6 First Dates

What is CatChing Feelings?

Cat's newly single!! Stick around for all the things about being 50 and single. We'll talk about divorce, motherhood, dating and relationships and of course fitness!

Hey, guys.

Corey, thanks for joining.

Caleb, welcome.

Appreciate you being here.

Let me know how my audio is,

because I could not find my

AirPods before I went live.

So somebody tell me if it

sounds like garbage or not.

Can you hear me at all?

Can you hear me?

Can you hear me?

Okay.

Well,

we'll assume that everyone can hear

me then.

Let's hope.

So much to talk about.

So much to talk about.

So first of all,

let's talk about the elbow.

So elbow update.

I've got some SteriStrips on

it because the scar is not

really healing that well.

I have full range of motion,

pretty much pretty good.

I front squatted.

a little tiny bit of weight

on Monday morning.

Um,

I didn't feel comfortable adding weight

to the front rack position.

So I back squatted,

but even in this position

in the back squat,

the elbow felt really good.

So I'm happy about that.

Um, I did yesterday.

It was really dumb.

Uh,

there were kettlebell swings and

pull-ups in the workout.

And I decided that I would

do kettlebell swings up and overhead.

with like an eighteen pound kettlebell,

the pink one.

So super light.

But I did take both hands up

and then I did pull ups.

I did banded pull ups,

strict banded pull ups.

I switched between banded

pull ups and ring rows.

It was pretty good.

I messed around with my grip a little bit.

This grip was not good for the elbow.

A normal pull up grip was

much better for that.

I was a little sore

yesterday because of it, but

nothing that like kept me up

at night or anything like that.

And I'm still taking those

peptides that I talked to

you guys about the, um,

BP C BCP one fifty seven

and something else.

Um, so I'm taking those every day, um,

and injecting them like

right into my elbow.

Um, so we'll see how that goes.

Uh, so that's the elbow story.

I didn't work out today.

I am,

I woke up with a massive calf cramp

at like seven AM.

Um,

not sure why I don't think I'm drinking

enough, but, uh,

Hi guys.

Sucking on these nuts showed up.

I love it.

All right.

We're official now.

I can stop the show.

Uh, he or she is here.

So we're good.

And, uh, Kenneth,

nice to have you here as well.

Thanks for listening.

Hope I can entertain you a little bit,

but we are going to get

into all the dating stuff.

I promise.

But I wanted to get some of

my personal updates out first.

Not that dating's not personal,

but you know what I mean?

Um,

I wanted to catch you guys up on my

band audition from last night.

So this is very exciting.

Um,

a friend of mine from I've

known her forever.

We worked together as

waitresses at a restaurant

in college and her husband has a band.

Um, well, he's been in a bunch of bands.

He's starting a new band.

Uh, it's an eighties cover band.

It's called members only right now.

Tony's the drummer and we have,

I met Tim and Bob.

They're both, um, Tim is lead.

No,

Tim is bass guitar and Bob is lead

guitar.

We're looking for someone to do keyboards.

and I practiced with them

last night we played five

or six songs um I was super

nervous and tony just kept

saying like don't worry

about it um we just need

your energy right we just

need when the guys are no I

don't think anyone's single

unfortunately um but um it

was fun uh I think I did a

good job I didn't totally

suck there are a couple

songs that I didn't like

practice well enough or

know how to sing you know

it's weird when you sing

songs from the radio or

you're listening to them on

Spotify or whatever,

as the lyrics are happening,

you sort of get these

little tiny micro cues to

be able to know what the

words are and how the timing is.

But when people are playing

music around you and like

the singer that sings,

the song is not singing it with you.

It's a little nerve wracking.

And so my timing was off a

little bit and those guys

were pretty rusty too.

So anyway, they, um,

they offered me the

position of lead singer and I accepted.

So we start rehearsals next

week and we're going to go

probably once a week with rehearsals.

We need thirty to thirty

five songs to create three

decent playlists,

like three sets of ten

songs to be able to get some gigs.

And, you know,

we'll be in dive bars and

little small venues around town,

but it should be really fun.

So here's what I'm asking you guys to do.

This is going to be in the comments,

not the chat,

because I won't go back and

look at the chat,

but in the comments for the show,

I need you to give me

recommendations for

eighties or early nineties

dance songs that an alto

can sing because I have a

very low singing voice.

And that's kind of the genre

that we're looking at.

So it doesn't have to be

songs that women sing.

We did some Billy Joel last night.

We did Casey and the Sunshine Band.

We did some Go-Go's, which is really hard.

Go-Go's is kind of really too high for me.

Um, and then what else did we do?

Oh, I did, uh,

I sang zombie from the cranberries.

That was really fun.

Um, but yeah, if you think about it,

let me know.

I'm creating a playlist.

I actually want to maybe

share my Spotify playlist.

It's called audition.

Maybe I can make it public

and you guys can go on

there and just add songs in, um,

doing like a little share,

some share and some other things.

So it's going to be really fun.

Uh, yeah.

Craig says Duran Duran bangles.

I have to, it's funny.

There's so many songs that I like,

and I have to really just

listen to them to determine

whether I think I'm

confident in singing them or not,

and that they aren't too, too high.

Because our lead guitar guy

will also do backup vocals,

but he doesn't have a high voice either.

So we need, I don't know,

we need to belt stuff out,

but my throat is sore from doing that.

And now I have to protect my voice,

maybe not talk so much here,

but for tonight,

we're gonna make it work.

What else?

Little housekeeping.

I want to know if this time,

do we like this time, Wednesdays at five?

Because I was thinking about

moving it to Tuesdays at eight PM.

But quite honestly,

that might interfere with my social life.

Not that I have one at all right now,

but I'm just like looking

towards the future.

But we can talk about that

in the comments too.

We'll figure out how many

people get in to watch and

how well the episode goes.

And it could also be based on the content.

Content could suck today and

nobody would want to watch it.

So we'll see.

But I do like Wednesday at

five because I'm just

wrapping up my work day and

I'm already here at the

computer and I just switch

some monitors around and do that.

So, okay, ready?

We're going to talk about six states.

I'm going to tell you right now,

I'm struggling today.

I am, I don't know what it is,

but I'm like not just...

Somebody told me when I

first broke up with my

boyfriend that I needed to

be single for six months

before I even thought about

dating someone.

And I think because we were

sort of on again, off again for so long.

And I'm talking like

probably since October,

I feel like I've already like,

I don't know,

done the healing or figured

out what I want.

Like I I'm fifty two years old.

I know what I want.

And I

you know,

was married for twenty years before I had,

you know,

a very serious boyfriend for

almost two years.

Like I'm not built.

I want a person like I'm so affectionate.

I like was so sad yesterday.

Like I needed someone to hug me.

Like I just needed physical attention.

And I've been I've been on

dates like I went on two dates last week,

but I'm just not getting what I need.

And

And like being ready,

what does that mean even?

Like, oh, now you're ready to date.

Like, oh,

you just got out of a long-term

relationship.

You're not ready for something serious.

Like,

I feel like if I meet the right person,

then you're ready.

Like, it's not,

I'm not going to meet the

right person to be like, oh, sorry.

No, like I'm not ready yet.

Like we should wait.

I don't know.

I don't know what you guys

think about that,

but that just seems like,

and I feel like the people

that are telling me that

have been single for a really long time.

And, and they're okay being single.

And again, I'm okay being single.

Like I'm by myself here all the time.

It's just,

I want somebody to share stuff

with besides my,

my poor kids who are now like bearing, um,

my emotional neediness with, you know,

the memes and the, you know,

all the conversations that

I want to have.

And, you know,

my poor mom is probably

tired of hearing about it too.

But anyway, that's just,

that's just what I was thinking about.

So we'll,

we'll weave that into these stories, but,

um,

Here, we're going to start with the dates.

So and I'll try, you know,

I'm going to be kind.

Obviously,

I don't I'm some of these people

I still talk to.

Some of them know I have this podcast,

some of them don't.

So, you know,

we're kind of all over the place.

My poor mother is freaking

out that I'm doing this at all.

She's like,

you obviously don't want a

serious relationship if

you're airing your dirty

laundry on the Internet.

And I guess she doesn't

understand that this is

like therapeutic or

cathartic for me to share.

Um, and like I said,

it's just part of who I am.

And obviously if I were to

get into some kind of, you know,

meaningful relationship with somebody,

I'm not gonna, you know,

be disclosing all of those

nitty gritty details, you know,

to you guys,

at least in a way that's salacious,

right.

Or that,

that anyone would be interested in.

So, um, I don't know, we'll see.

But anyway, okay.

So I started out on Facebook dating and I,

you guys saw, you know, the worst of

those profiles last week that I showed you,

but there were, you know,

of the thousand swipes, there were,

you know, five or six people that I,

that I matched with.

So I liked them.

They liked me.

We started chatting on the app.

Um,

I personally need to have like a

physical connection with

somebody in order for me to

be attracted to them.

And so I try not to

text endlessly on the apps

for days and days and get

to know all these things

about somebody before we actually meet.

Because I pretty much know

when I meet someone right away,

if there's some kind of spark,

some kind of attraction,

some kind of chemistry, um,

Some people disagree with

that and say like, oh no, you need,

you know,

a couple of dates to sort of

figure that out.

And I don't know, for me, like I said,

I just, it's either there or it isn't.

So, and I'll jump to date number two,

actually the second date.

So this guy, we'll call him beach guy.

We matched on Facebook dating.

We had a ton of mutual

friends actually on Facebook.

So we sort of traveled.

Adjacently in some of the same circles,

even though he lived a

little bit further away,

but he had connections to this area.

Um,

and we talked a lot on the dating app

and only because he lived so far away.

Like our date,

we had planned a date pretty quickly,

but it was maybe a week out

or a week and a half out

from the time that we started chatting.

Um, and so we, we chatted and we bonded,

like we got really excited

to see each other.

We, you know, we had great conversations.

We never, we didn't talk on the phone.

But just the banter back and forth was,

you know, it was adult and it was just,

it felt good.

And so, I mean,

he and I were giddy before

our first date.

Like he's like, oh, one more sleep.

And I'm like, oh, I know I can't wait.

Like he's like,

I'm gonna give you such a big hug.

Like we were super,

super excited to meet each other.

So much so that I actually

offered to meet him in my apartment.

Like I felt that comfortable

with him that I was like,

let's just hang out here.

Like we have so much to talk

about and so many things in

common that I figured,

we would just meet here and

hang out and get some

takeout or do whatever.

And it would be, you know, kosher.

So that's what we did.

And I mean, the moment I opened the door,

I think I just, I don't know if there was,

I was happy to see him and

he was a great hugger and

we had a great conversation again,

but for me,

there just wasn't like that spark or that,

that chemistry that I was hoping to feel.

And so,

you know, the date played out.

We sat on the couch, we watched TV,

we got food.

Like it was perfectly fine.

He was a complete gentleman, you know,

nothing crazy happened.

Um, I walked him to his car, you know,

he said that he wanted to

see me again and that was that.

And he left.

And then of course the next morning,

you know, I gave him the old, I,

I was actually getting,

I'm getting really good at this.

I'm telling people that we're not a match.

It's really hard to do in person.

Um, but I follow up pretty quickly.

So the next morning I was like, Hey,

thank you so much.

It was so great to meet you.

I appreciate you coming all

this way to meet me.

Um,

I really don't think there wasn't the

spark that I was hoping for.

You know, I think you're a great guy.

You know, I, I wish you the best of luck,

that kind of thing.

Um,

and that was hard for me to do because

he was a really good guy

and we did have a lot in common,

but it was just,

there was just something missing.

Um,

Yeah, I walked him to his car.

I live like on the third

floor of an apartment and I

just figured out,

figured that would be nice to him.

Did you find out he was poor?

No,

actually he was actually very affluent.

Guy has like three cars.

He has like a truck, a Ford Bronco,

like a brand new Ford Bronco.

Those really nice ones.

And a BMW.

So no, he definitely wasn't poor.

So that was date number two.

Anyway, so that was one and done.

Date number one,

I also met this guy on Facebook dating.

He was a little more local to me.

And we quickly decided to

meet up at a restaurant

when we met for appetizers.

He pulled up in a sprinter van.

And if anybody,

you guys don't really know

the history with my ex,

but one of the things that

he was really adamant about

doing later in life was

buying an RV and traveling

across the country.

Um, I have never been in an RV overnight.

Um,

I don't know that that's something I

would enjoy.

Um,

I've actually stayed at hotels where

they've had RV parks.

Um, I don't know.

It's just, I'm a hotel girl.

Sorry.

Like I'm not,

I'm not the camper necessarily.

I'm not as outdoorsy as

people might think.

Um, and so,

that's when he said that Sprinter van, he,

he like spends months at a

time in Colorado.

He's sort of like a little bit of a,

of a roamer.

Um, and for me, like,

I'm all about traveling and doing things,

but I don't want to like

move away from my family

and just like visit in the RV parking,

my daughter's driveway.

When I come visit my grandkids,

like that's not the vision

that I have for my future.

Um, and so I quickly, you know,

ascertained as we were

yeah does he drive it to

disney or universal that

would be the other place um

so that was that was kind

of a quick note I even we

we split the bill um like

there really wasn't any

kind of spark it was weird

I wasn't even really kind

of excited to go on that

date because I had already

started talking to the

beach guy that I really

connected with so it was

like those two things were

overlapping I was more

excited to meet the beach guy I think um

I have a really hard time

juggling more than one person.

Um,

and I absolutely can't like more than

one person at a time.

Like it's, I either like you or I don't.

And if there's other people

like in the periphery,

I like can't give them the time of day.

Um, that's again, that's just how I am.

So Sperner guy van was a no.

Um, I texted him,

I think right after the

date and was just like, Hey, sorry,

we're not a match.

Like good luck, blah, blah, blah,

whatever.

And I haven't heard from him since.

So that was easy.

Um, third date.

Um,

so CrossFit says no casual dating around.

That's just not, I wish I could,

to be honest with you.

I mean, I've had so many, um,

friends tell me like, just have fun,

just go out and like date a

bunch of people.

And I, I can't, I don't know.

I'm just not, that's not my DNA.

I can't do that.

I've never, I've never been like that.

I don't think, um,

Sagan wants to know was his

Vandas profile.

I don't think it was,

it's not something that we talked about.

It was like his third

vehicle or something.

It wasn't like his only vehicle,

but he was working on it

and maybe he thought I'd be

impressed that he brought it.

I don't know.

Um, anyway.

Okay.

So date number three, um,

date number three,

we're going to call him finance guy.

He was a little bit older

than I would not older,

more mature looking than

the first two guys that I,

that I went on dates with.

um, salt and pepper hair,

very distinguished.

She's very handsome, um, big into golf.

Um, he had just had back surgery.

He had like a discectomy.

Um, and I had just had my elbow surgery.

So we were sort of talking about,

this was like a month ago, um,

more than a month ago.

And he was like, oh, well, you know,

when we go out to dinner, he's like,

I'll cut your meat and you can hold,

you know, you can get me out of my chair.

We were just like joking around about how

stupidly crippled.

We both were going to be on this date.

Um,

so we decided to meet at a really nice

bar near his house,

but he couldn't drive.

So he was within walking distance from,

from the place.

And I traveled to go to him

knowing that he couldn't

drive was not a big deal.

Um, so we met, we had a really nice time.

He wasn't drinking because

he was on some kind of medication.

I had like one drink, um,

but it was a super classy place.

And I definitely addressed

more like a fifty two year

old woman than like a

teenager like I normally do.

Of course,

my mom was giving me advice and

I'm pretty sure my mom came

over the day before the

date and was like showing

me different outfits that I should wear.

Like she was bringing her

clothes from her business

time when she used to work

in an office and like

suggesting maybe I wear

that instead of what I normally wear.

She clearly doesn't approve of my style.

but great conversation.

And I even told him about

the first two dates.

Like I told him, you know,

I'd been on two dates and, you know,

there were no second dates and, you know,

I was getting better at telling people,

you know, that they weren't a match,

but that's really hard to do in person.

And he's like, yeah, you know,

that is hard to do in person.

And so we, he said to me,

I'd really like a second date.

He walked me to my car, gave me a hug.

I had a really nice time.

He was very intelligent.

We had a lot of things in common.

He used to do CrossFit, actually.

He told me that he had a he

had like a three seven

three seventy three forty

five Fran time or something like that.

Back in the day when when he

was doing CrossFit,

he was more into something else.

Now, I forget.

I think he's doing like

jujitsu or something like that.

But anyway.

Yeah.

So we had a lot in common.

He knew a bunch of CrossFit

gyms in the area and everything else.

So I was really actually

looking forward to date

number two with him because

he was of the three guys I dated,

he was the one that I would

have gone on a second date with.

And so we chatted that week.

He was, you know, good morning text,

good night text, the whole thing.

I was away at the beach with

my girlfriend for St.

Patrick's Day weekend,

came back that Monday.

He sort of,

he cooled off a little bit and

I could tell that he had cooled off and

Again,

that drives me crazy when people

just aren't open and honest

about how they're feeling.

He just pulled back a little bit.

And I was talking to my friend and I said,

oh, that's really weird.

I thought we were going to go out again.

And he hasn't been as

communicative as he used to be.

And she's like, well, just ignore it.

Don't text him.

Just wait for him to text me.

And I'm thinking, no, I want to know.

I'm not,

I appreciate guys when they put in

the effort and they tell me, but like,

if you're not going to want

to go out with me, like,

tell me because I will not

waste my time again,

because I cannot focus on

more than one person at a time.

If he didn't want to be around me again,

I needed to move on.

And I wasn't moving on

because I was sort of

waiting to see what was

going to happen on this date.

So again, Kat's intuition, so good.

Um, I always have to trust my gut.

I reached out to him and I was like, Hey,

how are you doing?

Um,

getting the feeling that

maybe you don't want a

second date like that's

totally fine could you just

let me know I'd like some

clarity and he wrote back

yeah sorry um you know I

think with my back right

now I'm just not in a

position to be in a

relationship and I was like

okay thanks um you know and

then I'm thinking to myself

you're on a dating app dude

like why would you be on a

dating app if you're not

ready to date but

And that's my other beef with you boys.

Just tell me it's not a match.

Just tell me that like I am

not for you because my

sorry ass will think like, oh, OK, well,

there's still a chance

because he just needs to

recover from this back

surgery and then he's going

to call me back and we're

going to go out.

Like, no,

just tell me you're not interested in me.

Like that is so much easier to do.

And I really wish.

more guys would do that

because that's what I did.

I wasn't saying to these guys like, oh,

I'm not ready for a

relationship because that

kind of sounds like, OK, well,

then when you are ready,

let's let's do that.

Right.

Exactly.

Corey,

I have played this meme and heard

this in my head.

The Jim Carrey thing from

Dumb and Dumber like.

Over and over again.

Yeah.

So you're saying there's a chance.

Yes.

So I hate that shit.

And whatever it is, it's fine.

So anyway, finance guy out.

Next up was hiking guy.

And I think I talked about

this on the podcast hiking guy.

Oh, and beach guy and hiking guy,

both sober, which again,

I could care less.

I actually dated, um,

a recovering alcoholic when

I was in high school,

he was or and I used to go the year,

my junior year of high school,

I spent Friday nights at AA

meetings and Saturdays like

playing Pictionary with

um, you know,

priests and people in recovery.

So for me,

like I was a saint my junior year,

I didn't get in any trouble.

I wasn't binge drinking with

my friends from high school.

I was doing that.

So, and again,

alcohol is not really a big thing for me.

I could take it or leave it.

So the fact that, um,

both of those guys were sober, um,

didn't really, um, bother me at all.

Um, but I will say that I would ask,

I asked them about their sobriety

evolution, you know,

like how long have they been sober?

Have they relapsed?

Like what caused it and all that?

Because I just think it's

important to understand.

Um,

and if somebody's sober and they're not

super, super, uh,

what's the word like

confident in their sobriety,

or if they're maybe not

working the steps or, you know,

maybe not in a good place or, oh,

I relapsed, you know, six months ago,

but it really wasn't that

big of a deal kind of a thing.

Like that's a red flag to me.

Um,

But just being sober, you know,

not a problem for me.

Anyway,

so hiking guy happened to be sober.

He had he brought up this

was the guy that I show up.

We go hiking right now.

Of course, Amy was ready to kill me.

She's like,

you cannot go hiking on a first date,

especially like at a state park.

Bring your gun or do something.

And so I didn't bring my gun,

but it was daylight and he

was bringing his dog.

And there was a lot of

people there where we went.

So I met him there.

I walk up, I'm casted.

I'm three days,

two days post-op on my elbow.

So I have a big cast, big A Spanish.

I can't even like wear a

sleeve on my arm and I show up.

Yeah.

Caleb hiking on a first date.

I'm sorry.

I know there's, there's a story there too,

because I ended up going

hiking again with another guy,

but it was the second date.

So I learned from my first, uh,

my first thing.

Um, so we go,

we met in the parking lot and.

He gave me a hug, you know, said hello,

saw my arm, was like, oh, my gosh.

I was like, yeah, whatever.

And we didn't really talk

about it because this dog

was like going down by the

water and he turned around

and we just started walking.

But this guy walked in front

of me the whole time.

He talked.

We had good dialogue back and forth,

I suppose,

but there was a certain point where.

He had to climb over a log

on the trail and he just

climbed over the log and

kept walking and like,

didn't turn back to see

like if I was okay or did I need help?

Which I didn't, but like,

it would have been nice to

at least like been felt

like I was being cared for.

Same thing on the way back.

He didn't check on me or

anything like that.

It also took him about

twenty five minutes into

the into the hike to even

ask me about my elbow,

which I just thought was really odd.

Like if I show up this big old cast.

Um, you know,

you should be asking questions.

Um, after the hike,

it started to get dark.

We sat at a picnic table.

He brought granola,

which I thought was really cute, um,

in a bowl.

And we sat there and, um,

and ate some granola and he

talked about a second date.

And I, you know,

at this point I'm kind of like, whatever,

maybe, you know,

I might have to do the old,

like text him in the

morning and tell him like,

it wasn't a match,

but I wasn't quite sure at this point.

And I had already been on

like three other dates that didn't work.

And I was just kind of like, well,

we'll see what happens.

So I was kind of looking

forward to what he had

planned for our second date.

He said he would take me to dinner.

And I think when he called

me the next night or texted

me later that night after, oh, we left.

He was parked here.

My car was way over here.

And he like walked me to the parking lot,

the edge of the parking lot,

gave me a hug and then like

went to his car and let me

go all the way down to the

other end of my car, which again,

like I would have

appreciated him if he

walked me to my car.

Um, his second date, um,

plans were not sufficient for me.

Let's just put it that way.

He recommended like a quick

service restaurant and I was like,

you know what?

No, that's not really what I'm into.

And there were obviously

some other things that, you know,

didn't jive with me.

So I quickly said, you know,

I think I'm going to pass on that.

And again, I was honest.

I wasn't, I didn't say like,

I'm not ready for a

relationship or anything

like that because, um,

I wanted him to be clear that it was just,

we weren't a good match.

So that was date number one.

Um, Caleb wants to know what restaurant,

um, pokey brothers was the restaurant,

which your girl loves a poke bowl,

but that's like, you know,

that's like after you've

been going out for a while

and you're at the mall and you know,

you want to,

you want to just get like a

nice little lunch.

Yes.

I like five guys too.

But again, it's not second date.

We're grownups guys, like take me out.

And I have a story for you about, um,

You know,

a guy that knows how to take you out.

Anyway, we're getting there.

So that was date number four.

Date number five was young guy.

We're going to call him young guy.

He was forty.

He I will preface this by

saying that he and I still

talk and we have agreed

that we are going to be friends.

Like I am his I'm his fitness advisor.

He's trying to put on some

weight and eat more protein

and lift heavier weights

and things like that.

So we've been talking about

that for a little bit.

Um, he's, he's very fun to talk to, but,

and I went on two dates with him,

but I haven't seen him since.

Um, so here's the deal.

Young guy met him on Bumble.

So this is my first Bumble date.

Um, Bumble's just another app.

And our first date, I was trying to think,

did I write down what our first date was?

Cause I don't remember what we did,

but it was funny when we were talking,

he was like, oh, let's go for a hike.

And I said,

I can't go on a hike for a first date,

maybe a second date.

And he was like, uh, okay.

Um, Oh, first date.

I remember what we did.

We went to a sports bar and hung out, um,

up the road, really cool place.

Um, we watched, I don't know,

was there basketball?

It might've been right

around the time when March

Madness was starting.

Um, and we went there.

Yes, it was.

And we went there to watch basketball.

So I got there first and

there were so many guys

there watching basketball

that I texted my

girlfriends the second I

walked in and I was like,

dude,

we are coming here next Friday for

happy hour because there

are so many guys here.

Like it would be a perfect

place to like meet some people.

So anyway,

but I met a young guy there and

we chatted for a bit.

Um, he was very nice.

We had a good conversation.

He has a good job.

He works, um, he works from home.

I work from home.

He has a house, he has a car, like all,

all things, never married, no kids.

Um, we had a nice time,

totally like plutonic, gave me a hug.

Goodbye.

Um, that was on a Friday, I think.

And then Sunday he asked me

to go on a hike.

Uh, the weather was nice and whatever.

So we went, we went on a hike and, um,

the hike was nice.

And then we went out for dinner afterwards,

like to, again, to a bar,

but we just like hung out.

we were being really pretty

flirty with each other like

physically flirty with each

other which um was fun like

really fun especially

because he was like so

young it sort of boosted my

ego a little bit but we had

I had a conversation with

him on that second date

about kids because again I

am uh I'm looking for a

person I'm not looking a

casual date so I figured

like if I'm gonna go on

another date with this guy

like I need to know does he

want kids because I can't

give him kids and uh

you know, he's only forty.

And, you know,

he talked about the fact that, you know,

he might like kids, you know,

but here he is, he's forty and he,

you know,

hasn't locked anything down yet.

And so.

He basically said like he was, you know,

sixty or seventy percent

want kids and thirty or

forty percent doesn't want kids.

And I'm like at that point, I'm like, OK,

well,

I need to just find him a younger

person to date because it's

probably not going to be me.

So.

We, we came back to my apartment.

Things probably got,

went a little bit further

than I would have liked them to.

Again, I was telling,

joking to people that I

think I'm a really good

story for him to tell his friends.

Like, you know,

that he did some things

with an older woman.

So that was that.

And after that, he backed off.

It was super awkward.

Like for the first couple of

days of that week,

like he backed off and then

Like I was like, fuck,

like I shouldn't have done that.

And then like,

I backed off a little bit too.

And then he started like

coming around again,

like the following weekend.

And I made a comment like, Hey, you know,

if I hadn't reached out to you, like,

would you have even texted me back?

And he's like, Oh my God,

of course I would like blah, blah, blah,

whatever.

And so that's kind of what I told him.

I was like, you know, I said,

I don't think this is going to work.

Like I'm too old for you.

You need to find somebody younger.

I'm like, I want to be your friend.

Like, I think you're fun and cool, but,

I don't think it's a match.

And he was like, OK, I totally understand.

That's fine.

And then he was joking around like,

are you sure we can't just

like hang out again?

But yeah, it's cool.

So we're friends.

So me and young guy have

spoken on the phone.

You know,

we texted during like one of the

basketball games and things like that.

But other than that,

that didn't really go anywhere.

But we did get two dates in there.

All right.

That's five.

Number six.

Number six, we're going to call him.

banter guy because we have

really good banter.

Um, his name, his name, I met him,

I met him on Tinder.

Okay.

So can we just, let's start off with that.

Um,

he had one picture and like no bio at all,

just like maybe his age and

where he lived.

And I thought he was

attractive and I swiped on him.

He swiped back.

We started talking.

Um, he's a really smart guy.

Um, I'm really attracted to him.

Um, we set up time last week to go out, um,

on a Sunday for like happy hour.

We met at this bar,

we had a couple of drinks, um,

got along with him really well.

Again,

intellectual stimulation for some

reason is like such a turn on for me.

And, um, it was like

hold on, let me address this.

So yes, Caleb,

I did swipe on someone with one picture,

but he sent pictures as we

were texting back and forth.

So I saw, you know,

we saw pictures of each other.

He was very,

he was not shy about sending pictures.

Let's just leave it at that.

So that's that.

But anyway, so we had drinks,

we had a nice time.

But again, the intellectual thing,

like he made me feel like I

wasn't the smartest person

in the conversation.

Um,

and that is like such a turn on for me.

I don't want to feel like I

can talk circles around somebody or that.

Like I'm talking like way

above their grade level.

That's just, it's not fun for me at all.

So, uh, yeah, so we had a good time.

He walked me into my car.

We made out like teenagers

in the parking lot.

Um, it was amazing.

Uh, I was like, hell yeah.

Um, let's do that again.

And, um, we both went our separate ways.

Um,

the second time we met was later that

week.

I don't remember when,

but so he has a couple of different jobs.

He has like a part-time

full-time job and then he's

got some part-time jobs

that involve coaching, um, a sport.

So he was sort of like away

from his hometown coaching

this sport and he was

getting out really late

cause they were having

tryouts or something.

And he said, you know,

meet me at this place.

Um,

And it was like a complete dive bar.

And when I say complete dive bar,

like I was afraid to get

out of the car in the

parking lot before he got there.

Cause I got there before he did.

Um,

and the only reason why I traveled that

far to see him then was

because it was really late at night.

Um,

like he was getting off of his coaching

duties late at night and I

didn't want to waste time for him,

like to come to see me.

That would have like wasted

another hour of his time.

So anyway, I went up there, um, we met.

the band stopped playing

like as soon as he got there,

but he's really, he loves music.

And like, we got into the music part.

We were like singing and, you know,

kind of grooving and we had

just a great time sitting at the bar.

He was very affectionate, which I love.

Um,

we were just kind of like very handsy

with each other, not like handsy,

sexual handsy, but just, you know,

like touching arms and

knees and whatever.

Um, again,

having such a great conversation, um,

you know, we went out,

after like, he walked me to the car again,

we did a little fooling around.

It was great.

Um, and then he left.

And then the next morning, I don't know.

I just got like,

I got this weird vibe about

like the dive bar and sort

of like his demeanor over the phone.

Um, he had talked to me.

Oh, so when we met,

he had talked to me about, you know,

I asked him like,

how long have you been divorced?

He's like,

I've been divorced for two years.

And I was like, oh, you know,

and he has kids and he has

like two daughters.

One lives with him,

one goes back and forth, whatever.

And so I don't know.

I just got a vibe.

And so I sent him a text and I said,

we had been texting pretty

regularly since we met, you know,

during the day, during the work day.

And then at night, you know,

when he was done with his

coaching duties and everything else.

So I texted him the next morning.

I was like, hey,

does your ex-wife live with you?

Cause I was getting this

feeling like he only wanted

to see me late at night.

He only wanted to see me

like far away from his house.

Um, and I was like,

this just doesn't feel right.

And so he said, no, he said no.

And then he just started up

the conversation again.

Like,

like I didn't ask the question and

I'm thinking if someone

asked me that I would be like, wow, like,

why did you ask that?

Or like, what else, you know,

what are you concerned about?

I would have just

explored it a little bit more,

been a little curious and he didn't,

which of course I was like, oh shit,

here we go.

And so I said,

so then I wrote back and I said,

is she actually your ex-wife?

And I got the silent

treatment for about an hour and a half,

which was very uncharacteristic of him.

And then I got, and then I said, hello,

question mark.

And he wrote back and said, hey,

I'm really, you know,

I'm in the weeds at work.

Let me, I'll call you later.

And I said something like, oh,

that doesn't make me feel any better,

but thanks.

And then he wrote back and he's like, no,

all good.

He's like, I'll call you later.

So anyway, he didn't call me later.

I texted him again,

knowing when he was going

to be off of his other job.

And he finally did call me.

The first ten minutes of the

conversation was small talk.

Like, hey, how was your day?

Oh, how was this?

How was that?

How was practice?

How were tryouts?

You know, blah, blah, blah.

And I finally, I was like,

are we going to talk about

your marital status?

Because...

like,

that's the last thing we talked about.

And he's like, yeah.

I was like, all right, let's have it.

And he's like, I'm separated.

I'm not divorced.

And I was like, okay.

And I had all these

questions that I couldn't

really process in the

moment because I was just

pissed off that he lied.

And I said, you know,

you could have told me the truth,

like from the very beginning, because

when I was separated before I was divorced,

I was dating and I told

people I was separated.

And for a lot of people,

that was a red flag and

they wouldn't pursue me.

And that's fine because you

never know if someone's

actually going to get divorced.

I mean,

I knew I was going to actually get

divorced,

but so many other people don't do that.

And so, you know,

I had some questions like,

does she want to get divorced?

Like, are you getting divorced?

And there was just all this

back and forth about, um,

I won't go into details just

for his anonymity but there

were there were things that

he was still responsible

for financially that made

me feel very uncomfortable

and uh I was really

disappointed really

disappointed because again

like the chemistry was

amazing the banter was

really good he was you know

an accomplished guy and he

was attractive um and I up until

the lying part,

like I felt good about the

way he was treating me and, you know,

the way we were connecting

and everything else.

But anyway,

so Kayla wants to know what's

the difference between

separate and divorce.

So they lived in separate homes.

They had been living in

separate homes for a couple of years.

And he actually had, um,

he had a one-year relationship, boyfriend,

girlfriend relationship

with someone else since he met me,

like since she left the

house and since he met me.

So

He's capable of all that.

But CrossFit pretty much has it correct.

She's definitely on his insurance.

And again, but like,

just don't lie about it.

He could have said like, hey,

we've been she moved out

two years ago and we've

been separated ever since.

It's really messy.

I'm still paying for this or that and blah,

blah, blah.

But, you know,

we're going to we're working through it.

Like,

at least allow me to make a decision

whether I want to move

forward with accurate information,

because that's not the

first time this has

happened to your girl where she's been

involved with a man who said

they were divorced,

but the last time he was

actually married and living

with the woman unbeknownst to me.

So like, that's a trigger for me.

And, uh, it kind of,

I got a little bit of PTSD

and I'm thinking, Oh, here we go again.

So, yeah.

Um, so no bueno on that.

That was date number six.

So those are my six dates.

Um, what time is it?

No idea what time it is.

You know what time it is?

Okay.

We got time.

Um, yeah, I was bummed about that,

but anyway, in the meantime,

I was out with my

girlfriend a couple of weeks ago and, uh,

Tyler, he has not seen the tree,

nor does he know about the

tree and anyone that has a

problem with the tree can kiss my ass.

Um, and yes, CrossFit,

that's how you get into a fist fight.

Yep.

I'm waiting for one.

Um, anyway, so I met a guy in real life.

No, it was so exciting.

Um,

I went to this bar that I didn't want

to go to with my girlfriend

who was also single.

And there was this big

fundraiser there and I

bumped into a guy I hadn't

seen in a while.

And he was like, Hey, how's your,

how are you and your boyfriend?

And I said, oh, we broke up and he's like,

oh my God, really?

Cause my friend's here and

he just broke up with his

girlfriend and he'd be great for you.

And you guys are, you know, great,

whatever.

So he introduced me to his friend.

We talked for a little bit,

we exchanged numbers.

you know, he called,

he started calling me right away,

like the next day.

And since then,

that was like a week and a half ago,

we've been talking every day.

He took me out last Thursday.

We went out, he planned the date.

He made reservations.

It was at a grownup restaurant.

It wasn't at a bar.

We actually sat down and had a meal.

It was perfect.

Like so good.

We shared our dinners.

Like we both kind of weren't

sure what we were going to get.

And I was like, Oh, I'll get this.

You get that.

And we'll like,

you know,

switch around and everything else.

He was a complete gentleman.

Didn't try, you know, anything.

Um,

talked a little bit about his

ex-girlfriend.

They were,

they were together for like

three and a half years off and on.

It sounded this, the,

the situation sounded a

little similar to my

situation where they were

kind of on again, off again,

and then they went on a

trip and then they broke up.

And it was like exactly what

happened with me where we were on again,

off again, we went on a trip,

we broke up.

But he was about,

he's maybe a month behind me.

So I was like a month ahead

of him in life.

CrossFat wants to know who paid.

He paid.

He paid for everything.

He opened the doors.

He like, you know, was very,

very much in tune to all

that kind of stuff.

Is that a red flag to talk about exits?

So we had talked before we

went out on this date.

We spent two hours one night

talking on the phone and we

pretty much just like

verbal diarrhea about our pasts, right?

Like my marriage, the boyfriend,

his prior relationships, his family,

like the whole thing.

And it was kind of cool.

Like it was pretty mature of

both of us to just kind of

like lay it out,

lay it all out on the line.

And so that was, that was fine.

And I, you know, I was obviously,

I was like getting attached

because now we're talking every day.

And I thought he was really

sweet and super considerate.

And like the day of the date,

he texted me the morning of and was like,

hey, I'm going to be doing this,

this and this,

but I should be around like

around six thirty to get you.

Is that work for you?

And then like later on the afternoon,

he's like, hey, I just got out of work.

I'm going to do X,

Y and Z like I told you I was,

but I'm still going to be

there at six thirty.

Like and then he got done

early and called me and was like, hey,

I'm done early.

Like, can you get can you be ready sooner?

We can just go sooner and

have a drink at the bar before dinner.

It was all very attentive and

very, um, very much cool about that.

So I was really excited.

So we did that on Thursday

and then on Saturday, Oh,

and he just dropped me off,

gave me a little peck on the lips,

you know, a hug.

And that was that, um,

texting me the next morning, you know,

had such a great time, blah, blah, blah,

all this stuff.

Saturday,

he was doing something around my area.

We don't, I mean,

we don't live like in the

same neighborhood or anything,

but I knew he was going to be up here.

And he told me, he's like, Oh,

I'm headed to so-and-so to do X, Y,

and Z.

And I said, oh, well, if you, you know,

if you don't have plans, I said,

why don't you swing back

here on your way back?

Maybe we can like go to the

shooting range or like go

to lunch or something.

He's like, oh, that sounds good.

So he called me when he was done.

He said, hey, I'm, you know,

I'm just getting done now.

You know, did you want to do something?

I was like, yeah.

I said,

I'm just about to jump in the shower.

Like, why don't you just come over?

I'll leave the door unlocked for you.

You can just come in and hang out.

So he comes over.

I'm like just about getting

ready when he walks in.

We sit in the apartment for like,

I don't know,

twenty minutes or something.

I'm like getting a drink and

then he uses the bathroom.

I go downstairs and get my mail.

I come back up like it was just cool,

very casual.

And then we went to the

shooting range and we had

so much fun at the shooting range.

Like I've been to the

shooting range with other

people before and it is not fun.

Like I'm in my lane there in

their lane and we're just

like doing things.

And this was like he was shooting my gun.

He was like

teaching me like how to site differently.

And we like bought a bunch

of targets and we were doing like,

you know,

five foot headshots or five yard

headshots and then like ten

yard body shots.

And it was just fun, like very engaging.

We stayed there for a while.

So that was cool.

And then we went to lunch.

I had told him earlier that

if he came and swung by and went to lunch,

that was going to be my treat.

So

When the check came, actually,

I gave the credit card to

the waitress on my way to

the bathroom and paid for lunch.

And he was pissed about it.

He was like, I would have bought lunch.

And I was like, no, I told you that.

I told you that I would, you know,

I would cover lunch because

I invited you to go, whatever.

So we did that.

And then he was going to go

home and I was going to

watch the basketball games,

the final four up at a bar near my house.

And he was going to go to a

bar at his house.

And he he's like, oh,

you're going to go watch the games.

He's like, why don't I?

you know, I'll come watch them with you.

And I was like, Oh my God,

this is like a marathon day.

How fun.

Cause at this point I'm like,

he's my boyfriend.

And so he went home,

did whatever it came and picked me up.

We went to the bar to watch the games.

One of my friends came,

one of his friends came.

So he, he invited one of his friends.

We had a great time.

We were there from like six

until midnight.

We were eating,

we were doing all the things.

He was,

very considerate,

like pulling out the chair

for me when I would leave

or when I would come back.

He was just very attentive,

dropped me off that night.

We had, we kissed in the car and I left.

Um, that was, that was Saturday.

We talked again on Sunday.

We talked on the phone Sunday night.

Like he checks in with me,

like what he's doing, where,

whenever what's today, Wednesday.

So last night we talked on

the phone last night.

Um, I,

called him after my band practice,

because he was excited to

hear about like how the band thing went.

And we talked and then I came to bed,

no big deal.

This morning,

I get a text from him at ten thirty.

And it's like, hey,

I just want to let you know,

I think you're great,

but I'm not ready to be in

the dating world yet.

So I wanted to make sure

before like we take things

too far or feelings come about that,

that I let you know that.

He's like,

we can be friends if you want to

hang out.

I'm happy to go shooting

with you and I'm happy to do this or that,

but I'm not ready to date.

And I was like, hmm.

And so I wrote him back and I was like,

hey, to be honest with you,

I felt like this was coming

because I had two of my girlfriends,

one of them who actually knows him,

kind of warn me and be like, hey,

I just want to let you know

he's out of a long-term

relationship and he might

not be ready for something.

So who knows what that was?

But I was...

I was bummed.

And that was just today.

So here we are, guys.

Six, seven, eight,

nine dates into my single life.

I don't know what I'm doing now.

I'm sick of the dating apps.

I would love to meet someone in real life.

Part of me thinks I should

just chill out for six

months and not date anyone.

I don't know.

we'll see.

There's,

there's so much going on in my

life right now.

I'm trying to,

I'm figuring out whether I

want to like buy my house

back from my ex-husband

cause he's getting married

and right now we still own

the house together.

Um,

but our interest rate's really low and

that's kind of why we did that.

Um, but yeah,

So I think what I'm going to do next week,

here,

let's answer some of your questions here.

So what instruments do you play?

So I'm the lead singer, Trish.

I do not play instruments.

I do know how to play the piano,

but I know like four songs

that I learned when I was probably,

you know,

seven or eight years old when my

mom sent me to the

Wilmington School of Music to play piano.

And we do need a keyboardist.

So I don't think I can do

double duty on that.

It's just enough for me to

like try to be entertaining

and remember all the words to the songs.

that I'm singing for now.

So that'd be good.

Craig says, stay positive.

Yeah.

Caleb,

I have the feeling the band is going

to be huge.

I mean, the band's going to be fun,

but let's face it.

We are going to be,

we're going to be playing some dive bars.

This is an eighties band, right?

The guys,

Tony's talking to me about like

the promo pictures that

they want to take.

And he's like, yeah,

we're all going to get into

our members only jackets

and our sunglasses.

And, you know,

you could like wear leg warmers or,

you know, do like a Madonna thing.

And I'm thinking, oh, dear God,

that's not my style at all.

I don't know about that,

but we'll have to see what

kind of a costume I can put

together for the eighties band.

I don't want to be in costume really.

Like it's bad enough that we

have to sing eighties songs all the time.

But yeah, we'll see.

So CrossFat wants to know if

I can keep the mortgage.

Trish says she can buy out

his equity and keep the mortgage.

Yeah.

So here's the deal with that.

If the loan was assumable,

I could get him off the

mortgage and we could keep

our two point seven five

interest rate on the

mortgage because we

refinanced in like twenty twenty.

Our loan is not assumable.

Assumable loans are usually

like military loans or like FHA loans,

which we don't have either of those.

So

the what I have to do is I

have to refinance and I

have to pay him the equity

that's in the home.

So I'm going to end up owing

him like probably a buck fifty.

And that's not a dollar fifty,

but that's one hundred

fifty thousand dollars to do that.

But the new rates like six, seven, five.

So I think my mortgage

payment is going to go from

two thousand dollars to

thirty five hundred dollars like

in a heartbeat.

But that's only if he's getting married.

See, cause here's what I'm nervous about.

Like if he gets married,

he's on the mortgage,

I'm on the mortgage.

If he now becomes part of a

marriage with some other woman,

does this other woman have

a claim to the house?

Like, I don't know how that works.

And I kind of don't want to

be in that situation.

So I'm sort of like waiting

for him to let me know when

the wedding is.

Cause they keep moving the date around.

Like it was going to be January.

Now it's July, I think.

So it's like sooner than later.

So I'm kind of waiting to

figure out when that is.

My lease isn't up here until

August and I'm paying two

thousand dollars a month

for this apartment.

So I wanted to all kind of

work out timing wise so

that I'm not paying fifty

five hundred dollars in any

given month to live somewhere.

So we'll see.

We'll see what we do there.

But we could sell the house.

My kids.

That's the house my kids

grew up in and my kids are

not up and out yet.

Like they're in college,

but they still come home.

for holidays and things like that.

They're twenty two and nineteen.

So I was thinking I would suck it up and,

you know,

pay the extra money for a couple

of years until they're up

and out and then I could sell.

And there will still be a

lot of equity in the home

that if I did sell it,

I'd get some money out of it.

CrossFit says marriage may

be a major life event in the mortgage.

Yeah,

I wish I've talked to plenty of

mortgage brokers, unfortunately.

And yeah, damn,

he got on the horse pretty quick.

Yeah.

And he started dating his

fiance the same time I

started dating Mike.

So they're,

they're going on about two years now.

Um,

but it's funny because it took him

three years to propose to

me when we were young.

So, uh, he's, he's a little closer,

you know, Trish,

funny you say that maybe

you're going to date with the mortgage.

The guy that has our mortgage,

I think is kind of cute, but, um,

I don't know.

You guys want to see dating app photos?

I don't know if I can show them to you.

Oh, maybe I can.

Let's see here.

I'm going to go.

Oh, no, I don't think I can.

Oh, yeah, I can.

All right.

Okay.

I'm going to go straight to hell for this.

Hold on.

Let me see if I can share my

screen how I do this.

Present.

Present.

Present.

What do I want to present?

Share screen.

What screen do I want to share?

This window.

All right, guys,

we're going to go on Bumble

and see what happens.

Okay.

So these are people that

come up in my feed based on my filter.

I'm swiping live here.

I hope I don't get kicked off of things.

Trish wants to know, am I Italian?

My hair is a hundred percent.

I am Italian.

I'm half Italian.

I'm also English.

My hair, I've been losing my hair.

My hair has been coming out.

I don't know why, but thank you.

My hair is like my best feature,

that and my shoes.

Okay, so this is Tom.

Tom is an owner at a small business.

He's fifty eight.

Oh, oh, wait, hold on.

Shit.

I just liked him.

Damn it.

Look what you guys are making me do.

I just liked that guy.

All right.

Jason, fifty three.

I mean, what's happening there, Jason?

Biotech, jujitsu competitor.

He's in a quantum mechanics, plants,

unified field theory, music and food.

He's only five eight.

We're going to say no to that,

but we'll keep going down

and see more pictures.

Oh, he's got a dog.

He's got hair.

I mean, the bar's low, guys.

Oh, but see, he lives in Nashville, guys.

Lives in Nashville.

Yeah, you can see my profile.

Hold on.

This is Mike, owner at Small Business.

Cute dog.

Love it.

Fifty-eight's a little bit

older than what I might like.

See, he's only five-three.

High school.

This is what I'm dealing with, guys.

All right.

We're going to see.

Oh, damn it.

I did it again.

I liked him.

Oh, God.

All right.

I have to take my time here.

Take my time.

This is John.

Oh, God.

He's six to rarely drinks.

Okay.

Open to kids.

No, I don't like that mustache.

I'm sorry.

I don't like your clothes.

He's also sixty three miles away.

Okay.

So I have to go here to pass.

Michael.

Hello.

Hello, Michael.

Nice dog.

Nice beard.

Forty eight.

Fifteen years divorce.

No kids.

My own place.

Great job.

Coolest dog in the world.

I read, write, love outside.

Just had a book published.

I also own more than two pairs of shoes.

Oh, my God.

I love that.

I'm getting together a

decent wardrobe and I don't

even own an Xbox.

Hmm.

OK, Michael, he's only five, eight.

That's okay.

Your girl's only five too.

Do you like him?

Oh, see, that's a scary picture.

Dates.

I like to come up with date

ideas when I can.

And I always try to do

something either different

or spice it up.

Spice it up.

Being someone who lives in

the now and can enjoy things in life,

nothing dragged down by the bad.

Yeah, no.

See, it's so funny,

but like the first picture guys is like,

I don't know.

It's like different.

And then you scroll down and you're like,

ah, no, nevermind.

Okay.

We're passing on Michael.

Pete.

Okay.

Which one is Pete?

Do you think you think

Pete's the white guy?

We don't know.

You just moved back to

Colorado from the East coast.

Okay.

Well then you're out.

Sorry.

We're not doing Colorado.

Here's Harry.

Mind you,

these are all people that Bumble

thinks I might be interested in, I guess.

I mean,

He's going to the tennis things.

He lives in Bethesda, Maryland.

That's also too far away.

So yeah.

Oh, and see, that's it.

I'm all caught up.

Like I've already scrolled

enough that they don't have

anyone else for me.

Now I can edit my filters.

Let's see.

are my filters I'm looking

for men I'm looking between

the ages of forty six and

fifty eight and I'm looking

up to sixty seven miles

away so somebody last week

said to go to seventy so if

I go to seventy and then I

just apply this it's just

gonna give me people that

are seventy miles away and

if I close I could open

this up to like forty five

maybe go down to forty

trish I'll go down to forty

two how about that

See,

and now these guys are all cute and

adorable, but they're too young.

This is Simon.

Hi.

Oh, nothing about Simon.

He's just five, nine.

No, sorry.

Can't do Simon.

Ken.

Okay.

Hello.

Oh, by the way,

the guy that took me on the

real date that I met in

real life is only forty six.

So we're good there.

Ken, forty five again.

Nothing about Ken.

He's five, ten.

These are fake pictures.

He's too pretty.

Oh, I don't like that pose.

That's not good.

That looks weird.

Ken has a fake profile, probably.

All right, Mark.

Again, we're only going to get young guys.

So, forty-two.

Nothing about him.

He's five, eleven.

Oh, nope.

He's posing with Betty Boop.

That is a hard pass.

Okay.

John.

John's a race team driver.

I know, I am really picky.

Not looking to force

anything that doesn't come naturally.

Just here zigzagging around

the country to give myself.

What country?

What do you mean country?

Why are you, where are you from?

Where are you from, John?

Doesn't say.

So no location.

That's kind of a red flag.

Oh, he wants kids someday.

Nevermind.

Can't do that.

I'm not fertile.

Here's Eric.

No.

There's FC.

No.

All right,

you guys want to see my profile?

Can I show you my profile?

Here's my profile.

I think it's pretty legit.

So that picture's from maybe

like a year and a half ago.

That was the first trip that

Mike and I took to, what do you call it,

Asheville.

So VP, owner of bank, Jim,

University of Delaware,

in nineteen ninety four, fifty two.

My photo has been verified, right?

This is my profile.

I recently let my Mensa membership lapse.

That is a true story.

I'm a corporate girl and

CrossFit coach seeking an intelligent,

fit,

affectionate partner who has a clear

vision for the future.

If you take care of yourself,

appreciate femininity and

are ready to lead, let's connect.

I stay fit,

but love desserts because balance.

So that's my profile.

I can change this at any time,

but you're limited to the

characters you can use.

It says I'm five two.

I'm active.

I am a Pisces.

I don't

I think that matters.

I have my undergraduate degree.

I drink socially, never smoked,

which is why I used to

smoke until I was forty.

I am a woman and I'm looking

for a relationship.

My ultimate green flag is intelligence,

leadership, protection and affection.

Yes, Trish, I am in banking.

I'm going to show you all the photos,

don't worry.

Do you agree or disagree

that getting somewhere

without a navigation app is a lost art?

This is me in New York City.

last winter.

I love animals.

And this squirrel was being nice to me.

I didn't even have anything in my hand.

I was just fooling him,

but he was coming to me anyway.

That's a very recent picture, like St.

Patrick's Day.

Make me feel safe and protected.

Strengthen leadership or total turn ons.

This is where I'm trying to

get across this whole femininity thing.

I want to be somebody's

passenger princess.

I want to be taken care of.

I'm tired of

being the man in the

relationship all the time.

So I want to be the girl.

That's a great picture too.

That was in Wyoming two summers ago.

So not super recent,

but I live in Wilmington.

I have, these are my artists on Spotify,

mostly country stuff.

Cause that's what I've been

listening to lately.

Soon it will be all eighties stuff,

but yeah, that's my profile.

So I try to give like

different looks cause like

I can be like sporty girl.

I can be whatever.

Yeah.

Um, I can maybe try to show you Facebook.

Yeah.

Anyway.

All right.

Let me stop sharing.

Okay.

I'm back.

Um, Wilmington, Delaware.

Kenneth is where I live.

Um, what does this mean?

Trish?

What does trad white or Kenneth?

What does trad wife mean?

I don't know.

Map Lady says the algo

matches you based on your first pick.

So are you thinking I should

change my first pick?

Should I make it something else?

I know people like to see

like full body pictures so

that they know like what

your traditional wife role.

Yeah,

I definitely would like to play that

at some point in time.

All right, so tell me which one

If you are hidden in the pic,

it matches you with lower level people.

I'm hidden in the pic.

What do you mean by that?

So tell me which one I should use.

Like a one with my big giant

face just in frame?

Because I'm willing to do that.

Yeah,

so I canceled Tinder and I canceled

Hinge because they're just

a waste of money.

And that's what I'm doing now.

So I don't know.

I'm up for advice.

And yes, Trish, I work in banking.

My brain doesn't process

your age with the picture.

What does that mean?

What do you mean?

Which picture?

All the pictures?

So they use face symmetry to

gauge how pretty you are.

And if you do a face shot,

it will mark you higher on the list.

Full makeup.

Okay.

Damn.

Damn.

I didn't know all these things.

Do you guys like the picture

on the thumbnail that I

have where I'm sitting at

my desk right here with my knees up?

I thought that was a cute picture,

and I have makeup on in that one.

Throw in a social pic

showing you with friends.

Okay, I can do that too.

My friends and I don't take pictures,

so that's the problem.

All the pictures I have are

of me and my ex-boyfriend.

Or my kids,

which I'm not putting my kids

up there either.

If they can see your face,

it marks your lower niche.

Got it.

Okay.

I will give that a try and

we will see next time what happens.

So here's the deal.

We're over the hour mark.

So we're going to throw this out.

A couple of questions for you guys.

Do I need an intro?

I don't have an intro.

You know,

Scott has all those intros for the show.

If you think I need one, let me know.

Maybe someone can make me one.

That's cute.

That's order of business number one.

Number two, in the comments, songs,

early nineties songs can

sing with an alto voice.

That's what I'm looking for.

What else?

What else?

What else?

I guess that's it.

Next week,

we are going to do my perfect guy.

That's the theme.

I'm going to share with you

guys what my criteria is

for if I can build a guy

like weird science style.

what we're going to do.

And then, you know,

I'll update you on if I've

gone on any more dates or, you know,

if banter guy enters the picture again,

cause you never know.

I'm a sucker for intelligent, cute guys.

We'll see what happens.

All right.

I hope you guys have a great night.

Thank you so much for

listening and joining in the chat.

That was fun.

Are the DMs open?

What do you mean?

Does that mean on Instagram?

Yeah.

Can you, do you guys see my thing?

Hold on.

That's my Instagram cat CrossFit coach.

Um, flood them, flood them.

Yeah.

Let me know what you want to do,

what you want to see,

what you want to hear.

If we need an intro, um, suggestions on,

if you guys see a picture

on Instagram that you think

I should put in my thing,

I'll do that too.

But yes, the dating apps cost money.

Bumble costs money.

All of these, um,

the free versions just kind

of suck and you don't get a

whole lot out of them.

So I figure if I'm going to do it,

I might as well invest.

So we'll see what happens on

Bumble in another week.

But also let me know in the

comments about the time.

So we can either do

Wednesdays at five forever.

That works for me.

Or I was thinking about

doing Tuesday nights at eight.

Either one I'm totally cool with,

but I want you guys to be able to join.

So it's way more fun when

you guys can be around.

All right.

I am now going to go down

and have a drink of wine

with a guy that almost hit

me yesterday in my parking lot.

We actually go to the same gym.

Funny story real quick.

I'm waiting for the gym and

I'm distracted because I'm

looking over here at some

car that's pulling out and

I pull out right in front

of this guy in this white

SUV and he slams on his

horn and I stop and he doesn't hit me.

Thank God.

And I just keep going and I go to the gym.

This is on my way to

CrossFit in the morning,

which is like less than a

mile from my house.

I turn onto the highway.

He follows me.

I turn into the parking lot of my gym.

He follows me and he pulls

up right next to me.

It's Michael from the gym, from my,

from my eight AM CrossFit class.

I'm mortified.

I was like,

thank you so much for not hitting me.

I'm so sorry.

And he was so cute.

He was like,

did I run a stop sign or did

you run a stop sign?

And I was like, Oh,

I totally didn't have a stop.

I didn't,

neither one of us had a stop sign,

but I was completely in the wrong.

Thank you for not hitting me.

We ended up being partners in the workout.

He's a nice guy.

He's sixty two.

He lives in my apartment complex.

So there's that.

And there's not anything

romantic happening on my end.

And I made sure he knew that

there would be no nothing

romantic happening on his end.

But he got my number and he

asked me if he wanted to go for a drink.

And I told him that I would

go for a drink at six thirty.

So that's what I'm going to do.

I'm going to go down,

have a margarita and.

And do all the things.

But again, thanks, guys.

Love you and wish me luck.

I'll talk to you later.

Bye.

I don't know how to do this