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Showing Up Anyway is a podcast about unlearning diet culture, redefining health, and making peace with food, movement, and your body -- without needing to have it all together. Hosted by Coach Adam Wright, an anti diet-culture personal trainer and body-trust educator, each episode dives into the imperfect side of wellness and how to navigate motivation burnout, body image struggles, emotional eating and the pressure to be "healthy". This is your reminder that progress doesn't need to be perfect, and you'll still see progress as long as you show up anyway.
Welcome to Showing Up Anyway,
the podcast for people
who are not perfect.
On this show, we talk
about intuitive eating,
fitness without obsession,
and healing your relationship
with food and your body.
Hi, everybody. Welcome
back to Showing Up Anyway.
We took a little bit of a break,
a little two-week hiatus,
but I am back today and I
brought a special guest with me.
This is one of my coaches,
Heather Jones.
And Coach Heather and I have
been working together for,
like, three years now, I think,
a little longer than that,
which is just incredible.
Uh, she is the absolute best,
uh, ask any of her clients,
and, um, I'm super
happy to have her.
Um, Heather's been coaching
for a number of years
and is a mother
and is currently pregnant.
I'm allowed to announce
that, right, at this point?
(THEY LAUGH)
I've already announced
it on socials.
Okay, phew! So, anyway, I thought,
given the circumstances,
that we would talk
about pregnancy today.
And so our podcast topic today
is going to be Pregnancy and
Parenthood with Coach Heather.
(THEY LAUGH)
So, we're going, today,
to start by just talking
a little bit about how health
and fitness change during pregnancy
and what it looks like
to navigate healthy habits
while pregnant
and while raising kids.
I wanted to talk
a little bit about cravings
and movement
and energy and mindset
and just the
realities of parenthood.
I thought we'd start with pregnancy.
Obviously, that's kind
of like the first bit
before you become a parent,
you become pregnant.
So, let's talk about what feels
different during pregnancy,
you know, how your pregnancy has
shifted your definition of healthy,
tell me about that
experience for you.
Yeah, I mean, everything is
different when you get pregnant
and it changes through
the different trimesters.
So, for one thing, everyone's
pregnancy is different.
And so, me speaking,
I'm speaking about my,
you know, first pregnancy
and my second pregnancy,
which could be totally different
from other people's experiences.
But, for me, I feel like the first
trimester is really challenging
when it comes to the changes
in your energy
and how your energy shifts,
where you're using up to
two times as much energy,
just, like, existing
and creating life.
And so getting used to the energy
shifts and getting used to,
um, a lot of the nausea
that might happen during
your first trimester and something
that you just asked, like,
the definition of healthy obviously
changes during pregnancy
because it's not really
a look any more or a checklist,
but more a full picture
with greater meaning.
Like, you want to be healthy
in order to create a healthy
environment for your baby.
Um, so your meaning
behind it is really different.
Do you find that you have to
adopt a new sense of flexibility
that maybe you didn't
have to have before?
Absolutely. I feel like
every day is different.
Some days you're going to
have more energy and it's, like,
"Wow, I want to go to the gym.
I want to do all the things."
And then other days it's, like,
"I can't even
hardly get out of bed."
And so if you have the
same expectations that you had
prior to pregnancy,
you will drive yourself crazy
and you'll feel like a failure,
and so you absolutely have to adapt
and create a new concept of, like,
"Okay, what can I do today?
"What is my energy level today?" And
that's going to look different,
um, every day during pregnancy.
Tell me a little bit about morning
sickness and appetite changes.
You know, how do you cope with food
aversions and just feeling ill?
Obviously, like you mentioned,
this is going to be
different for everybody,
but how was yours? Mine was rough.
And, again, this
is just my experience,
but especially during
the first trimester,
uh, food aversions are huge for me.
I also get super nauseous.
And, um, a misconception
about morning sickness is
that it only happens in the morning
and oftentimes in
your first trimester,
it could be an all day,
multi-day thing
where you're throwing up
dozens of times a day,
even if you're just drinking water
or eating the healthy foods.
And so, for me,
my biggest aversion
this time around was water,
which was super weird for me
because I am a hydration queen.
I love my water.
And so for me to be so,
um, like, turned off by water,
like, every time I drink it,
feeling like I needed to throw up,
I really had to work through that,
which was frustrating.
So, it's different for
everyone. And, you know,
when we, um, talk to our clients,
we talk a lot about
listening to your body's cues,
and it's the exact
same thing during your,
um, morning sickness
and your aversions.
You just do what you can
and your expectations have
to be lowered because your
environment's shifted.
So, how do you decide what
to eat when none of your,
you know, nutritious
options sound good?
Yeah. A very common phrase in,
like, the parenting community
is fed is best.
And oftentimes they're
talking about the baby,
but it totally translates
to pregnancy as well.
It... Healthy is going
to look different
and sometimes you just
need to get your calories in.
For me, I found that I was
most sick in the mornings
and in the evenings,
and so midday is where
I tried to make up for it.
Like, if everything sounded
disgusting in the morning
and so all I could
have was, you know, plain toast
then in the middle of the day,
I would try and get my veggies in,
I'd try and get more water in,
knowing that in the evening I would
probably want something bland again
because I was so nauseous.
So, trying to balance my day
instead of balancing the meals
was really helpful for me.
Yeah, I imagine you have to...
you have to really give yourself
a lot of grace
around less balanced meals.
Every meal's not going
to be perfect.
You're not going to be able
to have protein and fats
and carbs and veggies,
it's just not gonna look like that.
It's hard enough to do that when
you're not pregnant, you know?
How do you deal with cravings,
and your relationship with food?
Yeah, so lucky for me,
I don't have, like,
crazy cravings.
I've seen a lot of, um,
other pregnant women who have,
like, unhinged things,
like, pickles and ice cream and,
like, lucky for me,
mine has been more, like,
I want really soft tortillas
and I really want fruit
and breakfast sandwiches.
And so, for me, especially being
an intuitive eating coach,
it's been easy for me to be,
like, "Okay, like,
"I can eat what I want and then add
the things that I need into this."
And I think that other women can
definitely do the same thing
where if you're craving
that pickles and ice cream, like,
hey, there's a veggie
and there's a carb,
and maybe try and find some protein
at a different point in your day
and just try to balance the day the
best you can around those cravings.
And, most importantly,
you have to avoid the guilt
that often comes with... Yes.
..honoring those cravings.
I know you've worked with
a pregnant person or two.
Have you found that that is an
obstacle you have to overcome?
Yeah, definitely.
And it's hard because,
you know, when you're pregnant,
you're already emotional
and uncomfortable and so then add
guilt into the mix and it can,
uh, create a really hard time
trying to have a neutral feeling
around food.
And something that - I don't know if
this is the correct way to do it -
but something for me
that's really helped is like,
well, this is what the baby wants,
and I have to figure out how
to make it nutritious
because I know that part,
but baby is craving this.
So, I don't know if that's
helpful, but, for me,
it just helped me neutralize food,
like, baby likes ice cream
and that's what we're doing today.
So, I got to figure out
how to fit it in!
Yeah, I like this. It's like
a little mindset shift,
I think that's really cool.
So, how...? Let's move on to
movement, movement and exercise.
Were there any movements
that felt great pre-pregnancy
versus while you're pregnant?
You know, what feels
supportive for your body now?
Is it the same stuff,
is it different?
Yeah, I love this question.
Before pregnancy, I primarily
trained as a powerlifter,
lifting heavy to improve
my bench squat, deadlift,
and I also did some endurance
training, like cycling and hiking.
Pregnancy, for me my pregnancies
have luckily been low-risk.
It's a little different if you're
a higher risk pregnancy.
You want to go based off of what
your doctor's limitations are.
But, for me, basically I was
given no limitations
other than what
is uncomfortable for me.
So, as a coach,
it's helpful to know
what sort of changes
I can make to those moves.
Like, for my deadlift example,
er, for example, I can't deadlift
conventionally anymore
because I'm almost
six months pregnant
and there's a baby in the way.
So, having to do it sumo
and beltless
and maybe a little
bit lighter just because,
you know, we do have to adapt.
But I think there's a misconception
that being pregnant means
you can't lift heavy and you can't
continue to do all the things.
I've talked to several doctors
who say that
they have pregnant women
who run marathons
while they're in their,
you know, sixth
or seventh month.
And it's all about listening to
your body at the end of the day.
So, if it feels comfortable for you,
you can continue to do all
the things that you love doing,
it's just going to feel
a little different
and your energy's going to be a
little different, and that's okay.
Yeah. So, for some pregnant people,
you're going to need to
lower the intensity. Mm-hm.
I'm sure there are some changes in
your balance and some... Yeah.
..you know, discomfort
that maybe you have to explore.
And what about, like, safety?
You kind of touched on
it a little bit, like,
just, like, safety considerations,
and are there any myths about
exercise during pregnancy?
Yeah. I mean, the one I mentioned,
um, that's the biggest one,
is that you're not supposed
to lift heavy.
And there's been some recent
studies that have come out
that say that lifting heavy during
your pregnancy can actually improve
the health of the baby and even lead
to some cognitive function benefits,
which is really interesting.
Another misconception is
that pregnant women can't run.
Like I mentioned, there's a
lot of women who continue to run
and even run marathons.
There are some
considerations with safety.
My health care provider
stress the importance of,
you know, balance,
like you mentioned before,
because your hips are shifting
and so balance is going to
feel a little different.
So, single leg movements, it's still
super important that you do them,
so you continue to improve your
balance during pregnancy.
But just being aware of your
surroundings and knowing, like,
"Okay, if I were to fall,
is there a wall that I can,
"you know, put my hand on
and catch myself?"
Same thing when it
comes to, like, cycling.
Uh, one adaptation I've had to make,
just because the risk of injury
from falling during cycling is
higher than normal.
So, making sure that you're
not doing downhill cycling,
making sure that you're cycling
not on a road with cars,
but on bike paths, things like that.
No off roading. Yes, no off roading.
So, the limitations more so
are making sure
that you don't have a
risk for injury of the baby
or falling, just because
that can really put your baby
in a situation you don't want.
And then, obviously,
there are a lot of benefits
for movement generally, right?
Stress relief, sleep, mental health,
which are all things that
are affected by pregnancy,
so a lot of reasons to keep moving.
Generally... And you feel free to
correct me,
but at least this was what
I was taught when I was, uh,
becoming a trainer
was the general rule is
if you are pregnant
and were exercising before,
you can kind of keep doing
what you're doing,
but if you weren't really exercising
and you get pregnant,
it's maybe not the time to
pick up a bunch of exercise.
Yeah, it's...
That's exactly correct.
Um, so if you were training
pretty consistently before,
having the same amount of
intensity is pretty safe.
However, if you weren't
consistently working out before,
it doesn't necessarily mean that
you need to avoid movement,
in fact, doing mobility,
doing stability training,
walking are all super great,
but it's not the time to pick up
powerlifting or, um, like CrossFit.
So, it's more so the intensity
in that way
because your body is shifting
and your balance
is going to feel different.
And so you don't want
to be compromised
doing things that are new.
Another thing to consider,
obviously,
is going to be like your energy
and your fatigue
and, to some degree,
like your motivation,
um, which is unreliable anyway,
but how do you navigate exhaustion
while still doing the exercise and
the movement and the things that,
uh, that provide you
that kind of care?
Yeah, I think rule number one,
like, first step is having
grace for yourself
and understanding that what you're
doing is, like, a crazy feat.
Uh, when you're pregnant
and or breastfeeding,
you're burning up to double the
amount of energy you normally would.
And a lot of research compares
this to extreme endurance sports,
like training or competing in the
Tour de France or Ironman races.
So, understanding that
you're already starting out, like,
baseline level exhausted,
it gives more perspective for the
things that you do during the day.
So, I think, you know, if you
have a little less energy,
it's warranted, and then
doing what you can on
the days where you feel
a little bit better,
like, "Today, I feel
up for a workout",
or, "Today, I feel up
for maybe a five-minute walk
"and that's the best I can do",
having, like, radical acceptance
of that and being, like,
"Wow, my body is doing this
insanely incredible thing
"and if I can get a few more steps
on top of that, that's okay,
"but I'm already, like,
crushing it as a human."
I think that, for me,
has helped mentally be, like,
"Okay, like, I'm creating a human
and look at me - on top of it
"I did a ten-minute walk,
or I did my workout today
"cos I felt a little better."
So your motivation is going to be
shifted a little bit.
Yeah, so how do you deal with
motivation when it's low?
Me, personally, I think having
that conversation with myself, like,
"Where is this coming from?
"Why do I feel like
my motivation is low?
"What's been going on in my
day that has made me feel
"like I can't get to the gym,
"or I can't do this walk
or this workout?"
And so, I think having
a more full picture approach,
like, "Maybe I didn't
sleep great last night
"because I had crazy cramps
and I had to get up
"and pee five times cos I'm
pregnant. Oh, that makes sense."
Like, my motivation is,
you know, based on environment.
It's not what's wrong with me,
what's wrong with me mentally.
But it's, like,
"Okay, what happened in my
environment to make it
"so I don't feel up
to these tasks today?"
I think another really big topic
that's important to talk about is
your mindset around your body,
you know, body image and how to...
I'd love your opinion
on how to, like,
accept body changes
and shift your expectations.
How do you deal with
the emotional ups and downs
of watching your
body grow and change?
Yeah, that's such a big topic.
And, you know, being
100% transparent,
this was probably the hardest thing
for me to go through during
my first pregnancy
because I was just
newly a personal trainer,
I was in the fitness industry
and so kind of allowing
myself to let go of that control
over my body and how it
looked aesthetically
was really hard for me,
and it took a lot of work
and a lot of therapy.
(HEATHER LAUGHS)
And so, I think, again,
shifting your mindset to
what my body is doing
instead of what my body looks like
is so crucial during
pregnancy because, you know,
nine months may not seem
like a lot of time,
but when you're sitting
in your body that's growing
and shifting and changing
and having all those aches
and pains associated with it
at the same time,
it feels more like a long distance
marathon rather than a sprint.
And so you really
need to have that,
that mental shift
in order to not go insane.
And so, for me, I think it was
so important to be like,
"Wow, my body is creating life
"and it's a means to an end
and that's okay.
And the fact that my body
can even do this
"and that I'm so privileged
"to be able to create
a life is incredible.
"I can get my autonomy back after
"and it'll look different
and that's okay."
But it's more so thinking of it
as, like, I am adapting
and changing to create this life
rather than just
watching my body shift.
So, when it comes to rest
and recovery,
obviously this is a
big part of pregnancy, right?
Mm. Learning to take it easy
when you need to.
How do you listen
to signals for rest?
Things like sleep,
like, how does that change,
and how do you know
when you need to,
when you need to move
and when you need to not move?
Yeah, I love this topic
because it's something
that I feel like
I have grown a lot in,
out of necessity for myself.
Um, before pregnancy and having
kids,
I was very much a go-go-go person.
I loved doing all the things,
all the time.
Rest was honestly hard for me.
And then during pregnancy
it kind of,
um, slapped me in the face
and it helped me realize, like,
oh, wow, this is so important
because it's not just
about me anymore.
It's about this new life
that I'm creating.
And if I don't rest, it could
be detrimental to the baby.
And so having that
mindset shift of, like,
"Okay, it's no longer
just about me anymore.
"I can't just run myself to
the ground,
"there's a, you know,
bigger purpose,"
it helped me understand
the importance of rest
and now it's such
a big part of my journey in,
um, health and fitness
because I've been able to come
back stronger because of it.
Really utilizing my rest days,
um, specifically in pregnancy,
like we preach over and over again,
it's really listening
to your body's cues.
There's going to be days
where you feel
like you need extra rest
and you need that three-hour
nap, and that's okay.
And then there's other days
where you're going
to have more energy and
taking advantage of that.
So, really being able to adapt to
what your body is telling you
is so important to stay sane.
Even if you had, you know, that
workout planned for today
and you feel like you need a nap
instead of a workout, being, like,
"Okay, this is
what my body needs today.
"Where can I fit this
in later in the week
"when maybe I'm feeling
a little bit more rested?"
So, understanding your body's cues
and really leaning into that
because it's so crucial
for not only your health,
health of the baby, and then
also after pregnancy,
you know, postpartum recovery,
rest is so crucial.
So, I think having
the meaning behind it
and then being able to
adapt your schedule
and your choices around it -
so important.
Interestingly enough,
rest is probably one of the hardest,
it's one of the hardest
things to get our clients to do.
Yes. When they are locked in
and they want it badly,
they don't slow down.
And so, we... And so, for pregnant
people and non-pregnant people,
I think it is really important
to remember that rest is
a healthy habit.
It is a form of self-care
and it is part of the program.
It's not a lack of doing something,
it's not a lack of being productive,
it's just being productive
in a different way.
Since you started
talking about postpartum,
let's talk a little bit about
the transition from
pregnancy to parenthood.
Heather, after you gave
birth to your daughter,
what surprised you
about postpartum health?
Did your priorities shift
when you became a parent?
I mean, I assume that's a yes...
(THEY LAUGH)
..but, you know, just
tell me about that.
Yeah. I mean, it's such a big topic
and I could go on and on
because your whole life transforms.
And, you know, I think
nowadays with social media,
there's a lot
more information out there,
a lot more people are talking
about their experiences.
But, still, even with my first
pregnancy,
I feel like not
enough people talk about
the toll that birth
really takes on your body.
And I had a pretty, like,
natural, normal birth,
so I can't even imagine people
who have higher risk
and complications.
But no-one really talks
about that first,
you know, like, the
baby coming out of you,
what that does on your body
and the recovery afterwards,
you know, stitches in places,
having a hard time getting
dressed, all the things is crazy.
So, the... I feel like a
lot of people focus on, like,
the back, the bounce back culture
and when you're, like,
in those early
trenches of postpartum,
it's impossible for you to even,
like, comprehend that.
So, I think just being really
patient with yourself,
understanding that
it went through...
..your body went through
something so crazy.
So, that's first, you know,
early trenches of postpartum.
And then after that, all of a
sudden you have this whole new human
that you're just expected
to take care of,
and you should know how to do it.
And a lot of that is figuring out,
like, what your baby needs,
cos all babies are so different
and there's a lot of,
like, mental energy,
like, am I doing this right?
Am I doing that right?
And so you're just exhausted
all the time from that.
And then, um, obviously babies don't
sleep very well in the beginning,
so that's exhausting
in and of itself.
In a nutshell,
it's not about you anymore.
You are in charge
of this other life,
and any free time that you have is
because someone else
gave you their time,
whether that's your partner
or whether you paid for
a babysitter or childcare,
it's somebody else's time now,
so you no longer just have
free time that's completely yours.
Um, so shifting your whole life
around this new human is just...
I'm having a hard time
even putting words to it,
but that's the best
I can to describe it.
It's a huge shift. Yeah,
we're going to talk about that too,
because you're so right.
Once things shift,
it makes self-care, it makes your
priorities seemingly less important.
Mm-hm. And it's really
hard to find that balance
to still care for yourself. Yeah.
Because one thing that I do
tell my, my, um, my parents,
my clients, not my parents,
but my clients who are
parents is that, you know,
just because your kids
come first,
it doesn't mean you have
to put yourself last.
And so, you know,
we owe it to our kids.
I'm not a parent, but you owe it,
parents owe it to their kids
to take care of themselves,
but it's challenging.
It is absolutely challenging.
What are some things you wish
you knew the first time around?
Right off the bat, just your
experience is entirely your own.
I feel like, you know,
you hear so often
that comparison is the thief of joy,
but I would also say that
especially in parenthood,
comparison will either, like,
make or break your experience
and your ability to,
like, come out and succeed
with your health and fitness,
because social media is
so interesting where -
I've been guilty of this too -
where everyone posts the highlights
but nobody posts the trenches.
And so understanding that,
like, your journey is your own,
your timeline is your own
because everyone has
different support systems,
maternity leaves,
financial situations
and so not comparing your,
you know, early child
experience to other people for one,
I wish that I would've
known that sooner,
I would've thought about it,
had more support in that way,
because I just saw a lot of, like,
people on TikTok who were posting.
their, like, happy
little baby experiences
and their bounce back experiences,
and it's just, it's so different
and it's also so fabricated.
So, that number one, and then also
just radical acceptance
of your own experience
and really leaning into
those early moments with your baby
because you're not going
to get those back,
they grow so fast, and if
you're so focused on bouncing back,
losing the baby weight,
social, er,
society's expectations of mothers
that you forget to enjoy the baby
and get yourself feeling good
enough for those experiences,
then you're doing yourself
a disservice
and you're robbing yourself of,
you know,
the early times with your baby.
Yeah.
Yeah, I really want...
I'm glad you mentioned
the bounce back mindset
because there is this immense
social pressure to bounce back.
You see it in media
with celebrities,
you see it probably
with your friends. Yeah.
You probably see it with,
you know, anybody, you know,
um, wow, they look so good
since they had a baby,
or they've gained weight
since the baby
and they haven't
been able to lose it,
like, you hear about
it all the time.
What is that pressure like? I mean,
do you feel an immense
amount of pressure?
Uh, did you and do you now being,
you know, close to your
second child? Yeah.
I feel like everyone,
uh, especially women,
feels that pressure to some point.
Um, just because it is so loud and
it's also a whole market, right?
Like, they kind of prey on pregnant
women's insecurities
to market certain products.
And so it's like,
that's a whole other topic.
But, um, for me, I feel
like there's been a lot of pressure,
especially from
the fitness community,
because you see all
these women who are, like,
"Oh, this is my body
one week postpartum.
"This is my body three
months postpartum.
"This is my body
six months postpartum."
And it's so easy
to compare yourself
to those other women
and their experiences when,
again, like I said, you could have
totally different
life set-up than them.
And it could be, you know,
their full-time job,
whereas for you, you're
working a full-time job
while taking care of your
kid most of the time.
So your experience is going
to be totally different
for one thing.
And something that
has really helped me
with my mindset is thinking
of it more as a transformation,
rather than trying
to go back to what I was
because I, you know who I was
before, I don't know her anymore.
Like, I got a whole ass kid,
I've got another one on the way.
My life is so different that, like,
bouncing back to that is impossible.
Even if I had all the time in the
world and I could, you know, try,
my life is different,
my priorities are different.
So instead of trying
to bounce back to,
you know, 25 year old me who had
no cares in the world
and had all the time to do fitness,
now I want to transform,
to have my fitness
mean something else.
So after my first pregnancy
and having my wonderful daughter,
all of a sudden fitness
didn't mean, like,
a picture or a aesthetic,
but it was, like,
I don't want to be a sideline mom.
I want to be able to run and
do all the things with my kid,
and have enough energy to
keep up with her curiosity
and play tag with her at the
park and be able to pick her up
and protect her if I needed to.
So, fitness means so many different
things than it did
when I was 25 back then, and I
don't want to bounce back to that
cos I'm not her anymore.
So, I think, you know,
allowing your fitness to mean
something else postpartum is
so important and
finding that new meaning
because that motivation is insane,
like Mama Bear instincts
is awesome.
And if you can, like, put that
into your fitness and be, like,
"Okay, I'm training to, like,
save my kid from whatever,"
like, you're unstoppable.
So, I think leaning into
that is so cool.
And the fact that women
are kind of stuck
on this bounce back
culture is crazy.
Yeah. See, and this is
why I have you on my team,
Heather, cos we speak
the same language.
I tell my clients the exact same
thing. You cannot go back in time.
You are a different person now.
Like, you're not only your body,
but just your whole
life has now changed.
You cannot go back to this
period of time before pregnancy.
That doesn't mean you can't
want change or see change,
but you're never going
to be who you were.
Instead, now you're a new person,
so let's look forward
instead of looking back. Yep.
So I'm so happy that you spread -
I knew you would,
but I'm so happy you
spread that same message
because it has to be,
that has to be your mindset.
So, let's talk about balancing
health with being a parent.
What is it like to make time
for meals and movement
while you're raising kids?
Yeah, logistics is a real
thing that you have to figure out
pretty quickly with a kid.
Like I said, all of a
sudden you have this child
who takes up all your time
and you can't just hop,
hop off to the gym whenever you
want or spend hours meal prepping.
It definitely takes a
little bit of planning.
For me, I really hit
the lottery with my partner
and we really work
hand-in-hand together
to come up with a plan every week,
and we share responsibilities.
But if your life
doesn't look like that,
just understanding
who you can lean on,
really trying to figure out
what your support system is
and if you don't have
a lot of support,
you know, from friends
or family,
trying to find gym communities
that do, like, mommy and me workout
classes or that have, um,
childcare facilities and
reaching out to your community
in that way for
specifically workouts,
I think that will really help.
Something that me and my
husband did in the beginning
was we had alternate days,
so, like, Tuesdays and
Thursdays were my days to workout
and I knew that and
I could count on that,
and then he had
Mondays and Wednesdays.
And so, for us, we just built
in a system that worked.
And I know that'll look
different for everyone,
but really communicating
with your partner
or your family or your friends
what you need and being able
to lean on people is
so important because, again,
you need someone else's time
in order to make it work
for your child to be cared
for during your workouts.
And then specifically for meals,
I think making it
as simple as possible,
especially in the beginning,
because for one thing,
you're going to be sleep deprived
and you're not going to have
the same time or mental
capacity to meal prep
for weeks and weeks on end
and spend countless
time researching,
you know, your meals and
going to the grocery store.
For us, it was really helpful to
lean into simple foods, like,
here's a protein that I can mass
cook in 30 minutes
and then have in the fridge,
and then I can build meals around
that using a crockpot,
using an air fryer, things
that are just easy and simple.
Sometimes it looks
like toddler plates
where we have a pile of chicken,
we have our choice of carb
and we have green beans
for our veggie and that's okay.
But as long as you're fed
and those components are there
really just keeping it simple.
Yeah.
Um, how do you adapt your habits,
your new, er,
the habits you're looking to
instil around nap schedules
and school and childcare
and things like that?
This mysterious husband is Corey,
who's one of my other coaches,
and, yes, you're right,
he's just outstanding.
I watch the way that you
guys work and the synergy
you have with parenthood,
and it's just fantastic,
and you guys are both very lucky to
have such a great support system.
But, you know, for
people maybe who don't,
what advice would you give them
about trying to find time?
So, we have this phrase
that I think started early
in the trenches of, you know,
parenthood - adapt or die.
And so, like, if
your child has a nap schedule
that's, like, pretty
consistent knowing, like,
okay, for nap number one,
I'm going to get this workout done.
Nap number two, I'm gonna
nap because I'm exhausted.
And then nap number three,
maybe I'll do some meal prep.
Just having, like, kind of
a plan for yourself,
but allowing yourself to
adapt because that kid
is going to switch it up on you.
Um, they oftentimes will create
these habits or routines, I guess,
sleep schedules for themselves or
will try and implement something
and then they'll
like completely 180.
So, you have to be
willing to change and accept,
like, okay, like
that did work for us
and now we've just got to
find a new routine.
Again, finding either a gym that
has childcare is really helpful,
leaning on friends
and family in the beginning
who can maybe bring
you some meals,
that's going to be really important
and then just really
prioritizing sleep for sure.
So, how do you adjust
for unpredictable sleep
with a newborn?
I mean, you do the best you can.
Having realistic expectations
or you will just drive
yourself crazy because
you're not going
to get your 8 to 10 hours
of beauty sleep.
It just doesn't exist.
If someone tells you that
their baby sleeps that way,
don't believe them, because
then you'll just be angry
cos yours is not
going to sleep that way.
But something that really helped us
in the beginning is just going
to sleep when the
baby goes to sleep.
Um, even if it was, like, 8pm and
we wanted to stay up and hang out
and watch a movie, whatever, going
to sleep right away really helps
because those night-time wake ups
are really rough, especially for me,
I have a really hard
time falling back asleep.
My husband can
fall asleep like that,
and I low-key hated him for it.
For me, I knew that it was gonna
take me a while to fall back asleep,
and so I needed to start
my sleep earlier because of that.
So, going to sleep at 8pm
and then having those
night-time wake ups,
and then sometimes getting up
at like six in the morning,
and that's just what it was, trying
to get a nap in during the day.
But your sleep is
just going to be different.
It's not going to be what you want,
it's not going to be ideal,
but it will get better eventually
and so there's a light at the
end of the tunnel,
and you just have
to radically accept that.
Just got to know that it
will get better eventually. Yes!
Well, when it's not, when it's
bad, when you're not sleeping,
you know, many hours, obviously
that's going to affect a
lot of your food choices
and your mood and your motivation.
Any tips for working around that?
Yeah, I mean, that's something
that I talk to my clients
about all the time, even clients
who don't have kids,
who aren't pregnant, you know,
we still have people
who suffer from insomnia
or who have really rough work
schedules that make it hard to get,
you know, that ideal
eight hours of sleep
and the sleep is the foundation to
everything in health and fitness
and so having sleep that's a
little bit more compromised,
we just have to understand
our expectations
are going to be a little different.
If there's a night where maybe you
get a lot less sleep than
other nights, especially if
it's with a newborn baby where,
like, maybe that baby is sick
and you didn't sleep most
of the night,
that's not going to be the
day where I'm gonna tell
myself I'm going to go to the gym
and hit a PR on this thing
that I've been working towards,
because it's just not realistic.
So, having to adjust
expectations and know,
okay, today is going to
be a rest day
because I absolutely need
it and that's okay,
but tomorrow we can try again.
And just allowing yourself to adapt,
because if you are stuck
in this rigid routine
of expectations for yourself,
you're not going to survive
and you're not going
to be able to have, um,
the fitness or the health
that you want during especially
those early stages of,
you know, postpartum
and early childhood
and parenting and even
people who don't have kids,
like I said, you just have
to be able to adapt for that
and give yourself grace.
So, um, another topic, uh, we
got this in a comment on TikTok,
somebody asked me,
they mentioned that they know
that stress plays
an important role in,
um, in just kind of health
and nutrition and weight loss,
and they asked, how do I
keep my stress low
as a stay-at-home mom
of two kids under three? Ooft.
So, any tips for stress management?
Well, I wouldn't say that
you can keep your stress low
in that situation,
but you can do things that help.
So, you know, again having
realistic expectations,
knowing that those little kiddos are
gonna be stressors in your day
and you're already going
to be at a higher, you know,
mental capacity than most
people who don't have kids,
who aren't in that same situation,
but then doing little things
that you know will help bring
you down to ground level again.
Um, even if it's just ten minutes
letting your kids play
with something while you're
doing breathing exercises
instead of scrolling
on your phone,
or taking the kids for a walk
and letting them kind of,
you know, discover things at a
park while you're having some,
like grounding exercises,
doing some mental work.
It's going to be more moments
throughout the day,
you're not going to have these big
chunks of time where you can,
you know, go sit in a bath
or go get a massage.
Like that's probably
not realistic for,
you know, a stay-at-home
mom with two under three,
uh, but having those little
moments of grounding,
doing things with the
kids that are, you know,
less you entertaining them and them
hopefully entertaining themselves
for a second so that
you can get some time.
Um, I think also setting yourself
up where there's less decisions
throughout the day can
be really helpful
because your mental capacity is
just so high in that situation.
Great advice. Let's talk a little
bit about nutrition in parenthood.
Um, another comment that
I got was, they said,
"Ever since I had my daughter,
I haven't been eating well
"because I haven't had the
same time to devote to meal prep
"or making meals."
So, you know, do you have any,
maybe any tips,
any quick meal, uh, hacks that
maybe help when time is short?
Yeah. This is something
that I hear a lot,
especially from my
clients who are parents
where it seems like all
of the time and energy
goes to feeding the child,
and, at the same time, it's
like, oh, I forgot to eat
or I didn't have time
to feed myself.
And one really simple rule
that I give is you eat
when the baby eats,
or you eat when your kid eats.
And so, you know,
if you're making your kid
something for lunch,
that's a great cue to be like,
oh, I probably need lunch too.
And if you're making your kid
something and maybe it's not
the same thing that you want to
eat, trying to make yourself
a plate of something during
that time can be really helpful,
even if it's not the ideal meal.
Ideally, we would have some
sort of time to put something
in the crockpot or maybe make
some protein over the weekend.
Me and my husband
specifically love to either smoke
a whole bunch of protein or grill
a whole bunch of protein on
a weekend day so that we can
build meals around it
throughout the week,
so if I'm making my
daughter something,
then I can just be like,
oh,
let me hurry and put
chicken and lettuce in a tortilla.
And that's my protein,
carbs and veggie.
And that's something so easy as long
as it's got the components prepared.
So that would be my tip,
is just having some easy components
that you can just compile together
for yourself while you're
already feeding your kid.
And then also just,
you know, a great,
you know, segue into helping
children have healthy eating habits,
also showing like,
"Hey, this is our protein,
"this is a carb,
this is a veggie."
You can help your kid
kind of see that too.
And then, you know,
that helps remind you
that you need those things.
Yeah. Um, the first time
I heard "you eat when the kid eats"
is when I talked to Corey.
So, occasionally, for those
of you listening, I'll check in,
you know, I have biweekly
meetings with my coaches,
and, um, and I remember Corey,
that was some advice
that he gave to his client,
um, which was really cool.
So, it's nice...
Obviously, I'm not surprised
hearing you mirror that.
Definitely. So, I think that's
a really great to do that.
It is so important because I hear
that a lot too from parents,
is that, "I forgot to eat."
"Uh, I fed my kids,
but I didn't eat."
So, yes, I think that
making sure you're fed,
and then also I was
asked about modeling
a healthy relationship
with food for kids.
So, education, obviously,
is important,
you kind of already mentioned that.
So, educating yourself about
nutrition is going to be important,
just like, you know,
you need to learn math
so you can help them
with their homework,
you also got to know
a little bit about nutrition
so we can teach them healthier
habits and more about nutrition.
So, any other tips on modeling
a healthy relationship
with food for your kids?
Yeah, something that we have
really loved incorporating
into our family is talking
about what food does for us.
So, food gives us energy,
food makes us strong.
And so, if we're having lunch
before an activity,
we talk to our daughter about, like,
"Okay, we gotta eat so
that we have all the energy
"to go swimming or
to go play at the park."
And so being really intentionable...
Er, sorry, intentional
about the words
that you use around food
instead of just like,
"Finish your food,
finish your plate,
"we can't go until you're done",
giving meaning behind it
and letting them know,
like, what the food is for and
why we're taking time to eat it.
Cos, you know, especially
for my four year old,
she doesn't like to do things
that take time away
from her activities, and so getting
her to sit and eat a meal
can sometimes be really difficult.
But when we let her know,
"Hey, you're gonna have
"so much energy
at swim lessons today
"because you finished your food",
that really helps.
And then, you know, we do
take her to the gym with us,
and she sees us lifting weights
and using dumbbells.
And we tell her, like, "Oh, if you
eat your steak and your chicken,
"then your muscles will get
big and strong like Dada."
And so, just letting her know,
like, that food has purpose
and that it makes you big
and strong and really fast,
um, that's something that's
been really cool to see,
because we now get to
hear her talk about it.
On the other end of
the spectrum here, Heather,
is modeling a bad
relationship with food,
and this is hard because most
of our clients come to us
already struggling
with that themselves.
And so whether they're new parents
or have been parents a while,
that's something that
their kids pick up.
Kids are so smart,
they're little sponges,
and even if you think,
"Oh, they don't know,
"they don't see me
weighing myself.
"They don't see me, you know,
counting my calories."
They do.
And so, you know, how do
you, on the flip side,
avoid teaching your kids
a poor relationship with food?
You know, teaching them food rules
and showing them dieting
and all that stuff, because that's
pretty harmful for children.
Yeah, definitely. I mean, I
think we have so many clients
who come to us and talk
to us about,
"Oh, my mom put us put me on a
diet when I was eight years old,"
or, you know, "My dad put
locks on the cabinets,"
you know, things that are really
harmful that stick with us
for years and years.
And so, I think, for me, coming
up with specific boundaries
around food,
where I never want to
tell my daughter,
like, "Okay, you have
to clean your plate,"
or, "Don't eat too much or
you'll get, you know, X, Y, Z."
I don't want her to have, you know,
that connection between food
and what her body looks like,
but more so what
her body feels like.
And so being really intentional
about the vocabulary I use
around food and what food is for,
what food is doing for us,
rather than what food does to us,
or being scared of food.
Um, we really don't
use words like that.
So, I think, you know, if you're
concerned about passing on
harmful habits or relationship
with food to your kids,
just being like, "Okay, like,
what was harmful for me?
"What did I see and what do
I want to do differently?"
And then having those boundaries
and holding those boundaries.
I got a comment that said, uh,
"I have a newborn and
a three year old."
I think, basically, what I got
from this comment was,
this person sometimes
can't wait for hunger cues,
or doesn't wait for the hunger cues
because they're worried
they may have to stop
and help the baby.
There may be something
they have to, you know,
maybe the baby's crying and
they got to go do something,
and then they're hungry
and it's too late.
That's kind of what I got from it.
So, I'm sure
there's kind of scenarios
that you've run into like that.
How do you listen to
your hunger cues,
and do they change
when you're breastfeeding?
Because we know you have
to eat a little bit more
when you're breastfeeding so you
can maintain your milk supply.
Mm-hm. But how do
those things relate?
This is going to be a
little different for everyone,
but what I have found to be the most
helpful is having non-negotiables.
Knowing that, for sure, you
need breakfast, lunch and dinner.
And you don't necessarily have
to wait for hunger cues
for those three meals.
That was helpful for me
to have that structure.
Like, I know I need breakfast,
I know I need lunch,
I know I need dinner.
So if you're worried about,
like, waiting until you're hungry
and then being super busy
with the baby,
just having a plan, like, "Okay,
I know that the baby is going
"to eat during this lunch period
and I also need to eat,
"and that's non-negotiable,
even if I'm not super hungry,
"because I may not be able to eat
in an hour when I'm hungry."
So, knowing that those three
meals are taken care of,
and then when you're breastfeeding,
you're burning up to, like,
500 calories extra per day
just by producing milk, and so
if you're hungry on top of that,
then definitely allowing
yourself to have some snacks
in between those
non-negotiable meals
and having things that are
easily just grab and go on hand
that you can eat while
you're breastfeeding,
that's going to be really helpful
because you're already,
you know, sitting down
in a chair taking care of the baby,
if you could have something nearby,
even if it's not the most
balanced snack, fed is best,
and having something in between
those times,
basically to avoid being hangry
because then at that point
you're too far gone
and it's so much harder to take care
of yourself when you're starving.
Yeah. And then on top of that, we
don't want to mistreat the child,
get angry at them
because you're hangry
because you didn't get a
chance to eat.
Yep. There's a lot to balance there.
So, let's talk a little bit about,
uh, movement as a parent
because someone asked, uh, they
said, "I'd like to lose weight.
"I have time and energy to diet,
but no time to exercise.
"I could probably find the time, but
I'm tired and I want to relax."
How do you find the
balance? Mm.
Well, we say this all the time,
but exercise is a terrible tool
for weight loss.
And so if you're
wanting to lose weight
and all you have time to do is focus
on your diet and nutrition,
you're actually sitting pretty great
if you want to reach those goals,
it just takes a little
bit of planning
and having a good plan
and having structure.
But if you're wanting to add in
a little bit of movement for,
you know, improve quality
of life and getting stronger
and being able to keep up with your
kids and having more energy,
that's more so when I would try
and add in some movement.
Something for me that helped when
I was in the early trenches
and I didn't have a lot of time was
trying to do little movements
during the day,
whether that's ten air squats
while I'm waiting for the
microwave to go off or,
you know, I'm in the bathroom
and I'm washing my hands,
and instead of going straight
back out to the baby,
doing a couple of reverse lunges.
Just adding little movements here
and there that made me feel like
I was doing something
throughout the day,
rather than trying to block out
a full 45 minutes for a workout.
So, that's something
that you can try.
Also, going for walks with your baby
or your kids to get some steps in
and then maybe trying to race them,
you know, adding in a
little bit of, like, cardio,
like, "Okay, I'm gonna race
you to the bottom of this hill."
That really helps me get my
steps in with my four year old.
So, just having different ideas of
what fitness looks like.
It doesn't necessarily have
to be a structured workout,
it can be little movements
throughout the day. That's smart.
I really like the creative ways
that you have to get moving
when you can't go to the gym.
You know, I think racing
your kids or something,
that's really cute, picking
them up, play with them.
I don't have kids, but I
have nieces and nephews.
And I tell you, when I go over
to their house, there's...
I have eight of them and
they're jumping all over me.
And, boy, I've had workouts
that were less exhausting
than playing with those kids!
(THEY LAUGH)
How else can you, you know,
incorporate kids into movement?
I know you mentioned bringing, uh,
bringing your daughter to the gym,
you know, but what can you do
to maybe help them
have fun with exercise?
You said you mentioned
going for walks,
playing obviously with
them is activity.
Is there family activities
you like to do with your husband?
Uh, what do you like to do?
We love having dance parties.
So, me and my daughter will turn on
music and just dance like crazy for,
you know, until we're tired,
so that's a really great way
to get movement in.
And like you said, sometimes
that's honestly harder
than some of my cardio
workouts I've done.
Um, and then she likes to be picked
up and, like, put on my shoulders
and sometimes I'll do, like,
squats and reverse lunges with her.
And it's really fun because
she gets to bounce around
and she's really tall
and she's excited about that.
So there's, um, those things
that I've incorporated,
I've also seen a lot of clients
that will take their kids to, like,
jump parks and trampoline parks
and things like that
and actually do it
with them and not just,
like, sit on the sidelines.
That's a way that you can
get movement in for sure.
Now, uh, I think another
big part of this,
we mentioned guilt when it
comes to, you know, your nutrition.
But also it is just as
important to remove guilt
if your workouts aren't perfect
or perfectly consistent.
How do you manage the negative
mindset when it, you know,
when you miss a workout or you
weren't very active that day?
Ugh, it can be so hard.
Um, especially when workouts,
they make me really happy.
I really love lifting.
I love lifting heavy weights.
And so that was a really rough
transition for me because,
you know, sometimes you're...
A lot of times with young kids,
they get sick and
you can't just, you know,
take them to the gym, to
the day-care, to whatever.
And so you do have to adjust and
you have to do things from home.
And I think just having
that radical acceptance of,
like, this is how my life is,
This is what I've chosen.
And, yes, like, I,
I chose to have these kids
and my life has changed because
of it and it's really hard,
but that means
that I can still be healthy,
I just have to adapt.
I can still be fit, but
I just have to adapt
and it's going to look different
and that's okay,
because if you just hold yourself
to these unrealistic expectations
of, you know, four
perfect workouts a week,
your kids are going to throw
a curveball at you
that's not going to
make that happen,
and if you get upset or frustrated
or feel like a failure
because of it,
you're that much likely
to quit on your health
and fitness journey
rather than adjusting, adapting,
having different expectations
and continuing forward.
You're going to be so much more
successful that way
by just adapting.
It's, you know, adapt or die,
like me and Corey say.
You know, you mentioned,
you know, the mindset
and I completely agree with you.
How do you deal with the emotional
load of parenting and pregnancy?
Because that is, it's
an entirely new thing
that a lot of people have
never had to do before.
If it's your first pregnancy,
it's a whole other ball game.
Mm. So, when it comes
to mental health,
what should you know and what do you
need to do to deal with it?
Ooft. Yeah, that's a big topic.
And, you know, I feel, like,
at the end of the day,
we can have these tools
and we can have these,
you know, things that
we hope will help,
but, you know, if you can
get the extra support
that you need from a
therapist or a psychiatrist,
I highly recommend doing
that through pregnancy,
through your early
parenting journey.
But the little things that can help
is just allowing yourself
to feel those feelings.
Um, during pregnancy,
and especially in those, like,
early trenches of parenthood,
you're going to have big feelings.
Your hormones alone are going
to be worse
than they were during puberty.
So, like your emotions
are just wild.
They're out of this world
and so accepting it for what it is,
being like, "Okay, I am having these
huge emotions today.
"Totally okay. How can I take care
of myself in this moment?"
And that's a question
that I often ask myself a lot,
especially during pregnancy.
I feel like this time around
has been a little bit easier,
I think also just because I'm taking
care of a toddler at this point,
so I have less time to, like, sit in
my feelings, um, to be honest.
But it's really helpful just to try
and check in with yourself
and not be mad at yourself
for feeling that way,
not be mad of yourself for,
you know, crying during a
commercial that doesn't seem
that big of a deal, but your
emotions are all over the place
and just be, like, "Okay,
like, I'm pregnant. It's cool.
"How can I take care
of myself today?"
How do you feel like self-talk plays
a role in finding this balance?
Do you do you feel
like it's pretty impactful?
Oh, it's huge. Um,
I feel like self-talk,
cos you're sitting in your
pregnancy for nine months,
and a lot of times there's
no-one to really talk to about.
I mean, you can talk to your
partner about it,
you can talk to your
friends about it,
but if they're not going
through it, it's really hard to,
like, really relay what's
going through your mind
and just how crazy you feel
and so you've really just
got yourself in your corner.
And if that corner
is super negative self-talk
and you're getting at
yourself for eating this
or not doing this
or sleeping too long,
it's just going to create this,
like, really negative environment
for you to marinate in
for the whole nine months.
Something that really helps me,
and I honestly
don't know if it's true,
but I like to think
that, like, my energy
is impacting my baby's energy
because we're literally, like,
incubating them, right?
And so if I'm super negative
and I'm thinking super negatively
and I'm coming at myself super
negatively thinking about, like,
my baby and how that impacts
my baby helps me, like,
"Okay, that's not what I want to
model for them.
"And I want them to
have a positive mindset
"and feel love and feel,
you know, acceptance."
So, that kind of, like,
snaps me out of it.
I, again, think that having
support during this time is super,
super beneficial and being able
to talk to other people as well,
because pregnancy really
does make you crazy.
Like, your emotions and your
hormones are all over the place
and it's okay to feel that way.
So, what are some tools
that you have to avoid burn-out?
Mm. Avoid burn-out...
I can't say that, you know,
I can completely avoid burn-out,
I think it happens to
most pregnant people,
most parents a lot of
the time, honestly.
But I think having a plan,
having a support system,
communicating your needs,
those are all, like, step one.
You know, just making
sure that the load
that you can share
is being shared
before you reach
that breaking point,
and then trying to make time
for the things that
make you feel human again.
So oftentimes, you know, our
focus is on those other humans
that we created, that
we're trying to take care of,
that we forget that
we're a person too.
And so if you can have those
quiet moments of grounding,
if you can, um, take time to do
a 20-minute walk by yourself,
uh, that's going to go
a really long way
just reminding yourself
that you're human,
that you're an individual
and that you have, uh, needs.
Um, I think that
that really helps me.
Uh, again, like I said, I really
hit the jackpot with my partner,
and we're really good
about creating time for each other
and communicating when we
need a little bit more time.
Um, something we do is check-ins
with each other.
So I'll say, like, if I see
that Corey is close to burn-out,
I'll ask him, "Hey,
where are you at?"
And he'll give me a scale
on 0 to 10, you know,
0 being like, I am completely empty,
I have nothing left.
Or, like, you know, 10, like,
I'm crushing it, I'm thriving.
And then he'll do the same
for me when he can see, you know,
the light fading in my eyes,
he'll ask me where I'm at.
And if we're at a higher percentage
than the other person,
then we'll, like, tell them to go
and lay down in a dark room
and we'll take over.
So again, I know that not
everyone's situation is like that,
but really communicating
with your circle,
whether that's your partner
or your parents or
your friends, just having,
you know, other people
who know that you may need
a little extra support on
those days really helps.
Yeah. It's so important
not only when you're pregnant,
I think just
generally speaking... Yeah!
..it is okay to ask for help
and it's okay to accept help.
That's a hard lesson to
learn sometimes, I think,
um, you know, especially
on a journey like this,
where it feels like you're
supposed to be perfect at all times
and the reality is you can't,
you won't.
And so when you're raising
a whole other human,
asking for help and being able
to accept help
is so incredibly important.
How do you feel like
coaching others intersects
with receiving support for you?
I think for me, um,
for one thing, it helps me,
um, be connected to the things
that I'm teaching, right?
So, if I'm talking to someone
about their habits and their,
you know, how to handle burn-out,
it helps remind me,
like, "Oh, yeah, like, this is
important for me too, because,
"you know, these are
the core principles."
So, I think that, you know, teaching
and practicing what I preach
is really important to me
and just being really
vulnerable with my clients,
letting them know, like, "Hey,
I've struggled with this too,
"and this is my experience
"and how I've come up on,
you know, overcome it."
I think also learning from
other people's experiences,
because parenting is going to look
so different for your clients
and for you and for
the people around you
and so hearing their experiences
and their struggles
and their challenges has really
helped me become a better coach
and also a better, you know,
parent because of it, for sure.
When I spoke with Emilee in our
last, uh, little interview episode,
I did a little bit of
a rapid fire question,
so I want to kind
of do that with you,
not questions itself, but just
a couple of quick answers.
What are your, let's say, top
three tips for pregnancy health?
Number one - take it day by day
and adjust expectations.
Not every day is going to
look the same.
Number two - listen to your body's
cues. Trust them. Honor them.
Number three - set yourself up
for easy choices the best you can.
What about three tips for
maintaining health
when you're parenting?
Number one - like I've talked
about a lot today,
establish your support
system and expectations,
communicate your needs.
Number two - adapt or die.
Change your routines.
Accept that this is your life
and it's different
and chasing your old life
is going to make you miserable.
And then number three - probably
plan ahead as best you can,
really try to set yourself
up for those hard days.
All right. Any advice for parents
or pregnant folks who
feel like they are failing?
I feel like the feeling of failure
comes from expectations,
whether they're from ourselves
or from societal pressures
and so I think
especially these days,
and the way that our world is
just having really healthy
boundaries around social media,
if you're feeling
like you are failing,
look at where that
comparison is coming from.
If you are feeling like you're
failing in your fitness journey
as a new time parent,
if you're only following
people on social media
who have no responsibilities,
no kids,
and have a completely
life set-up than you
and don't understand
what it's like to have kids,
maybe changing your
social media preferences
and the people that you follow
because you're comparing yourself
to people who are literally
not in your situation.
So, having really clear boundaries
and seeing where that feeling
of failure is coming from.
If it's your own expectations,
having radical acceptance
of what your life is like
and giving yourself
grace is really important.
Just being kind because what
you're doing is really hard.
Like, it's hard to change
your life to accommodate
a whole new human
and take care of them
and keep them alive
and make them happy.
And especially as mothers,
there's not a lot of
gratitude in what we do.
There really isn't
a lot of recognition.
It's just kind of expectations
from others and from your kid.
And so having that
gratitude for yourself,
having that grace and
adjusting your expectations
will help so you
don't feel like a failure.
And celebrating those small wins.
"Like, you know what?
"My kid is happy today.
My kid is fed today.
"I'm fed today. We are crushing it."
Um, because if you feel
like you're failing,
it's usually coming
from those expectations
from somewhere else for sure.
Any words of encouragement for
anyone struggling to balance it all?
It's hard. You're not going
to be perfect at it.
There's going to be
really rough days,
but you're doing something that
not a lot of people can do.
Um, it's really hard work.
And the fact that you
are still trying
and you're still showing up
for yourself and for your kids,
you're still creating goals
and you're, you know,
listening to stuff like this or
consuming content like this
shows that you're still trying to
show up for yourself
and just keep pushing forward.
Take it day by day.
Sometimes it might be two steps
forward and three steps back.
And that's just the way that life
works, especially with kids.
So, keep showing up, keep trying,
keep making small goals
and also celebrate
those little wins.
Amazing, amazing.
Heather, thank you
so much for being here
and speaking on such
an important topic.
I'm really glad you are here.
Just a reminder
to anybody who's listening,
if you'd like to work
with Heather or myself,
you can apply for coaching.
The link to do so is
in the show notes.
Um, you can also find it
at adamwrightfitness.com.
You don't have to be pregnant,
that's not a requirement.
Um, but if you are, that is
not a disqualification either.
Um, so I would love
to speak with you and,
um, and see if it's
a good fit for you,
so feel free to reach out to us.
Other than that, um,
thank you, guys, for listening.
We will be back next Saturday.
Heather, thanks again. Thanks for
having me. This has been great.
Thank you for tuning in to this
episode of Showing Up Anyway.
You can find it for free on Spotify
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I'm Coach Adam. Remember,
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keep showing up anyway.