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Tap to send me your reflections ♡ Imagine having a gentle yet powerful tool in your back pocket that you can use whenever you need some First Aid. A tool that's there for you, whatever situation you find yourself in - helping to manage feelings of overwhelm, overstimulation and dysregulation, as you navigate life's unpredictable changes. This self-guided emotional "first aid" technique is built around the mnemonic TONIC. In the episode we'll explore how these 5 stages: Time out, Options, Na...
Tap to send me your reflections ♡
Imagine having a gentle yet powerful tool in your back pocket that you can use whenever you need some First Aid. A tool that's there for you, whatever situation you find yourself in - helping to manage feelings of overwhelm, overstimulation and dysregulation, as you navigate life's unpredictable changes.
This self-guided emotional "first aid" technique is built around the mnemonic TONIC. In the episode we'll explore how these 5 stages: Time out, Options, Name, Intention, Compassion help us to recognise and nurture what we're feeling in the moment - and identify a way forward.
Join us as we explore the power of setting positive intentions and nurturing self-compassion. By focusing on simple affirmations like "I am safe" or "I am here," we connect mind and body to soothe the nervous system and encourage self-kindness, just as we would show to a loved one. Through physical gestures and written reflections, discover ways to cultivate a sense of warmth and care towards yourself.
As we embrace this new fortnightly rhythm to our podcast, I am so grateful for your support. Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to connect and share your reflections. I also invite you to sign up for my written reflections, offering a continuous source of support in your own journey.
***
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A space to settle in and listen, and see where the episode takes you. This inspiring, reflective podcast is an invitation to travel deeper, with compassionate self-enquiry.
Henny shares insights from her own life, alongside practices that help us connect with our inner wisdom, explore our relationship with change and find a greater sense of flow. Henny believes we all hold our own answers, so there are no one-size-fits-all solutions here. This is a space to be with what’s true for you, and to grow from there.
If you’re drawn to slowing down, listening in, and exploring what it means to live with greater authenticity, this podcast is for you. Guided by psychology, mindfulness, therapeutic coaching, flow journaling, and everyday compassion, we explore ideas that help us step further into our inner worlds, in order to shape the changes we seek in our outer worlds.
Speaker 1: There were so many
things that I have thought about
talking about today, maybe as a
result of changing the cadence
of this podcast to every
fortnight rather than every week
, which is what it's been for
the last few years.
Welcome to the Henny Flynn
podcast, the space for deepening
self-awareness with profound
self-compassion.
I'm Henny, I write, coach and
speak about how exploring our
inner world can transform how we
experience our outer world, all
founded on a bedrock of
self-love.
Settle in and listen and see
where the episode takes you.
Some of those thoughts have
come from you A beautiful
suggestion about doing an
episode on, about doing an
episode on what comfort really
feels like, what it means, and
for me, that sparks the thought
of what it feels like when we
resist it as well, and also the
distinction between comfort and
distraction.
So that is definitely something
that is going to come up during
this season.
There's also been a metaphor
that has been rolling around my
head for the last couple of
weeks, all to do with picking
blackberries, and I am certainly
planning on doing an episode on
that, and I will uh, I'll just
leave you with that little
teaser, um, and see, see what
that sparks for you, um, and and
actually what landed with me
came out of a few client
conversations and the
realization that maybe it's time
to do an episode that is
offering something really
practical, something that you
could potentially pick up and
use today pick up and use today
and it's something that I have
come to create or identify I
suppose might be a better word
as a technique for when you're
feeling overwhelmed,
overstimulated, dysregulated and
you need some really fast first
aid and you know, first aid for
me means something that we can
access ourselves.
Maybe it's something that
someone else can guide us
through if we're really, really
struggling.
So this could be something that
you might want to share with a
loved one, maybe share the
episode, or share the, the
practice that I'm going to talk
us through today, or share it
with friends as something that
they may also find useful.
So, when we are in this state of
absolute overwhelm, it can be
triggered by so many different
things.
It can be triggered by so many
different things.
Maybe there's a change that is
happening around you, maybe
grief, maybe loss of a job,
maybe the ending of a
relationship, something which is
feeling that it's external to
you and is directly impacting
you in a way in which you feel
as though you've got no control,
and that can feel incredibly
overwhelming.
The other aspect of overwhelm
is often when we've got more
choice than we might necessarily
want in that moment.
So it might be that we're
looking to make a change and all
of the options in front of us
just feel so vast, so
challenging, so big and brave,
and scary and hairy challenging,
um, so big and brave and scary
and hairy, that the our system
just falls into the state of
overwhelm, because actually
that's what keeps us stuck and
means that we then stop making
choices and and that, in a way,
takes the problem away, even
though it feels really, really
hard.
And, of course, the other
aspect of all of this is that it
might be a change that you're
actively seeking to make.
So maybe moving house or
creating a brand new way of
working, or, um, or maybe you're
the one leaving the
relationship, or you're the one
leaving the job role and moving
to something else.
You know, all of these things
can also create a sense of
overwhelm.
You know our system going oh
goodness me, how am I going to
cope Now in and amongst all of
this?
Maybe there's a sense of
feeling overstimulated as well.
Perhaps some of the stuff
that's happening around you is
just really, really intensely
stimulating your system.
We often use the language of
triggers and I know it's a
little bit overused, but it's
overused partly because it's
such a good word to describe
what it feels like in our system
when something is getting
intensely activated by something
else and that can lead to this
state of overstimulation.
And often what that can feel
like is when we are feeling
really, really sensitized.
Maybe something specific has
happened and our system hasn't
had a chance to process that, to
come back into homeostasis,
into a state of balance, and
we're still highly activated,
and therefore then small things
can feel like they're almost
like, uh, like you know, tiny
little, uh, pinpricks of things
that we might have managed in
the past can feel like they're,
you know, a knife coming into us
.
I mean, gosh, that's a really
horrible expression, isn't it?
But that is often how it feels,
um, that it feels like it's
something that's, like, you know
, that's cutting through into
our, like our deep, deep
sensitivity and, um, kind of
breaking through the um, what
might be feeling like a really
thin layer of protection around
us, and so we can feel really
overstimulated and then, and
then, alongside this, that other
sort of state of being that I
mentioned at the beginning is
this sense of being dysregulated
.
You know, often what we're
really looking for in in
psychological terms is is
regulation, uh, emotional
regulation, which is when we can
see that something is hard or
something is painful or
something um is really deeply,
deeply challenging, and we also
recognize that we are okay now.
Obviously, sometimes we're not
okay, we're genuinely in danger.
And that's when, you know our
system, our fight flight freeze,
our amygdala, our limbic system
.
You know that's when that's
what they're designed to do.
They're designed to keep us
safe, keep us alive, get us out
of danger, make us as safe as we
possibly can be when we are in
danger.
The challenge is, when we're
dysregulated is that that that
response to the world has got
really highly activated and so
our whole system feels out of
kilter and um, and we respond to
things, uh, in a way that is,
um, maybe out of proportion with
how we might have responded to
them if our system was, you know
, fully regulated, fully
regulated.
And you know, all three of
these things overwhelm,
overstimulation, dysregulation
they're really common.
You know they're not things to
beat ourselves up about.
And if you know, if you've
listened to the podcast, you'll
know that I've shared times when
that's absolutely been the case
for me.
There was one example in
particular where I had what I
believe has been my only panic
attack but memory can be a you
know, nebulous thing sometimes,
but I had a panic attack
climbing up a very, very steep,
very muddy slope.
Now my recognition is that other
things informed the way that I
responded to the fear, the
massive, massive fear that
suddenly overwhelmed me.
I recognize it goes back to
experiences I had as a child.
I recognize it goes back to
experiences that I've had, like
throughout my life, of not
listening to my inner voice.
Hence, you know, we teach what
we most need to learn like we
really need to listen to our
inner voice um, and, and it
overwhelmed me, on that muddy
slope I say muddy slope, it was
really steep and there was,
there was literally nothing to
hold on to and and I just felt
like I was falling off the earth
.
I mean, that's literally the
experience I had.
If you've ever had that kind of
experience before you'll you'll
recognize it.
If you've not experienced it, it
might sound incredibly dramatic
and and you know, unnecessarily
um, you know, um, oh, I don't,
yeah, dramatic, but the
experience of it in my body was
absolutely terrifying and I mean
, I genuinely felt I was falling
off off the earth.
I had to, like, cling on to the
mud, um and uh, and try and
stop that from happening.
And so you know, we have all
had our own versions of
experiences that have left us
feeling overwhelmed,
overstimulated, dysregulated.
And so this mnemonic came to me
when I was helping someone that
I love very much to navigate an
experience that they were
having, and I haven't really
shared it that widely.
I've been kind of observing its
use.
I've been observing how I've
been able to use it, not
necessarily at times when I've
been like so overstimulated or
so overwhelmed that it's that
the first aid has been really,
really vital, but more I've been
using it to see, okay, if I'm
kind of like edging towards
something, how does this
mnemonic help me here?
And I've also been observing it
with the people that I have
shared it with.
That I have shared it with, and
you know that's a lovely thing
to remember because you know, in
very uh, you know sort of
Victorian times, you know taking
a tonic when you um, when you
weren't feeling a hundred
percent, you know that's a very
um, that was a very uh, common
um, sort of tool that people
used.
What was in those tonics might
have been a little bit, might
not necessarily recommend them
now, but, um, you know the the
concept of tonic and the concept
of tonic water, of course, was
that it had quinine in it and
and people who traveled out to
India during the time of the Raj
you know they drank tonic water
because it had quinine and that
meant that they were a little
more protected against malaria.
So hopefully it's a word that
is familiar with us and I think
there's something rather neat
about this idea that when we
need first aid we can take a
tonic.
The T stands for timeout, the O
stands for options, the N for
name, I for intention and C for
compassion Tonic, timeout,
options, name, intention,
compassion.
And I'll just talk us through
what is involved in each of
those five stages.
And they are stages and the
intention is that you follow
them one by one, because my
sense that that is what helps
our system come into a state of
regulation, a state of where
that overstimulation settles and
where we can create a little
bit of distance from what might
be overwhelming us and then be
able to see, well, what could be
my best way forward.
So clearly it's not a magic
wand we still need to hold
ourselves in a way that means
that we are caring for ourselves
rather than abandoning
ourselves, which is often what
happens.
Caring for ourselves rather
than abandoning ourselves, which
is often what happens when we
are in a high state of anxiety.
There's this sense of
self-abandonment, but just by
following this mnemonic tonic,
we are acknowledging what we're
experiencing and by doing that,
we are turning toward ourselves
and and that, for me, is, is one
of the most powerful things
that we can do.
And from there, I think it's
amazing how we can see that
there are choices ahead of us
that we could take that are
different from, perhaps, what
we're feeling in that moment.
So the T for time out, it
basically means take yourself
out of the situation in whatever
way you can.
Now that could mean going to a
quiet space, going outside If
you're in a group, then stepping
back, like physically just
taking a small step back just to
give yourself a little bit more
space around you, or even
mentally creating some space, a
pause around you, so kind of
stepping inward and and
hopefully that that's if that
kind of resonates with you, this
idea that, like we kind of
realize that all of our energy
is like pushing out.
Pushing out because we're like,
we're desperately trying to
push away the stuff that is
making us feel so uncomfortable,
and and really this idea of
stepping inward and creating a
time out for ourself, creating
some space within us, even if
we're not able to physically
create some space around us,
means just releasing some of
that, that pressure that we've
been applying to pushing
everything else away, and
recognizing that actually within
us is infinite space and we can
just step in.
That doesn't mean dissociating,
it doesn't mean stepping so far
in that we lose contact with
the outside world.
It's simply an inward action.
And actually, even as I'm doing
it I kind of wish I was
videoing this actually, but even
as I'm doing it there is this
very slight movement of my torso
, just a very slight shift back,
and that can give us that
moment of overwhelm over
stimulation, dysregulation,
anxiety, whatever it is that
you're really like facing into,
really like struggling with.
Maybe there's an opportunity to
create a time out
geographically, you know, take
yourself to a different space
physically, literally by
stepping back, or internally, by
just just coming inward a
little bit, maybe sort of
creating or recognizing that you
have some boundaries in place
that perhaps you'd forgotten
were there.
The other thing about the time
out is also to put away any
distractions you've been using
to avoid attending to what
you're feeling.
So this is really important
because often when we're in that
state, um of like overwhelm,
etc.
We might not have recognized
that we're moving toward that
state.
It might have just either like
whoosh, like landed on us or
very possibly it's a state we've
been slowly moving toward in a
kind of mindless way, like we
haven't been paying attention to
what we're feeling, we've been
suppressing the inner voice,
we've been not listening to
ourselves, not listening to the
cues that we're picking up from
around us, and we might find
that we've started using
distractions more so phones,
classic, you know.
We might find that we're
scrolling on Instagram or
Facebook or whatever your, your
metier is, um we might find, uh,
that you've been working longer
hours, um, working on stuff
that really didn't need quite
the amount of attention that
you've been giving it.
Maybe, elongating the length of
time, something's been taking,
um, subconsciously, of course,
um, maybe, uh, maybe you've um
just been like zoning out in
front of the telly.
That's definitely an a pattern
of mine.
Hence we've now got rid of our
tv, which is a whole other
podcast episode.
But, um, you know that would
that was definitely an old
pattern of mine was just like
zoning out, and so I would.
I came to understand that if I
was walking into the lounge,
switching off on the telly,
slumping down and just zoning
out or you know, to whatever was
on, that was a very clear sign
to me that that something wasn't
right.
I was, you know, over
overstimulated in some way, or
or exhausted maybe.
So part of this time out of
tonic is to put away those
distractions you've been using
to avoid attending to what
you're feeling.
It doesn't mean putting them
away forever.
This isn't binary, this isn't
this or that.
It's just put them away for the
moment.
Just pay some attention to
yourself in the most loving way,
okay.
So next comes options.
The o of tonic is options, and
this is so vital because when
we're in that stuck place, it
can sometimes feel as though
like the whole world has like
fallen in around us and we have
no options, or it can feel like
everything has left us so
exposed that we've got way too
many options to deal with.
So part of the options is
recognizing that you have them
and being really clear with
yourself that you can either
carry on feeling as you are or
you can choose another path
forward.
So it's not about oh my God,
all these options around this
thing.
That is like filling my vision.
It's more about recognizing
that you have options about how
you're feeling.
When we consciously choose to
attend to how we're feeling,
that is choosing or
acknowledging our agency, and I
think I think there's there's a
subtlety here that is really,
really important, because what
we're not doing is saying I
shouldn shouldn't be feeling
this way, I must be feeling
another way, and kind of trying
to like force ourselves, which
really doesn't work.
Or putting a, you know, a
rose-tinted veil over everything
and just pretending that it's
all okay.
That was definitely one of mine
.
That, um, that tone of voice
that came up, um, you know, this
is about really noticing.
So you've taken the time out
which gives you the opportunity
to recognize that you have some
options here, and just by taking
the time out, of course, you're
already activating one of those
options that's available for
you, which is to take time out.
So if that is all that's
available for you, just to
notice that, then you're
beginning to notice your own
sense of agency, and that's
incredibly powerful when things
are overwhelming.
Now the N of tonic is to name,
to name what you're feeling.
There is so much evidence
around this and if you're
familiar with the work of Tara
Brack, you'll know the RAIN
mnemonic, and part of that RAIN
mnemonic is to recognize and
through that is actually to name
what you're feeling.
So this is really important.
We name what we're feeling
either to a trusted other or to
yourself, or to something
greater than you, depending on
what your sense of your
spiritual connection is or your
connection with a higher self, a
higher other.
You may choose to name it to
the universe, to the angels, to
god, to the goddess, um, to all
the gods you know, whatever it
might be for you, um, I, I like
to um, invite all of them in I'm
, I'm hedging all of my bets,
you know.
So, um.
So you name what you're feeling
and if you don't have that
sense of connection with a
divine other, that's okay,
because the divine is also
within you.
So name it to yourself.
Or find someone that you really
, really love and trust, someone
who you know isn't going to try
and fix things, and name it to
them.
Just ask them if they will just
listen while you name it.
Name what you're feeling, name
the feelings.
Now.
Maybe journaling everything
you're noticing can be, you know
, something that might really
really help you.
I find that incredibly useful
myself.
Of course, that's why I wrote
the book in the flow journaling
your inner wisdom.
It's why I journal myself.
It's it's why the very first
episode in this whole podcast
series is about journaling.
So journaling for me is a
really powerful pathway to
naming what is going on within
me.
If that's not for you,
absolutely okay.
If it is for you, brilliant, go
try it, so you can either write
it down or you can say the
emotions and feelings one by one
, out loud or in your head, like
if you, if your sense of time
out, you're in a busy space,
then you might just want to name
it in your head, because maybe
it doesn't feel available to you
to say it out loud in front of
the people that you're with, or
you haven't got privacy to be
able to do it them one by one,
like giving each one the space.
So I am feeling lost, okay,
okay, I'm feeling lost.
I'm feeling angry.
Okay, I'm feeling angry.
I'm feeling frightened.
Okay, I'm feeling frightened.
Okay, I'm feeling frightened,
like, whatever those feelings
are like, and your language will
be your language, but that is
my.
My approach is to name it and
then, and then to kind of just
like, okay, I acknowledge that's
there.
And what this does is it helps
the parts of you experiencing
the negative feelings feel heard
.
This is so important.
We all have these different
parts in us and so often what
we've been taught through our
experience in life and you know,
and it's been taught to us
often by very loving caregivers
is that negative feelings are
horrible to have and so we
suppress them.
And often people who love us
don't like it when we're feeling
negative things because it
makes them feel bad and so we
suppress them.
Um, what can?
What can happen then, of course
, is that these negative
feelings they feel they have to
shout to get our attention.
So when you name what you're
feeling, you're acknowledging
the experience that these parts
of you are having.
It means they feel heard.
They don't have to shout so
loudly to get your attention.
And if you notice, we're not
trying to fix anything, we're
not trying to change anything
here.
That's, I think this is one of
the reasons why this mnemonic
tonic is so powerful, because
it's it's allowing ourselves to
be with what's going on and
recognize that we have agency
and and that gives us a sense of
forward motion and and for me,
I think this this really relates
to the reason why I describe
myself as a therapeutic coach,
because this work, this deep,
deep, deep, loving work, is also
it's about being with and
acknowledging and understanding
and recognizing, and it's about
this forward attention to okay
and and how can I best support
myself here?
And that's really where the eye
of intention comes in.
So, tonic, time out options,
name intention and we set an
intention that clearly states
how we wish to feel.
An intention, as I'm sure you
already know, is a short,
positive statement in the
present tense, such as I am calm
, or I am safe, or I am okay, or
simply I am here.
It could be whatever you want.
I think there is something
really powerful, particularly
when we're in this kind of state
of we're moving out of this
state of overwhelm,
overstimulation, dysregulation,
it's really helpful to keep it
short, because that feels
achievable.
When we start trying to
overcomplicate it, to make it
encompass all things, our head
can get too involved and we can
start getting a bit lost in it.
So set a really simple
intention, such as I am okay, I
am safe.
That's one of mine, I am safe.
And repeat it three times, if
you can, and if you could see me
now, you'll know.
You know I'm doing this right
now.
If you can place your hand on
your heart and whisper it to
yourself, or say it like as
loudly as you can, you know,
depending upon where you are, or
just say it to yourself in your
own mind, this helps to calm
your whole system, creating an
opportunity for your brain and
your body to start to reconnect
and for them to begin to believe
what you're saying.
Often, when we're in this state
of high anxiety, it's like we're
disconnected from our body and
our brain.
You know what's going on in our
head, you know like this fierce
desire to uh, to protect
ourselves, has gone into
overdrive and and we've started
ignoring what's going on in the
body, which is one of the
reasons why the body can then,
like, cry out and say listen to
me, and that's when we can, you
know, collapse, like what
happened to me on that muddy
slope.
So, with this intention, we're
placing a hand on our heart, or
hand on our belly, you know, or
both.
That's so lovely, um, and we're
simply saying I am safe, I am
safe, I am safe, or whatever
your intention is, and you can
say it more than three times,
you can keep saying it to
yourself, you say it as often
and as many times as feels okay,
as feels right, as feels useful
for you, calming your system
and really listening to the
words as you say them like,
really listening to the words.
And that's why, sometimes, an
intention like I am here might
be the best one that we can use,
because it might not feel true
to say I am safe, or it might
not feel true to begin to set
the intention of I am calm, but
beginning with something like I
am here, there's an absolute
truth about that.
I am here, I am here, I am here
, and just even in those words,
we can start to hear the voice
of our inner wisdom, our wisest,
kindest self.
The part that I talk about in
in the flow, the, the journaling
book around that.
It's that voice that often
shows up in our journal.
So I am here is a way of
letting all these frightened
parts of us know that within us
is self with a capital S Wise,
kind self.
And then, lastly, with tonic, we
come to compassion.
Of course, of course.
Of course it's compassion how
could it be anything else, and
the most vital thing is be
compassionate towards yourself.
Being cross or frustrated or
ashamed of how we've been
feeling simply adds another
layer to the negative feelings.
We're just ramping it up when
we start to beat ourselves up
about something that we've been
feeling.
So this comes back to this.
This the o of tonic, in that we
have options, we can choose
something different, and that
something different can be
compassion toward ourselves.
You know, the principle here is
to extend the same kindness to
yourself as you would to a loved
one.
That's Dr Kristen Neff's
definition of self-compassion.
And the thing is that within
compassion, woven deeply within
that word, is this sense of
wanting to help, wanting to
provide some kind of support to
the person that we're extending
compassion to.
And so, therefore, when we're
compassionate toward ourselves,
we're extending that same sense
of wanting to, to be useful,
wanting to help, wanting to be
supportive in some way.
And we're not.
We're not compassion in this
sense.
It doesn't mean pretending that
everything's okay sense.
It doesn't mean pretending that
everything's okay or being
compassionate towards ourselves
because we want to feel better.
We're extending this compassion
in recognition that things are
feeling hard, and that is really
important.
And I think it's something that
often gets missed when we talk
about compassion or talk about
self-compassion.
It's really understanding that
it is an active you know an
active practice.
Um, you know an active practice
.
It's.
It's not a way of avoiding the
reality of what we're
experiencing.
It's a way of being really
fully present with what we're
experiencing, with the deepest
love that we can extend to
ourselves.
So, the deepest love that we
can extend to ourselves.
So, if needed, you know, within
this, this part of uh tonic,
this first aid, keep your hand
on your heart.
I've had my hand on my heart
the whole time I've been talking
to you, of course, and what
this does is when we place our
hand on our heart.
The body doesn't know the
difference between when we
extend a loving gesture like
this toward ourself or to
somebody else.
It's like giving ourselves a
hug.
The body doesn't know that it's
not coming from somewhere else
and and what it does is it means
that we're we're demonstrating
the depth of our affection
toward ourself, just as we might
if we came across a friend who
was in pain, struggling with
something.
And this hand on your heart, it
helps to release oxytocin, which
is the caregiving hormone.
It's the hormone that nursing
mothers release after their
child is born, and it's the
bonding hormone and and so it's
a way of like extending this
extreme care toward ourself and
and that's what happens is
oxytocin starts to move through
our system and that helps reduce
the levels of cortisol and
adrenaline, which may have been
firing up, will have been firing
up when you were feeling
overwhelmed, overstimulated,
dysregulated, and when you're in
this compassion phase of tonic,
obviously, you can keep
repeating your intention
whenever you need a reminder, a
reminder, and the invitation
here is to practice this, maybe
to practice it when something
just feels a little bit off
kilter within you.
Just see how it is to take a
tonic timeout options.
A tonic timeout options name,
intention, compassion.
See how your body feels at the
beginning and at the end.
And the more that we practice
this way of attending to
ourselves, the more we build the
muscle memory that reminds us
that we are able to attend to
ourselves.
So in those times when we're
feeling so, so overwhelmed, so
stuck, so lost, so anxious, we
can remember oh yeah, I have
this, I have this tonic, I can
take this tonic.
I understand this tonic, I
understand how it will help me
and even if it just gives us a
tiny, tiny little inward shift,
away from those feelings that
have been dominating our vision,
our experience, that tiny shift
can be such an enormous step
towards making a choice that is
going to serve us better.
You know, one small step for
man, one small step for mankind,
one giant leap, rather, one
giant leap for mankind.
You know, it's this idea, that,
um, because often, when we are,
when we are in such a place of
of anxiety, when when it feels
like there are no options
available for us, there are no
options available for us simply
understanding that we can
exercise a choice to practice
tonic, to take tonic breaks,
that belief that might be
forming with you know, the
belief could be I can't do
anything, I don't know what to
do, I can never fix this, I can
never change this, whatever
those those thoughts might be
recognizing that oh, hang on a
minute, there is something.
I can never fix this, I can
never change this, whatever
those those thoughts might be
recognizing that, oh, hang on a
minute, there is something I can
do and it's really
straightforward and I can talk
myself through it or I could ask
a loved one to talk me through
it.
So I do recommend sharing this
um, and and just going through
this with you has been really
useful for me, actually noticing
the shift in my own body as
I've talked you through it.
Maybe you've noticed that too.
Maybe you've sensed a shift in
your system, a kind of
recognition that these things
are available to you, and
hopefully, the mnemonic tonic
mnemonic tonic that's nice,
isn't it?
Hopefully the mnemonic tonic
feels something, something that,
um, you can just keep with you.
It's like uh, it's like a thing
to pop in your back pocket, um,
and you know, maybe it's
something that you write down,
time out, options, name,
intention, compassion so that
you have it to hand and you can
remember oh, yeah, okay, I just
need to take some time out,
create a bit of space around me.
Remember, I have some options
about how I'm feeling.
Just by doing this, I'm making
a choice.
I can name what I'm feeling,
giving each feeling some space.
I can set a clear and simple
intention for how I wish to feel
and I can be compassionate
toward myself about what's going
on.
You know, for me that sounds
immensely useful, and hopefully
it does for you too.
I'm going to share more about
this tonic.
I'm going to share more about
this tonic.
Um, maybe, maybe we have a um,
yeah, it might turn into an uh
insight timer um course,
actually, or uh, um, an event
that you could come along and
practice it with me.
Maybe practice it in pairs, or
practice it with me.
Let's see.
Let's see where those thoughts
go, but for now I hope you find
it useful.
I'd love to hear your
reflections on it.
Of course, I always love to
hear from people.
So, um, do, do, let me know.
You can always email me, henny,
at hennyflynncouk.
And I think the other sort of
connecting thread here is, if
you aren't yet signed up to the
mailing list, then I share lots
of really wonderful things that
can be incredibly useful, either
as self-reflection points,
which is often what the podcast
is about, or these very
practical bits of guidance,
things to experiment with.
And, of course, I also share
everyday compassion.
Now, if you don't yet receive
it, I highly recommend it.
Of course I do, but it is such
a beautiful thing and I'm so
grateful to the inspiration that
led to the creation of Everyday
Compassion.
Basically, it's an email that
you'll get four times a week
Monday, tuesday, thursday,
friday.
Incredibly easy to read, so
short couple of sentences, maybe
not even that, maybe just a few
words, all written, all created
to help activate that sense of
self-compassion.
You don't have to do anything
with them.
They're so easy to read and
they're designed to bring a
sense of ease, and if that's
something that you would love to
find out more about, to have
coming into your inbox, then
there's a link in the podcast
notes, in the show notes, and
also, just come along to
hennyflynncouk and you can just
sign up on there as well.
Or, if you want to, you can
literally just send me an email
and let me know that you'd like
to get it and I can make that
happen for you.
Um, okay, my darlings, so I
think that's probably enough
from me for today, and I really,
really loved being with you
here.
I really did.
I'm so glad I've moved the
podcast to this fortnightly
cadence.
It feels it feels really
perfect, and I've had so much
lovely feedback from people
telling me that it feels right
and how grateful they are that
I've acknowledged that this is
important for me and that that
is also helping them in some way
acknowledge what's important
for them and the ways that they
can best show up in the worlds
that they inhabit.
So it was a bit scary, I have
to say, and if you listen to the
episode on it.
You'll know it was a bit scary,
but it feels absolutely right.
And, and if you sign up to the
mailing list, you'll get
notification of when the new
episodes come.
And you'll also get a written
piece every alternate Sunday.
A reflection, because for me it
is all about the word written
and spoken.
Um, that's been a recent
realization, but of course, of
course it's always been true,
but I think I've only just
really named it.
So anyway, I'm sending so much
love and I'm sending a hug and a
wave.
Thank you.