People Being Other People - DnD Actual Play

We dine with the finest folk in all of Smallcastle. Not really -- the Gentahlia family show their true colors over dinner while we plumb them for information about Maisie.
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What is People Being Other People - DnD Actual Play?

We are PBOP - a TTRPG actual-play podcast where we pretend to be other People! Join us for, hilarious improv, immersive storytelling, and an original score to set the mood. Subscribe now and adventure along with us - for excitement, for love, and for giggles!

Tim / GM:

Last time on Cloudfall. The road to the miniaturized city of Tiny Castle was darkened by the appearance of a shadow rat and a little bit of paperwork, but they made it to the kingdom in 1 piece or rather 5 tiny pieces. The people of tiny castle seem to have it all. With everyone shrunk down so small, resources are abundant and everyone lives lives in easy luxury. Of course, none more luxurious than the Gentaglia family, the latest ruling royalty in the entire Skyland.

Tim / GM:

The party's attempts to get to the witch, Maisie Muldrifft, haven't gotten them far as the royal family seems to dodge their questions in favor of their own family drama. And now the party finds themselves at the heart of it. Princess Overia seems head over heels obsessed with the kingdom's highest ranking knight, sir Vix. Now finally sat in the dining hall, the party, the royal family, sir Vix, and Diabolo have all just seated themselves for dinner. Bon appetit.

Tim / GM:

You're all seated in the banquet hall. This massive continuous table is equipped to seat 200. But tonight, it's just 12. And you're all crowded around the king seated at the head of the table. On one side of the table, starting from the king on the left side, we have Queen Clathora.

Tim / GM:

Sitting next to her, Guy and then Princess Oveira, and Poppy, Eren, and finally, Machiavelli Diabolo at the end of the row. On the other side of the table, we have from the king, Prince Volvan, sir Vix, Jurney, Doran, and young Fallip. The moment you all sit down, a delightful crowd of wait staff all enter the room momentarily and just kind of crowd the whole space in a little rush of noise. They all set down elaborate drinks and cocktails in cups that are carved from solid gemstones. Duranisi set before you is a cup that is made out of emeralds purely, just carved from emerald.

Tim / GM:

At this size, it's really no issue to, to make such fantastical things. The commotion of it all causes that giant fork above you all, this unshrunken fork that's suspended from the ceiling. It starts kind of swaying back and forth as all the waitstaff kind of charges through here with their drinks. And in a moment, they're gone, and the room is silent.

Maggie / Poppy:

Thank you for having us, your Heinz.

Tim / GM:

Think nothing about the heroes of

Tim / GM:

the clouds? King Glutius Maximus kind of launches right into it and says,

Tim / GM:

we're more than honored to have all of you with us. It's not often that we get such highbrow guests, respectable guests, honorable guests.

Thomas / Guy:

And how has news of our exploits, crossed here into small castles?

Tim / GM:

Quite by chance, my daughter, that Belveria, she's brought these crystals into our lives of wretched things, but they show us a bit of the world outside.

Tim / GM:

The queen kinda jumps in here and says,

Tim / GM:

yes. It's it's a bit,

Tim / GM:

overwhelming, but she, presses upon us all these crystals that show us visions of the outside world. Much of

Tim / GM:

it, I I can't relate to. I'm sorry. But some of it, I understand. I I know you did some wonderful things in Baxi. Is that right?

Thomas / Guy:

I too find these crystals perplexing, but,

Tim / GM:

indeed.

Thomas / Guy:

Yes. It seems they do have some worth.

Tim / GM:

Absolute poppycock.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh, poppycock. I I think they're perfectly wonderful. It's a it's a great way to share information.

Tim / GM:

Seriously? This gnome knows what it's all about. Princess Oveira.

Maggie / Poppy:

I'm a halfling.

Tim / GM:

Oh.

Maggie / Poppy:

But close enough. It's fine.

Tim / GM:

What's a halfling?

Maggie / Poppy:

They're smaller.

Tim / GM:

Smaller than a gnome?

Maggie / Poppy:

Little bit.

Tim / GM:

How small do you get? I mean, we're already in tiny castle.

Hannah / Eryn:

That's a good one. That's a good one.

Maggie / Poppy:

About this small, I guess.

Tim / GM:

Okay. And she, like, picks up her, ruby wine glass and just kind of, like, sips from it and rolls her eyes. At that moment, you all hear a bursting door swing open, and you hear the clattering of armor. You see Peter, easy p, Zeelas Lapillus, the real one, come through the front kitchen doors. He looks endlessly frustrated.

Tim / GM:

Like, he's just spent a couple of difficult hours trying to reason with some guards to get through back to the city kingdom. And he says, your highness, I've made it back, and I'm I'm here

Tim / GM:

for dinner. I'm still invited to the table, am I not?

Tim / GM:

Peter. Yes. Take a seat next to, Maxion Fallip.

Tim / GM:

Peter Lupiolis is now seated at the end of the table, the farthest away from king Gludius that he possibly can be.

Thomas / Guy:

Guy leans over to the king and says, your highness, should we allow such riffraff at the table?

Tim / GM:

I agree. He is less than effective, but he, well, you feel so far? I keep him around.

John / Doran:

Doran waves at Lapillus.

Tim / GM:

Lapillus, like, sees you and kinda, like, leans forward and waves back.

Tim / GM:

Alright. Please, tell us about your exploits. We'd love to know more about, about all of you.

John / Doran:

Do you actually

Tim / GM:

Certainly. I can tell you about my exploit. Not you, Peter.

John / Doran:

Sorry. I yeah. Shouldn't have assumed you were talking to us, but, I guess, how much do you actually wanna know?

Tim / GM:

We must know for the good of the island. You, you did significant things on Maxi to save them, did you not?

John / Doran:

Well, you know, I I'm curious about these crystals. What what did you hear that we did?

Tim / GM:

Basically, I just showed them all the, like, top shit. I mean, like, top tens, from every morning. It's like an education because they don't get out much.

John / Doran:

Right. So what happened, at Baxi?

Tim / GM:

Okay. Well, they saw the battle in the gardens I mean, like, a couple different angles. Doran, we're pretty sure you shit your pants at some point during that fight.

Thomas / Guy:

That did happen. Yes.

Tim / GM:

People have been doing analysis of the clips, and it looks pretty convincing.

John / Doran:

Don't don't believe everything you see.

Tim / GM:

We have a remaining question after all of this. However, what was causing all of it?

Tim / GM:

The, the sinking of the island, the, the demise of back sea.

John / Doran:

Well, I think you know a bit about some of it. I mean, clearly, it's happening here too. And then Doran lets that sit in the air and starts chopping up some food.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. Good move, Doran. You see them, the queen, the king, and the prince, all kind of meet eyes on that. They're aware of what's happening here. The other shadow rats and what that might imply.

Tim / GM:

Yes. It's it's true. We've had our share of

Tim / GM:

troubles lately, related to the Bismite. Is that, something you've perhaps come to resolve? Well,

John / Doran:

you know, it's, always a long shot for this to actually work out. So, you know, it it's important to utilize all resources available. I've heard strange things about this royal family and its relationship with the witch.

Tim / GM:

Bao? What rumors? What have you heard?

John / Doran:

Not much other than, seems you're not on the best of terms, or at least there's not necessarily a you know, these are just rumors after all, but it seems you're not exactly seeing eye to eye on how to handle things.

Tim / GM:

Dear boy, it seems you've been away from the mainland a bit too long.

Tim / GM:

I think you've forgotten a little

Tim / GM:

bit of decorum. It's, much too early in our dinner conversation to be talking of such heavy things, don't you think?

John / Doran:

It's dire times. I mean, we don't know how much longer we have, but

Tim / GM:

even in dire times, you mustn't forget yourself, dear boy.

Maggie / Poppy:

I'm, like, making, like, stop talking eyes at Doran, who's directly across from me.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. Okay.

John / Doran:

Oh, you want the butter?

Maggie / Poppy:

Yes. Thank you.

Tim / GM:

Okay.

Maggie / Poppy:

The sputters is great.

Hannah / Eryn:

That's the episode title. It's Butters.

Tim / GM:

The queen looks at you

Tim / GM:

and says, aren't you sweet?

Maggie / Poppy:

I'm so glad we have face cameras on because of the face that I made out of. Sorry.

Tim / GM:

In that same moment, sir Vicks, speaks up at the front of the table there

Tim / GM:

and he says, Bavaria, we were worried about you.

Tim / GM:

Pity there are so few

Tim / GM:

the family can trust these days. Had I

Tim / GM:

not been preoccupied, I would have been on the search for you myself.

Tara / Journey:

I I thought you said you didn't know her.

Tim / GM:

Oh, of course, I know. I I, I've worked for the family a great portion of my life. I know of her.

Tara / Journey:

I'm gonna look right at princess Ovaeriya and say, Cervix said he didn't know you and that he doesn't spend any time with you.

Tim / GM:

You see ovarian's tongue kind of moving into her mouth and she goes, okay.

Maggie / Poppy:

I don't understand.

Hannah / Eryn:

Erin's eyes are just really big. Yeah. And, like, they're shaking their head back and forth like, oh, this is awkward.

Tim / GM:

Servix looks at her very end and says,

Tim / GM:

you must be more discerning with your outings, young lady.

Tim / GM:

Ovaery goes, I'm royalty. I'm nothing if not discerning.

Maggie / Poppy:

Wow. These, glazed carrots are delicious.

Tim / GM:

Poppy, across the table, Prince Volvyn is staring at you hungrily. Oh.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh. That's creepy.

Tim / GM:

He says, Mhmm. Puppy, is it our fate to taste yours yet this evening?

Maggie / Poppy:

Taste, taste my what?

Tim / GM:

Oh, indeed, for dessert, I expected with the, the Heroes of the Clouds, the Poppy, the star baker of

Tim / GM:

Baxi itself. Could we please?

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh, certainly. I just hadn't, hadn't prepared. Does is anyone do you have Oh,

Tim / GM:

we've got a full kitchen. It's nothing if not yours, Poppy. Please.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh, should I go start now? Are you okay

John / Doran:

with No.

Tim / GM:

No. You enjoy your dinner with us, but you must retreat and and give them your advice. Please, they need to be able to bake like you.

Hannah / Eryn:

Prince Volvan, I think Poppy could always use an extra hand, when baking in the kitchen if you wanted to learn a little bit.

Maggie / Poppy:

Ugh. I'm, like, elbowing Aaron in the side. Stop it.

Hannah / Eryn:

And Erin just puts a hand and, like, holds Poppy's little arm down. She really, likes having helpers, especially people with the first name Prince.

Tim / GM:

Sorry to disappoint you, puppy. I'm quite a dunce and a fool when it comes to the kitchen.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh, that's okay. I usually have Mikey helping, so

Tim / GM:

No. It it doesn't mean that we can't, paint each other with flour and enjoy our time together.

Maggie / Poppy:

Aww. How sweet. What in the world?

Tim / GM:

O'Varyo's kind of, like, staring at that interaction and is, staring at Sir Vicks at the same time. Aaron. From across the table, you can see Sir Vicks kind of staring at Overia the entire time. And Guy, at the exact same time, you hear Overia say, I think I'm an excellent judge of who should be paid attention to. And, Guy, you feel a hand on your thigh.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh, I know.

Thomas / Guy:

Guy kinda clatters his plate and utensils and as he like Oh. Bumps his legs against the bottom of the table.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. She, kind of rolls her eyes and pulls it away, but you see her, like, smirk up at you as if that almost engaged her more.

Thomas / Guy:

I think what Aaron was trying to get at is that we all might be of some help in certain parts around the kingdom, of course. Poppy, perhaps you can teach the kitchen staff, and, I do believe I might be some help in the barracks as well when you need help defending yourselves from these shadow rats, especially when you have to resort to hiring such hands as Peter over there for help.

Tim / GM:

Did somebody say my name? Peter Peter Lapidus. Everyone's been calling me EZ P, and I don't know why.

Thomas / Guy:

Quiet EZ AZP. Sorry.

Tim / GM:

Glutius kind of jumps in and he says,

Tim / GM:

enough of this baking and and frivolous nothing. You, most interesting. Tell me, what are these fairy creatures about your hair so exotic and strange?

Tara / Journey:

I mean, they are, fae creatures. They're my fae buds. They travel with me, and they've got some

Tim / GM:

But what are they exactly? They're the fairies or sprites?

Tara / Journey:

Essentially, yeah. That's basically exactly what they are, your your highness.

Tim / GM:

And where did you get them? Where did you find these things? How did you capture all of them?

Tara / Journey:

I didn't capture them. They, they just travel with me. They're they're my friends.

Tim / GM:

Darling, I I think you failed to understand

Tim / GM:

what my husband's actually getting at here is, we, we would like to have something similar, if not exactly the same. Could you perhaps name a prize?

Tara / Journey:

Oh, they're not for sale. They're individual beings with full agency and choice in where they go.

Tim / GM:

Have you seen the kind of resources that are available to us here in tiny castle?

Tara / Journey:

I mean, you can ask them if you want, if they wanna get money from you, but I don't think they really care about money.

Tim / GM:

Can they can they speak? They're sentient then. Or

Tara / Journey:

I mean, I think they speak to each other. They don't typically speak to me. But, yeah, you can talk at them if you want, but I can't make any promises. I I don't own them.

Tim / GM:

But maybe you could spare a few.

Tara / Journey:

I don't know how to say this another way. You're welcome to ask them to stay, but I can't promise that they will.

Tim / GM:

I've never met such a stubborn person before. That's impressive.

Tara / Journey:

I mean, I guess while I have your attention, speaking of shadow rats, have you or any of your people communed with the great beast that lives here?

Tim / GM:

Yeah. Such heaviness, and we haven't even had our meal yet. You need to learn a thing or 2 about the clouds.

Tara / Journey:

Yeah. That's certainly true.

Tim / GM:

Doran, young Fallip has been more and more interested prince Fallip?

John / Doran:

I am a prince Phillip?

Tim / GM:

I am a prince. Yes. Mhmm. Can I, can I help you? No.

Tim / GM:

I'm just excited waiting. For? In there k. Because there's a special meal.

John / Doran:

What makes it special? There's a

Tim / GM:

special meal because I put a surprise in it.

John / Doran:

You helped cook this meal.

Tim / GM:

I didn't cook it. K. But I put it there to be cooked. Being sat down in front of you are heaping portions of beef brisket, smoked turkey, and gallons of mashed potatoes. When you go to unravel your silverware to dig in, you see that it's not silverware at all, but gold.

Tim / GM:

As are the plates and bowls, all solid gold. Because why not? Here in tiny castle, gold is plentiful, abundant. But it's not easy for everybody. Namely Guy.

Tim / GM:

Dullahan cannot touch gold.

Tim / GM:

The

Thomas / Guy:

wow. These are such lovely arrangements, but, might I ask if there are any other, tools I can use?

Tara / Journey:

As Guy is talking, Journey looks up and sees his discomfort and picks up a slice of turkey, and starts using the piece of turkey to scoop up the mashed potatoes and eat them with her hands.

Tim / GM:

Oh, dear. Dear. I'm I'm so sorry. Perhaps,

Tim / GM:

star co captain Doran yeah. I'm so sorry. Is there something you could do about, all of this?

Hannah / Eryn:

Aaron, copies Journey, noticing what's happening and grabs a bun, a piece of bread, and just, like, folds it up and then does the same thing, like, gripping all the food with it and just, like, tastes really good.

Tim / GM:

Oh, please. That can't be

Tim / GM:

the truth. It can't be that all mainlanders eat like this.

Maggie / Poppy:

Poppy is, like, very delicately with good etiquette cutting up her food and looking around Mhmm. And just drops them on the floor Yeah. And starts shoving mashed potatoes into her face.

Tim / GM:

You see you see Prince Volvin lean forward and say, such a free spirit.

Maggie / Poppy:

This is how are you from the mainland?

Thomas / Guy:

Yes. Yes. This is right. I forgot I am from the mainland. And guy starts scooping up food with his gauntlet and eating it.

Maggie / Poppy:

It's all the rage.

Tim / GM:

You hear, oh, hell yeah. And princess Ovaerias says, like, fucking mainland rules. I'm like she's like, we have to be kind to our guests and, like, reaches out and grabs some turkey and just wraps around mashed potatoes and starts eating it.

Maggie / Poppy:

I think they call that a burrito.

Tim / GM:

Mom, they're burritos. As the last bits of food are being brought out here, the last thing that hits the table is a bread basket, and the smell of bread sends a thought racing through your head, Poppy. Where is Pinch?

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh, no.

Tim / GM:

The last time you saw Pinch, you left him with young Fallip to tide him over and distract him. When this basket is set on the table, you see subtle movement beneath the cloth that's meant to keep it all warm.

Maggie / Poppy:

I'm gonna stand up and, like, slap my hands on the table. What's that over there? And I will point to the door. Where?

Tara / Journey:

Turning looks.

Maggie / Poppy:

Is everyone looking?

Hannah / Eryn:

Aaron stares at Poppy.

Tim / GM:

Go ahead and, yeah. Give me a performance. Okay. Or deception.

Maggie / Poppy:

17. Wow. Oh my god. What's that?

Tim / GM:

Okay. Yeah. Everyone looks except prince volvin who's still looking at you.

Maggie / Poppy:

I'm going to grab the basket, toss it behind me.

Hannah / Eryn:

It just clatters into the open banquet hall behind you. Yeah.

Maggie / Poppy:

Alright. Sit down and, like, brush off my skirts.

Tim / GM:

Give me a stealth check for that.

Maggie / Poppy:

17. Wow.

Tim / GM:

Okay. Yeah. By that point, the, the royalty had followed your finger and not your intention. So they they they're none the wiser to the bread basket being thrown against the wall. You see a smattering of wheat rolls, roll across the floor, and then you see Pinch in full form, in his doughboy form.

Tim / GM:

Though he's so stiff, he can barely walk by himself now that he's been baked. You see him kind of, like, wiggling his arms and legs trying to stand up again.

Maggie / Poppy:

Aw. I'll just, like, scoop him up

Tim / GM:

Yeah. And

Maggie / Poppy:

dip him in my soup.

Hannah / Eryn:

Sure.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh, I'm so sorry. I thought I saw, a shadow spider, and then it crawled over to the table.

Tim / GM:

Yes. Wretched shadow creatures again.

Thomas / Guy:

This close to the throne room.

Maggie / Poppy:

I know. I don't know what happened. I think it was just my eyes playing tricks on me. Sorry.

Thomas / Guy:

Thank you for staying vigilant, Poppy.

Maggie / Poppy:

You're welcome. I I have to protect my friends and the royal family.

Tim / GM:

That much obliged. See? That's how you do a good duty, Lepalas.

Tim / GM:

What? Sorry, sir. I didn't hear the beginning of that. Say again.

Tim / GM:

You see Volvin again reaching towards the middle of the table and

Tim / GM:

he says, seems we're at

Tim / GM:

a loss for rolls this evening. And, he does see one roll that had fallen out of the basket. He grabs it and begins eating it. And while he's talking to you, Poppy, he's gesturing with this roll, and you can see Pinch's foot in his hand. Oh.

Tim / GM:

It's wiggling back and forth as he's chewing. I'm wait. He who is this one? Prince Volvin is eating Pinch.

Maggie / Poppy:

I I dive under the table.

John / Doran:

Okay. Good.

Maggie / Poppy:

I pop up where he is. Yep. And I slap it

Tim / GM:

up. Okay. Wow. Give me a contested grapple check.

John / Doran:

I pulled the loot and do a little.

Maggie / Poppy:

Yeah. I'm dinner at

Tim / GM:

the show.

Maggie / Poppy:

With a negative one, that is a 3.

Tim / GM:

I got a 2. 2. I like the 2. Oh.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh. I roll a 3 with a negative one.

John / Doran:

Well, I give you bardic inspiration. Bardic inspiration. It. So.

Maggie / Poppy:

Yes. 5.

Tim / GM:

There you go. That's enough. Okay. Yeah. You're able to slap it out of Alvin's hand so he got no more than a single little bite out of pinch.

Tim / GM:

It falls to the floor and he says, firecracker.

Maggie / Poppy:

I'm sorry. As as the shadow spiders.

Hannah / Eryn:

Aaron's mouth is hanging open and a little bit of mashed potato falls out. Like, what did Poppy just do?

Tim / GM:

Poppy, I must admit this is a bit forward.

Maggie / Poppy:

I I apologize. I'll go I'll just go back and I'll go around behind the king.

Tim / GM:

Never never apologize for making your true feelings known.

Hannah / Eryn:

Wow. Who knew she had it in her?

Tim / GM:

However, as a prince, I I'm afraid I must decline, at least

Tim / GM:

for the evening, until we get to know each other more.

Maggie / Poppy:

Decline? Oh, sure. Whatever.

Tara / Journey:

Sure. Whatever.

Tim / GM:

There's, peaks and lulls to the conversation, as people are clearly very hungry and, eating through their food here. And then when king Glutius Maximus is near done with his gigantic plate of brisket, he says,

Tim / GM:

the witch, Muldrift. She saved all of us. Small castle was facing overpopulation, lack of resources, infrastructure couldn't keep up, overbuilt, underworked, too little skill, too many needy people. Muldryph showed up, offered her services for next to nothing. Seemed like complete charity,

Tim / GM:

too good to be true. And she worked for months on

Tim / GM:

the magic. And now life is easy. Pardon us. However, she's been reclusive for several weeks now. Ever since these rats have been about and getting worse, she's been hiding away in her tower.

Tim / GM:

I'd be lying if I said it didn't make me uneasy, but we've not been able to contact her unless she contacts us.

John / Doran:

You can't just go up and see her.

Tim / GM:

You're welcome to try.

John / Doran:

What stops you? She has trapped

Tim / GM:

her enclosure, her tower that we've given her to preside in. She's trapped into oblivion.

Hannah / Eryn:

It's a smart woman.

Tim / GM:

And who are you again?

Hannah / Eryn:

Oh, I'm Eren.

Tim / GM:

What's her title?

Hannah / Eryn:

I'm just it's just Aaron.

Tim / GM:

No such thing. You can't get through the gates without a title.

Maggie / Poppy:

I

Hannah / Eryn:

need to go to the bathroom. And Erin gets up and then goes to my bathroom.

Tim / GM:

Strange title.

Thomas / Guy:

Erin needs to go to the bathroom.

Maggie / Poppy:

Did we not give her one?

Thomas / Guy:

She was she was Peter.

Maggie / Poppy:

Easy peep.

Hannah / Eryn:

Oh. When I came in. Erin goes to the bathroom and then comes back quickly.

Tim / GM:

Yeah.

Maggie / Poppy:

This is just Aaron.

Tim / GM:

Indeed. Just Aaron.

Hannah / Eryn:

Yes. Aaron the just.

Tim / GM:

Aaron the just. Now that's a name. You hear that? Z list Lapenus?

Maggie / Poppy:

It's it's like z list lepenis.

Tim / GM:

Z z list lepenis.

Maggie / Poppy:

That is too good. Absolutely.

Thomas / Guy:

Z list little penis.

Tim / GM:

Z list little penis.

Maggie / Poppy:

Lil penis.

Tim / GM:

Wow. What a dunce.

Tim / GM:

You will need to leave the shield if you're going to make for the tower. You won't be under the protection, which means you'll be subject to animals, things out there until you unshrink again. But afraid the unshrinking doesn't happen until you reach the tower itself. It's a treacherous journey.

Maggie / Poppy:

Journey. Treacherous journey.

Thomas / Guy:

What was it that brought, Muldriff here in the first place?

Tim / GM:

He immediately looks at, queen Clathora, and they both do this, like, mini shrug between each other. We don't know. She seems to

Tim / GM:

have been helping us out

Tim / GM:

of the goodness of her heart. She saw

Tim / GM:

a problem and solved it, and we did not stop to ask questions.

John / Doran:

Can I inside check that?

Tim / GM:

Yeah. Okay.

John / Doran:

26.

Tim / GM:

Oh. She's telling the absolute truth. They just took a good thing at face value. And they get that something's wrong now, but they're not sure what.

John / Doran:

I'm not sure how you came into being the royal family. Did you ever commune with the great beast, or did anyone that's still here ever?

Tim / GM:

Yes. We've some of our clerics in the past have spoken with them and lord Tryck at the bottom of the island. It's been a a great many months. Certainly, not since, the witch has been here. We've, exchanged providers, you could say.

John / Doran:

As in Muldrifft is now? Well,

Tim / GM:

jeez. Previously, the reason for our success was Vermin Lordric protected the island.

Tim / GM:

Now I would say

Tim / GM:

the reason for our success is the witch.

Maggie / Poppy:

You must be some witch.

John / Doran:

We never said exactly what happened at Baxi or Lore. We weren't able to save Lore. In both cases, the bismite was being drained unsustainably, and lore fell from the sky rapidly, plummeted. Anyone who is still on the Skyland is almost certainly dead.

Tim / GM:

Then you must work to stop it.

John / Doran:

Back, see, the same was happening. Fortunately, though, with a lot of bravado and community, we were able to re empower the Bismite and the great beast even.

Tim / GM:

Is that what you intend to do here?

John / Doran:

We aren't able to do anything. We we can certainly try to help, but it must come from you. Being royalty is not all just getting the fanciest foods and having a ridiculously huge banquet hall.

Tim / GM:

Oh, you're not the heroes of

Tim / GM:

the clouds. I I thought we were saved at the moment we met.

John / Doran:

That's not exactly how it works.

Maggie / Poppy:

We know what can fix it, but but our power is minimal.

Tim / GM:

I fear it's been a long while since the people of Small Castle have given much of anything.

John / Doran:

If we have to, we will leave, and this skyline will fall. You gotta change something about that. We're not going to save you by ourselves. All we can do is help you save yourselves.

Tim / GM:

Well, you'll you'll certainly try, won't you? All the wealth in the world to share with you should you be successful. Why not just try the damn thing?

Maggie / Poppy:

We'll see what we can do. I think we need to talk to the witch.

Tim / GM:

Certainly. Posthaste. Yes. I I agree.

Tim / GM:

A a fantastic place to start.

Maggie / Poppy:

My first dessert?

John / Doran:

Dessert, yes. And, any of these clerics, are are any still around that, spoke with the vermin lord?

Tim / GM:

Afraid not, my friend.

Tim / GM:

Their last excursion

Tim / GM:

to go see the vermin lord himself was unsuccessful. They did not return.

Hannah / Eryn:

How many clerics didn't return?

Tim / GM:

Four in total.

Maggie / Poppy:

What were their names? Jesus Christ.

Tara / Journey:

1st and last.

John / Doran:

And titles.

Maggie / Poppy:

And titles.

Tara / Journey:

And titles.

Hannah / Eryn:

And accents.

Tim / GM:

Huey, Dewey, Louie, and screw you.

Tara / Journey:

Screw you.

Maggie / Poppy:

Actually, no. Keep that. That's perfect.

Tim / GM:

Some people start to stand from the banquet table, whether they're uncomfortable with the energy that's been created in this room or other reasons, that the dinner is winding down. Some of them are busting their own plates, a little uncharacteristic for royalty. At that, prince volvin is determined for dessert.

Maggie / Poppy:

Alright. What do you want?

Tim / GM:

Poppy through these crystals, I've only been able to gaze at your lemon cakes. I'm afraid just the tart and sweet has made such a miracle in the vision of my own taste buds. I must have it for real.

Maggie / Poppy:

Lemon tarts. Alright. You have the ingredients.

Tim / GM:

We have everything you could need, puppies. It's right here. Everything you need. He leans down to you. Everything you could want, puppies Oh.

Tim / GM:

Right here.

Maggie / Poppy:

Great. Thank thank you. Could you go get me some lemons?

Tim / GM:

Absolutely. I'll get them for you myself.

Tim / GM:

Okay. Jarvis, please fetch me some flour,

Maggie / Poppy:

some lemons.

Maggie / Poppy:

Alright. Well, the first rule of baking is personal space. Things don't quite rise the right way if there's too much body heat.

Tim / GM:

Don't we want it to prove even more? He, slides a hand over yours like he's going to ghost you into mixing the

John / Doran:

bowl. We don't have be here. Right?

Tim / GM:

We can all The whole

John / Doran:

party's just watching this happen right now.

Tara / Journey:

Why are we all in the kitchen?

Hannah / Eryn:

Aaron pushes the prince accidentally just a little bit, into Poppy.

Maggie / Poppy:

No. You're

Maggie / Poppy:

jumping the wrong way.

Tim / GM:

He bumps the ladle in it. It gets some royal icing on your nose. And he goes,

Tim / GM:

oh, Poppy, you've got something just there.

Maggie / Poppy:

He got his royal icing on my nose. Oh.

Tim / GM:

He, reaches in and wipes it off with a finger, and then you can see him just lick his fingers.

Hannah / Eryn:

Oh. Seems like things are rising just fine.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh, no. Oh, Jesus.

John / Doran:

Erin, do you wanna learn some baking too?

Hannah / Eryn:

Yeah. Let's go.

Maggie / Poppy:

I guess I'm I'm teaching

Maggie / Poppy:

a baking class now. Everyone stay. Goodbye. I'm all good. Journey's

Tara / Journey:

by the door already.

Thomas / Guy:

Looks like you got this one, honey.

Maggie / Poppy:

Why have you forsaken me?

Tim / GM:

Journey, King Glutius corners you about selling perhaps some of your hair or fur to him at an exotic price.

Tara / Journey:

I mean, I don't

Tim / GM:

I've just never seen such a creature.

John / Doran:

It'd have been a

Tim / GM:

shame to not have some kind of memorabilia as you left. Lock of your hair, one of these glowing creatures.

Tara / Journey:

What are you gonna do with it?

Tim / GM:

I'll just have. We'll put it in the room of collections.

Tara / Journey:

You have a room of collections?

Tim / GM:

He gestures to a broad open door that is just full of, like, animal horns and just like parts of beasts and all this, like, quote unquote exotic stuff he's collected.

Tara / Journey:

I don't know I don't know how I feel about being called exotic.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. He appreciates you basically as a beast.

Tara / Journey:

Yeah. I don't know. Sir, I I really appreciate your hospitality here. I think I might wanna hang on to all my body parts, and I I don't think the buds are interested in sticking around. You you see they've kinda retreated into my hair.

Tim / GM:

I will tell you. It's it's refreshing to hear such a level of of, unmettered savagery. It's it's refreshing. Honesty. Yes.

Tara / Journey:

It's great.

Tim / GM:

Oh, Jesus. I appreciate the bluntness, and, yeah, of course, I

Tim / GM:

can make you part with things that are yours. I'm the same way much myself. I wouldn't give a single thing away ever for any reason.

Tara / Journey:

Yeah. I I can respect that. Nice chatting with you, your honest.

Tim / GM:

You as well. I mean it.

Maggie / Poppy:

I thought you said your anus.

Tara / Journey:

Well well,

Tim / GM:

we can say that, baking lesson concludes with, minimal results from Fulvyn.

Maggie / Poppy:

I think I would have gotten so fed up that I would just flashbake a couple

Tim / GM:

Nice.

Maggie / Poppy:

And, like, there you go.

Tim / GM:

Oh, okay. Here's what happens. You know that thing in baking shows when they're like, and then you put it in the oven for 45 minutes, and here we have the finished product. Yeah.

Hannah / Eryn:

That's perfect.

Maggie / Poppy:

Like, wow. Look how fast that was.

Maggie / Poppy:

Because I had flash baked them off to the side. Yeah.

Tim / GM:

And you see him, he is fully prepared to, like, make a big show of how delicious they are and everything. And then you see it actually hit him, the kind of magical deliciousness of these things. And he actually he's kind of beside himself, and he's no longer eloquent. He says, Poppy, these are really,

Tim / GM:

really good, Poppy. Oh my god.

Maggie / Poppy:

Thank you.

Tim / GM:

You can see him, like, actually drooling out of the corner of his mouth. He says, I I'm so sorry. Beside myself, Poppy. I

Maggie / Poppy:

I can teach your cooks the recipe.

Tim / GM:

But then what of us?

Maggie / Poppy:

What?

Maggie / Poppy:

Prince Baldwin, you are very nice and rather handsome and tall, but I don't think it would work. You're royalty, and I'm a kitchen witch. And I'm destined to sail the skies, spreading baked goods everywhere.

Tim / GM:

Brings a hand to his eyes and he says, oh,

Tim / GM:

papa, you speak true. It would never work between us. How naive I've been.

Maggie / Poppy:

Not naive, but perhaps a little Hasty. Hasty. Maybe one day, we can talk about it again.

Tim / GM:

I look forward to that day. For now, I must retire for my heart has been broken.

Hannah / Eryn:

Love it.

Tim / GM:

And, yeah. He,

Tim / GM:

he leaves you alone for the evening.

Hannah / Eryn:

Darren and Aaron just exchange a look like,

Tara / Journey:

what's going on there?

Tim / GM:

Not everyone

Maggie / Poppy:

can be

Tim / GM:

a perfect couple.

John / Doran:

Pull out the stuff in our oven. It's just like charred Yeah. Pieces of lemon on it.

Tara / Journey:

It's because you guys were just mixing random crap in a bowl watching Poppy and Malvin.

Tim / GM:

It's a it's a cupcake pan with, more more and more primitive ingredients. The last one just has

Maggie / Poppy:

a lemon in it. Yeah.

John / Doran:

This is pretty good. It's like crisp lemon. Yeah. This might be something here. I'll tell.

Hannah / Eryn:

Yeah. I've never cooked anything in my life, so this turned out pretty okay, I think.

Maggie / Poppy:

Let's leave the baking to me.

Hannah / Eryn:

I think that's a good idea.

John / Doran:

Well, we wrote it down just in case, and I hand Poppy us a piece of paper.

Maggie / Poppy:

Put lemon in pie pie.

Tim / GM:

Pie tin.

Maggie / Poppy:

Pie tin.

Tim / GM:

Lemons in pie tin. 10 lemon pie tin.

Maggie / Poppy:

Bake for 3 hours.

Tim / GM:

It just says 10 lemon.

Tim / GM:

Is a

John / Doran:

guy in the kitchen with us?

Thomas / Guy:

No. I left you alone, I think.

Tim / GM:

Okay. What did Guy get up to?

Thomas / Guy:

Guy just wants to talk strategy with, Servix, I guess, about how to better defend the place from shadow creatures.

John / Doran:

Sure.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. While everyone else has kind of moved on to the kitchen in this baking lesson, the 2 of you stayed at the table and just, more rounds of drinks kept coming for the 2 of you. Cervix has a big flag in

Tim / GM:

in front of him, and he says, we've tried damn near everything I can think of. We've, we even got more guards posted at the gates than usual, but the rats aren't coming through the gates.

Thomas / Guy:

They are coming from down below?

Tim / GM:

Indeed. Somewhere. The shield must be weak.

Thomas / Guy:

And when did their numbers start increasing?

Tim / GM:

Certainly since the witch. Since, something's been driving them. It's been harder and harder to see what's going on outside of tiny castle ever since we've been in tiny castle. I haven't I haven't much idea.

Thomas / Guy:

So, Vix, if you may speak plainly, soldier to soldier, Has the arrival of the witch been a boon for a small castle, or has it made things worse?

Tim / GM:

It's been a godsend. I've done everything for us. God, if you'd seen this place before the witch, there was poverty. There was overpopulation. There was lack of infrastructure.

Tim / GM:

A crumbling island. We'd almost given up, and then she gave us another chance. But it's not perfect. Far from it.

Thomas / Guy:

But what about it is not perfect?

Tim / GM:

Everything relies on the witch. We haven't been able to get in contact with her. We can't solve our problems. We're at her mercy. Even when the delivery of food will run dry eventually.

Tim / GM:

Non communicative as she is. It's been too difficult. That's why we need you. Go get to her. Talk some sense into her.

Thomas / Guy:

We will do what we can. But remember, it is your duty to protect these people.

Tim / GM:

I I remain here. You just do what you can, and keep your mouth shut about Varian and I. What? What? About who?

Tim / GM:

You heard me. Soldier to soldier.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. I could not care less about that.

Tara / Journey:

Speaking of Ovaia, after my conversation with the king, I'd like to seek out princess Ovaia. Okay.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. Things have moved on from dinner a little bit, and, you've all been invited to stay at the castle, which is luxurious accommodations more than you've ever seen before. Journey, you catch ovarian walking through the hallways in the evening.

Tara / Journey:

Excuse me, your highness. I just wanted a quick word.

Tim / GM:

What's up, hair? Yeah.

Tara / Journey:

You can call me Journey.

Tim / GM:

Oh, that's right. Lead explorer, Journey, Journey.

Tara / Journey:

No. Just Journey is fine. That's okay. I just wanted to talk to you real quick. I guess woman to woman to some extent.

Tim / GM:

Okay, Dash. Let's hear it.

Tara / Journey:

I guess I don't know any other way to put this. Cervix is terrible.

Tim / GM:

Well, he's, like, literally the best, so I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. Princess. The best.

Tara / Journey:

I'm telling you, you got a lot going for you. A lot. And that guy? Sorry. Not guy, but sir Vicks?

Tara / Journey:

He's awful. He might look like a knight. I know you said something about boys and nats. He looks like a knight, but inside, he's a boy. And he is never gonna treat you right.

Tim / GM:

Okay. Let me think about that for a second. Can you make a persuasion check?

Tara / Journey:

I would love to do that. It's not gonna go well, but I'm gonna try. Oh, maybe it'll go okay. 15.

Tim / GM:

Bye bye.

Tara / Journey:

Bye bye.

Tim / GM:

I don't think you know what you're talking about. I think I've been watching him joust for the last 5 years. And now that it's, like, a little less icky, it's a total yes for me. Unless what you're trying to do here is tell me that you've got a better option, which I think you might, which I think we should talk about. So tell me about this guy.

Tara / Journey:

Oh my god. Because he's

Tim / GM:

pretty much, like, better and hunkier than this other sir, And I'm thinking, yes, please.

Tara / Journey:

Here's the thing. Guy is the type of person that you should be going after.

Tim / GM:

Okay.

Tara / Journey:

Here's why.

Tim / GM:

We are talking.

Tara / Journey:

Here's why. Guy has respect for other people.

Tim / GM:

Not the top of my list, but okay. What else?

Tara / Journey:

He cares about what happens to them, and he cares about who they are as individuals.

Tim / GM:

Kind of the same thing.

Tara / Journey:

Cervix, when asked about you Uh-huh. Lied a ton and said all sorts of garbage about you.

Tim / GM:

That's because he's being romantic.

Tara / Journey:

It's not romantic to be toxic.

Tim / GM:

He's hiding me because I'm his dark secret or whatever.

Tara / Journey:

And that's bad. You you and look at you, you shouldn't be anybody's secret.

Tim / GM:

Make a persuasion check on that.

John / Doran:

That's a

Tim / GM:

that's a good, poignant point.

Tara / Journey:

I'm so sweaty, bitch.

Tim / GM:

With advantage.

Tara / Journey:

Oh my god.

Tim / GM:

Thank you, Poppy.

Maggie / Poppy:

You're welcome.

Maggie / Poppy:

With advantage.

Tara / Journey:

16.

Tim / GM:

Hey. I kind of get it.

Tara / Journey:

You deserve better, and that's all I gotta say.

Tim / GM:

I kind of get it.

Tara / Journey:

Well, maybe if you think about it for a while, maybe you'll get it more as time goes on. Anyway, have a good night.

Tim / GM:

Alright. Which one is Guy's room? Do you know?

Tara / Journey:

I have no idea, And then I walk away. I don't know if that's true or not.

John / Doran:

Sure. Can I actually try to find Diabolo Yeah? At some point?

Tim / GM:

Yeah.

John / Doran:

Okay. Before we meet up as a group.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. Diabolo is, like, being, like, handed his coat and stuff as he's about to leave, the keep, for the evening back to his apothecary. When he sees you again, he goes

Maggie / Poppy:

Uh-huh. Sorry.

Tara / Journey:

Oh, Jesus.

John / Doran:

Start with me.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. Sarco captain Doran. Is that right?

John / Doran:

It is still me, and, good to see you again, Diabolo. Sorry. I forgot the extent of your titles. What was it? Apothecary?

Tim / GM:

Apothecary Sharpshooter. Sharpshooter. Machiavelli Moriarty Diabolo.

Tara / Journey:

But he's not evil.

John / Doran:

No. Right. So, strange large table, not many seats taken, and I just totally respect your profession as an apothecary. I can't imagine you you're the only one and you're but you're the only one at the table. Indeed.

Tim / GM:

The family has

Tim / GM:

been able to trust fewer and fewer

Tim / GM:

throughout these last weeks. It seems I'm still on their good side. I'm,

Tim / GM:

provide the family with

Tim / GM:

the much needed medicines in these times of need. Oh,

John / Doran:

yeah. So, just a city full of untrustworthy people then.

Tim / GM:

Mhmm.

John / Doran:

So so few that are trustworthy.

Tim / GM:

I find them trustworthy. However, the royal family has been perhaps paranoid.

John / Doran:

We are going to try to save the Skyland, and you want that to happen, I assume.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. Indeed. Bali.

John / Doran:

So, you know, just a little bit of info. I might ask for awareness so we we have all the facts. What sort of medicine is in need at Tiny Castle? Is there an ailment going around? What what exactly are you providing?

Tim / GM:

Depends on the member of the family. King Glutius suffers with his blood pressure, of course. Anxiety for the queen. The occasional contraceptive. Yes.

John / Doran:

Right. I understand you're in a bit of a predicament by me asking you these questions.

Tim / GM:

The Hippocratic Oath hasn't been invented.

Maggie / Poppy:

Okay. Great.

John / Doran:

So, let me be upfront with you a bit here. I'm worried more about this one than Baxi. I can see this skyline falling and everyone dying. I don't want that to happen.

Tim / GM:

You're some kind of profit?

John / Doran:

No. There's just a lot of barriers here that's gonna make this very hard for things to turn out right. Anything you can share with me that can help me understand the intricacies of this little knot of issues that are preventing us from saving ourselves would be much appreciated. Very well. I'll lay it

Tim / GM:

out plainly for you as I understand it.

Tim / GM:

Dorn, my good man. Ignore the royal family. They've no power here.

Tim / GM:

Speak with Maisie and only Maisie. She holds all the cards, of course.

John / Doran:

So your loyalty is to, Maisie?

Tim / GM:

My loyalty is to my own survival, which is This Island.

John / Doran:

Alright. Well, I don't wanna keep you forever. Thanks for what you've shared, and, I hope this works out.

Tim / GM:

Should you need anything, you can call on me, and

Tim / GM:

you can trust me. Machiavelli Moriarty Diabolo. Yeah.

Hannah / Eryn:

Yeah. If you need any contraceptives, you know where to go, Doran.

Tim / GM:

Right. You have all been given, like, a wing of the keep all to yourself. So there's, there's, like, 8 rooms and a big circle around here and then a central, like, actual courtyard that's outside that you guys can have a little bonfire in and kind of sit out and talk together.

Hannah / Eryn:

The bonfires just got tiny, tiny sticks.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. It's essentially they just, like, one person just picks up a match and, like, uses their whole body to strike it, and that's the campfire.

John / Doran:

I'm going to use prestidigitation to make some, additional crackling noises. Just trying to disguise the sounds we can hopefully talk in, privacy.

Tim / GM:

I'm imagining in post. I'm just doubling the bonfire as it heads now. Yeah.

Hannah / Eryn:

We're all

Maggie / Poppy:

going, what? Yeah.

John / Doran:

So we're shouting. It's not working. Yeah.

Thomas / Guy:

Okay. How did your dessert lesson go, puppy?

Maggie / Poppy:

I don't wanna talk about it.

Maggie / Poppy:

This family is a little weird.

Thomas / Guy:

They do seem quite odd.

Tara / Journey:

I cast ass without trace. Mhmm. I think things here are really weird and maybe bad.

Maggie / Poppy:

Yeah.

Thomas / Guy:

I have picked up on this as well.

Maggie / Poppy:

Is everyone sleeping with each other? I don't understand.

Tara / Journey:

I don't know. I tried to talk the princess out of some of her exploits because that poor girl is just getting used.

John / Doran:

Guy, you spent some time speaking with Sir Vicks. Right?

Thomas / Guy:

I did.

John / Doran:

I think this royal family is, a danger to the people. I don't know if it's through malice or negligence or incompetence or something, but I don't like our chances on this one.

Tara / Journey:

I don't think they're gonna be able to convince the people to do anything.

Thomas / Guy:

I believe the royal family does want what is best for its people, but something about this place feels oddly familiar to me.

Hannah / Eryn:

I feel like they're the type of royal family that only cares about the people enough so that they can continue to be royal. Yeah.

Maggie / Poppy:

I I kinda thought that's just how all leadership was.

John / Doran:

Have you met any?

Maggie / Poppy:

Well, I'm from Tilted Tree.

John / Doran:

So

Maggie / Poppy:

That's just kinda how business goes. Right?

Tara / Journey:

It just seemed real out of touch.

John / Doran:

What about Farewell? I don't disagree. Just Liberia was not perfect, but good. I think these people are far from perfect. I get the worst vibes from Tayo Ballo.

John / Doran:

I'm not sure. Know.

Maggie / Poppy:

I don't know.

Hannah / Eryn:

I think the king was giving off some pretty awful vibe salsa.

Tara / Journey:

To take my hair.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh, that's weird. You

Hannah / Eryn:

didn't give it

Tara / Journey:

to him, did you? No. Gross. He was calling me all sorts of weird stuff. I didn't like him at all.

Thomas / Guy:

The pressures of leadership are not to be understated, but that doesn't mean these people haven't made some terrible mistakes along the way.

Tara / Journey:

We all know we gotta talk to the witch.

Hannah / Eryn:

Well, yeah. Yeah. Maybe that'll provide some clarity.

John / Doran:

What do you Go ahead.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh, I was just gonna say something my mom said, but we don't have to.

John / Doran:

No. I wanna hear what your mom said, Poppy.

Hannah / Eryn:

We all we all need to

Thomas / Guy:

know, Poppy. I love these little nuggets of wisdom.

Maggie / Poppy:

I think if you work hard enough for a very long time, you're allowed to kind of take over, right, and do nothing.

Hannah / Eryn:

Yeah. But I think these royals haven't worked a day in their life is all I'm saying.

Tara / Journey:

Matt makes rat.

John / Doran:

Guy, you said this was familiar to you somehow. What do you mean by that? Well, it's

Tim / GM:

just,

Thomas / Guy:

this kingdom was on the precipice of disaster. They said poverty, unrest was destroying the kingdom. And then, well, this witch arrived and they gave their fate over to, another power, one unknown to them. It may have saved them in the moment, but I worry what will happen when we take Maisie from this place. And don't get me wrong, I'm here to save Maisie for my friend Stede.

Tim / GM:

That message is punctuated by the hollow sound of pinch wiggling out of Poppy and falling to the ground as a hardened, baked bread

John / Doran:

boy. Poppy, may maybe we should just put him in the fire and have him come back tomorrow.

Maggie / Poppy:

See that? That's my side.

John / Doran:

He looks like he's in pain.

Maggie / Poppy:

Hold on. Shh. Don't speak. It's gotta be painful. I'm gonna telepathically try and, like, connect with him.

Tim / GM:

Yeah.

Maggie / Poppy:

Are you tired?

Tim / GM:

Quite alright.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh, what?

Tim / GM:

Mother, I I'm I'm quite crusty, mother.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh, boy, sweet boy.

Tim / GM:

I've been baked, it seems.

Maggie / Poppy:

Are you okay?

Tim / GM:

I'm fine. There's no pain, mother.

Maggie / Poppy:

Can you go back to splishing?

Tim / GM:

With some time and some water, yes. Alright. Or Hold me close, mother.

Maggie / Poppy:

Okay. I'll hug him.

Maggie / Poppy:

Close your eyes.

Tim / GM:

Okay.

Maggie / Poppy:

Just everything's great. I'm, like, stroking

Maggie / Poppy:

his head, and then I squish him into dough again.

Tim / GM:

You, yeah. Kind of like playing with a single slice of bread, you know, and you squish down, you're like a little dough ball. Yeah. You squish, pinch down, until he becomes doughy and soft again. And as long as you maintain that telepathic bond the entire time, he's just going, mother,

Tim / GM:

mother, mother, Mother.

Tim / GM:

It's creepy. Mother.

Tim / GM:

Yeah.

Maggie / Poppy:

I'm gonna turn it off. Okay. Good.

Maggie / Poppy:

He's fine.

Hannah / Eryn:

I love that.

Thomas / Guy:

Everything okay with Finch?

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh, wait. He just needed a little,

Tim / GM:

tough love.

Maggie / Poppy:

Tough love. Just gotta pound him into shape. You know?

John / Doran:

We might have to do the same with tiny castle.

Maggie / Poppy:

Well, that's what parents do.

John / Doran:

The parents of the clouds. Sure.

Thomas / Guy:

Cloud dads.

John / Doran:

Guy, if we we should speak with, Maze before we decide anything, but would you put cervix in charge if it comes to it?

Thomas / Guy:

I do question his ability, perhaps, but

Tara / Journey:

That guy's an ass. I wouldn't put him in charge of anything. I know you didn't ask me, but that guy sucks.

Thomas / Guy:

Well, if your primary concern is him slaying shadow monsters that are attacking the kingdom, I think he is their best shot besides us.

Tara / Journey:

Being a good fatter doesn't make you a good leader.

John / Doran:

We need to speak with Maisie.

Thomas / Guy:

She likely knows more of what's going on here than any of

John / Doran:

us. Erin, I don't know how tired you are.

Hannah / Eryn:

It's been a long day. Why?

John / Doran:

I think it'd be nice to trail Diabolo.

Tara / Journey:

Goats to oh,

Hannah / Eryn:

what were you gonna say? Sorry.

John / Doran:

Go trail Diabolo. Okay. He's up to something. He told me a bit, but not enough to know exactly what's happening. Something about contraceptives.

John / Doran:

It's the way he was talking about it. He was a bit can I roll in retroactive and say, please, like, yeah?

Tim / GM:

It's like I feel

John / Doran:

like we never did a role to confirm. Yeah. Well, 26. Well, what

Tim / GM:

he was trying to impart on you is that, the king has an issue with his blood pressure, the queen has an issue with anxiety, and young ovarian needs contraceptives on the regular for her relationship with cervix.

Hannah / Eryn:

I can I I'm not that tired? I I can try

Tara / Journey:

to go spy on him a little bit.

John / Doran:

His loyalties aren't clear, and it'd be good to know a bit more about that one.

Tara / Journey:

Yeah. I also haven't spied in a while, so it might be kind

Hannah / Eryn:

of fun, you know, watch people from the dark shadows.

Tim / GM:

So I think, the 4 of you back at the, keep have a nice long rest. But before Erin is able to lay down for the evening, she goes and spies.

Maggie / Poppy:

Spy. Spy.

Tim / GM:

Your initial stealth check.

John / Doran:

Oh. Can I have Bartek inspiration, Erin, just as she's As she's walking out?

Maggie / Poppy:

Just slap her on the ass.

Tim / GM:

You're playing her out? Like playing music as she's leaving?

Tara / Journey:

Mhmm. Yeah.

Hannah / Eryn:

My stealth is plus 10. So I got 13. And then I'm gonna use, Doran's barding inspo for a whole another 114.

Tim / GM:

Erin, it has been a while since you spied. You approach, Moriarty's place, Machiavelli Moriarty di Apollo, his apothecary, which he lives above, back in the other side of town. You, do some second story work as you've done, a lot in your past. I think you actually have an ability called second story work. You climb a gutter pipe, on the side of the building, which you don't realize is made of lead and soft enough for you to kind of, mangle as you're climbing up.

Tim / GM:

The lead kind of gutter that you're on completely tears off, and it makes a loud noise as you're on the side of the building. You're now sitting in a flower bed outside of one of his windows. He looks up, and he registers you, but he doesn't do anything about it. But for the rest of the night, as you're watching this guy, he makes himself a cup of tea before bed. He reads a chapter of a, religious text about the god Helm, the god of protection.

Tim / GM:

He picks up an echo bell. He has an hour and a half long conversation with someone who you can only surmise as his grandmother. He writes in his journal. He prays to his deity. In his prayers, you can hear him mention each one of you by name and title, and he wishes the best for each of you on your journey to the next day.

Hannah / Eryn:

Can I do an insight check

Maggie / Poppy:

on how sincere he sees

Maggie / Poppy:

For sure?

Hannah / Eryn:

Yeah. In his actions tonight? Yeah.

Maggie / Poppy:

I love this.

Hannah / Eryn:

No one's that good. 18. Insight.

Tim / GM:

Sure. It dawns on you after watching him that this man is so trusting of the greater world that even though he was pretty sure he saw someone spying in his own window, he's going to trust that you don't mean him any further harm, and he's gonna go about his night the same way he always does.

Tara / Journey:

Alright.

Tim / GM:

This guy is through and through one of the best, most dutiful, devoted, contented people you've ever met.

Hannah / Eryn:

Aaron leaves the flower bed and, heads on back to our rooms.

Maggie / Poppy:

Just slide into Dornsburg. Hey. He's fine.

Hannah / Eryn:

He's fine. He really loves his grandma.

John / Doran:

Did we get a big, like, communal room or did we all have separate rooms or

Tim / GM:

Yeah. I think you've all got separate rooms. There's actually more than you need in this wing of keep. There's 8 rooms and only 5 of you.

Hannah / Eryn:

Yeah. Poppy can have 3 rooms. Yep.

Maggie / Poppy:

Poppy takes her pillow and her teddy bear to Journey's room.

Maggie / Poppy:

I'm worried about that guy coming in and taking your hair. Oh. Can I sleep next to you?

Tara / Journey:

Yeah, Poppy. Of course.

Maggie / Poppy:

I'll keep watch. Alright.

Hannah / Eryn:

Yeah. Erin goes to Doreen's room and says, I'm worried about that girl taking your hair from you. Is it okay if I

Maggie / Poppy:

sleep with you?

Maggie / Poppy:

What girl?

Tim / GM:

It worked for Poppy. Alright. I think we actually speed right on through to when you guys are on the road again.

Maggie / Poppy:

On the road again.

Hannah / Eryn:

Long rest?

Tim / GM:

Long rest.

Tara / Journey:

Long rest.

Tim / GM:

You're all out of the road again. You are outside the walls of the Kingdom of Tiny Castle and outside the protective sphere that keeps it all in. A canopy of mushrooms and ferns overhead protects you from the outside view, though you know there are a few dangerous things out here. An untrunken owl for 1, and those shadowy rats. For all the beauty of life at this scale, you can't help feeling a little vulnerable.

Tim / GM:

And as you're walking, again down here in the dim light in the undergrowth, a Fey Bud moves from Journey towards Erin, and it begins to swirl around you, Erin.

Tim / GM:

What do you do?

Hannah / Eryn:

Journey, your little friend is watching me.

Tara / Journey:

Oh, yeah. Not nice. Or is it nice?

Hannah / Eryn:

Are they safe?

Tara / Journey:

I mean, safe as you or me?

Maggie / Poppy:

Erin does not feel comforted by that.

Tara / Journey:

Sure. He's just smiling and just a very, like, playful look on her face.

Hannah / Eryn:

Cool. Erin just kinda tries to not touch it.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. Erin, it stops swirling around you, and it instead hovers right in front of your face as you're walking. It keeps pace with you, but it just hovers in front of your face where you can see it. Can't make out the features on this thing. As best you can tell, it has a vaguely humanoid shape when you're really looking close, but it's tough because they're just kind of made of light.

Hannah / Eryn:

With my Ganymede eyes, I've never tried to look at something, like, magnifying close, but is that possible? Like, could I try to zoom in on it?

Tim / GM:

Interesting approach. Yeah. Give me a perception check with advantage.

Maggie / Poppy:

K. That macro lens?

Tim / GM:

Yeah. Yeah. New ability, macro lens.

Hannah / Eryn:

25. Wow.

Tim / GM:

Wow. Yeah. Wow, indeed. That's good looking. Yeah.

Tim / GM:

That's good looking. You, zoom in macarons on this little Feybud sprite, and it's, doesn't exactly work like a person. It's not like a facial expression, distraught and in some ways fearful of you.

Hannah / Eryn:

Can I tell what it's trying to communicate? What's the charade?

Tim / GM:

It wants to ask you something.

Hannah / Eryn:

Hi. My name's Erin. Just Erin.

Tim / GM:

You see it kind of bob up and down a little bit. It it confirms that it can at least understand what you're saying.

Maggie / Poppy:

Do you

Hannah / Eryn:

is there something wrong? Did you lose Journey? She's right over here.

Tim / GM:

It moves abruptly side to side to say no.

Hannah / Eryn:

Okay. I don't I don't know how to talk to you or what you need.

Tim / GM:

It takes a couple more inches away from you, Erin, and then it dives toward you as if it were attacking you, as if Journey had launched it like she does with her arrow attacks. Sometimes the Feybuds will jump in to, bolster Journey's own attacks, but this Feybud is attacking you of its own volition.

Tara / Journey:

I jump in and try to reach out and touch the Feybud.

Tim / GM:

Before it gets to her kind of thing? Mhmm.

Maggie / Poppy:

Yeah.

Hannah / Eryn:

I try to dodge.

Tara / Journey:

My intention of touching the fey bud is to feel what it's feeling.

Tim / GM:

Oh, okay. Journey, give me a, dexterity ability check. We'll call it a sleight of hand.

Tara / Journey:

15.

Tim / GM:

Not bad. You prevent this thing from doing any harm to Aaron. Not that it really would have on its own per se, maybe a little, but when you catch it you feel the kind of radiant burn of this thing in your palm, but you also feel this sort of anguish, this desperate yearning for why, a lack of understanding. This thing feels safety towards Aaron, but it's still wracked with a lack of understanding. It's asking Erin why.

Tara / Journey:

Erin, you see Journey clutch her own hand and bend over, like, hunch. And for a second, she just is kind of holding her own shaking hand, and then she looks up at you. Why? It's asking why.

Hannah / Eryn:

So

Tara / Journey:

I may have had to

Tim / GM:

Guy, you're passing beneath a large heavy bridge that's laid across some debris overhead, And as you're passing underneath, you realize that's not a bridge at all. It's a sword. An unshrunken sword, a claymore fallen to the floor. Cool. And at this size, the grandeur of it has you thinking.

Tim / GM:

You see flashes, visions. You see virin. You see a procession of knights in green armor, a celebration, a gathering, the entire kingdom, the king, the prince, your family, your wife and daughter, Doran's face. Doran's face?

Maggie / Poppy:

What?

Tim / GM:

Guy, you weren't looking where you were going, lost in these moments. You stumble over an acorn the size of a beach ball and topple over a door.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh. You are now laying on top of

Tim / GM:

Aaron, you have to stop yourself from tripping over as you and Journey have been kind of continuing, like, side by side in tandem. Now this is more important in the moment because right after that, I need you all to make a perception check.

Tara / Journey:

Nope. Do any of us get advantage for any sort of Ganymede?

Tim / GM:

Erin does for sight. Yeah, baby. Small dice.

Hannah / Eryn:

Aaron, got 25.

Tara / Journey:

Yeah. 17.

Tim / GM:

18. 10.

Maggie / Poppy:

17.

Tim / GM:

Wow. Everybody of Doran sees the owl in the rafters again.

Thomas / Guy:

This guy right on top

Tara / Journey:

of him. Yeah.

Tim / GM:

You know, that that makes a hell

Tim / GM:

of a lot of sense.

Tim / GM:

Guy, you're protecting Doran from the owl. Yeah. This noise, the clattering of Guy falling was enough to get its attention. You all see a neck rotating a 180 degrees to look down at you on the ground. You see it ruffle its wings and begin to take flight.

Hannah / Eryn:

We better get cover. Eren tries to dash towards something.

Thomas / Guy:

Can we get under this sword or is it like flat on the No.

Tim / GM:

Not flat

Tim / GM:

on the ground at all. You you, run towards the hill to where

Tim / GM:

it gets kind of closer

Tim / GM:

to the ground and you can tuck yourself underneath there.

John / Doran:

As it gets close, I'm gonna shoot off a bunch of sparks with prestidigitation to try to, like and then try to make some sounds with it too. Just trying to spook it, basically.

Tim / GM:

Performance with

John / Doran:

advantage. Unnatural twenty. Unnatural because you cheated or

Tara / Journey:

It's not that true.

Thomas / Guy:

The bird asked Journey for some of her hair.

Maggie / Poppy:

The

Tim / GM:

bird ended up with a 15. Okay. You see the bird make a dive. The owl comes towards the sword. Those sparks, have it diverted, a good few feet off away from you.

Tim / GM:

It doesn't quite track where all of you little delicious people ran off to and instead starts taloning and scratching in the dirt and

Tim / GM:

the cobbles

Tim / GM:

where those sparks are landed.

Maggie / Poppy:

Journey, the path is without trace.

Tara / Journey:

Oh, good idea.

John / Doran:

I Or can't you talk to these things?

Tara / Journey:

Every time I try, it just goes real bad. Okay. I'm thinking about giving that spell up. Yeah. I cast pass without trace.

Tim / GM:

The owl seems incapable of finding all of you. Though it's on the ground now, it you see it continue to turn its head completely to one side and then the other just scanning the ground again and again. You've got this thing between you and outside, but you are close because from here, you can see the door to Maizey's tower. You were told that the unshrinking happens soon after you get to the tower, So the question is, how far do you have to run before you unshrink?

John / Doran:

Oh, I think I'm gonna do something stupid. I tried to push the guy aside a bit and try to

Tim / GM:

As you're whispering that, everybody's

John / Doran:

like, alright. Here he goes.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh, you're always doing something stupid.

John / Doran:

Really helps my confidence, Poppy.

Maggie / Poppy:

You can do it.

Tim / GM:

It's the opposite of party inspiration.

John / Doran:

Yeah. Heckling. Yeah. You the whole party gets heckling against me whenever they want. Really good.

Tara / Journey:

Yeah. Bobby's just being a realist. Yeah.

John / Doran:

Okay. I'm going to use a ability I haven't used before. It's called universal speech. Choose up to 5 creatures. They can magically understand me.

John / Doran:

K. I won't be able to understand it, but I'm going to try to speak with this owl.

Tara / Journey:

I'm gonna be so mad

Tim / GM:

about this word.

Maggie / Poppy:

I'm just

Tara / Journey:

thinking that I can't hear you. So mad.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. Continue.

John / Doran:

Journey, can you help in case this doesn't go well?

Tara / Journey:

No. Fuck that. No. Alright. Journey

Tim / GM:

No. You got this, partner.

Hannah / Eryn:

Journey loves nature. Nature. Done with the animals.

Tara / Journey:

Done trying to talk with these damn animals.

John / Doran:

Oh, wise owl. What powerful talons you have. Please don't kill us. I must say, we taste awful. But if you are hungry, I have something for you.

John / Doran:

That's not me. Care to come a little closer so we could speak?

Tim / GM:

You all see the owl's head turn towards your group and focus in exactly on you. And, Journey, Journey, you're the only one that can hear,

Maggie / Poppy:

who the fuck is this motherfucker?

Hannah / Eryn:

That's so good.

Maggie / Poppy:

A couple

Tim / GM:

of a couple of tiny hops. Yeah. A couple of tiny hops as this owl moves closer to your group and sort of, like, leans in close and squints and just gets his beak right up against your group. Who said that?

Tara / Journey:

I am so sorry. I'm so sorry. We did not mean to bother you at all. Please just go about your business. I hear there's a ton of rats in the area.

Tara / Journey:

Good eating.

Tim / GM:

No. I I wanna hear the end of this.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh, god.

Tara / Journey:

Alright, Dorrance. All on you.

Tim / GM:

Let him talk.

John / Doran:

Okay. I can't talk without strumming my lute a little bit. I hope that's okay. I take that out.

Maggie / Poppy:

Love.

John / Doran:

I play a little bit of a minor sounds that don't kinda quite go together, and it has the effect of unsettling words. Mhmm. Okay. So I'm using a bonus action, and, essentially, I'm going to be able to use, d 8 to, subtract its attempt at making a saving throw. Cool.

John / Doran:

Okay. And the spell I'm casting is suggestion. Let me let me make sure I can actually do this.

Tim / GM:

Well, I wouldn't be too keen on action economy since we're out of initiative.

John / Doran:

Right. Yeah. Okay. Okay. I'm casting suggestion.

John / Doran:

Alright. I guess 7. So whatever you rolled minus 7 is its attempt at the same and third against the spell. Interesting.

Tim / GM:

The owl lands a 0. 7 minus 7.

John / Doran:

Okay. The course of action I'm suggesting is, can you, take us up to the tower and drop us off?

Maggie / Poppy:

Or just fly away and let us go. Just take

John / Doran:

us up there and drop

Tim / GM:

us off.

Thomas / Guy:

He's doing a Gandalf.

Tim / GM:

You all see the owl, like, its eyes kind of, like, smize a little bit. Like, they squint in sort of a happy way, and you just all hear

John / Doran:

the sort of

Tim / GM:

you hear, this motherfucker really thinks I'm not gonna eat him. And instead I'm gonna take him to the okay. Alright. Yeah. Yeah.

Tim / GM:

No. It's a bold play. Alright. If I yeah. Fucking who's first?

Tim / GM:

Yeah. You could probably just

John / Doran:

you got big talons. Can you just take us all?

Tim / GM:

Doran, you see a giant talon reach in under the sword, just scraping, scraping, grabs you. Make a contested grapple check unless you choose

Tim / GM:

to fail it.

Tim / GM:

I'll fail. Okay. Doran, it grabs you. You're in the tight body. It's alright.

Tim / GM:

It's alright. Dre as Doran's being dragged away, he goes, it's alright. It's alright. And then you all see this owl take off with Doran away from the sword flying off into the night.

Maggie / Poppy:

Well, guys

Tara / Journey:

Morning. Like, it's morning. Right?

Tim / GM:

Into the morning. Sorry. Yeah. Yeah.

Maggie / Poppy:

It looks like I'm the captain now.

Tim / GM:

Doran, as you near this tower, you get within a few feet of the door, and all of a sudden, the alch goes, rock, as you become way too big for it

Tim / GM:

to carry. Did you?

Tim / GM:

Usually a horrible scrape against your back as it's telling you scratch into you, and it just drops you 15 feet out of the air onto the cobbles. You take 2 bludgeoning back to see

Maggie / Poppy:

it hit

Tim / GM:

the street and slam up against the front door.

John / Doran:

Hopefully, that counts as a knock. Okay.

Tara / Journey:

Does the owl come back, or does

Tim / GM:

it just fuck off? Flies away.

Tim / GM:

Flies off. Yeah.

Hannah / Eryn:

Yeah. Aaron's just gonna start walking towards the door where Doren, got thrown.

Tim / GM:

You solved the owl puzzle.

John / Doran:

I walked towards the rest of the party kinda like scratching my head.

Hannah / Eryn:

Are are you okay?

John / Doran:

It seemed like a I think it was a good idea.

Tim / GM:

It got up there.

Maggie / Poppy:

Was hear us? As you

Tim / GM:

get closer, your footsteps are heavy and labored, and the world around you becomes heavy again and so small as he returned to your original size.

Maggie / Poppy:

I walk

Maggie / Poppy:

up to him and I kick him in the shin. Ow. I do one damage.

Tim / GM:

God. It's a bold gambit.

Tara / Journey:

Doran Doran. Animals are not like people.

John / Doran:

What do you mean?

Tara / Journey:

They do not give even half a crap about your words.

John / Doran:

It worked, though.

Maggie / Poppy:

Did it? I think so.

Thomas / Guy:

I think your gambeson was ripped a little bit.

John / Doran:

I couldn't find another one.

Tara / Journey:

They're everywhere.

Maggie / Poppy:

He's got 3 spares.

Hannah / Eryn:

He has a bag of holding he's been secret secretly keeping to us. Gambeson.

Maggie / Poppy:

And he's

Hannah / Eryn:

got 50 gambasins in it.

Tara / Journey:

It's just a whole clothing rack.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh my god.

Tara / Journey:

He stretches the bag sideways and wheels out a wardrobe.

John / Doran:

Well, we're here.

Maggie / Poppy:

Yeah.

John / Doran:

You're welcome.

Maggie / Poppy:

You're so dumb.

John / Doran:

I'm not dumb.

Thomas / Guy:

It worked, Poppy.

Tara / Journey:

That owl thought you were a weird guy. I'm just telling you right now, he did not think you were cool.

Thomas / Guy:

Did the owl say anything about me?

Hannah / Eryn:

No. Can I open this door?

Maggie / Poppy:

You can try. Okay.

Tim / GM:

Do I

Hannah / Eryn:

have to roll

Maggie / Poppy:

something?

Hannah / Eryn:

I'm gonna try to open the door while everyone's talking. Well, investigation. Investigation. Intimidation.

Tara / Journey:

8 18.

John / Doran:

Intimidate the door.

Hannah / Eryn:

18 investigations. You

Maggie / Poppy:

burr. Fucking open up piece

Thomas / Guy:

of shit door.

Tim / GM:

What you find out with an 18 investigation is that this door has no handle.

Hannah / Eryn:

Cool. I tried to kick it.

Tim / GM:

Cool. Kick it.

Maggie / Poppy:

Uh-oh. What

Hannah / Eryn:

do I do? Strength?

Tim / GM:

Yep. So this would be a melee attack, so strength based with proficiency.

Hannah / Eryn:

Oh, dear.

Maggie / Poppy:

Looks like

Thomas / Guy:

a 2 make it Dex. Right?

Tim / GM:

Yes. Could be Dex.

Tara / Journey:

So 6. A plus 3.

Hannah / Eryn:

9. Wait. Bardic info. 11.

Tim / GM:

Great. Alright. You kick the door. Give me a a, a d 4, bludgeoning damage.

Maggie / Poppy:

D 43.

Tim / GM:

And then, add your dexterity to that as well.

Maggie / Poppy:

That makes it 7. He's really intent on how much damage you're doing.

Tim / GM:

Cool. Erin, you take 7 damage.

Hannah / Eryn:

Yes. I'm sorry.

Tim / GM:

Erin, you kick this door and you feel exactly equal force kick you back immediately as you impact, sending you kind of reeling away from it.

Maggie / Poppy:

Ow. Ow. Ow. Fuck. Fuck.

Maggie / Poppy:

Did the door just kick you?

Tim / GM:

Yeah.

Tara / Journey:

I know.

Hannah / Eryn:

You guys don't attack it. It, it seems to bite back.

Thomas / Guy:

They did say no one has seen the witch in quite a while, and she may have some protection sealing her in.

John / Doran:

Well, we're kind of in a hurry. I'm gonna walk up to the door and cast dispel magic on it.

Maggie / Poppy:

Hey. Just bust through everything.

Hannah / Eryn:

Gotta get that donkey to go find her.

John / Doran:

So I have to roll against it if it's higher than a third level spell.

Tim / GM:

Yep. Higher than 3rd level.

John / Doran:

Okay. So the DC is 10 plus the spell's level. I rolled ridiculously high. So

Tara / Journey:

Look at that smile. Trying to keep it cool.

Maggie / Poppy:

Just Oh, I just you know,

Tim / GM:

I rolled another 18.

John / Doran:

I don't know how I'm rolling so many 8. But yeah. Sorry. It's, gonna be a 26. Cool.

Tim / GM:

Doran, all of the magic on you is momentarily dispelled. Ah. You have some magic items which kind of flicker in their connection to you momentarily. It doesn't necessarily negate attunement, but you can feel Ganymede slip away for a second and things like that.

John / Doran:

Okay. That didn't work either.

Thomas / Guy:

Aaron, good call. Maybe Steve will know something about how to get in here.

Tim / GM:

Come to me, Steve.

Tim / GM:

Yes? I've been here the whole time.

Thomas / Guy:

Really?

Tim / GM:

No. I'm joking with you. I've been around.

Thomas / Guy:

Oh, well, as you can see, we are here at the door of Maisie.

Tim / GM:

I can feel it. She's in here for sure.

Thomas / Guy:

This door seems to be blocking our entrance.

Tim / GM:

Yes. I knew we

Tim / GM:

would face such

Tim / GM:

complications. Maisie's a little up her own ass about magic. She's what you call a designer witch. She labors over extremely complicated and convoluted spells for days on end.

Thomas / Guy:

Sounds a bit tiring.

Maggie / Poppy:

Can I arcana check the door? Sure.

Thomas / Guy:

You are arcana checked.

Maggie / Poppy:

Yeah. 25.

Tim / GM:

Hey. Okay. While Guy is communing with Stede here, braying back and forth with copy, You get a read on this door, and it is built to reflect everything, everything at a certain intensity. If you try to inflict something upon it, it will inflict it right back, but not if you're chill about it. I see.

Maggie / Poppy:

I'm I was gonna walk up to the door and, like, taste it.

Tim / GM:

Okay.

Maggie / Poppy:

Yeah. With my Ganymede ability.

Tim / GM:

Okay. You can tell with that additional investigation that exactly one person has been able to get through this door easily. What you can also tell is that there is a little chewed corner of this door that has been slowly, slowly worked away, and small creatures have been able to get through it.

Maggie / Poppy:

Does this look like a push or a pull door?

Tim / GM:

It looks like it would be a push door.

Maggie / Poppy:

Okay. I'm going to slip my finger into the mouse hole

Tim / GM:

k.

Maggie / Poppy:

And pull.

Tim / GM:

Oh, I see. Interesting. Good idea. It does not do anything.

Maggie / Poppy:

Comes.

Tara / Journey:

Journey walks up to it and just places a hand on the door.

Tim / GM:

Okay. Nothing so far.

Tara / Journey:

And then doesn't push with her hand, but starts to walk toward the door with

John / Doran:

her hand on it? Yeah.

Tim / GM:

You bump into the door.

Tara / Journey:

Okay. And if I try to push myself into the door, is there anything?

Tim / GM:

You're just bumping up against the door.

Maggie / Poppy:

K.

Thomas / Guy:

Excuse me, door. Please open.

John / Doran:

Nothing. I thought that was it.

Tim / GM:

Poppy, do you bring the little mouse hole to everyone's attention?

Maggie / Poppy:

Yeah. There's a little mouse hole.

Tim / GM:

You all see a, again, a a tiny, hole in the door big enough for a rat to get through that looks like it had been very slowly eroded by tiny little bites over time. Doran walks away.

Maggie / Poppy:

Doran, if you're going for the owl again, I swear to god.

Maggie / Poppy:

No. No. No.

John / Doran:

Does one person wanna come with me?

Hannah / Eryn:

I'll come.

John / Doran:

Okay. We'll just keep walking until we Yeah. Get real small.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. Yeah. The shrinking effect takes, comes into play just about 10 feet away from that door, actually, as you move back towards the key.

Hannah / Eryn:

Alright. What's the what's the plan?

John / Doran:

I'm going to, cast dimension door. I guess I don't know if we needed to walk far away, but this will work, I think. If I can still see the hole, I'll try to, like, target it

Maggie / Poppy:

Yeah.

John / Doran:

Like, right in there. Yeah. And then hold Aaron's hand and try to walk through this with the spell.

Tim / GM:

Okay. Yeah. That actually pans out.

Tim / GM:

Okay. Yeah.

Tara / Journey:

That's so smart. It's kind

Tim / GM:

of the upper range of what you can do because the relative range of dimension door changes when you shrink. So that 500 feet is very different when you're that small, but you're still within range.

John / Doran:

Okay.

Tim / GM:

You 2 get through.

John / Doran:

Do we just, like, get big as soon as we get through the door then?

Tim / GM:

Yeah. Pretty much. Okay. It's like, I mean, it's not instantaneous. It's still it's like, it takes 2 or 3 seconds for you to get to your full size.

Tim / GM:

But yeah.

Hannah / Eryn:

Doreen, that was so smart. Good job.

John / Doran:

I thought that whole thing was smart too, but that's okay. Wait. Can you Thank you.

Thomas / Guy:

Can you

John / Doran:

hear them in there? Are you in? Oh, yeah.

Tim / GM:

We

Hannah / Eryn:

made it. Doren's a genius. Don't worry about it. I'm gonna try to see if I can open it from this side, and Aaron's gonna try to find a way to hold the door open.

Tim / GM:

Easy as anything. There's a handle on this side and everything. You just pull it right

Maggie / Poppy:

open.

Hannah / Eryn:

Great.

John / Doran:

Cool. Well, everyone. Dora. Thank you.

Maggie / Poppy:

Good job.

Tim / GM:

However, inside is kind of a grim sight. There is a gleaming pink orb of light in the middle of this room. You're in the ground floor of a cylindrical tower, and all around that orb are these black patches about the size and appearance of black melted candles, which seem to have been exploded away from that pink orb in the middle of the room.

Thomas / Guy:

What do you make of this?

Tara / Journey:

I would like to cast Find Traps. Yep.

Tim / GM:

That pink orb in the middle of the room is by definition a trap itself. Touching that pink orb results in a little zappy explode y burst to whoever touches it and kind of pops them away. Surmising this room, you can see all those little black spots. It looks like this pink orb attracts rats and explodes them when they touch it.

Hannah / Eryn:

That's actually really smart. It's a rat zapper.

Tim / GM:

You can also see that the threshold going up to the next floor is also trapped.

Tara / Journey:

Everyone, don't touch that pink orb, and also this doorway seems to be spelled in some way.

Hannah / Eryn:

Is it like the are we, like, in the base of a stairwell, in a tower that goes around, like, a circle going up? Is that, like, the room we're in right now?

Tim / GM:

Yeah. So a circular room, and then, yep, against the far wall, there's like a little doorway and then like a like a circular staircase that goes around, like, the inside wall of this place to spiral upwards.

Maggie / Poppy:

Is it a magic trap?

Tara / Journey:

Yeah.

Maggie / Poppy:

Can I try and check it out again?

Tara / Journey:

Yeah. Okay.

Maggie / Poppy:

That's 25 24.

Tim / GM:

Yikes. My god. Yeah. There's an illusion trap on the stairway.

Maggie / Poppy:

It's

Maggie / Poppy:

an illusion? I don't quite know what else it does.

John / Doran:

Is it going to hurt me if I try to dispel it? It's okay if we find

Maggie / Poppy:

I don't wanna know what the illusion does.

Thomas / Guy:

Why don't we just toss something into it?

Hannah / Eryn:

Why don't we use pinch?

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh, we're gonna pinch.

John / Doran:

At this moment, now

Tim / GM:

that you've been in here for a little while, about 30 seconds or so, you see 5 more of those orbs just kinda spawn randomly around the room. Oh. You need everybody to make a d c 10 dexterity safe to avoid the orbs.

Thomas / Guy:

Go ahead and, add 3 to your safes, please. Mhmm. For

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh, no way.

Thomas / Guy:

For my paladin or That's right.

Tim / GM:

That works on the safes too? I thought that was just, like, courage stuff.

Thomas / Guy:

It's all saving throws.

Tim / GM:

Right? Shit.

John / Doran:

Wow. Super good. 26.

Hannah / Eryn:

12.

Tara / Journey:

25. 22.

Tim / GM:

You're all 5. Okay. Couple of orbs. We're all a lot

Thomas / Guy:

of 8 teens on

John / Doran:

the side of the table.

Hannah / Eryn:

Yeah. I'm rolling very bad tonight.

Tim / GM:

Alright. Okay. You all pass that.

Maggie / Poppy:

I'll send Pynchon.

Tim / GM:

Okay. You send Pynchon to explore the illusionary, stair trap. As soon as he begins to climb the first step, he goes and disappears because all of the stairs are not real.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh. Those aren't real stairs, I guess.

Hannah / Eryn:

Can we still see Pinch?

Tim / GM:

You can't see Pinch anymore because he's disappeared under the stair illusion. You can hear this

John / Doran:

Oh. From the orbs.

Tim / GM:

Come on. From down in the basement. Oh. Oh, no.

Maggie / Poppy:

Can I check-in with him? Sure. Mentally?

Thomas / Guy:

Yeah. You can see through his doe eyes. Right?

Tim / GM:

Yeah. Doe eyes. So Pinch is in a dark room that is filled with a plethora of these pink orbs, maybe 50 to a 100 of them in a constellation around this room. Oh my. What's more, every time he touches one of these pink orbs, he's being jettisoned across the room into another one.

Maggie / Poppy:

I got pink wrong.

Tim / GM:

The danger with these orbs balls. Is that they launch you into other orbs. You can see Peach just, yeah, pinballing around that entire room.

Tara / Journey:

Saw 15 starring Pinch.

Hannah / Eryn:

Yeah. No.

Tara / Journey:

Okay.

Hannah / Eryn:

It goes black. Pinch is dead.

Maggie / Poppy:

A single tear dips down Poppy's face. I think I think I'm gonna have to bring him back tomorrow morning.

John / Doran:

Oh, no.

Tara / Journey:

Can I just look around the flipping room

Maggie / Poppy:

Yeah?

Tara / Journey:

And see, like, how tall things are and, like Yeah.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. There's not honestly a much a lot that you've missed at this point. There's, there's these pink orbs that are spawning by the minute. There's an illusionary stairwell, but there's a door at the top of the stairs as best you can tell. It's just a matter of getting there and not falling into the basement.

Tara / Journey:

How high up is it?

Tim / GM:

Oh, you've got about, like, 15 feet worth of stairs to get up, maybe.

Tara / Journey:

Only 15 feet?

Maggie / Poppy:

Yeah.

Tara / Journey:

Okay. I'm gonna use my vine. Okay. Oh.

Maggie / Poppy:

That's a much better idea. I was thinking we would gather all the orbs from the basement and use them to jettison ourselves off the stairs.

John / Doran:

That's At

Maggie / Poppy:

the risk of our lives.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. How much d ten lightning damage do

Maggie / Poppy:

I take?

Tara / Journey:

Yeah. I I just yeah. I I take out my vine, and I kinda do a little swing and toss it up Yeah. As far as it'll go and then command it to go up to the door.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. Perfect solution. These little sucker pods on your vine kind of reach out and attach themselves to the brick walls of this tower, and it's essentially carrying you up like one of those, you know, when you can't climb stairs anymore and you get one of those motorized chairs that will bring you up the stairs? Mhmm.

Hannah / Eryn:

I'm kinda

Tim / GM:

doing that service for you. Yeah.

Tara / Journey:

Alright, everybody. Come on up.

Tim / GM:

When it gets you to the top of that stairway, however, Jurnee, the door is locked.

Maggie / Poppy:

Time to leave.

Hannah / Eryn:

Can I pick the lock?

Maggie / Poppy:

I'm gonna knock on the door.

Tim / GM:

You get nothing out of the knock after you wait for a couple seconds.

John / Doran:

Oh.

Tim / GM:

But it is just locked.

John / Doran:

You got this, Erin, and I give a bardic inspiration. So you're

Tim / GM:

all being held on to by this vine. You're all being, like, suspended over just Yeah. Empty air. Yeah. And Doran's like

Hannah / Eryn:

Oh, good news. A 3. Oh my banner improvement. Jesus Lord. So that's 8+7.

Hannah / Eryn:

15? Mhmm.

Tara / Journey:

I got a 15. Bad.

John / Doran:

A 15.

Maggie / Poppy:

Mhmm.

Tim / GM:

It gets through this mundane lock.

Hannah / Eryn:

Thanks for the inspiration, Doran.

Tim / GM:

You all hear a satisfying click as the door swings open. And, God, it's nice to solve something by mundane means.

Hannah / Eryn:

It's all I'm good for.

Tim / GM:

When you all pile into this room, getting over those illusionary stairs, you see that there's levers and switches everywhere. It seems to be a control room for the magical effects all around Small Castle. Not

Maggie / Poppy:

again. We're

Hannah / Eryn:

bad with switches and levers.

Tim / GM:

You see 2 control panels here. One holds a brass lever and a cobalt lever. The other set of controls holds a crystal throttle, a bismite throttle, and a ruby red button.

Hannah / Eryn:

I wanna touch it. Yeah. Maybe let's not touch these things initially.

Thomas / Guy:

Is there another door out of here?

Tim / GM:

Yes. Going up.

Hannah / Eryn:

Erin's gonna try to investigate the going up.

Tim / GM:

The door? Yep. K. This one seems locked. Although, potentially, by mundane means, it seems like it has something to do with these levers.

Tara / Journey:

Can you tell me what a throttle is?

Tim / GM:

Yeah. So the difference here, a, a lever is, like, on or off, and and I'm kind of muddying these terms anyway. But a lever in this context means it's either on or off. A throttle means that there's, like, different increments to it. Okay.

Tim / GM:

Like, you can stop it anywhere, and that will do something.

Tara / Journey:

Okay.

Maggie / Poppy:

I would like to actually use my Ganymede ability now.

Tim / GM:

Okay. The taste stuff? Yes.

Maggie / Poppy:

Yeah. Just the air around the first two levers.

Tim / GM:

Okay.

Maggie / Poppy:

Mhmm. I'm not licking them. Yeah. Just sip in the air.

Tim / GM:

You taste icy hot defeat.

John / Doran:

Icy hot.

Maggie / Poppy:

And what color are they?

Tim / GM:

There is a brass lever and a cobalt lever.

Maggie / Poppy:

I think these ones might be hot and or cold.

John / Doran:

What position are they all in right now?

Tim / GM:

The brass lever and cobalt lever are both in the off position. The crystal throttle is about halfway. The bismide throttle is towards the low end, and the ruby red button is unpressed.

John / Doran:

I'm gonna investigate the room, see if there's any notes or anything written down about what these do.

Tim / GM:

Very good. Investigation.

Maggie / Poppy:

There are signs.

Hannah / Eryn:

I'll help I'll help investigate.

John / Doran:

Okay. He's very close to just start pressing Yeah.

Tim / GM:

Doren's, like, about to pull a throttle. He goes, hold on. Like, looks around the room.

Hannah / Eryn:

There's an instruction booklet.

Tim / GM:

Instruction manual.

John / Doran:

Okay. So I got a natural one.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh my god.

Hannah / Eryn:

And then I got a natural twenty.

Tim / GM:

Okay. Right? Yeah. Doran, you are, like, you are scrutinizing this little mark on the floor, and you're just, like, what

Tim / GM:

what is something?

Tim / GM:

Yeah. And it's, like, it's just like a piece of gum stuck on the floor. And meanwhile, Aaron's like, what about this chest? I found the chest. What about the chest?

Tim / GM:

There might be something in the chest.

Hannah / Eryn:

Guys, I found this chest.

Tim / GM:

Well done.

Hannah / Eryn:

Aaron tries to open it.

Tim / GM:

Again, locked. Probably mundane, but locked. There's one thing inside this chest.

Hannah / Eryn:

Poppy, can you check this for for magic?

Tim / GM:

Poppy licks it. Non magical.

Hannah / Eryn:

It's good. I will pick the lock. Tastes like iron.

Tara / Journey:

The way we move through the world is weird. Yeah. Sensory stuff is thrown at me.

Tim / GM:

14. You almost have it, and then your lockpick falls into the chest. And you're like, oh, goddamn it. No.

Hannah / Eryn:

Well, someone else wanna have a go?

Thomas / Guy:

I could try prying it open, perhaps. I'm gonna try jamming my sword in there and Yeah. Giving it a heave ho.

Tim / GM:

Give me a strength check. Athletics.

Thomas / Guy:

26.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. You destroy it, or you destroy the lock, at least. That part of the iron kind of bursts apart, and you open it up to see one small little notebook of the tome in there, of course, detailing the effects of these levers and switches.

Thomas / Guy:

Well, this is out of my wheelhouse.

Tim / GM:

You guys have grown up so much. I love it.

Maggie / Poppy:

What's it say, Eren?

Hannah / Eryn:

What? No. I don't know here.

Maggie / Poppy:

So fucking

Hannah / Eryn:

mean. Bobby. Say dummy.

Tara / Journey:

Idiot, can you read this? Idiot. Oh, you can't?

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh, I'm sorry.

Tara / Journey:

Oh, I'll just read it to you, you

Maggie / Poppy:

big lady. Why don't you let someone who went to school

Hannah / Eryn:

Aaron just sobs in

Maggie / Poppy:

a corner

Hannah / Eryn:

by themselves.

Tim / GM:

There's not even any corners in here.

Thomas / Guy:

She's walking around

Tim / GM:

the walls. Pacing.

Tim / GM:

Yeah. Pacing and crying. You read the details of these switches. The crystal throttle enlarges and reduces the protective sphere around the keep.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh.

Tim / GM:

The bismite throttle raises and lowers the island itself. Woah.

John / Doran:

What? Wow.

Tim / GM:

The ruby red button lights the beacons for distress around the city. K. The brass lever blasts the room with flame

Tim / GM:

Yeah.

Tim / GM:

Disintegrating everyone inside. Yeah. Yeah. The cobalt lever, freezes the room, instantly annihilating anyone inside.

John / Doran:

Mhmm.

Tim / GM:

When pulled together, they unlock the front door with a burst of steam.

John / Doran:

Oh, fuck.

Maggie / Poppy:

The front door?

Tim / GM:

Sorry. The the the door upstairs.

Hannah / Eryn:

Oh, okay.

John / Doran:

So what is what was the last thing you said? I was writing down

Tim / GM:

Yeah.

Tara / Journey:

Both levers.

Tim / GM:

When pulling the brass and cobalt lever together, a burst of steam will open the door to go up the stairs. Got it. Okay.

John / Doran:

Alright. So the whole island can

Thomas / Guy:

be moved from this room?

Maggie / Poppy:

That's really scary and probably too powerful for one person to be responsible for.

Maggie / Poppy:

I

John / Doran:

mean, it's real complex. Slightly down?

Maggie / Poppy:

We're close to the the null mist.

Tim / GM:

The thing is about as low as it can go, almost.

Thomas / Guy:

I fear that trying to move the island might, remove some of the bismide energy that's keeping us afloat.

John / Doran:

Yeah. Let's talk to Maisie as quickly as we can. I'm gonna grab both the brass and cobalt levers and move them in the position that the notebook says to burst up in the door

Tim / GM:

of steam?

John / Doran:

Yep. Okay.

Tim / GM:

Pull them both at the same time. A satisfying burst of steam just kind of throttles that door right open against the wall. Okay. You guys can proceed to the next level. And when you get there, when you're about to reach the 3rd level of this tower, you are greeted by a final door.

Tim / GM:

This one is locked, not by mundane means.

Tara / Journey:

You gotta be kidding me with this tower. What the heck is going on?

John / Doran:

I state has some explaining to do.

Maggie / Poppy:

Who built this? There's too many doors.

Tim / GM:

This door has a small dial on it, a gauge, just a little single needle that is measuring something in the room, and right now it's at 0.

John / Doran:

With my experience talking to Makita and and being in engine rooms, can I try to, like, roll intelligence check to see if I can tell what the gauge is telling us? Sure.

Tim / GM:

Can I

John / Doran:

say it's history, or I don't know what that would mean?

Tim / GM:

I think that's the only thing that really applies. K.

John / Doran:

13.

Tim / GM:

It looks like she used components from what might have been an actual Bismite engine readout, but it isn't measuring any kind of magical read that you can tell. It would have reacted to you approaching. You guys have magic items on you. It would have flickered from that.

Maggie / Poppy:

Can you tell if anyone's in there?

John / Doran:

Try to listen, I guess. A knock on the door. Okay. That works too.

Tim / GM:

Oh, yeah. Nothing comes from that knock.

Tara / Journey:

Why do people have so many dang doors in their houses? What's the freaking point?

Maggie / Poppy:

To keep people out?

Thomas / Guy:

Does your house not have doors?

Tara / Journey:

Not this many. You got one door at the entrance so that you can keep out the heat and the cold during the seasons. And then Sure. Once you're inside, you're in there, and that's where you sit and you eat and you talk and you sleep. Why would you need so many doors?

Maggie / Poppy:

Perhaps it's to keep someone in.

Thomas / Guy:

Or someone out.

Tara / Journey:

All the puzzles are on this side.

John / Doran:

Right. So is there a handle on this or what?

Tim / GM:

There's a

Tim / GM:

handle on this one. Just now you saw the needle flicker a little bit. It bumped, but then it fell back to 0.

Tim / GM:

Oh, what did we just do?

John / Doran:

I I don't know.

Thomas / Guy:

Journey was complaining about the doors.

Tara / Journey:

I'm still pacing around. I pace around, and I'm looking at other stuff. Is there anything else

Thomas / Guy:

I can do? Share more thoughts about doors.

Tara / Journey:

I don't understand. Why would you need to keep so many people in and out? Why don't

Maggie / Poppy:

you just deal

Tara / Journey:

with the problem instead of keeping them

Tim / GM:

Needles not really reacting

John / Doran:

to them.

Thomas / Guy:

It is not a complaint powered door.

John / Doran:

Okay. It's unfortunate. We got plenty of that.

Maggie / Poppy:

Listen if someone's in there.

John / Doran:

I put my ear on the door and try to use my Ganymede ability.

Tim / GM:

Nice. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Cool.

Tim / GM:

Give me, perception with advantage. Right.

John / Doran:

Wow. Okay. Perception is 13. K. Yeah.

John / Doran:

It doesn't take much, Doran. K.

Tim / GM:

If you're on the other side of this door, heavy breathing, this labored person, a woman on the other side is going, come on. Come on. Just work. Why won't you work? Come on.

John / Doran:

We could probably help.

Tim / GM:

Nothing from the needle. Nothing from the person on the other side.

John / Doran:

You sound in distress. I don't blame you. It seems, you got a lot of, uncooperative people at tiny castle here. The person on the

Tim / GM:

other side isn't even pausing. You're not sure they can even hear you. Okay. Well,

John / Doran:

shoot. Someone's there. They're frustrated by something.

Tim / GM:

The needle bounces a little bit.

Tara / Journey:

Is there anything else in this room?

Tim / GM:

You guys are in a a stairwell right now, and the previous room was just that, lever's room.

Maggie / Poppy:

When did the needle bounce this time?

John / Doran:

Something. Say something again. Nothing else in there. Someone. Yeah.

John / Doran:

Door. Nope.

Maggie / Poppy:

Mhmm. Maisie Muldrift.

Tim / GM:

Nothing from that.

Thomas / Guy:

What does it sound like? What's what's happening in there?

John / Doran:

Someone very frustrated by something they're working on

Thomas / Guy:

Is she perhaps trying to cast a spell? Maybe it's powered by simple magic.

John / Doran:

It sounds a lot like we sound every time we try to get through one of these doors.

Maggie / Poppy:

That makes sense. The

Tim / GM:

needle bounces, like, a quarter of the way up and then falls back down.

Maggie / Poppy:

Is it it's just a gauge, or is it

Maggie / Poppy:

an actual dot? I wonder if

Hannah / Eryn:

it's when we laugh.

Tim / GM:

No? The gauge flickers, but it's not really moving. Okay.

Hannah / Eryn:

It's gotta be real laughter.

John / Doran:

Wow. So who has jokes?

Hannah / Eryn:

So that whole family down there, they're named after, you know, body parts. Right? Is that right?

Thomas / Guy:

Oh, I thought they sounded familiar.

Maggie / Poppy:

I thought that's right.

John / Doran:

25%. Okay. So, Princess, Ovarian. Actually, I'm gonna back

Maggie / Poppy:

out of this one. 50%. Just for now. I feel I have made a mistake.

John / Doran:

Didn't like where that was gonna go.

Tim / GM:

50% and climbing.

Maggie / Poppy:

Oh my god. Wait. Wait. Do we all know about do you think the

Hannah / Eryn:

lube barrels were for this family?

Maggie / Poppy:

That would

Hannah / Eryn:

make a lot of sense. Like, that was a shipment.

Tim / GM:

60%.

Thomas / Guy:

Hey, everyone. Remember when Doran pooped his pants?

John / Doran:

None of you noticed. 75. That's all misinformation.

Maggie / Poppy:

Darn, we can smell you.

John / Doran:

What? I that was days ago. I've definitely taken, like, 10 baths since then.

Tara / Journey:

Speaking of why do you guys take so many baths?

Hannah / Eryn:

Well, when you

Maggie / Poppy:

when you pooping your peeve

Tim / GM:

50 5%.

Hannah / Eryn:

What are you doing in

Maggie / Poppy:

the door? If

John / Doran:

you're cold, then down and just see what happens.

Maggie / Poppy:

Did you know

John / Doran:

the door

Maggie / Poppy:

and sleep seemed

Tim / GM:

to be

Maggie / Poppy:

on top of it? 95%. He doesn't wanna share a bed for some reason.

Tara / Journey:

You well, you did put just a curtain between the two halves of the bed. There's plenty of beds in

Maggie / Poppy:

the shed.

John / Doran:

Poppy, if you must know, it has a lot to do with your bedtime ritual.

Maggie / Poppy:

What? My bedtime ritual is no big deal?

John / Doran:

Okay. So Poppy, before going to bed, she, takes out her recipe book, and she reads her recipes out loud and giggles about them.

Maggie / Poppy:

Well, I have to

John / Doran:

make sure they're right. Doran. Doran. You know how old I was when I came up with this recipe? You say, I don't know, Poppy.

John / Doran:

How how old were you? I don't know either, but I love this recipe.

Tara / Journey:

I gotta be honest, Poppy. One time I heard you reading that recipe book to pinch like it was a bedtime story. It's his favorite.

Hannah / Eryn:

He really loves the one about the garlic knots. So spicy.

Maggie / Poppy:

I cannot get him to go to sleep otherwise.

Tim / GM:

It's a shame. The, the noise of your laughter actually covered the sound of the door unlock. It doesn't sound like a 100%.

Hannah / Eryn:

Okay. Now we can go in.

John / Doran:

No. That was fun. Yeah.

Tim / GM:

The door slowly swings open, and you see a room destroyed as if a complicated artist in retreat. This room is filled with destroyed magical objects with colors splattered all over the walls with food left discarded on the floor, with buckets of who knows what in different places. You see Maisie in here, and she is working with a glimmering ball of golden light, and she is trying. She is sweating. She is she is half naked wearing, like, pajama pants and a bra.

Tim / GM:

Like, her hair up in crazy pigtails, half shaved on one side, half colored on the other. She is trying to force a golden ball of magic into a muffin and she goes, come on.

Tim / GM:

Just make it work like that halfling did it.

Maggie / Poppy:

Excuse me?

Tim / GM:

And, she gives up and you see this golden light just explode all over the room and she winces and squints her eyes as she looks at the 5 of you and says, hey, who are you?

Maggie / Poppy:

Hi, I'm Pops.

John / Doran:

The baker?

Maggie / Poppy:

Yeah. Are you Maisie?

Tim / GM:

Yeah.

Maggie / Poppy:

Great.

Thomas / Guy:

Maisie, we have come to rescue you.

Tim / GM:

I don't need rescuing. I need muffins. I think we'll actually end

Maggie / Poppy:

it there. Okay.

Tara / Journey:

I don't need rescuing. I need muffins.

Hannah / Eryn:

Every woman says that. Yeah.

Maggie / Poppy:

Yeah. Truly. Mood.

Tim / GM:

Thank you everyone for listening. I'm Tim, your GM.

Hannah / Eryn:

I'm Hannah playing Aaron.

Tara / Journey:

I'm Tara and I'm Journey.

Thomas / Guy:

Oh, I'm Thomas. I'm Guy.

John / Doran:

I'm John playing Doran.

Maggie / Poppy:

And I'm Maggie, and I'm Poppy Kenmore.

Tim / GM:

Share the show with people you love, and we'll see you next time.