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In this episode of 'Fuck Fear with Christine Spratley', Christine shares a humorous driving story and reflects on her past friendships. She introduces the concept of 'planting your own garden', inspired by a poem, to cultivate self-responsibility and self-accountability. Christine emphasizes the importance of creating moments of joy, humor, and confidence through daily interactions, music playlists, and simple acts of connection. Join her as she challenges listeners to plant their own gardens and decorate their souls instead of waiting for life to hand them happiness.
00:00 Introduction and Welcome
00:51 A Driving Anecdote
04:06 Today's Topic: Pantry Items and Speed Bumps
07:08 The Poem 'After a While'
09:54 Planting Your Own Garden
12:01 Techniques for Joy and Confidence
14:28 Humor and Human Connection
18:18 The Power of Small Gestures
29:10 Broadcasting Positivity
33:21 Final Thoughts and Challenge
Creators and Guests
What is F*ck Fear with Christine Spratley: Living Like a Head Bitch In Charge ?
This podcast is for anyone who wants to live like an HBIC—or lives with, works with, marries, dates, or is raising one. Let’s be real: being a Head Bitch in Charge is messy, bold, and unapologetically badass. This is not a guidebook—it’s a pantry.
My guests and I will share the ingredients that we use—what’s worked and what’s failed—as we say “fuck fear” and take action to live a fulfilled life. We cover real-life hacks and deep philosophical pillars to navigate the chaos of everyday life—where some days, my only accomplishment is having a bra on and my teeth brushed.
We’re tackling the daily shit women navigate, from workplace politics to relationships, raising kids, and building careers, all with humor, audacity, and zero filters.
So, tune in—tell your friends, and even your enemies. This isn’t about aging with grace—it’s about aging with mischief, audacity, and a damn good story to tell.
11 F Fear
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[00:00:00] Hello ladies. Hello gentlemen. And everyone. This is fuck Fear with Christine Spratley, living like an HBIC. And this is gonna be a short and sweet one today. But, um, before we start. I, I think I'm, I'm Joe, I gotta tell you, and, and ladies and gentlemen, bear with me, but I gotta tell you, Joe, my, my drive over, um, and [00:01:00] you know me, I'm, I'm usually running late, um, which is something new for me.
Christine Spratley: Um, and I'm, I'm, so, I'm barreling down and falls of nurse For any of you that don't know Raleigh, there's a, there's a drive, there's a road called Falls of Noose. Mm-hmm . And I take it and I take it to four 40. And, um, from north Raleigh and down into four, four onto four 40. And it's very narrow. Have you ever driven it?
Joe: Yeah.
Christine Spratley: And, and it's not made for the SUVs of today or the excursions of the today or the big jacked up pickup trucks of today. And I drive a Hyundai Genesis, which is not a small, small car. Um, so I'm in the middle lane, and of course I'm late, so I'm barreling down and . Um, and I'm, I'm, I, I look, I mean, I'm always watching ahead because I'm thinking I'm gonna have to maneuver 'cause I'm not gonna slow down.
I'm just gonna maneuver around. So, I noticed that this SUV mid-size SUV is on my left. This big jacked up truck is on my right, but he's, [00:02:00] you know, moving along just fine. And this SUV on my left is a little slow and. It starts kind of coming in my lane, but it's not coming in my lane. So I don't, you know, so I'm like, Hey, are you gonna, what, what you gonna do?
And sure enough, I'm like, by the time I'm like, Hey, they're coming in my lane. I don't think they know that I'm in here. And, and I was pretty much almost into their blind spot, but by the time they started doing it, they were in, I was in their blind spot and I was like, Hey, motherfucker . So I lay on the horn and I'm not mad 'cause I've had enough time to know that, kind of be on the lookout of this.
But this is the fun part. So. Of course they rear back over to the left. And, and, and I always do this when I, when I pass somebody who is either driving slow or whatever I've had a mental interaction with. And um, and I don't, I don't pass them and look at 'em to flip 'em off or anything 'cause you can't do that nowadays 'cause, 'cause you get shot or something.
But usually it's like, oh, like this morning I was driving, there was an old guy, like an old, older guy. [00:03:00] Um, and I was like, oh, okay, you get a pass. You know, you're lucky. You're lucky to know what lane you're in. So this lady, so I look over and it was a lady and I just had to laugh and I don't know if you've ever done this, Joe, but I'm sure some of my you listeners have where you fucked up when driving and then you correct yourself and that car that you fucked up, up in front of and maybe almost cut off wrecked or whatever is going to pass you.
And there's no fucking way you are making eye contact with this person at all. This woman's hands were. 10 and two, but not relaxed. They were 10 and two straightforward. And she was looking, I mean, it was a, it was like, you know, she was not gonna make eye contact with me and I just rolled. I was just like, you go girl.
It's okay. And I wanted to go. It's okay. I'm not mad, I'm not cussing at you today. I am good. Um, my serenity is good. So that's my little story, so thank you for bearing with me. But I, I just, it's always fun coming here. Um, it's, it's always an adventure that, that. [00:04:00] 30 minute drive. That 20 minute, that 30 minute drive that I make a 20 minute drive
So ladies and gentlemen, back to the subject at hand. Today is gonna be a short one, but it's a good one. Um, I've been wrestling with, as I was telling Joe before, I, I've been, I had this idea because I wanna give you pantry items. And so I'm like, okay, I have this idea of where, and I call 'em speed bumps. I think I've mentioned them in the podcast prior to some degree.
But what they are, they're little caches. I think in video games people get caches and you get more weapons, you get more, you know, along your journey. Sure. Yeah.
Joe: So
Christine Spratley: I try to put cachets and speed bumps in my day, in my daily activities, um, that give me things that gimme joy, that gimme happiness, whatever.
And. Um, I was thinking about this. I'm like, and I, and I knew I had the, the speed bumps and the cachets, [00:05:00] but I couldn't figure out where this was coming from or why this was going, you know, where this genesis was of this idea for me. And, but it goes along with, um, kind of the H-B-I-C-I-C theme of
Self-responsibility and self-accountability in that. So I started remembering and looking back and there is a, when I ran away, I couldn't say goodbye to two of my best friends, um, Julie and Amy. I. And, um, amazing friends, and I'm sure they're, and, and they were amazing women when the last time I saw them, which was many, many, many years ago.
We don't, we don't keep in touch anymore. I, I see them every once on Facebook, um, or one of those social media. But again, life gets busy and whatever, whatever. But I . I couldn't say goodbye to them and, and they were my neighbors. And just so everybody understands, neighbors [00:06:00] back in Iowa, when you grow up on a farm is like they live two miles away, but.
They, we rode the bus together. We, I mean, you know, the bus dropped them off and then it drove down a mile and a, you know, a mile and a half and drove, dropped me off at the end of my lane and, you know, and, and so every day we, we rode together and there were one grade behind and then another grade behind.
So they were one and two years behind me in school. And, and I just have always, they were such, I don't even know that they know how much they meant to me. I'm kind of thinking about this for the first time in a long time. Um, but they did, and I, and I, I need to let them know what a big difference they made in my life.
Um, and I still think about them with grace today. I just, this grace and this love that they gave me. So anyway, this is a poem that I found between the time I was in Mr. Rawlings office and, and was talking to my sister about leaving. And the time I actually left, I found this poem. [00:07:00] I don't know why I, I think it was a Nike ad.
I, I'm not even sure if it was a Nike ad. I don't remember where I found it. Um, but it's called after a while, and I'm gonna do two things. I'm gonna read the poem today because it gives you a genesis and they're, but we're not gonna take the whole poem. We're gonna just take a section of the poem for which these cachets and these speed bumps come.
And where I really feel like the self-accountability and responsibility comes from. It's, and it's interesting, Joe, to kind of look back at my life and go, wow, this was planted way back then. And, and anytime I've had to step up in my life, like quit bitching about the shit that's on my side of the street or who put it there, but clean it up.
This is what I've gone to. And so it's called after a while and. It's by Jose or Jorge Louise Burgess. And it was revised, I guess, and copyrighted by Veronica, [00:08:00] um, Shaw stall, SHA stall. And um, it's called after a while, so I'm gonna read it. But there's a line in here that's really important to me, and it says, after a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul.
And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning and company doesn't mean security. I. You begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't promises, and you begin to accept your defeats with your head held up and your eyes open with the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child. And you learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans and futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.
After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much. So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers. And you learn that [00:09:00] you really can endure, that you really are strong and that you really do have worth. And you learn and learn with every goodbye you learn.
And, um.
Ooh, that takes me back. Um, and, um, it takes me back. And it, it also, um, to me is just a really amazing way for me to look at myself as a, as a woman and, um, as a head bitch in charge. Um, and again, if, if you like this poem, I can spend some time on it, um, each section, because each section to me has something as a meaning.
Um, so if you like it, let me know and we can do segments on it. But today, the, the, where I'm gonna go with this and what I wanna focus [00:10:00] on with this is the, the line in here that says, so you, you plant your own garden. Decorate your own soul instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers. Couple things.
First of all, it doesn't say so. No one has to bring you flowers. It doesn't say, I don't need someone to bring me flowers. Okay? It just says, instead of waiting. So this idea for me, I'm an HBIC and I am, I am enough, and that I do this. Doesn't mean that others can't give to me. It just means that if I'm wanting water, I take a drink of water.
Okay? And in order to do that, I have to plant my own garden and decorate my own soul. And this is also a lot about, we kind of talked about this last time of, you know, the turd. What herds are decorating my soul that somebody else has [00:11:00] put in there? And what do I need to decorate my soul with? What do I choose to decorate my soul with?
And so we're, again, we're not gonna go down this and explore all this. What I'm gonna show you is where it shows up to be today, but it's not gonna, you know, it's not So planting my own garden today, the flowers that I'm gonna talk about are confidence, joy, and, and humor. Those are things that I really want in my life, okay?
And so planning my own garden could mean going to therapy and all that stuff, but I'm not talking about that. I am talking about I got shit to do today. How the hell am I gonna have some joy, some humor, and some confidence as I go about my day? Because I don't always wake up with all the energy I need and all the joy and all the confidence that I need to get through my day.
Um, and so . When I plant my own garden, those, that's what I'm gonna plant. Those are the flowers and I'm gonna decorate my soul. So how the hell do you do that? [00:12:00] Couple things you guys know. I love music, so I do playlist and I do, I do. I have, the last year or so I created my Monday morning commute playlist.
It isn't some, I mean, I've got everything from Lebanese relaxing instrumental music to 50 cent to Queen, to, you know, George Strait on my playlist. But this playlist is my throw down. I'm gonna get my, you know, I'm gonna go kind of, you know, and do my thing. It's like, it's got Lady Marlot, it's got Bonnie Rad.
It's, you know, it's, it's, it's this energy music. Um, and so I've got that. So . I've also got playlists that I, from when I used to go into big meetings and they were kind of boss up playlists, like, don't fuck with me. Kind of playlist. And, and I just get that energy and get that, you know, thing and that laughter.
And then I've got, I've got kind of my, I, [00:13:00] I've got my morning playlist, which is, I wake up to, you know, boothing. You're my little boo thing. And, and for, I don't wanna wake up to it all morning. Some mornings I know that I'm gonna need something like Keisha's woman or, you know, but I do that, I put playlists and, and they're not just all one sided.
Um, they're, they're very different. But that's what I do. And then I put them into rotations. Um, within those playlists. Each of 'em I have Teddy swim's amazing in there. Now I do that because I do this amazing challenge, which is I. When I hear that song come on for the entirety of that song, as much as I can, I look in the mirror and I say those words to myself instead.
'cause I was like, oh, I wish somebody felt this way about me. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. This is how my husband thinks about me. And I was like, wait a minute. I need to think that way about me. I need to see that about me. And depending on how I feel about myself, [00:14:00] sometimes looking in the mirror through that whole song is really fucking hard.
Some days I shine and I smile, . And I'm glorious. And then other days I'm like grabbing the sink so I don't look away and I'm crying because I feel so not amazing. Um, so, but it's mixed in, it's mixed into that cachet of a playlist. So even within my playlist, I have cachets of, of you are, you're good.
You're good enough. You got this girl. Um, the other is humor. If you, lord forbid you get caught with me in an elevator, I'm not gonna chat you up like the progressive commercial, but I'm just kind of like the progressive commercial light where I'm gonna make some, you know, if you're wearing a baseball cap and it's, you know, the Yankees, I'm gonna make some snarky ass comment.
The other day, somebody had a a, a Boston Red Sox hat on, and I, you know, made some comment and he, and he's like, well, we're, you know, we're, what's your team? And I was like, the pirates. And [00:15:00] he was like, well, and he had the best comeback. He's like, well, you guys just do is farm, raise grape pitchers and then send him away for nothing.
And I was like, well, yeah, that's right. We kind of do, you know, but we've got a great stadium, you know, with no blind spots. Um, and so again, . I do that because that interaction gives me energy, but it also makes somebody smile. I, I made a. I notice glasses on on women or guys that I go, do you get a haircut?
Even if they don't have a haircut, typically they smile, you know? And they're like, no. And I'm like, well, you look good. You know, and or or their glasses or something. The women that at another thing, humor and and interaction. 'cause this humanness, this community, and this is what I think is kind of missing, is just
I don't, I don't wanna sit down. I, I wanna have a connection with you just because it's good and it's fun. I don't wanna have a connection with everybody. If you're an asshole, I don't wanna have a connection with [00:16:00] you. But the women at where I get my allergy shots, there's three women up the front, one gentleman, and then two, the nurses in the back usually, and.
I used to bring in my coffee mugs and it, you know, if you mow me in my mugshot, I have some pretty ory coffee mugs and, um, some of them are kind of silly and some of them are a little bit profane and some of, you know, so they're always interested. But we have this interaction and what it's done and this is where it can go.
So. I come in one day and we're just doing our thing, and I tell 'em what's, you know, Hey, I'm, I'm running late , but I got a 15 minute grace period there. So I, I usually call, but I'm running late and I go in and they're check me in and we're laughing or whatever. Show me your mug, what's going on and how you doing?
And um, and the other day I come in and she's like, you're always in such a great mood. And Joe, it was the day, I think it was Monday. Um. Where I [00:17:00] said, let me show you the coffee mug I have and for any, for any of you that aren't on my coffee mug crew, my mugshot crew, my coffee mug for Monday, um, or the, the day that in question was a dog butt scooting across the carpet and it basically said, my ass is dragging this morning.
So it was funny to me that she thought I was in such a good mood, . I was like, look at where I've been. And she just started laughing. But it made the connection and then we got talking and, but, but again, this is someone who, I don't know him from Adam. I don't know what's going on in their life. I don't need to know to have that connection.
We don't need to have some, some real huge bond, but I guarantee you those women . What they give off to me is just grace and joy, and that gives me back, you know, I wanna give 'em back. Um, you know, it's just funny. We share little things. The, the woman who did my, when I did my [00:18:00] allergy shots, she, you know, did my allergy shots and I'm allergic to everything.
So I almost passed out and on her arm said or on her, yeah, on her arm. It said, I'm enough. And I had just gotten my tattoo of I'm enough. So I look for connections. I look for ways. So again, what are your speed bumps? I, I, I'm kind of almost, I don't know why I'm saying I'm not embarrassed, but I do silly things.
Like I write little notes. Thank you for your service. And I put it on like little stick it fucking things on people's windshield when I know that they, when I see their sticker or I'm in the grocery store and I, they're in their thing and. Because I'm a shit. Um, I always write from, I don't always, I didn't, I've stopped doing this, but during the whole election cycle and all that shit, I wrote from a democrat, , thank you for your service from doing, because I just wanted everybody to know that, you know, we do appreciate the military.
Um, we, as an I do, and I happen to be, you know, a, a Democrat. So. But again, it's, it's [00:19:00] looking for the, the ways of having that connection that give me energy. Another example is I used to, where I used to live, um, there's a, there's a lady, there's a manager at Harris Teeter, um, at Creedmore in Millbrook in Raleigh, North Carolina.
Her name is Judith, and I believe she's a manager. She's in charge whatever the in charge person is, and she's very. So I met, this is how I got my first interaction with you. I, I mean, you can see, 'cause they're the ones kind of supervising and basically unscrewing up everybody's screw ups. And so I'm in there and I've gone to the store like for the fifth time to bake something 'cause I'm gonna bake something for some big thing.
And I needed eggs and I'm whipping through and if anybody doesn't know me, I'm, I'm sort of a bull in a China shop. Not sort of, I am a bull in a China shop. and um, so I'm flipping through a hundred things, phones ring, you know, doing all these things. And I go to scan the eggs and the scan is on, the [00:20:00] bo is on the top, so I flip it over, which you can't do that.
And expect eggs to stay in their carton. . So in the midst of like, I think, I don't know if it was Thanksgiving, I don't know what it was. It was a holiday is all I remember. I have now taken, you know, 24 eggs or 18 eggs and they're all over the fucking floor at Harris Teeter.
Joe: Oh man.
Christine Spratley: I'm like, ah. And she comes over there and she's, and of course she is in lockdown mode, gonna clean this up and get this go, you know, you're jamming up the line.
She is just gracious and wonderful. And I, I said something and of course I used a cuss word and she's like, oh honey, it's okay. We don't need to cuss. And I just laughed at her 'cause I was like, oh, I'd be cousin. If I were you, I'd be cousining at me. But again. What I, what happened was, is I made that connection.
So every time I go in there, or I used to go in there was, um, Hey, how, how the, how the eggs doing today? You know, and just that [00:21:00] connection, which made her smile and anybody dropped any eggs today? And, and she may come back with, no, you, but you haven't gotten finished shopping yet. Or, you know, just this back and forth and, and so these little things that give you joy, um, and that make you laugh.
That you don't expect. So plan those things. Um, I do it with, I do it with music, I do it with, I do it with comedy. Um, you know, my, my social media is full of things that make me crack up. And I, I do that instead of spending hours and hours scrolling and I literally go, okay, you're going take 10 minutes of this and 30 minutes of comedy.
You know, um, I send out notes, um, to people when I think of them. That's another thing. 'cause I, there's nothing that I love better than getting somebody to say, Hey, you're awesome just thinking of you. Or, I saw this [00:22:00] and that made me think of you, and by the way, this is what you've meant to me. Um, and what happens typically is when I do that, maybe not immediately, but
Weeks or months go by and all of a sudden I get a note from that person. And so it's like you're putting out this stuff into the world, and I know it's law of attraction and everything, but I'm planting my own garden. I'm planting the seeds of, of laughter and joy and confidence.
Another [00:23:00] I never used to wear a lot of makeup. I mean, I used to wear a lot of makeup, but, and now I don't, but I wear lipstick. I, it makes me feel good. So for me, it's a feeling when I feel a certain way, then I walk a little bit taller, even when I feel shitty, you know, what is it looking pretty, feeling shitty, you know?
But eventually I start look feeling how I look. Um, and so one of my things, and ladies try this, um, , go get you some [00:24:00] badass. Underwear, and I don't, I don't like panties, so I use the, I use bras. So I go to Perky lady once a year. I try to, and I go in and I buy really nice bras and they're, and there are things that, and they have this thing where if you've never been to a shop where they know their shit, like it's not a shop, a normal shop where you go in and you browse, you go in.
You set up an appointment and you go in and they look at you and they talk to you for a little bit and they take you to the dressing room and they talk to you and they go, we're gonna bring you some stuff. And you're like, yeah, right. And I'll never forget, she, she brought this little blue thing, it had some flowers and you know, I'm not real girly.
Um, or didn't think I was, it wasn't the story I told myself, but I it was, it is the, and it, she, I put it on. I was like, whoa, I like this. I like the way they sit. I like everything about this. And so when I've got something, if I'm speaking, my [00:25:00] bras look really good. I may screw up on stage, but I got shit in here that's giving me confidence.
It was just something about it. I used to do networking. Networking made me so fucking nervous, hated it. I've got hacks for that now too, but I would literally go in and, and this has proven, go in and sit in the bathroom stall, put my feet square on the ground, spread my legs, and be like, all right, I got this.
And I'd give myself a little peptide or I'd walk into the mirror and I'd stand like, you know, the superwoman pose. There's actually something that happens to you. When I'm in a meeting, I plant my feet squarely and I lean in and I, you know, and, and I'm there and it gives me this energy, and, and it's always, it's always something I, I don't know, I just.
I want to do that because it makes me calmer or more calm [00:26:00] and allows me to breathe and then I've got the brains to get through it. It's never, it's, you know, it is funny 'cause it's, sometimes it's about do I understand the situation and everything, but other times it's just the energy around it to get through it.
And so I do things like that that give me energy. I . You know, I, I'm a, I'm a post-it nut sticker note on my, on my mirrors and stuff. Um, you, you, you're amazing is on this. No, I didn't put it there. It's on the mirror in my, in my house that I rent. It's like you're amazing. It's on my mirror along with, you know, different things from people that, that people have given to me.
Um, I've got You're the hero of your own story. On my mirror. So I look at that every day. Again, these are things, these are little notes. These are little, you know, you know, like when you [00:27:00] bowl and you're bowling down, you have to put the bumper lanes out. You know, they keep me going, you know, I may bong off this, or I may bong off the right side or, and run over to the left side.
I've talked about the ditches, and then you find the middle of the rain. But these things help me go there, and that's how I plant my own flowers or my own garden. And then I decorate my soul with it. and where the decoration comes in is what I end up getting back. That is just amazing. I, um, I, I had I, I'll tell you about Genesee and, and Nevaeh and Joelle, I don't think I've ever talked about them.
They're, they're, they're friends of mine. They're, Genesee is a, is a woman and Joel and Neva are her children. And I've gotten to know them over the past year and, and, um, I. I, I, she gives me stickers and I put that sticker, it was a grape sticker, and it smelled, and I put it on my mirror, my rear mirror. And so every time I look in the mirror on the right hand, [00:28:00] lower right hand corner, there was that grape sticker.
And it fell off. And it fell off about two months ago. And I called her and I said, I need your grape sticker. And so I've seen her since then. She didn't have this, you know, I need a sticker. I need a sticker. And, um, and she, and this is what I'm talking about, so I need a sticker, you know. I look at that sticker nevaeh and it makes me happy.
It makes me, it makes me smile. 'cause it does. Again, that's the garden that I planted. I planted that there and then today she left, her mom left me, Genesee left me a voicemail that, that said, Hey, listen, or I want to let you know that Nevaeh said this morning that we need to go find Christine some stickers so she can be happy and, and we need to do it right away.
That is decorating my soul. Like I could never understand, like, like I, I never knew that was gonna come and hit me so hard and so graciously. [00:29:00] And it's all because we have this interaction and I put a sticker up, you know, so that's kind of the powers of stickers.
Joe: Are you familiar, um, with the, the, the broadcast is a farming term?
That's where it came from. So it reminds me of what you're talking about. Mm-hmm . You've got all these techniques and tactics to, and so broadcast comes from a farmer just grab a handful of seed and just, and they broadcast it out broadly, cast it, and then it got turned into like, you know, a TV term.
Mm-hmm . But that's, it came from farmer because of
Christine Spratley: the news and the way you throw the communication. Throwing it out there. Yes. Right. But it's, it's sewing of the field, right. Is where it comes from.
Joe: But you've got, this is your technique. You've got a handful of like, here's a bunch of stuff that makes me happy and I'm gonna throw it out there.
And it's, some of it's gonna stick and some of it, some of it might not, and some of it might take six months to grow up. But
Christine Spratley: yeah. And, and the thing is, and I'll tell you another example. Who was I talking with? I, I, the other, I was talking with somebody and we were talking about giving forgiving [00:30:00] sake. And I was going through a situation, um, mid-career, I guess you'd call it.
I had left my company and I had settled with them. And before when I left I was like broke as shit, like broke as shit. Like I will not eat ragu spaghetti sauce ever again in my life because that's all I could afford. It was a buck 25 and I ate that. And pasta the cheap kind and I just am sick of it.
Like I never need to eat that shit again. It's really good. Not knocking my, I'm just saying I'm not gonna eat it. Um. I didn't have money for a long time. Then we settled and I got some money and so I got to go to Starbucks and there was this guy on the corner and I'm passing Starbucks. I was in Austin, Texas.
I was passing, passing, um, to turn around to go into Starbucks. So I had to pass him and I went in and I didn't have any change really that I wanted to give him. So let's, let's be honest, I didn't wanna give him a 20. Um, [00:31:00] so I went into Starbucks and I broke it and I got, I got him a hot chocolate. I'm feeling pretty good about myself, so I go, I make the U-turn to come back and I go down, I give it to him, and as I'm turning around, I see him take it and flick it.
Just, he was, it was like I had, I had pissed in his Wheaties. I mean, it was the, he was pissed. It's like I'm
Joe: lactose intolerant. Exactly.
Christine Spratley: And I'm like, and I'm like. Well and I was like, no, you're giving forgiving sake, Christine. This is like, no, like I don't know what he, but, but you did it. And so it's like you put this shit out there and it has not, like you say, I've cast it out there and sometimes it's an immediate head and sometimes people just look at me like they just look at me like I've got three heads, which is okay.
I was talking with someone the other day. And I said, yeah, just give 'em a compliment. Just compliment. And they're like, what if they don't take it? I'm like, well then that's Just because they don't receive it doesn't mean you can't give it. [00:32:00] You know? Just give it, just put it out there. Shit. If you think of something's nice on somebody, if you think they're doing something nice, like why the hell not?
I mean, this is also too, just a little side note and then I'll go back to this, but we, I bitch about the negativity and how much I don't connect and how this, and how that, and how this, but I'm not tilling my own ground. What am I focusing on? Why am I not being nice to someone and making them smile? Why am I not connecting?
What am I just supposed to connect to the people right here? Well, fuck, they're not here all the time, so let me connect with the people right in front of me. . You know, let's put, you know, if you've ever waited tables and you no longer wait tables, next time you go in, make a, and you see what's going on behind the line, or the cashier make her smiles, you know what that's like?
That is where I decorate. That is how I plant my own garden because some days I can do these big, huge, amazing things. Have a spa [00:33:00] day, and my decoration is wonderful and my soul is at ease, and I can go meditate on top of a mountain, but nine times outta the 10 I am driving down ball of noose 10 minutes late, and I need to see a little sticker from a five-year-old girl who, who thinks I rock the world.
And that's enough joy to get me through. So my challenge or my homework, or whatever the hell you wanna call it, is. How can you plant your own garden, ladies, what would be in your garden? And don't make it something big. Make it something that tickles your heart. Make it something that counts in the moment.
You know? What's your walkup music? I used to start out meetings with Pfizer on What's your Walkup music? And I'll never forget the first time we did it. Corporate out of new, well, they're New York dad. I think they were in New Jersey at the time. Um, we had the people at the, we had people from the facility, and then we had government affairs.
And then [00:34:00] we had my team who was like, what is she up to? You know? And I'm like, all right, everybody, what's your, what's your walkup music? And they're like, what? And I had to explain walkup music. And walkup music is, you know, what would you walk up to the plate and hit, you know, out of the park to jack you up and get you pumped up?
And it was everything from . Gospel music to Kenny Rogers. You gotta know when to hold him, which was funny because it was the, the director of finance who brought up that one. And then we've got other hip hop stuff. We've got everything. And, but again, that all stemmed from, I was coming in that morning with my playlist and so I was like, what is my walkup music?
What is your walkup music ladies? What would decorate your soul? Go plant it. Go plant it. And, and so think about that and think about, and if you're, if you're having a hard time with, oh, what if something blossomed in your soul? What if something nice was added to your soul [00:35:00] and you didn't have to wait for it?
You could just plan it yourself. You could just make somebody laugh and then laugh at their smile. You know, you could just do something little. Sometimes that's all I can get outta my day is something little, and that's enough. So ladies, gentlemen, everyone plant your own garden and decorate your own soul instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And if they do bring you flowers, then add 'em two to your soul. Don't just wait. Your soul is so precious that it deserves to be decorated until next time. Tubs,
[00:36:00]