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Reb Nosson of Breslov, the beloved disciple of Rebbe Nachman, carried his Rebbe’s light into the world with boundless devotion. Through his writings, prayers, and letters, we are given a path to live with faith, joy, and strength even in times of struggle.
In this series, Rav Shlomo Katz learns from Reb Nosson’s Torah, weaving together his fiery commitment, his guidance to his children and students, and the timeless invitation to run not away from Hashem, but toward Him. Join us in tasting the sweetness of Likkutei Tefilot, Likkutei Halachot, and Reb Nosson’s letters, and discover how his teachings still burn in our hearts today.
Okay, let's start, let's begin. בוקר טוב. יישר כוח everyone for coming. יישר כוח Miriam, thank you.
A few just brief announcements that obviously we'll have Nissan come. Hopefully Yossi will get him on time and he'll very probably, probably be here soon. We'll be very special to hear from him. We all bumped into him last night.Second of all is that we actually, some women came up to me after the men's Ukraine trip and we're discussing how what kind of another trip could be put together obviously for the women.
But women will also, some women also came up and discussed, well we don't, not only the Ukraine, can there be something else that's also here, that's more here, that doesn't have to be there. So we're putting together right now basically we've learned a lot from this past week because our ירחי כלה that we've done, which was a full-on men's program, exceeded every expectation we had. It was, I don't even know, I can't explain it. We don't understand how this happened.
We only really started working on it about two and a half weeks ago, three weeks ago. And it's just really has flowed and the the trips and the learning and the meetings with different צדיקים has been something that we're still in shock of, ממש. That's how powerful this week has been. And it is very, very clear to us that it's בזכות our wives.
That's not like even, and I'm not just saying this to you now, we talk about this while we're on these trips and while we're learning וכולי. So what we're trying, what we've been trying to do is to see from the trips that we've been doing how much of those trips can would be שייך for the women to get together and start doing them now, not in May or June when the Ukraine trip will hopefully be, but now. And one of the main, the powerful points that we had this week was going out to Ari and Jeremy's farm. Now that sounds like you go out to a farm.
It's much cooler, deeper and and whoever's been there knows what I'm talking about. We had a magical day there in the farm and a שיעור in one of the caves where דוד המלך used to sit and probably compose ספר תהילים.So it's it's just been a week of ארץ ישראל on the highest level. So that we're planning בעזרת השם in the next few weeks to have a morning. We'll get, we'll send out a mailer and figure out what works best for women to take one morning and go out there.
And we can do a learning there, we could have someone else come and teach, whatever, doesn't matter, as long as the women get together and go out there. And it's 15 minutes, 12 minutes from here. It's beautiful, gorgeous, and there's a lot going on there. And there's a lot more that will be going on there.
But to be there before it's all full with whatever they're working on, which you'll see, makes you feel like a שייכות to the place and you could say, I was there before. I was there before. So anyway, that's what we're working on right now. And all the any ideas and thoughts and whatever anyone has in mind, please share because we really want to keep the, keep this going as strong as possible.
What about קברי צדיקים here? There's so many. We yesterday we spent the day. Again, if that's the רצון of the women. Yesterday we went to רבי שמעון, we went to the אריז"ל, we went to the רמח"ל and רבי עקיבא.
That was our day yesterday. So באמת whatever it is, whatever it is, בטח. We went to הרשב"י for שבת and then after we went to the מחילה there. It was probably one of the most powerful.
יאללה, more and more of that. It was so amazing. We did ברכת הלבנה and then we gave חלות. That was already a while ago, Miriam.
It's time for, how long ago was that? September. Ilana Crohn's birthday. It was amazing though. It was spiritual, it really was.
So just more, just more and more, you know, just more and more and to try to centralize it. I told her to, I don't have to be on it. Miriam's off of the WhatsApp groups. She's done with them.All right, today is a very, very special day.
Today on many levels, a very special day. And that's why I wanted to make this day extra strong learning wise. As you all know that today the fast day of עשרה בטבת and a few very, very harsh things took place on this day. And the our leaders have called this day יום הקדיש הכללי which means basically anyone that all the lost souls and all the things that we don't even know about, we have no idea where people are buried וכולי וכולי, it all falls underneath this day.
So this day is a very, very, very powerful day. And it's דווקא like from all the fasts that we have that are not like תשעה באב and יום כיפור, this one is a very strong one. Not הלכתית, there's no differentiation between this one and the others. that are less חמור, that are more lenient, but something on a spiritual level, today is a very, very powerful, powerful day.
However, today is also the יארצייט of Reb Noson of Breslov. Today is Rebbe Nachman's student's יארצייט, the 10th of טבת. And it is what we're going to be seeing is how this, it all collides, it's all, it all comes together.Now, I saw something startling from the name of the חתם סופר, that's what I was looking in before because I wanted to, I wanted to make sure I get this right. The חתם סופר refers to עשרה בטבת, listen to this word, this word, I couldn't believe it.
I saw it late last night and I thought I was just jet lagged and tired. Didn't make sense that I could see such a thing. The חתם סופר says like this, he calls עשרה בטבת, יום הדין, יום הדין של הגאולה. What does that mean? יום הדין, bless you.
What is יום הדין של הגאולה? Meaning, it's the day where they decide in שמים if this day will, if this year will finally be the end, will finally, finally be the year of גאולה or not.Wow. It's kind of weird, no? I never saw, I never heard of this thing before. That basically, I don't know what, I have to look more inside this and I was looking for מקורות late last night and I, I couldn't really find it. I found one, my friend Daniel Venig sent me to a ספר I don't have at home.
I have to go find it in the דרשות of the חתם סופר in order to understand what that exactly means. But when I saw these words that on the day of, even, even without understanding it, if the חתם סופר says that עשרה בטבת is the יום הדין of the גאולה, and that they decide, so to speak, in שמים on this day if this will, if this will be the last שבעה עשר, last עשרה בטבת that we're fasting or not. 'Cause this would be one of the fasts, like we just said, which we just said in שיחות this morning, that'll change into a happy day. That means that this day has very, very special powers.
It's a very, very powerful day, עשרה בטבת.One of the people who completely changed my life, and it's funny because last night we, as I said those words, I laugh because last night at the end of our trip, we left the north a little bit early. We were in, we were by רבי עקיבא and the רמח"ל which, I was never there before but, but Bina told me that they, compared to what it looks like, it doesn't look anything similar. They built the place up. It is gorgeous.
Gorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous. We were, we davened מעריב by רבי עקיבא. And then we kind of, we went pretty fast, we went home as soon as we could because we found out that Rav Weinberger agreed to to say a few words at a סעודה last night in honor of Reb Nosson's יארצייט in שערי חסד. You couldn't, you can't even imagine what the scene looked like.
It's a tiny little שטיבל. It's not, it's tiny. It's about the size of just this, just this dining area, okay? The place, needless to say, people were climbing through the windows, literally standing on people's shoulders. The sidewalks were packed, they were blocking cars.
And when we got there towards the end of his words, but thank God they put a speaker outside. And I was very, very מתרגש for a lot of my חבר'ה to come and and and, listen to the captain live for the first time. It was very special for me. I got to introduce him to a bunch of חבר'ה.
It was a very interesting introducing him to Tom. That was a highlight. I'll never forget. I introduced him to רבנו תם.
That was amazing. But anyway, he, he kept on saying over and over words, Reb Nosson, you, you saved our life. You saved our life, Reb Nosson.So obviously, it was a very famous song by the band Zusha. You ממש changed my life, you ממש, it's a song about this guy named דב בער, but anyway, the whole crowd in the שטיבל starts screaming after Rav Weinberger finished speaking, רבי נתן, הייליגער רבי נתן.
You ממש changed our, saved our lives. The whole place started screaming, you ממש saved our life. Let me ask you, without even knowing anything about Reb Nosson, anything about him other than one thing that he did. How did Reb Nosson save our lives? Because you and I would not know that there was a person named Rebbe Nachman if it wasn't for Reb Nosson.
We wouldn't know. It's not me saying this, Rebbe Nachman said this. Rebbe Nachman said about Reb Nosson that if it wasn't for him, not one word of תורה would have reached us. Not one word of חזוק that keeps on saving יידן day in, day out, wouldn't have reached anybody.
So really, we owe a tremendous, tremendous debt of gratitude and הכרת הטוב to his מסירות נפש. When I said before that there was one book that really, really changed me was the book that I highly recommend. It's a big, fat one. It's basically the story of his life and it's called Through Fire and Water.
It's put out by Breslov Research Institute. It's a, it's a tremendous project that רב חיים קרמר spent years on. I highly, highly recommend it. If you want, I could definitely organize to bring in a, you know, a load of them and sell them, probably at discount prices.
But if you can get it on your own, it's ממש כדאי to see what a person went through. What does it mean that someone believes in the תורה of his רבי? רב נתן was, was was was hunted down, not just by מתנגדים, by other חסידים, they tried to kill him. He he he went through he ממש went through hell. Hell.
Didn't have a simple life at all. And, today what we're going to be seeing, ממש it's already a quarter to ten. It's already ten to ten. Just briefly, I want to do something special in honor of עשרה בטבת, in honor of רב נתן's יארצייט and in honor of the theme of what our יארצייט כלה has been which has been תורת ארץ ישראל.
As you know, רבי נחמן gave רב נתן very clear orders to do certain something specific. And he told them, every time I teach, make a תפילה out of what I teach. Make a prayer of the תורה that you learned. When you make a prayer over the תורה that you learned, the תורה that you learned, וידעת היום, the תורה that you learned, וידעת היום, והשבות אל לבבך.
The תורה that you learned goes into your heart when you דאווען over it. We tried this one time in our חבורה this last summer when we spent the summer learning the מצוה of אהבת ישראל. We spent three weeks learning basically, mainly the צמח צדק's teachings on the מצוה of אהבת ישראל. And on a level of דעת, we learned a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot.
The last week we were learning, I said okay, חבר'ה, now you want to see if it was real or not? I'm putting each of you on the spot, taking you each out of your comfort zone. I want you to write a תורה based on what we learned. I write, sorry, write a תפילה. Write a prayer based on what we learned.
And it wasn't to then take it and show it to anybody because the booklet is ממש very, very thin if you've seen it. But the point was that they should experience a full picture of תלמוד תורה when it becomes, when you connect תורה and תפילה together, what happens? There's a very famous saying, they say it in Breslov too by another one of the משפיעים in Breslov. And his name was Rabbi Levi Yitzchak Bender. He was the leading figure of Breslov חסידות in ארץ ישראל after World War II.
And he said he brings the פסוק, it says, טובים השנים מן האחד. I think it's from, is that from משלי? Does anyone know it by heart? Can you just say it again? טובים השנים מן האחד. It's better two than than than, it's together than one on its own. So he said that's, that that that is reference to תורה and תפילה.
טובים השנים מן האחד, he said. It's always better when you put תורה and תפילה together than when each of them are on their own. But when you put them together, when you learn and you דאווען over what you learned, there's nothing else. הלוואי we had the guts that every time we finished learning, we did a little prayer.
That's why Miriam, I was so inspired when you one, one שיעור you did do some form of that after שיעור where you got the חבר'ה dancing. That was like, I thought you were kidding in the beginning. I really did. No, she doesn't kid.
No, I, I know she doesn't kid. That's nothing. No, I mean that that's an element of taking the דעת and making it into something. It's really what רבי נחמן was telling רב נתן to do.
So, one of the, one of my favorite ספרים that I hope everyone has here is ליקוטי תפילות. It's basically the book that רב נתן composed based on each teaching in ליקוטי מוהר"ן, there's a, there's a prayer. In fact, Breslov Research put out a beautiful composition of it in English, the the the תפילות that are שייך for women. דוקא all the תפילות in ליקוטי תפילות by רב נתן that are שייך for women, they put it together two years ago.
Do you remember what it's called? Do you remember, remember he brought it over one day? Yeah, between me and you. Between me and you. Right. It's not that big, right? It was like.
No, it's not too big. Right. Between me and you. No, it's transcribed.
They're working on it. It is in four volumes already. Right, right. No but this is this is specifically just for women's thing.
What I wanted What I wanted to do today is to look at one תפילה of רב נתן about ארץ ישראל. And we're going to learn basically what we're going to be דאווענען for the next few months, more or less. It's a big תפילה. Hey, if today they decide that today is going to be the day where they decide if the גאולה comes or not, then today's the day to get it together.
Can I just add one thing please? Of course. My niece and her friend just made עלייה yesterday. No way. Both are ברסלב lovers.
Oh, wow. It is like, we hopped it, so perfect. Oh, wow. Can't even believe it.
Can I say something very, very, well, first of all, מזל טוב, ברוכים הבאים. We've never learned רב נתן here. This is usually a different שיעור. I promise you.So, this is usually רב קוק on Thursdays, so not that there's any difference between the two of them.
Right. A little shocked, but not really. What's your what's your name? So afraid to go out there. Where'd you make עלייה from? Lincoln, Nebraska.
Wow, that's that's עלייה. That is עלייה. Wow. Where do you live? Here? In my house.
Oh, okay. בעזרת השם. Wonderful. Right, it should be filled, it should be filled with מזל and everything should go smooth and good.
Just good, and it should surround the the move. Wow. Does everyone have? Bonnie, do you have? You have, right? You have one of these? סליחה מרדכי? Uh, yeah.Okay. Wow.
That's very inspiring. That's very, no, not just the עלייה, but the location and where. Amazing. Wow.
And you're exhausted? Yeah. If it wasn't for רבי נחמן, I would've never made תשובה. Wow. No way.
Well, if it wasn't for רב נתן, you wouldn't, right. Okay. I hope, I really hope that this, that this trip to the Ukraine happens for the women for many reasons, but one main one is that the one of the most exalted moments we have every year happens in the same place. And that's by רב נתן's grave.
Because what happens there, you have to walk up a mountain, ממש, you walk up, now they put stairs. You walk up this mountain and it's all green and lush and it's right in front of a massive, huge river, the Bug river. So you hear the water, you hear the stream. You're in the, you're in the, you're in green and you get up to the top of the mountain and it overlooks the city of ברסלב, exactly where רב נחמן and רב נתן used to walk around.
The the, the river where they טובל actually, which we couldn't believe that anyone goes into that those freezing waters. Two guys from the trip actually did jump into the water right when we came down. יאקי, he told you. Not שמעי, יאקי and בנימין Simon walked in and they said that when they came out, they they were dry instantly because that's how cold it, meaning it just froze off very fast off their bodies, the the water.
And this what this is how this is how רב נחמן used to go and טובל all the time. Okay.So this is based on a teaching in ליקוטי מוהר"ן. It's based on a teaching on פרשת שלח. It's based on three words.
It's based on three words that the מרגלים said that we're still trying to figure out how to fix. Where it said they come back and they say ארץ אוכלת יושביה היא. That it's a land that devours its inhabitants. So everyone looked at, looks at those words and always said, ugh, look what, look how they talk about ארץ ישראל.
It's a land you get swallowed up there. And there are people that come here and very much could identify with that and feel that. Right? We're not here to pretend that here this is this is now that you're here, oh, it's all easy and smooth. Now the opportunity to be alive is available, but now we need new כוחות, different different מוחין of ארץ ישראל.
But רב נחמן said in ליקוטי מוהר"ן that just like the טבע של המזון מתהפך למזין, just like when a person eats something, that which he eats becomes part of him, right? So too, ארץ ישראל, it's a privilege to get swallowed up in ארץ ישראל and that you should become part of ארץ ישראל and that ארץ ישראל should become part of you. It's a privilege to be eaten up and swallowed up by a צדיק that you get close to. And so too with everything should be קדושה. It's not that you get consumed by it and devoured by it and you.
cease to exist, it's that it's a privilege to be consumed by it and devoured by it, and that that becomes you and that you become it. So when רב נתן is speaking about here about דאווענען over that תורה, look how, look at these words. ותזכני מהרה לבוא לארץ ישראל בשלום בלי פגע. Please, רבונו של עולם, I should merit to come to ארץ ישראל in peace, בלי פגע, without injury, ובאמונה שלמה.
And that when I come here also, I come also באמונה שלמה. And what do you think that means? To come with אמונה שלמה to ארץ ישראל?You know, I'm not gonna ask anyone else but you today for for just obvious reasons. What does it, what what, what's the אמונה like right now? Here? As you, as you, as you came into ארץ ישראל. The אמונה.
I just left with השם. I said השם, let's go. We're going. And just, and people said I was crazy and I just said I'm walking with השם.
We're getting on the plane and I'm going with השם. Everybody tried to talk me out of it. And I went with השם. Wow, באמונה שלמה.
I'd say that's that's a pretty good definition. Yeah. באמונה שלמה. ולהתקרב, רב נתן says, and when I'm here, I want to get close ולהידבק בצדיקים אמיתיים.
And I should come close to the true צדיקים. That's why I know a lot of the חבר'ה here in אפרת aren't used to some of the stuff that we're doing because we're hanging out by a lot of צדיקים. It's not something I grew, in the, you know, in the modern orthodox world that I grew up in. I mean, once in a blue moon we saw a גדול.
And it didn't really mean that much, it was just like, okay, to say your mother's, remember your mother's name in Hebrew. That's all you had to remember, right? So you make sure you say your name.We spent time this week by a צדיק who in his room, it's just it's complete light. I don't know how to describe it any other way. And that's by רבי יעקב מאיר שכטר.
Did you did you hear of him before? רבי יעקב מאיר שכטר, anybody? Did you, הודא and ארי come with us last time to see him? I think he did. Did ארי come with us last time? I think he did. I think so. אלי came a bunch, right? He came last time and this time.
I don't know how to describe this, this, I don't know how to describe it, but it's such an important thing to be דבוק to תלמידי חכמים, to the big צדיקים, to the צדיקים אמיתיים. בדבקות גדול, with tremendous דבקות, with tremendous clinging, getting close to them. ועל, and then רב נתן says, ואל תעש עמי כחטאי. and with me don't, don't do a מידה במידה situation with me.
Now, it's so funny to hear רב נתן say, please don't act with me in accordance to my עבירות. because we could just imagine, you know, what he was referencing to, what he was thinking about his עבירות, like, I only did התבודדות for three hours today, you know, or something like that. I'm sure he felt, whatever, everyone has their פעקעלעך, but like, you know, put things into proportion. However, that's how he felt.
And he spoke about it a lot. He felt very small. And he always said that when it came to ארץ ישראל, he never wanted his own פעקעלעך, his own חשבון to be that which like closes off the opportunity and the privilege of really grasping ארץ ישראל, of really taking ארץ ישראל in.So he says, ואל תעש עמי כחטאי. and I hear there's a typo and I don't know what the middle word is here.
I'll have to look at it afterwards. ותחמול עליי. Have, have compassion on me. Like we say Friday night, והוא יחמול עליי חמלה.
Have compassion on me בחמלתך הגדולה. תדינני כמפעלי. תדינני כמפעלי. like, like judge me in accordance to how how hard I'm what I'm trying to do, what I'm working on.
ותזכני ברחמיך. Merit me through your, through your רחמים. ותפתח לי שערי האמונה הקדושה. Now these, this sentence and the next one, actually, this is the intro to what he's really trying to say.Usually when I talk about אמונה, I always say to myself, I judge my thoughts, I judge myself.
that either I feel it or I don't feel it. Either I'm מאמין or I'm not מאמין. But רב נתן opened up the game and said, what do you mean when you don't feel it, that's the moment to ask השם for אמונה. Why do we think it's either you have it or you don't? And then what happens to us mentally, how we judge ourselves based on wondering whether we have have it or we don't.
Am I, am I fooling everyone? I wear, for a woman, I wear, I dress a certain way, I send my kids to a certain school, I speak a certain way. Am I fooling everyone if I don't always feel it? If I don't always feel like I ממש believe? So רב נתן says that's at that moment when that הרגשה comes up, that's basically an invitation to ask השם. To ask השם for אמונה. But wait a second, but don't I have to have אמונה in order to ask השם for something? That's the trick here, right? And רב נתן says, don't worry how much you believe, ask השם to give you אמונה.
But you we usually say to ourselves, but wait a second, that's a catch-22. How can I ask if I don't really believe? רב נתן says, don't worry, you'll figure that one out afterwards. Because that basically dissipates and it goes away, once you realize how much you really do believe. We all realize all the time we really do believe.
It's just that it's hard. Life's hard. It's not that we don't believe, it's that life gets hectic and life gets busy. But our שורש, our נשמות? Of course we believe.
All the time. So רב נתן and if רב נתן's asking this, we can ask this all the time. ותפתח, look what he says here, ותפתח לי שערי האמונה הקדושה. Open up for me the gates of holy אמונה.
And don't just open up those gates, תעזרני לכנוס לתוך האמונה באמת. Help me now walk into those gates that you opened up for me באמת, with truth. And now he says, ולהיכלל בתוכה בכלליות גדול. You know what להיכלל בתוכה means? To...
Does anyone want to give it a shot? ולהיכלל בתוכה? to be completely in it? Right, like encompassed. Yeah. I'm completely, I'm completely in it. ולהיכלל בתוכה בכלליות גדול, which means with tremendous level of encompassing.
So here the שאלה is like this. When was the last time you could say, can we say about a certain מצווה that we have that we've been completely absorbed by it and that we're that all of the all of me is completely נכלל in a מצווה? So on a physical level, there's only three מצוות that you could say that about. סוכה, מקווה, and ארץ ישראל. That's why what's very uh, what's very, very cool is that my sister-in-law's here today, and they used to live in their previous apartment right next to a, there was a tiny little מקווה that over it they put a סוכה in ארץ ישראל, so it was like נכלל שבנכלל שבנכלל.
But those are the three things that you could say, okay, that's physically. But that's not what we're asking, obviously. I don't expect everyone to now figure out how to build a מקווה and around סוכות time to put a סוכה on it and have consciousness of ארץ ישראל. But on a, on a לממש, on a on a מחשבה level, has there been a מצווה that or a ספר or something that you could say that you were fully absorbed in it in a healthy way? So that's something we דאווען for.
Please let me be completely... Tanya, you heard what I was talking about you, the מקווה? The the סוכה מקווה? Right outside your old house? With צבי, צבי built it, right? So what, so what what what is it? What what what kind of ענין do we have here? רב נתן says when I come to ארץ ישראל, let me be swallowed up by ארץ ישראל. Not in the way that מס הכנסה and ביטוח לאומי swallow us up, but in the way on the way that we really longed for before we when we were dreaming about ארץ ישראל, when we were in גלות, when we were dreaming about it. And now we're here, let me, let us be completely ממש בכלליות גדול, completely absorbed by it.
עד שאזכה, look at these words from רב נתן, I love it. עד שאזכה להיות נאכל להאמונה. Until I I'm privileged to become eaten up by the אמונה that I have. I want to be eaten up by the אמונה that I have.
I want that to absorb me. Like we're always scared to lose our the real me, right? I don't want to lose my identity. I don't want to lose the real me. Meanwhile, you spend your life never discovering who that real you is, as long as you say, \"I don't want to lose it.
I don't want to look too פרום or...\" רב נתן's saying, what do you mean? I'm please, show me who the real me is because the real me of a יהודי that comes discovered when become when you allow yourself to be completely devoured by אמונה. ארץ ישראל is a place of activity. So if you're sedentary like יושבה, then you'll get you enough. But constantly growing and moving and developing yourself then...
The opposite. Who, that's that's your תורה? No, I... Oh it's great, it's a great תורה. It's a great תורה.Right.
Keep, right. יושב means like, I can't, I have an illusion of who the real me is, so I can't really walk anywhere or move anywhere or grow anywhere. I'm sitting where I am and don't, don't take it away from me. That's what you're kind of מכוון to, right? But really with אמונה there's never a שלב in life that I say I've grown enough.
No one ever says that. In a world of, a life of אמונה, no one ever says I grew enough. There's always more and more and more. Let me be swallowed up by the concept of יש עוד.
And then he says, וליהפך למהותה הקדוש. I want to be transformed into the essence of what the what this אמונה that I'm that I'm that I'm davening for. למהות קדושת, I want to become part of the מהות קדושת ארץ ישראל הקדושה. I want to become part of the essence of the holiness of ארץ ישראל.
ולמהות קדושת הצדיקים אמיתיים. And I also want to become part of the essence of the holiness of the true צדיקים. What do you think that means? To become part to be transformed into the essence of the צדיקים אמיתיים. That I don't I don't feel foreign when I'm by them.
I don't feel like an outsider. I don't feel like I'm that guy that just got dressed up and put on a שבת clothes during the week and feeling like an outsider when I go see a צדיק. I want I want the real me to feel at home amongst absolute קדושה. I want to feel at home in those moments.
I don't want to feel like an outsider. I want to become part of its essence.And now he says something that many people have unfortunately gone through, ולא תקיא אותי הארץ. That the land should not vomit me out, literally. Should not spit me out, should not throw me up.
The land, there's a whole ענין. People sometimes feel like they're they're chucked out of here. Where does it come from? So the Torah says ולא תקיא הארץ אתכם. It's `לשונות` from the Torah.
The Torah that the Torah itself says, if you really act בדרך הישר, ולא תקיא הארץ אתכם, the land will not spit you out. But we've had so many instances in our lives and in Jewish history where on a כלל and on a פרט we've been like, הקיאו אותנו החוצה. Or at least we felt like that. We've then we've lived here for many years but we still feel like I'm here but I'm not really here.
כי הארץ באמת מקיאה אותי החוצה because the land is spitting me out. רב נחמן says he knows that that's a concept, that's a possibility, and therefore, if I'm swallowed up by my אמונה and if I'm swallowed up and devoured by the קדושה of the land, that's what I'm conscious of while I'm here and by the צדיקים אמיתיים that I'm here, that's what I'm conscious about, then the land won't spit me out. ולא תקיא אותי הארץ והאמונה הקדושה, כאשר קרה את הגוי אשר מלפני.ואף על פי שאיני כדאי וראוי ליגע באמונה הקדושה. Now רב נחמן gets very humble, because he always does.
And even though I'm not worthy to touch the concept of holy אמונה, ובארץ ישראל הקדושה, and I'm not worthy of the קדושה of the holiness of ארץ ישראל. I'm not worthy להתקרב לצדיקים אמיתיים. I'm not worthy to come close to the holy צדיקים. Why? כי הראותי את מעשיי מאוד.
Because on an action level, I've been I've been שוואך. הראותי את מעשיי means my actions have become רע. This is just another language in a different way of using the language in Hebrew. וקפחתי את קדושתי.
Does anyone know what כיפוח means? Neglect. I've neglected my holiness. קפחתי את קדושתי. I've neglected my holiness.
And I wanted to talk about this for a second, דווקא today, because today is a big day of תפילה. Today is a big day of קדושה. The neglection of קדושה. What does it mean to neglect your own holiness? I want to hear what what you have to say.
What does it mean to neglect your קדושה? Maybe it's not believing in yourself enough? That's for sure part of it. That that we're chosen. Like if you're chosen and השם decided that we are the ones, so who are are we to be questioning? So say it a little bit stronger. So who are you really doubting? השם.
You said it really good. If we're chosen, who are you then? It's גאווה to think that קדושה isn't for you. You're questioning השם. So when you neglect קדושה or the when when it doesn't just mean you're the opportunity to do a מצוה here and there, but you neglect this feeling of I'm not worthy, I'm not really who it's I'm sorry but If you decided that you're holy and chosen, then you really have issues, but if it wasn't you.
That's how משה, that's when, it's amazing thing. When it talks about the קדושה of אהרון הכהן, so also משה רבינו was was wanted to make sure that אהרון הכהן would be okay with with משה being appointed the leader and not אהרון. So השם says to משה רבינו, don't worry, don't worry. וראך ושמח לבו.
He's going to see you and he's going to get very happy in his heart. Because when it comes to אהרון הכהן, he lives on a level of אשר בחר בו. You think אהרון הכהן had an easy time walking around being the כהן הגדול? So how did he have an easy time being a כהן הגדול? Because it wasn't his choice. And he lived with that consciousness all the time.
But we כיפוח קדושה sometimes, we neglect holiness when we get confused in this in this matter. That's very good, that's one way of looking at it. How else can you take the concept of neglecting קדושה? What else would you say? I would say if you're not congruent with your רצון השם, if you don't connect to the צדיקים and the land and the the ability to be a true ייד, like your own essence. So on a on a practical level, give me an example.
I think that when you're confronted by people who may not be conscious of their being a ייד, and you need to express yours without blowing them away by it. You have to have a balance and you want to be congruent with your inside and outside and be able to express that. So you neglect it by? You neglect it if you don't, if you're not congruent and you're not your true essence and you're having a connection with רצון השם, right? And that's בית מקדש מעט within all of us. יפה מאוד.
Awesome. Thank you for sharing. Yeah. Also to realize we're the children of the king in the humblest sense of being צניעות and all our actions and you know, in a humble way but not only physically צניעות but in our actions and in our mindset.
Just the way we talk, the way we think, the way we look. Where else could you find, where else could you find כיפוח של קדושה? כיפוח של קדושה. Neglect of holiness. Where else? There's one thing I'm thinking specific, but that that's just for me to think about.
What what else could there be? Where do you think a neglect in the realm in the area of holiness? Isn't it anybody who goes off the דרך? Well, for sure. But that that they are? Or that our not helping them is a כיפוח. I thought you said that it means abandoning your own. That was that was the first, that was just, I'm sorry what's what's your name? זהבה.
That's what זהבה said, sorry. And that's absolutely לגמרי it, but that was one שלב. So what else? After that for sure it's off the דרך, but I'm saying in in now in details right now. I think כיפוח של קדושה could mean that I neglect things that I don't really I don't attribute holiness to.
Like throwing garbage on the floor. That's a very big, I was thinking more about children, but yeah. They throw garbage on the floor. This is our כיפוח של קדושה without a shadow of a doubt.
You see the land, it's amazing that the קדושה levels, כיפוח של קדושה here goes up much more than in חוץ לארץ because every pebble is filled with, you know. Every everything is like basically, that's why רבי נחמן's saying like, oh, I'm דאווענען to go to the place where everything is holy, I need to make sure that I haven't neglected anything that's holy within me. The last thing I was thinking about, כיפוח של קדושה. When was the last time that we just sat around in the midst of chaos in the house? Not after the kids are שלאָפן and you're looking at how cute they are on your phone.
I'm saying while it's happening, while it's happening, or even not chaos. nothing, nothing extraordinary is happening. And you're just sitting there, and it's, you're like, wow. Oh my God.
We neglect, we neglect moments like, that those moments could happen every single day. You don't have to become a huge צדיק, you know, amazing person to, it's neglecting moments of awareness of קדושה. This is, I just, I have this. Not are they good, are they bad? Am I a good parent, am I a bad parent? It exists.
Why? Because of what Zahava said, Hashem chose to give you, to give you. Hashem chose to give you a family. Hashem chose to give you children. And just because Hashem chose to give it to you, who are you to neglect moments of awareness that this is holy, just because it is? So that was when I saw this word, because I never, I never ever saw anyone speak like this.
וקיפחתי את קדושתי. I definitely never saw a צדיק speaking like this. I neglected my holiness.אף על פי כן, ברחמיך הרבים, הרבים מאוד. Nonetheless, even though I've neglected my holiness, Rav Natan says, זכני ברחמיך, merit me in your true רחמים, ועזרני והושיעני, help me and send me salvation, שתוכל האמונה הקדושה לסבול אותי בתוכה.
These words are crazy. These are crazy words. For Israelis, and but Israelis might get confused with this because it's not what you, it's not it's not what you think it means necessarily. What does it mean, what does לסבול mean? Tolerate.
Well, that's the exactly, that's the thing. לסבול אותי means, well I'm not סובל אותך, but we know what that means, right? I don't, to carry me. What's that? This is to carry me. This is like the סבל.
This is like tolerate me but on the level of like pick me up, have patience for me. Have patience for me. לסבול אותי. It's not meaning like שתוכל האמונה הקדושה.
Now who, who's אמונה הקדושה? That which he davened to have. So what is he basically asking Hashem? And it ties to ארץ ישראל. Please learn, please teach me how to have patience for myself. That's what he's saying.
He's saying the land, and it's a, it's a קשר to another תורה. ארץ ישראל brings out in you the only the best. But the road to only the best, the road to only the best passes through a very important concept and it's called patience. It's called סבלנות.
Okay. This, right. This, this disgusting hand movement, right? Because it's funny, this never generated a feeling of, oh yeah, pleasant waiting, you know? Someone once told me that in Hebrew there's two ways to tell someone to wait. One is סבלנות or תמתין.
But המתנה comes from the word מתנה. You see if you have the ability to do this, then the process becomes a gift. What is he referring to over here? This land, and you could ask anyone here, it, it's something, in America, it things just, it's very bizarre, it just works, and you feel like, not just because like I, like I said the other day, like you get into your car, these days you don't even have to, it just starts, right? You start driving, you go, you don't have to get out of the car to get Starbucks, you go through a drive through. Everything just works.
You, you, you say, Alexa, kosher food, and there's kosher food at your, meaning, it doesn't, but but what don't you have to, what will you not learn from a process of living like that? Patience. You, yeah, nothing. So here, none of that exists. None of that like instant, it just doesn't work.
And it doesn't, but there's there's a, you have to remember this, ממש, because it's very, very important. And we, I've been here since 1989. I have to remember, you know, I have to remember this every single day as well. That Rav Natan's saying שתוכל האמונה הקדושה לסבול אותי בתוכה ולהחזיק אותי תמיד, that the אמונה הקדושה, that this holiness, that I should be, I should be devoured in it.
I should become, I don't know how to even describe it even better, but that the fact is here I learn how to have patience for myself. And it's a, it's a gruel, sometimes it's a grueling procedure. I mean, that, that's a, that's, that's the real work. You know, when we were traveling to the Ukraine, so the worst part of the trip was always the same trip once we get to Uman.
It's always like this. Once we get to Uman, it's the worst. It's because every type of creation that ever existed is always there. The משוגעים of all משוגעים are always there.
And it makes it very hard to connect and feel like you just feel so whacked out and so not connected and so not understanding what's going on, וכולי וכולי. But we always, we always remind ourselves when we're there, it's because the Rebbe, what does the Rebbe? What does Rebbe Nachman do? What does he force you to connect to? To those things that are the hardest to do. And what's that? To have patience for yourself. And you're not going to have patience for yourself if you catch yourself not having patience for others.
So when Reb Noson's talking about if I'm דאווענעןing to come to ארץ ישראל, I'm not דאווענעןing that I should privilege to just get on a plane and come here. That's one thing. But I'm דאווענעןing that I should live here and I should be here for real. And that's what he wanted his whole life.
That's what Rebbe Nachman wanted his whole life as well. עד אשר אהיה נאכל, until, Reb Noson says, I'm דאווענעןing for this to happen, עד אשר אהיה נאכל until I become, I mean, I don't know what other way to say this besides eaten up, ונהפך למהות קדושת האמונה באמת. And that I become, I become part of the essence of what holy אמונה is for real. So, a friend of mine put out a book recently, Akiva Gersh.
I don't know if you've seen this book. You have it? So what is it? Basically, you want to give a, you want to explain what this book is? It's just different people who blog writing their stories about their עליה. Right. And some of it is more spiritual, and some of it is, some of it is more just like, Some of it is very funny.
Right. Well, we've all gone through. It's stuff we've all gone through. I forgot what it's called.
It's it's great. It's called Becoming Israeli. Oh, wow. Becoming Israeli.
You know what's so funny? Because I always wanted to change that term, because I believe that when you make עליה, you become Jewish. Because none of us really, like, are you, are the aspirations you have for your children to become Israeli, דוקא? It's to become a Jew that lives in ארץ ישראל, right? Whatever, putting that aside. But what Reb Noson is saying over here is that if he had to write his, you know, his blog or take the blog of the צדיקים that he knew, that kind of blog of coming to ארץ ישראל, so what's that blog going to be all about? You know? And I didn't have patience for myself with that person. And I lost it there.
And I flicked off that person in the, you know, when they cut me off for the 15th time and, and the cashier and the the bank and the mail and all these things. But it was all out of love. And yet, right, but and yet, I was aware of a process that I was in. And that's what we were giving you a big ברכה today.
And we're blessing ourselves back that while we're going through the process, that ה' is giving us the greatest gift in the world, שאני יכול לסבול את עצמי. That I could tolerate myself, that I could stand myself. When it comes to leaving Egypt, the first שלב of גאולה, remember there's four stages: והוצאתי, והצלתי, וגאלתי, ולקחתי. So we learned this many times, obviously, remember the אישביצער תורה? It says, והוצאתי אתכם תחת סבלות מצרים.
That's how it's, that's the first שלב of redemption. והוצאתי אתכם תחת סבלות מצרים. I took you out from the, the the literal translation is the סבל, the the the pain of Egypt, לסבול, the tortures of Egypt. But the אישביצער said like this: והוצאתי אתכם, the first שלב of redemption is I took you out from being able to tolerate Egypt.
You hear that תורה? והוצאתי אתכם תחת סבלות מצרים. The first שלב of redemption is that you're not okay anymore with not wanting קדושה. Simple. It's, it's not okay with you.
The first שלב of anyone wanting to go on a diet or any kind of exercise is that I'm just not okay with not feeling healthy. I'm not okay with it. I can't do, I'm not okay with it. In a bad marriage, the first שלב of health is that I'm not okay with pretending that this is real life and that this is working.
That's the first שלב. The first שלב is really always this consciousness of the way it is now, it's something that I'm not okay with. But for that, oh my god, do you need so much patience with yourself? Because you could find so many places inside, I'm not okay with this, and I'm not okay with that, and I'm not okay with this. You know, Reb Noson learned from Rebbe Nachman that what Rebbe Nachman really wanted is that we really get to know ourselves and not get too freaked out while we're in the process.
Now the place where you get to know yourself the most is here in ארץ ישראל. Therefore, when רב נתן speaks about the תפילות of ארץ ישראל, and I'm going to be doing one with the men now, a different תפילה, is that רבי נחמן says, רב נתן says, make sure that I keep on making עליה. I forget the right words he says here. ואזכה לעלות בכל פעם מדרגה לדרגה.
That once I made עליה, I realized that's just the first שלב. Then I'm going to get to know myself differently. Then I'm going to see another side of me. Then I'm going to see another side of me.
And every time I go and see another side of me, may the holiness of patience, which is formed through אמונה, define who I am. And without that, none of us stand a chance here, and the land will throw us up. פשוט. It's just the way it is.Now the only thing, the only, I guess the only question we have here is when it comes to a non-messianic world that משיח hasn't come yet, are you supposed to have patience with that as well?No, right? No more.
You're supposed to yearn for it, no?Yeah, but how could you yearn for something and at the same time say, I want it so badly and if it's okay if he doesn't come because I have to work on patience. You can't live like that.You know, it's, השם is in control of that and השם isn't bringing it, and you still, you could want to want it more than.Yeah, but how does it work?The reason is we don't want it enough.Right.I think if you know that it's part of a process and you're a part of it, you don't know if you're going to be there at the end, but you're you're part of it, so... But sometimes it's not enough. But sometimes it doesn't doesn't it doesn't satisfy the soul, even though I know.
I mean, חיה, we were talking about having ביטחון basically. That if I really trust השם, that even though it didn't happen now, I trust that השם knows exactly when it's going to come.But you're still going to דאווענען for it, but you're not going to give up because of that.Right. So that's that, I guess it gets a little bit tricky over here, but the concept of לסבול, of the סבל, of tolerating it, of infusing it in our hearts... I don't know, I think that today if today's the day where they decide if the גאולה, and that's why I said it, right now, because according to the חתם סופר, יום הדין של הגאולה.
Today is the day of judgment of redemption. היום שבו מחליטים בשמים אם שנה זאת תהיה סוף סוף שנת גאולה או לא. So we'll just end off by saying like this. And give this as a as a ברכה to all of us.
What's one of the things that happened on עשרה בטבת?הא?The siege.Yeah, the siege. It was the beginning of what happened later on. So many times in life, we there are סימנים in the beginning of חורבנות. There are סימנים that we try to like, put a blind eye to, like, oh, I could see that that if things keep on going down this way, it's going to be really, really bad.
Today is the beginning of the of the siege on ירושלים, of the חומות, of, you know, the beginning of what ended up being really bad. So the רבונו של עולם sends us סימנים all the time of how things can get really bad. The השאלה is, can I grab on to it now before things get too bad and realize I need help now. I don't want to wait till it's too late.
So I think with the כח of the צדיק of of רב נתן's יארצייט being today and of all the קדושה that are around us, learning this תורה here in ארץ ישראל, being among someone who left Lakewood to make עליה today, beyond my, it's just a... It could not have fit in, you know.משיח's here.Yeah, this is it, yeah.I know where I was coming today.Neither did we, by the way. Neither did we. Anyway, the זכות of the צדיקים and our hunger to feel swallowed up by it, should give us enough כח to not be so hung up not on not losing the real me and being open enough to discovering who the real us really is.אמן.אמן to all that.
All right. Is he, are they back yet? Do you know?Can I just add one thing? You were talking, you were talking about children...Yeah, of course.You can hold on to these pages, by the way.I raised five kids here and I raised them, my friend, my friend said, how did you raise five children here? How did you do it? I said, with חן, with grace, because there's so much coming at us all the time in so many ways. So my first daughter's name is חיה and my last son is נתן. So it's חן.It's such a beautiful thing.
I was just thinking of that as you were speaking.They're all included in חן. We thought the same thing this week when we were in חברון. ח and נ. Yes.
Yeah, we also we also had the same חפ when with the word חשבון, but we didn't figure out how that works either. Okay, I guess, a second. You know what? Can you can can you move so we could pass by? Just move over here. יוס...