Subscribe
Share
Share
Embed
A Shovavim series learning a Torah approach to shmiras einayim and shmiras habris, with practical tools and perspectives.
Enjoyed? Your feedback means a lot to us. Click here to email us: https://tinyurl.com/thanksEN
We're in the series of the טהר לבנו,
part six.
Last week we spoke about הסר שטן מלפנינו ומאחרינו,
which means that we have a יצר הרע who comes ahead of time and
he says to us,
"Go do the עבירה," and that one we're more familiar with.
We also have a יצר הרע who comes after the fact,
after a person has sinned,
and he comes to knock you down and to say you're not worth anything.
And say,
"Look at you,
you did that,
you're pathetic.
You don't have the right to be in ישיבה,
you don't have the right to call yourself a בן תורה,
you don't have the right to be Jewish,
you're not wanted."
And that emotional murder that the יצר הרע does to a person afterwards,
that destruction of the self-esteem that he does afterwards,
that's even more painful and more damaging than the actual sin.
There's two different words for feeling guilty.
I'm going to use them in this context and call one shame and one
guilt.
And we'll try and define them in the following way:
that if a person feels guilt about something bad that he did,
that's healthy.
But if a person feels shame about what he did,
that's unhealthy.
What's the difference between feeling guilt and feeling shame?
When a person did something bad and he feels guilty about what he did,
then he says,
"I know I'm a good person.
I know that I'm worthy.
I know that I'm loved.
But this act that I did is not fitting for who I am.
I'm fine,
the act that I did is not okay."
And therefore I feel bad,
I feel uncomfortable,
I don't feel like I should be associated with doing this,
I feel awkward.
I'm wearing a piece of clothing that doesn't fit me,
it's something external to me and it's not fitting me.
It's not מתאים.
I feel guilty about it,
and therefore I'm going to take that piece of clothing off because it's not
to be associated with me.
That's healthy.
That's when a person who sins,
he still knows that he's good in his essence,
he identifies that what he did was bad,
and therefore he wants to remove it.
It's taking action,
it leads him to take action.
The fact that he feels guilt is productive because it makes him want to
get rid of that sin.
Feeling guilty is healthy.
It helps a person remove the negativity,
take off the clothing that doesn't fit.
Feeling ashamed is unhealthy.
Feeling ashamed is where a person doesn't associate the bad with the action,
but he associates the bad with himself.
He says,
"If I did that,
then I'm unworthy.
That signifies who I am."
You can tell in a person's language,
how they speak,
which way they view their sin.
Some people will say,
"I can't believe I did that.
I don't know where that came from.
That was so inappropriate."
That's healthy.
They still see themselves as good,
they see the sin as arbitrary,
random,
they feel bad about it,
they're looking for a way to ensure that it won't happen again.
They feel guilty about it,
and therefore they're taking steps to make sure it won't happen again,
because they know they're good.
When a person's response to sin is,
"Here we go again.
I kind of knew it was going to happen.
It had to happen.
That's just that's just how I am," and he's associated the bad with himself
and he feels ashamed,
there's no way out as far as he's concerned.
It just reconfirms what he already knew:
that he's a sinner at essence.
And therefore,
why would he change?
How can he change?
It's just who he is.
And he feels he's gone.
And one of the major goals of the יצר הרע is that you associate
the bad with yourself.
It's almost as if he says to you,
I don't know if you've ever heard about when the police do interrogation about
someone who didn't do something,
but they need someone to blame.
So here's a case study,
a real case that happened.
There was a person in America who went out late at night to do
things that בני ישיבה—he wasn't Jewish,
but he went out to do things that בני ישיבה don't do late at
night.
And he came back very,
very late,
and he found that his mother had been killed in the house.
And he was standing there,
and there was no one around,
he didn't know what happened,
and he called the police.
The police came,
and they saw him standing there with the mother who was dead,
and they said "What happened?"
And he started telling it,
and he said they said,
"Come with us."
And they started interrogating him.
And they said,
"How was your relationship with your mother?"
And he said,
"It wasn't so good."
He said,
"Did you get into fights?"
He said,
"Yes.
What does this got to do with anything?"
And they said,
"No,
tell us.
We're just trying to understand the situation,
the whole situation."
And they kept asking questions.
And they asked him questions,
and it started going the questions started going,
"Is there any part of you that feels like happy that she is no
longer in the world?"
And he says,
"There's a part of me,
but that's not the point,
though.
I'm just I came to report it."
He says,
"So there's a part of you that feels that she's hap- you're happy that
she's no longer in the world?"
And he said,
"Yeah,
but..."
"And tell tell tell me when when that happened,
that was there a part of you that was happy that it happened?"
He says,
"No,
like,
who wants someone to die,
but..."
"But was there a part of you?"
"Yes."
"And how was she killed?
Well,
there was a knife.
Could you see yourself feeling the knife?
Could you see yourself wanting to hold that knife?
Did you ever think of yourself,
I would like to do such a thing?"
And they kept asking and asking and an hour and two hours and three
hours,
and at some point he said like,
"I don't think I did it,
but we're going through this imagery so much,
I'm beginning to think that maybe it did happen."
And after four hours of interrogation,
they labeled him as guilty for his mother's murder,
and he spent two years in jail.
He had a lifetime sentence,
but he spent two years in jail until someone else was arrested for a
murder and without interrogation,
that other person admitted that he'd killed that woman that time.
And they reopened the case,
and they found that he wasn't guilty and it was a forced admission,
and they let him go.
Real case that happened.
Read in a book that was lent to me last year by one of
the בחורים in the ישיבה,
"Don't Split the Difference".
Recommended reading for outside of סדר time.
That's an example of exactly what the יצר הרע does.
You didn't do anything wrong.
You're innocent,
totally innocent.
The יצר הרע starts saying to you,
"But isn't there a side of you,
or a part of you,
on some level wants to do something bad?"
And you get confused because he talks again and again and he speaks in
a gentle voice and he makes you feel that he cares and he loves
and you're getting confused about what's you and what's him and who's him and
who's you,
and you're not sure that if you did anything wrong or you didn't do
anything wrong and then until the point where you say,
"I did it."
And then,
you did it!
You're in jail.
That's it.
You're a goner.
You did it.
You did the עבירה.
You admitted you did it.
That's who you are.
That's the יצר הרע's main objective.
And therefore,
the goal of today's שיעור is not to bring ווארטלאך,
not to bring גימטריאות,
I'm not even going to quote anything from חסידות today.
We're going to learn the גמרא,
and we're going to learn the ראשונים to have the answer to the יצר
הרע.
Because people get confused in this matter:
I'm good,
I'm bad,
Hashem loves me,
Hashem doesn't love me,
I'm the problem.
And then in that moment of weakness,
because they don't have clarity halachically about how Hashem views us,
halachically about how Hashem views us,
and they say,
"I'm already a bad person,
I'm already sinning,
like what hope is there for me?"
And they do a very,
very bad thing,
that they say,
"Hashem doesn't want to accept me anymore,
Hashem doesn't love me anymore."
And why is that such a bad thing?
Because they believe Hashem when He says that it's considered an עבירה,
but they don't believe Hashem when He says that He wants you to come
back.
Who says that action is a bad action to begin with?
Who said?
Who said?
The secular world doesn't say these actions are bad actions.
So who said these these things are called sins?
Who said?
Hashem said!
That's why it's bad.
You're only feeling guilty because Hashem said that it's bad.
The same Hashem who said that it's bad,
the same One,
He also said that He still loves you,
you're still His child,
you can come back,
it's never too late.
So it's extremely inappropriate,
in God's name,
to come and say,
"No,
like I've got some תורה source that says that this type of sin is
too far and it's too gone and I'm a lost case."
Extremely inappropriate,
because the only reason why you're feeling guilty is because God says,
and the same God says to come back.
So therefore,
I just want to learn גמרא,
ראשונים,
and see sources to reinstill the faith,
the deep faith,
that I can always come back,
there's no such concept as as I've gone too far.
And that will give us the ability that no matter how far we've gone
and no matter what we've done,
we'll always view it as external.
We will feel guilty,
healthy to feel guilty.
I don't want to associate with those bad things,
I feel bad about it,
I'm going to come back,
but we'll never feel ashamed.
We'll never feel that it's associated with our very self.
The פסוק in ירמיהו says,
"שובו בנים שובבים.
Come back,
My sons.
You've misbehaved."
The גמרא in קידושין דף ל״ו brings four separate פסוקים to say that we're
בנים.
But it brings a מחלוקת.
Are we really בנים,
or are we not בנים?
What's the difference between בנים and a בעל ואישה.
You know,
it's interesting,
when חז״ל call someone who does sins,
someone who does sins a lot,
they call him a בעל עבירה.
בעל עבירה.
They don't call him a בן עבירה.
When they speak about עולם הבא,
they someone is,
they call someone a בן עולם הבא.
They don't call someone a בעל עולם הבא.
What's the difference?
Why by עבירה are we called a בעל עבירה,
someone who does a lot of sins,
but by עולם הבא,
the good side,
there it's not called בעל,
it's called a בן?
בן ישיבה,
that's the name of the book,
right?
They didn't call it בעל ישיבה,
they call it בן ישיבה.
So,
I want to mention the name of a צדיק,
who wasn't חסידיש,
my father-in-law,
עליו השלום,
who passed away three,
five years ago,
five years ago this last month,
he was still alive at my son's בר מצוה.
My son is now לשנה ג׳.
He was still alive at that time.
And I asked,
I asked all members of the family to write a דבר תורה,
as well as they're probably going to speak over the שבת,
but to also write up a דבר תורה with the goal of printing it
up and presenting to my son like a little booklet of all the דברי
ברכה and דברי תורה that all the members of the family wrote.
I never did it.
I mean,
I have all the,
I've never printed it yet,
but I've got,
I've got all the דברי תורה.
I have them.
Maybe for his wedding,
I'll print them up,
בעזרת השם.
One day I will get to it.
But I want to share with you the דבר תורה that my father-in-law said
to my son at his בר מצוה.
He asked the question that we just asked:
Why by an עבירה is it called a בעל עבירה,
but by עולם הבא it's called a בן עולם הבא?
And he said that the relationship between a husband and a wife,
ideally,
will last forever,
but it's not inherent.
There can be a divorce.
The relationship between a father and a son is inherent;
there's no such thing as a divorce.
So,
between a husband and a wife,
if we're calling the relationship between עם ישראל and Hashem the relationship of a
husband and a wife,
that's problematic.
The Christians would say that about us.
The Christians would say that we're a husband and a wife,
and if we behave well,
good,
and if we don't behave well,
then there can be a divorce.
But הקדוש ברוך הוא doesn't say that:
בנים אתם לה׳
אלקיכם.
He doesn't call us an אישה;
he calls us a בן.
And the חז״ל,
they have a מחלוקת on this matter.
Can it be that Hashem would divorce us,
or could it not be?
Is our relationship one of an עבירה,
a בעל עבירה,
that you can divorce from the עבירה,
or is our relationship like a בן,
that you can never divorce,
you can never separate?
And it's a מחלוקת in the גמרא,
קידושין דף ל״ו:
תניא בנים אתם לה׳
אלקיכם בזמן שאתם נוהגים מנהג בנים אתם קרויים בנים אין אתם נוהגים מנהג בנים
אין אתם קרויים בנים דברי רבי יהודה.
רבי יהודה says the word בנים is לאו דווקא.
He's not making the דיוק of a בן versus a בעל.
He says,
you're בנים if you're acting like a בן,
and if you're not acting like a בן,
you're not a בן.
That's the way רבי יהודה says.
רבי מאיר אומר בין כך ובין כך אתם קרויים בנים.
The word בנים means you're בנים.
It means that you can't divorce.
Doesn't matter how you behave,
and I will prove it to you from four different פסוקים.
Number one,
ירמיהו:
בנים סכלים המה.
Number two,
דברים:
בנים לא אמון בם.
Number three,
ישעיהו:
זרע מרעים בנים משחיתים.
Number four,
הושע:
והיה במקום אשר יאמר להם לא עמי אתם יאמר להם בני קל חי.
The גמרא says,
you don't need to bring more than one פסוק to prove that you're בנים.
Why did you bring four פסוקים?
Says the גמרא,
מאי ואומר,
why do you need four?
Because there are people who will come along in the name of the יצר
הרע,
and they'll say,
בנים for nice people,
but not for you.
בנים for good people,
but not for you.
You don't come into the category of בנים.
There's no room in גיהנם for you.
They have to make a new level of גיהנם for you,
there's no room.
בנים doesn't apply to you.
That's what the הוה אמינא may be,
says the יצר הרע.
And therefore,
we needed to bring four פסוקים.
We're בנים.
וכי תימא סכלי הוא דמקרי בני,
maybe if we're foolish,
then okay,
then we can still be called בנים.
כי לית בהו הימנותא לא מקרו בני.
But if we're not faithful,
if we do עבודה זרה,
if we're not faithful,
then,
then we've lost it.
Then that's,
that's gone too far.
There is a line where you're not called בנים anymore.
תא שמע,
ואומר,
בנים לא אמון בם.
They're my children even if they're not faithful.
Wow!
Even if they're not faithful,
they're still called בנים.
Okay,
בסדר.
וכי תימא כי לית בהו הימנותא הוא דמיקרו בנים.
So if they're not faithful,
doesn't mean that they've abandoned Hashem.
They've been דבוק to עבודה זרה,
it means that here and there they did things that were inappropriate.
כי פלחו לעבודת כוכבים,
but if they've attached themselves,
they're serving idol worship,
then they're definitely gone!
They're no longer בנים!
תא שמע:
זרע מרעים בנים משחיתים.
Even if they're gone totally off track and they're ruined,
they're destroyed,
they're still called בנים.
Okay,
fine.
That sounds hard to believe,
like totally left Judaism,
they're serving עבודה זרה,
and they're still called בנים?
וכי תימא בנים משחיתים הוא דמיקרו,
okay,
so maybe they're בנים,
but they're called called defect sons.
They're called the black sheep son.
They're called the off the דרך son.
They're not,
they're called sons,
but they're sons like there's a פגם there.
בנים משחיתים,
that's what they're called.
בנים מעליא לא מיקרו,
but they're not called great sons.
תא שמע,
ואומר:
והיה במקום אשר יאמר להם לא עמי אתם,
in place of being called not my people,
יאמר להם בני קל חי.
They're called the sons of the living God.
No matter how far you go,
no matter how much you attached,
you can go back to being pure,
pure,
pure child.
Now,
you might say,
okay,
it's a גמרא,
it's אגדתא,
there's a מחלוקת,
who says like we hold like?
Maybe you're really intelligent and you've learned עירובין,
and you'll say,
well that doesn't prove anything,
Rabbi,
because we know that the מחלוקת between רבי מאיר and רבי יהודה,
the הלכה is like רבי יהודה.
Uh-huh,
uh-huh.
יצר הרע got the foot in the door.
יצר הרע has the best sources to quote,
like he always knows the right source,
you know,
he can always pull out the right source.
So,
שו״ת הרשב״א,
ראשונים,
it's not on Sefaria,
I had to print it up directly from the book.
Question that the שו״ת הרשב״א was asked:
A person leaves the path of תורה.
They become משומד לעבודה זרה.
So,
they left the path of תורה,
they become a priest.
They're wearing a little white dog tag over here,
who's that?
And it's not Purim.
They die.
Is it מטמא באוהל?
Is a כהן allowed to be in the room with that person?
Or are they no longer considered Jewish?
Because there are הלכות where they're not considered Jewish.
For example,
you're allowed to lend them ריבית,
which you can't lend a Jew ריבית,
but you can lend ריבית to a person who has left the path of
תורה.
Another example:
you don't have to return an אבידה.
So there are הלכות which are built into תורה דאורייתא.
דאורייתא,
ריבית is an איסור דאורייתא to a Jew.
It's permitted to a גוי.
Someone who's משומד לעבודה זרה,
you are allowed to lend them ריבית.
So they're not Jewish?
So the question the רשב״א was asked:
Are they also מטמא in Are they not מטמא באוהל?
Is a כהן allowed to go into an אוהל with them?
Because they're no longer considered Maybe there's no טומאה there.
That was the question he was asked.
And he answers:
תשובה:
איברא,
ישראל משומד מותר להלוותו בריבית.
It's true,
you're right.
You can lend them with ריבית,
and you don't have to return.
But that's a דין in אחוה,
אחיך.
So the תורה says the word אחיך.
So then he's not considered אחיך,
and therefore he's not under the category of being your אח.
And that's why you are allowed to lend him with ריבית,
etc.
אבל לגבי טומאה,
that's a different story entirely.
בכלל בנים הוא,
כדברי רבי מאיר.
He is considered Jewish.
He's still a child of Hashem.
Now,
this is someone who didn't do תשובה.
He didn't do תשובה!
He died as an עובד עבודה זרה,
and he's still called בנים!
So he's פסקנ-ing like רבי מאיר?
So this is the שו״ת הרשב״א פסקנ-ing like רבי מאיר in the גמרא קידושין,
דגרסינן בנים אתם לה׳
אלקיכם בזמן שאתם נוהגים מנהג,
he quotes the entire גמרא.
And then he says:
ואף על גב דרבי מאיר ורבי יהודה הלכה כרבי יהודה,
ah,
the רשב״א also knew that גמרא.
Even though we פסקן like רבי יהודה when there's a מחלוקת between the two,
footnote 16:
עירובין מ״ו עמוד ב׳,
הכא הלכה כרבי מאיר.
Here's different.
This is different,
the הלכה is like רבי מאיר.
Why?
קראי קא דייק,
because he brought four פסוקים to prove his point.
So הלכה is like רבי יהודה against רבי מאיר if they're equal in the
גמרא.
But if רבי יהודה says an opinion and רבי מאיר brings four פסוקים to
back up his point,
and רבי יהודה doesn't argue on those,
then he's been proven the right view.
גמרא,
שו״ת הרשב״א:
בנים אתם,
no matter how far you go.
What I wasn't sure from the גמרא was,
maybe he's only saying you can still be a בן if you do תשובה.
What I learned from the רשב״א is that even if you haven't yet done
תשובה,
you're still called a בן.
Hashem still loves you.
That's a פלא עצום.
That means no matter how far you've gone and no matter how deep you've
gone,
no matter how distant you feel,
הקדוש ברוך הוא,
from His side,
He still considers you to be His child,
and He still loves you.
משל למה הדבר דומה.
Have you ever seen a שבת lamp?
You know the one where you swivel the top?
So,
you want to go to sleep and you can't sleep with the light on.
You need it to be dark,
but the light's on.
So you swivel the lamp,
and now pitch black in the room,
you can't see any light,
the ones that work well.
Pitch black in the room,
you can't see any light.
So now question:
Is there no light anymore,
or you just can't see the light?
No,
the light's still there.
I can prove it to you,
look,
swivel,
swivel,
it's still there.
The light's still there.
But you can't see it.
So why can't you see it?
Because you've swiveled and you've closed it.
But from the light,
is the light still there?
The light's Of course the light's still there.
הקדוש ברוך הוא's light is always shining.
His love for you is continuous,
it's eternal,
it's always shining.
Sometimes we swivel the שבת lamp,
and for us,
it looks dark.
We can't see the light that השם is shining.
But from השם's perspective,
it's still shining.
Sometimes we feel distant,
we feel that השם doesn't care,
we feel that השם doesn't love.
That's That's our experience,
because we're in a dark room.
But inside that lamp,
the light is still shining.
Without the reference directly to the שבת lamp,
that's what the מהר״ל writes in נצח ישראל,
פרק י״א:
אם ישראל סרו ופרשו מן אביהם,
if the Jews distance themselves and go off the path,
זהו מצד העלול עצמו,
אבל מה שהוא יתברך עילה להם,
הדבר הזה אינו סר כלל.
A Jew from his perspective can feel like he's distant,
but from the one who made him,
from השם empowering him,
he's not distant at all.
It's exactly the same,
כי אין הסרה שלהם רק מצד העלול עצמו.
The covering is only from the side of the receiver.
We are the ones swiveling the שבת lamp.
ולא מצד העילה,
ולכך בכל ענין נקראו בנים.
And that's why,
no matter how far we've gone—he's explaining the גמרא in קידושין—that doesn't matter how
far we've gone,
we're still called בנים,
because from השם's perspective,
He still loves us just as much,
even though we don't feel it,
because we've distanced ourselves.
Let's read one more piece of the of the מהר״ל,
and then I'm going to tell a very sad story:
כי שם בנים מצד אשר השם יתברך הוא עילה להם.
We are called children of השם because from His perspective,
He always loves us.
כמו האב שהוא עילה על הבן,
like a father who gives birth to a child,
מצד של האב,
דבר זה אין שינוי בכל חטא אשר יחטא.
It doesn't make a difference what you've done,
it doesn't change the relationship between you and your father.
תהיה החטא מה שהוא,
a person can sin all the sins in the world,
he's still the son of his father.
וכל חטא שהוא הסרה מהשם יתברך,
and therefore even if you feel distant from הקדוש ברוך הוא,
הוא רק מצד העלול,
that's only from your perspective.
אבל מצד התברך שמו,
דבר זה אינו מצד אמיתת עצמו.
That's a phenomenal understanding that the מהר״ל is bringing of our גמרא to explain
why we're always בנים,
that השם is still empowering us.
A very sad story that I wanted to share,
someone that I know distantly,
but I heard this story and it touched my heart very deeply,
was a husband and a wife,
and similar to a story we told yesterday in מוסר סדר,
but it's a different person,
the husband left the path of תורה.
And that was not good.
They had a good relationship,
they were raising children על דרך התורה,
and the husband had other ideas and met someone else younger,
and he decided to make a change for the bad,
and and he left the family.
And the mother,
who's a בת תורה raising her children על פי דרך התורה,
so then what's she supposed to say?
Like she she's doing the best she can.
She's trying to still remain loyal and faithful to her kids,
to תורה,
and the husband made a change.
So,
one of the children said to the mother when he heard what was happening,
he said,
"Is he divorcing you?"
That's a very very painful line.
Very painful line to say,
and the mother didn't do anything wrong,
she's just remaining loyal and faithful.
And now the child who's trying to figure it all out says to the
mother,
"Is he divorcing you?"
And the mother answered,
such a brilliant line,
I wanted to cry when I heard that line,
the genius of what she said.
She said,
"No,
he's divorcing himself."
אמת,
it was אמת.
He's divorcing himself.
We sometimes feel הקדוש ברוך הוא has abandoned us,
and we say,
"השם doesn't want me,
השם's distant from me,
I don't want Him,
if He's rejecting me,
I'm going to reject Him."
But the truth is that we just divorced ourselves.
We're the ones who closed the שבת lamp.
From השם's perspective,
there's endless,
ongoing love,
it's eternal love.
He's always waiting with His hands open and wanting to receive us back.
If we feel distant,
that's only our perspective,
but it it's a false perspective,
because from השם's perspective,
He still wants us.
We could be in the pits doing the worst thing,
and as we're doing it,
השם is saying,
"My child,
I'm here for you.
My child,
I love you.
My child,
come,
let's go together,
let's continue the path on the healthy way."
And when He says that,
you feel guilty,
you do feel guilty,
because I I'm doing all these terrible things and he still loves me?
Sometimes you want him to say,
"I'm rejecting you!"
and you say,
"Oh,
good."
And like,
"I deserve it."
Sometimes a person kind of wants that.
They want to be struck down because they want to feel like,
"Oh,
so he rejected me,
I'm rejecting him,
we're kind of equal."
But he never says that,
השם.
He never says that.
He's that endless loving,
for always loving father who says,
"I'm always here for you no matter what you do."
And that makes us feel guilty,
which is bad,
because you don't want to feel guilty,
you'd rather feel like not guilty and blame him.
It's easier,
you know?
You can justify yourself.
I'm okay,
I I'm okay being not okay,
so I'm upset with him.
I'm ברוגז with him,
he's ברוגז with me,
so we're going our separate ways.
But השם never allows that.
If you want to have a fight with two people,
they both have to be fighting,
but if one person is shouting and shouting and shouting,
and the other person remains calm,
it's not a fight.
It like,
it dies out very quickly.
If we're upset with ourselves and we're trying to blame it on השם,
but we know that השם constantly loves us and he's with us and he's
caring for us,
the fight doesn't last too long.
You say,
"Okay,
I feel bad about it.
I'm the one who's to blame here.
I'm the guilty one.
So,
I'm going to do תשובה."
Because it's not really part of who I am in my essence.
It's not really who I am.
So,
I'll do תשובה.
I'll apologize.
I'll move on and I can go back to that healthy,
loving relationship.
משל למה הדבר דומה,
well,
I just said,
there are two people fighting.
The one person thinks we're in a ברוגז,
we're in a fight,
we're not speaking.
The other person doesn't think that.
They just think,
"Okay,
something was said,
it was inappropriate.
Let's move on."
And this person comes to like,
"We have to talk.
We have to talk it through."
And that one says like,
"I'm totally fine.
Like,
as far as I'm I'm concerned,
like we're okay."
"Wait,
from your side,
we're okay?"
"Yeah,
we're okay."
"So,
there's no fighting here,
there's no ברוגז?"
"No,
there's not.
Everything is okay."
Okay.
So,
let's carry on.
Okay.
Suddenly he realized that actually,
it's okay.
Only one side thought there was an issue.
The other side never thought there was an issue.
He was okay.
הקדוש ברוך הוא never thinks there's an issue.
He wants you to do תשובה.
He wants you to come back,
but he's never holding a grudge against you.
It's a חידוש.
I thought רש״י in ישעיה says that we need to do תשובה?
We do need to do תשובה.
We're never arguing on that.
We always need to do תשובה.
Although I'm going to bring a רבינו יונה in a minute who's going to
argue on that.
But we we do need to do תשובה.
That's why I said it's healthy to feel guilt.
It's healthy to feel guilt.
Guilt is a healthy feeling where you say,
"It's not me in my essence.
It's something external to me which is not fitting to me,
and I have to therefore get rid of it.
It's clothing that doesn't fit.
I have to take it off."
But you never associate it with yourself:
"I'm gone.
I'm ruined.
I'm shameful."
That you never say.
But the גמרא says like כאילו שכל,
כל המתבייש מוחלין לו על כל עוונותיו.
יש גמרא כזאת כמדומני,
אז כאילו אז זה הצד של guilt,
ולא הצד של אשמה.
Recognize the difference.
Recognize the difference between the two.
If a person feels embarrassed and it's a healthy embarrassment,
that means that he's saying,
"I'm not associating this with myself."
Then הקדוש ברוך הוא will forgive him for all his sins,
because השם,
from his side,
was always on your side.
You had the מחיצה,
you put the מחיצה,
so you get rid of it.
How do you get rid of it?
You feel guilty and you feel ashamed.
Not ashamed in the negative sense,
but in the healthy sense where you say,
"I don't want this to be part of you.
This external thing is in my way.
It's a מחיצה."
What does a מחיצה mean?
It means I'm here,
השם's there,
and there's something in the middle.
It's not me,
it's something else in the middle.
Okay,
I'm going to remove the מחיצה.
By feeling guilty,
I'm going to say,
"I don't want this here.
It's in my way.
Let's move" I'm not suggesting removing מחיצות in all situations,
just in the case of The רמב״ם in הלכות תשובה says in פרק ז׳
that before you do תשובה,
then you're שנוא לפני המקום,
and משוקץ,
מרוחק,
ותועבה.
Once you do תשובה,
then you're back.
So does that work with what you're saying here?
The way I understand what he's saying there is that's still from what your
perspective.
Meaning,
until you've done תשובה,
then you feel משוקץ,
you feel distant,
you feel out of the game.
But you should know,
says the רמב״ם,
that in a moment you can change that.
You could do it's up to you,
it's not up to השם.
If it would be up to השם כביכול that there's more action needs to
be taken not dependent on you,
then what are you supposed to do?
It's not just dependent on me.
Well,
the רמב״ם coming there is to say that in a split second you can
change it,
because from his side there's always love.
You're משוקץ,
meaning you're feeling distant,
you've divorced yourself,
you've pushed yourself away,
you've put the מחיצה there.
In a second you can change that because it only depends on your perspective.
Recognize that it's not you in your essence.
Recognize that it's you in what you've done,
external things that are bad.
Put them aside and move on.
The next source that I wanted to quote is רבינו יונה.
אשכנזים say this רבינו יונה,
and it's printed in the מחזור on ערב ראש השנה.
ערב יום כיפור has more מזל.
ערב יום כיפור,
there's תפילת זכה,
that like,
lots of people say that.
That's in the beginning of the מחזור of ראש השנה,
of יום כיפור.
ערב ראש השנה,
there's also something to say before ראש השנה comes in.
Has less מזל.
Oh well,
people don't say it as much,
but it's worth saying,
have a look.
In the prayer,
or the,
yeah,
the prayer to say on ערב ראש השנה printed in the אשכנזי מחזורים is
what's called יסוד התשובה of רבינו יונה.
So there's,
you know,
he wrote entire ספרים,
and he wrote short pieces.
This is a very very short piece,
it's one essay.
And he tells you how to do תשובה.
And it's an amazing piece.
It's quite shocking when you read it for the first time.
Well,
when I thought about it for the first time,
I read it many times,
but when I thought about it for the first time,
I suddenly realized that this is revolutionary!
Revolutionary in in its way of thinking.
Let me just first address the issue of what he's speaking about first and
then read it inside.
רבינו יונה is well aware that people are stuck in רבי יהודה's mindset that
I'm rejected by Hashem,
I've done sins,
they've become part of my essence,
that's who I am.
Hashem probably doesn't love me anymore,
and how can I come back to Hashem in the state that I'm in?
I've gone so far.
And the heavy burden and weight of having done the sins gets in the
way of doing תשובה because a person feels ashamed and not wanted.
So רבינו יונה,
he has a radical suggestion,
radical.
He says:
pretend you never sinned.
You never did anything wrong.
You say,
"Yeah,
but it's not pretend.
This is ערב ראש השנה.
This is the last thing you say before ראש השנה,
after מנחה,
before מעריב.
This is what you're saying there.
You can't like make up games,
you know?
What do you mean pretend?
There's no pretend!"
As if you never did anything wrong,
make believe that you're a גר starting from scratch,
today is your first day,
and make a plan.
And he says,
"Really?
Like you can't do that.
You have to be authentic,
and isn't isn't this the עשרת ימי תשובה where you have to repent on
what you did?"
"Yes,
but let me tell you how to do it.
It's not going to work if you're stuck in the mud.
If you're starting at minus a thousand,
and you're feeling negative about yourself,
you won't be able to do תשובה because your self-esteem will be so low,
and you'll feel so bad about yourself,
that you won't be able to think logically,
productively about how to move forward.
So for a moment,
imagine as if you didn't do anything wrong in your whole life,
and you're a גר צדק,
and you're starting from scratch.
What would you do?
Make a plan.
Envision your life."
Say,
"Okay,
in a theoretical world,
if I never did anything wrong,
I didn't have a negative self,
then I would learn,
and I would do מצוות,
and I would overcome things,
and everything would be good."
Okay,
fine,
make that your plan.
Make that your vision.
"Okay,
that sounds pretty good."
Take that upon yourself.
That's what you're going to be.
"I would love to.
Sounds great,
idealistic.
Sounds fantastic.
Ideal world."
Okay,
that's your קבלה.
"Yes,
that's who I am.
But wait,
I did sins."
Okay,
do תשובה for them.
"But you told me to forget about them!"
No,
now remember them.
"Well,
why now?
I was in such a beautiful world where I never did anything wrong.
Now you're telling me to bring it back in?"
No,
you needed to put it on the side for a minute,
because as long as you had such negative imagery of who you are,
it was holding you back from having a clear vision of how to be
an עבד ה׳.
So here's the revolutionary idea of רבינו יונה.
He says that you temporarily pretend you never did anything wrong in order to
create a vision of how you're going to be good.
Then you set yourself on the path of being good,
and when you're in a good חזקה,
and you're on a good path,
and you're strong,
then it's not going to set you off kilter.
It's not going to send you back down to גיהנום again.
Then you can look at the bad that you did,
and you can say,
"What went wrong?
Why did it happen?
I can't believe I did that."
And then you can do תשובה for it.
Let's read it inside.
שלח לנו הקדוש ברוך הוא ביד עבדיו הנביאים,
יחזקאל הנביא,
נאום ה׳
אלוקים,
שובו והשיבו מכל פשעיכם.
So you hear the double language?
שובו,
so do תשובה,
והשיבו מכל פשעיכם,
and then do תשובה for all the sins.
What was the double שובו?
Why did it say שובו,
do תשובה,
and then,
and do תשובה from all your sins?
What was the first תשובה if it wasn't from your sins?
Why the double language?
השליכו מעליכם את כל פשעיכם אשר פשעתם בם.
You want to do תשובה?
Listen to me very clearly what you need to do:
throw away all of your sins that you did as if you never did
them,
ועשו לכם לב חדש ורוח חדשה למה תמותו.
Make believe that you have a new heart,
a fresh heart,
a new spirit.
Why should you die?
אדם אשר פשע וחטא ובא לחסות תחת כנפי השכינה,
you've got a lot of sins behind you and you want to come close
to Hashem,
ולהכנס בדרכי התשובה אשכילך,
let me enlighten you,
ואורך בדרך זו תלך.
ביום ההוא ישליך כל פשעיו אשר עשה,
throw away all of your sins,
pretend you never did them.
יעשה עצמו כאילו בו ביום נולד,
make believe today is that your birthday,
the first day that you were ever born.
ואין בידו לא זכות ולא חובה,
no good,
no bad,
fresh start.
וזה היום תחילת מעשיו.
Today you're beginning.
היום יפלס אורחותיו,
שלא יטו מעגלותיו מדרך הטוב.
You're not going to go away from the straight path,
the good path.
וזו ד- ודרך זו תביאהו לשוב בתשובה שלימה.
If you do this,
then you can continue to a full תשובה.
כי הוא יעשה עצמו כמשליך מעליו כובד עונות,
cuz you're rejecting you're throwing away from yourself the heaviness,
the weight,
the burden of all the sins,
ועוצם החטאים אשר עשה.
Don't be bogged down by your thoughts.
Don't let it bother you that you're too embarrassed to do תשובה from all
of your sins.
Don't think,
"How could I be so brazen?
And I've done all these sins,
and I've done them again and again and again,
and they're uncountable how much I've done.
I feel like it's too embarrassed to come back to Hashem."
Don't think that.
כי המסית יושב כזבוב במפתחי הלב.
It's like a יצר הרע,
a זבוב,
a fly,
who's coming exactly on your soft point,
your sensitive point,
your heart.
מתחדש עליו בכל יום.
He's renewing with new claims everyday against you to harm you.
רק יחשוב כי כן מדת הבורא יתברך.
You should know exactly what Hashem's way is.
ידו פשוטה לקבל שבים.
Hashem's putting out a hand,
reaching out a hand to help you and bring you back.
ולכן טוב לו להשליך פשעיו,
and therefore it's good to reject them and throw them away,
לעשות לו לב חדש,
start afresh.
וכה יעשה ביום טהרתו,
and that's what you should do when you want to become טהור.
And this this idea here,
he didn't write it for ערב ראש השנה.
He wrote it for someone who wants to become a בעל תשובה.
It's not the kind of thing you can read everyday.
It's the kind of thing which you have to say,
"I'm having my life until here,
and then from here is different."
This That's why we read it only once a year on ערב ראש השנה.
It's when you want to reset.
איפוס מחדש.
You want to say,
"I know what I did until now got me in a bad rut,
and it's just continuing.
It just keeps going.
I have to break the rut!
I have to stop this mindless sin that I'm doing!
I have to stop the mentality that I'm the one who's bad,
which is causing a cycle of I did something bad,
I feel guilty about it,
I need a way to relieve myself,
resolve the bad that I've done,
I need to turn to something,
really the real answer is doing תשובה,
but I feel too guilty to do that,
so I need something to calm myself down and feel good about myself,
I'll sin again!
Because it gives me some level of pleasure."
And the cycle continues,
and he goes down and down and spirals out of control.
Says the רבנו יונה,
if that's happening to you,
and you need to stop it,
this is the advice that I say:
Pretend you never did anything wrong.
Don't have that sense of guilt that you need to fix and you need
to Just start again.
Just say,
"Whatever happened happened.
היה מה שהיה."
Doesn't make a difference.
It doesn't make a difference.
What makes a difference is how I'm going to improve.
How am I going to improve?
I'm starting from scratch.
How would I like my ideal life to look like?
And I'm starting from now,
on that path.
"Ah,
but I've done sins."
Okay,
later on when I'm in a more stable place,
I'm not in a rut of negativity,
then I'll reassess.
And at this point,
I want to say another עצה טובה,
which many times has knocked people out of the path,
and with the clarity on this point I think it can be helpful.
There are many statements of חז״ל and of later sources that were designed to
help people follow the path of תורה.
Now different phrases work for different people,
different eras different messages need to be said,
and like we're going to speak about in the next month or so in
חובות הלבבות,
depending on where you are on the spectrum,
you need to hear a different message.
So there are some people who are taking עבירות too lightly,
and they don't think that עבירות are so bad,
and the words that חז״ל would say to those types of people or the
words the ראשונים would say to those types of people are,
"Take it seriously!
If you don't take it seriously,
bad things are going to happen!
This is the type of sin you can't do תשובה from!
Don't do it!"
And they say harsh things.
Now there are some people that's the exact message they need to hear.
It's perfect for them.
It's unbelievable.
It puts them right back on track,
because they were off the spectrum on this way,
and then that statement hits them back into being in the middle path where
they need to be.
But there are some people who they're on this side of the spectrum,
and they say,
"I've done sins that I can never do תשובה for.
I'm a חסיד of רבי יהודה,
I learned the גמרא in עירובין,
הלכה is like רבי יהודה,
I never learned the שו״ת הרשב״א."
See what happens if you don't learn ראשונים?
You can make terrible mistakes.
And then they suddenly read a statement of חז״ל or a ראשון that says,
"You can't do תשובה for this!
You've gone too far,
this is the worst sin!"
And that same statement which is supposed to push someone from here to the
middle,
it's pushing them from being anyway off-track even further!
And it ruins them,
it destroys them.
So It's not true.
What do you mean it's not true?
It's חז״ל!
What do you mean it's not true?
It's the ראשונים!
You can't say it's not true!
Okay,
so it's not true for you.
Ah,
rabbi,
what happened to you?
Pluralistic?
I never knew.
Yeah,
everyone has their own truth?
Multiple truths?
Whatever feels right for you,
that's what you need to do?
That's what you're saying,
רב?
No,
no,
no.
Clear חילוק.
Let's make a very,
very clear חילוק.
When it comes to הלכה,
there's only one truth.
שולחן ערוך is שולחן ערוך.
The רמ״א is also the רמ״א,
בסדר,
okay.
There's a מחלוקת,
שולחן ערוך,
רמ״א,
בסדר.
But if you're Ashkenazi,
it's the רמ״א.
And your שולחן ערוך is the שולחן ערוך,
בסדר.
But there's clear הלכה,
clear,
ah,
שעת הדחק,
okay.
There are exceptions,
but it's all within the הלכה.
All within the הלכה.
It's not what feels right to me in the הלכה.
No,
הלכה is הלכה.
But when it comes to מוסר,
when it comes to עבודת השם,
when it comes to messages to be taken,
then that's not true.
There's not one right statement.
Different statements of חז״ל say contradictory things,
aimed at different people in different situations.
And the goal of חז״ל is always,
always,
always to set you on the right track and bring you close to השם.
There's a litmus test that only you can know.
If you read a statement of חז״ל which is a מוסר,
עבודת השם type of statement,
and you read that,
and it makes you feel that you're more dedicated to השם,
more in line,
it gives you more motivation,
then it was aimed for you and it was the right thing.
Read it again,
daily.
It's going to be helpful for you.
But if you read a statement of חז״ל,
and it makes you feel demotivated,
it sets you off-track,
if that's what חז״ל are saying,
I don't know if I can keep it up,
it makes me feel worse about my עבודת השם,
it wasn't designed for you.
It's the wrong message for you right now.
It's true,
but it's not true for you right now.
How do you know?
You know.
You can tell.
There's a litmus test:
Is it bringing you closer or pushing you further away?
So it's not true?
It is true!
It's true for that person,
it's true for that person.
It's true for you at a different time of your life.
It's true for עם ישראל in a different era.
It's true.
But is it working for you,
or is it pushing you away?
משל למה הדבר דומה.
I don't know if you've ever heard of this concept,
but there's a thing going around.
There's the light,
happy,
dancing,
fun approach to עבודת השם,
and there's the halachic,
serious,
עבד approach to השם.
It's a it's something which it's going around,
you know people are talking about it,
dancing to it.
And which approach is right?
So someone came to me recently in the ישיבה,
and they said to me,
"Something happened.
I need to talk."
"What happened?"
They said there was a rabbi who was giving a שיעור against that approach,
or that path within Judaism.
And he said about you have to be an עבד השם,
and it's about the yoke,
and it's about being halachic,
and it's about being intense,
and and he said those types of words.
And and it made me feel like,
oh my gosh,
like Judaism is not pleasurable and it's not fun and it's like and and
and it totally turned me off,
and I feel like,
oh,
it's heavy,
and like I'm not saying I want to be like dancing all day and
just like having fun and like not learning גמרא,
but but but but like,
whoa,
that's like if that's the other option,
then I don't know what's better.
Like I think I'll be more emotionally more stable over there.
That's intense.
What do you do?
So I said,
you know,
this debate that's happening right now in Jewish culture,
it's not a new debate.
It goes back a few hundred years.
The בעל שם טוב was the first Thank You השם,
and he was dancing,
and he was singing,
and he was saying,
"If you don't wake up on time for שחרית,
but you're going to daven with more כוונה later on,
you do what you need to do."
Ah,
it's a כיף!
And the וילנא גאון,
he was adamantly against the approach of חסידות.
He wouldn't meet the בעל התניא.
The בעל התניא came to the meet the וילנא גאון,
and he refused to let him in the room!
He refused to meet him.
He was so against!
And he said that חסידות is taking people away from Judaism,
and it's not a branch of Judaism,
and anyone who follows it is harsh things.
Whoa.
Whoa.
A generation later,
חסידות was doing fine.
People were inspired in עבודת השם,
and keeping הלכה,
against what the וילנא גאון predicted.
And one of the חסידים came to the תלמיד of the וילנא גאון,
רב חיים וואלוז'ינר,
and said to him,
"Your רבי was wrong!
He made a mistake.
He said that חסידות was bad,
it was going to take people off the path of תורה,
but you see it's not true."
You see they are on the path.
And רב חיים וולוז'ינר answered,
"You know why חסידות didn't derail and go totally off track?
Because the וילנא גאון said extreme statements:
'They're going to go off the דרך.
We have to have only learning,
learning,
learning,
learning,
learning,
and no fun.'
חסידות was scared.
They said,
'Oh my gosh,
we're in threat.
They're accusing us.'
And they realigned themselves to make sure they were on track with mainstream Judaism.
So,
it's not that the וילנא גאון was wrong.
The וילנא גאון saved חסידות,
or saved the Jews who were following חסידות."
So,
I said to this boy,
so I said,
"Let me ask you:
who's right?
חסידות who are saying go all the way that way,
in that generation?
Or the וילנא גאון who was saying go all the way that way,
in that generation?"
Neither of them were right.
They were both trying to make you well-balanced and central.
חסידות saw that people were too far this way and not experiencing and enjoying
their Judaism,
so they came to bring move this way.
The וילנא גאון said,
"Whoa,
you've gone too far!
Don't go too far in that way!"
So,
he came to bring us back.
But they both wanted mainstream Judaism.
They both wanted people to be grounded in הלכה and to be enthusiastic about
their יידישקייט.
They both wanted both.
They were arguing about where exactly it is to be,
and they both said extreme statements in order to make sure that you would
end up on a healthy path.
And therefore,
my message is when you read words of חז"ל,
please,
please know that what חז"ל intended was that you would be more connected to
השם.
When you read words of ראשונים,
please know that what חז"ל intended—they were also rabbis,
חז"ל and חכמים,
right?—what חז"ל intended was that you'd be closer to השם.
They would never have written any statement if they thought that your interpretation of
it would take you further away from השם.
So,
don't misread what they're saying.
So,
when it comes to הלכה,
it's very clear:
you have to do what it says.
When it comes to מוסר,
עבודת השם statements,
you have to identify,
"Is this bringing me closer or is it taking me further away?"
If it brings you closer,
it's good,
read it again and again.
But if it's taking you further away,
then you should know that's not what the intention of the author was.
They didn't intend to have that effect on you.
You're reading it wrong or it doesn't apply to you in some way.
So,
let's summarize what we've said.
There are people who feel totally alone.
They feel worthless.
They feel rejected.
They feel without hope.
And that's all a misconception.
Whatever feeling you have that you're far from השם,
it's false.
It's not true from השם's perspective.
It's an image that you have right now not based on תורה sources.
The תורה's view is,
no matter how far you've gone,
השם is always there with open hands receiving you back,
like רבי מאיר said in the גמרא,
and like the מהר"ל explained,
and like was פסק'נט in the שיטה דרשב"א.
No matter how far you've gone,
השם's love for us is unconditional,
and it's irrespective of how we behave.
So,
that means I should be fine with everything I do?
No.
Guilt is healthy.
Guilt is healthy,
that's what we read in the ספורנו last week,
because it helps you take action.
It helps you say the negative that I've done is external to me and
I'm dissociating myself from it,
and therefore that guilty feeling helps you to say,
"I don't want to be doing bad things,
I'm removing and distancing myself from the bad things."
But you never mistake that with your identity.
You always know that your identity is loved by השם.
Sometimes תשובה feels too much,
overwhelming,
too far,
and that's only because we kind of want to reject השם.
But when we know that השם doesn't want to reject us,
then it's not too overwhelming.
We realize that הקדוש ברוך הוא loves us.
Don't associate the shame with yourself.
I want to finish off with one משל.
Two more statements and then one משל.
Statement number one:
I said it already,
I just want to repeat it in a חזרה.
It's the same השם who said that it's אסור is the same השם who
said there's מחילה.
And if you believe that you did something wrong because השם said that it's
wrong,
then it's unjust for you to say,
"השם won't accept me back."
It's unfair.
Don't say it in God's name.
הקדוש ברוך הוא said you can return.
It's not true to say that you can't come back.
It causes unnecessary pain.
And the second statement that I wanted to say was:
there's a difference between good and bad.
Good you will get eternal reward for.
The שכר of the good that a person does lasts forever,
in the קרבת השם that you'll have in the next world.
Bad is temporary.
Even if a person died without without doing sin,
תשובה.
If a person did sins without doing תשובה,
and he died,
then there'll be a year where he may have to go through hardships,
but then it finishes.
So,
if you're trying to weigh up "I've done good and I've done bad," it's
not a fair equation.
It is totally not fair,
because the good that you've done is eternal and lasts forever.
The reward for it eventually will be for eternity.
The bad that you've done,
the effects of it are temporary.
The punishment is limited.
So,
when you're weighing up "Where am I holding?"
and you're saying "I'm good and I'm bad," it's not a fair equation.
Your good is worth eternity,
and your bad is very brief.
It's going to maximum ideally you'll do תשובה in this world,
but maximum it will last a year,
and then you're finished.
And therefore when you're coming to judge yourself,
or weigh up yourself,
should know that it's not a fair equation.
The side of good is always stronger even if it's minimal.
And the final story that I wanted to tell,
which is a true story that happened to me when I was a kid,
and if I told it before then,
as I always say,
it's worth hearing again,
is I was I was six years old,
and I was in year one in Hasmonean Primary School in Shirehall Lane,
and we were doing art,
and the teacher said to us,
"Be very careful with the Tipp-Ex,
the white-out,
because it doesn't come off,
and when you if you put it if it comes on your skin,
then then it doesn't come off."
Okay.
So,
I was busy writing something,
and I made a mistake,
so I got the white-out,
the Tipp-Ex,
and I and I did it and and it went on my finger.
So,
like,
"Oh no!
It's never going to come off!
It's going to be there at my בר מצוה!
It's going to be there at my wedding!
It's going to be there until the day that I die!"
And I remember being really,
really upset,
really upset.
And I not knowing what to do with myself.
The teacher came over to me,
said,
"Tzvi,
what's wrong?"
And I was crying,
I was six years old,
all right?
I was crying.
And and I said,
"Some of it came on my finger."
And she said,
"Okay."
So,
I said,
"Do you say it is never going to come off?"
And she said,
"It's not that it never comes off.
It It's not like the other markers where you can just like wipe it
off.
It will stay on there for a while,
like,
but like hopefully we can scrape it off,
but even if we can't,
like,
worst comes to worst,
worst comes to worst,
you know,
your fingernail will grow,
and it will grow with it.
But eventually it will come off,
like,
it's not going to last forever."
I said,
"You mean it's It's going to come off?"
So,
she said,
"Yeah,
it'll take a little longer,
but it'll come off."
And I was calmed.
And I remember that story from when I was six years old.
And it's ממש בנים אתם לה׳
אלקיכם.
There are sometimes when you associate the עבירה with yourself,
"It's part of me!
It's with me forever!
How can I ever fix it?
It's going to be with me for the rest of my life!"
Because you associate it with your essence.
But then comes the voice of your six-year-old kindergarten teacher,
your first grade teacher,
and she says to you,
"My child,
don't worry.
It's a little harder to get off,
but it's not part of your essence.
It's still external to you.
You don't have to worry.
You've been redeemed.
Hashem loves you.
Your essence is pure,
your essence is good."
And if you know deep down the truth of what חז״ל say,
that your essence is always good,
then the תשובה is so much easier.
You don't have to cry,
you don't have to be depressed,
you don't have to get into the cycle which spirals down into גיהנם,
but you can say,
"Okay,
I made a mistake,
but it's not me.
It's not my essence.
I made a mistake,
but even Tipp-Ex can come off.
Even the עבירות can be removed,
and I can return to Hashem."
שכוייח.
That was part six of the שובבים.
There's two more parts to the שובבים.
בעזרת השם,
next week,
or next opportunity,
will be הלכה למעשה.
We've spoken about a lot of מוסר principles,
and practical skills and guidelines and perspectives,
and we practical הלכה too.
So בעזרת השם,
next week is going to be a הלכתי שיעור on all the topics of
man and woman,
הוצאת זרע לבטלה,
all those topics,
that'll be the next topic.
And then there'll be one more which is about more of a vision for
the future,
taking the principle of this תאוה to a much higher place,
why הקדוש ברוך הוא gave it to us,
what its purpose is,
and what we're supposed to do with it.
That's the next two parts.
Taking a three-minute break,