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This episode of The Real Retirement Show, hosted by Yasmin and Kathleen, delves into the concept of retirement beyond just finances, exploring the multifaceted aspects of a vibrant retirement journey. Guest Brenda Sutton shares her transformative approach to retirement, which she terms 'rewirement,' focusing on alignment, love, inspiration, vitality, and ease. Brenda discusses her past career, the transition into rewirement, overcoming fears, and embracing new adventures with the aim of livin...
This episode of The Real Retirement Show, hosted by Yasmin and Kathleen, delves into the concept of retirement beyond just finances, exploring the multifaceted aspects of a vibrant retirement journey. Guest Brenda Sutton shares her transformative approach to retirement, which she terms 'rewirement,' focusing on alignment, love, inspiration, vitality, and ease. Brenda discusses her past career, the transition into rewirement, overcoming fears, and embracing new adventures with the aim of living a purpose-driven life filled with joy and meaning. The episode offers insightful reflections, actionable advice, and emphasizes the importance of mindset, curiosity, and intention in crafting a fulfilling retirement journey.
Learn More about Brenda Sutton: https://brendalsutton.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/traveling_transformations/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Fun2havnlife
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/brenda-sutton-7207a59/
Real Retirement Video Podcast: Real Retirement - YouTube
Welcome to "Real Retirement," a groundbreaking podcast where your hosts, Yasmin Nguyen and Kathleen Mundy, delve into the multifaceted world of retirement beyond the numbers. This isn't your typical retirement discussion; it's a vibrant journey into what retirement truly means in today's world.
Each episode of "Real Retirement" brings you compelling conversations with guests who bring a wealth of expertise and authentic retirement life experiences. Our goal? To inspire and educate our listeners to approach retirement with intentionality and a broader perspective.
But "Real Retirement" is more than just a podcast. It's a community for those navigating the uncharted waters of retirement, whether you're just starting to plan or are already on this deeply personal journey. We explore a wide array of topics, including:
What sets "Real Retirement" apart? It's our commitment to authenticity. We bring you real stories from real retirees, discussing real challenges, surprises, joys, heartaches, and the myriad emotions that come with retirement. From addressing family dynamics to confronting identity shifts, we tackle the issues that truly matter to retirees.
Join Yasmin and Kathleen as they journey through the honest and often unspoken aspects of retirement. "Real Retirement" isn't just about ending a career; it's about beginning a new, exciting chapter of life with all its complexities and joys. Tune in and be part of a conversation that redefines retirement in the most real way possible.
Brenda: I decided that my decade
was going to be 55 is alive.
So alive for me is alignment.
is what I'm doing and who I'm
spending time with and how I'm making
money aligned with my value, my
passion, my strength, what I love.
Okay.
The L is love.
Am I surrounded by people
that love who I am?
And do I love what I'm doing?
And am I spending time
with people that I love?
The I is inspiration.
So I want to be an inspiration,
and I want to be around people.
That are inspiring for me as well.
And V is vitality.
So I'm very focused on vitality right now.
I feel like this is as strong
as I'm ever going to be.
And I'm grateful for that.
And I want to do what I can.
Within my own means to continue to, have
great vitality in my life and then ease.
There were a lot of really hard,
challenging, hard working years
that grind is, Not something that
I want to sustain any longer.
So I want to make sure that I am creating
ease in my life every day because I think
ease supports vitality and it takes all
of that to be alive, to really be alive.
Yasmin: Welcome back to
The Real Retirement Show.
My name is Yasmin, here
with my co host Kathleen.
Whether you're retired or thinking about
retirement, we delve into the multifaceted
world of retirement beyond the finances.
This isn't your typical
retirement discussion.
It's a vibrant journey into what
retirement truly means in today's world.
We bring you real stories from real
retirees and experts discussing real
challenges, surprises, and challenges,
joys, heartaches, and the myriad of
emotions that come with retirement.
From addressing family dynamics,
to mental and physical health, to
finding purpose, we tackle the issues
that truly matter to retirees and
those thinking about retirement.
In today's episode, we dive into the
inspiring journey of Brenda Sutton, a
trailblazer who transformed her retirement
into a vibrant chapter of rewirement.
Brenda shares her profound philosophy
of living a life that's truly
alive through alignment, love,
inspiration, vitality, and ease.
Discover how she navigated the
transition from a fulfilling career
to embracing new adventures, facing
fears, and redefining abundance.
Discover how she navigated the
transition from a fulfilling career
to embracing new adventures, facing
fears, and redefining abundance.
Learn from her experiences of overcoming
physical and mental barriers to
lead an active, purpose driven life.
Whether you're nearing retirement or
in the midst of it, or simply seeking
to infuse your life with more meaning
and joy, this episode is a treasure
trove of wisdom and actionable insights.
Join us as Brenda illuminates the
path to a life where every day
is an opportunity to design your
destiny and live with intention.
Get ready to be motivated, to
reflect on what makes you feel
alive, and and to embrace the journey
of constant evolution and growth.
Let's join our conversation.
Brenda, it is such a joy
to have you join us today.
We've known each other for many years
now, I've had the privilege of coming and
speaking to your, organization and helping
share the joy and this idea of retirement
back in the day, Brenda, for those who
haven't gotten a chance to get to know
you, would you share a little bit about
your career journey prior to retiring?
And what was life like before you made
the big, Step into this next chapter.
I worked at the same organization
for about 36 years, spent most of
that time in employee development,
helping people grow their careers,
learn their job and navigate change.
I was working hard and I was
a single mom and a homeowner.
So life was.
busy.
And there just came this point when
I knew, I get these like hits and I
knew Oh, within the next five years,
I don't want to be this busy anymore.
I want to, have a different level and a
different quality of busyness in my life.
And that's when I started looking
to transitioning myself towards,
rewirement away from corporate
into doing some other things.
Brenda, you were in a role where
you got a chance to not only connect
with so many people, but influence
them and their journey as well too.
And, what was it like as you
were preparing for retirement
and leaving that role in which
you were not only recognized,
but you were making a big impact.
Brenda: Yeah, I was one of those
kinds of people that everybody knew.
When I would go on the elevator,
everybody knew who I was.
I created a lot of programs at
the company and would do classes,
and when I would post a class,
it would immediately fill up.
and so I felt like I had a community.
I developed a community there.
And so it was very interesting when
I was thinking that I was leaving,
the company because I couldn't
figure out why it was so hard.
It was a no brainer that I would
start a new chapter in my life, but I
couldn't figure out why it was so hard.
And one day I realized.
Oh, I've been in a 36 year
marriage with this company.
Basically I have 36
years of relationships.
everybody knows me and I have a whole
bunch of friends and, oh, that wasn't
what I planned on letting go of, And
so that was, one of the things that I
had to overcome in myself is, Oh, okay.
I realize now community is important
to me and I'll be making a conscious
decision to probably shift that community.
and the other thing that was in
my way was this fear that had
been driving me for a long time.
everyone has heard of like the scarcity
abundance model and I have done so
much work in my life and tried to like
visualize abundance and I have Abundant
love in my life, but I have yet to
feel like I have abundant money and to
be able to visualize abundant money.
And as somebody in this coaching realm,
like that's, nobody admits that they feel
that way in the coaching world, because,
because we're going to create abundance.
And so I decided for me that I
was having a hard time with that.
And if I'm thinking scarcity or abundance
and I can't get to abundance that I'm
never going to feel I can leave corporate.
So what's in between?
What's in between scarcity and abundance
that I can wrap my hands around?
So I decided the first step is
for me to believe and have faith
that I will always have enough.
There will be enough to pay my bills,
to pay my mortgage, to make sure
the lights are kept on and to eat.
can I assume and trust that
there will be enough in my life?
But enough, when you've been
working in corporate, doesn't
really feel like it's enough.
So what's between enough and abundance?
So I decided plenty.
if I could just trust that
I would at least find a way
to create plenty in my life.
And what is plenty for me?
It means I can go out to
dinner once in a while.
I can have a martini once in a while.
I can take a trip once in a while.
and maybe there's going to be a day
that plenty and abundance just merge
for me, but in order to get abundance
and feel abundance when it comes to
money, I had to create this model
for myself in trusting and believing
that I will always have enough.
And that I have the ability to create
plenty in my life so that I can
feel like I can, take risks and make
changes in my life and not rely on
staying in the same place any longer,
Kathleen: wow.
I can really relate to that, Brenda,
because those are experiences that I
think a lot of single women have, and it
is, you're always looking for abundance,
but just having that, confidence that
there will always be enough to make sure
that your life is stable and sustainable.
And that allows you the freedom
to worry about other things.
Brenda: Right?
I wish I would have thought about
it earlier because I feel like
I spent many of years in fear.
In this scarcity, like when you're
a single mom, you lose your job,
you lose your house, where are
you and your kids going to sleep?
that's the bottom line.
And so if I just, even all those years
could have just trusted that there
would be enough and there always was,
then just that alone would have made my
life feel so much easier along the way.
Yeah.
our mindset and our beliefs, they
make a huge difference in the
quality of life and the amount
of stress that we have every day.
Yasmin: That's so true, Brenda.
And I'm curious, What sort of mindsets
and what sort of beliefs did you have
in your first year of retirement?
and what did you focus on?
Br: Yeah, I created this hub and
spoke model because I was like, of course,
what am I going to do to meet the gap?
And I had it all figured out.
Okay.
All the ways that I could make
money and they were all categorized
in these different ways.
And, that was going to
be my next adventure.
And when I, Left corporate, I just
felt like I needed to explore.
I went to Peru, I did
this rockstar road trip.
So basically I grabbed my teardrop
trailer and I did this tour through,
Washington and Oregon to visit like
20 different rockstar gal friends
that were business owners or, high,
Amazing women doing the juggle of life.
and then I also did some hiking
and backpacking during that trip.
and when I came back, I was ready to
implement my hub and spoke model with
all these different things that I
could do, but I found myself not really
wanting to return the calls and not
really wanting to get started on it.
So then of course, What do you do?
I was shoulding all over myself, right?
Like I should be doing this and I should
be doing this and I should be doing this.
and then part of the shooting was
like, this is the time in my life
when I should wake up and I should
journal and I should meditate and
I got to do all the bright things.
and so I spent a good year
or so actually doing that and
exploring lots of different.
Things having a lot of fun,
backpacking in the sawtooths,
pushing my strength to the edge.
and that's when I started realizing.
When I looked at my time, like I'm active
at least four hours a day and all these
things that I say I'm going to do that,
by the way, we'll make a lot of money.
You know, they're not active things.
They require me to go back into the
cubicle, maybe not all year, but I
have to be in front of my computer and
I thought, okay, something's got to
change cause I'm not feeling the draw.
And, And so that's when I started
thinking, wow, I wonder if I could mix
like mindset and movement together.
And.
do something, around that because
this, the data's out, humans are not
active enough and it's impacting their
quality of life and their health.
And so I'm active at
least four hours a day.
And so clearly I need to get paid
to do something that's active.
What would that be, so that's where
I started shifting a little bit,
Kath: I'm so impressed with your
dedication to, the design of your journey.
that's something that I think takes
a lot of work, even if it's just
mindset work to put yourself in
that position to start designing
the future that you want to live.
And, I'm curious about a comment
that you said, a few minutes ago,
and that was that you didn't retire.
It was rewirement.
Brenda: right?
Kathleen: can you give us a
little bit of information?
How did you come up with that?
And what's the concept behind that term?
Bre: Yeah, I mean I was I'm only
I'm 57, but I was only 55 55 Like
you're not old enough to retire, What
we have said retirement is just not
what I am willing to do when I'm 55.
And so I decided that's the
time when it's rewirement.
You rewire what you're doing.
I stood back and said,
okay, what am I good at?
What do I love?
What am I passionate about?
what do I want to let go of?
All these things.
And then now I get to design my next step.
See, I believe we design
our life every day.
One action, reaction, decision, everything
we say and do designs our life experience.
And so, I feel like I just have been
doing that over and over in my life.
Now, I am designing this rewirement phase.
and I think that, retirement isn't
like it used to be also, whether you're
65 or 55 when you leave corporate.
I don't mean to be blunt, but if you
don't know what you want to do, retirement
for a lot of people is just redirement.
Basically, you end up, people die.
They fizzle away.
They literally fizzle away if they
can't figure out how to rewire.
Rather than just retire.
As humans, we need something to do.
We need a passion and a purpose.
K: you hit the nail on the head.
The purpose is the thing that drives and
motivates and keeps us moving forward and
helps us enjoy conversations like this.
Yasmin: Brenda, I remember in a
previous conversation, you shared
with me your relationship with,
Physical activity in your body.
How did you rewire your mindset
and your body as well to really
step into a chapter now in which
activity is so important to you
Bre: Well, it's kind of amazing.
a lot of the people that I know
now would be like, Brenda's been
active forever, but that's not true.
I had a foot issue and was on
the sidelines, excused from
physical education my entire life.
I was not active until
I was in my thirties.
I had never even walked two miles
until I was in my thirties, and now
I have hiked and backpacked some
of the hardest things out there.
after I had my foot fixed, there
was still another, I think,
almost a decade that in my mind, I
still didn't think I could do it.
It was just so interesting.
It's so interesting how
powerful our mind is.
and then there were a couple of years that
I experienced some deep, dark depression.
And during that time, I realized I
needed to be walking and exercising.
And that's when I started
walking regularly.
And that's of bumped myself up
to like regular two mile walks.
But I still all of those years
didn't think that I could
ever do any more than that.
It was my eight year old daughter
that coached me around a half
mile loop in the neighborhood.
Because one day out of the blue,
I said, I want to run this loop.
And she coached me around that loop.
She was in a martial arts class.
So she warmed me up in the driveway,
coached me around that loop.
And that summer I ran the hood to coast.
And that was the start.
Kathleen: Wow.
Wow.
Bre: and even if we haven't been
active all of our life, we can start now.
And it just starts with small steps
and figuring out what works for us
to be more active inside, outside,
walking, running, strength training.
What is it?
Yasmin: Brenda, for those who
are not familiar with the hood to
coast, would you share what that is?
Kathleen: I would love
to know what that is.
Brenda: it's a relay race that
goes from Mount Hood in Oregon,
all the way to the beach.
I didn't bring my notes on this,
so I don't know how many miles,
but everybody gets like three legs.
they're like 7 to 10 mile legs,
and you take turns running
this obstacle course together.
and it goes all the way from Mount
Hood to the beach, the coast.
And,
Kathleen: I'm sorry, I have
to interrupt you right here.
You're telling me that you did
one of these legs 7 to 10 miles?
And before,
Brenda: three of them.
Everybody does three legs.
Kathleen: wow, I'm impressed.
Brenda: Yeah.
Kathleen: Wow, I'm impressed.
I'm impressed.
Bren: mean, those legs are broke
but it's amazing.
Like that was within six months
of me running my first half mile.
And only a couple of years prior to
that, I never would have ever thought
that I would even walk more than
two miles, I would tell my friends.
They'd say, Brenda, do
you want to go on a hike?
And they'd be like, how long is it?
Well, it's only three miles.
And I'm like, I can't go, sorry.
I can't do three mile.
Yeah.
Yeah, until one of them, one of my friends
came in my living room and looked at me
and said, You know what I call BS on you.
I see you dance.
I know you can hike.
And next time we go, you're coming.
You know, we need those
kinds of friends, right?
We need that because sometimes it's
hard to see in ourselves what we
are capable of and the feeling of
breaking through, of something that
you didn't think you were capable of
to get to the other side is incredible.
It's really incredible.
Yas: That's so powerful, Brenda.
Having those relationships, that
type of community to, again, see
you for what sometimes we can't
see in ourselves, but also hold
your hand, give you a little nudge.
I so appreciate that Kathleen and I
have been on this journey and she's
constantly nudging me as well as
I'm nudging her in other ways too.
But those are the relationships that
give us, This light, the hope that,
move us forward when we think that we
can only go so far and really supports
that mindset that you've, shared so far.
Kathlee: I think that one of the
things that coaches do, really that's,
I think their role is to nudge,
encourage, and support certainly
to a large extent, but you can't
support until you nudge and encourage.
So I think that it's Incredibly important
to recognize that nudging is a good
thing and it's how the wheel starts.
the sign behind you and the first
word at the top there that says alive.
And when I think of you and just the
conversations we've had, the times we've
spent together, I always feel this theme
or this sense of aliveness from you, even
as you've transitioned from one chapter to
the next, would you share with us a little
bit about what a alive looks like for you?
And, how do others experience aliveness?
Especially in retirement.
Brenda: sure.
First, before I do though,
anything that I've shared or
that's talked about, remember we
get to define it for ourselves.
Okay, any of these terms that
we've talked about or thrown
around, we get to define ourselves.
So I get to define what ALIVE is
for me, and that could be totally
different for everyone else.
people do these words of the year
or whatever, and I can never get
a word, so I made an acronym.
It's a major life
decision to create a word.
I decided that my decade
was going to be 55 is alive.
and what is alive for me.
So alive for me is alignment.
So that's what I'm making.
Okay.
is what I'm doing and who I'm
spending time with and how I'm making
money aligned with my value, my
passion, my strength, what I love.
Okay.
The L is love.
Am I surrounded by people
that love who I am?
And do I love what I'm doing?
And am I spending time
with people that I love?
The I is inspiration.
So I want to be an inspiration,
and I want to be around people.
That are inspiring for me as well.
And V is vitality.
So I'm very focused on vitality right now.
I feel like this is as strong
as I'm ever going to be.
And I'm grateful for that.
And I want to do what I can.
Within my own means to continue to, have
great vitality in my life and then ease.
There were a lot of really hard,
challenging, hard working years
that grind is, Not something that
I want to sustain any longer.
So I want to make sure that I am creating
ease in my life every day because I think
ease supports vitality and it takes all
of that to be alive, to really be alive.
Kathleen: a great mantra.
Brenda: And everyone can make
up their own mantra, right?
Their own word, their own acronym, and
we can redefine it anytime we want.
Thank you.
Kathlee: I'm going to be honest.
our whole show is all about, real
people and honest impressions.
And I feel like right
now, you've inspired me.
I feel like I've fallen behind and,
but I think it's really important to
recognize, where you might have areas
that you want to pay more attention to and
maybe develop a stronger feeling towards
that area of your life, and sometimes
we don't take the time to reflect.
And sometimes, as you've done,
holding up a mirror, wow, that
reflection comes clear and bold to us.
I'm all ears here.
I'm in, and I'm all ears.
So I'm really enjoying this.
I needed this.
Brenda: be good to yourself and
I know there's a whole laundry
list of successful, amazing things
that you've done and look at the
vitality you have going on that you
get to work with and just continue
making things better for yourself.
Yasm: Brenda, I appreciated that
before you shared what aliveness
was for you, that you mentioned
that it's different for everyone.
And I think it's similar with this
concept of joy, which I've explored
deeply on is that joy is not
something you sustain continually.
And I would imagine aliveness is similar
in that we have moments of aliveness
and there are moments in which.
We might not have that perhaps alignment
or inspiration or vitality and that's
okay because it gives us a chance
in the next moment to experience
aliveness or experience joy too.
And so it's a choice.
It's a mindset, like you said, and having
the clarity on What is it that impacts?
What is it that, activates our aliveness?
Like in your case, it's the alignment,
the love, the inspiration, vitality, it's
the ease gives us that clarity to be able
to perhaps re engage in that experience.
Brenda: Yeah.
And also one of the big questions I
ask myself regularly is what's most
important to me over and over again.
It keeps me, in line with what's
most important to me, if you're in
the middle of a challenging thing.
moment with someone in a
relationship, it, it keeps your
words straight up too, right?
It keeps your reactions straight up.
What's most important to me?
And so it's just really
a powerful question.
What's most important to me today or
in this moment, is very related to
living a life that's alive and alive
is, sometimes it's scary, right?
and that's okay.
I'm going to Portland state right now
and I'm engaging myself in group fitness.
And, I realized in this moment
on my way down there to my class,
Oh my gosh, I am so excited.
And I'm so scared.
Like I have to lead this class.
I'm 57.
I do not look like the other
group instructors, okay, in
their workout top and spandex.
Yes.
and so I was like, Oh my gosh, I have
like, Oh my gosh, I'm so excited.
I'm like, Oh, I am so scared.
And I was like, Oh my gosh, that is
have a question for you, and I
love the way you've explained this to us,
but if you're dealing with your concept of
being alive, how would you help a retiree
who is spending their first year kind of
excited and involved in what they thought
retirement was for them, but then they
found in the second year, things shifted.
And how would you help them discover that
alive feeling that you've described to us?
Brenda: I actually have an
acronym for REWIRE that's a whole
bunch of different questions.
to really think about how
we want to define that our
rewirement stage of our life.
So that we can be living it consciously.
If we're living it consciously and we're
at least somewhat focused on what's most
important to us, we're probably going
to be on the scale, the aliveness scale
somewhere, if we're of doing our day and
getting through our days, then slowly,
that's just going to take over us.
and it doesn't mean that it's not going to
be a quality day or a quality experience,
but it's a different quality experience
when you're designing it as you go, when
you're curious about it, and when you
ask yourself, what's most important?
Do I feel alive?
And if yes, then Great.
I'll keep doing this.
If no, what one thing do I want to shift?
Ernest Hemingway says, change
happens gradually and then suddenly.
That's our life.
That's our experience all the time.
Kat: You mentioned something and
I, it really sparked, an interest.
The word was curiosity.
Talk to us a little bit about your,
approach to that element within your life.
B: think being curious is magic.
Being curious, about everything, helps
us to Again, design our experience.
It helps us be more
compassionate with other people.
It helps us learn.
It helps us, know what we may or
may not want to do in our next step.
it keeps us young.
I think that practicing curiosity
is, it's a daily practice
more than a daily practice.
It's an all the time practice.
and, you know, Yeah, being curious
is quite a spice for our life.
It's necessary for expanding
our experience in our life.
And it helps us with our loved ones.
It helps us with our experience every
day, just going to the grocery store.
I love food.
The word curious.
It's been my word before.
Ka: I just wonder if you believe
curiosity is the fuel for vitality
Brenda: Oh, I think it's part
of mean, I think that the fuel
for vitality, it's like pie.
There's a whole bunch of different
ingredients and those ingredients
would be different for everybody.
And that's the thing.
When we have a word, we get
to define it and change it.
We get to mold it and grow it.
Anytime we want.
So yes, definitely.
Curiosity would be part of that.
And so when we have a word or an
acronym, we get to break it down.
and so in rewirement, when we
think about what we want, I think
breaking it down is important and
revisiting it and rewriting it,
what's working, what's not,
what do I want to do different?
And that's that change happens gradually.
And then suddenly you
go, Oh my gosh, I'm here.
This is my life.
I was just a single mom
and this is my life.
This is amazing.
Yasmin: Yeah.
Brenda, I'm curious.
what have you been curious about lately?
well, I'm spending a bit of time
with my, parents as they get older, and
there's so many things nobody tells us.
I'm trying really hard to be curious
about the challenges that people have
when they get older they don't tell us.
And we don't know.
And so we don't even necessarily act as
compassionate as we could if we knew.
And I sort of have this, I'm always
trying to learn, be compassionate with
people because I feel like there's been
times in my life that I've been like this
150%, 150 percent of the time person.
And, that if I can't have compassion,
then I'm gifted that experience.
There's been a couple experiences
I've been gifted that I'm like,
I don't want to do that again.
And so I really try hard now to maybe
that's selfish to be to really try
to explore other people's experience.
And right now it is definitely the
experience of my aging parents that
I'm really, really curious about.
I'm also, very curious about
the human condition and.
How can I organically encourage people
to be more active in a way that it's
fun for them and it gradually and then
suddenly starts impacting their health?
Yasmin: Is there a mindset shift
that you can help someone be more
active who may have had more of
a sedentary habit at this stage?
Brenda: Well, I think
that's also like pie.
There's lots of
ingredients to that, right?
so, we have to know why, you know?
Yeah, isn't it?
Yeah.
Why?
So maybe someone has a grandchild
coming and they really have
noticed that it's getting hard
to get up and down off the floor.
Well, and they really want
to play with this grandchild.
They want to lift this this grandchild.
grandchild up, they want to
hold it, they want to crawl on
the floor with the grandchild.
There's a good why, right?
And so I think we have to explore, why and
what's in it for me if I start doing that.
But if people don't realize that, then if
they don't have a reason and can't Find
a reason that it's going to be harder for
them to be motivated to keep being active.
cause it's amazing as humans.
Like we think that we're not going to
be, that's not going to happen to us.
Kathleen: It's true.
Brenda: And so it has to
be something that's real.
Like we don't want to hurt our
back lifting our grand kid.
or, doing fun things in our life
that we want to be able to do.
We just don't want to get
hurt when we're doing them.
yeah, and act, activity looks
different at every age and every
stage and for everybody, right?
And so we have to design
that and make that up.
that sounds like an opportunity
to create a whole new brand of workouts
called, lifting your grandchild.
It's a whole different type of
exercise, you know, and lift press.
Kathleen: Actually, I, know
a lot of people who would
be involved in that, Yasmin.
I
Get to meet my great grandchild
this summer and I'm excited
because he's kind of a chunker.
So I know that I'm going
to really have to work out.
but you're to your point though,
Brenda, the, why is so compelling.
And if you can inspire yourself
with the possibility of seeing a
magnificent sunrise on the top of
the hill and that be your driving,
why it can really get you through.
Some of the physical
challenges to getting there.
Yes, I, did the sawtooths this
last summer with my partner and there were
times on that backpacking trip, you know,
like seven days, 12, 15 miles a day with
everything on my back with elevation, it's
very very challenging backpacking trip
that I was wondering Why am I doing this?
Why do I do this?
Like, when do I stop?
when am I too old and when do I stop?
And then, I get into this place where
it's just, kind of this quiet zone
of, there's no lights and no noise
and it's just, Pure nature and I'm
like, wow, and the sunsets and the sun
rises and the lakes and the animals.
And I'm like, this is why, I
never used to, but I'm like, oh my
gosh, do I really want to do this?
And that's when I have to
take myself back to that.
Why?
Yeah.
I do want to do
Kathl: I noticed on your website
you referred to, walk and talk.
Can you tell us a little bit about that?
Brenda: do.
I do.
Walk and talk started for
me in the corporate world.
because people all over the company
would call me, um, and ask if they
could spend time with me talking
about their next career step.
it really wasn't necessarily my
job to talk to people about that.
and so I decided that if it was under 30
minutes, And if they were able, and we
were walking and talking, I would always
allow for that time on my calendar.
And so that's where it started.
before I left corporate, I actually, got
certified to be a professional coach and
I was doing different types of coaching
and I went back to the walk and talk
coaching because so much happens for us
when we're moving like the epiphanies
The conversation is just so easy and
I'm not talking about a, grinding walk.
I'm just talking about casual
movement, walk and talk coaching.
and so I've grown to really like that
style of working with people when they're
processing a change that they want to make
or when they're thinking something over
or need to talk about, communication or
analyze, that next step in their life.
yeah, walk and talk
coaching is my favorite.
Ya: Well, Brenda, you and I have
had at least a handful of walk in talks
together in person, and I can certainly
attest that, not only does it get the
blood flowing, but sure, the ideas, the
inspiration, and there's studies that have
shown the direct connection between our
physiology as well as our psychology, and
it certainly impacts our moods as well.
So I can give you a testimonial
on the benefits of it.
Brenda: Yeah.
It's my favorite way to see the
epiphanies come, through people.
Yeah.
Y: Brenda, as we, reflect on our
conversation today, what advice would
you share with someone who is either
preparing to retire or perhaps they're
in that first phase of retirement
in which they're or rewirement,
let me say that, they're looking to
experience aliveness in their own way.
Brenda: I mean, there's the
practical side, I think it's great
to kind of evaluate that gap.
And the other practical thing I did was
two years prior to leaving corporate, I
actually lived off of the amount of money
that I would have when I left and all
of the other money I put into my house.
And so I invested it in things
that I knew that I would want
to invest in, in my home.
so that's the practical side.
The other thing is, I think that, that
curiosity and taking a deep dive and
thinking about what we, you What we love,
what we're good at, what we're passionate
about, what we don't love, all of that,
and really paying attention to that and
thinking about how we can design our
life to have more of that in our life.
another thing is I think it's good
not to actually invest a lot of
money in the first couple of years.
people can be tempted to take
workshops and do things I think
that it's not a good idea, actually.
And I think that whatever work we do
and come up with in our investigations,
It's needed to get us to what we
might be doing during that time.
But it doesn't mean that that is
that what we've come up with is what
we're going to be doing in that time.
and then I also had to process some
times where it was like, I had a
consulting plan where I could do
something and, make a lot of money,
maybe just working 120 hours a year.
It sounds so great.
You know, I don't know where
the passion is in that look,
Kathleen: Yeah.
That's
Brenda: but yes.
it.
sounds great.
And some of those things can sound really
great, but, if they're not motivating
you and driving you, then actually
they could be taking up space until you
decide that's not what I'm going to do.
and of almost at the place where I might
just put some of that stuff to rest.
Like, Nope, I'm just not, this is working.
This is what I'm going to be doing.
And, you know, that'll be there if I
need it, I suppose, but I'm not putting
any more energy in that direction.
And, I guess there's also a, an element
of trust, really trusting and, I don't
know, just every day asking ourselves,
is this working and if not, what
little thing do I want to change up?
K: It sounds to me as though you
take census every day and you evaluate
what you've done, where you want to go.
Does it fit?
And I've, Yasmin knows I love shoes.
So does this pair of
shoes really fit well?
And if it doesn't, sometimes
you just have to let them go.
And move on.
And I think that it's, that's maybe
a metaphor that a lot of people
are not going to be, comfortable
with, but I think that you're right.
one of the things that Yasmin
and I talked about was I, when I
retired, I said yes to everything.
Anyone asked me anything,
I said, yes, I'll try it.
Yes, I'll do it.
And I very quickly discovered, I'm
not going to put effort into this
because it's not rewarding to me.
It's not fulfilling to me.
And I see no purpose in it.
And quite frankly, I think what you've
just described is a very similar approach
to accepting what comes your way and what
thoughts you have may not be the thoughts
that you keep in that retirement design.
Brenda: Totally, totally.
And not, and being okay with
that.
Like we don't have to shoot ourselves
just because, we, spent our day that way.
Like the next day is a new day.
And I could see how curiosity can.
Go to the extreme where it becomes FOMO
where not only are you curious, but
you've got this fear of missing out.
And so you say yes to everything
until you're depleted and you're,
you become out of alignment, right?
And that's where you pull back.
But, we have to be conscious
as to where our threshold of
curiosity steps into scarcity.
And we're able to, Maintain that
level of, in your case here,
Brenda, alignment, is this aligned?
Is this bringing me love?
Is, am I inspired?
Does this create vitality for me?
and is this ease?
and when you check in doing
reflection on that, then you
can say, Hey, you know what?
Maybe not right now or maybe
not ever, but that's okay.
Brenda: You know, what's really
fascinating is that, I did have
this time where, the very first
thing that I was scheduling, like,
you know, I had a morning and
afternoon and evening walking date.
Like for months You know,
I love all my people.
you know, what's so interesting is
yes, all that stuff ends up taking
your time and pretty soon you're
like, okay, like, where am I going?
Do I need to go somewhere?
Well, no, I don't need to go somewhere,
but I'm just, and is this fulfilling?
Well, it is.
But what's so fascinating is when
I started knowing that I wanted
to, start helping people to
become more active in their life.
And so I'm going to go to Portland State
and take these classes that help me
better understand movement and activity.
then it was clear how I
wanted to use my time.
It was really clear.
okay, two walks a week,
and so my filter changed.
now my filter is like study,
class, get ready for classes.
And.
Eat good and do my exercise and activity
and my partner and my family, but, and I
love my friends and they trickle in too.
but when you end up really honing in
on the why or the purpose, and that
is really clear, your time just, it
just automatically changes to support
that.
But if you don't have that,
it will fill up with other
Kathleen: stuff.
Yeah.
Could be a lot of stuff.
As we wrap up any final thoughts
from, you Brenda or Kathleen as well,
my thought is, I think this is
a fantastic episode and I think everyone
needs to listen to this and hopefully,
Brenda, you'll share it with all of your,
friends and family and your clients.
Because I think that sometimes when
they're in the jar with you, they're
They may not have the perspective
that you've shown us today.
So I really appreciate that.
It's been enlightening and motivating.
Thank you so much.
Brenda: it's fun.
I just feel like we slowly can shift
and design and create our experience.
And I know things happen with
our health, with our family,
and in our life, things come up.
And sometimes we have to reach to the
mindset to help us get through some
of those things that just come up
and feel like they're roadblocks, but
we still can navigate and maneuver.
And create, at least some of that
experience as we're moving through.
And, so I don't know, persistence and
curiosity and compassion and understanding
all of that stuff is in my pie
Kathl: I think that you've shown
us a lot of intention as well.
Well,
Brenda: And we do get hijacked
sometimes and that's okay.
Yeah.
Yasmin: Brenda, how does our
audience, find you and also,
engage or connect with you?
Brenda: I have my website,
um, brendalsutton.
com.
you can look me up on Facebook.
I have an Instagram right now
called Traveling Transformations
and I have Brenda Sutton also.
I'm not so good at
maintaining those things.
my Facebook is extremely just real me.
you can contact me through
my website for sure.
Yas: And I'll be sure to include
the links to your website, to your
Facebook and any other resources
that you think would be valuable.
And, we are so grateful, Brenda, for
you sharing your time, your wisdom,
your experience, your inspiration,
your aliveness with us today.
And, We're so delighted to have you.
Thank you.
Brenda: One more thing I'll
say, live large, love big,
stay strong, and have fun.
There you go.
Kathleen: we did today.
Thank you for all that fun we had.
Brenda: Yes.
Yasmin: Thank you.
Brenda: Thanks, both of you.
Kathlee: if anyone would like to
listen to more podcasts, just like
the brilliant one you've just heard,
don't forget, join our community and
have a lot more fun along the way.
Yasmin: Thank you for taking
the time to join us today.
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