi: Yeah. You're 14 years old figuring out all of this. And then that was a story. That was a, a crime story, right?
The first book that you
Manasi Patil: That is [00:05:00] a mystery.
James Petrossi: And then as you got. Older. You talked about speaking in front of students. A lot of your work was about like mentoring younger students, but also Z, empowerment, and what was it about empowerment itself? What did you wanna bring to, you know, your community? What did you want to bring to students?
What did you want to bring to your peers? What was it inside of you? 'cause you had a lot inside of you that was burning to speak, to help, you know? So what was the root of that?
Manasi Patil: I think it was like it was like a kid inside me at the very base of it all because you know, when you're the little child and you like, do something and it turns out to be great and you want to tell all of your friends about it too. You want them to know how to do this and all of that.
So I guess like at the base of it, it was that and as I, you know, gain more knowledge about like. For example, for that sphere, I wanted people, I wanted students my age to know about this because when I was in, [00:06:00] on LinkedIn it was, it was like, as I said, you know, a very different world. There were people, there were students very much younger than me doing awesome things, things that I had never even thought that, you know.
People in my age could do. So, and that was, that was like a very interesting thing. So I wanted to tell everyone from my school, everyone who didn't know about that, he, Hey, this is what you can do, this is what we can do. So I think that's where the empowerment came from. And it was very personal because, when I when I saw PE students doing this, even I wanted to do something, maybe if it, even if they are, it was like from a different venture than from what I was doing. I wanted to do more, you know, push beyond. So I felt that, you know, seeing people do things, you get inspired and everyth, it's like, it's like a chain kind of thing.
Where you get inspired by seeing someone else. I guess that's where they're talking from. The empowerment thing. I want, I want to you know, help teenagers create a space where they can [00:07:00] empower themselves. They can do things about whatever that they are passionate about, not like be underconfident about it.
James Petrossi: I think that was one of the most exciting things to me about Gen Z, and one of the reasons I wanted to work on Leave the Feed with your generation was because was seeing what. Young kids were doing, you know, during the pandemic and lockdown, and I was thinking, wow, so much opportunity. You know, growing up could mow lawns, be a babysitter, you know, like earn extra money, doing little chores and stuff.
And now people had these outlets to really express themselves to create and do all of these wonderful things. But obviously social media has, you know, pros and cons and Leave the Feed exists for a reason because. We need to find balance. What's your journey been like? 'cause I know you and I met on LinkedIn and I know that's an important platform for you, but when you look at the ecosystem [00:08:00] of social media and how has it helped you and where has it really challenged you in your core as a person?
Manasi Patil: I, you know, from whatever I've experienced so far, I think social media, I feel like it can be either a platform where you can, you know, elevate yourself or it's, it's also like a paradox because if you get caught in like the whirlwind of, the, the messy part of it, then it's, it's very hard to get out of it.
Like it, so it can be like a platform where you can put out your voice. For me it has been like that. So social media, it has been like a platform for, for me to grow.
But I think for a lot of people, for those who are starting new they do fear this, you know. Okay. Am I doing this right? And like they, because they have like someone, they're looking up to someone who has reached a certain height, so they compare themselves with them. They, they are not doing the things like this.
So should I do it or not? Will will people laugh at what I'm doing and stuff. [00:09:00] So that's like the negative angle of it. But, there's the constant cycle of, you know, am I doing enough? Am I posting enough? Am I growing enough? And it can get toxic. If you don't pause. But personally for me, I met a lot of people.
I met I met you, and then we started working on Leave the Feed. I, so I guess you need to learn. Sometimes like, you know, where to draw boundaries as well. LinkedIn is a, is a good platform, but they like especially teenagers use other social media platforms as well. And those platforms, usage is quite more than LinkedIn.
So those platforms are more toxic. And students get really caught up. In that. In my 12th it was 12th grade for example, I wasn't on social media a lot, like on LinkedIn. I was non-existent basically. So it's okay to, if you like, take some pause for whatever like is going on in your life if you, even if you like, you want to be a [00:10:00] creator.
It's about drawing boundaries. Not making your feed your entire personality, and especially if you are a creator, then not letting, not letting the numbers define the impact that you're having. Because even if you have an impact on one person, it still counts, right?
James Petrossi: Yeah, very important that. Impact and where we make that impact. And you brought up at the beginning of this discussion, you, you're a creator. We're all creators, we're all bringing things into this world. But when you look at social media any platform and you see someone with 10, 20, 30, 40,000, million followers, and you're young and you aspire to be like that. They're on a different path, a different trajectory. Who knows how they got there, but what's right for you? What's right for me? What's right for anyone? I mean, that's something we all have to answer for ourselves is the why. Why am I doing this? [00:11:00] You know? And, and to understand also when to hit that pause button that you're talking about that can be challenging.
And when do you decide when to hit the pause button? Like, how do you know? Excuse.
Manasi Patil: I guess you'll know it like by instinct, like on days that you feel you are are feeling too frustrated like, I guess I think you should take a pause even if it's like for one day. Because. I learned growing up and like learning my, my parents also constantly tell me telling me about this, your health should be your first priority, mental health, physical health.
So even if you feel even a little bit frustrated, I think you should take a break. And then depending upon that whether you want to take like a day's break, a month's break, or like like maybe a three months break to reconnect with yourself. So, yeah, I think it's just you'll, you'll just know when to do that and you should trust your gut on that.
James Petrossi: Right, because if you continue to push yourself in a state of stress and anxiety. [00:12:00] And try to measure up against something that isn't right for you. can never reach that. You know that mountain might not be yours to climb, and if it's not, you can never find your footing. You can never get to that next level, and that next level is different for all of us.
And I love what you said about, you know, the impact that you make is by. Those real connections, you know, it's that one person that you really touch that has a butterfly effect across that ripples. You know, that's what's, that's what's really exciting. I.
Manasi Patil: True. And if you are, like, if you're pushing yourself more than what your community is, you, it, it'll just lead you to burnout. And then you'll take like, like this has happened with me sometimes everything that I want to do, I try to do it in like one day, one, or I put like an all night and then I have to sleep the entire next day.
So then that just, that's of no use basically. So yeah, you should like have a healthy schedule. Something that I still [00:13:00] as a, have to integrate in my life, but
James Petrossi: So good segue into talking about commitment. Today is day two of Leave the Feed where we really ask. Readers, our participants, those that are part of the Leave the Feed challenge to make a commitment and to sign an agreement that they're gonna go through these 30 days. And commitment's really challenging.
A lot of us just like to do things very short term like you even said, like, I can get this done quickly, or How can I just move past this? Right. And we're asking something. Very unique. We're asking people to go on a journey, but it's not a journey to lock your phone away. It's not a journey to really, you know, throw shade at social media.
You can be on this journey and use social media if you really have to. is the Leave the Feed commitment to you, [00:14:00] and how do you integrate commitments into your life and how have they made you better?
Manasi Patil: Commitment. I, I knew about it, but I guess college has taught me a lot more about commitment and now it's, it's not just about, you know, showing up every day. It's like, it's about like, showing up even when no one is watching you. , I'd like to use like what I am facing on a daily basis now.
So I'm, I'm studying computer science, right, and to become like a good programmer. It's not like you can. You can like study for one month and then you'll know everything about it. You have to like practice like coding every day so that you can, you know that it's like the little errors. If there's like even one semicolon missing in the code, the code won't run and you have to like set for five hours in front of the computer and try to decode it.
So it's, and when you do it, like every day when you try to solve like one problem every day, you it's like you get like the instinct you get. You, you just understand where the problem might be. So you know, commitment [00:15:00] in that sense can be just showing up. Like even when, when you don't really want to when things are getting boring and stuff.
So yeah, commitment has been like a big part of my life right now and, one example, one more example I'd like to use is for like my assignment submissions and stuff if it, I, if I don't do it like every day, then at the end of like, at the end of the submission period, there are like 10 submissions have to do it once.
So then it's all about quickly, quickly writing and then, which in turn leads me to burnout. So it's a very bad cycle to continue. So, yeah, I guess commitment . You should practice it like daily. And it's also a form, like it, it teaches you self trusts as well. I think because every time you, like, you keep a promise to yourself.
You like grow a little i'll, if you say, I'll do this tomorrow, and you actually do it, it, it increases like your trust in yourself and that's the, that must be like a beautiful learning. I'm trying to. Put it in my life. [00:16:00] So you, you start believing that if you, if you have done it once, if you, if you did it yesterday, you can do it today as well.
When you like, put it in your life it does have a big impact.
James Petrossi: It does have a big impact, but you're right. It is challenging to stick with a commitment, right? To show up day when it's hard to. Bring your consciousness to something that you know is important, that's gonna make you better a myriad of distractions around you. And know, you showed a commitment as a 15 or 14-year-old writing a book, formatting a book, publishing a book, then doing speaking, a lot of commitment inside of there.
And you said it's a messy journey. Now Leave the Feed. You know, we ask for a commitment, and the commitment isn't. Lock your phone away and see what happens. We're asking people to go on a journey reconnect. And is [00:17:00] it about that reconnection journey that feel is essential for not just your generation but all humans?
Manasi Patil: As a student, like I see you know, my friends sometimes we are so into what social media has to offer because especially with Instagram, like you have those stories, right? From, from people. So you want to like, see what's going on in their life, you're so interested in that.
Every time you open the app, even like initially, Instagram wasn't supposed to like show your feed what you post and everything, but it's like shifting towards seeing what other people are doing in their life. So, suppose if the wifi goes off for even like one day for even for one hour, you immediately start like fidgeting and stuff, and then you go and see, you go and see what your family members are doing.
You go into the rooms where, like with your mobile, you're just sitting in like one corner. You're just sitting on your bed being a potato couch, but then the wifi goes and you have nothing to do on your phone. And then you go and [00:18:00] you know, talk with your parents and stuff. You talk with your brother and it see.
Is so wholesome. It feels like, it feels like as if you're into a, you know, a total different experience. But, and that is sad actually, because it's, it's sad because like, it's, it's always there. It's always existing, but you don't have the time to, you know, look up from your phone and actually reconnect with whatever it's, it's in your surrounding.
But like in, in my house, my father loves plants and saplings and stuff, so he has a lot of them. So sometimes. Like taking a break from social media for me, when my parents are not around, I go and you know, visit the balcony and stuff and like observe the plants. My father is very enthusiastic about it, so like he observes every, like, tiny leaf as well.
Like he pays attention over the leaf has turn yellow so it needs more sunlight, and then he'll bring it near a window and stuff. So I try to, you know. Put that in my life as well. I try to observe the plants and stuff. So you know, [00:19:00] with Leave the Feed book that is what we want people to do, right?
Is reconnect more with your, like the people around you, the surroundings around you and yeah, like that. That's very beautiful. So I guess more, more teenagers and people gen Z especially should have that in their life.
James Petrossi: I think it's beautiful what you said too, that those moments, right, that somehow pass us by every day because we're fixated on our phones, right? We're fixated on little ecosystem that contains the whole world in the palm of our hand. Right? And then all of a sudden, yeah, like a moment comes where we don't have that. Connection and all of a sudden we have to sort of snap into reality and you're like, whoa, like this feels good. This is beautiful. I haven't acknowledged this. Like, and then, oh wait, the [00:20:00] WiFi's back on. You know, now me go back into my device and just become fixated again. And I think that's what's about this experience of Leave the Feed is because. There's a lot of different ways in this guide to help foster those connections that you might not even know Like the things around you that are so special. Like it's not just about staring at a plant, it's about pondering creation. You know, there's so much depth and meaning to all of these experiences that we have, but when we don't have our eyes open to them. And we're not observing them, like you said, like we have to step back and almost res observe the reality that we're in as it is, you know, it's really cool.
Manasi Patil: And, and the funny thing is like after after the wifi comes on and then you again go on like social media and you again post about it the wifi was not on. So I went, I had like, reconnected with my family and it [00:21:00] was so wholesome. And then again, you go back in the cycle, see, to see how many people have replied, how many people have seen my the post I wanted to do.
So. Yeah. With this challenge people can actually step back and reconnect mode and not just for the sake of it..
James Petrossi: So what's your hope for. Those that are taking this challenge, what's your encouragement? What wisdom do you have? Whether they're going through all 30 days or they're just looking for some like inspiration to help manage their social media use what do you want them to get out of this experience?
Manasi Patil: I think the fact that they started the challenge is like a big thing in itself. So like you said, yes to growth, you said yes to improving yourself, and that's, that's a pretty big deal. You know, you just. You didn't wait for like the right time, but you started it.
We started now and that's, that's very important. So one of the things I'd like to [00:22:00] hope that people do is it they shouldn't hopefully like for being perfect. Because. If, if you're like starting the challenge, there are times you won't be able to complete like the entire Challenge. There'll be like, so maybe you'll miss like a day, maybe you miss two days, and that's okay.
You just have to be honest to yourself about to see what the end goal is. Because we, we don't want people to, you know, log out, like not use social media, but it, because it's about reconnecting. It's okay if you miss some days you, you shouldn't feel guilty about it because you have to be honest to yourself.
But you do have to keep showing up. Because, you know, growth, like growth isn't like always the, the linear stuff, it's like up and down. So with the challenge as well, it, it'll be about, it'll be like that. At the end of the day, you'll be closer to yourself. You'll be closer to the people around you, and that would be the most important thing.
So even if it's like not your online version if, even if you're not like productive online, you [00:23:00] are getting closer to yourself.
James Petrossi: Do you have any other inspiring words or parting words of wisdom for your generation to empower them to live productive, healthy, positive lives?
Manasi Patil: It's very important that . You are being honest to yourself because at this age, it's very, very common to, you know get like, get into peer pressure and everything. And social media has a very, very large part of it.
You see people, your age doing stuff, and then. You don't want to feel left out, but it's very important that you stay honest to the principles that you have. For example, in like in college that a lot of people with a lot of different thought processes, and not that they are wrong, but , it's just that way that they see life, so the way that you see life, it's very important that you stick to it, you stick to those principle.
.
James Petrossi: I love that of staying true to your values, staying true to you, and making sure that you're on a journey that. Is right for you and you're not trying to be on someone else's journey. It's one [00:24:00] thing I've always admired of you, and it's a reason that I've enjoyed working with you so much on this, this project.
Manasi Patil: I have one more actually, like because. It's also about reconnecting with the people around you, right? So it's very important that you have like a support group , to have like friends and family members so that you can, whenever you you can just go and talk to them if something is not feeling right.
Having those friends, it's. Very important for like your mental health. And you'll realize that it's so much fun to hang out and like in person then, you know, to get on social media and like keep chatting through the night or something like that. So when you, get together and do activities, celebrate birthdays and stuff. It's very wholesome and it gives you much more dopamine than you know, doom scrolling or something.
James Petrossi: Right, right. It's like a, a long-term sustainable feeling of euphoric connection as opposed to, you know, quick hits of jolting you. Well, thank you so much. You've been an awesome guest. Thank you so much for being part [00:25:00] of this project. I really appreciate you. For those listening, be sure to share, Leave the Feed with a friend, give us a rating, a review, subscribe to this channel and Manasi. Thank you so much. It was wonderful talking to you today.
Manasi Patil: Thank you so much for inviting me.