Eagle Community Church of Christ

This week we talk about the common lie: "God just wants me to be happy." What does scripture say about your happiness? John Gunter discusses the differences in happiness and godly joy.

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What is Eagle Community Church of Christ?

Teaching podcast from the Eagle Community Church of Christ in Mont Belvieu, TX.

John Gunter:

Hey everyone. This is John Guenther with Eagle Community Church of of Christ. Thanks for listening to our podcast. This week we are talking about the book 9 Common Lies Christians Believe. This is week 3 and we're talking about the lie, that says God just wants me to be happy.

John Gunter:

And that's the idea that no matter what God just wants me to be happy. Even if that means I have to break what God has said. God just wants me to be happy. So of course that's a lie. We'll talk about it this week.

John Gunter:

Hopefully, it's helpful to you. Come see us sometime. But, again, we we thank you for being here. We have been going through a study based on this book by Shane Pruitt called 9 Common Lies Christians Believe. And, I've really enjoyed it so far.

John Gunter:

I think, a number of you have as well. And just to rehash, if you are new to this, the first time you are seeing this slide, we are going to talk about the first, first two. Lie number 1, God won't give me more than I can handle. We've probably all heard that. Some of us have said it.

John Gunter:

That is not a promise in the Bible, that God will give you more than you can handle. The world often gives us more than we can ever handle. The promise from God is that He won't ever give us more than we can handle through Him. We have to rely on him. Often we say this and it's like we just need to tighten our belts and get to work.

John Gunter:

Well, that's not it. It is relying on God to help us get through. And some of those, I know some of your stories where you have gotten through times like that, and don't know how, and well, the reason, the how, is God, isn't it? Lie number 2 that we talked about last week was, when someone passes, that's often an awkward time. We know we want to be there for people, we want to give them strength and encouragement, just be there for them, but sometimes people say some interesting things, like God gained another angel, as if that would help you.

John Gunter:

You've seen on TV, every time a bell rings, what? Angel gets his wings, right? And so we've got popular culture kind of influencing us on, really what scripture says or does not say. Scripture never says that we will turn into angels. Angels are angels.

John Gunter:

Humans are humans. And God sent His one and only Son to die for humans. He sent His Son down in human form to be with us, to experience life on Earth with all of us. And that's one of those lies. And lie number 3 that we are talking about today, God just wants me to be happy.

John Gunter:

How many of you have heard this one before? Yes. Have you ever said it before? Don't raise your hand. For some reason that has gotten into our understanding of God, and it's an interesting one.

John Gunter:

God just wants it just sounds like something God would want. Right? God wants my happiness. He sent his son to die for me, surely he wants me to be happy. Right?

John Gunter:

And so that's one of those lies that we come up with, and we are not going to talk about that, we are not just going to leave you hanging. But in the book, Shane Pruitt, who is the author, and his wife, Casey, they talk about this couple that they know and were good friends with. They got married very early. I think he was 22, and she was like 18. And so she became married at 18, and I think a mother at 20.

John Gunter:

And so that's that's pretty early. But 4 years into their marriage, all of a sudden out of the blue without communicating anything prior to this, she decided she wasn't happy, and they call it the 4 year glitch. All of a sudden, it went from everything is going well to nothing is going right, And what she said in this moment is that she never really got to sow her wild oats. You ever heard that said before? You know exactly what she is talking about.

John Gunter:

She said, I've never got to party as a single girl. I never got to go dancing. Dated another boy to see what all is out there, right in the middle of a marriage with a little baby. All of a sudden, I'm not happy. And I think you have regretted things before, haven't you?

John Gunter:

I think we can all kind of relate to that, but the problem is the husband was devastated because this was news to him. This is not something they had talked about all of a sudden. Like I said, one day, all of a sudden she has decided that, well, I'm not happy anymore. We say things like, the grass is greener. You ever been driving on the road and see a large cow with her head outside the fence, eating the grass on the other side.

John Gunter:

Now, any good farmer has, put down stuff for fertilizer, they've probably put things down for thistles and stuff to make the grass inside the fence as good as it possibly can be, and yet here is this mama cow with her whole head sticking out of the fence, eating that grass. And we understand what that means, don't we? The grass is always greener. Have you ever been in a situation where you thought the grass was greener, and then you got over there and you thought, oh, no. It's not.

John Gunter:

Buddy of mine, he worked at a at a place, and he was gonna work at a similar place, but he had to drive. And so it was like a 35 minute drive, and I said, hey, are you sure this is where you want to be? He said, absolutely, we've had some more people go over there, and he said, it's going to be great. 2 weeks in, he knew he had made a fatal mistake. Because though we think the grass is always greener, it is not.

John Gunter:

And often, things like this, these regrets that she had, I never got to party as a single girl. We know where those things can lead, don't we? A lot of times those things are not leading us closer to God. Shane said he and his wife, Casey, tried everything. They tried reminding her, Hey, think of your family, think of your baby, think of your relationship to God.

John Gunter:

Like, why are you so consumed with this that you're forgetting all of this? You would give up your family, this relationship with your baby and family there, and your relationship with God. And so they kept working, kept working. Shane said, I continue to have hope. I continue to think this can work out until one night, Casey comes home and she says, it is over, she's gonna leave him.

John Gunter:

I thought there was still a chance. She said, I know I knew it was over because she has just told me I know that God just wants me to be happy. And because she was not happy in that moment, she was not happy anymore. The statement that is always the excuse people give for ignoring what Scriptures have to say about their particular breach of ethics, God just wants me to be happy. That is exactly what that is.

John Gunter:

That is nothing else. That is not a promise from God that He just wants you to be happy no matter what that entails. This is often what people say when they have decided they want to kind of ignore scripture and cling on to this idea that they have of God, that He just wants me to be happy. Can you imagine a God that just wants you to be happy so much that He is okay with you leaving your spouse and your little baby? That's not the God I read about in scripture, and that's not the God that exists.

John Gunter:

So, is it God's priority for us to just be happy? Is that our priority? Is that His priority for our lives? Where do you read that if you're thinking, yeah, God just wants me to be happy? Is that His priority?

John Gunter:

The world's idea of happiness. The world's idea of happiness is directly tied to circumstances. If our circumstances are favorable, then we are happy. If not, then we are not. And so, that is what happiness is.

John Gunter:

Happiness is a feeling that I feel when my circumstances allow me to feel that. So you remember the last time you were happy about something? Happiness is very fleeting. You might experience happiness when you buy something. You ever done that?

John Gunter:

Come on. Yeah. We exist in a consumer world, don't we? Bought something. I thought, man, I just need this to be happy.

John Gunter:

I've got my eyes set on a pellet smoker that y'all wouldn't even believe. And I'd be embarrassed to tell you how much it costs, but man, I would be happy if I had it. I'll just tell you right now. Now I could cook for an army, there's only 4 of us, but I could cook for an army. I would be happy if I could get that, but again, that's for our circumstance.

John Gunter:

For the moment, I'm happy because, well, this worked out. But that is not what we are promised. The thing is our pursuit of the feeling of happiness much, if I get this, then I will be happy. We can be so focused on that that we can lose God in the process. And one thing about this church right now, that we can be so consumed on a building, on a new place to worship, that we can miss what God is doing in the process.

John Gunter:

Do you understand that? We can be so fixated, so consumed with one thing that we miss what God is doing in the moment. The thing is, what is a better option? The better option is joy. Now joy is something we receive from God.

John Gunter:

You remember back in December when we went through our Advent series, we talked about joy. Joy is something different from happiness. Joy is, again, contentment from trusting God. That is not based in my circumstances. You ever, you ever had a bad day at work?

John Gunter:

Am I the only one that's ever done that? You had a bad day at work? You had the worst day at work, you had a bad conversation, or a bad interview, or a bad whatever, your boss is on you. You ever walked into your house and seen the people you love, and all of a sudden it's okay again? You were there in that moment.

John Gunter:

That is kind of what joy is compared to happiness. Now, happiness, you are not happy because the day has not worked out, right? But joy comes from knowing, okay, I have something here that's much bigger than that. And that's kind of the idea I have of joy when thinking of God. Again, joy is contentment from trusting God.

John Gunter:

No matter what happens during the day, during the week, during the year, I trust in God. Now, those things may not have worked out the way I hoped they would, or thought they might, but I trust in God, and I know He cares for me, and He's going to take care of me. In the Old Testament there are 88 mentions of the word joy, in the New Testament 57. That's different from happiness. In Galatians 522-25, but the fruit of the spirit is love, and what, church?

John Gunter:

Joy, peace, forbearance, or patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control against the against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. Did you see the fruit of the Spirit as happiness up there anywhere? Because it's different.

John Gunter:

Joy is different. Joy is having God at our center, trusting in Him, and when everything is chaotic and going crazy, we can still have joy because we trust in God. One other thing we can do to, again, experience joy is to really dwell on the promises that God has given us. There are promises all throughout scripture. All throughout Scripture, that we should be able to hang on to.

John Gunter:

Have you ever been in a situation where you thought, Man, I need to get in the Word, I am down, maybe you've lost someone, I need to be refreshed. There are so many things in scripture that remind us of who God is and how much He cares about us. Here's one, from Matthew 2820, And surely I am with you always to the very end of the age. Now, He told this to His disciples, but this is a promise to all of us as well. Have you ever felt alone out here?

John Gunter:

That is a terrible feeling that I'm going alone at this. But Jesus promises that I am with you to the very end of the age, and here in Hebrews 13:5, keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have because God has said, never will I leave you, never will I forsake you. This is kinda speaking into this. Anybody like a little more money right now? Amen?

John Gunter:

Yeah. It might be helpful in some ways. Right? Your money may not buy happiness, but I'd sure like to try, right? That's kind of what we think.

John Gunter:

And it says right there, keep your lives free from the love of money. You're so focused and worried about that, but the promise is never will I leave you, never will I forsake you. That is the promise. That's where we get our joy, Not thinking and and twisting scriptures thinking, what God wants for me is happiness and money and a bigger house and a better car. Because I liked my car 2 years ago when I bought it, but now it's trash, right?

John Gunter:

You all know that. It's a 2 year old car. They've already priced me out of new cars anyway. I'm done with that. But God's promise is, Never will I leave you, never will I forsake you.

John Gunter:

That is what we focus on. Joy is not built okay, I can't spell this morning. Joy is not built on outward circumstances, but on Christ dwelling inside believers. Let me say that one more time. Joy is not built on outward circumstances, but on Christ dwelling inside believers.

John Gunter:

Those of you who have been baptized have received the gift of the Holy Spirit, the gift that Jesus said was even better than him being there in person. As his disciples were worried about him leaving and going away from them, he said, it is better that I leave and the spirit come to live inside of you. Because joy, again, is not outward circumstances, it is that I have Jesus living in me. And sometimes, we don't live like that, do we? Even in church, we walk around with a sour face on, trying to tell people about the love of God when we are the most miserable people out here.

John Gunter:

And that's sad. I hope that's not us. I hope we are finding joy with Jesus living inside of us. But what joy is not? Joy is not always laughing, smiling, and being silly.

John Gunter:

I think you might be a psychopath, if that's what you're doing all the time, I don't know, sociopath, something. It also isn't just having upbeat feeling or the power of positive thinking. This is not, again, looking at your circumstances and go, everything's terrible. That's great. But it is focusing on, again, the promises of god.

John Gunter:

That I have god, I have the holy spirit living within me. And I don't know about you church, but I need the Spirit of God living within me because I am, if it was just up to my abilities, I wouldn't get very far. I need the Holy Spirit within me, guiding me, shutting my mouth at times. Amen? Uh-huh.

John Gunter:

Have you ever had a Holy Spirit filter kick in all of a sudden? You go, Oh, okay. I needed that. That's a good thing. I was about to say something I shouldn't have said.

John Gunter:

But Jesus didn't have all good days, did He? If you read about Jesus' ministry, it is something most of us would not sign up for, isn't it? Even you remember when when the man runs up to Jesus, he said, teacher, I will follow you wherever you go. And he said, hold up just a second. Birds have nests, foxes have holes, but the son of man does not have a place to lay his head.

John Gunter:

I'm homeless. I don't have a bed to sleep in. Are you sure you wanna sign up for that? That that's the ministry Jesus went into. Do you did you ever see Jesus saying, well, God just wants me to be happy.

John Gunter:

I'm out here living living the good life. Yeah. Come on. He has blessed me financially, let me just dish out some money to you. That's not the promise of God.

John Gunter:

The promise of God is again that I will be there with you, I will not forsake you. From John 15:11, I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. Jesus has this desire, again, for our joy to be complete. Again, that is not happiness. That is not dependent on only circumstances.

John Gunter:

That is a joy that comes only from God. Christians should have joy and not the constant pursuit of the feeling of happiness because you will never catch that. You will catch it for a second, and then it's gone. You've experienced that, haven't you? We you ever experienced that?

John Gunter:

Raise your hand if you've ever experienced buyer's remorse. I need my son to see this. Just a second. Yeah. Evan's actually good.

John Gunter:

Logan is the the spender, but he's also the giver. Like, he's not going to have a dime when he's older, because he's spent it or he's given it away. He's good with either one, as long as it's not burning a hole in his pocket. You give it, spend it. Evan is actually the better one, but we've all experienced that, right?

John Gunter:

In the moment, it feels like the right thing to do, the thing that's going to make me happy, the thing that's going to complete me, fill that hole, that void, whatever the feeling is. Then whatever magic happens the next day after we sleep, I think there is something to that whole sleeping on it deal. We wake up the next day and we immediately know that was a horrible decision. Now, why couldn't I have had that feeling yesterday? I think the thing is, we get caught up in our emotions and we get caught up seeking this feeling of happiness, not understanding what true joy is.

John Gunter:

The Christian should have joy and not pursuing this feeling of happiness. From Philippians 4:4, rejoice in the Lord always, and I will say it again, rejoice. Rejoice when, church? Always. Again, that's not a forced happy feelings when things aren't going well.

John Gunter:

What that is, is that feeling of coming home after that bad day at work and knowing everything is okay because I have got my family. This is bigger than that even. Maybe this is my family is not working out. I have God though. And I can have joy because what God has done for me, how He has cared for me.

John Gunter:

And one final reminder from John 3:16, For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. That is something worth having joy about, church. That God loves you and he cares for you, that he sent his Son to die for you, he's even given his Spirit to live inside of you. He desires you to experience joy. But don't be out here in the world chasing happiness all the time because you'll never find it.

John Gunter:

The grass will always be greener somewhere else, and you'll leave a trail of wreckage in your life, pursuing happiness. If you've ever done it, you know exactly what I'm talking about. The friends of, Shane and Casey did split up. And that's a sad story. To be so fixated on what I think I might have missed out on or what may be better than what I have now, Again, leaves that trail of record.

John Gunter:

This morning, what we wanna do is we wanna challenge you to not focus on this feeling of happiness, but to focus on the true joy that comes from being content with God. Trusting in Him, trusting in His promises. It's actual promises, not the lies that we often believe in. And so we've got a, invitation song picked out, Mikey does. So we'd love to pray with you.

John Gunter:

We'd love to encourage you if if, today is a good day for that. We'd also, if you haven't started that walk with him and you'd like to be baptized, we'd love to do that, this morning. Would you come as we stand and as we sing?