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In Ecclesiastes 3:11, we read that God makes everything beautiful in its time. It is comforting to know that nothing is wasted in God's economy, but all of it will be used for our good and His glory. You're invited to join us for poignant conversations and compelling interviews centered on believing for His beauty in every season.
Welcome to the Everything Made Beautiful podcast with Shannon Scott. This program is sponsored by Kava, home of streaming Bible studies, teaching series, and workshops to deepen your faith. Check them out at kava .tv. And now on with the show.
Well, welcome back to the Everything Made Beautiful podcast. I just want to say again, thank you so much for listening, for watching, for sharing, for commenting. I'm having so much fun. And so much of it is the interaction with you guys and what I hear from you about how God has met you through something that you have heard here. And I just want to say thank you. It's a joy to be able
do this thing that I've wanted to do for a long time and your engagement in it has meant the world to me. So just want to be somebody who says thank you out loud when I feel gratitude and that is absolutely what I feel around this podcast. So thank you. Today we are going to talk about something that bless their hearts. The women at our church have heard me talk about for years now and that is this considering the upstream principle.
And so this was born out of a conversation that I had with my husband, Jeff, many years ago when I was experiencing what I would call extreme frustration with a relationship in my life. This woman and I were in relationship, something small happened, yet her response to it was a, in my estimation, gross overreaction.
to what was going on. Like it was not at all in line with, even if she had been offended at what happened, it was not in line with a normal response given the level of offense. And so I came home from experiencing the other side of her overreaction.
And I was venting and I can't believe this and can you believe that to my husband? And as I was in my venting, he said to me really sweetly, if you know Jeff, he just doesn't get real amped. And so just really sweetly and peacefully, he said, huh, I wonder what's in her upstream. And of course I was mid rant. And so I'm like, what? And he said,
I just wonder what's in her upstream. He said, Shannon, something has happened or some things have happened to her around her that have caused her to have such a bruise there where you offended her. It was already a bruise from something. Otherwise she wouldn't have responded the way she did. So I wonder what's in her upstream. And I said,
I don't know. He said, well, I wonder if you knew what was in her upstream, if you might have more empathy or compassion for her and know how to relate with her a little bit better. And, you know, you never want to hear wisdom and sound reasoning in those moments. And so I am not sure that I took it as well as I should have at that time, but it has stuck with me because he's right.
If I had known what was in her upstream, then her response to me, number one, wouldn't have felt so personal, and number two, would have been informed by what I already knew about her. And so I did a little digging and I did find out what was in her upstream and she had had such a difficult road and much of her overreaction to me.
was because what we were talking about and what I had said had pressed on a very, very soft spot for her, a bruise for her that had not healed. I don't know if you can relate to my friend. I certainly can. I have places in me that when something presses on them, my reaction is outside my normal way of being in the world.
And as I have considered it over the years, as I've sat with women over the years, as I've gotten much, much older, and as I've just lived a lot of life, I have realized that this is something that if you and I can embrace this principle of considering the upstream, then we will find over time
that there are not as many of those confounding relationship fractures or misunderstandings or why does this always happen to me sorts of things. Because when we're considering others and considering their upstream, but even more so when we understand our own upstream, it can help us start to relate in a much healthier way in the world.
So when we look at our lives, it's easy to see ourselves as isolated events or moments. We can plot the moments and events of our lives and think that they kind of exist in isolation. Well, that happened over there or that happened back then and it doesn't impact me now. But the truth is we are products of a complex upstream, an intricate web of experiences and influences and relationships
And all of those things shape who we are. So each of us carries within us the imprints of our past, yet we don't have to be defined by it. Instead, we can be informed by it, not infected by it, and it allows us to navigate our present and hopefully our future in a much more intelligent way.
emotionally and otherwise. Scripter tells us in Romans 828, we know that all things work together for good for those who love God who are called by him according to his purpose. And the profound truth of that reminds us
every part of our upstream, every joy and every sorrow, every success, every failure. It all is woven together for our good by the hand of God who is sovereign as we've already discussed on this podcast. So we can be reassured that our past, no matter how difficult, does not have to infect our present or determine our future.
If we consider, let's say, Joseph in scripture, a man whose upstream was marked by betrayal, slavery, disappointment, imprisonment, unfair and untrue accusation, his brothers sold him into slavery out of jealousy, and he endured years of hardship and injustice.
is Joseph's upstream, yet he does not let that past define him. Instead, it informed his actions and his faith in God's plan all throughout the narrative of Joseph. We see scripture say, the Lord was with Joseph. At the end of Genesis, in Genesis 50 verse 20, I
Joseph says to his brothers when they discover who he is, what you intended for evil, God intended for good, for the saving of many lives. So as Joseph reflected on his life, as he considered everything that was in his upstream, it was clear to him that even the most painful parts of his past were part of a greater purpose. And so our upstream
is not just about the events that happen to us, but also how we respond to them. Philippians 3, 13 and 14 is the apostle Paul saying, brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do, forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.
Paul understood that while we can't change our past, and if anybody had wanted to change their past, my guess is it was Paul. He can choose and we can choose to look forward, to press on with our eyes fixed on the future that God has prepared for us. And it doesn't mean forgetting what is behind in the sense of, yeah, I don't really know what happened. But instead choosing,
to not let what is behind infect what is in front of us. So it's important to acknowledge that our past has shaped us, the trials and tribulations we have faced have molded our character and given us strength in the way that most other things do not. I don't tend to learn the most in the easy, joyful,
Just everything's going my way, everything's coming up roses, seasons of my life. I learn the most, and I believe you do as well, in suffering and trial and hardship, when we must endure and hold fast, rather than just float through life on the blessings God has brought our way. The nice thing about seasons is that they come to pass. so hardship and trial and suffering are not the only
parts of our story, but they are the ones that I believe mold our character and shape us into who we are in a way that we would not be were it not for those trials and those seasons of suffering. James chapter one verses two through four encourages us when it says, consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know,
that the testing of your faith produces perseverance and let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete and lacking nothing. So our experiences, both good and bad, are tools that God uses to refine us, to make us mature and complete. The best news for us is that we're not prisoners of our past. We're not prisoners of our upstream.
The old has gone, the new has come, scripture says in 2 Corinthians 5 17. Our identity is not rooted in the sum of our past experiences, how we've been treated, what has happened to us and how we feel about it. Our identity is rooted in the transformative power of Jesus Christ, his love, his grace, his mercy over us that we've received. So that
identity empowers us to break free and not be defined by the chains of our past, but to forgive ourselves and therefore others and to step into the future with hope and confidence. When I think about that season with that sweet woman and my understanding of all that God had asked her to carry and steward and endure,
immediately had compassion for her. I immediately had empathy for her. It made me aware of the way I related to her initially to be a caretaker of what I now understood about her story. And so I would just invite you to think about your life. Think about your upstream.
I would even encourage you to spend some time with the Lord and a blank piece of paper. Maybe it's a blank space in your journal. Maybe it's at the back. And I would encourage you to start journaling your upstream. When I was in some counseling with a gentleman many years ago, he had me plot my life, highs and lows. And just to go through and kind of on a continuum, plot
great experiences and my terrible experiences and any that jumped out in between. And so I just went through the timeline of my life and I plotted highs, lows, you know, when I experienced this and this place and this was a few of the details surrounding it. And then I would, when I experienced this in this place and a few of the details surrounding it. And it was so interesting when I stepped back from that, the
pattern that I could see emerge in my upstream. Many of my undesirable experiences, I would call them, were all a little bit along the same theme. And my highs, the things that I pointed to of experiencing in life, you know, separate from getting married and having children, obviously those were highs, but kind
vocationally in what I was undertaking in work and ministry, my highs tended to have a lot of the same themes. And the other thing that I noticed was that often my lows and the things that I experienced were somewhat related to my highs. So the things that I loved engaging in also were
things or the scenarios where I experienced some of the most profound pain, if that makes sense. So it was almost that the source of my greatest joy was also the source of my greatest sorrow. And isn't that always the case? The thing we love the most has the potential to wound us the most. And as I stepped back from that timeline and I looked at my life and in effect
upstream, I began to be able to see patterns emerge in my life where I could then walk forward much more intelligently regarding myself, my story, my proclivities to respond this way or that way, given this or that thing that would happen. It also allowed me to know, okay,
As I go forward, there are going to be more times where this thing gets triggered in me. And I have an opportunity to either be defeated in that moment or to experience some victory in that moment by choosing to surrender it to the Lord and asking him to help me process it in a way that's healthy and doesn't bleed all over the people around me. So if you sit down,
and you ask the Holy Spirit to begin bringing to your mind the highs and lows of life, and you just kind of draw yourself a timeline and you start plotting those highs and lows. I believe that as you do that, you will begin to get a fairly robust and intelligent informed picture of your upstream. Most of us can sit down and tell you something that happened to us.
But I don't know how often we sit and we take really an inventory of our lives and ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to us something we may not have known or a deeper experience of something we only knew on the surface. So if you plot your life, if you get a picture of your upstream, what patterns will begin to emerge? What will it tell you?
about the way that you experience life. What will it tell you about the relational difficulties that you've experienced and why? And it may be something that you need to do in counseling. It may be something that you need to do with a pastor or a really wise friend. But I'm telling you, I know the situations I can put myself in and I know the situations that I should avoid.
like the plague, I'm still learning and still implementing and still fine tuning what God is asking of me to ensure that I'm able to exercise faithfulness over the long haul in what he's asking of me. And one of those ways is to not be defeated by my upstream. If I just go around triggered, reacting and offended all the time,
then I'm not going to be effective at what God has asked me to pursue. I'm going to be someone who has highs and then fizzles out and maybe does something else and then fizzles out. And then maybe it undertakes something and thinks this time it'll be different and then has a bad experience and fizzles out. That is not what I want for my life. I'm trying to teach our children that that is not what they
for their lives. They want to be people who are intelligent about the way God has made them and intelligent about the experiences they've had and intelligent about the way God has made them and the experiences they've had and how those two things have intersected and what it has shaped in them for what God is going to ask of them over the long haul. When we get to know people and we understand their upstream
we are given an opportunity not only to develop relationally with another person, but to embrace empathy and compassion because you and I, all of us are products of everything that has happened to us, both good and bad. And most of what has happened to us has been unto the end of shaping us for what God has made us for. So I would encourage you, plot your life.
Figure out what's in your upstream. How does it inform how you respond? If you are like me, you have probably had people along your life who have given you feedback on yourself or your personality. Some of them have been unfortunate times of feedback where it was not delivered in a way that was helpful or in a way that was affirming or encouraging to me.
But other times I have had really trusted people say very difficult things to me about how I show up in the world. And when I look at my upstream, I understand why. And so then I can surrender those things to the Lord and ask him to refine that part of me to help me engage in a way that's healthy. And I can in wisdom kind of buffer myself and ensure I don't place myself in situations.
where those triggers are going to be pressed on all the time. So that's my encouragement to you today. It's not necessarily huge or profound, but it has been so helpful to us in our home. We say consider the upstream a lot. When my kids are dealing with issues with other kids at school or in friend groups, we say what's in their upstream. So how can you consider
own upstream today and how might considering the upstream of the people in your life and the people you interact with cause you to embrace a spirit of empathy and compassion for people as you relate to them. So remember considering our upstream is not about erasing our past but about understanding its impact and allowing God to use it for our growth and his glory.
So let's embrace our history, let's learn from it, and let's move forward with the assurance that God is with us, working all things together for our good. Our past is part of our story, but it doesn't have to dictate our story. It is not necessarily our destiny. It is just part of our story. We are new creations. We are continually being made new and being sanctified and being shaped by our master's hand.
we can know that our best days are yet to come because that is true. Thanks so much for being with us today. I'm praying for you as you go on this journey. I have found it to be one of the most helpful things that if I will keep this in front of me, I will tend to operate in the grace of God, in the grace of Jesus, in my relating with other people, and in my understanding
of the situations I find myself in. I want us to be people who are not victims of our circumstances, slaves of our past, or who just throw our hands up and say, well, this is just the way that I am. Instead, I want us to be people who are continually pressing in, asking God to refine us, to shape us, and to help us see a vision.
for who he's called us to be and how the way he's wired us will help us be those people. So I hope this has been helpful for you today as you consider your upstream. I'd love to hear from you. Feel free to reach out to me. You can do that at just info at shannonsuzannescott .com or you can post a comment on social media. But it's always encouraging to my faith to hear how God is meeting you in your faith and I
the reverse is true. Have a great day and don't forget to be on the lookout for the way that God is making everything beautiful, including you. We'll see you next
Thanks for joining us for Everything Made Beautiful. We are so grateful for your willingness to tune in. Be sure to follow, rate, and download the podcast and check out the show notes for additional links and resources from today's episode. You can follow Everything Made Beautiful podcast on Instagram and Facebook and can subscribe to Shannon's writing on Substack. This information and more is available at shannonsusannscott .com. See you next time.