Subscribe
Share
Share
Embed
Oren insists the dragon burns. Tannhauser shuts down mid-sentence. Baldrick finally says out loud that Vali's rot has turned to black lesions. A Zeskorin reality engine hands Rahua a vision of another caravan dying. Then Oren turns into a dinosaur, rust chickens come screaming out of the brush, and the mantra that carries the season is born.
Website: https://www.narrativedeclaration.com
System: Pathfinder Second Edition
Creators and Guests
Host
Host
Guest
Guest
Guest
What is Rotgrind - Narrative Declaration?
Five adventurers try to survive in this comedy filled Pathfinder Second Edition TTRPG campaign within the grim dark world of Tyne. Follow the show, get custom TTRPG content, and more at https://narrativedeclaration.com
all righty chat are you excited for another exciting episode of road grind
i was i was i was trying to do uh sweet dreams are made of this in parentheses
exciting episode of rock grind i am joe i'm gonna do intros real fast and get ready
lightning fast intros bam joined by odoroshi rider hi hello uh i'm odo i'm playing volley
swashbuckler i'm blue and i'm in your walls next actually not next yet because i want to ask you
a quick question real fast one we have leveled up to level seven we're all level seven now
what did volley pick as her general feat i picked fucking diehard i picked diehard you piece of
i wonder why i had to pick diehard oh yeah because you're now rotten three now aren't you
it means you're permanently wounded three until we get a plot
that or you just die you have your backup character right that or i just explode yeah
that's right chat that's right she's a coward all right take it cat predict if volley will die in
this episode he was a she she's a coward he says he was in my dms two days ago hey odo have you
considered taking diehard i think a fucking used car salesman like slapping volley's head this bitch
can fit so many levels rotten like to slap her bald head look valley i got a guaranteed weight of
if you take this diehard beat at this apy of of 11.7 you know oh yeah you'll be good
all right all right well of course next up we have the ever thick hulky crow hello yes that is
me i am hulky crow i am playing the kenrasu cleric rohua and i'm in your cheeks uh any any
special things you picked up when you leveled i did i picked up toughness oh oh wow he is thick
you are thicker now yeah it just means my health gets bigger my uh my cheeks get bigger and i
my flat saving trek for dying i think is 10 or 9 plus my or dying something something like that
i'm hard to kill and next up we have our ever feel ever feel me do the alchemical fumes erindel
i'm erindel i'm playing as baldrick he's an alchemist he's gonna blow shit up and my general
feat that i picked up is quiet allies because i figure the best way in order for one of our well
thought out plans to actually work is to go through is to not let you guys roll using your
skills hey it basically is quiet allies means i am skilled at moving with a group when you are
avoiding notice and your allies follow the expert you and those allies can roll a single stealth check
using the lowest modifier instead of all rolling separately oh man that's pretty good follow the
leader though that sounds hard yeah do we even have a party leader currently we don't we don't have a
party expert we don't have no picture and squelch it's gonna step up yeah and squelch it's gonna
end up in the gear the grinder so it is it is either me or tanhauser so honestly like i don't i don't
know if that's a good thing or not and uh and and tanhauser is missing today or speaker spends a day
he has guests over so here would not be joining us today uh but i am your host soren the bear um i'm
playing the strict druid oran who recently just had his you know plot point die and for my stuff i
picked up for my general feat fleet and uh and finally got to have the you know i've been waiting
for a while because uh oran needs to get a bow because he's been having archer dedication for a
bit and um he needs a bow because i actually used my last action to shoot things yeah yeah and to get
any training for bows you have to take that dedication fee because we use the free archetype
rule stuff like that as we actually do different stuff because because weirdly enough i kept looking
around there's not a six level dedication thing if you go down the medic dedication and i couldn't find
anything it was really weird um yeah it was really it was really odd but i got some awesome spells
because we have fourth level spells now for me and uh and rahua i believe and i got some neat stuff
it's gonna be real good and uh but of course the one and only uh one and only game master the one who
will make us suffer make us rotten make us all just implode in here in the world of time it is
lovely game master thirsty
hello i'm excited are you excited i'm excited that's what matters i'm excitement only my excitement
matters ah welcome to the session today everybody i mean hello hello hello i'm looking forward to
to post post dragon story storyline let's see what happens next i don't know anything could happen
there could be a boat there could be a chainsaw car there could be several oh what is happening next
what story do you have for us today well okay so previously on rot grind
um our band of destined chucklefox has made their way deep into the swamps of the solitude
where they've finally put to rest the demons of orin's past i mean it's not really a demon it was
actually a beloved friend kind of was a demon creature by the end however um we are going to
he is a good boy we're going to actually jump right into the session today um by sort of picking
off exactly where we left off um but a few things have happened now um the the body of gorgamunger or
what was left of gorgamunger has been laid to rest um as as soon as this this process is completed
um strangely tanhauser seems to slump over while standing uh his eyes lose their lustrous glow and he
just sort of has his head to dip as though someone has pulled a switch off in him uh similarly i would
like everyone who is not volley in the party to give me a perception check oh no why don't i get
to see because because you know reasons oh that's not very good 18 orin got a 21 and a baldric i'm
trying to roll but it's uh a little little laggy oh there we go 27 with a 27 all right um
baldric you notice that in the aftermath of the combat against gorg gorgamunger and the
he subsequent turning of of the dragon's remains as you've sort of been looking around perceiving the
the exact you know events going on you notice that volley looks a lot worse for wear in particular
where once um the the rot had sort of taken a a slow approach and it really focused itself more
around her her eyes it seems like it started to spread and you even see like black lesions coming
across her skin and the the area around her eyes is incredibly dark as though like someone had taken
almost black makeup and shot it into both of the eye areas it it's really telling once you notice it
um for for the others it's something you could just easily avoid while you know being in the thick of
the swamp but as you kind of stop and take stock of the situation baldric you know that things uh with
volley have taken a a dangerous turn uh baldric is going to as we're just kind of collecting ourselves
and preparing to move out further and whatnot he's gonna flag down volley volley get over here
what's the matter uh baldric is going to just kind of he's going to be invasive and he's going to
just like grab your head for a second oh personal space you you see his fingers kind of like go up to
your eye and spread your eyelids a little bit uh okay okay okay we don't really know each other like
this baldric like this this is really this is a lot what's happening you can kind of see through
the the slit in the helmet that he's just kind of like regarding you with a very uh cold assessment
bolly you are probably going to stay off the front line for now
what why what are you talking about putting it simply whatever rot you have inside you current
and he's going to kind of make a motion towards one of the obvious lesions on your skin
it's coming up to the surface you're like a stack of pawns verd except you're mostly mold instead of cheese
volley will push up her sleeves and kind of look herself over
oh oh shit i i i i i didn't but but i didn't i didn't go down there you you saw me
yeah but you did get a nice lungful of whatever the dragon decided to spit at you
i i i i didn't think it would spread without um i
baldric's just going to wipe his hand on his own jacket you should probably stay off the front for now
i because if you don't we're going to lose someone who was the only purpose we came out here in the first place
well glad to hear that you care
it'd be an awful waste of our time to come out here just for you to die inches from the finish
so for now let one of the other people take up the front
perua
sure
of course
i'll put myself up there too i can take a hit or two besides i probably got a few more goes in me
before whatever fending off that the great powers are doing on our behalf wears off
besides you got guns take use of them
yes it would behoove you to stay further back bald
yeah i guess i guess so
i i don't know how much i can help from back here though
we'll figure it out
i guess orin
as as you've you've sort of finished things up and are by the now immobile tan hauser
um you notice off the side of the the structure
um the the sort of ruined church you were you were previously fighting in
you see picturn squelchfoot has is sitting off of the side of some of the stone
where once was probably one of the windows
uh sort of like dangling his feet over the side looking out into the swamp
just kind of like sitting there kicking but it's the only motion that attracts your attention
yeah he's just kind of chilling over there
yeah yeah he's but he's like he's kind of kicking his feet like
back and forth and then just looking out into towards some of the brush in the swamp
yeah orin's uh
at this point i assume are we leaving right next to orin just
digging a grave for his friend
we've we've finished the grave we have finished the grave and that is literally where we're jumping in here
can i elaborate so i don't like put a
brought defeated creature in the ground that'll spread to the ground and then calls like an evil tree to come kill us later
then i that we burn the body at some point
fuck i have to rewrite the whole thing
god damn it
i remember i'm sitting there
all this fucking work
yes no no no yeah
please
damn bro
i was sitting here going
look it's very rare i do the walk away from my mic gag
give me this
go go ahead
i remember sitting there like after the session i was like
i've had this happen before
because when i was still working at paizo
baldman did the same same shit to me
because i put like this stupid artifact in the ground
and then he came back going
it's your fault lauren
everything's ruined
like you're the reason i'm dead or coming onto the surface
because you buried it in the woods
and i'm like
i have this again
i'm burning the body
not this time
not again
i know how you fuckers work
i've worked with all of you
so
i want to specify
like we just had a pyre
and it smells like dragon
he's like
you know whatever
he's just snorting it or whatever
and um
snorting it
yeah he's like
ah
ah
gorgamonger
yeah
uh
but
one thing i want to specify
that at least oran got some scales off of gorgamonger
got the fangs for everybody
want those details out there
because he wants to take the scales
and put it in his scarf
i'm sorry
it's a bunch of many details
but it's important to me
it is
but he will
but he will kind of come over
uh the pick turn
and go
and go
and go
thanks pick turn
for helping me uh
help me burn the body
the big body
and it was a lot of work
but
thanks for uh
thanks for
what's
what's the equivalent of a lighter
and
like an ever burning torch
just
just stick it in there
it'll just be whatever the fuck
magic is
yeah like spark
you know
lights
like a little fire
produced flame
i don't know
there's there's lots of options
we could just say you did it
yeah thanks for that
wait
i have a question
uh
i might even narratively clear this
and pick turn's cabin
like anytime he brings it back
is it like new
or can we like summon it
for like firewood
and then burn the cabin
what the fuck
and then when he brings it up again
it's new
that's
that's
that's too much effort
just cut down a tree
yeah
no no
i want to know
okay
who will lie down
it's very important to me
okay
whatever you
why am i lying down
hold on
just hold on
zorn's being very annoying
and he's his abstract bullshit
thirsty
okay
okay
the duration of cozy cabin
is 12 hours
uh
the walls of the hut
are simple and wooden
with small squares
glass windows
and it has one wooden door
um
it has a magical fire
inside of it
um
it's lit with magical light
um
fuck it
you can harvest wood
from this thing
you know like
sure
like
like
okay
like that
one sec
one sec
no no no no
this isn't capitulation
look look look
this isn't capitulation
is this what you're going to request
pick turn does
is summon one of his cozy cabins
so you can chop it up
and use it for firewood
no we probably want it for shelter
i'll take chat suggestion
and summon the protector tree
like a hundred times
and be like
oh my god
and then he just dies
so it was like labeled
with like a ton of protector trees
just on top of gorgamonger's corpse
and just burning it
for firewood
okay so
so did this
did you burning your
your favorite protector tree
happen before
or after you went
and said hi to pick turn
or was it like
you went and said
okay okay
before story wives
to go with
i'll do it paul
and then
then we burn the corpse
and
why do i feel pain
yeah okay
yeah gotcha
got all that
we heard the screams
and oran is like
just ignore it
just ignore it
why does this tree speak
it's trying to demoralize enemies
it doesn't know
how to do anything different
don't worry about it
beginning to think
oran just gets off
on suffering
or something
and
and
uh
he goes on to pick turn
like they just were helping out pick turn
i understand
you know
they wouldn't shut up
so i'm glad we finally
you know
got the fire going
oh yeah
that
that was
that was good
yeah
he doesn't make eye contact
with you
kind of looks
he looks the way
pick turn is looking
for a perception check
to kind of
yeah sure
please
see any movement
things like that
hey
please
find a thing
i'm pointing at
roll it
yeah
roll a 21
um yeah
a 21 is enough
for you to
to catch
that
he seems to be
looking at some
of the brush
maybe
30 feet north
of the structure
um
but you're noticing
that there
there's something
kind of awry
with it
like some of the
some of the
the brush
and the foliage
has been like
compressed
and it looks like
something has
maybe been put there
or thrown there
that's disrupted
how it should have
naturally grown
okay um
wonderful look
at the big turn
and go
um
you
see anything weird
looks a bit weird
over there
yeah
i
i think
i don't know
it's just
that that grass
looks
something
something
something's wrong
i i don't
i don't
i mean
i don't know
yeah
yeah
rahua
yes
oran
there's something
wrong with
with this bush
over here
i need another
opinion
what do you mean
something is wrong
with the bush
look just
just get over
here
okay
rahua
saunter over
yeah and you
come over
and like
immediately
oran can
point out
to you
this this
like
kind of
pressed down
uh
set of foliage
and bush
there
interesting
i
i'm not
familiar with
this
can i make
a nature
check on
this
uh
yeah sure
check on
my net
there we
go
that's gonna
be a 28
oh yeah
that's enough
for you to
tell like
the the
plant is
growing
normally
seems
healthy
it looks
to just
be some
like
some
tall grass
with a
bit of
like
brush
there
um
but
something
has
like
parted
it
like
something
was
maybe
tossed
there
or
thrown
there
or
placed
there
that
has
kind
of
caused
it
to
grow
out
at
odd
angles
now
would
the
appearance
alone
suggest
that
something
is
still
pressing
down
upon
this
where
it's
part
of
yes
interesting
uh
let me
see
I might
actually
help out
with
this
maybe
no
magic
might
not
be
a
good
idea
uh
can
I
do
an
arcana
check
perhaps
what
are
you
trying
to
do
I
guess
see
if
there's
some
kind
of
magically
invisible
placed
here
um
well
my
first
question
is
for
cantrips
do
you
have
detect
magic
I
don't
have
it
prepared
yeah
so
you're
not
going
to
be
able
to
like
really
immediately
detect
any
kind
of
magical
presence
um
without
like
seeing
what
the
object
is
whatever
it is
is
hidden
so
now
if
I'm
assuming
it's
a
magic
invisibility
can I
just
try and
dispel
magic
yeah
absolutely
then I
will
cast
dispel
magic
okay
sweet
you
uh
you
begin
invoking
and
casting
dispel
magic
from
a
distance
um
sort
of
magical
runes
dance
along
your
fingers
as
you
cast
the
spell
um
but
there
seems
to be
no
obvious
effect
huh
well
there's
I
honestly
couldn't
tell you
it
may
be
some
kind
of
magically
invisible
item
I
can't
seem
to
dispel
any
magical
effects
around
it
so
perhaps
it's
something
else
entirely
but
something
is
most
definitely
there
I guess
it is
wrong
in the
sense
that
something
is
sitting
on
this
piece
of
shrubbery
all right
well I
think we
should go
touch
somebody
who isn't
me
should go
touch it
well sadly
our magus
is out of
action
so
I'll
touch it
okay so
or
and you
just
head up
to
towards
it
you
were
way
too
excited
to
put
me
in
that
you
know
you
didn't
let me
like
talk
about
it
yeah
get in
there
get in
there
Baldrick's
going to
hold back
Orrin
and be
like
maybe we
should
have
the
very
sturdy
sentient
tree
do that
instead
that's
a good
point
so Orrin
you
continue
walking
towards
I'm going
to get him
by his
fucking
hood
and I
motion
for
Rahua
you mind
trying to
pick it
up
whatever
it is
I can
attempt
to
I'll
do
the
best
I
can
and
Rahua
will
go over
to the
non-existent
item
right now
because
somebody
forgot
to enable
visibility
as an
admin
and he
will
try and
pick it
up
so as
you walk
over
you
notice
that
there is
an object
there
it's just
under the
brush
like it's
kind of
sunk
into the
ground
which is
why it's
all parted
it appears
to be
a wooden
crate
oh
it has
a seal
on it
it has
it has
it has
like a
like a
stamped seal
that's been
put over
the over
the wooden
wooden
planks
on it
like some
kind of
like stamp
or paint
that's been
been adhered
to it
you can
also
you can
also tell
that some
of the
boards
along
the
what to
you would
be the
right-hand
side of
this box
are cracked
and the
ground
around it
seems
to
have like
a
black
oily
tinge
to it
now
black
and
oily
are we
talking
like
oil
or are
we
talking
rot
give me
a
give me
an
appropriate
check
what
what
skill
would
you
like
to
use
to
identify
nature
would
we
consider
rot
a
part
of
the
natural
word
um
i mean
it is
one of
the
skills
you
can
certainly
use
um
there
would
also
be
a
cultism
they're
like
you
would
get
different
results
based
on
the
specific
skill
you
used
i
see
i'll
actually
i'll
try
an
cultism
check
why
not
okay
yeah
that's
a
it's
enough
for you
to
tell
that
this
this
matches
up
with
some
of
like
what
you've
seen
before
also
what
the
group
found
cube
and
you
also
can
see
that
like
if
this
was
rot
that
sort
of
leaked
out
like
raw
rot
it's
long
gone
either
seeped
into
the
soil
or
used
for
some
other
purpose
the
residue
there
means
it's
sort
of
just
like
a
stain
of
sorts
thing
okay
uh
with
the
seal
that's
on
the
box
is
that
immediately
familiar
or
should
I
just
make
a
recall
knowledge
tech
this
society
oh
nat
I
needed
that
because
I
have
zero
very
nice
uh
yeah
so
you
would
recognize
this
uh
the
the
seal
as
belonging
to
the
medic
skilled
of
outset
interesting
what
is
the
medic
skilled
doing
with
distilled
or
processed
rot
it
is
the
same
symbol
and
sort
of
stamping
that
you
saw
on
the
crates
that
were
inside
the
perfectite
cube
Baldrick
remembers
that
wholeheartedly
beginning
to think
that
this
may
be
the
work
of
the
medic
skilled
and
this
wasn't
just
a
caravan
that
got
robbed
yes
I
would
be
inclined
to
agree
with
you
Baldrick
if
not
they
were
trying
to
shift
this
back
outset
lest
it
be
going
to
worlds
beyond
why
don't
we
take
control
of
it
then
so
that
way
it
doesn't
just
linger
out
here
and
become
a
hazard
for
someone
else
that
would
be
best
am
I
able
to
carefully
open
what
remains
of
the
box
there
I'm
assuming
most
of
it
still
attack
absolutely
yeah
you can
like
kind
of
crack
it
open
just
with
you
know
even
like
your
pick
like
appendage
can be
used
to sort
of
pry
the top
of
this
thing
off
as
you
do
what
you
can
tell
from
peering
inside
is
that
whatever
content
liquid
or
jelly
like
matter
has
all
seeped
out
it
stained
the
bottom
and
the
interior
sort
of
a
dark
kind
of
black
tinge
though
you
also
see
within
there
are
a
couple
tumorous
growths
that
look
as
though
like
small
bits
of
the
rot
might
have
even
taken
hold
in
the
wood
here
well
whatever
was
inside
is
mostly
gone
although
we
have
a
couple
hangers
on
hold on
I
think
I
might
be
able
to
care
of
this
one
myself
oh
yeah
and
if you
like
bring
bring
the
mace
down
as
soon
as
it
even
comes
close
there's
kind
of
a
shriveling
sound
like
and
then
it
retracts
even
before
your
mace
would
impact
it
this
like
these
tumors
just
dissolve
and
the
tiny
bits
of
rot
that
remain
are
gone
right
well
whatever
whatever
was
here
is
gone
for the
most
part
but
it's
not to
say
that
somebody
else
is not
carrying
around
the
cargo
elsewhere
how old
does it
look
well
judging
by
the
stains
of
rot
blight
on the
ground
and
the
surrounding
material
it
could
have
been
here
quite
some
time
especially
with
how
old
materials
were
within
the
perfectite
cube
it's
it's
tough
to
say
necessarily
but
it's
been
here
a
while
there's
a
shuffling
sound
that
all
of
you
can
hear
of
the
the
terrain
some
like
crunching
of
twigs
and
whatnot
on the
ground
as
a
figure
approaches
from the
west
of your
location
and you
recognize
it
to be
the
robed
earth
touched
individual
that you've
come to
know
as
Tosh
T
and
Tosh
T
sort
of
advances
towards
you
are
are
you
done
it
sounds
like
you're
done
here
i'm
guessing
after
the
screaming
and
stuff
stopped
yes
we're
done
here
we're
just
wrapping
up
some
unfinished
business
we're
cleared
now
and
we've
got
some
potentially
new
and
interesting
information
along
with
being
done
with
understood
and
Tosh
these
you know
onyx
eyes
sort
of
glaze
over
everyone
before
pausing
slightly
on
you
volley
hi
hi
yeah
um
there was
a little
more
rotten
here
than
expected
and
um
looks
like
your
girl's
got a
little
bit
of
a
cold
that's
not
a
cold
we're
aware
of
the
problem
Tosh
team
oh
oh
yep
okay
well
you
really
should
probably
come to
the
kaipoo
now
because
hand
kind of
like waves
up and
down
at
volley
that
is a
problem
yeah
i
imagine
it
certainly
is
how
how
how
does
volley
feel
like
do i
do i
feel
the
physical
effects
of
this
or
is
it
cosmetic
no
it's
it's
like
in fact
it's
entirely
cosmetic
as far
as you
you're
aware
like
you
you
don't
feel
anything
um
that's
that's
bothering
you
physically
um
you
you can
definitely
be shown
the
physical
effects
of it
like
these
lesions
and
whatnot
but you
there's
no like
drain
on you
um
if
anything
just
maybe
you're
like
a bit
quicker
to temper
as we've
discussed
before
but that's
more of a
defense
mechanism
than like
a
haha
something
is you
know
wiggled
its way
into your
brain
at least
as far
as you're
aware
well
i guess
we should
get out
of this
area
if it's
covered
in
this
correct
we need
to get
a move
on
anyway
yeah
i imagine
that we'll
want to
get it
seen
too
well
that's
why we're
going up
this way
anyway
hopefully
vick will
have gotten
up there
with her
crew
before we've
had a
chance to
and figured
out what
the situation
is
we were
gonna
meet
up
ah
damn
it
uh
thurston
can we
see the
map
i am
just
preloading
that scene
for y'all
right now
because i
think at
this point
you're kind
of wrapping
up here
um
and we
we sort
of cut
back to
uh
our
our lovely
overhead
uh
exploration
map
here
um
you should
see where
you are
right now
um
kind of
this this
area where
you encountered
gorgamunger to
the southwest
of your starting
location out at
zapples apps
uh yeah you
kind of
baldrick i just
assume you pull
out your map
yeah he's pulled
out his map
and he's kind
of roughly
tracing to
where we
were told not
to go by
mr alert which
we've already
basically determined
courtesy of uh
tosh d that the
taboo is there
and that's where
we'll find the
twang fault
uh so in
theory victrix and
the crew will be
there well at
where we said we
were going to
meet which is
probably not
directly there but
probably like
somewhere southeast
or like more
south southeast
um she like
tashti or
sorry they uh
look at the map
tashti sort of
gazing over
things and what
they do is they
they place their
their finger um
moving along this
path kind of like
okay north
northwest a bit
further northwest
a bit north and
then um sort of
like placing their
finger right about
here and sort of
um the sod
north kaibu is in
this area
um this area
over here
and their finger
sort of moves
over that
is
where caravans
tend to come
from
caravans right
so just
just random
caravans like from
the trade depot
oh no from
outset they they
send supplies to
the to the
kaibus as part
of our
long-standing
agreements
that's odd
all right
interesting that
the children of
the blaze would
be there
uh any
reports of
supplies going
up in flames
i've heard a
little bit of
that
well you
remember that
that was that's
what happened
with me
my i was part
of one of them
caravan then
we got all
sorts of
attacked and
baldrick motions
to pick turn
yeah that's
exactly my
point that's
why he didn't
want us to
go there he
might not be
after the
twang folk he
might just be
interested in
ambushing caravans
didn't want us
getting in the
way
oh shit
baldrick seems
to come to a
rather annoying
realization
huh
if he wasn't
after the
kaiboo or
any of the
twang folk
then he probably
just wanted us
to stay out of
his ambush
spot
probably
well hopefully
victrix shows
him what for
no we can't
just rely on
that son of a
bitch
so so if i
may and
pictures sort
of leans over
your map um
you know on
tippy toes
because halfling
i think caravan i
was part of was
was about here
and he like
draws an awful
like scratch
marks and
then i it was
coming from
from outset we
kind of we
kind of went
like that and
then then we
were supposed to
to go that
way so i guess
that makes that
yeah that makes
sense
baldrick's going
to fold up his
map irritably
well shit
yeah he's just
doodled all over
your map
yeah he's like
you're such a
good artist
can you draw
something else
for us
that's not what
i mean but
yes he did
just draw all
over my map
gonna keep
picturn's
terrible drawing
there
it actually does
help quite a bit
believe it or
not he's just
annoyed because
this map
yeah
oh shit
now we got
two problems
well that would
explain i guess
why this
eyelort person
uh wanted
oran to come
down here
because you know
and like you've
already put the
map away but
he's sort of like
pointing to where
things would have
been is like i
guess i guess
down down this
way is pretty far
from this way so
yeah that oh
oh oh i see
you know
that that this is
some kind of
triangle stuff
now there's a
school it's um
by cd willow
that's another
town over they
teach mathematics
there and they
do all sorts of
fancy things with
triangles that's
what my my
cousin eleni she
went there to
learn about
triangles you
know took a lot
of classes on
track oh she
was a
triangologist
well i don't
know if that's
how that works i
think it what it
more was was
some kind of
vulture clamps
his head on
his head on
picturn
well hold on
i was interested
no we don't
have time
i like that
speaker's not
here so you
have to enable
this fucking
little gremlin
odo
somebody's gotta
take up the
mantle
we gotta let
the little guy
bother people
and if if
speaker's not
going to enable
the botheration
as he is want
to do then it
falls to his
best friend
odo roshi
rider
so you've
clamped the
halfling's
mouth shut
yes
we need to
get a move
on
right
much as i'd
like to hit
up with the
twang folk
directly if we
don't alert
vic to what the
hell she's
bumbling into
that could be a
problem much as i
hate the bitch i
don't exactly want
her to die
the kiboo's in the
direction anyway
isn't it
yeah but the
problem is is
we're gonna have
to go up towards
where a lord
doesn't want us
to be which
leads me to
believe that he's
got something
waiting there for a
caravan that we
just told vic and
a whole bunch of
other random
people you get
what i'm getting
at the issue
here and
tashty sort of
looks over is
there's severe
wetlands roughly
and uh then
asks for your map
to repoint
he unfurls it
with the with
now picturn's
drawings now
smudged further
ruining the map
yeah um
points roughly
here and here
as part of the
the marshy
wetland to the
north these
three areas would
mean if you
wanted to go
on the path
you'd have to
go this way
and then up
um alternatively
we could go this
way towards the
kiboo and then
work our way
back which
looks over at
volley given
the state of
your companion
you may wish
to consult with
the speaker
first
yeah problem
is is that
putting extra
time on that
regard probably
puts that crew
at risk
not even just
so much vic
it's everyone
else i'm worried
about may have
hired him but
there's no excuse
to send people
off to die
that's if there's
something there
god damn i hate
being in the
solitude
i i think it's
pretty
yeah that bad
i can
kind of does
his way around
and i know how
to navigate some
of this stuff
and so i think
i think together
we can get
through it okay
and also i'm
sorry to ask
you and dylan
you know just
bump your mic
up by like 20
i got you
i've been i
bumped it up
like jesus christ
yeah i'm looking
at the audio
thing and i'm
like you're
like halfway
in it and
everyone else
is like touching
the yellow
like let's
what the fuck
it's microphones
man it's your
new one you're
figuring out
pain continue
it takes time
to dial it in
depending where
you're distance
from you know
as a whole
microphones are
weird
can i audible
now uh do
your balderick
voice just
just look at
all right yeah
it's me it's
me hey
oran you're
a dumbass
no the issue
is that when
you do it you
lower a lot
so you're like
well yeah
because it's
kind of hard
to keep
monotone and
be loud
yeah so
when you do
it just get
closer to
your mic
die
yeah there
you go
that's perfect
sorry to stop
but i know
some of you
are complaining
it's all right
continue
all right but
yeah oran's
like we
can do it
together guys
we can
let me just
cut straight
through i'm
pretty sure we
can get there
let's
all right
fine present
company is more
important let's
get going
don't have a
whole lot of
time
well we
should probably
rest for the
evening here
you all look
weathered
yeah we
probably should
make camp
first and rest
and then then
head out
yeah
right
probably for the
best to bed
down for the
night
yeah okay
baldrick's going
to deploy his
pup tent and
just call it
it's just right
now
picturn looks
over awkwardly
at the charred
remains of the
protector tree
then looks at
his hands
dare i summon
the cabin
now
yeah
you can
it doesn't
complain when
it's summoned
though
i
no
all right
i'll summon
the yeah
here's the
cabin
oran i'm
beginning to
think you
have a
problem
i you
think
you should
probably stop
let me explain
my life i've
gone across the
entire world
i've had
multiple of my
friends die
i got thrown
in prison for
protecting myself
and had to eat
a guy doing it
and i've been
going around this
entire giant city
just seeing the
horrors of life
and i had to
burn one of my
bestest friends
i'm kind of
fucked up
yeah oran that
doesn't excuse
you constantly
summoning a tree
that can feel
pain just to
burn it
you know what
he did
what did the
tree do
what did he
ever do to
you
i'm not even
like i'm not
even a
like a tree
like innately
but that's just
troubling what
what did the
tree do to
you i invoke
make tell
backstory now
yeah
no i want to
i've also just
cook oran okay
okay give me a
crafting check
oh i've got
seasoned i can do
that oh okay
remember i took
seasoned so i get a
plus one circumstance
bonus to craft food
and drink
very good
i was actually just
going to use that
on the ration so
that way we could
get like maybe some
form of benefit out
of it i don't know
maybe just cooking
food is just
something to pass
the time with
it beats burning the
fucking tree over and
over again oran
you know what he
did that murder
okay here we go
i'm going to i'm
going cooking oran
i'm not cooking oran
i'm cooking rations
oh okay
let him cook
oran wants to
help even it's
remarculous that
even with oh that
was a 19
oh no hang on
i want it was a
nine no yeah
yeah you you got
like a 20 i want
to assist with the
cooking um i want
to roll survival
check to find
ingredients can i can
i can i aid oh i
have an important
question oh yeah
does your assisting
involve summoning a
new protector to me
yeah i would love to
summon more but it's
a spell slot and we
already did the funny
so technically no but
the cabin already has
a magical fire inside
you don't you don't
have to set fires
either i can just use
my unused alchemist
fires it's fine go
get ingredients like
mushrooms oh okay
you're not taking a
campfire yeah i'm
another friend i'm
helping you get stuff
for the cooking so we
could do that i was
just using the rations
we had because you
know life uh so can
i can i do that
person can i aid yeah
you can give me a
survival check look
chat i've been i've
been playing a bunch of
kingmaker lately so i
just assume this is
what happens when they
make a hearty meal when
you camp um just you
know all right
the demon play i had
to play offline on
stream because i was
playing wrath of the
righteous i hate the
demon area and i
finally got out of it
and i love when you
finally come out like
like don't know really
spoilers you come out
of a situation look
around like oh yes
they all fucked up and
you got to fix it again
so it's you're the hero
yeah it's getting
annoying all right
survival check
i saw it it went on
that one and then it
bounced to that seven
it rolled i rolled the
22 okay you are able
to assist um bringing
some ingredients which
uh baldrick um manages
to to turn baldrick
what kind of what kind
of uh ration food are
you are you making for
everyone here i'm
presuming that the
rations we picked up
from zavill zap's
place are probably just
like basic travel
provisions like dried
meat and other kinds of
shit yeah absolutely
yeah i'm literally i'm
just rehydrating it and
turning it into like
something that we can
fry in the pan that
actually has like because
people like hot food
more than they like cold
food you know except
for who he's a tree i
don't eat exactly i mean
you still do but yes he
sometimes tries if you
remember the egg
it didn't go well to talk
about that regardless
please don't make me eat
more eggs today baldrick is
using the mobile the the
walking pot to cook up
like a stew out of like
dried meat and bread and
other kinds of shit it's
it's better than just all
that shit cold
so i would presume it's
yeah that's the walking
stew we will keep it
thirst and i have a
question can we actually
increase our speed by
being able to use the
walking the walking
cauldron as a mobile form
of rationing i mean aren't
we aren't we aren't we
camping i don't i don't
think we i mean like for
like future for the
future purposes how
moving cabin i mean
that sounds like a
fifth level version of
the cabin cabin but
yeah that'll be for
later but yeah i wanted
to ask that yeah no
absolutely absolutely
especially because you
you've made these checks
here i assume part of
what you can do too is
like use your walking
cauldron to to better uh
keep the provisions inside
of it so that you now
have this little buddy who
walks with you um and
and travels along the
way um all right
his name is stew
his name is did i did i
help with my aid check
yes which which which
did bring him up to a
30 which makes the uh
makes the the movement
very very fast in fact
it's gonna pick up your
speed quite a bit
um no okay if it's
normal it's just plus
one um yeah but but
as he's cooking stuff
oran just comes over
you know he's got
mushrooms and herbs and
stuff and he has the
equivalent of like like
worms that looks like
gawk or whatever from
like star trek and he
just just throws it in
the pot and has a big
grin on his face i'm
rolling to intercept
okay i'm gonna what
do i what do i roll
here reflex yeah sure
let's go with reflex
i roll i roll a
fucking reflex because
i'm not letting you put
that shit in my i saw
that 20
um well that is higher
than the skill check
that orn had so i'll
i'll you you manage to
prevent him from putting
the full gawk in but
get the like the nice
mushrooms and whatnot
yeah i would like to
assist i hate you
wait who are you
assisting i'm going to
assist baldrick right
now okay uh-huh okay
uh ruhe is going to
go over to the pot look
at it he's going to
move his he's gonna
cock his head just
slightly as if the
motion is someone
sniffing a pot he
doesn't have a nose he
can't really smell
okay and he's going to
hold put his hand up
to his chin stroke it
for a little bit
contemplatively i can
speak today
okay and extend a
hand over the pot
as a
just blot of weird
star stuff manifests
and a whole chicken
drops in as i cast
food create food
a whole chicken
please tell me it's
dead i don't okay
i'm done with i'm done
with the suffering and
cruelty today can we
stop conjuring things to
kill them i mean it's
good it's good it's
good i don't think it's
hold on hold on
like a living chicken
erndo has a great
point i agree that's
let's not make cruelty
needless thurston due to
my chaotic nature can i
roll a 1d3 to determine
if the chicken is alive
dead or fully cooked
alive dead fully cooked
in that alpha you better
be watching this shit with
the biggest grin on your
fucking face he is
little he messages me so
much to be like yes
or is excited for a
fucking three piece he's
ready like he's waiting
he sees what's happening
let's find out okay
living dead cooked roll
that d3 please it's alive
i'm going to roll a
reflex save to punch the
chicken out of the way
you didn't want animal
cruelty yeah i know i
zoran boiling the
chicken is worse okay
okay okay okay what
22 seven again um
god what's what's
fucking i don't like how
am i adjudicating i
actually know it's 23
because that would be the
spell dc of create food
apparently um so my god
look look look okay i
also want to point out
chat i'm putting it into
to chat here there's
create food which
rahua just cast so
this whole thing of
like i'm gonna do some
like narrative with
rations and and
whatnot like literally
this whole time hulky
could have been like
okay i cast the spell
and we move on we
have turned this into
like a 15 minute
bit in which hulky's
like this spell that
would have made
everything fuck that
i'm gonna use to call
a chicken oh we're
not going anywhere
let's be honest well
hold on hold on
okay because the spell
text right there says it
creates enough food to
feed six medium
creatures for a day
how many fucking
chickens is that
thurston i don't know
how fucking hungry
are you why are you
making like a decent
family of four like a
whole ass chicken yeah
one chicken would do
it how much chicken do
you eat hulky i don't
know i don't eat a
chicken taken into
individual pieces is
eight pieces because you
can cut the breast in
half and you have the
upper and the lower
breast that means you
have eight pieces you
have two wings four
breast chunks two
thighs two drums
culinary school with
baldrick when rahua goes
to order chicken and they
say what pieces do you
want he says yes
true yes can i get the
head i just i can't
fucking wait for the
inevitable youtube
comments that are just
gonna be so based on the
mass of an average human
being the number of
chickens that would be
required this is your
homework for today chat
find out how much this
actually makes because
this goes out the window
because i'll have you
know i can eat a whole
rotisserie chicken and
that can be one meal it's
true worker he does it at
his fucking desk exactly
that is not at his desk i'm
not fucking around all
right you know what i'm just
gonna say we progress to the
next day and whatever
happens to the chicken
we can we've almost got
cook serve roe too we've
almost got the sequel in
the bag we're going to
start streaming cook serve
delicious i'm gonna make
zoran play it
oh for fuck's sakes yes
with your 30 and whatever
the hell all that was you
get a plus one uh chicken
bonus and then you rest you
all heal up to gain all
your spells please put that
on and then the party
begins making its move
this way which takes
approximately two days
instead of three days
because of the chicken
bonus during you do not
have the resources to make
puffo stop asking me to do
that polly just like we
finally have done we've
done it we learned which
bonus came first it was the
egg
why the fuck do i not have
mod privileges that was
disconnect people from this
call
right click and just kick
you the fuck out it's
getting to my brain
the best option i have is
remove friends it won't let me
disconnect but i'm going to
floss my teeth until i hit
jawbone
we move quicker because we
have funny pot full of
probably a decent ration stew
and also just like a whole
boiled chicken
what's the pot's name
stew oh yeah yeah stew
nice okay
that's to you stew
okay that hex just move
i just suggested it because
the border was a bit off
does he respond to his name
is the most important thing
are we going to encounter
another funny creature how
do you train the can we
get those buttons that like
let's say words we're going
to clicker train yeah it
would be like mad mad
hurdy hungry mad it's
gonna turn into coco the
gorilla
r.i.p coco the gorilla we
lost a real one
full of ick
full of stew
full of stew
we teach the magic call it's
going to die someday
full of liquid can't pee
existent sad
what the fuck is this game
suddenly like dwarf fortress
now what's happening
the carp stands up
i got it because i can't
drink alcohol
thirsting to deal with the
pain
how many hydras do i need
okay
um all right we're at an
impasse wetland or
fucking woods
um well okay it's right
okay okay so wait wait wait
wait wait
two days past to get you
out of the swamps into
into a more uh grassland
plains area though it is
still wet and boggy the
weather takes a better
turn it's overcast but it's
not constantly raining
which is good for all of
you
um there's little little
bits of sunlight that are
visible but it's mostly the
sun being obscured by
clouds
during this time tachty takes
the lead sort of directing
you along paths as you make
your way out of the the
swampland where um site b
and gorgamonger were
located as you carry on
you eventually come across
um areas after exiting the
swamplands and into this
plain area um where you see
what appear to be stone
foundations roughly
rectangular some in the area
of like 10 by 10 others
being as large as like 50 by
50 foot um stone foundations
that come out of the ground
some of them rising above the
ground like almost four or
five feet others actually just
like level with the dirt in the
ground here they're all sorts
of cobbled together stones that
looks that look like they've
come from various different
structures um you can see the
remains of camps on top of them
what appear to be campfires that
have long burned out or you
know detritus of things that
people have left behind from
camping in these areas and so you
start to notice these with
increasing rapidity as you carry
on your journey
yes earned a lore
yeah i'm gonna turn to tachty so
do you it have the kaibu's been
camping here is that uh what we're
looking at or is this a different
camp the different kaibu's of the
solitude they they move with
regularity so as not to
over harvest in an area earn the
ire of local wildlife all of those
things um these are these are
foundations we are taught that you
you lay foundations down but are
willing to depart from them when
you need to you'll see these
scattered throughout the solitude
these are places for campers to to
rest you won't see them as close to
the the large city but you will see
them further and with more
regularity out here to allow for
people to set up residence the the
kaibu of the sodden earth which i
belong to it's it's built on similar
foundations oh all right well i'd
rather it be the kaibu's than
whatever the fuck the medics guild was
doing over here so glad it's you guys
yes these have been here for quite some
time they are the foundation of our
lives in a way tashti sort of nods
well i like it i mean well what was
that baldrick i'm sorry i talked over
you i do that sometimes i'm a real bad
person crop rotation of a sort jesus
christ
i guess it is sort of crop rotation in a
way crops oh let me tell you about
crops friends now i'm good back how
long till the next location um so i
love that you fuckers i love that you
fuckers are like ha ha chicken vaha
funny joke i'm trying to do picture
you're like fuck off let's move to the
next
i know i know look i just i like put
that demon on thurston you realize
these are two different tiers of joke
correct
that's true that's true pick turn is
is very high that's exactly we only
need so much of him he is like the
garum masala of this group we are the
garlic powder we need to use him very
sparingly otherwise this will taste
entirely too much like a giant pot of
cinnamon i agree we should kill him
now
no i think we should boil you it won't
taste very good have you tried good
next location um let's let's uh keep on
trundling
we're just kind of dragging by the way
we're dragging the fucking disabled
inactive tanhauser behind us yeah yeah
we're just taking turns carrying him
no we've got him in like a sled because
none of us are strength characters that
we made like a dumb cart the people
so yeah no we'll we just have him put
on the dirigible because he counts as an
item right now he's not a person true
yeah i put him in my pocket we're
dragging
okay okay well you you continue carrying
on
leaving pick turn behind
pick turn get over here little guy i
want to hear about your crops
i mean again we we got what we needed
out of him we're good now
all right
that's our little guy that's my son
listen pick turn pick turn effectively
outmoded himself he made himself
irrelevant if you want if you wanted
to keep being employed by us he should
just have had us walk in circles until
we got tired of him and killed him for
food all right
corporate managers think like
exactly wow all right you you carry on
for another um two days of travel so
at this point you've been traveling
through through the swamps of the
solitude for roughly four days two of
which were getting through some some
thick swamplands then more of like an
open plainsy area you start to make
your way towards uh what is clearly a
more densely packed forested terrain as
you as you are traveling along this way
um you you kind of go closer towards
this um this wetlands to the north the
thing that tashti had sort of told you
to avoid and as you're about reaching
midday on the fourth day of your
journey roughly you know seeing seeing
this forested area in the distance you
see something that does attract your
attention um probably like very far off in
the distance but it is visible is a
brass spire rising out of the wetlands
and you can see water around the base of
this thing you're slightly elevated this
brass spire is surrounded by several
floating concentric circles of iron um
and they they look more like rings that
float around it some of them are cracked
and broken others of them are um like
whole and and you can see them moving um
and and there's like little arcs of
electricity that seem to go between some
of the broken pieces as it floats there
this is way off in the distance you're
guessing maybe even like a couple miles
away to to your your relative north but
you see this structure jutting out of the
uh the wetlands i i tapped hashti on the
shoulder hey
yes
what the fuck is that
sorry i i know that you live here so
you're probably the best person to ask
in this scenario i know that you're not
an expert on every uh thingamajig in
these swamps but what the fuck is that
leftovers
can you elaborate that's really cryptic
well that's that's what we call them
they're they're they're leftovers from
all the people who've come to to take the
city
and what particular one is that
uh well all of you can give me checks on
this thing um occultism being the uh
occultism the preeminent choice
none of us have because none of us
because none of us
because
i'm
i beg you
intelligent
i'm cut to rahua who has occultism
true i'll just give you hello i'm a product of dark sciences
there you go yeah this is why i was asking the ex the the lady who'd been here the longest you know so she could tell us you want to have her role too thurston
i'm not gonna never mind 27
i'm not gonna lie oh no like as he was there like what the fuck i really wanted her to turn around you hear like the visa
like the then he starts going like and he starts explaining it like v sauce oh god
oh god
it's like why are leftovers it's like oh no
all right um
rahua as as like as as volley is asking and and then baldrick are you know asking tash t about this
you look up at this and if you've traveled the solitude you know once or twice you kind of know your way around
you maybe have you know done some things on local fauna forms and all sorts of you know learning and
information this structure is something you've heard about um it is a leftover from some prior
conquest attempt of outset um it is
several hundreds maybe even thousands of years old um but the only thing that it is known as
is it is a zeskorin reality engine that is all that is known about it oh okay
interesting
everyone's bickering who was just looking up at this massive structure
oh that's a zeskorin reality engine is it not uh gesundheit so what is it i'm gonna kill you for that
in minecraft in english four eyes
um so that just happened no
that's that's a that's a name i've heard yep
it spins what it spins i don't i don't know much more about it
there's wait wait wait it still spins well not ghosts they're a bit different but
yeah well look it's spinning and like you can see that the the circles that are you know floating
within the the brass spire like they're they're turning and you could you can see this punctuated by the fact
that like some of the some of these these rings that are turning around it have like broken chunks or you
know even breaks in the ring itself they're crackling with electricity
okay so let's let's let's gather our knowledge here
it's haunted it spins it's a reality engine
yes
the those are three incredibly disconcerting things for a giant brass tower to be
very much so
although if it is a reality engine by semantics alone i would assume that there are less ghosts and
more reflections of oh i don't know possible equations of the self that beyond time and space
beyond your comprehension most likely
there are so many things that are beyond my comprehension i know isn't it wonderful
civic
ghost not ghost ghost might actually be you i would suggest we violate it
hmm
well there wouldn't probably should not go traipsing around inside it i not without learning more
hopefully it doesn't factor into our little scenario here
ah hopefully not
and tashi sort of turns and it's like we're going to head into the woods it'll
keep that thing out of our line of sight for some time which is for the better
people tend to remember things they didn't remember when they look at it for too long
hold on repeat that
i said what i said remember things
that they're not supposed to remember when they look at it for too long
yep
that's a detail
and tashi turns and just keeps walking
hold on
well now i want to look at it
it's volley looking at it
i i i turn and look at it like now i'm curious
give me a will save volley
oh oh of course naturally uh well
fail
fail
that was a two
that was a two
every save
every i mean it wasn't a one it was a two
you know what that's true we're not rotten for yet
you you have two hero points as well i mean you don't know what this will do but you have
i don't know he's gonna take it away from you you use those to not die
i just think it would be true i just think it would be funny
you know what i think is gonna happen i think thurston's gonna be like you remember spending a hero point
yeah you just you weren't stealing my good jokes
no i look up at this tower and amygdala's there
and polly's just like oh
oh hunter hunters
oh you talk about amygdala
we say amygdala
true
yeah yeah i'm gonna look at the tower
what what
show me the horrors
all right you gain one insight point
and then we'll carry on
yeah you you you stare at it and it just looks to be some
some strange brass spire with rotating metal rings around it
thurston
yes hulky
can i peep the horror
oh yeah absolutely you want to give me a little save
sure do
sweet
this is relevant to my interests
i am 24
okay okay okay
i don't like i don't want to tell you if that's a success or failure i mean
i hate me who knows oh boy
would you you i believe for who you have a hero point too which you can certainly use on that
should you choose to
that is true i could always use a hero put on that
yeah you could
why
for uh
for uh
as you're being silly
the
the hero point bot's having you
oh
oh
i'm gonna contact the guy
but still keep going
uh
yeah
i'll we'll figure it out but uh
okay
i'm gonna contact the guy
but if anyone's confused why it's not going down
i'll i'll spend a hero point
i'll humor you
i'll probably get a lower result
well that's even better
i mean hi
no 30
oh god
um
as you
you stare at this thing
you
you have a
flash
there is
there is like a
a deep flash
and you see that
you are
you are standing in the solitude
um
and there is a caravan
that is
on fire
it is
tossed over
burning
um
everything about it
is
is like destroyed
there's screaming
shouts
you're
you're there
it's vivid
but everything is kind of in black and white
um
and
and as that happens
and you're
you're seeing this
um
you can see that
the caravan
that's knocked over
um
there are several
boxes that have fallen
out of the side of it
and you
you immediately
recognize
the symbols
that are on the sides
of these crates
as the ones that you saw
in the cube
and
at site b
uh
the symbol of the medics guild
um
and as that happens
you feel
something
run
through you
like from behind
through your body
and you feel yourself
discorporate
back into standing
and staring at the spire
oh
well that's not
or maybe it is
oh
did you
did you see something
so there's a caravan
on fire
like
completely destroyed
okay
or maybe it will happen
or maybe it has happened
i don't know
but either way
that caravan
is full of those crates
those crates
full of horrible
rot
substrate
oh
and it was on fire
and tipped over
yeah
who told you
it was tipped over
oh oh
i thought you said that
did you peep the horror too
no i did not
peep the horror
oh
i'm just
metagaming
you see
oh i see
that's standard
thing here
you're not making me feel
a whole lot better
about this detour
we have to make
okay
so it was on fire
and the medics guild
boxes were in it
i mean
rip bozo
i guess
i mean
good riddance
sensibly
if the caravan
is on fire
carrying those
rot boxes
one of two things
comes to mind
either
we
are destroying
that caravan
or
elort
in his men
have torched it
in which case
do i ask
if
they would be
the ones
destroying the caravan
are we the bad guys
trying to stop them
no we
haven't
stopped them
but i have a hard
time believing
elort is trying
to do anything
good
oh i mean
same he's
clearly evil
baldrick places
a hand on
on rahua's
shoulder
rahua
let's
try to
preclude
both of
them
from getting
any sort
of headway
shall we
of course
i don't think
either of them
are particularly
nice and i
don't think
any one
gaining something
over the other
is anything
we should
look forward
to
oh no i
mean we
should certainly
destroy those
whenever we
come across
them so it
may just be
that we're
going to
and setting
it on
fire
nevertheless
whether or
not this
has happened
or is yet
to happen
it's not
filling me
with a lot
of hope
for our
little band
of mercs
so let's
get a move
on yeah
i wouldn't
be putting
much stock
in visions
you know
they get
they get
awful strange
i had a
grandma
she she
saw things
and you
know she
thought that
if she dug
in the same
spot once a
year every
year that
she would
end up
finding gold
never found
gold
i had a
vision of
drowning once
it's fucked
up
well don't
ground that'd
be bad
fuck dude
it sure would
be let's
go
that's some
great wisdom
there man
thanks
don't drown
uh yes as
you like look
at picture and
he's like clearly
like jauntily
walking behind
tosh day as
you head into
this forested
area how
about we take
a quick break
here and then
we will come
back
absolutely
let's go uh
let's go get
some snacks
we'll be right
back
don't go
anywhere
brb
but gonna
see you later
brb
brb
brb
zoran is
about to die
when he dies
he will die
in real life
forever
this is fun
but it doesn't
have to be
through your
support on patreon
we can find a way
to incrementally
slow this train
before he is
destroyed in
complete agony
forever
in exchange for
your patronage
you'll receive
access to the
show early
unique monsters
lore spells
and items
what a deal
and that's not
even counting
your early access
to stream vods
behind the scenes
content and
more
that's a lot
of value
just listen to
this testimonial
from a long
time patron
who's this
zoran guy again
terrific stuff
please head over
to patreon.com
forward slash
narrative declaration
because if you
don't
we're here in
suffering
uh-oh sisters
uh-oh sisters
an anonymous gufter
is giving 10
gufts to the
guft community
thank you for
the guft that
stops
thurston
thank you
we're currently
starting and i
think our uh
our bot is
working now
so thank you
for helping
with that
and um
thurston
we're currently
suffering right
now
thank you
grogu
well you are
making your
way uh
further into
the swamps of
the solitude
under the
direction of
one tashti
um you've
been making
your way
now you're
we're coming
on to the
sixth day of
travel as
you're as
you're now
going through
a bit of a
forested region
leaving the
zescoran reality
engine behind
you and the
strange visions
uh held by
by one ball
of pure anarchy
known as
rahua
your travels
continue on
um the
the terrain
continues to
be difficult
to move
through tashti
deftly leading
you through
um oran and
rahua don't
struggle quite as
much but
vali and
baldric it's
it's annoying
it's it's it's
just a pain to
get through this
half of the time
you're stepping
and you're
stepping into
muck and
schlocking
water it's
it's just
bad but
you eventually
come to
a bit of a
bit of a
further um
area swampland
away from some
of the trees
it has a
sense of like
water streaming
through it
probably from
the the
wetlands that
are now more
to your east
than anything
else um
there yes
real quick are
we still taking
into account all
the things we're
doing as we're
moving like
scouting investigate
track investigate
avoid notice
search yeah
i'm like unless
there's like any
any big changes
i'm just kind of
going with what
we had as the
defaults there
cool if you want
to change them
up you can let
me know but
like i i'm kind
of going with
some some flat
checks here
because we we
don't need to
roll for every
hex unless there's
something going
on um and
yes they are
just dragging
uh tanhouser
actually tanhouser
is on the
floating disc
uh no i i think
it'd be funnier
where we just
kind of like put
a rope under
his arm and
we're just
just dragging
and we just
have a long
line and
because of
that i want
to change
my activity
to covering
our tracks
also i'm
constantly
feeling back
the ditch
why you
you just
have him
at the end
so like
your footsteps
and then
there's just
like your
tracks are
gone it's
just a
a furrow
from tanhouser
we walk in
a single file
to hide our
number because
tanhouser
destroys all
tracks
uh but
yeah i've
i've provided
the image in
our quick
general chat
here oh
yes good
good very
good
mind freaked
ah okay
um tanhouser
you uh tanhouser
you you're not
here that's the
thing i can go
next door and
tell him
take his ice
cream we
discussed this
you need to
take his ice
cream away from
him um all
right so as
as you uh
as or and
as you you
you perform
the your
your track
covering um
and then
baldrick your
your question
was about
exactly what
you were doing
so i'll i'll
i'll adjust
orin to be
cover tracks
now um
which is a
lot trickier
cover tracks
maybe this
won't no
of course it'll
mess everything
up that's
cool uh
oh god i
can't even
click picture
it's all it's
all going to
hell
i hate the
texting and
foundry that's
the one thing
i just bugged
the hell out
of me
it's like here
i think
fucking hell
no i don't
want to click
on picture
fuck you
sorry
there we
get
mumble
crumble
look i
need it to
look nice
on the
screen
and i'm
just
fuck you
okay
all right
so as i was
saying you're
carrying on
the wetlands
are sort of
seeping into
this area
some of the
trees have
come down a
bit
a fog has
swept in
and you are
making your
way
there are some
like dead
desiccated
trees
like puddles
of water
and each of
you is
making your
way
um what i
will ask
of our
people
because i
think right
now you're
you're sort
of taking
um
you're
you're
you're
you're
you're
you're
approaching
things very
carefully still
with tashty
tashty leading
the way
um
i am
going to
i think
what i'm
going to
have you
do here
is as
you were
traveling
along
um
volley you
were avoiding
notice can i
get a stealth
check from
you please
yes
uh
decent that's
a 22
22 okay
cool so
are you like
with the group
or are you
kind of like
away from
them all
what's what's
the what's
the the plan
for volley
here um
i'll stick
close enough
to the group
they probably
don't want me
wandering off
and falling
into a pit
okay okay
absolutely um
now the rest
of you i know
are providing
a bunch of
skills um
so what i will
get and you
know some of
you are
investigating as
well baldrick
you're scouting
so i'm assuming
baldrick you
might be a
little bit ahead
but not far
i will be
ahead i can
do a stealth
as well to
stay out of
sight because
i'm not trying
to give away
our position
especially given
that we are
i'm now
particularly on
alert that
we're gonna
blunder into
alert's men
doing something
unpleasant
yeah um can
you um can
you please give
me a stealth
check
stealth coming
at you and
by the way
since i hit
level seven
yes i'm doing
that at a
plus 14
oh shit
you're a
master
that's a
33 too
you are
you pull out
a cardboard
box and no
one can see
you at all
i can use a
smoke bomb
i'm powerful
you lead
right
if you guys
want to like
stealth
we need that
because i have
a plus three
to stealth
and we would
rather use
yours
so here
how it works
is if you're
gonna follow
the expert
basically you
guys have to
all you all
get to roll
at the lowest
based on what
i understand of
this
let me see
quiet allies
if i'm avoiding
notice so
unfortunately no
that would be
only if i was
avoiding notice
i'm scouting
quietly
oh yeah
well you just
go do that
i'll i'll wait
here for you
yeah you guys
you guys just
slow up behind
i will scout
ahead
he's he's he's
scouting scouting
up ahead
all right
um for
ruhu and orin
can i get
perception checks
because you were
both kind of on
that like well
investigating and
covering tracks
so
sure
i'll even do
one for the
little old
pick turn
squilch foot
ah very
good
oh okay
okay
okay
um
music it just
randomly does
have to go
into a fire
i'm like
yeah
um
perception check
oran
oh sorry
i'm i'm
fighting with
the uh
the music
i tried to
make it
all cool
and it's
not being
cool
yeah there
we go
all right
perception check
oh okay
thank you
oran rolled
a 24
sweet
all right
you are
making your
way up
ahead
however as
you are
uh
advancing
um
you
notice
something
or at
least
some
of you
notice
something
um
you notice
that there
are several
creatures
that are
heads
down
amongst
the full
or amidst
the foliage
here
um
they appear
to be
um
kind of like
yeah
basically like
hiding within
some of the
the tall
grass of the
area
uh i'm
going to
move us
over to
here
and hope
this all
works
okay
and
all of
you
are
doing
doing
just great
as you
appear here
you can see
up ahead
there are
several sort
of avian
creatures
that are
amidst the
foliage
they look
like they
were ready
to pounce
on you
uh or
were preparing
some sort
of ambush
however
uh you
have uh
you've seen
them and
they don't
seem aware
that you've
spotted them
just yet
it looks like
they're waiting
for you to
get closer
um
they appear
to be like
almost rust
covered
chickens
because that's
the theme
of the episode
apparently
chickens
wow
look at
these things
where can
we get
these
thurston
uh
you
can
get
these
in a
pdf
that we
make
that
one
uh
hulky
mccrow
uh
did the
writing
for
this is
on our
patreon
this is
the uh
swamps
of the
solitude
uh
pdf
and these
creatures
that our
party has
no idea
what they
are
you can
find them
in their
stats
and all
the cool
tokens
and handouts
in there
bam
sales pitch
yeah
yeah sweet
if only i
had a pdf
to know
what these
things were
that's exactly
what folly
says
yeah
all right
but all of
you've seen
this um
so what i'm
going to do
is since
you've kind
of seen
these these
critters
like hole
down in
the grass
um i'm
gonna begin
an encounter
here with
baldrick you
stop just
in time to
see these
yes
what would
you like to
do with
your uh
three actions
i'm gonna
inquire are
they prepping
to ambush
themselves or
are they just
kind of here
uh not
themselves it
looks like this
is some kind
of pack that's
spread out like
they're working
in concert
they're just
very spread out
probably to catch
a wide net and
then pounce
all together
in that case
since uh i
would i'm gonna
ask is my 33
stealth going to
be what i go
into this with
as a role or
do i have to
roll again
i've already
got you an
initiative that's
why you're
first oh
and they have
not seen me
correct
birds
he's leaving
baldrick is
going to uh
survey each of
them just kind
of like waiting
in ambush
yeah he's going
to just make a
series of hand
gestures behind
him so that
they don't hear
anything
okay i like i
want to know
how you alert
chicken in
hand gestures
that's just
because because
i love it but
well baldrick
first throws up
a hand that
looks like a
claw and
then he like
closes it into
a fist and
then circles it
around like
facing upward
and then he's
going to point
at roughly where
they are adjacent
to his position
can i make a
check to see if
i know what the
hell he's talking
about uh
well when we
get to your
turn absolutely
um however
for funny
for funny
for funny
yeah for
for funny
like on my
you don't have
to do it and
make me waste
an action you
can just i'm
perceiving it i'm
there it can be
like a like a
save i have to
do to understand
what he's
communicating yeah
well you already
rolled high enough
perception or in
that you can see
these things too
yeah but to
understand it
that's what i'm
saying i'm gonna
vibe it on you
bear
i just imagine
alpha listening to
this like jack
nicholson yes
dot gif like
since he hears
fucking sickos
haha yes
yes
do it for the
content
okay fine fine
for the fucking
content roll me
whatever whatever
i don't know
you should be
happy because if
i ever i'll tell
you what i can
roll one
first i'm gonna
i'm gonna gm you
here because i'm
dictating this
now
zoran
yeah i'm gonna
ask you a
question yeah
is your int or
your wisdom
higher
my wisdom
thurston may i
petition you to
have him roll
against his
wisdom
yeah he can
roll he can
definitely roll
against his
wisdom yes
so you want me
to roll like
my d my will
save or my will
dc would be
like 25
yeah
so i
no no no no
no no no no
against your
wisdom which
means your
wisdom is
really high
so you would
have to roll
incredibly low
to fail like
looking at this
if we were to
say turn this
into a ratio
of uh
one out of
twenty which
is a standard
dice your
wisdom is
currently a
nineteen which
means you
would only
fail the
understanding
check on
a one
all right
so flat
let's see
let's do
it
i saw that
one oh i
saw
i'm helping
you create
i'm helping
you create
content because
if that was a
one you could
have clipped that
and then shit
your pants for
twenty hours
because that
would have been
fine
oh my god
like subscribe
i rolled a
one okay
fucking what
are you doing
orn sees
his hand
signals and
like you'll
see him nod
looking like
encouragingly
like yeah
yeah got
okay uh
what's what's
what's your
actual actions
gonna be
okay now that
we've gotten
that exceedingly
long scenario
out of the way
uh baldrick is
going to move
uh what is my
move it's twenty
i think right
yeah twenty
he's going to
move twenty
there and that
will put me in
range of this
bird
let me think
actually can i
get further
ahead
so what i have
to re-roll
stealth to
remain in
stealth
um you're
basically going
to be stealthed
up until the
point you take
a like combat
like a combative
action is how
i'm going to
to put it
here
the hell do
you understand
erindel is that
they technically
would have
already made
their section
checks kind
of versus
your stealth
check kind
of so your
stealth until
you take a
hostile action
because then you
would reveal
yourself so if
you i'm trying to
see what other
actions i can
take except for
attacking because
i'm not seeing
any that i can
take fair because
we lost them all
under the uh
yeah if anything
else uh you
can just you
can uh
recall knowledge
of them get
some information
on them yeah
like while you're
thinking about
what else i can
do because you
can do it like
so i think
i'm going to
move into
position and
then recall
knowledge i'm
going to move
there okay
just like along
where the water
line is there
yeah
it'll be a
nature check
target that guy
and nature
check
yeah
this should be
interesting
no nature's not
very high so i
don't know what
no because that's
i'm not going to
do that because
that's only a
plus one
need to think
about what else
i can do then
hmm
they can all
still see me
right
it appears they
have not seen
you
no they
oh yeah yeah
your group yeah
absolutely
can i attempt
to do some
sort of tactical
thinking and
do perhaps
uh i wanted to
open my sheet
not close it
thank you foundry
very cool
uh i wanted to
roll like uh
there's no
leadership right
so there's nothing
i could do there
i do like a
lore warfare to
try and maybe
give them an
advantage of some
kind
um sure but
how are you like
planning on
communicating this
again hand
signals so
okay okay yeah
i'll give i'll
give it to you
uh doing it via
hand signals is a
bit difficult i'm
gonna give you a
minus two
circumstance penalty
well that's fine
by me i'm going
to roll it
modifier minus
two
add
and i am going to
make a series of
hand gestures trying
to dictate people
how to move
through so we can
properly ambush the
ambushers and
hopefully it works or
it could just be
comical too
oh that's a pretty
high roll that's a
28 is enough for
you to like convey
tactics you can you
can probably like
alert them so they're
aware of the exact
placement of all of
these things so that
the map makes sense
to them
um and also
probably like
before any of
them act they
i'll grant them
like a plus one
bonus uh two
attack rolls
as you kind of
like give your
signals yeah
okay
i mean i'm not
gonna come up with
a big endearing
plan because i
don't foresee this
being terribly
difficult
okay so one of
these starts moving
rapidly
and then
it rushes
basically and you
see it kind of
cross the path you
were following
moving from from
the tall grass uh
out and then it
goes there and
tries to be be
hidden but the
rest of you clearly
see that this like
this creature is not
high hidden it's
quick quick
things up
faint sight so it
doesn't know it's
been made
yeah or in
you're up next
all right what
hand signals did
bulgic do
all the way over
there
i very efficient
ones yeah very
efficient ones
move on
i'm gonna kill you
okay i have to
clarify
because orin's
about to try to
eat birds
okay well he
told you about
them he told
you where they
were it's fine
okay orin orin
will now cast
dinosaur form
there you go
okay and he is
going to turn
himself into a
tyrannosaurus rex
because he is now
level seven
excuse me that is
actually a king
king reptile
uh mister we
can do it can't
they trademarked t-rex
yeah i've had enough
of your pseudoscience
urndale that's a
fucking t-rex don't
come in
i've had enough of you
breaks your neck
all right i want to
see if this uh works
in just fine just
whoop yeah now i'm big
and now it does all
the cool spell i'm gonna
put myself here so
all big mclarge huge
oh the token thing
didn't transfer over as
it was trying to but
the thing failed
regardless orin is
now now big smidge
and so that that
takes that takes two
actions to do don't
worry i i was i was
gonna move after i
know um it takes two
actions to do and
just like legally i'll i
can't put myself on
it's okay i'll have him
squeak there
yeah and he wants to
look at the bird who
thinks he is uh hidden
okay and what i want
to do is intimidate i
want to make a loud
boisterous roar as a t-rex
and try to uh demoralize
that bird with an
intimidate check
oh okay all right let's
uh yeah give me an
intimidate check all right
it's only plus nine but i
want to try anyway so
also do i get a plus one
do the arendil stingamajigs
on this one or just
attacks uh yeah sure
somehow his tactics
apply to you turning
into a dinosaur and
intimidating these i don't
know how exactly that
works but i i'll allow
it the orange stamps
one of its giant feet
down and a large war
erupts as he tries to
intimidate and i roll the
two i want to hero point
it
which is the one
uh all right not as
good but it's 19 against
its wills will save
or will dc uh that
will that will be a
success awesome he is
not creatures now
frightened one and that
is the okay orange turn
okay okay cool uh allow
me to apply the uh
frightened condition i
could probably help i
got it i got it i got
it it's done see i know
what i'm doing all
right uh t-rex oran
shows up and the the
bird like backs up and
it begins working like
walk walk as it's like
feathers begin to pull
back as it sees this
t-rex in the jungle
that's where they're
supposed to be then
another one comes it
flies
straight to the southeast
like you see it like do
like these hopping jump
flies it's it's wings
barely able to keep it
aloft and then it just
lands right there and
that's all of its
movement volley you're
up you uh you see
this you see this
situation what are you
doing um oakly
doakly well this is a
an interesting situation
here um i'm i'm going
to try something a
little silly um because
we're we're kind of in
some some some dense
dense foliage yeah it's
a bit hard to get at
these aerial creatures
like they're all on
the ground they're not
flying this one sort of
jump aerial over at you
um but like there's you
know there's there's
there's certainly like
terrain like trees and
such to take advantage of
yeah absolutely okay no i
was gonna climb up orin
uh oh i mean absolutely
hell yeah yeah you
absolutely could i'd allow
it but if they are on the
ground that does just feel
unnecessary i i'm if if
voli i don't i apologize
if i didn't hear what
you just said i was
changing 50 things if you
want to hop on top of the
t-rex or we'll just let
you do it all right so
what we need now is
someone needs to take the
uh the movie poster for
tammy and the t-rex and
replace it with volley and
the t-rex get on that
please all right i'm gonna
top just now i've committed
to the bit yeah i'm going
to uh move over this
away to orin yeah for my
first action uh for my
second action i'm going to
deftly climb up his big
dinosaur back um give me an
acrobatics check this i will
allow i will no no no i want
her to make the acrobatics
check so she can get panache
from doing it exactly i'm glad
we're on the same page
thurston
i heard zorn being like
oh he doesn't have to make
a thing i'm like oh for
panache yes yes
i can't with a 33 yeah
there you go oh beautiful
beautiful yeah oh i'm
going huh yeah i'm gonna uh
tumble on top this one's a
super saiyan effect where she
does it so we always now just
don't like
yeah uh yeah and i'm going
to just aim my guns at the
frightened boy uh and i'm going
to take a shot okay i need to
see if this will work one
second okay okay i'm trying
something yeah i'm trying i'm
trying there we go there we go
okay sorry i'm just making sure
that there we go okay yeah you
may you may take your shot
okay i'm gonna i'm gonna make
sure this works
second boy so can and put her
height to five feet
yeah that's what i was actually
thinking yeah okay try that and
there we go
keep her on top there you go
oh boy
uh oakley doakley um let's see
the the martinet cardoza pistols
yep
yes indeed uh let's let's let's
fire
wow nice
oh okay there we go
big attack that'll crit do you
uh sure wish i could finish a
ranged shot but alas
uh so i click the critical
button
yep
yeah
oh two ones
oh wow
it's uh it's not great but hey
but you see your critical
critical effect
because you critted yeah oh yes
indeed
yeah it has to make a fortitude
save or dc 23 fortitude save or
be stunned one
oh no it it fails yeah
it's uh stunned it's now
demoralized and stunned and
i uh twirl the gun blow off the
smoke reach out for a high five
and realize i can't reach oran's
tiny little t-rex hands
oran tries to give you a high five
with the t-rex arms get sad and just
claps his own hands together
like kind of minus five five by
itself no friends
all right and that's the end of
my turn
rahua
yeah so rahua's gonna don't
worry rahua's fucking
what
he's got this don't worry about
it
we're just gonna look at that
in there
gonna
gonna do something real nice
gonna cook it
oh of course
oh of course
we're gonna cast an arctic barrage
and we're gonna cast it
hiding
what the fuck
isn't that a cantrip
it is
yeah it's always auto
hiding
yeah it's always auto
we love it we love to see
yeah cantrips to pathos
take ignition are always auto
yeah
all right do it
oh that's that's the damage
dice we're gonna ignore that
we're gonna we're gonna do the
attack
here we go
yeah attack real kid
look
a little miss by two sadly
you do have a hearing point
though
if you know
just saying you know
that's true
he's tempting you
yeah
he just wants you to not have
anything to save you with
yeah exactly
you're happy
i'm going to leave
okay good
good
very good
just walks
like walks past tashi
okay cool
no fuck off
i'm mad
like rahua's like
well i did all i can do
and then leaves
rahua you are made of wood
tashti is made of dirt
the tree must protect the dirt
no
do your job
no i will not protect tashti
pick turn
will
will
defiantly advance
oh no
prepping the bagpipes
pick turn tank
play us out
pick turn tank
yeah
he needs to
and there
inspires
uh
inspires courage
on all of you
there you go
you're all inspired
with courage
good job pick turn
as the bagpipes
start playing
and you
you remember yourselves
in these swampy moors
uh from before
the first time
you met pick turn
all right
however one of them
moves up
then charges
at pick turn
who stands there
um and makes a strike
with his beak
oh
oh no
oh no
one that turns
into a
yeah uh
hits
hits pick turn
um
for
uh
dimaggio
and
and then
2d6
persistent bleed
damage
two
as pick turn
is now
bleeding
uh
from this
savage beak
that comes
and he
is
this raptor
creature
comes out
and begins
tearing at
pick turn
splush
as he
continues
playing the
bagpipes
never relenting
on his
musical notes
um
and then
another one
comes
uh
comes
a flying
over here
to the
northwest
uh
Toshti
backs the
F off
and like
looks around
not doing
anything else
Baldrick
you're up
excellent
it is time
for me
to kill
you in
half
with my
death
weapons
Thurston
all right
Baldrick
all right
I target
this bird
and I'm
going to
assail it
with grenades
I still
have
my
fucking
fire
oh
hang on
a sec
we rested
I didn't
prepare
my fucking
shit ahead
of time
damn you
it's fine
dang it
it's fine
I'll just
quick prepare
them
it does not
matter
uh
remember
too
now
you can
um
you have
perpetual
infusions
so you
can always
like
I think
there's
yeah
I can
always
have
lessers
lesser ones
yeah
yeah
no
I'm just
saying
if you
run out
you still
got
something
no
I'm not
going to
do that
that's
not
even
remotely
worth
my
time
okay
not
right
now
anyway
because
right
now
what I
need
to do
is
I need
a quick
alchemy
together
a moderate
alchemist
fire
okay
so I'm
gonna do
that
right
now
okay
beginning
right this
second
he's got
it
he's
on the
way
that
moderate
alchemist
fire
is coming
man
I've
added
the
alchemist
fire
to
my
equipment
wow
very
good
now
you
are
going
to
bomb
be
the
bomber
who
bombs
yes
uh
I'm
gonna
throw
my
grenade
at him
using
my
attack
of
death
okay
it's
this
one
here
flat
footed
against
me
since
I'm
ambushing
yeah
I've
got
him
I've
got
this
one
this
one
flat
footed
right
throwing
a
bomb
that
will
definitely
hit it
and
good
thing
I
had
all
that
shit
oh
okay
you're
all in
the
damage
unimpressive
ooh
yeah
so
we'll
be
boom
oh
wow
okay
so that
and
then
the
splash
and
then
the
persistent
fire
okay
it
is
looking
incredibly
beat up
by all
of that
since we
are now
in the
midst of
combat
I am
going to
make my
nature check
to assess
its life
sure
where possible
oh
what does
the 16
get me
Jimbo
uh
lets you
know
what these
things are
they are
ochre
pharaoh
raptors
they are
beings of
the solitude
commonly known
as rust
chickens
um
you can
tell that
your
your
effect
reduced
it
to
just
uh
just
about a
third of
its health
from just
one bomb
there
um
and you
can ask
me
one question
about this
thing
uh
do they
take any
bonus damage
from any
element
uh
not from
any element
um
though they're
uh
though they are
particularly weak
uh
and susceptible
to mental
effects
that's about
the only
weakness
they have
give it a
second
chat
ba-dump
all right
and that is
baldrick
all right
now i'm gonna
have this
this raptor
okay
first of all
what it's gonna
do is it's
gonna
it's gonna
preen
it's preening
yeah it's
it starts
it starts uh
it starts preening
except to how
shit it can't
really so never
mind it's gonna
it's gonna like
get ready to
preen and then
it just like
moves up to
you
preens and
like its
plumage starts
like fluttering
about all of
this uh
volley and
or in reaction
oh oh shit
what's your reaction
prepared and
we'll see if it
doesn't even
work sorry
chick
what's your
reaction
oh okay
pop out my
character sheet
again my
reaction's a
spell
that's the first
spell i put in
i kind of went
well you
you do it
in our
preference
as a t-rex
and uh
all right i am a
t-rex and i am
probably more if it
does go for the
thing i keep i
can't having to
look that up
multiple times
that's right
can he cast
spells or
probably more i
think eventually
you can have to
double check
oh never mind i
don't have i
don't have a
reaction
thank you for
reminding me because
i constantly forget
that polymorph and
casting there's a
way to do it but
it's you know
now it's going now
it's going to do
its uh very
distracting plumage
by preening so
both you and
volley i require
will saves
oh dear how
many actions is
preening
uh just one so
it moves preens and
it's got one left
after this it's
stunned uh yeah
so it won't so
that'll that'll be
the end of its
actions you're
right it is
stunned oh
yes uh and
you know it moves
in preens then
will saves yeah
have inspire courage
you got a natural
20 and i got a
one
yes
yes
oh no
so volley's on
the back of
zor like the t-rex
feeling like i'm
on the back of a
fucking t-rex and
i just like shot
that thing between
the eyes of my
pistol everything's
great this fucking
like bird shakes
its head steps
forward and like
begins preening in
front of this
fucking t-rex um
and like its plumage
is just like like
it it it it just
unfurls and at the
same exact moment
the sun briefly
briefly comes out
and blasts off of
these these rusty
metallic feathers
um and um so you
fail to save so
that means uh
oran you are now
blind for uh for
one round
you know i'm just
freaking out trying to
grab my eyes but i
can't reach them
no that's right
that's right
um oh wow and if
you click on your
token it wow that's
cool um okay so
yeah if i got my
token i uh well i
have i put shared
vision on yeah
yeah yeah yeah
strain but in in
foundry if you were
playing without all
the stuff we're doing
chat uh it would
just turn off vision
for your character
and you'd only get
like sound tokens
for everything yeah
you get like echo
location tokens for
what's in your body
anyways um so yeah
okay so that happens
now now on top of
everything zoran yeah
that was a natural
one and i have to
complicate and i can't
rewrote ones and you
too can make me suffer
when you're on the
patreon.com force last
narrative declaration and
send your own
complication
patreon.com forward slash
discord forward slash
twitter slash simple
flips you know plug
plug plug
hmm let me let me
find a good save
as you're looking for
one here yeah yeah
i'll explain what
blinded does so chat
yeah please blinded
condition does uh i'll
read the condition for
you you can't see
obviously all normal
terrain is difficult
terrain to use so
moving at uh half
speed uh you can't
detect anything using
vision uh you
automatically critically
fail perception checks
that require you to
be able to see and
if vision is your
only precise sense you
take a minus four
status penalty to
perception checks i'm
immune to visual
effects and blinded
over rise dazzled now
you might ask
yourself hey if
you're blinded can
you still melee you
can but it's at but
i have to roll a dc
and if i roll i think
if i roll i think on
a let like one to
eleven i i can't hit
but twelve after i
can i think i've got
one i'm gonna use
here it's called
break and as part of
your action you step
on a stray object and
catapult it straight
into your face so as
you are blinded by the
majestic bloomage of
this creature you step
back and a rock like
comes under your immense
dino tread and flies up
into your face um giving
you the dazed condition
oh no wow it's pretty
cool cool just like
dazzle dazzle we'll go
with dazzle there we go
boop okay dazzled as you
are now you know blinded
and dazzled and all sorts
of bad you don't want to
put me permanently
flat-footed as well i'm
also yeah there we go
yeah because everything is
hidden to me because now
that i'm blinded so i am
constantly flat-footed and
as i'm looking up it i
have to make a dc 11
flat check to attack
anything and now it's
your it's your go orin
yeah so everything sucks
uh i'm aware the birds in
front of me though so
also that was laser beast
band for that uh that
complication cool yeah
does blind overtake dazzle
it does uh so dazzle
doesn't do anything to me
try to dazzle me it had
days so you know what
we'll make it we'll make
it something more
appropriate because days
doesn't actually exist in
this game you know what
i know what we'll give
we'll we'll not use
dazzle you're right
dazzle is overtaken we'll
give you a stunned one
condition too oh that's
worse that lowers my
action there you go there
you go thanks chat you got
my back
all right that goes away
after my blind condition
goes that's my that's my
that's my counter yeah no
stunned goes away after
the round it happens so
yeah you just this round
there you go yeah uh go
fuck yourselves so two
two action blind t-rex all
right now that we've
started that out now what
happens yeah what happens
is that oren's gonna try
to bite this bird there's a
giant jaws like he kind of
knew where his last
location was and he's like
he tries to does it make a
big hunk out of a makes a
loud roar and he tries to
bite into it uh first i'm
gonna roll my flat check
yep i roll a natural 20 on
my flat check so i'm good
glad i'm glad you got that
out of the way early yeah
and now we're gonna try to
bite it and yeah actually
it's right in condition
this guy wait really confused
like
but i have a plus 17 on the
thing but it all said i
couldn't i'm trained but
first i'm very confused
when i try to roll it it
says have dinosaur form i
have strength oh it
probably turned that off
because i do i'll just
leave it there it's plus
17 to hit uh that is
going to be a 27 and i do
hit it that will hit it
yeah give me damage
awesome and the damage
rolls only 1d12 but i
rolled max damage with a
plus 10 because i'm a
giant t-rex that is 22
points of damage to it
damn chicken it begins
whimpering come on down
to the rugged top and come
and die with me i want to
try to get it again and
try to bite it one more
time with my last action
because i am stunned so
i'm gonna get the other
one okay i'm gonna roll my
flat check hope to gosh i
get it i got a 12 i'm in
the good i'm now going to
try to bite it and mp
minus five so crunch
that is 11 plus you'll
hit that i got a 23 in
it i'm going to do my
damage and 10 damage
died 20 damage total
because i'm a t-rex i
eat this thing i grab onto
it like a dog and then i
throw it off to the side
and he releases another
loud roar out of triumph
and say you can't stop
me that's that's that's
that's what you do yes
okay volley can you give
me a reflex save
i'll allow it i'll allow
it i'll allow it
uh 23 that's good you
managed to hold on yeah
for dear life
oren oren we're getting
excited
what where where are you
as your your mouth just
goes brawl what's on my
back
all right that's the end of
oren's turn there oh my god
uh okay volley you're out
all right uh no no not volley
no never mind i have a i have a
raptor that is going to charge
at tree boy treeman sorry
sorry sorry rahua treeman
he was ready for this he's
getting beaked beaked you
don't need more than an
hoker pharaoh raptor to stop
rahua treeman oh that's a
19 oh it's a 31 total yeah for
for nine damage i can't take
nine damage i'll die why why
why why why why ochre pharaoh
raptor did you you should you
should not have taken five
damage rahua should have
taken the damage there we go
total damage did rahua take
nine damage but that's not
all because it was part of a
tearing charge he also takes
some bleed damage five five
persistent bleed and then and
then he will after that will
attempt to hit you with a talon
uh with the multiple attack
penalty and misses critical
misses in fact oh that's not
and that is that is the
pharaoh now we are volley on
the dinosaur okie dokie yes uh
well let's see here um i gotta
help my buddy pick turn over
there uh he seems to be getting a
little fucked up i see it's
bleeding and has a death chicken in
front of him yeah um so hmm how
far can i leap here how far can i get
in one action if i jump off of oren's
head
he doesn't just shoot i can shoot i
just do more damage if i stab it are
you uh are you immediately going
against baldrick's recommendation that
you not engage in melee listen it's
about the style yeah and you are one
extremely painful critical hit away of
not having this character anymore
what is more style or style than being
on a t-rex you can just keep doing
backflips on that is true all right
all right fine
might i might i make a suggestion
no i will fire my gun no fuck that
that's boring
okay hey hey hey hey hey
i'm just gonna say i think you will
find you have you have the the sky um
you have the sky pirate dedication which
has the from above action yeah that's
the thing i i don't know if i can reach
this bird from here though like can i
can i long jump 30 feet i mean you just
have to like land there
what's your regular move you tumble oh
yeah my my my regular move with panache
is 45 feet yeah like you can tumble
through like like jumping tumbling this
way or this way good lord yeah okay yeah
fuck it for style yeah and you don't eat
like yeah he's like yeah you're fucking
good like you can just make your check
all right uh well i've already got panache
panache but
panch
panch uh yeah so for from above i haven't
used this in a while i haven't had
verticality for a while
uh basically you're gonna roll but you
get an extra uh damage dice if you hit
oh yes yes
uh so am i just uh just roll it normally
and then we'll add get you to roll after
here yeah
all right because it's a rock grind
specific thing so it's not built into a
foundry yet
geiku foundry
uh oh check my finisher box
check that finisher and here we go
i'm gonna finish him
that's a hit
that is a hit
that's
uh you will hit
all right
oh 25 and then give me an extra d6 with
that too oh yes
from above
nice
four
four okay cool
uh yeah so you uh like do this massive
blow to this thing which causes it to like
work out
why did he take that much damage
uh took 54 damage no um
54 damage um but i will i will correct that
uh i should have taken 29 but you i was about to get excited
um no but it's it's pretty hurt it's pretty hurt
all right that was two actions
uh for a third i'm going to attempt to uh because i just used my panache
uh i'm going to attempt to faint this thing
okay my cat is on the desk oh no
oh yeah
oh yeah
yeah cat is just
cat is here cat is blocking chat
okay
oh no
good kitty
all right
good kitty
uh 24 on the faint
that will faint it
all right
panache is back baby
panache is back jamie is walking
and he's running away
um
all right
that's vali's turn
you are up
that's me
yep
uh we are you have one of the death chickens in front of you
i do i'm going to beat it to death
how does it feel writing these creatures and then beating them to death
oh it feels wonderful i wonder if god feels this when he fucking torches me on end
yes
yeah yeah probably
yeah damn wow how's that how's that 19
with the critical there's that critical hit with with your
were you you're using the mace okay i am
the mace whack it
okay did you roll in total it looks like a 35
i don't 35
nice
that will be a critical hit
that's a lot of points
yeah
because it was 10 over it's ac
yeah
wow
wow
all right you do uh 14 points of damage with that
hell yeah
it's not looking very good that was your first action what's your next action
i'm going to hit it again
okay
fuck bro think about the milfs don't
what
are you calling the burn a milf
no
i'm saying think about them
all right i'm thinking about them
this is apropos of nothing simply think about it
that will that will hit roll roll regular dimashio please
here's the moj six damage
okay he'll take six and you'll balk it with with mace
oh then you have one action left
i'm gonna hit him again
minus eight
wow this is fun mr mosby says beating a baby with a hammer
i'm just appreciating auto mod
do you wish you allow the term milf
zoran you better allow that i had to close the stream
that will hit 25 that will hit
narrative declaration used ad permitted term milf
very good
this is what happens when you think about the milfs
fucking christ all right
uh you have domed this thing three times and it is looking pretty beat up uh
rehu uh
but i have not hit enough times to cook it but i will keep trying
oh and then you will then you will take seven points of bleeding the damage and then you may roll the recovery check please
i will
that's
you will not recover
you will be bleeding more
no
all right
the on fire one is now rushing towards you baldrick
stop typing milfs we can't allow every single permutation of the fucking word
no we have to we need to
they're all getting filtered out
like so much i can't even see
but i'm saying am i like
allow
zoran this this chat room must be milf friendly
erin do we just like
rips off his armor he's wearing i love milf shirts
i'm hearing him smack his chest like he's hitting like that fucking sonic the hedgehog bubble noise
i love milfs and milfs love me
i'm gonna miss you baldrick and then i'm gonna ask you then after it charges you and misses you
the bird that you have on fire and have bombed uh is then going to try to preen at you please give me a will save
he's distracted by baldrick's milf hunter shirt
yeah this is the milf hunter moment
rolling
i'll give you a 32
you are unimpressed by this flaming
yeah i'm unimpressed because i'm thinking of the milfs so
i gotta get out of here
i'm just gonna end this bird's turn i'm gonna take five
good night chat good night
stop
let me roll this for coverage
stop talking
i'm gonna take that damage that's cool then i'm gonna
man i love fire bombs
correct
man i love feral raptors
yeah you want to know why he failed to turn off the persistent fire damage
i don't want to know
why
this is because he's a bird
oh yeah
yeah
yeah
um
pick turn's gonna continue um
i like how that killed the motivation
continue
he's a bird we all just calm down like yeah man true
pick turn's gonna uh keep playing the bagpipes and
while doing so stab out with his short sword towards the one by you volley
pick turn
get his ass
yeah
think about them
here we go
he will hit
yeah there you go
yeah
pick turn
pick turn is like playing the bagpipes with one arm and then like
takes the the the the short sword and stabs it
oh
seven milky melody of motivation
boom
bam stabs it and then you know
um
continues uh
actually uh continues to uh play
the bagpipes so you are all continued to be the inspired
very good
uh and that is pick turn squeal
and that will bring us to some some raptors
um
oops
oh and sorry and then pick turn of course bleeds a lot
oh he's bleeding
to the picture picture and bleeds
bleed him to death now
and he's still bleeding
in fact he critically fails but it's a flat roll so i don't know why it says that
but but he's critically
um
and it's fail
but but since volley uh is like clearly the main threat here the raptor is going to
start uh slashing at you volley so
first of all it's going to beak you
volley you need to think about them
um that would be
oh i'm never not thinking about milves
milves
milves with a v-e-s
that's just that no no no that's not plural that's just what an elf milf is
fucking now we're talking now we're cooking
let him cook
i'm sorry thurston this is
we can't we can't undo it
i critically missed with the third attack
and you want to know why he failed
yeah there we go
yeah
yeah
yeah
look the milfs have given a
milves have given a lot of
you fuckers know i'm gonna add in milves somewhere into this setting
like god you say that like it's a bad thing
you better
listen thurston we could just add them to the port city it's fine
it's true that's true
have you heard the high mil
the high council of milves will decide your fate
fucking fucking roll your opportune riposte
this episode's title is going to be milfs
no no no you should when you when this goes up on youtube just title it think of them
oh you hit please roll damage
i love how we're joking so much
this person's just playing the game and we forgot about it
we're just concentrating
yeah because we're winning because we're thinking of the milves
for the show let's calm down
no it's fine calm down
this bit is curing my reflux i'm continuing it
all right i stabbed the bird for 11 points of damage
i don't even know what's going on anymore
let's let's
that's because
that's because she is
10 minutes behind she is not thinking of the milves shaking her head
their head
okay look there are a lot of birds
one bird is pecking it
one bird is pecking at volley and pick turn
um and is near death
one bird has just come into assistant pecking volley
baldrick has set one on fire
and is being pecked by it
and then
same context
like
you
he said
pecking
pecking
not with two g's
a c and a k
different
i
get it right
i need to lie down
i gotta lie down
as long as we're doing what my friend group does
it keeps looking at each other it keeps going peggers dude and then it's a whole
peggers dude
i have a spear next to my desk i'm throwing it to texas
the high quality
rapidly approaching the narrative declaration
thank you everyone
good night
i'm just eating like some pretzels chips now i'm just kind of like yep here we go baldrick you're
shut up
can i
whoo
whoo
all right uh so what i'm gonna do is i'm going to destroy this man i'm going to target him
i'm going to quick alchemy another bomb and i'm going to throw it
okay
use a grenade
rip to anybody listening to this
i know people listen to this with like groups of friends whatever on their tv and sometimes
ah there we go
this one you see zoran this only happened because you brought up pegging
all right hit me with the critical miss i'm applying your header in order of conditionals
to mils please i'm i'm not implying a little attacked i'm not applying shit you were throwing
it at the one in front of you right correct okay so you're gonna take four points of splash
damage that's fine hit me and so will it
i love the musical sting that came with that
man i love fishing
um
you have destroyed our chain of power
zora
you combo broke us
yeah wow
um
one sec what have you done
uh i need to i need to find a good good good ranged combat
what
is this even range this is like melee
so as as you're looking for um
of course i'll explain kind of like how alchemist bombs work for people as you're looking for
application uh so if you're an alchemist and you and you generally miss with an alchemical
bomb it's still a range attack you can do it very close
but uh and there's not really a penalty of doing so if you miss you still do the splash damage
always remember that if you're an alchemist and you're throwing bombs you still do the splash damage
for it you just won't directly do the direct damage on it so but if he critically misses
critically missing with alco bombs is bad
really really bad
uh correct
i have to double check on the rules but generally i think you hurt yourself or something
i have to have to well he's up close so yeah he doesn't get to exclude like he normally would
himself um okay i i'm not gonna pick this one but i i really like this complication because i'm just thinking of it in the context of this scene
it's just entitled oh great they have guns now
and then the birds pull out a fucking
the bird with a fucking blicky
bang bang bang
the chicky with the blicky
um
hmm
oh
to tell stories just uploaded something to the chat called milfs.png
no
don't mind if i click on that
there you go there you go chat
there you go
there you go
now you have piqued my interest
there you go
that's how the overlay is but yeah there you go
uh
for those of you listening yeah
you gotta go to youtube for this one i'm sorry podcast
we're not we're not we're not spoiling it you gotta figure it out
yeah
yeah figure this one out yeah
okay um
okay so i i'm
i'm just i'm just gonna go
with um
random bullshit go from my name jurors
uh frustrated at your last miss you spend your next action
doing the exact same thing and throwing another bomb in frustration
okay i'll roll to hit
wait hang on i don't have one prepared so can i just quickly like i i'm so mad
i fucking pizza tower create one very quickly and throw it
yes okay i'll take a map minus five then
good pizza
all right hang on we need to focus
milfs
yes
that's fine you'll hit her you will find the milf hunter within you
i annihilate the shit out of it with 22 damage
now you're thinking with milfs
kablooey
it's really fucking close to death it like looks awful
um
you have an action left my friend
do i no i don't because i oh because you know me and then throw
nope yeah technically i took four so
that's fair all right
well that one's dead um all right we're we're back to
you are you are no longer stunned and you are no longer blind
oh hello b are you snacking
yep i hear it please don't
good
don't smack
i will put my foot down do not smack at the microphone please
that would piss people off bad
please don't it's your it's your guy just sank her claws into my leg
i'm no longer thank god i'm gonna take that off
all right i see i see two burbs i see two burbs over there
the oren is no longer blinded he's now ready to go
finally able to do what his dino dreams are capable of by dying from a comet so he is going
to move oh all the way over this way i think i have a ring 30 feet let me see
uh 30 feet i know i do yep 30 feet boop oh you can move 30 feet i thought that was your
range for attack yeah my my i've become a long long-nosed dog thing but it's a tyrenosaurus
right
oh god i wish i knew the quote from that
i have i have some friends who would like do the car voice from jimmy neutron
he's like jimmy and then just say horrible horrible things
i can't say hey jimmy you want to see a picture of a milf
jimmy do you want to see the milfs i want to see your mom jimmy
i'll kill you can we can we finish the combat
people were really real asian who was clearly following me and tracking me on the internet
let me tell you about jimmy neutron and milfs
my life is in danger
god damn it
make me attack zoran
oh it's okay it's gonna be a short combat don't worry
uh all right we're not getting through this live not in reality we're fine in game
okay you want to hit him i yes you can take the flat footed off the bird it automatically does it
um that and i will not be hitting him flat-footed the one in the middle between pick turn and volley
there and you don't have to do it you can do it if it's a special thing uh i'm gonna basically i
won't get the flat-footed bonus because i can't quite get in between them but i will um i'm gonna
try to bite this bird that's in between volley and pick turn here and with a big old jaw attack
get a plus 17 on the roll and that is critical not that is a crit because it will be 10 over his
ac with a 31 and so i will do critical damage with it it'll be 2d12 i rolled a one and a nine on
the die with for a total with all the crit damage of the plus of being tyrannosaurus rex and it's
deadly i have deadly trait on the draws as well that is 31 points of damage well thank you for
telling us how many hit points they have on called gm on called gm fine
if that thing is dead as i crunch into it just uh i just just let go
it takes three points of damage and dies
i bite it in half and you'd hear as he does so and just go and then he turns to the other one for
his last and final action with the ma with multi-attack penalty minus five he'll attack the other one that
is behind volley and that is that would be a miss if i still have i have a hero point thanks to the chat
let me re-roll that let me minus me here a point so i don't miss let's get you another hit there you
go thank you for yes you shut up no boring i hate you no no okay we just got back on track
i don't even want to hear it urndale you started this train we were having a good time
milfs are universal vore is not with his 1d12 plus 10 he does 15 points of damage to the other one
behind volley that's the end of voren's turn now i detest this i'm gonna i'm gonna have this uh this
this arrow raptor up here just to go go into going to ruhu a bit with a beak yeah are you okay
i'm gonna hit him just just barely very good and i'll do 13 points of damage that's pretty cool
yeah nice nice i'm just waiting for the next thing just talon miss talon
miss cool good job good good job little buddy for context it tried to hit the 14 and then it
missed again with the mp minus eight on it yeah with rolling at 18 on the dice so it's it's
we're trying to catch up time that we've lost volley you're out once more for
podcast people they want to know what the roles are they don't need the valley
all right i'm gonna i'm gonna uh wait do i have panache i see my yeah because you
deceptioned it last turn and then it died so like you were getting ready for the most
cool badass kill and then this t-rex came and kill stole from you but you still have panache
all right i'm gonna whip around and uh stab this bird with a finisher okay do it finish this
that's a critical hit oh yeah that works all right roll me uh about a billion dice please are you ready
for all the d6s yeah wait what that was that was not many that was not very many critical you need
to click critical did you oh and i have my finisher button checked i just didn't roll them you still
did 31 damage yeah yeah i see it's just just multiplying that's why okay uh wow and then it's
flat-footed so that's a thing um did it do the deadly it did wait yeah it did okay uh yeah ooh that's
that's that's no good you know it's still alive though oh it's still alive did it do the finisher
damage i'm checking so this is the checkmark thing i've i've yeah update i noticed it hasn't done it
i yeah i guess not yeah i have to i have to reapply it on your character i'll see if i can try to fix
because with the updates and stuff it used to work in the past but now something's broken it
just manually doing family out of the doors for now weird yeah all right uh my finisher is a three
extra d6 if i recall correctly uh so i think you were doing a con which one which finisher were you
using confident what confident confident um yeah i think so gosh because i have to double check the
the the the the the book well yeah uh i'll help out probably yeah sure you it's gonna kill it spoiler
alert you deal half your precise damage strike to the tart or let's see uh you make a strike with a
weapon or an unarmed attack that would apply your damage the failure effects uh failure you don't have
a precise strike damage to the target this damage type is at the printer uh it's under precise strike
my bad that's that's where it is so it's 2d6 um and then you are fifth level so yeah 3d6 so
add 60 well 3d6 times two technically yeah or no yeah yeah uh 11 and 22. yeah uh which will which will yeah
bleh as you stab it perfectly through its head murdering it
god that is that is my first action uh for my second action now that i'm panache-less
i'm gonna move uh is this like a big obstacle in the way like a big tree yeah yeah there'd be some
difficult there you kind of need that like you could like double move basically through these two
like to so this would be like 10 feet to move through and this would be 10 feet yeah um in that
case i will just go ahead and double move to get a flank on that fucking verb yeah do it
that's my turn all right all right
can you do it rahua can you let's find out can you just do it again do who uh
hey check how hard i can smack this chicken i like how we had this contrast of animal cruelty before
no no no zoran this is nature that's normal boiling a chicken in a pot alive is cruelty
well we just got a bunch of chickens for dinner yeah but it's also let's predator prey relationships
you're gonna wake up in the morning and you're gonna be sick
okay what did you roll on stuff i rolled the 23 to hit which hit and i rolled six damage so suffice
to say because the creature is still existing in front of me i'm going to have to attack it again
yeah wow wow uh i'm going to actually use my final two actions to use anarchic barrage
oh man kinetic cooking is so cringe it takes so long to hit them
i missed fuck you have a hero point i'm gonna i like how urndill finally she's like i want this
over use the hero points we are seven minutes away from the the logical end point oh no it's worse
don't worry i missed worse the chicken yeah fuck good old 18.
oh and then yeah please click the recovery because you're still bleeding
not anymore oh you recovered yay but you will take bleed um no i don't
what what you just decided not to oh okay cool um the other one will begin like savagely uh tearing
into you baldrick great it will attempt to attack you it will miss with a nat one then it will
that is follow up with another miss and then for its next action it will fly away to this way
and start running away from you while on fire no no no no that's fine i don't care
what the fuck what
oh the fire goes out as it runs away but it will take two damage
as it like flaps swings in like picture and sort of pulls back continues playing the pipes
um to inspire all of you so we can hopefully have you end these poor like raptors
i really love that we are not having picture attack because of meta issues
that's very funny to me just just just yep here we go i'll do that it's very funny picture and is
still very bleeding i like how my leg went away when the spire courage went down because big turn made
his leg wow like uh baldrick you're up okay what i'm gonna do i'm going to ignore that thing okay
and i'm going to move closer give me a reflex save right uh right there flexing reflex reflex please
oh i'll give you a 31. you avoid something but you look down briefly as you're running and in the
the square you've just entered you see that there is a face down corpse in the swamp oh nice loot
thanks baldrick wait that's whose thoughts we've been hearing there was a there was just a ghost
lingering around whispering elves that's what it was it's arndale laying face down in the swamp
to me after you get me all right i'm not surviving quick make a grenade no no this is not where you
use the lore emote chat no no no no i write good lore it's fine don't worry we've got a supplement
the main hope that we'll stop combat here soon you hit i hit let me do damage it's put it's piddly
it's 12. so what you rolled you you rolled a 31 your reflex save really 25 to hit and you yes damage
with four flash yes uh it's also on fire okay okay okay you know what thurston yep if uh what
potty's are filing makes that orc license and other stuff if milfs aren't allowed we're not signing it
we're not part of that i'm getting started i'm gonna get started on the lore for that right after
a couple other things that i'm gonna be writing up yeah the ancestry milf splat book we have garlic
mancer why can't we have milf as a class yeah because we're not fatal that's why fatal would not
be so we're talking about corruption of champions we're okay it'll be okay are you done here are you are
we thirsty are you done there baldrick yeah get lost get started okay t-rex oran
you want you want to end the combat or do you want to prolong it because you have two you have two
paths i don't go after that literally literally literally a zoran was just like i can't let this
fleeing one live i'm going after the one that's that's just running away and he's like
go go go prolonging the combat i don't want to kill steal it's their kill anyway oran chases this one
down and proceeds to make big crunch i like to imagine like this this bird just got off a little
bit sees the water and and it's like it's kind of calm and the bird kind of takes the wing and go
woo and then it hears the water reflection the reflection and it hears just a roar behind as the
jaws come to clamp on this bird i roll the two but i have one last hero point oh you are unbelievable
and i crit with it you are unbelievable i'm out of hero points i'm out of hero points hold on you are
an unbelievable and absurd human being
it's 11 6 on the die and with the plus everything and deadly i got a total of 46 damage do i eat it
you know if zoran didn't ban me this is where i would have some more pretzel chips and loudly do them in
because that's what happens to this thing it's it's so dead okay it takes 10 points of damage
because oh okay my actions move up twice and then and then eat it yeah that weird reaction because
we're in a survival situation i've eaten multiple birds so i have to eat rations after this
we could just get rations from them no yeah i already got the rations from them just making
sure okay i already ate my rations for the day all right well turns done erndel erndel takes the
the camera away from the lackey to film filming all this for a moment hey hey hey narrative
declaration artist anyone who we're currently paying for who just wants to make art for free
petition to make a ztb cruelty emote
sure you can make it like zoran in the cruelty squad guy armor do it in the put him in fanart and i
will pick one out of a ball if people do my it's become it's become a recurrence
an amusing one but a recurrence nonetheless but what what are the things rolling chet or
i i was rolling them yeah it attempted to peck at rahua three times and failed um critically missed
three times volley please please oh boy i'm gonna stab this or no i'm gonna faint first and then i'm
gonna stab this are you have panache don't you have panache uh i shouldn't oh that's right yeah
i finish her yeah yeah okay yeah you're right you're right you're right you're right you're right
it just says yeah i'm just further beyond man yeah what do you want from me
all right please please uh do your do your do your magic here yeah i'm gonna faint
uh and yeah 21 um that is actually good enough because it's will is terrible remember oh wow this
is in fact an ambinal still on fire in fact please please please please please please attack
i'll do my level best uh checking the finisher button i'm striking this thing there we go i crit it sure
we need that crit as you know making sure finisher is checked it won't work remember oh no yeah
no it didn't roll roll uh 66 more 66 yeah you mean 3d6 well 66 and we'll we'll
fucking use that instead of three times two whatever fucking what one of the two options
there you go roll oh yeah there we go 50 points of damage cool it only it only had nine left you kill
it yay very true this episode is about milfs and cruelty you are correct about that stop
one sec since i just assumed none of you are going to heal picture and i'm just going to see
if you recover from his bleeding i'm gonna help
no he doesn't one sec i'm just gonna go to the next combat
one of my vampire players will unironically kill me if i let him die here
he's gonna see how many rounds
the episode is over the episode is over everyone have a good time goodbye
they're bleeding out one sec let's take a picture can picture and can picture
no the episode is over the episode is over the episode is over he's already dead
he took six more again he recovers
he had he had uh 10 hit points left but pictern's alive everybody thanks for coming this week
i'm playing the music right now we love you the music is playing the credits are going goodbye
bye everyone we'll see you next time