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Megan Jackson, y'all!! Join in the FUN on this one! Part podcast, part coaching session, part therapy. You're gonna want your notebook.
Megan's passion for words drives her as a dynamic force in the creative speaking world, inspiring women, and children to speak with intention and ignite their inner fire. Her acclaimed works, such as the children's book "Words Are Magic" and Culture Cards, demonstrate her dedication to spreading the magic of words to all. Despite her numerous professional roles, including as a writer, producer, TV host, and marketing director, Megan's favorite role is being a wife and mother. With a degree in journalism and an MBA, she is passionate about teaching children the power of words and empowering women to live fulfilling lives.
Megan's passion for words drives her as a dynamic force in the creative speaking world, inspiring women, and children to speak with intention and ignite their inner fire. Her acclaimed works, such as the children's book "Words Are Magic" and Culture Cards, demonstrate her dedication to spreading the magic of words to all. Despite her numerous professional roles, including as a writer, producer, TV host, and marketing director, Megan's favorite role is being a wife and mother. With a degree in journalism and an MBA, she is passionate about teaching children the power of words and empowering women to live fulfilling lives.
Find her on Instagram: @mrsmjofficial
FB: Megan Jackson - https://www.facebook.com/megan.carradine/
Words Are Magic is available at the links above!!! Use the code: "Relational Parenting" to receive a 10% off discount.
Watch us on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@therelationalparentingpodcast/videos
Email us your parenting questions and stories!: jennie@jenniebee.co.
Help us do what we do with a small monthly contribution: https://www.patreon.com/TheRelationalParentCoach/membership
Join the WAITLIST for The Relational Parenting Village! - A New Monthly Membership Program where parents gather for community, growth, accountability and support. PLUS ongoing monthly live events, classes and education resources to keep you motivated and growing on your parenting journey. Let's do this!!
Find me or book a free consult:
Website: https://www.jenniebee.co/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therelationalparentingpodcast/
Facebook https://www.facebook.com/jennifer.hayes.507
TikTok: @therelationalparentcoach.
Sign up for the weekly newsletter here for a weekly parenting tip!
Please leave us a review! Your feedback helps others find us, and helps us grow so we can keep creating content for parents to benefit from.
Happy Parenting and Good Luck Out There!
Help us do what we do with a small monthly contribution: https://www.patreon.com/TheRelationalParentCoach/membership
Join the WAITLIST for The Relational Parenting Village! - A New Monthly Membership Program where parents gather for community, growth, accountability and support. PLUS ongoing monthly live events, classes and education resources to keep you motivated and growing on your parenting journey. Let's do this!!
Find me or book a free consult:
Website: https://www.jenniebee.co/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therelationalparentingpodcast/
Facebook https://www.facebook.com/jennifer.hayes.507
TikTok: @therelationalparentcoach.
Sign up for the weekly newsletter here for a weekly parenting tip!
Please leave us a review! Your feedback helps others find us, and helps us grow so we can keep creating content for parents to benefit from.
Happy Parenting and Good Luck Out There!
Creators & Guests
Host
Jennifer Hayes
Host
Rick Hayes
Guest
Megan Jackson
Megan's passion for words drives her as a dynamic force in the creative speaking world, inspiring women, and children to speak with intention and ignite their inner fire. Her acclaimed works, such as the children's book "Words Are Magic" and Culture Cards, demonstrate her dedication to spreading the magic of words to all. Despite her numerous professional roles, including as a writer, producer, TV host, and marketing director, Megan's favorite role is being a wife and mother. With a degree in journalism and an MBA, she is passionate about teaching children the power of words and empowering women to live fulfilling lives.
NL
Editor
Natalie Long
What is The Relational Parenting Podcast?
Welcome to the Relational Parenting Podcast! I’m Jennifer Hayes – a Parent Coach and 20 year Childcare Veteran. Each week I sit down with my own father (and cohost), Rick Hayes, and discuss the complicated issues that parents face today, as well as some of the oldest questions in the book. From the latest research and the framework of my Relational Parenting Method, we offer thought-provoking solutions to your deepest parenting struggles.
Relational Parenting is an evidence and experience based parenting method created by me - Jennie. After 20 years in the child care world, in every scenario you could possibly imagine, I realized one thing: EVERYONE was prioritizing the behavior and performance of a child over their emotional well-being. This frustrated me to no end and when I re-visited the latest research, I realized there was a better way. I started applying the principles I'd been learning in my own self-work, parent-child relationships, and partnerships, and I started gobbling up all the new research and books I could get my hands on. When I saw the results of putting these practices into play with the children I was taking care of - the difference in myself AND the kids I worked with was ASTOUNDING.
I am SO PROUD to be presenting Relational Parenting to the world. I can't wait to hear about your own journey. From Parents-to-be to the seasoned parenting veteran - there's something here for everyone!
Jennifer Hayes (00:01.010)
But just our last episode, episode 13, was just me and dad, and we had done a whole education series. So it was our first episode that was just me and him after six episodes or something, six or seven episodes. And I was just like, we're going to try something new, and I'm going to hit record right now. And then it was like half of that episode was him checking on me for my post-COVID stuff. And it ended up actually relating to…
Megan Jackson (00:24.808)
at all.
Jennifer Hayes (00:30.058)
some of the responses that I got online from that really angry post that I posted. Yeah, I was like, I was just so frustrated and so like just lost in the darkness. Yeah, but I got like, I literally had one or two that I've deleted because I purposefully did not want anyone to like feel bad after that episode came out. But,
Megan Jackson (00:35.040)
Yeah, yeah, I remember.
Papa Rick (00:42.855)
Like, are you okay? Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (00:58.046)
I got a DM specifically that was like, keep your head up. You're going to be okay or something. It was very encouraging, but simultaneously dismissive. I was just frustrated.
Megan Jackson (01:06.568)
Hmm.
Megan Jackson (01:12.346)
Yeah?
Papa Rick (01:17.263)
which did not sit well with her. Sorry.
Megan Jackson (01:20.752)
When you say dismissive, what do you mean?
Jennifer Hayes (01:24.642)
Dismissive of how I was feeling, of me being allowed to have negative feelings, you know, and have a moment of despair and frustration. Like, and so anyway, I ranted about that a little bit and actually ended up, I was like, oh, this is actually what I do with relational parenting is I teach parents how to not be dismissive of their children's experience. Even if you, the experienced adult, are looking at a situation and it's like,
Megan Jackson (01:26.920)
Okay, yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:30.511)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:34.223)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:47.876)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:54.882)
the blue cup, not the green cup. It's not a big deal, but to your two-year-old, it's the worst thing that's ever happened to them. Yeah. So it ended up being, it ended up turning into an episode and I left it all together and I was like, I texted my editor, I was like, I'm so sorry, but this is a two and a half hour episode. And I only cut out about 30 minutes of it. So it's gonna be a really long one. But.
Megan Jackson (01:55.835)
Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (02:00.036)
Absolutely, yeah, I kind of know about that, yeah. Ha ha ha.
Megan Jackson (02:17.648)
Wow.
Papa Rick (02:21.739)
Oh my.
Jennifer Hayes (02:24.674)
It was actually, it was almost three hours. It was two hours and 51 minutes and I cut, I got it down to a two hour episode.
Megan Jackson (02:32.069)
Wow.
Papa Rick (02:34.099)
Oh my, I better go listen to that one. We were, we were pretty freewheeling on that one.
Jennifer Hayes (02:34.754)
So.
Jennifer Hayes (02:39.274)
We were, it was good though. We had, we made lots of good observations.
Megan Jackson (02:41.340)
I was about to say that's when the magic picks in. It's like when you are just conversing and just, you know what I'm saying, just living.
Jennifer Hayes (02:51.362)
So that's what I'm trying to do more of versus, you know, we just started in January, so I'm still brand new podcaster. And I, you know, I'm still finding my groove and what I want the sound to be like and whatever. And so the last one, I was just like, we're just gonna see what happens. I didn't pick a topic, I didn't pick anything. And then he asked me about that post and it just turned into its own topic. It was great.
Papa Rick (02:51.491)
Let the-
Megan Jackson (03:00.285)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (03:18.540)
Yeah, I saw the post. I think I commented too. I was like sending me love or something. I can't remember but Yeah, I remember that
Jennifer Hayes (03:23.934)
Yeah, you were very sweet, yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (03:29.734)
Um, I think sometimes it's like, I don't, one, I'm terrible at social media. Two, I rarely post negative stuff. Um, it's usually like educational or like a picture of me and my husband doing something. Um, so I think when I posted that some people were like,
Megan Jackson (03:39.245)
Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (03:50.444)
Oh my god, she's a human.
Jennifer Hayes (03:53.615)
Right? How dare you!
Megan Jackson (03:54.540)
Yeah, yeah, it's...
Papa Rick (03:56.679)
She's a human, but she doesn't show it very often. So are you okay? Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha.
Megan Jackson (04:00.448)
Yeah, yeah, I think it's fair though.
Jennifer Hayes (04:01.534)
Yeah. Well, maybe that's my problem. Maybe that's the problem. I should be more, I need to be more, I don't know, present. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (04:09.276)
Transparent maybe?
Papa Rick (04:10.659)
It's not, it's, it's nothing wrong with you, but that's not what you do on like Facebook. You know, Facebook is all smiles and sunshine, rainbows and unicorns.
Jennifer Hayes (04:15.627)
now.
Jennifer Hayes (04:20.142)
I follow a lot of accounts though that have like really like the purpose of their account is to bring forward the reality of life. And I love those accounts and I'm like, oh, maybe that's what I should I should stop being worried or whatever and just post whatever the fuck I want.
Megan Jackson (04:26.724)
Mmm.
Megan Jackson (04:35.780)
And you know, the truth of the matter is too, people want authenticity. Like it's not all about, you know, rainbows and unicorns. Actually last week I had posted, um, I can't remember exactly what it was, but it was like, some days I just want to quit, you know, and there are, there are certain things that I try to shift myself to remember, uh, one scripture that kept coming to my mind was like, the race is not given to the swift or the strong, but to the one who endures until the end.
Papa Rick (04:37.024)
Absolutely.
Jennifer Hayes (04:40.738)
Mm-hmm.
Jennifer Hayes (04:52.276)
Yes.
Papa Rick (04:52.656)
Yeah. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (05:04.528)
And so that was something that I, yeah, I just kept reminding myself, but let's just be for real. I was like, yo, it's so much easier sometimes it feels like to just forget it, you know? And I got DMs too, Jen, where it was like, are you okay? Yeah, I'm fine, I'm just a human, you know? So yeah, I'm telling you.
Jennifer Hayes (05:04.818)
Mm-hmm. I saw that.
Jennifer Hayes (05:16.343)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (05:16.603)
Hahaha
Jennifer Hayes (05:22.919)
Right? Like do you not have bad days? Like are you just wandering around suppressing everything? And they are.
Megan Jackson (05:29.964)
Yeah. And it's like, yo, let's, I think though, um, doing that helps others see, you know, I can relate to this. Cause I did get some like that too, that was like, girl, I'm in it too, you know, praying for you, we're in this together. It's just a beautiful thing. I say keep posting whatever the heck you want to post. And uh, yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (05:40.374)
Yeah. Yes.
Papa Rick (05:48.427)
I do too. I think it's the evolution of social media, you know, every, all the, especially young kids, you know, they see everybody being perfect and are, why am I not perfect? They don't realize, but even if you realize, it's not necessarily healthy to only, you know, it's like, uh, like going to church and everybody's, everybody's putting you all dressed up and got their best face on. And, and when you look at people and they're not looking, they're like crying. And you know, it's like,
Jennifer Hayes (05:48.747)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (05:57.362)
Mm-hmm.
Jennifer Hayes (05:59.058)
Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (06:08.067)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (06:13.464)
Yeah, yeah, or broken, yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (06:15.170)
Right. Yeah.
Papa Rick (06:16.823)
You know, just let me know and we can talk and let's be human beings. And it's so if a little bit of authenticity gets inserted into social media, that's not a bad thing. That's, that's, that's an evolution in the right direction.
Megan Jackson (06:26.712)
I agree, thousand percent. Absolutely, absolutely.
Jennifer Hayes (06:35.334)
I, um, damn it. I had a thing. Oh, so the other thing that we did on the last episode was I just kind of on a whim announced that we were going to start a Patreon and a membership. I'm looking at doing a membership instead of. Yeah. Um, so, so far my dad is our only Patreon supporter.
Megan Jackson (06:51.368)
Ayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
Papa Rick (06:51.375)
Monetized baby, monetized.
Papa Rick (06:59.172)
Oh, am I the only one so far?
Megan Jackson (07:00.579)
Okay.
Jennifer Hayes (07:02.622)
That's okay.
Papa Rick (07:04.867)
Good. That means I'm your founding. You know, I'm like, what do they call it? I'm the first one in the pool. I'm a founder, you know?
Jennifer Hayes (07:08.286)
You are. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (07:09.244)
Solid rock, yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (07:13.070)
Um, but I, but with the Patreon thing, I was like, maybe we like, we'll start doing a bloopers reel or whatever, you know, cause like there's different tiers and you know, the first tier is like, you get a shout out second tier. I was like, I don't know what we're going to do yet, but maybe like a bloopers reel, maybe start like sending out some relational parenting merch, like, I don't know, but, um, it's just funny that we hop on here and you're like, do a bloopers reel. Yeah. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (07:26.597)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (07:35.608)
We gotta figure out promotion.
Megan Jackson (07:36.588)
I love it. Yeah, confirmation.
Megan Jackson (07:41.915)
Awesome.
Jennifer Hayes (07:43.314)
So great. Well, okay, Megan, welcome to the podcast. We can dive in. I never know how to start these things. I did, I got to read the PDF today of your book, Words Are Magic. So you are a children's book author, which is like, and this book was when you and I talked on the phone.
Megan Jackson (07:48.442)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (08:02.108)
Yeah, awesome.
Jennifer Hayes (08:12.010)
like what a month or two ago now. And you told me about that. And you told me about the inspiration behind the book. I was just like tapping my fingers, just waiting. And then you, and I pre-ordered and I was like, get it. And then I asked you, like, is it gonna be here before? And you're like, no, but I'll send you the, I'll send you the PDF so you can read it before. And I did. And it's so good. And it's the artwork is so beautiful. Oh my gosh. Everything.
Megan Jackson (08:13.441)
Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (08:31.204)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (08:34.856)
Thank you. Yeah, isn't it? So I'm glad that you asked. The individual that did the illustrations, she wants to remain anonymous. So what we did, right, adds another element there. So what we did was just put it under right publishing house illustrations and we put that inside the beginning piece of it since it's an employee of, so yeah.
Papa Rick (08:40.135)
Who did the illustrations?
Jennifer Hayes (08:51.005)
Mmm!
Jennifer Hayes (08:53.922)
Mm-hmm.
Papa Rick (09:04.723)
Okay, I see, okay.
Megan Jackson (09:04.964)
Yeah. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (09:05.066)
Oh, interesting. Well, her work is gorgeous. So tell us, tell everyone what all the things that you do, because you do so many beautiful things and how you came to be a children's book author.
Megan Jackson (09:10.236)
Thank you.
Megan Jackson (09:28.164)
Yeah, absolutely. So you're right. I wear a lot of hats. So, uh, the most important hat I wear, I'm a wife and I'm a mommy, two little boys. I call them world changers, Ellis and Ezra. Ellis is three. Ezra is one. Ezra just started walking and my nerves are all over the map. Okay. Trying to keep up with those two. Yeah. It is.
Jennifer Hayes (09:52.784)
Two walkers.
Papa Rick (09:53.367)
It's much simpler when they're not mobile. Yeah. Wait.
Megan Jackson (09:54.852)
Oh my gosh, like, you know, you say, oh, I want him to walk, and then one said, oh my gosh, it's something to behold, so.
Jennifer Hayes (10:02.158)
You're like, quit touching everything!
Papa Rick (10:04.291)
Wait, wait till they climb. Wait till they can scale the counter and the shelves and the pantry. And yeah.
Megan Jackson (10:07.136)
we're there. Yeah, we're there little acrobats. Yeah, it's something else. So that's that is my greatest hat that I wear, greatest title. I am also a author, as you mentioned, I'll share a little bit more about that. I am an entrepreneur, my husband and I have a children's clothing brand called Kid Clothier, where that focuses on
Jennifer Hayes (10:09.806)
I was gonna say already, yeah. Yeah.
Papa Rick (10:13.287)
It's amazing.
Papa Rick (10:18.479)
Hahaha.
Megan Jackson (10:33.532)
the importance of building self-confidence from the inside out. So not just about what you wear, like, yeah, that's cool. We do want to look good, but it's about feeling good too. So every element of my life and my world is really geared towards empowerment of children and just teaching. Like for real, you really do have everything you need inside of you, you know? I know that looking cool is the thing and we wanna look cool, but.
you're cool because you're you, you know what I mean? And that sounds so like cliche, but it's legit. There is no one else on this planet that has your DNA. You know what I mean? And so that is really the premise of who I am. And of course I was talking about the book, Words Are Magic, that I always, I had told you Jen, it was like a God thing. I was pregnant with my son.
Jennifer Hayes (11:08.461)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (11:12.226)
Yes.
Megan Jackson (11:27.252)
and Papa Rick, you don't know this, I was pregnant with my son and we were flying back from Europe and I woke up and like, you know, when you're pregnant, you just, you sleep all the time and the sleep is deep, okay? So I woke up from a deep sleep and I just felt like this heavy thing on me that was like the power of words, the power of words. And I'm like, okay, what about it? You know what I mean? So I took it and wrote it in my notes section.
Jennifer Hayes (11:40.342)
Hehehehe.
Megan Jackson (11:55.036)
and really didn't think a whole lot about it. That was 2019, ended up of course having Ellis, my oldest son, 2020 hit and y'all know it went just psychotic. Kobe Bryant died and that was when I realized I was going through postpartum, right? So when Kobe Bryant died, I was a big fan of Kobe, but you would have thought it was like my brother, my cousin. Like it was, I was,
Jennifer Hayes (12:08.860)
Uh huh.
Papa Rick (12:12.379)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (12:16.994)
Hmm.
Papa Rick (12:17.415)
I don't know.
Megan Jackson (12:24.264)
just grieving really, really bad. And my husband, it was so bad. It was so bad. But I didn't realize that, you know, this was also postpartum, you know what I'm saying? So it was a whole lot at one time. And my husband was like, remember you said you were gonna write a book, you know? Why don't you write the book? And I thought, okay, that'll, you know, give me something else to do. And then the George Floyd thing hit, Breonna Taylor. Like it just kept getting.
Jennifer Hayes (12:24.676)
Mmm.
Jennifer Hayes (12:27.907)
That was a heart- that was a heart-breaking- oh my god, awful.
Papa Rick (12:46.787)
There you go.
Jennifer Hayes (12:53.482)
everything that year. My God.
Megan Jackson (12:53.816)
Yes, the perfect, oh my God. Like you can't even write, like it's nuts. I'll say this, Ellis's baby book is like a historical document of anything crazy that could have happened, okay? Just nuts. Every time I would go back to the book, I'm like, this is crazy. This is nuts, you know?
Papa Rick (12:55.623)
Perfect storm, timing and circumstance and yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (12:59.427)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (13:08.091)
Hahaha
Jennifer Hayes (13:11.081)
Oh my god.
Papa Rick (13:11.124)
Hahaha
Jennifer Hayes (13:15.790)
Right?
Papa Rick (13:16.859)
That's why you can never prepare for life is because it just happens, you know, and there's no, there's no getting ready for things. You just have to, you know,
Megan Jackson (13:20.000)
It just happens. Oh my gosh. And 2020 was just whatever. Okay. So anyway, I'm going through, I'm trying to figure out what am I going to write? And this phrase came to me and it was say what you have and you'll have what you say, you have just what you need to find your way. And I thought, Ooh, that's catchy. So I wrote it down and I couldn't did. Yeah. It was so catchy. And.
Jennifer Hayes (13:21.442)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (13:29.678)
Thanks for watching!
Jennifer Hayes (13:38.734)
Hmm.
Papa Rick (13:41.755)
Hahaha.
Jennifer Hayes (13:42.670)
I wrote it down too. I was like, we gotta talk about this.
Megan Jackson (13:49.952)
y'all, I tried so hard to come up with the rest of the book after that, right? Cause I was like, Ooh, I got that. Let's go. Let's go. I knew that he was going to go to sleep and wake up in the middle of nowhere. Right. And so I'm like, I know that he needs to use the power of his words to get back home. I just, it wasn't piecing together. So I left it. I was like, whatever, you know, this, it'll come back to me when the time is right. A year went by. Um, what was that? 2020 we were in 2021, the end.
Jennifer Hayes (13:55.820)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (13:58.218)
the rest.
Jennifer Hayes (14:02.146)
Mmm.
Papa Rick (14:02.714)
Okay.
Jennifer Hayes (14:09.697)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (14:11.716)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (14:15.135)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (14:19.820)
started writing a little bit again, got the beginning half, stopped writing again, because if it wasn't flowing, I didn't want to force it. So I was like, you know, it'll, yeah, it'll come. 2022 rolls around and I'm talking to my brother and he was like, you know, you had mentioned a children's book and I said, yeah, you know, and I told him the phrase, say what you have, you'll have what you say and he was like, yo, that's good.
Jennifer Hayes (14:28.182)
Yeah, in the same way.
Megan Jackson (14:46.500)
And I said, it is pretty good, huh? And he's like, you got to finish it. And so y'all, I kid you not. So I live in Fort Worth. Dallas is about an hour drive on the way to a party, headed to Dallas. I was like, all right, Lord, let's write the book, right? I get my little notepad out and my fingers are going and it's flowing out of me. And so we get to Dallas and I said, Adam, which is my husband, I said, I wrote the book. And he's like, girl, you ain't write no book in an hour. Like there ain't no way.
Jennifer Hayes (14:47.498)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (14:49.607)
Hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe
Megan Jackson (15:15.972)
And I was like, no, for real. Yes. I was like, it does. It flows out of you. And I was like, I'm for real. I wrote the book. And so he's like, all right, you know, we go to the party. I'm like beaming because I'm like, yo, it's done. It's done. And yes. It was to the, yes. That's exactly it. I just gave birth. Yeah, that's so funny because that's exactly how it was. And I knew the test would be.
Jennifer Hayes (15:17.230)
That's how it happens! Oh my god.
Papa Rick (15:19.163)
A lot of stuff happens that way.
Jennifer Hayes (15:30.910)
Yeah. You're like glowing. No one knows. You're like, I just birthed something.
Papa Rick (15:35.494)
He just gave birth to it, yeah. Oh, you gotta glow up, Hatcha!
Jennifer Hayes (15:40.174)
I'm sorry.
Megan Jackson (15:46.040)
sharing it with my girlfriend, Tanisha, who is, she's an SVP at a corporate org at the time. Now she's doing her own thing. I mean, she's just a boss, right? And she's so intentional and honest. And so I was like, I'm gonna let Tanisha read this. And she's just, you know, she's gonna tell me if it's okay or you need to do this. And she read it and she called me. She was like, Megan.
you gotta do it, you gotta get it out. You gotta get the right artists, you gotta get the right promotions, like you gotta go full fledged with this. And so between her and my family, you know, you need good people around you that's gonna be honest and be like, girl, now this ain't good, or you know, you got something. And it was one of those. And yeah, we got going and Jen, you and I talked and I was like.
Jennifer Hayes (16:28.175)
Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (16:39.416)
let's, let's do it. You know, let's go ahead. And by the way, you were one of the first to buy the book. So shout out to you. Yes. I think you were number two. I was like, come on, Jennifer.
Jennifer Hayes (16:42.583)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (16:45.738)
Really?
Jennifer Hayes (16:50.190)
I saw the post and I was like, finally! Click. Ha ha ha ha ha.
Papa Rick (16:50.736)
Naked.
Megan Jackson (16:53.922)
Yes! So yeah, yeah, that's how I came to be.
Papa Rick (16:54.023)
Hahaha!
Jennifer Hayes (16:59.518)
Oh, yay. Well, congratulations, first of all. It's so exciting. And it's also like, like birthing something, writing something like that. And then like, you waited, you waited, you had this like two year like, like just surrendering, you know, to the right time. And then you're like, all right, I'm ready. And then in an hour, it was just boom, it was down.
Papa Rick (17:01.147)
Very cool.
Megan Jackson (17:02.024)
Thank you. Thank you.
Megan Jackson (17:06.138)
I appreciate it.
Papa Rick (17:08.667)
So you're busy.
Megan Jackson (17:19.107)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (17:24.263)
Boom.
Jennifer Hayes (17:26.022)
And then you walk into this party and it's one thing to be like to like feel all that joy and excitement of like, I just created this thing that I've been wanting to create. And it's a whole other ballgame to actually show it to someone else, no matter how like trusted or loved or and so to put it out in the world and then there's I mean, I don't even want to like I don't have the brain space to ever dive into
Megan Jackson (17:33.500)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (17:38.509)
Yeah, yeah.
Megan Jackson (17:43.117)
It's so true.
Jennifer Hayes (17:54.174)
what it takes to actually get something published too. Cause then there's grit to get through that.
Megan Jackson (17:56.013)
Yeah. Yeah.
Papa Rick (17:58.667)
Oh yeah, there must be such a galette, yeah.
Megan Jackson (17:59.960)
Yeah. So I'm glad you brought that up. Like even to that piece of my brother and I own a publishing company. That's another hat, uh, which is called right publishing house. And so we were going back and forth and doing the, you know, making sure that the print looked like top tier, right? Cause the artwork is so beautiful and I didn't want it to get lost in, you know, just the regular mundane looking type of printing. So, I mean, even to that piece, but.
Jennifer Hayes (18:09.930)
Hehehehe
Papa Rick (18:10.201)
Okay.
Jennifer Hayes (18:19.980)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (18:22.498)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (18:28.331)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (18:30.056)
It's grown so many legs y'all from cells in China, West Africa, the UK. We've gotten, I got a DM the other day where someone is psychologist. She's like, hey, one of my clients, they're having a youth camp and there's 2000 kids. We want to buy your book. And is there a way you could come and do an author reading? Like it's blowing up right before my eyes. And I know though, it's...
Papa Rick (18:55.012)
Wow.
Megan Jackson (18:57.196)
It's the message, the power of language. Like, you know what I'm saying? It's so important to be intentional with your words and to teach these babies while they're young. You know what I mean?
Jennifer Hayes (18:59.934)
Mm-hmm. Yes.
Papa Rick (19:00.623)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (19:09.163)
I like the part of the book, I mean, the child wakes up and he's alone and depending upon what's within, right? And you got to reach in stuff that parents have, you know, the influence of the parents prior to that happening to him. It's so important, right? You know, yeah, it's a great, and that kind of story I would think would translate into all kinds of stuff, transfer into things.
Megan Jackson (19:13.612)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (19:17.128)
Dooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Megan Jackson (19:26.136)
Yes. Yes.
Megan Jackson (19:34.392)
I love that you said that, Papa Rick, because I didn't even actually zone into that piece. But it's so, yeah, I mean, you're a dad, so absolutely. You know what I'm saying? But it's so true because it gives the ownership to parents to ensure that, hey, this is intentional parenting here. We are creating the next generation. What is it that?
Papa Rick (19:46.027)
That's just what struck me when I read it.
Jennifer Hayes (19:53.398)
Yes.
Jennifer Hayes (19:58.476)
Yes.
Papa Rick (19:59.043)
Yes. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (20:02.948)
We want our babies to be around. What is it that we want them to see? We want them to fulfill whatever it is they were created to be, you know? And you've got to be intentional. So I love that you said that, yeah.
Papa Rick (20:09.957)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (20:12.539)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (20:15.991)
Yeah, traditional parenting, you know, the dad, the dad role is about provision and, and preparation, you know, want to make you rugged and, and so, you know, be, be competent at things. And so that, I mean, that's, that's just what jumped out at me at that is, hey, that kid, that kid got thrown into the dark alone and he was okay, you know, that's for what you need and you're fine. You know, that's, that's a perfect story. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (20:24.194)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (20:30.885)
I love that.
Megan Jackson (20:37.516)
Yeah, oh I love that. That's so good, so good. Thank you very much. Yeah.
Papa Rick (20:45.699)
You bet, you bet.
Jennifer Hayes (20:46.542)
That's a huge message in this book that, like it's, a big message is that like he uses his words to find his way home, right? To create his reality. So there's these, so there's, whether you call it prayer or manifestation or affirmations, like there's lots of.
Megan Jackson (21:00.388)
Yeah, yeah.
Papa Rick (21:01.452)
Manifest stuff, yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (21:11.490)
things to call it, but basically taking that power, trusting yourself and creating your reality. But then there it does, it puts the onus back on parents and that's also something that we talk about in relational parenting, which is part of why I was so excited for this book, because I was like, we are so aligned, is that your voice, the parent, your voice literally becomes
Papa Rick (21:13.661)
Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (21:27.549)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (21:28.240)
That's right.
Megan Jackson (21:32.998)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (21:40.286)
your child's inner voice and how they talk to themselves and the stories that they believe about themselves. And so throughout this book, the little boy is remembering words that have been spoken to him. And that is what gives him the inner strength. And he goes, oh yeah, I can do that. Oh yeah, I do have that. Right?
Megan Jackson (21:41.105)
Oh.
Papa Rick (21:42.915)
Yeah. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (21:52.997)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (21:57.092)
Yes, that's it.
Megan Jackson (22:02.988)
Absolutely, absolutely. And then to that point, I think what I love as well as as he is saying these things, you've got the parents voice that's reiterating. That's right, baby, you can do it. That's right. You know, you use your mind and, you know, just to give that additional, Jenny, just what you were saying, like the relational parenting piece, when you and I talked, I was like, you know, and I'm going to say it again, I'm like, this podcast is going to go far.
Jennifer Hayes (22:07.214)
I love it.
Jennifer Hayes (22:19.051)
Mm-hmm.
Papa Rick (22:20.228)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (22:32.540)
Like it really is, you know, the Bible talks about don't despise small beginnings, you know, because that's just what it is. It's the beginning, but it's going to go far in that there are parents like myself, like you Papa Rick, there are parents that believe in you, Jenny, who even stepped out on faith to say, you know, I'm going to do this podcast because I believe that there is a message that must go forth with relational parenting.
Jennifer Hayes (22:35.239)
Mm.
Jennifer Hayes (22:42.071)
No.
Jennifer Hayes (22:56.354)
Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (23:02.336)
I'm so passionate when it comes to what we speak, how we parent, what we do, because it makes a huge impact on not just your child, but the other children out there. We don't live in a bubble, so they're going to be out there with other children. So, yeah, I think just being intentional is just so important and remembering that.
Jennifer Hayes (23:18.838)
Yeah, right.
Papa Rick (23:24.853)
Exactly.
Megan Jackson (23:31.064)
Our babies are a gift, you know, they're a gift. Yeah.
Papa Rick (23:34.151)
Yeah. And it's our, and our responsibility too. It's our job. They've been placed with us to prepare them or their future, you know, for the first few years and yeah, it goes both. It goes both ways. That one of the last two podcasts we did, we were kind of talking about the mission, you know, and how it's, you know, it's, uh, it's not about us. It's about, it's about serving a purpose. It's about, let's get the word out there.
Megan Jackson (23:40.198)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (23:51.057)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (23:57.116)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (23:59.979)
along with other people. I think that's happening more and more. Part of that authenticity and social media thing, you know, it's not just being influencers and, you know, look at the jeans I'm wearing, but something useful out there. You too, let's go have a beer, let's say, that risk is all over. It's too bad we're everywhere in the world talking to each other, you know?
Megan Jackson (24:05.252)
Absolutely.
Megan Jackson (24:10.892)
Yes, yes Papa Rick you are really cool. I like you. I want to hang out with Papa Rick.
Jennifer Hayes (24:13.005)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (24:15.960)
Ehh
Jennifer Hayes (24:20.960)
Okay.
Megan Jackson (24:23.583)
Yeah. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (24:25.006)
No, okay, but you're in Fort Worth. You're in Fort Worth. My brother is in the Dallas area towards Fort Worth. Okay, for me. So like we could legit meet up sometime because we're down. I mean, I'm down there like once a year, but like, I could totally hit you up and be like, we can go get coffee. I can meet your kids. I just remembered something. The illustration of the child in the book looks just like your oldest.
Papa Rick (24:29.251)
Yeah. Other side of Dallas, Fourney. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (24:30.680)
Okay, nice, yeah I know where that is, morning, uh-huh.
Megan Jackson (24:37.505)
Yo, it-
Papa Rick (24:39.663)
That would be too cool.
Megan Jackson (24:41.137)
Let me know. Let's do it.
Papa Rick (24:45.471)
Oh man.
Megan Jackson (24:53.696)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Little Ellis. So it's so funny because I was going back and forth if I wanted to do that because I didn't want people to get hung up on like, oh, it's a story about Ellis, you know? And I'm like, no, not really. It's, you know, like the premise, I took Ellis because I wanted to be able to one, let my son see himself. So like I have the book here.
Jennifer Hayes (24:54.974)
I'm assuming that's not an accident. So cute. So cute. Yeah. I'm so excited.
Papa Rick (24:55.431)
Oh, does it really? That's a cute little kid. I wondered if there was a model when I saw it.
Megan Jackson (25:22.120)
And I, so the first time I read it to Ellis, yeah, look. So the first time I read it to Ellis, I said, you know, can you see it? Left, okay.
Jennifer Hayes (25:23.754)
Yeah, show everybody. Show it off.
Jennifer Hayes (25:28.866)
slide it slide it to your left your other way. Sorry. I don't know. There it is. Yes.
Megan Jackson (25:35.388)
Can y'all see it? It probably is. Yeah. Thank you so much. So I had shown it to Ellis and I was like, we're gonna read a book. And I said, who is that? He said, that's Ellis. And I said, that is, that's Ellis. But the funny thing is, is as I was showing it even at the different like places that I go to read, the kids see themselves. It's like...
Papa Rick (25:36.459)
unless your video is flipped. I'm still getting the hang of that. That's gorgeous.
Jennifer Hayes (25:42.094)
Gorgeous.
Jennifer Hayes (25:59.690)
Yeah. Yes. Yeeees.
Megan Jackson (26:00.596)
Oh, that's me or that you know what I mean? So it's not even necessarily like, oh, that's specifically Ellis. That is your child. That is the white child, the Hispanic child. That is the Asian child. That is just a, you know, it's just an image. This is every child. You know what I mean? Yes.
Jennifer Hayes (26:10.092)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (26:10.969)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (26:21.071)
This is a real child. Yeah, it doesn't, it doesn't, it's not a caricature of a kid. It looked like a real, somebody's child.
Jennifer Hayes (26:21.422)
Yes. Yes.
Megan Jackson (26:25.564)
That's it. This is a real baby and it's your baby. It's any parent who has a child who, you know, they wanna teach, which hopefully every child, I mean, every parent wants to be able to just instill that in them to say, hey, you know, every single thing that you need is inside of you. So yeah, yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (26:49.846)
Yes. How did you, let's see. What is the question I want to ask here? So have you always believed in the power of words or was it something that you sort of like healed into or discovered as an adult?
Megan Jackson (27:12.444)
Oh, oh my gosh, that wow, healed into, oh, that was good, yeah. Man, cause that is so good. Yeah, I do too, I'm gonna take that too. I'll give you credit though. But I'm gonna say healed into. So.
Papa Rick (27:17.351)
Hmm. Hmm. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Jennifer Hayes (27:20.650)
Right? Right? Right? Speaking from experience, I healed into a lot of my beliefs.
Papa Rick (27:28.219)
That's something you peeled into. I like that phrase.
Jennifer Hayes (27:34.876)
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Jennifer Hayes (27:41.174)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (27:41.260)
My both of my parents are pastors, they're ministers and they are the type that live what they preach. They don't, you know, get on the pulpit and say one thing, but then come home and live another. So I was very privileged because I saw that that wasn't always the case. You know what I mean? And so I was privileged to have parents who did speak life into us.
Jennifer Hayes (27:44.974)
Mm-hmm.
Papa Rick (27:45.815)
Oh, boy.
Jennifer Hayes (27:51.829)
Great.
Papa Rick (27:56.487)
That's a good thing, yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (27:56.566)
Mm-hmm.
Jennifer Hayes (28:03.210)
Yeah. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (28:09.152)
and they were intentional. You know, we never got called stupid, shut up, none of that, you know, they were just very loving. And so, but I still didn't learn that intentionality of, you know, watching what I say, you know, cause I would still say any kind of thing and move on, you know, and it wasn't until college that I was in one of the darkest places in my life.
Jennifer Hayes (28:16.333)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (28:16.593)
Wow.
Jennifer Hayes (28:28.174)
Hmm
Jennifer Hayes (28:32.299)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (28:38.216)
And my mentor at the time, she has since passed, she's passed away now, but my mentor at the time, she started talking to me about my language. And she was like, everything you just said was negative, everything. And she's like, I'm not telling you that in a judgy way. I'm telling you that because you're living what you're saying, you know? Yeah. And I remember when she said it, it...
Papa Rick (29:01.415)
Just an observation, yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (29:01.843)
Yeah. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (29:05.616)
First of all, I didn't even notice because I was just so used to humdrum, you know? And she put me on this exercise where she's like, I want you to speak positively for the next seven days because we would meet weekly. And she's like, only speak life. And that's what she would call it, only speak life. And when I tell y'all it was so hard, like it was so difficult, yes. But it was the best.
Papa Rick (29:24.783)
Be client.
Jennifer Hayes (29:24.791)
life.
Jennifer Hayes (29:27.586)
Hehehehehehe
Papa Rick (29:28.195)
Yeah, the sensor. Yeah, yeah.
Megan Jackson (29:35.748)
like exercise I could have ever done because there is a mindset shift that happens when you begin, and I like to say speak life, when you begin to speak positive and speak life, there's a mindset shift. And as I began to speak life, and I would actually intentionally take the word of God and say what he says to help me see who I am. And that's why I love that you said healing. Yeah. And it, yeah, it just slowly became.
Jennifer Hayes (29:42.871)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (29:59.407)
That's right. That's right.
Megan Jackson (30:04.924)
who I was and now I can hear, I can hear, you know, negative talk quickly. You know what I mean? And it's to the point, it does, it does so much. It does, it does, it really does. And so you're like, ooh, ooh, don't say that, ooh, don't say that. So yeah, it was a healing.
Jennifer Hayes (30:14.326)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (30:15.831)
It jumps out. It does great. It's like, Oh, Oh, that hurt. You know? Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (30:23.551)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (30:27.134)
my husband's gonna look sideways at me when he hears this one, or roll his eyes in the car while he's listening to it, because I will catch him. I've done it our whole relationship since the beginning is that I'm like, wow, like you need to stop speaking because everything coming out of your mouth right now is just like, you're just spiraling downwards. And it went from that to like, he's done so much work.
Megan Jackson (30:42.556)
Hmm.
Megan Jackson (30:49.352)
Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Jennifer Hayes (30:56.054)
before we were ever together, and then we've done so much work together. But I would stop him and be like, stop right now, and say three positive things about yourself. Because he would always, he would say self-deprecating things, et cetera. And he'll catch me every once in a while now too. Like if I'm really in a bad place, it'll come out and he'll be like,
Megan Jackson (30:59.218)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (31:07.544)
I love that.
Papa Rick (31:09.191)
There you go.
Megan Jackson (31:13.226)
Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (31:16.940)
Yeah. Hehehehe.
Papa Rick (31:17.767)
Sure, keeping an eye on each other.
Papa Rick (31:22.257)
Good.
Jennifer Hayes (31:25.238)
say three nice things about yourself right now. And I'm like, you. But yeah, once you do that work and you become so aware and I think sensitive to it, it's like, whoa, hold, like, we are not letting that into our lives.
Megan Jackson (31:26.416)
Yeah, go ahead, hubby, yeah. I love it.
Papa Rick (31:26.951)
Hahaha!
Papa Rick (31:32.945)
That's right!
Megan Jackson (31:39.365)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (31:42.725)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (31:46.444)
It's so real. And you know what, to that point, the question that I always like to ask, especially parents, is, you know, imagine what your life would be now if you learned the power of your words as a child. Like, if three, five-year-old me would have learned this, oh my, again, I'm 35 years old. I would have been so far ahead. Now, thank God for grace, and I'm doing pretty good, but I know that.
Papa Rick (31:47.399)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (32:14.664)
It would have been leaps and bounds, you know what I mean? And so that's why this relational parenting, that's why it's so important to like do this while they're young, you know?
Papa Rick (32:23.471)
Yep. Yeah. You do it. You do it when they're young and then you get like interest or, you know, it builds up and oh gosh. And that's such, it's such, uh, I think, you know, a carrot for parents to know that, you know, if you do this and you have to master yourself, Jenny talks about self regulation and stuff, you know, not everybody's prepared when at the point when they have a baby to do that. But if you work on it,
Megan Jackson (32:37.998)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (32:43.044)
Yes!
Megan Jackson (32:50.640)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (32:53.091)
You'll get better, your babies will better and get better and everybody will be better down the road for it. You know, it's like, Hey, I got, and it gets to the, you know, again, not to being about you, but being serving a purpose, doing, being, and now it's like, okay, we're making the world a better place here or whatever you want to call it. And yeah, it's just, it's just super important. And it's not, it's one of those things I said this earlier this morning. It's.
Megan Jackson (32:54.396)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (32:58.169)
Absolutely.
Megan Jackson (33:06.838)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (33:10.652)
That's it.
Papa Rick (33:19.543)
It's one of those things that's really pretty simple. You know, it's easy to talk about. It's a little harder to execute. Right.
Megan Jackson (33:24.380)
That part, that part, yeah, yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (33:25.506)
Yeah. Especially with that self-work that has to happen before. On the last episode, we were talking about, oh, we could just go into schools and teach this to children. I'm like, no, no. The parents have to do it because the children are going to do what the parents do. The parents have to heal. The parents have to look inside and evaluate and look at their wounds and look at their childhood and really get honest about what they're putting out.
Papa Rick (33:31.523)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (33:38.664)
They have to do it.
Megan Jackson (33:41.736)
That's it.
Papa Rick (33:41.859)
Yeah. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (33:49.360)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (33:54.746)
into their children's lives and minds. And it's a direct reflection of how they talk to themselves. And so there's a re-parenting that has to occur as you step into being a relational parent for your children. And like you were saying, Megan, the children who imagine where we would be if we grew up with these positive life-affirming
Megan Jackson (34:00.252)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (34:01.730)
right?
Megan Jackson (34:05.989)
Mmm, that's good.
Megan Jackson (34:12.985)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (34:14.383)
Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (34:20.721)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (34:24.448)
Oh golly.
Jennifer Hayes (34:25.414)
phrases and practices from the time we were tiny. And like, it's so hard to like imagine that, but it's like, I know I would be leaps and bounds ahead, right? Our kids, the kids who are being parented this way right now, your children right now, they're not even going to know that there was ever a world where this wasn't the norm. They are going to walk out. They are going to…
Megan Jackson (34:28.122)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (34:42.628)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (34:48.892)
Come on, that's what I'm talking about.
Jennifer Hayes (34:54.989)
graduate into the world as literal, like glowing beams of light.
Megan Jackson (34:56.636)
Hmm.
Megan Jackson (35:01.152)
Yes, yes. And it's so real. Like that is, that is so real. Like to the point, and I love that you said that because that is a conversation I have with my husband. I, I, I would tell him, I want my boys to when someone says they can't do something, they're confused. Like, wait, what, who can't, you know, I'm right. Like, what, what do you mean? And not that pie and yeah, not even that pie in the sky of like,
Jennifer Hayes (35:03.958)
Like, ugh.
Jennifer Hayes (35:21.494)
What are you talking about? Of course you can.
Papa Rick (35:24.891)
What's that mean, yeah?
Jennifer Hayes (35:25.143)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (35:27.832)
you can do anything because we were all taught that. And then, you know, life was like, eh, you know, but that honest self assurance of like, you know, even if like, and there's an example in the book where, and I don't tell all the book, but where he's like, you know, yeah, yeah, yeah, you know, without telling all of it, there are times where.
Jennifer Hayes (35:32.714)
Right. Right. Right.
Papa Rick (35:32.859)
Hehehehehehehehe
Jennifer Hayes (35:44.618)
Yeah. I know, right? Let's just read the book. No, everybody go buy it.
Papa Rick (35:52.808)
Buy the book if you want to know that.
Megan Jackson (35:56.092)
We are hoping or saying things that may not come the way we think they should or as quickly, but it goes back to Papa Rick. What he was saying is that it's inside of you. Everything is still inside of you. I want to just really fast, Jenny, talk about what you had just said in regards to parents having to do the work. That is so real. And I think that we as parents have forgotten.
Jennifer Hayes (36:02.459)
Right? Yes.
Jennifer Hayes (36:19.031)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (36:21.612)
Yes.
Megan Jackson (36:25.676)
our main responsibility. And you have to do the work in order to do the work on your child, because they see you and they're going to emulate what they see. You know what I mean? And so I love that. And even Papa Rick, when you were talking about before having kids, you may not know what that looks like. And I remember when I got pregnant with Ellis, I was, you know, I was pretty decent. Being a parent just makes you a better person, period. But if you're working at it, yeah.
Papa Rick (36:36.239)
Yeah. Yeah.
Papa Rick (36:44.336)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (36:52.323)
Yeah, if you're working at it, if you're doing it right.
Jennifer Hayes (36:52.606)
Right, right.
Megan Jackson (36:55.136)
And I remember being pregnant and I would pace the baby room and I would just pray and I would put my hand on my belly and I would say, Lord, I thank you for this world changer. I thank you that at a young age you will fulfill and show him what his purpose is in life. I just started doing that more so for me than even him. I was like, I'm going to train myself to see this baby this way so that when he comes,
Jennifer Hayes (37:02.986)
Hmm
Papa Rick (37:03.306)
Mm.
Jennifer Hayes (37:08.430)
Thanks for watching!
Jennifer Hayes (37:18.270)
Yeah. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (37:24.888)
It's second nature to speak light and second nature to do a mindset shift, but it was working on myself as well. You know,
Jennifer Hayes (37:27.274)
Yeah. Yes.
Papa Rick (37:28.624)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (37:31.387)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (37:34.270)
Yeah, absolutely. And practicing saying those things out loud for me, like we grew up, I grew up in a, we had Methodist ministers on my mom's side. And so we like, you know, we went to church and, and I went to church camps. And so there was like, I was well versed in prayer, but I never, I was never the one like I, it terrified me to pray out loud. And to this day,
Papa Rick (37:47.600)
bunch of them.
Megan Jackson (37:53.479)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (37:59.580)
Hmm.
Jennifer Hayes (38:03.774)
I am still, I'm an extremely internal person. And so like this podcast has been a wicked practice in putting myself out there. But like even inside intimate relationships, I think things and I feel things in my body. And I, but I, I fail to express them out loud sometimes. And I, so it feels silly to me sometimes to do affirmations out loud or to speak.
Megan Jackson (38:11.108)
I love it. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (38:22.707)
Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (38:32.328)
down.
Jennifer Hayes (38:33.146)
words out loud, like very intentional words. It can feel really silly. But when I do it, it's so powerful. And anytime I've ever had someone pray over me or pray for me or whatever it was, I can feel the atoms in my body reacting to the words. I tingle and I cry and I'm…
Megan Jackson (38:38.476)
It can.
Papa Rick (38:40.131)
Yep. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (38:56.100)
Yeah, I love that.
Megan Jackson (39:00.144)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (39:01.746)
It's so powerful. It literally changes your DNA. Like they've shown, like with water droplets, that different sounds, different frequencies and beats will change the physical compound of water into different designs. And our bodies are like 75% water. So what is it you think you're doing when you're listening to certain kinds of music or watching certain kinds of movies or speaking
Papa Rick (39:02.002)
Feel the spirit entering, yeah.
Megan Jackson (39:07.821)
Yes.
Megan Jackson (39:15.684)
Yep, yep, I did, I saw that study. That is amazing.
Megan Jackson (39:27.216)
You better preach, Jen. Yes, yes. Absolutely. And you know, I love, and I love what you were saying about hearing yourself say it, because I think that's really important as well. You know, as part of actually Words Are Magic, we have a deck of cards. We call them culture cards. Yeah, and we call them culture cards because I believe in changing the culture.
Papa Rick (39:29.895)
Skipping rocks on a pond. Ripple!
Jennifer Hayes (39:31.298)
I'm sorry.
Jennifer Hayes (39:35.294)
Yeah, it's life changing.
Jennifer Hayes (39:49.858)
Yes!
Megan Jackson (39:54.392)
Affirmations are good, but I'm like, we're going to do an entire culture shift. So we call them culture cards, but in those cards, they are affirmations, but it's not just about reading them. It's getting your child to say them and to hear them. Um, there's like a study and I don't want to get it wrong. So I'm a paraphrase it, but I know that you believe your voice more so than anyone else. So.
Jennifer Hayes (39:58.763)
Yes.
Jennifer Hayes (40:16.131)
Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (40:21.148)
being able to say it out loud so that you can hear it, it changes the game, you know what I'm saying? Your time. Exactly.
Jennifer Hayes (40:21.711)
Mmm.
Jennifer Hayes (40:25.806)
ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Jennifer Hayes (40:29.878)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (40:29.963)
And it doesn't sound hollow. It's not like I heard this and I'm just repeating it and I'm doing it, but I don't really understand why it's like, oh, I get this and here it comes. Let the spirit. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (40:35.363)
Yeah!
Megan Jackson (40:39.248)
Yes, it's so real. It's so real. And I do that often. I do it with scripture. I do it with culture cards. I got this funky thing where, nope, it ain't even funky. I'm learning how to speak positively when it comes to resources and funds. Because I grew up just penny pension. Just wait, don't, yes.
Jennifer Hayes (40:54.062)
I'm sorry.
Jennifer Hayes (41:00.705)
Yes.
Jennifer Hayes (41:03.574)
Garsity. Yes.
Papa Rick (41:04.003)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (41:04.692)
And I tell myself that every morning, girl, money chases you down. It finds you. Like, what are you wearing? It's a resource. It's a resource, you know? And so when I hear myself though, something in me is like, let's go, let's go girl, you got this, you know? So it's really important to, to use your voice out loud and hear it. And even if it's uncomfortable.
Jennifer Hayes (41:10.302)
Yes. Yes.
Jennifer Hayes (41:18.230)
Yes.
Papa Rick (41:18.823)
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Megan Jackson (41:28.892)
keep doing it until you start liking the sound of your own voice and you start to, you know, the doubt begins to fade and you're like, okay, this, this is the route we go.
Jennifer Hayes (41:35.011)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (41:41.815)
Isn't that part of like the theory of multiple intelligences or something? I mean, when you study, there's reading and there's hearing and there's speaking and hearing your own voice and there's doing, and I forget what the, you know, who are absolutely saying it out loud. I was part of a ministry and, and one of the steps in the, it was a long weekend, three day, three day retreat thing. And one of the activities after they've been there a day or two is to take your group, you know, you could sit in tables and.
Jennifer Hayes (41:41.963)
Maybe that's.
Jennifer Hayes (41:45.631)
Mmm.
Megan Jackson (41:47.106)
Yes.
Megan Jackson (41:51.558)
Yep.
Papa Rick (42:10.139)
group leader, you go off and you take turns passing across around a group and everybody prays out loud. You cannot do it, but you give everybody an opportunity to pray in a small group where they know out loud. I know, that's what made me think of it.
Megan Jackson (42:17.380)
Mmm.
Megan Jackson (42:22.641)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (42:24.734)
My worst nightmare. Not so much anymore, but I still am like, don't say anything stupid.
Megan Jackson (42:32.248)
Hehehehe
Papa Rick (42:34.595)
But after a couple of days, you'll learn and you'll listen to other people and you'll learn there's nothing wrong to say. Don't fake it. Just be quiet and speak what's in your heart. Everybody goes, yeah, you know, that's the thing. And it's good practice. It's an opening, ice breaking kind of thing. You know, it's good to hear your own voice.
Megan Jackson (42:36.892)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (42:43.856)
Yeah!
Megan Jackson (42:48.472)
Absolutely. It is. It absolutely is. It is. And it's like, you know, I'll go back to, so my background is broadcast journalism. And so years ago, I would hate being on camera. I hated the sound of my voice and things like that. And yeah, you know, it wasn't until I kept listening that I was like, girl, there ain't nothing wrong with your voice. Like there's nothing wrong with you. You were okay. You were good, you know.
Papa Rick (43:08.731)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (43:14.668)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (43:18.248)
And it's a part of that self love and healing, Jen, that you were talking about is healing all the way through it. So yeah, I think the power of language, hearing yourself say it, and to that point, hearing your parents say it. My parents are amazing, but there are still some things that I would have loved my mama to say, or to my, you know what I'm saying? My dad said a whole lot, but.
Jennifer Hayes (43:18.454)
Yes.
Papa Rick (43:18.555)
Hahaha!
Jennifer Hayes (43:22.946)
Yeah. Yeah.
Papa Rick (43:22.947)
Yeah. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (43:39.806)
Mm-hmm. Yes, yes.
Papa Rick (43:42.641)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (43:43.164)
There were things that I wouldn't, my dad was always like, he was, he's gonna tell me I'm a you daddy's baby girl, you were smart, yes you can, you know, and not that my mom didn't, but she grew up different. You know, she grew up differently. He was, yeah, and so even to that point of taking things that maybe as a child I wish I had, and being able to be intentional with my boys and make sure I say those things.
Jennifer Hayes (43:55.180)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (43:55.471)
He was very affirming, yeah.
Papa Rick (44:10.223)
I'll have to work on that because I didn't grow up with that, but my girlfriend needs it and I need to practice that better being, you know, letting it out of your mouth, even if you think it, you know, being a little more explicit about it.
Jennifer Hayes (44:10.414)
That's like the...
Megan Jackson (44:14.216)
Hmm, yeah. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (44:21.220)
Absolutely.
Jennifer Hayes (44:24.034)
That's like that concept of looking back at my childhood and what I wish I had, and then becoming that thing yourself for your children. And not in the spirit of, I wish my parents would have, there's like these.
Megan Jackson (44:34.801)
Yes.
Jennifer Hayes (44:47.110)
six Christmas presents that I didn't get. My wishes didn't come true. Not in that sense of like, I'm going to buy my kids everything and spoil them and all of that, but like giving them the things or overcompensating in like a permissive way where we don't have any boundaries or any rules or any, you know, there can be misconstrued in so many ways, but giving your kids like with what we know now with so much research.
Megan Jackson (44:48.077)
Yeah, yeah.
Megan Jackson (44:53.132)
Right? Yeah, I know.
Megan Jackson (44:59.292)
Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (45:09.988)
Yeah. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (45:13.226)
and so many books and so much access to information now with what we know now, how to be better, to do it better, what I wish I'd had when I was a kid. Everybody has those moments that you can look back on in your memory bank, whether you were 3, 5, 10, 15, that you have a specific memory with a parent or another adult who absolutely crushed you.
Megan Jackson (45:22.460)
Yes.
Megan Jackson (45:27.781)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (45:31.322)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (45:36.055)
Oh.
Megan Jackson (45:39.656)
That's so true. It does, it does. Oh, that is so good.
Papa Rick (45:40.559)
Yeah, something, stuff sticks, trauma.
Jennifer Hayes (45:44.398)
And to transform that, to look back and go, in that moment, I needed this. I needed to be responded to this way. And going, okay, how do I cultivate that in myself, in my ability to respond to an upset teenager who is running their mouth? Like, can you look past behavior? Can you look into that child and go, what does this child need?
Megan Jackson (45:53.373)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (45:56.485)
Yes.
Megan Jackson (46:03.075)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (46:12.222)
Mmm.
Jennifer Hayes (46:12.906)
right now, what need is not being met and how can I respond to that lovingly?
Megan Jackson (46:17.600)
I love that. Jen, girl, you are something else. I mean, you hit the core of me like, yes.
Jennifer Hayes (46:23.694)
Thank you. I'm going to call you every day because you're my new cheerleader.
Megan Jackson (46:26.804)
Look, man, she like for real, like something that you said really struck a chord in regards to we all have that person or that individual, whether it's a teacher, whether it's that has said something that you remember that struck a chord and it did something to you. I read this journal of a guy who was talking about the power words and he said, we come into...
Papa Rick (46:28.167)
That's right. Call each other every morning.
Megan Jackson (46:55.644)
the world an empty canvas, and we allow words to paint us. And as it's being painted, that portrait is depending on what's being said. You know what I mean? And I thought, dang, that is so real. I can remember even what teachers have said. Actually, in June, I'm gonna be speaking to a group of librarians, just sharing this specific aspect of like, you know.
Jennifer Hayes (47:02.466)
Mmm.
Papa Rick (47:07.619)
Yeah, yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (47:08.460)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (47:21.108)
what you say to these, it doesn't have to just be your child. You know, that's the thing. It's not just your child. It is children. What you say to these babies matter. Like we all can remember a time where we felt embarrassed, we felt ashamed or a teacher made you feel some type of way, you know what I mean? So just taking time and my boys are three and one, but once they hit teenage age, I'ma call you Jen and get some help.
Jennifer Hayes (47:24.212)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (47:29.791)
Yes.
Jennifer Hayes (47:32.630)
Yes.
Jennifer Hayes (47:41.557)
Yep.
Jennifer Hayes (47:49.962)
Yes. Yes.
Megan Jackson (47:51.084)
because I don't know if I'm ready yet. I'm getting ready. So yeah, I know that there's just different levels to it.
Jennifer Hayes (47:58.974)
Yeah. And there's, I always try to remind parents, no matter how old your kids are, like whether they're infants or teenagers or anything in between, the rules are the same. Like the same concepts apply. So the way that you speak to your six month old when they're screaming because you're changing their diaper is the same response you're going to give your teenager who's bitching at you about curfew.
Megan Jackson (48:10.044)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (48:22.792)
Hmm. Yeah, yeah. That's good.
Papa Rick (48:26.735)
Yeah. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (48:28.766)
Right? So the rules are the same. And it applies to adults too. You can apply everything. It's emotional intelligence is what I'm teaching. It's relationship skills, how to respond to someone in distress, how to respond to negative emotions, how to integrate and be capable of holding space for the full reality of being human. And
Megan Jackson (48:33.841)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (48:39.080)
Yeah, yeah.
Megan Jackson (48:53.221)
Absolutely.
Jennifer Hayes (48:55.858)
and how to give empathy instead of fixing something. How to, you know, and with kids, it's how to bring them in and collaborate with problem solving instead of punishment. And the concepts are the same no matter how old you are. Like as a human being, the connection that we need is the same no matter our age. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (49:03.452)
Hmm, yeah.
Megan Jackson (49:13.989)
I love that.
Papa Rick (49:15.259)
Yeah, from a more linear side, I think of it as it being like fractal or a scalable skill where when they're young or they're old, the curve is the same. The principle is that you're dealing with empathy, dealing with the emotions, it's the same kind of thing. So then that's a skill that translates to ages, people, different relationships.
Megan Jackson (49:26.160)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (49:29.798)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (49:40.911)
I love it.
Papa Rick (49:44.854)
These are good skills this girl is coming up with here and teaching.
Megan Jackson (49:46.816)
Yeah, absolutely. They really are. And I'll say this too, to that point is I think, um, because you're talking about the punishment side of it. That for me is what I'm learning, even with a three year old who flips out because like you said, cause the cup is green and he wants the blue one. And so you give them the blue one, but no, I don't want the blue either. So I'm gonna just fall out. You know what I mean? Yes. Yes. Yeah. So even to that point,
Jennifer Hayes (49:57.858)
Mm.
Jennifer Hayes (50:01.879)
Oh yeah.
Papa Rick (50:07.439)
Yeah, that's right. What he wants is the drama. Yeah. What's a little excitement is what he wants.
Jennifer Hayes (50:07.607)
Mm-hmm.
Jennifer Hayes (50:10.294)
Yep. Yep.
Megan Jackson (50:16.140)
I'll say that is where for me, the intentional speech comes in where I have to, instead of Ellis, sit down and be quiet. Instead of that, it's like, Ellis, are you having what is wrong? Talk to mommy, use your words. What's wrong? What's wrong? Okay. Well, let's take a minute. And there are times where I'm like, you know what? Let's have a seat. We're going to calm down. And when you're ready to use your words, you come talk to mama. You know what I mean? But
Jennifer Hayes (50:22.157)
Yes.
Papa Rick (50:23.315)
Hmm.
Jennifer Hayes (50:26.850)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (50:33.320)
Use your words. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (50:33.718)
Yeah. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (50:43.680)
Even in those moments, that's where I'm now learning. Where I'm like, he's three years old. You can't find a three year old. Just calm down. Let's see what's wrong with him and what you know. So yeah. Hehehehe.
Jennifer Hayes (50:50.838)
Right? Right? Right?
Papa Rick (50:51.599)
That's right.
Papa Rick (50:55.075)
Yeah. And it's that, let's go. All right. All right. Does it, you know, I mean, you, you, you can't react with a lot of time to everything, but when you get in a situation and you realize, okay, something's up here, but let's sit down for a minute. Let's take a minute. Let's figure this one out. And that pays such huge dividends long, long term, you know, that ability to pull yourself out of, I got to get to church on time instead of three minutes late.
Megan Jackson (51:02.929)
they are.
Megan Jackson (51:06.886)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (51:09.948)
that. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (51:14.200)
Absolutely.
Megan Jackson (51:19.469)
Yeah, that, yeah.
Papa Rick (51:23.107)
or whatever it is, you know, parenting is so busy and so dynamic and so hard that skill of, wait a second, little bubble of peace here and okay, now we can move on and that's all it takes, you know.
Megan Jackson (51:26.486)
It is.
Megan Jackson (51:34.587)
Oh, I like that.
Megan Jackson (51:37.536)
Y'all be dropping gems. I'm taking that one too. Bubble of peace. Yes. I'm going to use that with my boys. You know what? Let's step into the bubble of peace. That's beautiful.
Papa Rick (51:40.772)
Oh really? Level of peace, that's good, okay.
Jennifer Hayes (51:41.990)
Bubble of peace. This is our bubble of peace. Yes. Yes.
Papa Rick (51:45.863)
Alright, I need to talk to you every morning too. You're awful, Chip.
Jennifer Hayes (51:50.774)
Well, right. She's our hype girl. And there's and I also like, I teach I want to say this and then I want to get us I want to get us back on track with your story, Megan. But a lot of times addressing their emotion and using connection instead of demands or rushing through something because we don't have time.
Papa Rick (51:54.555)
Hehehehe
Megan Jackson (52:02.791)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (52:18.118)
A literal one phrase of connection will actually save you so much time versus a tantrum, falling apart, complete oblivion of like, I am lost in the chaos. If you can see your child's upset and go, that's so frustrating, you didn't get the cup that you wanted. Let's go get a different cup.
Megan Jackson (52:25.864)
Wow.
Papa Rick (52:26.211)
Yeah, yeah, long term.
Megan Jackson (52:34.821)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (52:47.178)
that acknowledgement of what they're feeling in that moment, they'll just be like, oh, it is frustrating. And they can't say this to you, but being seen, being seen is, that's all they want, that's all they need. That's all anybody wants is to be witnessed.
Megan Jackson (52:48.152)
Yeah. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (52:53.414)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (52:57.632)
Yeah, that's so good. Yeah. Yeah.
Papa Rick (52:59.774)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (53:04.132)
Yes, it is.
Papa Rick (53:04.901)
That's the root cause. That's really what's, you know, the thing is never about the, the episode is never about the thing. You know, a lot of times, right, it's about something else. And so that connection is soothing on that. You know? Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
Megan Jackson (53:10.876)
the thing right, right?
Jennifer Hayes (53:11.937)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (53:14.340)
Absolutely. That's good. Yeah, for sure.
Jennifer Hayes (53:20.238)
So Megan, I want to make sure we, this has been such a great conversation, but I want to make sure that we are getting like all of your stuff on here. Cause you, everything you do is just so exciting. You, I don't know, I'm gonna have like a list of things. I don't know. I know. So you've started a kid's brand of clothing and,
Papa Rick (53:31.467)
Oh my golly. That's why I like the notes. It's like, yeah, I mean, there's gotta be a couple of, otherwise I just get to talking and I never hit an actual point.
Megan Jackson (53:38.908)
We're chatting. It's all good. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (53:49.378)
When you and I were talking, we talked about the power of raising children from the inside out and your clothing brand, you know, with each order, and correct me if this isn't accurate anymore, but with each order, you get one of the culture cards or they're also available to purchase as a 52 card deck. You can purchase the whole deck. And so it's…
Megan Jackson (53:56.023)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (54:02.668)
No, you're right. You're right. Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (54:13.977)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (54:14.663)
Where is this? Did I miss something? I'm sorry to interrupt one more.
Megan Jackson (54:17.876)
Oh no, that's okay. So it's at kclothier.com. So it's on our website where you can get a deck of cards. It's 52. So one for each week. Me and my son, we pull one every week. You know, the one that I like to always talk about is now we've got a biblically based one. That's the one that I love. Yeah. And we do we pull it and you know, I'll say I am he says God's best. I say I am he says God's best.
Papa Rick (54:34.700)
Oh, okay.
Papa Rick (54:37.955)
Like a little lesson, yeah, a little devotional thing, kind of, okay.
Megan Jackson (54:46.040)
You know, and it's become a repetition and he knows on Sunday, it's time to pull a card. You know, he's like, but now he's like, I am God's best. I said, no, we got a new one. We got a new one. You are God's best, but let's get a new one. Yeah. So yeah, with, with each, um, drop, we, we have a, a card that goes into each drop, but then you can also buy the deck. And so we've got a biblically based deck and then now we've got a words or magic deck and the words are magic deck.
Papa Rick (54:50.154)
Outstanding!
Jennifer Hayes (54:53.130)
Yeah...
Jennifer Hayes (54:56.778)
Yeah. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.
Papa Rick (54:57.736)
And last week, and last week.
Papa Rick (55:01.974)
Alright.
Megan Jackson (55:15.164)
is based on principles from the book. So it's mostly about speech and words and the biblical deck was just because it's who I am, right? So I was like, this is an easy way to teach Ellis and Ezra to say what God says, bite size. And so of course it's paraphrase and things like that. Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
Jennifer Hayes (55:20.314)
Mm-hmm.
Papa Rick (55:22.471)
Research.
Papa Rick (55:26.147)
Yeah, yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (55:26.219)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (55:33.165)
Uh huh.
Jennifer Hayes (55:33.322)
Yeah. Yeah.
Papa Rick (55:35.847)
Start real young. Yeah. Outstanding. Yeah. Get all these, make sure we get all these links and, uh, in the, really in the social media out there. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (55:38.090)
I love it though, I love it.
Jennifer Hayes (55:43.614)
Oh yeah, everything will be linked in the show notes. And then yeah, it'll be. So you've got the Kid Clothier, you've got with the affirmation cards, the culture cards, which you have two decks now. So everybody should order the book, Words Are Magic, and the Words Are Magic card deck, or the culture cards that are what, Christian based, Bible based.
Megan Jackson (55:44.216)
Yeah, awesome.
Megan Jackson (55:57.308)
Yeah. Yes.
Papa Rick (56:02.331)
You heard it here, folks.
Megan Jackson (56:03.685)
Yes.
Megan Jackson (56:09.940)
So yeah, the culture cards are Bible based. It'll say on there too that these are biblically based. And then there's a Words are Magic deck, culture card deck, but we're selling that as a bundle too. So we've got the Words are Magic book and the deck. And we're actually, for those who pre-ordered, and pre-order actually will end by the time this airs, but we're selecting five people at random to receive a deck of cards. So we'll see who.
Jennifer Hayes (56:31.958)
Okay.
Megan Jackson (56:38.244)
that is and so I'm excited to be able to. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think that's fair. I think that's fair, Poparick. So yeah, we've got those two and you know, things are just moving fast. I mean, because we talked a month ago.
Jennifer Hayes (56:43.498)
Random.
Papa Rick (56:46.572)
You cannot have one now. You know that, right? You are excluded. Family and friends may not win on this show.
Jennifer Hayes (56:51.078)
You don't know. You don't know.
Jennifer Hayes (56:57.962)
Hehehehe
Jennifer Hayes (57:06.306)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (57:07.356)
Has it been a month? Maybe?
Jennifer Hayes (57:09.962)
I think it's been a little, maybe even a little more because we did the whole, I talked to you in like February, I think. Yeah. Yeah. You are like, you are on a train, man. You were just like, yeah.
Megan Jackson (57:16.856)
Okay, a lot has just happened since then. No. It is. It's going so fast. Like I said, it's growing legs. The partnerships have been beautiful. Working to just connect with these, the local hospital, the children's, I think for me, that one alone, and I'm in the process, book, touring, and the kids are so excited.
Papa Rick (57:20.771)
Yeah, this is moving right along!
Jennifer Hayes (57:41.290)
You've been book touring! Yes! Yeah.
Megan Jackson (57:46.672)
They love it. We turned it into this little jingle and I'll have them like clap it up, clap it up. And I will say, I say what I have, I say what I have and I have what I say and I have what I say. I just what I need. I just what I need to find my way. So it's turned into this little jingle and by the time we read it, the kids are like, I say what I have, I have what I say. You know, they're amped up. And so it's it's so fun.
Papa Rick (57:47.195)
Terrific.
Papa Rick (58:00.165)
Nice.
Jennifer Hayes (58:01.659)
Oh my god, girl!
Papa Rick (58:05.303)
Wow!
Papa Rick (58:09.975)
Hahaha!
Jennifer Hayes (58:10.107)
Yes! Aww.
Megan Jackson (58:14.148)
Who would have thought my life's purpose would be tied to speaking life into the next generation? I would have never in my life thought that ever, but here we are and it feels great.
Jennifer Hayes (58:22.219)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (58:25.346)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (58:28.438)
I love it.
Papa Rick (58:28.571)
Well, you're also in the corporate world, right? You know, you're like cubicles and offices and doors and meetings and conference tables and stuff. And this is just another direction. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (58:30.036)
I am. Yes. Yeah. Another avenue. So I work actually for Gap Inc. My nine to five is a change manager. And so I help individuals, which is interesting because it all correlates, but I help individuals adapt to change. So it's more the people side of change and not the org side of change.
Papa Rick (58:48.004)
Oh, cool. Excuse me.
Papa Rick (58:54.649)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (58:58.576)
So helping it one person at a time, which is so naturally, you know, ebbs and flows into this line of work. You know what I mean? So yeah, I am spinning my wheels in a beautiful way. And...
Papa Rick (58:59.065)
Yeah!
Jennifer Hayes (58:59.542)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (59:06.846)
Yes, it does.
Jennifer Hayes (59:12.931)
Do you sleep? Are you okay?
Megan Jackson (59:15.108)
You know what, it is such a great question. Am I okay most days? Most days. Most days, yes. There are some days where I'm like, I can't do it today. I just physically cannot do it today. So yeah, yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (59:19.331)
Ugh. Haha.
Jennifer Hayes (59:25.504)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (59:25.923)
Yeah. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (59:28.662)
Yeah. Awesome.
Papa Rick (59:31.003)
living the dream, living the dream, doing what you love and oh by the way, the money will come, right? That kind of thing. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (59:31.176)
living the dream.
Megan Jackson (59:35.440)
That part. The money is coming. It's in route. Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. That part. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (59:40.074)
Yes, yes.
Papa Rick (59:41.615)
Do something you enjoy and then you don't have to worry about the drudgery. Excellent.
Jennifer Hayes (59:46.282)
I'm like, I'm really working with the energies ever since I've kind of, ever since that post, my COVID post, I've been diving really deep into a lot of mindset work and just kind of getting back on track after being sick for so long anyway. And yeah, and they're in like,
Megan Jackson (01:00:05.544)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (01:00:07.448)
A pivot, I think you called it.
Megan Jackson (01:00:08.252)
pivot. I like that.
Jennifer Hayes (01:00:13.150)
I was saying in the last episode, like I've done mindset work for a decade now and I've, you know, all the healing and all the therapy and yoga and all of the things, all the spiritual journey breakthrough things. And so I have, like I have it in me, but sometimes we all fall back down the mountain, right? Or we step off the path or whatever. And I don't, I don't, I think it just got de-prioritized.
Megan Jackson (01:00:24.453)
Yeah, yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:00:33.916)
Absolutely. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:00:42.862)
And I've been so focused on the hustle and building a business and just lost in the thought of creating and the momentum that occurs once you start something. And then it's like, so many things need your attention all of the time 24-7 and how do you prioritize and time manage and you know, so like just all of the spiritual practices, the mindset, the like waking up and
Megan Jackson (01:00:43.105)
Oh.
Megan Jackson (01:00:48.966)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:00:59.634)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:01:07.493)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:01:10.958)
I see your stories and you post from your devotional book and whatnot and just getting so it's been on my mind a lot to get back into a morning practice where I wake up and like really set my intentions for the day and find my joy and my excitement versus my to-do list and my stress. And when you approach life, whether it's the words that you speak, speaking life,
Megan Jackson (01:01:14.442)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:01:19.964)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:01:25.468)
Yes.
Megan Jackson (01:01:29.820)
Yes. Yep.
Jennifer Hayes (01:01:40.486)
I call it speaking love over fear. So are you approaching things through love? Are you approaching things through fear? Money mindset with scarcity versus abundance, same thing. What are you putting out into the world? The money is chasing me. The money's coming. It's coming. I just have to keep following that heart compass.
Megan Jackson (01:01:41.361)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:01:48.520)
Good.
Megan Jackson (01:02:00.452)
Yeah, yeah.
Papa Rick (01:02:02.593)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (01:02:06.992)
Yes.
Papa Rick (01:02:08.079)
Mm-hmm.
Jennifer Hayes (01:02:09.194)
and which is also in the book. I love that part. I was like, that's something I've always talked about is like follow your heart, follow your heart, follow your heart.
Megan Jackson (01:02:12.620)
It is.
Papa Rick (01:02:16.700)
Oh, that's right. That's right.
Megan Jackson (01:02:21.796)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:02:26.026)
where was I going with this? That concept of, oh, the money is coming. The money is chasing me. That belief to have the faith and know you're not going to be homeless. The worst thing that's going to happen to you is that it's not going to work and you're going to pick something else. Unless you make some seriously heavy, ridiculous, outrageous life-altering choices.
Megan Jackson (01:02:42.180)
Right, right.
Megan Jackson (01:02:50.596)
Yeah. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:02:52.714)
You know, like in general, like you are, you are following your heart, you're putting good out into the world. Like the money is going to find you.
Megan Jackson (01:03:02.356)
And that's the thing with, even with money, Jen and Poparik, it is a resource. That's it. I think we give it so much power. And when we do that, it's like a repellent. You know what I mean? And it's a resource. And naturally, like you were saying, back to being intentional with your mornings, that is something that...
Jennifer Hayes (01:03:13.886)
Yes.
Jennifer Hayes (01:03:19.670)
Yeah. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:03:23.031)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:03:31.344)
I was doing a lot before I had kids. I had kids and I just fell off. And I was off my game. And I'm like, the days were just long and they were just all over. And back in July of last year, I made the intention, you're getting up every morning and you're gonna do your devotion and you're gonna do your journaling and you're gonna, I have this like music. It's just instrumental that plays as a journal.
Jennifer Hayes (01:03:37.230)
Mm-hmm.
Papa Rick (01:03:37.595)
Hmm. Yeah, it's a chef.
Megan Jackson (01:03:59.448)
and I start doing my confessions and I'm like, it is what it is. And some days are just really tough as you just wake up sometimes and it's just funky. And I literally started telling myself and telling the Lord I'm not leaving this post until there's a shift in my mood because I need the day to be, you know what I'm saying? It's not gonna be perfect, but you gotta create a shift and I'm not leaving here until we do.
Jennifer Hayes (01:03:59.543)
Hmm.
Jennifer Hayes (01:04:07.563)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Jennifer Hayes (01:04:17.098)
Yeah. Mmm.
Jennifer Hayes (01:04:23.478)
Yeah. Yeah.
Papa Rick (01:04:25.591)
And that's great. You're not, you're not saying, okay, I'm going to spend eight minutes at this. You're like, there's like, you're, you're internally, we've talked about that. Jenny and I talked about that before about your, it's an internal. Flag you're waiting for. Okay. I have a feeling and now it's time to go forward. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:04:27.935)
Right?
Megan Jackson (01:04:31.898)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:04:35.540)
It is. It is. Yeah. That's exactly it. And, you know, to Jenny's point, when you were talking about being intentional, it's very interesting because my friend and I were talking this weekend, actually. And, you know, I am a big believer in therapy, a big believer. And, you know,
Jennifer Hayes (01:04:38.786)
Hmm.
Jennifer Hayes (01:05:00.058)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:05:00.264)
having not just a therapist, but even a business coach. And especially with this entrepreneurial journey, you know what I mean? And she and I were talking about, she was like, I really think you should look into getting a therapist, just someone to talk to. It doesn't always mean something is gravely wrong, but as you are, oh really, it's so real. It's like.
Jennifer Hayes (01:05:04.643)
Yes.
Papa Rick (01:05:06.331)
Thank you.
Jennifer Hayes (01:05:20.970)
Yes, I just posted about this too. Yeah, yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:05:25.976)
As you are becoming, and you think of entrepreneurship and how fast even like with this book, it's going so quickly, you are becoming a different person. And I'm learning who this person is. And as I'm learning who she is, she's changing into someone else. And it's moving so fast that you really do need someone to say, look, I just need to talk this out. I'm an entrepreneur, I'm an author now. I'm a mama of two boys. I lead worship at church. I'm a wife.
Jennifer Hayes (01:05:33.784)
Mm-hmm.
Jennifer Hayes (01:05:43.074)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:05:49.611)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:05:54.828)
I have a corporate job. Like who am I? Sometimes I wake up and I'm like, girl, good Lord. Like, you know what I mean? So you really do need that, um, ability to be able to just talk to someone. So come Monday morning, it is on my to-do list to go and find me a therapist. And I told my friends six months is what I'm committing to six months of every week we're going to do, we're going to do the work, the me work.
Jennifer Hayes (01:06:00.685)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (01:06:03.771)
Hahaha!
Jennifer Hayes (01:06:13.101)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:06:17.611)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (01:06:19.655)
That's right.
Papa Rick (01:06:22.267)
Not like two or three, not like two or three get togethers, but it's like, yeah, we gotta give this a chance, you know? And you might have to find more than one. You don't just go to one. You gotta hit it off with somebody, just like a friend. People think of, you know, there's so much negative, can't think of the word I'm looking for, that you're broken when you go, you know, you can't fix yourself. And it's like, no, no, no, it's more like.
Jennifer Hayes (01:06:23.191)
Yes.
Megan Jackson (01:06:25.210)
Right? Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:06:29.861)
Absolutely.
Megan Jackson (01:06:33.486)
Absolutely.
Megan Jackson (01:06:45.217)
Yeah!
Papa Rick (01:06:49.699)
You want to tune up your golf swing. I mean, you've got where you are. You're fine, but you can't fix your own golf swing. Somebody else has to look at your golf swing. Right. And say, no, you're, you're moving your hips too quick or something. Thanks. You know, it's just somebody to talk to about stuff and give you an insight. You could spend a hundred years trying to fix your own golf swing by yourself, or you do it in a couple of hour lesson with somebody else watching you.
Megan Jackson (01:06:51.396)
Yeah!
Megan Jackson (01:06:55.984)
Yeah. Yes.
Jennifer Hayes (01:06:56.534)
And don't wait till you're broken.
Megan Jackson (01:07:02.258)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:07:05.553)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:07:11.393)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:07:15.181)
Yeah, really quick.
Jennifer Hayes (01:07:16.407)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (01:07:19.299)
You struggle as you want. Not everybody's prepared to grow and, and move on and, you know, to be an entrepreneur, you got to be a learner. You got to be right. You got to be flexible and agile and all that. And, uh, not in the software development methodology, uh, meaning. And, and it's not for everybody. You got to grow into that. Like we were talking about before all this stuff, it just, I think in pictures and lines and it's like, Oh my God, all this stuff is just coming together here.
Megan Jackson (01:07:23.249)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:07:26.257)
You do.
Megan Jackson (01:07:29.669)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:07:33.552)
Hehehehe.
Megan Jackson (01:07:39.697)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:07:41.132)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:07:46.898)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (01:07:47.931)
But it's what you're saying is all is all true. Man, you gotta you gotta be ready to go when it hits, you know.
Megan Jackson (01:07:52.588)
Absolutely. Absolutely. Have y'all really fast? Have y'all heard that book called Who Not How? Have y'all ever read that book? I am reading it now and it is life-changing, like for real, for real. And it talks about kind of what we're talking about, like not necessarily therapy, but like the issue or the problem that we continue to face with entrepreneurship and
Papa Rick (01:08:03.003)
Who not how?
Jennifer Hayes (01:08:03.086)
I don't think so.
Jennifer Hayes (01:08:09.698)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:08:19.388)
Um, just all of this really encompassing as we're looking for the, how, how do I do this? How do I do that? Instead of saying who, who is the individual that's going to help make this happen? Yeah. Go get help. And it, but it, it, it, it literally will catapult you leaps and bounds faster. You know? So to Jenny's point of don't wait until you're wounded or broke down. Do it ahead of time. Like, yeah.
Papa Rick (01:08:20.487)
Hmm.
Jennifer Hayes (01:08:27.370)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (01:08:29.991)
Go ask for help. Yeah, that's a horrible- I'm horrible at that.
Papa Rick (01:08:37.571)
Yeah. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:08:38.838)
Yeah. Yup.
Papa Rick (01:08:45.359)
Yep. Yep.
Jennifer Hayes (01:08:45.822)
Yeah. Don't wait till the check engine light is on and your brakes, then your brakes don't work. Like you need to go every six months and get a tune up. And like shameless plug, hire a coach. Like.
Megan Jackson (01:08:48.220)
That part. Right. Yes.
Papa Rick (01:08:49.206)
Exactly.
Papa Rick (01:08:56.507)
That's funny.
Megan Jackson (01:08:57.124)
Yeah. Hello? Yeah.
Papa Rick (01:09:00.387)
Hey, let's, we're being authentic here. We're not, we're not doing this just as a hobby, you know, we're hoping to help the world and see what comes of it. It's funny that the exact same thing popped into my head. Change your oil. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Jennifer Hayes (01:09:03.422)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:09:04.837)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:09:07.273)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:09:09.601)
Absolutely.
Jennifer Hayes (01:09:11.894)
Well, that's me serving. I know as you were talking, I was like my favorite sponsor. Ha ha ha.
Megan Jackson (01:09:14.320)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:09:19.886)
Yeah!
Jennifer Hayes (01:09:23.318)
But we, but, um, oh gosh, talking about, um, I lost it. You're going to therapy, you, oh, integrating. So when, especially when life gets really fast, or even if life isn't that crazy, there's, so when, when children, when anyone experiences something emotionally traumatic or, or emotion, like deeply emotional,
Papa Rick (01:09:30.567)
Sorry.
Megan Jackson (01:09:36.156)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:09:45.788)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:09:50.486)
The way that it gets processed, if you have children or if you've taken care of children and witnessed this, when something traumatic happens to a small child, the way that they process that and integrate that experience and heal from it is by playing it out in story form. So, they retell. So I've taken care of children for 20 years. And with one of my nanny families, one of the children had a…
Megan Jackson (01:10:03.696)
Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (01:10:06.792)
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Papa Rick (01:10:07.803)
Mmm. Mmm.
Jennifer Hayes (01:10:21.314)
a seizure. I was deciding how much I should tell, but I'm not going to say names or anything, so it doesn't matter. Had a seizure at school, but it didn't look like a seizure. It looked like him like fainting almost from like heat exhaustion. And he was very low. He was three. And I went to pick him up from preschool and the teacher was like, you know, he's…
Megan Jackson (01:10:23.069)
Mmm.
Megan Jackson (01:10:35.943)
Okay.
Papa Rick (01:10:38.051)
Yeah, yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:10:47.202)
He seems like really exhausted, really fatigued, something kind of weird's going on. And he hadn't collapsed yet. But when I got there, he collapsed on me. And I mean, he was barely conscious. And it was terrifying, because not only is this a child in distress, this is someone else's child that I'm responsible for. And my whole body just went into like.
Megan Jackson (01:10:56.545)
Oh my.
Papa Rick (01:11:04.123)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:11:07.966)
Mmm, yeah, my god.
Papa Rick (01:11:08.535)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:11:13.550)
mommy hyper focused mode and I swooped him and I swooped his sister and I got to the car and I called the dad because I knew mom was at work and so and she's a doctor so she wasn't able I knew she wasn't gonna be able to answer so I called dad and he was like you know get him to the yeah I was like do you want me to call 911 or get to the ER because he's not like he's breathing which one do you think is
Megan Jackson (01:11:14.253)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:11:27.268)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:11:35.015)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (01:11:38.991)
He's little enough I can carry him.
Jennifer Hayes (01:11:40.330)
because I was also, I was in an area that was pretty close to several hospitals. And so anyway, he ended up in the back of an ambulance and he was, you know, barely aware, seemingly, of a lot of things and then ended up in the hospital and all the things. And he's completely fine, completely normal. Apparently, there's like things that happen to small children sometimes that can cause random seizures that have nothing to do with a disease. So weird. So anyway, but-
Megan Jackson (01:12:01.615)
Mmm.
Jennifer Hayes (01:12:07.342)
moving forward after the first couple of weeks of him being kind of like extra clingy and needy and like really needing that connection and comfort of, I just had this awful experience, I don't know what's going on. He then started in his play with his sister or with me, he would start to build fire engines and ambulances out of couch cushions and couches or
Megan Jackson (01:12:18.437)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (01:12:20.046)
Mm.
Papa Rick (01:12:30.407)
Oh boy, big time, yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:12:31.536)
Wow. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:12:34.858)
other toys and he would build an ambulance and then he would make his sister or me, but usually it was his little sister, lay down in the back of the fire truck or in the back of the ambulance. But if you asked him, he had no memory of this thing occurring, but he would play it out in his play and he would literally sit there and listen and watch him play it out with his sister and do like pretend like he was sticking things on her.
Megan Jackson (01:12:46.204)
Wow.
Papa Rick (01:12:46.979)
he would act it out.
Megan Jackson (01:12:52.356)
Wow.
Papa Rick (01:12:52.775)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:12:57.988)
Yeah, right conscious memory, yeah.
Papa Rick (01:12:59.715)
No conscious memory maybe.
Papa Rick (01:13:03.407)
Hmm.
Jennifer Hayes (01:13:03.758)
and like do things to her that mimics what EMT does to you in the back of an ambulance.
Papa Rick (01:13:08.240)
Wow.
Megan Jackson (01:13:08.256)
Wow, that's wild. Everything. That subconscious mind is what's picking that up, yeah.
Papa Rick (01:13:11.555)
More evidence that kids record everything that goes on around them all the time. Doesn't matter. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:13:15.544)
Yes.
Jennifer Hayes (01:13:18.074)
Yes. Well, and so when adults go to therapy, we're storytelling, we're having an experience. And whether it's good or bad or somewhere in between, we go to therapy and that is our time. That is our unobstructed, like only there's no reciprocation. It's like I get to be, I get to tell my story and be seen and witnessed and not judged.
Megan Jackson (01:13:24.908)
Mm-hmm.
Papa Rick (01:13:31.140)
Ahem.
Megan Jackson (01:13:40.930)
Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (01:13:46.341)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:13:46.978)
There's no like emotional responsibility with the other person. It's just me and my story and getting undiluted support and getting to talk it out loud. And so this with you, Megan, going, life is going so fast right now and there's so many moving pieces. Going to therapy is, it's just, it's gonna be this like magical way for you to integrate and fully
Papa Rick (01:13:49.091)
Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (01:13:50.801)
Heck yeah!
Megan Jackson (01:13:56.964)
Absolutely.
Papa Rick (01:13:57.732)
Mm-hmm.
Papa Rick (01:14:07.291)
Bye.
Jennifer Hayes (01:14:15.194)
feel everything because everything is going so fast right now. And having that space and that time, even if it's just one hour a week, to go integrate everything into your body and it gets to become part of you. And you get to step forward as a fully integrated human being who knows who she is and knows what she's doing. And you can navigate life differently.
Megan Jackson (01:14:15.966)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:14:23.993)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (01:14:31.495)
Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (01:14:36.962)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:14:43.876)
Yeah, beautiful. Yeah, yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:14:44.982)
with that.
Papa Rick (01:14:46.151)
Yeah. Another tool you don't, and it's not like it all happens in one meeting, right? You deal, depending upon what you're needing to integrate and work through, it takes, you've got to go baby steps. You know, you take a piece of it and work on what you can work on. And maybe you have to work on that for a while and you keep at it. You persevere.
Megan Jackson (01:14:57.037)
Absolutely.
Megan Jackson (01:15:07.064)
You know, to that point, I think too, what I love is the revealing piece of therapy. So like you get in there and you know, it's like an onion with layers. You start pulling back these layers and you're like, dang, like I didn't even know that was still up in there. I didn't, you know, and oh, that's why, yeah, that's why I talked to my son this way. Or that's why I react this way. Like, you know, so it's, it's, it's so interesting. All of this.
Papa Rick (01:15:14.479)
Hmm.
Jennifer Hayes (01:15:20.732)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Papa Rick (01:15:21.952)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:15:24.754)
Yes! Like, oh my God, where did that come from? Ha ha!
Papa Rick (01:15:25.019)
That's right.
Jennifer Hayes (01:15:31.434)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (01:15:32.912)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:15:37.160)
wrapped into one, you know, with your own mental health. You gotta be the best you so that you can be the best version of you for your children and the likes. So yeah. Full circle, yes, yes. For real, for real.
Papa Rick (01:15:40.378)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:15:45.270)
Yes.
Jennifer Hayes (01:15:48.758)
Yes. Full circle. Full circle. Ha ha ha.
Papa Rick (01:15:50.307)
Yeah, there's all kinds of tools.
Papa Rick (01:15:55.243)
I took a class, Peter Scazzaro, Emotionally Healthy Relationships, and discovered a tool I'd never seen before. It had to do with Geno something or other. It's about diagramming your family, right? Again, boxes, it resonated with me. It's boxes and arrows, and then different kinds of lines. Like this is my, this was this relation, this relationship was like that, and that was like that, you know.
Megan Jackson (01:16:04.741)
Mm-hmm.
Megan Jackson (01:16:19.961)
Bye!
Jennifer Hayes (01:16:19.978)
All right.
Papa Rick (01:16:22.467)
And I remember doing therapy after my brother died. I got super depressed after my replacement father died. My older brother kind of took that over and messed me up when he died unexpectedly. And just like you're talking about, sitting there talking with a therapist, it was like cognitive behavioral therapy. And so you're thinking it through and having exactly that kind of reaction to
Megan Jackson (01:16:26.152)
Hmm.
Megan Jackson (01:16:48.364)
Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Papa Rick (01:16:49.927)
Oh, that's where that, you know, why do you think that way? Why do you feel that way? And going, Oh, that's where that comes from. You know, where you don't come up with it on your own. It's like talking to a friend who's not only good at listening, but at coming back with, Oh, what about this? You know, leading you a little bit down. Hey, you're a human being. I don't know you. I don't know your life, but 90% of my clients, the, what do you, what do you think about that? And helping you find the tender spot.
Megan Jackson (01:16:54.704)
Yep. Yep. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:17:05.480)
Yeah. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:17:07.627)
Uh huh.
Megan Jackson (01:17:15.204)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:17:18.140)
that part. Yeah. Yep. Absolutely. Absolutely.
Papa Rick (01:17:19.175)
Oh, oh yeah, that's where it hurts. Okay. Thanks doc.
Jennifer Hayes (01:17:24.374)
And therapists, like, I just want to draw this line for everybody. A therapist, I mean, they go through schooling, they go through all kinds of training, et cetera. But the key for me in my experience with therapy, the key talent of a therapist or the key characteristic in a therapist is curiosity. I wonder where that's coming from.
Megan Jackson (01:17:48.985)
Mm-hmm. Yes.
Jennifer Hayes (01:17:53.438)
And it's not like, how does that make you feel? Like if that's the only question your therapist asks you, that's not a good therapist. But a therapist who knows how to ask the right question so that you find the answer inside of yourself because the answer isn't the same for everybody. And yes, there's statistics and like 90% of people who have that thought also experienced this type of trauma or whatever the statistic is, but that's...
Papa Rick (01:17:54.255)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:17:55.488)
Right? Yeah. Yeah.
Papa Rick (01:18:12.309)
That's exactly right.
Megan Jackson (01:18:18.193)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:18:22.282)
That is also a parenting characteristic. Being able to approach your children with curiosity instead of making assumptions about what's happening for them, that is such a huge, and it's a huge piece of being a friend, of being a partner in marriage, of being a good sounding board for anyone that you love, is instead of making assumptions or judgments about what someone's bringing you, get curious.
Megan Jackson (01:18:24.816)
Yes.
Megan Jackson (01:18:30.312)
That's good, yeah.
Papa Rick (01:18:32.583)
That's right. That's right.
Megan Jackson (01:18:37.008)
Yes.
Megan Jackson (01:18:44.997)
Yeah.
Papa Rick (01:18:45.903)
problem solving any kind of
Megan Jackson (01:18:51.112)
Let's get curious.
Papa Rick (01:18:54.031)
Any kind of analytical pursuit that even, that even holds true with linear accounting, where's the, where's the balance sheet off or computer programming? Why isn't that working or any kind of problem solving? You know, that involves a, you wonder where it came from. Right. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:18:54.955)
Like.
Megan Jackson (01:19:02.668)
Yeah. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:19:07.633)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:19:09.538)
We don't go, oh, the numbers are wrong. We go, my math is wrong. So instead of something's wrong with this person and making some kind of judgment, it's like, oh, maybe my perception, my judgment, the story's in my head. I'm going to put those aside and ask some questions.
Megan Jackson (01:19:11.847)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:19:16.472)
Right.
Megan Jackson (01:19:23.865)
right?
Papa Rick (01:19:25.148)
Okay.
Megan Jackson (01:19:26.904)
Absolutely. I love it. Y'all got me amped up. Yeah, it really is. I'm excited.
Papa Rick (01:19:27.823)
Yeah, yeah, and pick it apart.
Jennifer Hayes (01:19:29.310)
And that is a conflict skill.
Papa Rick (01:19:33.199)
The therapist, the therapist, the therapist don't know anything about you. They know something about 900 other people they talked about. All they can do is say, well, 700 of those people, you know, had had some kind of trauma. You know, I had something in comma or five things among five things of common. And they can kind of go, well, you know, you're a human being. You're not from Mars. Uh, what are the chances you're like other human beings? And.
Jennifer Hayes (01:19:37.856)
Woo.
Megan Jackson (01:19:49.296)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:19:57.413)
Absolutely.
Papa Rick (01:20:03.407)
Sometimes it works, sometimes it's not perfect, but it's really just talking with somebody that can help you talk, that's talked through that before. You know, first time you do a project, if you're a handyman, you know, the first time you take a dryer apart and put it back together, it takes a while, you know. Second time, it goes a lot faster, you know, it's good to, and the repairman does it like it's not, it's nothing, it's like if you've done it 50 times before, just think of them as technicians, you know, not to minimize things.
Megan Jackson (01:20:04.242)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:20:08.290)
Absolutely.
Megan Jackson (01:20:17.244)
Oof. Yeah, yeah. Hey, hey, hey. Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:20:26.436)
Absolutely. Second nature, yeah.
Papa Rick (01:20:33.411)
But they'll get, they'll, they, it's very helpful to go talk to people.
Megan Jackson (01:20:35.608)
I love it. I like the way your brain works with the logical piece of this to draw the line so you can see it. Yeah. Yeah, that's exactly what it is. Yeah. Yeah, I like it.
Jennifer Hayes (01:20:42.626)
the man brain, the boxes and the check marks and the line and women were like, it all goes like this. Ha ha ha.
Papa Rick (01:20:42.787)
Well, you got the girls, you know, I don't care, I'm mansplaining to everybody. Yeah. There's just, they just come from, you know, it's good to see it from different perspectives, I think, you know, hopefully there's some guy parents watching, you know, hopefully this isn't all the girls, you know, get some guys involved here, you know.
Megan Jackson (01:20:54.924)
Absolutely, yeah, absolutely.
Jennifer Hayes (01:21:01.130)
Right, hopefully there's dads.
Megan Jackson (01:21:01.152)
My hubby will for sure so there's one yeah absolutely yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:21:06.666)
Yeah. All right, friends, there's a few. So I want to make sure Megan, um, that let's see, we're going to put ever all of your links in the show notes. Um, and we are also, you are offering a 10% off code for anyone who orders the book and uses the code relational parenting. So exciting. I am now a discount code.
Megan Jackson (01:21:28.290)
Yes.
Papa Rick (01:21:30.215)
Code. Cool. Hey!
Megan Jackson (01:21:34.317)
Yes. Yeah. That's it.
Jennifer Hayes (01:21:36.806)
making it making it. Right. So we have so we'll have your the clothing brand will have the link to all the websites all the things. And then that discount code will also be up there for anyone to use. I just want to remind everybody that we do now have a Patreon
Papa Rick (01:21:39.311)
Part of the system. Part of the system.
Megan Jackson (01:21:57.167)
Awesome.
Jennifer Hayes (01:22:03.094)
So head on over to that. It's the relational parent. Is it that? Is it the relational parent coach? I'm gonna have to edit this. I think it's the.
Papa Rick (01:22:13.927)
I think that's right. I think that's right. You better get your branding squared away, young lady.
Megan Jackson (01:22:17.596)
Hahaha
Jennifer Hayes (01:22:18.986)
Well, so everything for the podcast has been the relational parenting podcast, but I made the Patreon and the membership the Relational Parent Coach, which is the rest of my branding. So I'm just forgetting what I made it. So anyway, the relational.
Papa Rick (01:22:27.991)
I think, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:22:32.920)
Will you be able to share what comes with that to exactly what it is that comes with that part?
Jennifer Hayes (01:22:39.838)
Yeah. So the five, the $5 level is you get a shout out on the show. Um, so our shout out this week is my dad being our pop a Rick, a shout out. Thank you for supporting our podcast.
Megan Jackson (01:22:49.673)
Yeah, yeah, Papa Rick, let's go.
Papa Rick (01:22:50.910)
Hahaha!
Papa Rick (01:22:58.327)
I just wanted to make sure it works. I'm kind of semi-technical. Like, is this all hooked up right? Okay, good.
Megan Jackson (01:22:59.812)
I love it.
Jennifer Hayes (01:23:01.165)
Um...
Jennifer Hayes (01:23:04.206)
Right. And then the $7 tier is going to be a shout out as well as I think like a blooper reel, or, you know, we'll put some extra access to extra anecdotal things in there. And then the $11 tier is
Jennifer Hayes (01:23:29.934)
is going to be like, we're going to start sending out merch, I think. So I'll have, you'll have access to the blooper reels. You'll have access first access to things like my membership once that is live, which it's a wait list right now. So if you want to get on the wait list for that, you can also go to the Patreon and get on the wait list for the membership. And yeah, we'll have blooper reels. We'll start doing merch boxes for
Megan Jackson (01:23:46.541)
Nice.
Papa Rick (01:23:56.131)
Maybe we can pass out culture cards or little books someday, or all the guests, all the stuff that they get, right?
Megan Jackson (01:23:59.784)
Oh, yeah. A nice collab. I love it. Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:24:06.678)
Right? We could do like a drawing for, we could, anyone who's in the $11 tier, we could put your name in a bucket, do drawing for merch from guests. Yeah. So head over to Patreon, check that out. There's also gonna be a link for it in the show notes. So just go to the show notes, click the link, and it'll take you right there. Yeah. Megan, is there like...
Megan Jackson (01:24:11.516)
That would be awesome.
Papa Rick (01:24:13.987)
There you go. There you go.
Megan Jackson (01:24:16.025)
Let's do it!
Megan Jackson (01:24:19.778)
Yes, I love that.
Jennifer Hayes (01:24:36.798)
Anything else that you want to say to anybody?
Megan Jackson (01:24:39.140)
I just want to say thank you both. I mean, this has been fun just to talk and hang out. Like, you know, it's not every day that you get to kick it with friends and their parent, like, you know, and Papa Rick, you're so cool, you know? So I'm for real just grateful for the opportunity and excited for where this show is going to go and where I know that I'm headed, like it's up, it's up, you know, and so I'm excited.
Papa Rick (01:24:55.630)
Thank you.
Jennifer Hayes (01:25:06.498)
Yeah.
Megan Jackson (01:25:08.284)
to be going on the journey with y'all, you know? A year from now, we're gonna be like, wow, do you remember when, you know? So I'm excited. Yeah. Yes, yes. So it's been great. What, oh my God, I can't even imagine, I'm excited. But yeah, I'm just grateful. Thank you guys. I'm on Facebook, Instagram, Miss MJ Official. Yeah, and like,
Jennifer Hayes (01:25:11.383)
Right?
Jennifer Hayes (01:25:15.594)
right? We'll have to like we'll bring you back. We'll bring you back like next April and be like what's happening now? Yeah. Yeah.
Papa Rick (01:25:16.111)
Yeah, yeah.
Papa Rick (01:25:23.771)
What's new?
Papa Rick (01:25:27.035)
Yeah, yeah.
Papa Rick (01:25:35.175)
Vagert högt här.
Megan Jackson (01:25:37.084)
Jen was saying, I am very authentic. So for the most part, you get positive Megan because that's usually where I'm at. But there are some times where you get Megan, and so it is what it is. Yes, absolutely. So yeah, I'm grateful and thank you guys so much. Words of magic, relational parenting code for 10%.
Jennifer Hayes (01:25:41.559)
now.
Jennifer Hayes (01:25:45.227)
Yeah.
Jennifer Hayes (01:25:49.323)
right?
Papa Rick (01:25:50.791)
That's educational too. That's a good thing.
Jennifer Hayes (01:26:02.242)
Love it. Thank you, Megan. You are like, you're so uplifting and your words are life-giving. So that's so powerful. Yeah. Awesome. All right. Bye everybody.
Megan Jackson (01:26:03.484)
Thank you guys.
Papa Rick (01:26:03.491)
Thank you.
Megan Jackson (01:26:09.172)
Awesome. I'm glad to know. Thank you both so much. Appreciate it.
Papa Rick (01:26:11.142)
Nice.
Megan Jackson (01:26:18.686)
Bye!