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In this podcast hosted by the trailblazing founder of RE/MAX, Dave Liniger, we discover the secrets of those who have overcome challenges, pushed past their own limits, and experienced the best life has to offer.
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Unknown
You.
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Unknown
You.
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Speaker 1
Okay, we'll handle your introduction and stuff in the studio, but, let's get started this way. Brian, it's so great to talk to you. I don't know how many years we've been friends now, but it's 30 to 40. Yeah, at least 30.
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Speaker 2
Yeah. For sure.
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Speaker 1
As a long time ago. Yeah. And, you're one of the people that I admire most. in the business world, there's lots of reasons for that. And, a personal friendship as it developed out of that. I was wondering if you'd mind starting our program today with a little sketch about how you immigrated from Ireland. At what age and what transpired when you did.
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Speaker 2
Sure. So, born and raised Dublin, Ireland, son of, fifth generation painters and decorators and, I came out to America on a holiday and, came to San Diego. I had a brother living in Laguna Beach, and, he had a clothing store, and he said, hey, why don't you sell t shirts down at the beach for me?
00:04:01:16 - 00:04:26:04
Speaker 2
And I said, well, suntan sun girls, suntan girls selling t shirts in America. I'm 19 years old. This has got to be the dream situation. So I spent a summer selling, t shirts and sweatshirts down by Pacific Beach and, getting ready to head home. My only mode of transportation was this motorcycle. A little motor scooter, and, that my brother had loaned me.
00:04:26:04 - 00:04:47:15
Speaker 2
And seven days, October 22nd, 1986. I'm driving down this mountain, called Mount. Sold it out in La Hoya. And a guy I'm coming around is banned at 45 miles an hour, and this guy turns left across me. I never touch the brakes. Never did anything bang hit him head on. Was the first day ever warming helmet. Dave, you didn't have to wear a helmet back in those days.
00:04:47:17 - 00:05:09:11
Speaker 2
Split the helmet down the middle. Ended up having compound fractures, gangrene, everything. They were going to amputate my leg so didn't have insurance, didn't know what insurance was, and came from a socialized medicine background. So they end up put me in floor seven, Ward seven of the UK's Medical Center, where they put the prisoners, and I think they thought, you know, Irish guy.
00:05:09:12 - 00:05:25:16
Speaker 2
He'll get along great with the inmates. So, you know, that'll be no problem. And, got a guy next to me selling, trying to sell me bourbon, you know? So it was like, literally, I'm 19 years old. I'm a long way from home. And the doctor goes, we might have to take your leg off below the knee. So you.
00:05:25:16 - 00:05:47:18
Speaker 2
Thank God they didn't have to. I end up getting out of their surgeries. They put rods and screws down my legs. So I had to stay. And, 13 surgeries over the course of two years out, about a quarter million dollars in medical bills. So, you know, 1986 money, Dave, 250 grand was a lot of money. And, so that's kind of where I started.
00:05:47:18 - 00:06:05:19
Speaker 2
You know, I and I worked in a photo mass. I kept selling the t shirts, and then I saw a sign in a real estate window that said, we'll train you for free. And, you know, grown up in the trades as a painter, always interested in housing, I always had a predisposition to sales. And then free was the right number.
00:06:05:21 - 00:06:27:22
Speaker 2
So I got into real estate and I found out it was, to my liking and, you know, became the rookie, the heir for a company called ERA. My first year in real estate for the for the nation. And then I got recruited to this little company called Remax in, Mission Valley in San Diego. And I worked there for eight years and did really well.
00:06:27:23 - 00:06:50:04
Speaker 2
And then after that, people like yourself and other people said, hey, Brian, I was I was number five and Remax worldwide, and the next person to me was 30 years older than me. And I remember I was one of your senior leaders came and said, hey, would you come and sit on a panel? You're 30 years younger than everyone else that's in this top echelon.
00:06:50:06 - 00:07:07:14
Speaker 2
Would you tell people what you're doing and how you're doing it? And I would tell a few stories, you know, being Irish, and I would tell this system about working by referral and taking care of me. Customers and people just loved it. And I never forgot it was a Remax convention in Vegas, and it was a breakout session and people literally stood in line to talk.
00:07:07:14 - 00:07:21:02
Speaker 2
I was 28 years old, and people stood in line for an hour to talk to me. And I'm like, this is crazy because I was going there, going, you know, I don't have all the big marketing there was. There was fellas who had their names on their planes and this and, and the other night was just a house painter.
00:07:21:04 - 00:07:42:05
Speaker 2
But people resonated with this whole idea, taking great care their customers and doing a great job and getting referrals. And then I was asked by other regional people at Remax to do it, and then other companies and then speaker companies asked me to do it, and I thought, there's something to this. And, so I did a seminar in my local community and 500 realtors showed up and they were all people.
00:07:42:05 - 00:07:58:07
Speaker 2
I had done a transaction with. And like, I always want to know what you did. And then that started. So that was 28 years ago. I started, buffini and company and coaching and training people all over the world. And we've trained 3 million people now in 47 countries. And a lot of that is thanks to our friendship.
00:07:58:07 - 00:08:07:14
Speaker 2
So I'm, you know, I got to walk in the shadow of a giant. So, very helpful. So there it is. That's that's my story. And I'm sticking to it, Dave.
00:08:07:16 - 00:08:27:23
Speaker 1
But that's a marvelous story. And obviously, you had a great book that's out and published, The Immigrant Edge, which is a fascinating book. I'm almost two thirds of the way through it. great. And, I think it's a great book for anybody that is really trying to find out of what ambition and grit is all about.
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Speaker 1
so with that said, let's start asking some questions. So, Brian, how do you define grit and ambition and why are these qualities important for success in both the personal and professional endeavor?
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Speaker 2
Yeah. Well, I, you know, not just for my own story, Dave. I'd say for, you know, we now coaches, we're the largest business coaching company in North America. And I would say that that's the one trait, you know, that ambition. You can't do anything without ambition. and we can talk about that. The grit part is I just think it's everything.
00:09:01:04 - 00:09:21:11
Speaker 2
I think it's everything, you know? I mean, your own story. You know how many times you could have given up or thrown in the towel instead of building this giant corporation and one of the greatest franchise organizations of all time. You know, you this idea of grit, which is just a to me, it's about having the power of a made up mind that your mind is made up.
00:09:21:13 - 00:09:43:11
Speaker 2
You know, when we when we, you know, the Great Recession, the Great Recession in real estate, I had 27 competitors in the coaching business. And at the end of it, I had to and people had asked me and I do interviews. Some people said, what did you think about throwing in the towel? And we even had consultants said, hey, you'd be better off doing this and is it never even entered my mind to quit.
00:09:43:13 - 00:10:05:19
Speaker 2
It never entered my mind. So I just think that whole dynamic of grit, perseverance, never giving up and having a made up mind, is is everything. And then when it comes to ambition, you know, the first time I got exposed to this, I was actually asked to do a tour of Remax Europe. And what the Remax agents, did all over Europe was.
00:10:05:21 - 00:10:22:22
Speaker 2
They invited other companies to come. So I would go to Portugal and be 3000 people there, and I'd go to, I'd go to, Austria and they'd be 3000 people there. So it wasn't the Remax people used it as a great recruiting opportunity. And I would go and I'd speak to not only the Remax people, but also then the leaders of these other associations.
00:10:22:22 - 00:10:40:04
Speaker 2
And I'd say, what's the number one thing that I could help your audience with? Right. So it's Greece. It's got to be different than Spain has got to be different in Portugal. Eight out of eight countries that I spoke to, the leaders of the real estate communities in those areas all said, can you have fewer people, have more ambition?
00:10:40:06 - 00:11:01:06
Speaker 2
And I thought to myself at the time, like it shook me because I realized I'd never had to teach that to an American audience. But I will tell you, 28 years into it today, I feel the need to teach that to an American audience. And I think there's been those two things that you're focusing on in the perfect ten is a great example of us.
00:11:01:08 - 00:11:19:23
Speaker 2
I think ambition and grit are at an all time low. And I think I really think, I think to some great things about the younger generation and their desire for, you know, you know, quality of life and all that kind of good stuff. But I think it's a softer generation. I think it's not as gritty, and I think it's not as ambitious.
00:11:19:23 - 00:11:41:08
Speaker 2
And I that I think it's time for these messages from those of us who've been around the block a few times who are rags to riches stories, like you and me. I think it's important to share them. I'm glad this book is out. I'm glad you're doing your podcast. I'm glad you're focused on these two things because I think grit and ambition is becoming shorter supply and and, it separates you from the pack.
00:11:41:10 - 00:11:56:22
Speaker 1
You know, the things interesting about Europe is the old line countries, that were socialist or, semi democratic, right. were the ones that you were speaking to. Yeah. However, the new countries that got out of communism.
00:11:57:03 - 00:11:58:11
Speaker 2
Yes.
00:11:58:12 - 00:12:07:12
Speaker 1
Those people, had it so bad under the communist regimes. Yep. That they have ambition and grit to the gills, man. They they they want to go.
00:12:07:17 - 00:12:28:18
Speaker 2
The people in Czechoslovakia as an example. Right. And you know, these guys, you go there and they were hanging on every word. They were taking every note and doing extraordinary things. I'm seeing it now in South America. So the countries that didn't have exposure or who perhaps are under the thumb of a, a regime that didn't let the people grow and prosper, those people are on it like a dog on a pork chop.
00:12:28:18 - 00:12:44:21
Speaker 2
Right. Which makes sense. It's like the immigrant thing. I came here with nothing and came from a country that at the time was poor. I come to America, I'm like, let me at us, you know? So sometimes, you know, you have to do it. Not one thing I would say to them, you know, I got a big family, I got six kids.
00:12:45:02 - 00:13:02:06
Speaker 2
Yeah. So my kids are raised in a very different environment than I was raised in. They're raised in big family. Dad had a jazz, all this type of stuff. But I will tell you this. My kids are gritty and ambitious. I got a guy who's at the top of the Special forces in the military. I got a girl who's on the Olympic horse riding team.
00:13:02:11 - 00:13:22:10
Speaker 2
You know, I got kids. I have a five foot one girl who's the state champion setter. She set a record for assists, and no team would take her because she was five foot one. She has the leading assists. Like she passes the ball for a kill by a thousand. The record will never be touched. And so what I'm going to say is grit and ambition can be learned.
00:13:22:15 - 00:13:40:13
Speaker 2
Grit and ambition. It doesn't matter. You don't have to come from bad circumstances. You don't have to be broke. You don't have to be an immigrant. You don't have to have lived in Czechoslovakia. I think it's easier coming from those places because you have a greater appreciation. But I would say this, I've seen it my own kids, they didn't grow up wanting for anything, but they have grit and they have ambition.
00:13:40:13 - 00:13:45:05
Speaker 2
So I think it can be learned and and passed on to people.
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Speaker 1
I agree with that. Can you share a personal story or experience where grit played a significant role in achieving one of your own ambitious goals?
00:13:55:13 - 00:14:13:11
Speaker 2
Yeah, and again, I kind of touched on it in the opening, you know, you know, I had this desire to really impact people and share what did happen for me. And I found out not everybody in real estate had had the same success. And I really I really respect real estate people. You know, they they it's the pure form of entrepreneurism, right?
00:14:13:11 - 00:14:32:19
Speaker 2
You don't get paid unless you're 100% successful. And just, you know, when I first came out on the circus, it was a few years before I discovered you, but, you know, I had companies that's like. I remember speaking for a real estate company in Chicago, and they were from the cold called Dornoch kind of controlled environment.
00:14:32:19 - 00:14:51:20
Speaker 2
I'm talking about referrals, and I'm having a bit of fun with the door knocking type stuff in the cold calling, and they shut off the lights, you know, they shut off the lights in the bar room while I was speaking. your old nemesis, century 21, they put out a nationwide boycott of my seminars, and I wrote the CEO a letter, and I said, thank you.
00:14:51:22 - 00:15:11:04
Speaker 2
I said, thank you so much. at the time, the company was owned by an organization called Cendant. And I wrote the CEO a letter, and I said, your agents hate you. So you boycotting me is really help my attendance. You know what I mean? So just, you know, over and over again. So when I started this business, you know, I got people coming to me today, Dave, and you've had this.
00:15:11:05 - 00:15:34:22
Speaker 2
And I go, Brian, I want to be a speaker just like you. I want to travel the world. I want to have speak to thousands of people. And I go, are you willing to do what I did? 160 seminars a year in every town in North America you can imagine. I traveled for years and years and years and every crappy hotel you've ever been in, every bad ballroom you've ever seen with the worst introductions that could have me imagine, I.
00:15:35:03 - 00:15:52:06
Speaker 2
I did seminars where I showed up and they're supposed to be 800 people and seven showed up. I I've done seminars where I, one of my rivals actually hired, two people to work for me, who promoted an event and who basically lights. I show up to an event. They're supposed to be 700 people. There's nobody, you know.
00:15:52:06 - 00:16:12:03
Speaker 2
So the thing about it is, everybody looks at success from a distance, and they think it's this linear, raucous ascension. They look at Remax and here's this brand that's all over the world and whatever else. And again, you and your bride know that, you know, there were times you had someone coming in the front door signing up for a franchise, and they were going out the back door to make sure the lights were on, you know?
00:16:12:05 - 00:16:36:06
Speaker 2
So I, you know, the thing about it is it's every story of success has chapters of failure and every story of success. And you and I would both agree you have to learn from those things. So for me, the whole the business that is Buffini and company today, the largest coaching business in North America, I'd say at least on half a dozen occasions it faced extinction.
00:16:36:08 - 00:16:51:20
Speaker 2
And each time it came back better than ever. And now you're now. It's an institution. So I just think without that grit, without that ambition. You know what, Dave? You're probably not interviewing me today. I'm probably painting the outside of your house.
00:16:51:22 - 00:17:09:22
Speaker 1
Well, I had a similar 40 year tour with, Remax, traveling 200 days and 240 days a year. You know, it's a lonely life. very fulfilling. Yeah, but, now that my older age, I don't work quite that.
00:17:10:00 - 00:17:28:18
Speaker 2
Well, you know, and and it's one of the reasons I think we've connected so much over the years because, you know, we did spend a lot of those days on the road together and traveling and speaking together. And you developed this kinship because I know the price you paid and you know the price I paid. And that's why people who have grit and ambition recognize it in other people.
00:17:28:20 - 00:17:39:23
Speaker 1
Sure. So many individuals face setbacks and challenges on their journey to success. What advice do you have for overcoming adversity with grit and determination?
00:17:40:01 - 00:18:04:20
Speaker 2
Well, I know you're a big fan of Winston Churchill as I am, and one of my favorite quotes from Churchill is success is not final, failure is not fatal. It is the courage to continue that counts. And, you know, that is where it's at. I just think many individuals face setbacks, and I think obstacles are those frightful things we see when we take our eyes off our goals.
00:18:04:22 - 00:18:26:01
Speaker 2
I think you have to keep your eyes on the prize. I think the goal has to be more powerful to you than the obstacle. I think the the pain of missing that goal has to be more painful than the pain of the discipline to go on, achieve it, you know, extraordinary success requires extraordinary sacrifices. And so these are all words.
00:18:26:01 - 00:18:54:00
Speaker 2
I mean, I don't want to sound like the old fogy who's get off my lawn, but, you know, these are words that still are applied today. Sacrifice. You know, goals, you know, keeping your eyes on that stuff. It's it's still important. Discipline. Still important. So I'd say if somebody had a setback and someone has a challenge, which would be any human being to go back and focus on your goals, why you want to achieve that goals and what you're willing to pay to reach it.
00:18:54:02 - 00:19:08:20
Speaker 1
Actually, a goal setting is a fundamental aspect of personal and professional growth. What strategies do you recommend for setting ambitious yet achievable goals, and how can individuals stay committed to their goals long term?
00:19:08:20 - 00:19:29:19
Speaker 2
Great. Well, and I'll, permit me a little, self-indulgence here. Zig Ziglar, as we both know, when I went to see zig a week before he passed away, and he said to me, the one thing, one regret I have in my career, Brian, he said, I talk to people about goals for 40 years, but I never had them set them when I were with me.
00:19:29:19 - 00:19:48:14
Speaker 2
And he goes, every time I spoke with one of your events, you always took time out to have people set their goals. So I've had 3 million people in an environment where I've stopped the seminar, give them the outline of what to how to write goals, play these soft, classical, baroque style music to relax the brain and have them write goals.
00:19:48:14 - 00:20:07:06
Speaker 2
And so to me there's two goals. And so I've done this for almost 30 years. And what I would say is the two types of goals that really work. One is a be high goal, be a big Harry audacious goal like out of the box crazy. What would you do if you couldn't fail? You've no idea. How are you going to do it?
00:20:07:06 - 00:20:24:02
Speaker 2
How are you going to pay for it? But a big hairy, audacious goal. And then the next is breaking it down into smaller chunks, which is ten days, ten months and five years and ten days is a is a list of things. And I would say this if you can't do the list for ten days, then you sure as heck aren't going to do the ten months.
00:20:24:04 - 00:20:39:15
Speaker 2
And if you can't do the ten months, you certainly won't persevere to the five years. So I'd say a big, hairy, audacious goal. And for you, it was to change the whole real estate business, right? You want to change the whole real estate business? And you did. And the whole industry has never been the same since. and it's better for us.
00:20:39:17 - 00:20:49:09
Speaker 2
So that's one of those big hairy, audacious goals. And then it gets down to the practical, okay, what am I doing for the next ten days? What am I doing for the next ten months? And what's a five year plan look like?
00:20:49:11 - 00:20:56:16
Speaker 1
Cool. Are there specific techniques or practices you use to inspire and motivate others?
00:20:56:18 - 00:21:31:02
Speaker 2
For sure. for sure. I think there's two very powerful motivators for human beings, and I do it through story. And, you've seen me do this many times where I will share stories like so when I've spoken for your company, I'll share stories of Remax people that people can see themselves in us. And the two reasons for it is the, the, the internal motivation that you can trigger for a human being are they get exposed to someone who's overcome, who's achieved and done well, and they go, if they can do it, I can do it.
00:21:31:04 - 00:21:54:14
Speaker 2
And then the second response that often happens is you remind people of things they've overcome in the past and they go, I did it before, I can do it again. And I think those are the two triggers that we try to create in coaching to get people to, to, to take action. So like, for example, ice, I spoke at the Remax convention this year and I showed a lady named Joanne Zebrowski.
00:21:54:16 - 00:22:18:02
Speaker 2
So her husband leaves her. She's got two young adopted kids. She goes a quarter million dollars in credit cards, and she goes from that to being one of the top teams in the world, making a million and a half dollars a year. And and she tells this great story. She talks about her kids and her family. And I did a meet and greet at the conference afterwards, and every single person walked up to me and just said, I was so inspired by that.
00:22:18:04 - 00:22:32:16
Speaker 2
And I go, well, what was it in Spurgeon's? What if she could start there and end up there where she did? Maybe I can too. And then some of the folks who were older and the truth had been a bit a little beat up. I'd ask them about, well, tell me something you achieved in the past. And I go, well, if you did it before, you can do it again.
00:22:32:19 - 00:22:40:02
Speaker 2
And I just think those two things, if people are listening today, those are two big triggers that really can get people going. You know.
00:22:40:04 - 00:23:05:06
Speaker 1
I agree, you know, in a lot of my speaking with Remax, we've been through seven recessions. Maybe this is the eighth, right. and it's as bad as the oil embargoes or the 17% mortgage rates or the great financial disaster of oh seven. Yeah. But, I always remind them about those things, and I try to tell them that we survived each one of those.
00:23:05:06 - 00:23:29:21
Speaker 1
Right. I used to tell them we survived it because of the quality of our agents. I've changed my mind about that. I think Darwin has been, as somebody has claimed, said the strongest of the species survives. He never said that. He said he said that the most resilient and the most adaptable of the species survives.
00:23:29:23 - 00:23:36:15
Speaker 1
The dinosaurs were here 100 million years ago. It was the strongest ever. they're gone. The mosquito is still here.
00:23:36:17 - 00:23:37:19
Speaker 2
Yeah.
00:23:37:21 - 00:23:41:02
Speaker 1
And so adaptability to your circumstances.
00:23:41:05 - 00:23:42:18
Speaker 2
Yeah. For sure.
00:23:42:20 - 00:23:55:21
Speaker 1
That's good. You know, ambitious individuals often strive for continuous improvement. How can individuals maintain the growth mindset to continue to challenge themselves to reach new levels.
00:23:55:23 - 00:24:18:22
Speaker 2
Yeah. So I think again you need that goal. That's the North Star you know. I don't know you know this but I as a as a kid growing up in Ireland, I just became fixated with the American space program. And I just was such an odd, audacious thing that Americans could put a man on the moon. And of course, you know, in on the west of Ireland, you know, everyone would have a picture of the Madonna and Child and JFK.
00:24:18:23 - 00:24:39:18
Speaker 2
You know, that was the west of Ireland, right? Of course. And and so here's a guy we're going to put a man on the moon, bring him safely to Earth by the end of the decade. And that led me to, I mean, every major astronaut you can name, including Neil Armstrong, we had at our conferences and Buzz Aldrin and, I'm trying to think of the last guy on the moon, a Gene Cernan, who flew our plane, by the way, which was a great trick.
00:24:39:20 - 00:24:56:15
Speaker 2
But one of the things they talked about was that their goal was in front of them every night. You know, they when they they got that speech every night, they went out and they looked up. The goal was there. It was it was in front. And like they knew what they were trying to achieve. And then how does it correlate back to what they're doing today?
00:24:56:17 - 00:25:15:18
Speaker 2
So we created a formula about 25 years ago. In fact, Nike picked it up and became one of their slogans that was called Win the Day. So we figured because people are people get there. What they do is they get they deal in absolutes. Or if I want to be successful, I got to be. I got a lead generate eight hours a day.
00:25:15:20 - 00:25:41:19
Speaker 2
Ridiculous. Nobody generates leads eight hours a day. I got to sell eight hours a day. Ridiculous. Nobody does that. So we would say, listen, there's 24 hours in a day. If you can generate leads for two hours in a day, you just won the day. And then in the week, there's seven weeks, seven days in a week, if you can do it, four days out of seven, you won the week and there's 4.3 weeks in a month.
00:25:41:19 - 00:26:04:16
Speaker 2
If you could do it three weeks out of the month, you win the week and then, if you could do that for 30 weeks out of the year, you win the year. So when the day when the week win the year, eventually what happens is, you know, people compile massive success stories. They've increased their production tenfold in three years by having the big goal.
00:26:04:16 - 00:26:27:03
Speaker 2
I'm chasing the moon. And then how do I win the day? How do I win the week? How do I win the month? How do I win the year? And I think that is really if people are ambitious, that's what it takes. And it doesn't take some outer body thing. You know, when a football coach, Dave says, I need 110%, it's the worst motivational speech in the world because it means I need more than you're capable of.
00:26:27:05 - 00:26:46:15
Speaker 2
And so many people believe, like you and I both know we're kind of ordinary fellas. You know, we've achieved big things and big fortunes and all this stuff. We're kind of ordinary fellows now. We have a couple of things in common. We're ambitious, we're gritty. But the last thing, and the thing that I've always found that we were kindred spirits on, we're lifelong learners.
00:26:46:17 - 00:27:08:07
Speaker 2
And we were willing to grow and willing to learn. that's why, you know, I was tickled pink. You wrote this book, the perfect ten. Because, you know, and I also think it's important to learn from someone who has a little snow on the roof. Who's been there, done that. You know, there's. We live in a world today where someone's on The Apprentice on Tuesday and their biography comes out on Thursday, and they're 26.
00:27:08:09 - 00:27:24:01
Speaker 2
And it's not that there's no value in it, but for those of us who've been there, done that, like you say, it's been through seven, possibly eight major downturns in America because you're in a position to speak. And so I just think, you know, those kinds of things we're talking about, you know, winning the day one in the year, keep your eye on the prize.
00:27:24:01 - 00:27:41:15
Speaker 2
But the grit, the ambition and then the village, the desire to grow. You know, you and I both know we've shared books, we've shared examples, we share quotes with one another. It's also what made our presentations fresh as we traveled around. But I think that's that's that's the key to success for people listening.
00:27:41:17 - 00:27:45:19
Speaker 1
You know, I also think one other key is who you surround yourself.
00:27:45:19 - 00:27:46:19
Speaker 2
With, right?
00:27:46:21 - 00:27:54:06
Speaker 1
And, I think it was, Jim Rohn that said, you'll be the average of the five people you spend the most time with.
00:27:54:08 - 00:27:54:16
Speaker 2
Right.
00:27:54:19 - 00:28:08:03
Speaker 1
And I have thought about that for 30 years. Yeah. And there's no doubt in my mind that, if you associate with other ambitious and, gritty people, you will pick up their habits.
00:28:08:05 - 00:28:25:17
Speaker 2
Well, truth be told, I mean, I, I quote you all the time. I mean, I know you're quoting somebody else, but it was like you always said, one log makes a lousy fire. And, you know, in our relationship, right. On more than one occasion, I flew out to Denver to go spend a day with you and go, okay, Dave, I need to pick your brain.
00:28:25:19 - 00:28:42:02
Speaker 2
And, you know, it's interesting. And I'm in this spot now where I'm kind of in the I'm. I'm probably that age now that you were to me when we first started doing this. And I have the same thing and I have people come to me all day long looking for me to invest in this or give them money for the house and whatever else.
00:28:42:04 - 00:29:01:15
Speaker 2
And I think to myself, Jeepers, if they ask me for the information, it'd be worth so much more than the money they want. You know what I mean? Like, they they need a couple of million dollars in investment. I could give you a couple million dollars and advice, but they don't ask for it, you know? And so, you know, I just think, like I say, who you spend your time with, surround yourself with those top people.
00:29:01:15 - 00:29:03:11
Speaker 2
You become a top person.
00:29:03:13 - 00:29:23:22
Speaker 1
So I know you as a human being, not just as a business person. and pursuing ambitious goals can sometimes lead to burnout, neglect of personal well-being. You know, how do you recommend a vigil strike a balance between ambition and maintaining their overall health, happiness, and personal relationships?
00:29:24:01 - 00:29:48:02
Speaker 2
All right, that's a trick question, because you and I have had many conversations about balance over the years. So, and you and I both agree on something that is balance is not achievable. That's what it's. But so what I've come to because I'm a father first, husband second, the business was a distant third to me. Always. so what I believe is balancing.
00:29:48:04 - 00:30:07:10
Speaker 2
And the best way I could describe it is it's like, you know, they have these exercise balls called bosu balls. They're kind of like a third of a ball with a firm base. And you have to stand on it. Yes. And you do actually. And you're constantly having to do these little, little changes in your posture and so on, so forth to stay upright.
00:30:07:12 - 00:30:27:14
Speaker 2
So what I think is people are looking for balance. They're looking for a destination. I've arrived. I've arrived. The only way I knew I was doing too much was when I did too much. The only way I knew how much I was driven too far was when I burnt out. And then when I did it, I tried to learn from it and.
00:30:27:14 - 00:30:49:14
Speaker 2
And I've burnt out many times in my career because I'm a very ambitious guy. And so the truth of the matter is then it became, okay, what adjustments because I make. So for me, for example, I have I was preparing today to come and meet you on this show, but I got up early. I did me 45 minutes on the elliptical machine.
00:30:49:16 - 00:31:06:19
Speaker 2
You know, I had my oatmeal and fruit. I did a bit of reading and I did a bit of journaling point because I know when I do those four things, I can at least have I have a semblance of stability in the day. Now. Yesterday I had board meetings and this and that. The other day went on to 9:00 at night.
00:31:07:01 - 00:31:25:13
Speaker 2
That's not a balanced day. Okay, to work, I'm balancing. And so I'm not going to do it again tomorrow. So the point is I have a few routines that I do that I've learned that really help me physically and mentally. But I really believe this. You have to find that your own capacity. That's another big word, Dave.
00:31:25:13 - 00:31:58:18
Speaker 2
I'd say almost as big as ambition and grit. What's a person's capacity? And, so I found that I have limited capacity for certain things and abundance of capacity for other things. So finding out what that capacity is, you know, you'll have me here who's, Colonel Sanders. Right? So 60 some years of age, when he started his business in the chicken business and, he he had a great phrase, and he said, a man will rust out long before he wears out.
00:31:58:20 - 00:32:13:22
Speaker 2
And I think in the culture we live today, most people are afraid to test their limits. They're afraid. Oh, I should never burnout. Burnout? It's a disaster. No it's not. That just means I went to the red line on the car. Okay? I'm not going to drive the car on a red line. I'm going to bring it back down.
00:32:14:00 - 00:32:29:12
Speaker 2
I got to change gears, but most people are too afraid of it. And so for me, yeah, I've burnt out many times. and then I learn from it. And then what do I do? And what am I practices and how do I do it? And here's the thing. Not perfect. Not still not perfect. But you know what?
00:32:29:14 - 00:32:53:20
Speaker 2
I can tell you, I came here as an immigrant with nothing. I built a big fortune. I have a 36 year relationship with my wife, who's my best friend. I've got six great kids. I got three great three grandkids, and I got a full life, and things are good. So, for a guy who burnt out quite a bit, I learned enough to live this balancing life.
00:32:53:22 - 00:33:12:15
Speaker 2
But I still have the balance. There's no destination for us. There's no destination because your life keeps changing. So, I know you and I have talked about that many times. about us. And I just think tell people, you know, encourage people to test themselves. How far can you go and then learn from that, and that becomes the barrier.
00:33:12:17 - 00:33:38:18
Speaker 1
No, no doubt about it. Well, Brian, it's been a delight. You're a marvelous individual, a very good friend. And, I admire you so greatly. can't tell you how much I appreciate you being with us. Everybody that's out there, you can go to, Amazon or wherever you want. if you want to talk about ambition and grit, he tells all about it in the immigrant edge.
00:33:38:20 - 00:33:52:08
Speaker 1
if you're in sales and you want to work by referrals as, as bestseller, it was, work by referral. And it's one of the best books written in the sales industry. So thank you very much for joining us.
00:33:52:09 - 00:34:08:15
Speaker 2
Thank you. Dave, I appreciate you so much. You're one of my heroes and, one of my mentors and, you're a you're a man well worth listening. There's a lot of people these days have a lot to say with, not much behind us. I'm so excited for the perfect ten. Just got my copy by the way.
00:34:08:17 - 00:34:14:11
Speaker 2
And, I've started. I'm about halfway through. And, ten fabulous principles, so appreciate it.
00:34:14:13 - 00:34:16:07
Speaker 1
Excellent. Thank you very much.