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Alison Geskin talks with some of the most successful leaders from around the globe. She discovers what they're doing, why they're doing it, and what impact they've made.
00:02 - Speaker 1
Welcome to Live, learn, lead with me, alison Geskin. Leadership isn't just about titles. It's about action, impact and the courage to navigate the messy middle. In this podcast, we'll explore real stories behind leadership the wins, the struggles and the lessons that shape us. Whether you're leading a team, a business or your own growth, each episode will challenge you to think differently, lead with intention and show up as the leader you're meant to be. Let's dive in. Lynn, I am so excited for our conversation today. Oh my gosh, I have been such a big fan of yours for such a long time I maybe have been a secret stalker because I think you're amazing, so thank you so much for saying yes to me. Oh, thank you. Let me ask you this, darling when someone asks you what you do, how do you describe yourself?
01:01 - Speaker 2
Oh my gosh. Well, I've always had a thing for not pigeonholing myself into wedding planner or party planner, so when people ask me what I do, I tell them I produce events. I've always trained myself in the wedding world, but in the non-wedding world too, and when I go to conferences I often go to lighting and technology and catering and cross train like that. So it's not just about the checklist and the pretty pen, it's about the production. It's about the staging of things, the timing of things, the flow of things. It's a lot more than just a wedding planner. But it is indeed also says on our Instagram page that we serve love for a living.
01:44 - Speaker 1
It is indeed Also says on our Instagram page that we serve love for a living. I love it. You serve love for a living. Yes, I love it. I love it. I love it, I love it. I want to unpack that. Take us back to the beginning. What pulled you into this magical, emotional, high stakes world of weddings and events? What drew you into it in the first place? And then, how did you stay?
02:07 - Speaker 2
How did I stay here? I always say that it found me. I didn't find it. A series of crazy events sort of happened. I was always a romantic. Of course I was born that way. I was also born very bossy, shocker. Anybody that knows me will know that that I love making things happen. So I was the captain of the safety patrols in grade five. I've always been that person that say pick me, pick me. I can do this. I can cheer everybody on, I can make everybody come to the table and have a great time. I've just been bred that way and I thank my mother for that because she's amazing. I was in a marching band. I was a drum major in a marching band. I was in every musical group you can imagine. I was in choir in university.
02:52
I went to become a teacher, went to university for that. I loved the world of special needs kids so it was like all about fixing and making and empowering people to be their best. So when I was a teacher I ended up doing more events for the school than I did actually teaching. So it kind of overcame me.
03:11
And then I started doing the grad and the retirement parties and all of that and I thought, damn, I'm kind of good at this, huh, maybe I should have a side hustle for a while. So a bunch of my girlfriends were getting married and I'm like, can I learn with you? And, of course, dove into the overachiever world and just researched everything I could, and back in the day it was books, reading books and scanning things and making binders. I just prepared myself for that and I thought, if I'm going to do this, I'm going to learn everything I can. And then I said goodbye to teaching about a year later. Really, about my beautiful pension and security for the world of entrepreneurship, go me, oh you, every security entrepreneur that's listening is like oh, I got you sister.
03:56
You know what I mean when people jump off a cliff, and the definition of entrepreneurship is jumping off a cliff and figuring out how to build the plane on the way down.
04:04 - Speaker 1
Yes, do you have like a key defining moment where you realized that this was your calling? Certainly you played more in events as opposed to teaching, but was there a key defining moment that was like I'm going to pull the trigger, and how much courage did it take you to pull the trigger again, to lose stability, sustainability, attention?
04:22 - Speaker 2
Yeah, I'm going to be really honest and raw here. Alison, it was leaving my first husband. If I might say. My life was complete chaos. I was living in Vancouver at the time. I was doing lots of weddings, doing great at school, was busy all the time, did a lot, but it just that that world was not for me personally and I needed to really get out. And it took me a lot of guts and a lot of courage and training and support from my friends to be able to make that change. So put the key under the door, drove over the Coquihalla, came over to Alberta, moved home to be with my family again, and it was a clean start. I had nothing to my name, dead free. The world was my oyster. I had done a lot of work on myself and I entered into Alberta saying I am going to take this bull by the horns and I'm not stopping. So watch me, here I go. And that was it. I just jumped in. I didn't know a thing, I didn't know where I was going to land, but I did.
05:22
I mean now. So it's just a pure lesson in tenacity, and sometimes out of a big crisis and your lowest low comes your highest high eventually, and I just believe so much in the world gives you what you need when you need it.
05:36 - Speaker 1
My mom, who's no longer with me anymore, left me with this. She said no matter who you believe in, god, allah Sheba the stars. Whatever she said, god gave you gifts every single day. You just had to be aware of them, and sometimes those gifts were hard gifts, that's right. Some of them were beautiful, but at the end of the day, they're all beautiful because of the lesson in it.
05:55 - Speaker 2
The world gives you what you need, not what you want.
05:58 - Speaker 1
Oh yeah, Sometimes that's hard for us to see, especially when the world's giving us what we don't think we need.
06:05 - Speaker 2
Sometimes it's a lot of shit.
06:08 - Speaker 1
And I'm going to lie, I can only be tested so much. But yeah, dig deeper. How did you start Lynn Fletcher Weddings? What was your initial vision so like? After you moved from BC to Alberta? You had a carte blanche in terms of what you could do. How did it start?
06:25 - Speaker 2
You're digging, alberta. You had a carte blanche in terms of what you could do. How did it start? You're digging, girl. You're coming up with the good stories.
06:34
So I moved home my mom. I knew a lot of people in the event industry she was in the oil patch at the time so she researched a great place for me to land. I ended up working with a brilliant, brilliant designer, a lady that owned an event company. I learned a lot from her Did great, won awards, did 55 weddings a year by myself, had an assistant live in the life, went to every conference. I taught at Mount Royal in the event management department. She really elevated me. I would have never gotten there by myself, so I have to really give her kudos for that. She's now retired, but I thank her every day for the ground that she gave me.
07:08
So ended up having a baby, wanting a little change, going to a different company, more of a corporate side, and it just didn't work. I had weddings. I started a social division for them, I was helping with corporate events and sometimes it's a person thing, it's not a job thing. I had a BlackBerry back then and a parking spot and a Mac laptop and all the things, but I didn't have that soul light that I needed. So I think my boss felt it at that time and we sort of said bye-bye, I didn't believe it was going to happen that fast. Really, be careful what you wish for right. So I'm known for pink and I'm known for rhinestones, and my exit from that company is where that story started. So he said to me you know, lynn, you're like Linus of Charlie Brown, except it's not dirt, it's glitter.
08:05 - Speaker 1
And for anybody that's ever met Lynn oh my God, that is the best way to describe her.
08:11 - Speaker 2
The pink tornado. I'd like to call you a pink starburst. Oh, starburst, I like that better Supernova. Anyway, I'm a lot and I'm proud of it, it's okay. And he said you blow in and you blow out and you leave glitter on everything and then you're just gone. You're all over the place. I cried. I thought, oh, you're so mean, you're so rude, that's so not nice. And so I left in tears and I went over to my mentor's office. She worked not too far from me. Kathy James, god love her. She started the wedding industry in Calgary and was the original OG of the trade shows, magazines, everything. So I went to her office, I collapsed on her floor and grabbed her dog and then sitting there on the floor crying and she goes what are you crying for? Why are you so upset? Get to the bank, get a bank account, put your name on it and start your own business. They're letting you leave with your clients. Lynn, take it and run.
09:12
So the first year I was never in debt because I was already going to make money. I didn't have to give it to the company that I was working for. I got to keep it all myself. And I'm like, wow, this is crazy. So what? Your weddings was born and my first logo was this giant L swirly thing. Cause I wanted to just give a little nod to the pink tornado, let me go Blessing in disguise. Yeah, I hired a marketing person at that point. Oh, that's a lot.
09:44
So I had to hire somebody and he interviewed me and he's like you know, no, you are pink for sure, glittery for sure, but you're rhinestones. You're not glitter, oh yeah, and you're not flaily and flowery and all this chaos. You have a good sense about. You have a have a good solid structure on your shoulders and good, solid design sense. The events in your weddings are absolutely gorgeous and meticulously designed. So the colors of your company are going to be gray and black, right, and then we're going to put a pink rhinestone on it somewhere.
10:22
I'm like, good, I'm going to put them on the business cards. He goes don't you dare? And I said, watch me. And then he submitted his business card design because at the time I was just going for it, right, like, my business cards were like $1.25 each at the time and they have these imprints and it was made of cotton and they had glossy this and that and embossed things. They were works of art anyway, put a rhinestone on it and he said I'm going to submit this for an award and see what happens. Well, he won. No, I love that. So to this day.
10:55
My business cards, although very much cheaper, still have pink rhinestones on them. I blew them on myself.
11:01 - Speaker 1
So that's how I got started. I love this, I love this, I love this. What was your original vision? So, like you're out on your own, you have your original vision and if you look back at everything that you've been through, everything you've done and you've done some incredible, incredible things oh my God, how has your initial vision? Has it changed at all? Is it still the same? What does it look like and feel like? It's?
11:29 - Speaker 2
changed a lot. Someone recently told me we got talking at wedding fair set up and he said you know, you used to be the biggest force in the whole world in this whole industry. People knew you were coming months before you were coming and you were so full of life and so full of energy and sharpness. But there was an edge to me. I wanted to take over the world. I wanted it all because I grew up an overachiever, you know. I did everything. I was the top of everything. I had to be the best at everything and push myself really hard. So that was sort of genetically. When I made my own business, I wanted it to be the best and the biggest and I wanted to be a leader in the industry. So I was teaching at Mount Royal already in the event management stuff.
12:18
I became a member of ILEA so the International Live Event Association. So I became a member of ILEA so the International Live Event Association. So I became a member and then quickly became a board member and then a chair. And then I was ILEA Canada 12 years of that. It was awesome. It was a great time. Went to every conference, bought a magazine halfway through in 2014. Crazy, like a bridal magazine. So I ended up with like two companies with three arms and five different groups of staff and I just went, went wild. I just wanted it all. I wanted to mentor everybody and I did all that.
12:48
I can't believe I did all that Do you still have the magazine? No, oh God, covid killed it. No, no, she's like no, no.
12:56 - Speaker 1
How long did you have the magazine for? What did you learn about yourself in that process?
13:01 - Speaker 2
I learned a lot. I learned a lot about publishing, a lot about design and space and balance and visual things that I use every day in my design proposals and stuff. So that was very cool. Learning from a graphic designer, that was brilliant, brilliant, brilliant. I'm a good speller because of all the proofing that we had to do.
13:21
I do hate photo shoots. I won't do them ever again because I did too many. They were really hard. Yes, because now they go the way you want it to and everybody's there for free and they're having fun and it's just not as tight as an event would be. So I just don't like that lack of control. I learned that about me.
13:37
But more than anything, I learned to think with my head and not my gut. Well, I do deal with my gut a lot and I hope we get to talk about that, but when you're going to something really big, look at all the avenues. Don't just go with your inner spirit, don't go with your gut, don't go with your ego, and this is another spot to take over the world. Do it smart and do it right, and in retrospect, I should have taken that process a little slower. I'm glad I did it. I learned so much. But there was something really great about letting it go too. It was that reason.
14:14
Season or a lifetime the magazine was only meant to be in my life for a season and teach me some good stuff and move on. So now I have the world and I love the world I live in. I will have the world I don't live in anymore. You know, I'm still present in all of those, but I'm a lot quieter than it used to be. I'm a lot more caring and soft and I listen more. I don't go watch me. I say what are you doing, what are you doing, how are you doing? Let's do me. I say what are you doing, what are you doing, how are you doing? Let's do this. I'm more interested in the people from the ground up than I am from the top down. If that makes sense, big shift in 25 years, for sure.
14:54 - Speaker 1
It totally makes sense. And, oh yeah, we're going to talk about gut and ego. You yes, you, just wait. I got one question for you just in terms of values, because I think that that's one thing that I really admire of you is that you really do have this beautiful ability, without saying any words, to really stand in integrity, and I think it's really important. So my question to you is what values still guide your business today? What are your anchors in sort of the values? What do you value?
15:22 - Speaker 2
Honesty, integrity. Although I'm not perfect Nobody is I've done some shitty things in my career, for sure. But just be honest, be real, own your shit. If you make a mistake, apologize. There's something so freeing about saying I'm so sorry, let's fix this. What's it going to take? Let me make it right, or holding people accountable? My staff, they all know anybody will tell you three things to happen when you make a mistake. You need to tell me be honest, own it and fix it.
15:55
Yes, don't come to me with a problem. I'm not fixing your problems, you fix it. So just the honesty and the respect you have to earn. Trust I learned that too. But respecting the people that are around you and acknowledging that they're great they're not exactly the way you want them to be, but you can't do that. I started my career thinking that I could mold these planners into mini-me's, but I know now that I need to embrace and blow up who they are, just like. Go give them the wings, do it and cheer them on.
16:26 - Speaker 1
I love that let's talk a little bit about and again, I call you a magic maker, but let's talk a little bit about the business of magic, really balancing sort of that emotion and execution, because your world is such a fascinating world that I don't know if everyone has, like, a true understanding of the behind the scenes. Yes, a lot of folks have a good understanding of how to run a business behind the scenes, but what about running a business behind the scenes where emotions run super high and, quite frankly, perfection is expected?
16:59 - Speaker 2
Oh yeah, that's the bottom. Yeah, that's the bare minimum. Yeah, you get really good's the bare minimum. Yeah, you get really good at what you know. Yeah, you're really good at your job so that you're confident and you can be present with your clients on the day. They're letting you into the most intimate corners of their world that not many people get to be in, and you're a stranger and they're paying you a lot of money.
17:21
So you're not exactly their friend because you're taking a lot of their money, but somehow they want you there. It's that security blanket, it's the insurance policy, and I've always taken that role really seriously. I enter into every wedding with just gratitude for the honor of being in those people's lives for that day. That's such a great anchor, it's a privilege. It's not something that I deserve or that I'm entitled to at all. I'm serving love for a living. I'm serving love for a living Serving you. I love it Serving them.
17:59
It's about them. It's not ever about me. I'm loving them. It's about them. It's not ever about me.
18:02 - Speaker 1
So, as you lead both like teams and families through one of the most emotional moments of their lives, how do you lead with the heart and execute with precision? How do you manage that? Let's unpack the team first. So leading team that supports people through sort of that emotional milestones it's a leading team that supports people through sort of that emotional milestones. How do you manage that? How do you help your team in that? Especially for the team members that are more new it's their first experience in dealing with heavy emotions, for sure, and listening is the biggest thing.
18:35 - Speaker 2
I always tell my team there's no bridezilla in the world, there's no groomzilla, there's no dadzilla, they're all zillas, because they need your help and they're like in chaos.
18:46
They're all zilla-ing when they come to you for help. They come to you for help. Help them. It's your job to help them get there and secure and reassure them. Just by talking. The tone of your voice gives them confidence and security. That's why we always do rehearsals the night before, because I want to look mom in the eye and tell her I got you. Our goals are exactly the same. I want to nail this wedding just as much as you want me to nail it, and you want the best wedding for your daughter that you could possibly imagine, and so do I. Or son, or son yes, we'll high five at the end of the day or the next morning or whatever, and I want to hear from at least five people that was the best wedding I've ever been to. It's about making those memories. Like they talk in corporate events about return on investment and getting your money and turning it around into more profits or whatever. You don't have that in weddings.
19:44 - Speaker 1
That's why you left the corporate world, because it wasn't heart led. Oh, it was like.
19:48 - Speaker 2
I couldn't do it, couldn't do it. I needed to hold somebody's hand. I'm like, mr President, you need your hand held. No, okay, okay, let me over here. It's very scary, but loving people and bringing them up and like you can do this, this is so amazing. I can't even just get excited for them and just check your ego at the door and live for these people and be a hundred percent invested in their happiness on the day. It's very rare that our clients go Zilla after they sign their contract, because we just said it right away. Here's what we do, here's how we work, this is how we communicate, this is what we're going to do for you. We know our shit. Our work speaks for itself. Let's go. It's this much. And they're like, yay, come with me.
20:37 - Speaker 1
But it's humility, it's just serve, serve, serve let's pull the string a little bit on that, because I'm super interested in this. I'd love to know some of the lessons that you learned all the pieces, and then we'll unpack each one. So I'd really like to know the lessons that you've learned about boundaries, about communication, about grace under pressure, about gut and ego. So much to unpack, but I want to unpack boundaries first. What have you learned about boundaries? It's so important.
21:08 - Speaker 2
There's personal boundaries and there's professional boundaries, so personal boundaries. I learned that when I got pregnant my boss wouldn't let me do teardown. Thank God I really fought back on her and she said you will realize that your body equilibrium, you will be more effective if you don't do tear down. You can't put your body through that. You know. Anybody that does night shift knows what that feels like. It's blurry, like you're in menopause when you're 25, it's just bad. Your mind goes on you.
21:38
I learned what it felt like because I'd always done the whole thing set up, do execution, production, tear down like I put in a 24-hour day Back in Vancouver. I used to do flowers too, and so the kids' dresses and the whole shebang. Oh my God, you are a magical unicorn. I did the invitations, a magical unicorn with sparkles. I loved all of it.
21:59
I sewed, I think, in patterns actually I'm going on a tangent, but I have the gift and I'm so grateful for it is seeing things being put together, whether that's people, a marching band show, a bridal gown, a Halloween costume. I can see the steps. It's kind of bad because I see the steps so clearly. I never give myself enough time to make those things happen. I just think it's going to happen. Then I'm like sewing a dress and I'm like on hour six and why is this taking me so long? It's really fast in my head.
22:29 - Speaker 1
Anyway, fantastic, I don't know where I was at, but oh, boundaries.
22:33 - Speaker 2
Okay. So learning to not do teardown my team still fights me on it to this day. But only 12 hour day, you're done. If you stay later, that's your problem, not my problem, because I'm trying to take care of you here. And if you want to put in 24 hours, you go right ahead. But you're not getting paid for it, it's okay, it's a control thing and that's fine, totally fair.
22:54
Mental health If somebody needs anything for themselves or they're sick and they come in and I'm like what are you doing? Get out of here, go home, get some rest. Jeez, louise, family members pass away. They're devastated with the loss of a family member. You know time to learn. I'll do whatever I can to support them. If they're going to do a wedding next week. You're not doing a wedding, I'm doing the wedding for you. I just swoop in and take care of it. I really love the concept of family here with my team and we really encourage each other. Personally, too, like that means a lot to me that I know what all of my team do. Personally, I know what matters to them, what makes them happy, struggles they're having at home. It just helps me understand them a lot better so that I can support them better and then, in turn, they support me.
23:44 - Speaker 1
Well, it's just helping navigate the environment.
23:47 - Speaker 2
I can vent at work. What A lot of times bosses can't. All they do is give, give, give, give, give, support, support, support, and they don't get anything back, anything for themselves. But with the right team and gaining that trust and earning that respect both ways it can be very fulfilling. Your team can really support you and cheer you on as a leader.
24:10 - Speaker 1
Well, it can make or break you and your team if not handled in the right way, right.
24:15 - Speaker 2
Personal boundaries. I discovered apps scheduling apps and I blocked time. No more Sundays. I don't meet anybody on Sundays. I have time limits for each type of meeting. Client planning meetings I do in the evenings because that's when they're all available, and Saturdays, from 10 to 1 kind of thing, because I like time with my family. So time blocking is really important. I will block personal time and I will take personal time and I'll work around it. I'll make up client work wherever I have to, but I try to put family first when there's something important. So there's that, and a lot of times I don't stay over. If we're working out of town, I'll just drive home. Okay, I will put a 12 hour day in. I will leave at nine o'clock PM and I'll have enough energy to drive home so that I can be really present and have a full day with my family on Sundays.
25:09 - Speaker 1
Sounds like you've got some really good systems in place. It probably is also much like all of us took you some lessons in which to learn some of those systems. Huge, oh yes.
25:19 - Speaker 2
I missed a lot of my daughter's childhood. I started my company when she was 15 months old, so I missed a lot. I missed little moments. You know I have a lot of moments, I have a lot of memories and of course, you know big stuff birthdays, christmas, all of that. I go crazy. But just the little things, the little. I need you, mom, I need to talk about something or whatever, but I have time now and I've had time for a good eight years. Now that she's a teenager, it's really important now.
25:47 - Speaker 1
Really important, in fact, even more so having two children be past teenagers almost. I think this is the most critical development time in their lives where you need to be present, like take all the vacations you want when they're babies, because they just sleep 10 hours a day. When they're budding adults whoa, you really need to walk alongside them.
26:11 - Speaker 2
And I'm learning a lot about this generation too. I'm listening to a book called the Anxious Generation about. My kid is part of the generation. It's the first generation of a phone-based childhood, not a play-based childhood. So executive function doesn't exist really in this generation generally. So right now in teenagehood the front of the brain is still being performed. The executive function the planning and things that they're going to need in adulthood is still developing. So I'm jumping in hard man, but there's no rule book. Need in adulthood is still developing. So I'm jumping in hard man, but there's no real book, there's no guidebooks, so we're just trying the best we can. Yeah, I love that?
26:49 - Speaker 1
What about lessons that you've learned around communication?
26:52 - Speaker 2
Don't hide anything, don't try and be perfect. Admit when you're failing, admit when you need help. Admit when you've made a mistake. That was COVID for sure. That was so hard. Of course, we all know what happened. You know the event business went down, but weddings, because of the emotional aspect of it, they were holding on for dear life and they were postponing, postponing, postponing. So I had to talk people off ledge like every second day to keep them. So I didn't have to give them refunds because I had no money at the time.
27:28 - Speaker 1
And we kept hearing it's just two weeks, it's just two weeks, it's just two weeks.
27:33 - Speaker 2
Oh, we'll be fine by November, Two years later. But thank goodness we live in Canada and not everybody likes that prime minister. But he threw money at us and so grateful I had a great banker. I was trying to be the Lynn Fletcher, I was trying to be there for everyone. I was going on podcasts and video calls for international things and mentoring and supporting and lots of event. People phoned me for advice and I'm like dude, I don't know I don't know what's happening.
28:04
I'm with you. It's never happened to me before, so I don't know what to do. I'm so sorry. I'm with you. And then I just had to quickly realize that I was not okay, that I was not the Lynn Fletcher that I wanted to be, and I was in pain and I was really stressed out and I was worrying about everybody in the world my staff and my family, mostly how I was going to provide for all those people, and it was very, very heavy. Then I got blessed with menopause, so that really didn't help much either. Oh, my God, I love it. Yeah, the wine is the.
28:43 - Speaker 1
That joy is up for you, woman.
28:49 - Speaker 2
I have a beautiful friend in the event world. Her name is Carrie Miller. She's a wonderful friend of mine, but she's one of the first people that called me to see if I was okay during COVID. And we're both in our pajamas drinking wine all day. That didn't help at all. Drinking wine all day that didn't help at all. There were very few people that I really leaned on Very few, and I made that as a big mistake. Looking back, I should have been more honest with my team. I should have been more honest with my family. I needed to tap out. I was not okay. I needed to get right again. My mental health was in the toilet. It was really bad. I couldn't get off my couch. Just the panic what was going to happen tomorrow, Because none of us knew. But how'd you get through that? I worked really hard. I worked really hard.
29:36
The second half of COVID. I discovered Clubhouse. That was amazing. That sort of came in and left in a night. But I made friends on Clubhouse that I didn't even know that lived in Australia and stuff. It was so neat because I could vent and I could share how I was feeling with these people in all of these chat rooms and there was no pressure to be the Lynn Fletcher of this community.
30:00
I was just me and I was vulnerable and I cried and got amazing support and advice from a lot of people around the world, A lot of business coaches and stuff that were on there Amazing. And I learned from them to just start loving yourself. That's where you have to start. You know, they say in the airplane, when the airplane's going down, you put the mask on yourself first before you put your mask on your kids or anyone else for that matter. So I put my mask on myself and I really tried hard to be kind to myself, forgive myself and just reinvent who I was and just be kinder to myself first, and then that would spread to other people. My staff tell me that I'm very different post COVID and they love who I am. I mean, they loved me before just because I was a badass, but now I'm like I care and it's obvious and they believe it and I'm softer. I think it'd take it'm softer, I think It'd take it a little bit more easy. Yeah.
31:04 - Speaker 1
How hard was it for you during that period to be kind to yourself? Impossible.
31:14 - Speaker 2
When you're an overachiever and you've achieved so much in your life and you're so known for being that and you're not, and it's embarrassing, it's humiliating. I was ashamed that I was not okay Kind of reminded me when I had my kid. I had postpartum depression, really bad for a whole year, and it felt the same way, that I was not okay and I didn't know how to fix it. My dad said something wonderful to me, and this applies for COVID, applies for business. I was just bawling after my daughter was born and I said I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know what I'm doing. He goes you know, lynn, you're so used to performing magic at these weddings you do and in your business that you do so well, it's time you learn how to create magic at home and define what that looks like. Wow, I still get choked up thinking about that. What a matter of memory. When he talks, it's important and I've lived with that since. Wow no-transcript From my drop and my crisis in COVID, personally and mentally, and physically too.
32:15
I gained 80 pounds. It was ridiculous. I just got really mad in 2022. Got really mad, had a huge year, barely made it, holy man, that was crazy, but I took everything I could do because I had loans to pay off and I paid them all off in 12 months. But after that I'm like I can't live like this anymore. I can't live with this kind of pressure on myself. I have to be kinder to myself somehow. Yeah, so I got a great doctor good, that helped me lose the weight. I went on hormone replacement therapy. I quit drinking I'm almost done smoking and I just slowed down and said no more often. My time is very now, so I don't want to take on the world anymore. Everything that I do have in my life, I want to do really well and be very successful at that. But volume is not in my world anymore.
33:04 - Speaker 1
Let me ask you this when did we come out of that learning lesson 22, 23-ish, we came out of that lesson, yeah, if you look back at, like the Lynn Fletcher, because obviously that was a key defining moment in your life, for your business, for everything, for Lynn. But if you look at all of those lessons and then the other lessons that you've learned since then, does it surprise you of your capacity for growth?
33:28 - Speaker 2
100% the grit and the sheer stubbornness and the ability to dig deep and deep and deeper and then some more. Do what I can and then do a little bit more, because I was so mad at myself at the world, but in hindsight it was the greatest blessing that I ever could have been given was to be knocked down like that, just like when I got fired from my pink tornado job and when I left my first husband. Those crises made me who I am today and they made me the strong person that I am today, because I had to fight for it, I had to work for it. People that get it given to them on a silver platter and have everybody learn for them. I learned everything from the ground up. I'm like going to school uphill both ways kind of gal, and I get shit poured all the time at work. But I wasn't going to be satisfied until I knew what I knew and knew what I needed to do next.
34:25 - Speaker 1
So, taking all of those experiences, all of those environments, knowing what you know now, what does legacy look like for you, moving forward?
34:38 - Speaker 2
I often wonder, yeah, a little scared, not going to lie, but I think legacy is the world of hard work and don't stop for mediocre, don't accept medium, never accept mediocrity. And I have people coming back to me now that used to work for me, that have done the gamut, and they're all in great other places and they always say the bar that I have to work in. I learned that from you. I learned how high that bar needs to be in order to be exceptional in our community. What I want to be remembered and known for is the uplift of the community that I've given. Sometimes I'm like you can do it, girl, oh yeah. Other times I'm like get off your ass, let's go, I'm going to help you. Let's do the floods of 2013. Same thing, yes, so many weddings at that time. That's a whole other show too. But I always jump in both feet, personally and professionally. Anytime I can give my experience or my talent or my skills, I'm in. I'm wearing the t-shirt. In fact, I'll make the t-shirt and there may be sparkles on it. There's always sparkles. Glitter vinyl baby with my cricket is always sparkles. But, business wise, I'm just getting kind of started.
35:53
I feel like I finally hit my stride at 55. I figured it out. I think I figured it out. You're mid-career, you're mid-career. I got 10, 15 more years left in me. I'm not even thinking about that. I don't know what that looks like, but you know. What I do know Is that whatever is right will happen. I'm a firm believer in that. That the world again gives you what you need and not what you want. So it might not be somebody to buy my company for $3 million or whatever I'm exaggerating but it might be just an epiphany or a message that says okay, now you can go teach again. You can teach when you're old. You don't have to take 50,000 steps in on a Saturday. You can become a marriage commissioner. You can marry people. I don't know, we'll see. The world hasn't really told me what I'm going to do then, but I got lots of time left and hundreds and hundreds of weddings to do still.
36:46 - Speaker 1
We love it. Share with us, please, and thank you, a quote or a mantra that you live by? You probably have a couple.
36:55 - Speaker 2
Yeah, I'm just trying to think of a good one. Well things my dad said like making magic happen. Whatever situation you're in, figure out how to make the magic happen. He also told me one time I got told this in junior high you do your very, very, very best, and then you push a little bit more. And you do a little bit of that every week of your life, every day of very best, and then you push a little bit more and you do a little bit of that every week of your life, every day of your life. And Kobe Bryant, michael Jordan all these people talk about that all the time being 1% better, not every day, not every week and not every month, maybe every year. You get 1% better. And then you're just astonished where you end up after a while and you look back and you're like, damn, I did good, do a little bit better, do better. Do you apply that all the time? I'm like, just do better.
37:43 - Speaker 1
You apply that same philosophy or approach to both personal and business. Yeah, I think that's a great key takeaway for anyone in business, no matter where you are, whether or not you're in a startup, a scale up an enterprise, whether you're a non-for-profit, for-profit. I think that's a beautiful anchor you can't know everything.
38:03 - Speaker 2
You can't. It's ridiculous. You're a startup for 10 years. Who's kidding who here? You just got to learn. You have to make mistakes. You hear it all the time. You learn from your mistakes more than you do your success. You have to make mistakes. You hear it all the time. You learn from your mistakes more than you do your success. You make a hundred mistakes to one successful thing. I know it sucks, but I hate making mistakes. Oh, I don't like it at all, but I've learned to see them as learning. Things like okay, every Monday we get together and I casually just go to all my planners and I go okay, what happened? That was awesome. They all know this. They just say it anyways. What?
38:44 - Speaker 1
happened. That was awesome.
38:46 - Speaker 2
What happened? That was a super duper curve ball that you dealt with and what could we have done better? Name one thing per wedding that we can change. Either that's a template or it's what you say to your team in your team brief what we need in the toolkit. Maybe we need black socks in the emergency kit, which we do because grooms and dads and groomsmen they all forget their socks sometimes Something like I needed to get this guy a pair of socks and I didn't have a pair of socks. So let's put socks in the emergency kit, like we do one thing per wedding every week.
39:21
I want to celebrate them. I want to brainstorm curve balls, because that's your toolkit and that's what makes you valuable as an expert and as a professional that they're paying a lot of money for. They want you to have a ginormous toolbox of curveballs that you've been through before and they're done. That scene at all Probably had everything happen to me in my lifetime. I don't know We'll see moving forward. Also, have the humility to know that you're not perfect. It's not perfect. Your wedding did not go perfect. There's always something to improve on. I'm making templates, even today. Almost every day I make a template or I change a template. I'm never satisfied. That's why I don't do like wedding planning programs, online planning programs or whatever they're called.
40:05 - Speaker 1
Because you're always in continuous improvement, continuous refinement.
40:08 - Speaker 2
I'm always changing it. I'm not going to pay a lot of money that I'm not going to like tomorrow, so it's good old spreadsheets for me, that's okay. I'm old school. I'm not going to pay a lot of money that I'm not going to like tomorrow, so it's good old spreadsheets for me, that's okay.
40:16 - Speaker 1
I'm old school, I'm pre-Google, I'm pre-Google Me too, as we look to wrap up our time together. What would be one thing?
40:24 - Speaker 2
Oh really, I know, I know.
40:26 - Speaker 1
What would be one thing, one thought maybe, especially where, like, heart and business collide. What's one thought that you could leave the audience with today?
40:35 - Speaker 2
You don't change the world by being loud. You change the world by being quiet. You listen and you notice things around you. I've never got a staff member with an ad. I've just put it out in there to the world got quiet. Somebody crossed my path and I was paying attention. I'm like, hey, what are you doing with your life? You want to work for me, because I know the world is going to give me what I need Maybe not what I want, but what I need. So be quiet and be a server. You're not a commander. You're not the boss. Bosses are the most servers. Actually, I think you don't become a leader by being in control and like being a dictator. You become a leader from starting on the ground and lifting people up to where you need them to be, and then they end up going further. So just be quiet and listen and admit like, be humble, reach for things you don't know, ask questions, be a learner for life.
41:35 - Speaker 1
I've always known. But today has been a great gift because I realized that as beautiful as you are on the outside, you are even more beautiful on the inside. Thanks for being with me today.
41:49 - Speaker 2
Thank you. You're amazing too. Fan for life. This was fun, thank you.
41:56 - Speaker 1
Thank you. You're amazing too. Fan for life. This was fun, thank you. That's a wrap on this episode of Live Learn. Lead with me, alison Geskin. If today's conversation made you think, gave you a new perspective or sparked an idea, let's keep it going. Connect with me on LinkedIn or visit theartofstrategyca and, if you haven't already hit that, subscribe so you never miss an episode. Oh, and, if you loved the episode, leave a review or share it with someone who needs to hear this. Until next time, keep learning, keep leading and keep showing up.