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Parenting for the future shouldn't feel like guessing in the dark. Weaving her experience as a global futurist, TEDx pioneer and mother of three thriving young adults, Nancy Giordano shares tangible perspectives, real-life stories, and the people you need to know in a quest to explore how kids and families can step confidently into life, work and the world ahead. From developing critical thinking and problem-solving in infancy to confidently facing emerging digital and cultural challenges as they grow, the Futurist(Mom) is your insightful companion for preparing your child for a dynamic and unpredictable world. Tune in and join the conversation on how we can best equip our kids for the future, one episode at a time.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: Hey, I'm so excited, Eric Coleman, that I get to have this conversation with you.
It was really fun that, you know, we orbit around each other in Austin and have for many years run into each other at the airport every once in a while.
But we haven't had time for lunch in quite some time.
And just last week we got to be the same client event in Philadelphia.
And it was really great to see you in action and to to see how resonant your message is about focus and around navigating, you know, the change in this.
A very tender moment in time.
But now I'm excited that we get to have you here helping us launch this podcast.
I don't know about you, but you know, after I give a talk, often parents come up or people come up to me in the role of parent and talk to me about what's going on for their kids as much as what's going on in their offices or in their lives.
And so this is an opportunity for us to be able to direct the conversation specifically to that side of where people are in their worlds right now.
So thank you.
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: No thank you.
No, I love it.
And you're right.
It's funny 'cause I was just in I was speaking in San Antonio and then I was with the speaking bureau that brought me in.
They were there when people came and asked me questions and a lot of 'em were dad parenting questions.
And so they were taken aback.
'cause I just talked about future proofing you, artificial intelligence.
And so he was just taken aback.
Wow.
Like a lot of those questions were more personal.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: Right, because I think that, you know, I, when I, you know, give my talks, I always talk about the, there's sort of a nested system, right?
It's us as a professional, which sits inside another bigger circle, which is us as humans, which sits inside a bigger circle, which is us as members of society.
And we think that people are only gonna constrain their understanding of their questions in the first circle.
And the reality is they're thinking across all those things, and the boundaries between these things are becoming much more porous.
Right.
When you and I had breakfast together, we spent a lot of time talking about parenting in this modern era right now.
And some of the questions and challenges, and I think it's also fascinating that here you are, you know, speaking in 55 countries around the world really as a very lauded insight and motivational speaker around these times.
But you're also a dad.
Right.
And a spouse, but you've got two young girls that are, one's in middle school and one's in high school, and so you're living it at the same time that we're talking it.
You know, I am a little on the outside edge of having my kids be in the house and in school.
So this is a very pointed conversation when we start to imagine.
But the world is changing fast.
Right.
And you have a great video that you show in your talks that give a bunch of stats, but what is there one compelling stat that you can kind of like sums up.
You know what?
We don't fully appreciate about how much is happening in this world right now.
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Yeah, I think that we're having more conversations with bots and with our spouse, and so you can see that trickle down to your kids and
grandkids, and so.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: So that's an actual stat that we're having more conversations with the bots than with our spouses.
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Correct.
Yeah.
We're having more conversations with bots and with
our spouse.
And I'm sure if we double clicked on that, that might also hold true with your kids.
And the stat that always hits me hard with your kids is that 80% of the time you're spending with them is before they're 18.
And so I'm very cognizant to make sure I'm taking advantage of all these minutes that I can, and part of that's communication.
So in a hyperconnected world, it's very easy for us to be lonely.
That's true for our kids as well.
So as parents, we need to be aware of what our behavior is showcasing to them.
So if we're at a stoplight, are we checking our phone?
Oh, we're stopped.
I can check my phone.
Oh, I just caused the three cars behind me to miss the left turn.
'cause I was checking my phone.
I didn't know it turned green.
So it's really what behaviors are we showcasing to our children?
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: So you're very conscious of that all the time as you run around and are.
Spending your time with them.
When you obvious say, it's interesting you say it's about not about doing more, but doing what matters.
So how does that translate to when you're a parent?
So this is what you're saying here is when you're at a traffic light, right, that you're really conscious with them.
What are the other moments where you really think about it, like you're conscious of it?
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Yeah, I mean it's like the not so simple art of doing less comma better.
So I'm conscious of it at the table.
Am I making sure the technology's off?
But really I'd rather have an hour where I'm fully present with my kids than three hours where I'm in and out.
'cause
you're not really present.
And so it's important for you to know, hey, this window is for my kids.
Right now, this is that window, nothing else.
And so that's the key is to make sure you're not quote unquote, like multitasking with your kids' time.
And so that's the thing I'm most cognizant of and it's hard to do.
I'm not perfect at it, so I catch myself often and have to pause and go, okay, it's time to be present.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: So you.
You know, have built so much of your career around focus and around this importance of focus.
Every time I walk through the airport in Austin, your book is right there, my friend, with your big bright green glasses.
Welcome me and me think more about how I need to be more focused.
So what, you're doing this in an age of hyper distraction, right?
I mean, to your point, I get pings on my phone online.
Do you get alerts on your phone or have you the kind of guy who's turned 'em all off?
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: I have 'em off to a fault sometimes, so I just have it muted and so it's off to a fault.
But the other day, it's crazy.
My daughter called me when I was on stage.
It might've been when I was in Philadelphia, I can't remember.
But that rarely happens.
And I, my wife had to her mom was having surgery, so she was out of town.
So the kids actually had to get up.
I had a flight at four, so the kids had to get up on their own and get themselves to school, which their first time they've had to do that when neither of us are there
because neither of them drives, right?
They're too young to drive.
And so I get this call on stage and it did alert me on my watch because I think I have just alerts for my kids if they
called me in that moment.
And then it never happened in 15 years.
My oldest is 15 and so.
Fortunately, I'm a video storyteller, so when I was playing one of the videos, I quickly my daughter and she replied to me.
So I actually called her when I was on stage and muted my microphone, and she said, everything's okay.
She had like a, it was something that wasn't important, but I, like, my heart sank, but I was like, oh my gosh, I'm calling my daughter while I'm giving a keynote.
But fortunately, I had, I fortunately turned the mic off and I was playing a 92nd video, so I quickly called her.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: That is so funny.
I'm trying to imagine you on stage doing that.
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Like it just, it was like my phone was in my backpack down.
I had to call from my watch.
That's why I got alerted because I only have alerts for
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: I just, I think the irony of a man who's talking about focus and giving a talk during the middle, I mean, giving a call from his watch in the middle of a keynote does make me
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Because I had just for those two, those are the only two that I had.
If they, a call came in for either of them and I told them that, and I
forgot what I gotta ask her.
I forgot what it was mean.
It wasn't important.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: right, right, right, right.
But it is funny, right, that they have the instant access.
Well, I think that part of the reason I keep alerts on my phone, honestly, is 'cause my daughter, who's 2122 has 'em on her phone.
And so I feel like if there is some really, you know, dark headline that is coming across, and there's many of them right now, I feel like she's seeing them too.
And I wanna have a chance to connect with her around it or anticipate that I'll get a call around it.
Or if nothing else, just understand all the stuff that's coming in for her because she hasn't turned them off.
And so I think that's an interesting thing around focus too, is you know, choices that we're making to be connected versus be completely whatever the word is turned off from that stuff.
Right.
And so again, in this world of like, like encouraging and you know, constant distractions, I'm assuming your business is doing really well, or do you find people pushing against it and saying, there's just no way,
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Yeah no, it's great.
I mean, for me, I'm the type of guy that you would run into it.
I would've missed if without my wife and my cool daughters, I wouldn't have known the Coldplay, that whole meme till like day five.
And so sometimes.
I'm more on the extreme, but I know I've always, my thought is after doing the focus project, 'cause I did that for two years and wrote the book, if it's important enough, it'll find me.
So that's just my philosophy.
It's if important enough, it'll find me.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: Fair enough.
All right, so when we start talking then again about the kinds of challenges that are gonna be coming at families, right?
With all of the media that sits inside the house and as they're trying to figure out how to decide whether or not their kids should have phones or not have phones beyond computers.
Not on beyond computers.
I guess sort of your thinking about how you've approached it as a parent and or guidance that you give other people as to, are there hard set rules?
Are there you know, sort of how would one apply your research and thinking to my daily home with teens?
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Yeah.
Daily with teens or with your kids.
So just so you know if it was up for a vote and I'm upset with myself that I wanna drive this, I wanna be more of a movement.
There should be an age gap limit, like a Gate 16, I think, for social media.
Just to give these kids a fighting chance.
And so if you ask me, I would love that.
I think it's one thing that most people, almost every parent would raise their hand and say, yes,
please.
So until that day comes, it's, you've gotta figure out what works best for you and your kids.
For us, we've got certain rules that the phone charges centrally downstairs.
Their rooms are upstairs, so the phones are not up there.
After nine o'clock, they're being charged, and that applies too when they have sleepovers.
And so my wife and I do rock paper scissors for who's gonna be the uncool parent.
That has to go in to these super popular girls and tell them, I need your phone.
And it's kind of a personal thing.
They're handing over their phone.
There's a lot of stuff I look, I'm not gonna look at it.
I'm gonna charge it.
I'm just taking 'em to charge.
And then they have a great time, right?
They have to interact, engage without those devices.
And so that's just a known rule that we have, and it's been very helpful.
The other thing is we tried to, like we talked about earlier, show versus tell.
It's the old adage that kids might not listen to what you say, but they certainly watch what you do.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: Right.
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: And so are you texting when you're driving?
If you have a 10-year-old, they're watching that.
And so when they come 15 and have their permit, they think that's normal behavior.
And so it's depends.
You've gotta model the behavior you wanna see.
That's not always easy to do.
And so no one's perfect at it.
So that's why in the book, the focus project, that's all about progress versus perfection,
it's really thinking about those ups and downs like a rollercoaster day to day.
But over time, that line continues to go up, that you are getting better at focus and getting better at showing your children how to focus.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: So when you think about the role that AI is gonna continuously play, right now we're talking about like, lemme just back up on the social media thing.
Just my perspective on it.
And I'm sure if someone listens to 10 of these episodes, they're gonna hear me say this every single time.
But for me it's not about the technology, right?
It's the way that it's being commercialized and distributed.
And I think that this idea of wanting to have a technology that connects us to one another and lets us share things with one another is a very human extension of the way that we wanna be you know, in, in whatever, in cahoots with one another.
But when it has been weaponized to be an aggressive tool to bring out the worst in us, right?
As an advertising, delivery mechanism.
So for me, I hold advertisers responsible.
I hold investors responsible.
I hold the data scientists that are paid, you know, gazillions of dollars to be able to make this thing super, super addictive and sticky, responsible.
My children are older than yours and so mine are actually grateful that they got introduced to social media before it had that kind of grip on.
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Yeah.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: Right.
And it was not considered as, as aggressive as it is now.
It's sort of just an early days thing where people kind of figure out like what an Instagram was and they're really relieved that they got to experiment with it.
So the age thing is one thing, but the age thing is because we're gating it against a predatory and industry as opposed to, you know, like giving potato chips for your kids when they're 16 or whatever.
Like we're trying to teach them in some ways digital hygiene around that, trying to help them understand that this is being used to, to, you know, to exploit them and to stalk them in ways that I wish that they didn't have to fear tech companies so much.
That to me is one piece of it.
We start to imagine gating in the and so you're right, I think parents are figuring out, okay, in that kind of predatory environment, what are ways that I can try and push against it?
And one of which is potentially an age limit.
One is having those kinds of rules hoping that your parent, kids', parents also, want to do that.
You know, the friend's parents are kind of aligned.
We're seeing, you know, in some households around the country now return to the analog phone.
Have you seen the landline phone?
Right.
Because kids are also realizing, and this is where I think that's really interesting, kids partly wanna be able to still have access
to be able to talk to their friends, but they're also realizing they don't wanna be surveilled and they don't wanna be recorded.
And you talk a lot about the digital footprint and the reputation, right.
That students have.
And so the idea that they can say anything they want on a landline phone and not worry that it's somehow gonna end up.
All over somewhere else.
So I also think it's really interesting to see when things become even more predatory or the way in which it's used becomes more aggressive.
We're figuring out ways to balance it back.
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: No, you're right.
And to double click on that a little bit.
Exactly right.
I mean.
The tool itself isn't bad, it's how it's deployed and somewhat how it's used.
And also as you mentioned the bad actors, for lack of a better term.
But you think about like if the age gate, it is just like realizing, hey, you should be 16 before you drive a car.
Oh, it would be a good idea if we put these seat belts in a car.
Oh, when you ski, maybe it'd be good to have a helmet.
Oh, when you ride a bike, it'd be good to have a helmet.
Oh, there's lead in the water.
Let's get lead out of the water.
And so it's nothing necessarily new in terms of.
You learn and then you adjust.
And so like my book, the first book Social Omics, was you need to get into social tools 'cause it's fantastic.
This could change the way we communicate and do business politics.
And then my last book, the Focus project is an anti-venom to that 'cause people got too far into the phones, you know, they got too far in because I said get into this stuff.
Then I got too far in.
It's like, no, the answer, like a lot of things in life, it's in the middle.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: All right.
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: So these tools are great to stay connected with your friends.
It's just knowing how to use them in the right manner.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: But aren't we gonna head, we're gonna head into a world where we're not gonna have that much external control over it there, right?
In the sense that we are gonna have like a smart contact lens.
I really, I can't believe that hasn't happened yet.
I know that it was, you know, shown at CES several years ago.
For some reason it hasn't advanced.
But, you know, we keep saying, we're gonna take phones outta schools, we're gonna take them outta bedrooms.
But the reality is, at some point you may have a contact lens, which becomes a little more tricky.
Hopefully people would learn how to turn things on and off.
'cause that's reality, right?
We've always had the ability to turn 'em on and off.
And then we end up with something with a chip in our brain,
right?
And at some point we're gonna have to navigate how we have that, where we have constant information flowing in.
How will we decide, again, that, to gate that somehow or to control the flow of it or to decide.
We only wanna see bits of it.
So I think that these are hopefully habits that we are learning to practice now.
'cause then gonna get more and more invasive is my point around
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Yeah.
No, for sure.
And the technology's fantastic.
It's the best time to live.
I mean, an iPad in the classroom is great.
Like it's like a iPad in the classroom, like all the parents lament, there's an iPad in the classroom.
Then I go to Africa.
Oh, we're at a huge disadvantage 'cause we don't have these iPads and so the answer's in the middle,
it's, yeah, the iPad's a great learning tool, but not all the time.
So it's not a hundred percent in the classroom.
It's when it makes sense you use the iPad.
Just like anything new technology, artificial intelligence.
If I can't figure out this math problem, I try it first on my own, then I take a picture of it and then it walks me through how to solve it.
That is super helpful and it's incredibly how smart these kids are gonna be.
'cause they have the answer at their fingertips after they try to deploy their own knowledge first.
That's the key.
Don't default to this stuff first.
Try to write that novel yourself first, and then use AI to help you.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: So, okay, so I was just about to say, so AI in the classroom, how are you feeling about AI being designed to, like, so we talked about tablets.
Yes, I agree.
But AI being able to be, for me a conduit to personalized learning.
Right.
So each child will get what it is that they need and have it be very again, I dunno what the word is, but I guess personalized so that if I go faster on one thing or slow on another thing, I get either advanced or some additional support.
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Yeah, I mean,
it
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: age should that start?
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Yeah.
I mean, some of your listeners might not know this, but I teach a class on digital leadership at Northwestern University in 18 months ago.
AI is coming to the fore in terms of like general population and immediately the university's like can't use AI in the classroom.
I'm like, oh boy, I don't know about that.
'cause All the students wanna learn it.
And so here we fast forward just taught the class two weeks ago, it's like 70% ai.
So it could quickly change, but your initial reactions, fear, keep this stuff out.
Part of the conversations 18 months ago were.
Well, lemme use an analogy.
I know some of you guys were here.
Some of you guys on this call were here when calculators came out.
And that was a big problem.
'cause you're like, you can't have a calculator in a classroom.
That's crazy.
And then over time you realize, wait, yeah, it's sometimes good to use a calculator in the classroom.
Sometimes not.
And so.
A lot of the stuff that we wrestle with, history repeats itself 'cause no one listens the first time.
And so you've gotta look back sometimes to figure out, oh, what was this 40 years ago and how did they to deal with it?
And usually you can find an answer there.
So AI in the classroom absolutely should be used.
I mean, if you think about, most people know what Duolingo is now.
So Duolingo, if you wanna learn a language heavy ai right, and it customizes it, what am I good at?
What am I struggling with?
And learning Spanish.
Okay, now it's tailored to my needs to make me better at speaking Spanish.
And so in more and more classrooms use Duolingo.
If you're teaching Spanish, why wouldn't you?
It's a fantastic tool, and so that's where you need to get to sooner rather than later.
The pushbacks always, no one likes change.
And so the immediate reaction when you don't understand something is just to block it, but then it quickly becomes laughable several years later and you move forward.
So just remember that calculator example.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: I love it.
I think that is very true.
Digital divide.
Now you talked about being in Africa or other parts of the country, could be other parts of the United States.
We saw that during COVID, right?
The schools that had been equipped with tablets ahead of time and had all, not just the tablets, but also the ed techs.
That had walked teachers and families through it and gone through some of those rough moments of figuring out, you know, how to protect kids
mostly on it versus the kids that hadn't, you know, there was one big high school in our dis in our city, not in our district, but in our city.
There was rumored to have had a whole closet full of iPads, but they hadn't deployed them because they didn't have the ed techs to support it.
Right.
And all of a sudden now COVID happens and they have to go figure it out.
So whether it's in the, you know, literally in our same city or whether it's across the world, right.
There's gonna be this really interesting, awareness 10 years from now about those who had really, you know, access to the technology versus those who didn't.
And I think it's gonna be pros and cons on both sides, right?
So as you start to think about it for the families who can't afford it will this be a leveler?
Right?
I think that the fact is it'll become cheaper and more and more accessible to everyone the same way that phones
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Yeah.
Yep.
Yeah, I mean, I'm more of an optimist.
I think technology is a great equalizer.
The one concern, especially as you step into the quantum area, just as the speed is that if we have greater speed to, just to make it
like more of a simplified example, if we have greater speed on a tool like chat GPT than someone in Africa, there still has access.
That's the great equalizer is that really, if you can get access to the internet, which is becoming more and more pervasive, then it's the great equalizer.
The speed does concern me a little bit is that if one's at five times the speed is it's not five times the learning, but it gives you a big advantage if the answer comes back in two seconds versus if it comes back in 50 seconds.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: Yeah, I think that, and that, but I think that in, in some ways what we're gonna find is maybe the person at the 50 seconds, there's a little bit more thoughtfulness than, versus just getting it more and more.
That's what I'm saying is I think that actually we're gonna find that in some ways being either slower or less, you know, having it fully.
And maybe your life might actually turn out to be an advantage.
I think that when you look at it around that world, one of the big key things there is also having the local values be built into it, right?
That we're not just exporting our LLMs everywhere around the world.
And so I think what Switzerland is doing, which they built their own, that has a thousand languages that's used for the public good is a really great example of how this technology can be.
Feel, so it's not just even about access, right?
But it's also around sensitivity to cultural differences and values, norms and all that kind of stuff around the world.
So that we feel as though people all feel as though their cultures are represented in these tools that
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Yeah, no, you're right.
I love what you said about if you have that 52nd lag, that it helps you avoid a pitfall that they've already quickly identified with artificial intelligence.
And as a study done by MIT, that if you just start with the AI rather than you thinking it through, that it actually shuts off.
It doesn't allow that part of your brain to develop.
So they've already come up with some data that's pretty scary around that.
So the key is you wanna think first and then use AI like a coworker
to bounce ideas off of rather than to start with AI is, think about it like a coworker.
That's why artificial intelligence is a bad name.
It should be co intelligence,
but it's really just bouncing your thoughts, your ideas, or you couldn't figure out the math problem To go back to that, you go to the smartest kid in the class and ask him, Hey, I'm struggling with this math problem.
Do you mind helping me?
At lunch treating it like that.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: So you, if you could design an app, 'cause at this point by the way, we could probably prompt our way or bad code our way to one, right?
That pulled us closer together versus further apart using any of these technologies.
Could you imagine what that could look like?
Or would that be you know, something your daughters would be curious about?
You know, I think that there's again, how does this technology pull us closer instead of farther into our own ways of thinking?
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Yeah, it's a, I've never thought about this.
This is the random idea that just popped into my head, and so this is gonna be free flow of thought.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: Love it.
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: But it would be gamifying the system so that if I am, let's just make it a little simpler.
But if I'm texting my friend and after about 15 minutes this alert comes up, your texting is cut off 'cause you've been texting this person for 15 minutes, you have two choices.
You can either call them or go meet with them in person.
And so, and then somehow there's points rewarded for that call or meeting in person.
And so I think that would be fascinating, an app, the way that would work.
And I think it'd be great for adults.
Like you're, hey, you've been texting this person for like a half hour.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: right.
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: It'd be faster.
Our data shows it's gonna be faster for you to call them if they're outta state or if they're in town.
You should set up a meeting or go meet with 'em.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: Well, you know what?
That app would do it also the byproduct of that is then I would be less likely to text in the middle of a meeting or the middle of, you know, someplace else where I couldn't make a call because I would get called out on that one time.
Because I don't think that I am nearly as focused as you would want me to be in some of those environments where I do think that I.
You know, can do the multitasking.
It was interesting, you know, we did the exercise during your talk about trying to write things in, in two different ways when we're toggling back and forth between two streams of thinking and when we're not.
And so we all like to think that we can navigate both at the same time.
That would call me out on that, to be fair.
So
I'd have to be careful about how long I kept my text string
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Yeah.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: We definitely know that those strings are actually really important to people, right?
That incentive to.
Behavior you know, modification in one way or another.
So I like the idea that it would encourage me to call.
I like it,
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: No, it's saying it for good,
right?
Kind of Duolingo is trying to use gamification for good that you can learn a language.
So it's around learning that they uses those tools.
Whereas some of these tools like Snapchat and their streaks, they're using gamification that dopamine hit for nefarious reasons, like to keep you addicted so that I can make more money as a corporation.
And so, that's what I'd like to see.
Yeah, that'd be interesting.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: Well, and I think again, then what would be the business model and the incentive behind that so that it's working for us versus against us.
You know, friend of mine, Jerry Markowski very many years ago, introduced this idea of serve versus stock for these technologies that, again, it's not about the
tech, it's about whether or not it's designed to serve me and to make myself healthier and more connected and whatever the goals that I want versus to stalk me for.
Some sort of commercial gain for a very small number of people.
And another friend who is literally thinking about redesigning the internet, like has been thinking about, it's actually been working on it to build a distributed web where the apps aren't in the center and the the data centers aren't in the center.
It would be literally peer to peer.
And we did a thought exercise at one point about what would you, how can you imagine an internet that worked for me?
Like, and we all were, you know, imagining apps that would be designed, that worked just for us in a way that wasn't designed for the, you know, the commercial purposes that other people wanted to before.
It's a really liberating exercise to go do that, to imagine that again, it could be a really empowering, amazing tool that serves us.
I would
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: That'd be good.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: in that direction.
I know.
Well, hopefully everything that you say from the stage, and I say from the stage, eventually we'll get the next generation of builders and prompt engineers to start building things in that way.
'cause the good news is that will also be more and more distributed.
I think it'll be outside of just the corporations, right?
It'll be this ability for any of us to go build the thing that we wanna go build.
So if you look 10 years into the future, and you think about the kids who had been exposed to this conversation around focus and around, yeah.
What, I don't know the word I was trying to say, but like having some diligence around when you do something, when you don't do something really thoughtfulness Right.
Intention around that versus the kids that you didn't, what do you imagine the world's gonna look like 10 years in advance between those two different kids?
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: My hope is it looks like one big vision board so that they understand the vision.
What are they trying to do with their life?
And so to help me out, this isn't anything new or revolutionary, it's just something.
So the focus project itself was a project I did for two years, supposed to be a year, but focus is really hard.
So it took two years.
And so there a lot of false starts.
But one thing, 'cause people always ask me like, what do you use?
There's a lot of stuff in this book.
What do you use on a daily level?
And one of 'em is these vision boards.
So I'll create, at the beginning of the year, I use mainly, I either hand draw or clip art.
If you're not a good artist, just grab some black and white clip art of what you wanna do
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: I think in the old days we did, we still cut it out by magazines.
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Yeah.
Still cut it out.
Still cut it out.
But like, I'm looking at my vision board right now.
Always in the, in, the bigger the image, the more important it is.
And so you've got this page you're trying to vision, what am I gonna do in the next 12 months?
And so at the beginning, the middles of the family, right?
I've got my two daughters.
They don't look anything like them.
I'm not that good of a drawer.
But then we've got my wife, myself.
So that's big.
You got faith, you know, you got FA family and then I'm gonna learn Spanish.
So that's on there.
I'm just glancing over here.
Golf, I want to get a little better.
So I might have a handicap, try to get my handicap lower.
I wanna write a new book.
I've got that book there.
You get the point.
And then throughout the course of the year, I'm looking at that periodically.
Some, sometimes it might be that week, sometimes it goes a couple weeks.
Then I look at it and I color in how much progress I'm having on each one.
So I always have that vision of like, I need to color in a lot more.
Now, keep in mind, I've never colored in the whole thing completely.
'Cause like my mom always told me, I want you to shoot like, for that the big goal and hope and in I'd rather you shoot for the big goal and miss it than lower the goal and hit
it.
And so it's never completely colored in, but I make sure the big ones are colored in.
So that's the key that allows me to focus.
So if I go a couple weeks where I've got distracted, I'm doing busy.
So I'm doing throughput.
So I'm rocking tons of emails.
I'm doing all these texts.
I feel like I'm working hard, but I'm not producing anything.
I'm not getting to the output.
I'm not going closer or stepping towards that vision or goal.
So that's what helps me.
These vision boards help me tremendously.
And it's old school, right?
It's a piece of paper with these images that I'm coloring in.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: Well, I was just thinking about, we were talking about apps that would actually be a really interesting app, right?
It's to design that digital vision board and then to your point, have.
Partly that you're filling it in, but partly also that it would, I mean, I'm just being like totally like wacky right now, but it would see how I'm spending my time, right?
It would see if you went to play golf because it would be in your calendar or not, it would see whether or not you spent time talking to these various people that were really important to you or not.
And it would actually help, like color that in.
It would almost be a reflection of how you're really spending the time as opposed to you, you know, self-reporting.
That would've to be really
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: be good.
That'd be good.
And sometimes, I mean, obviously if you put that picture and made it digital, it could, like I have a goal, I wanna read 42 books this year.
And so it could pull in from Good Reads, 'cause I'll
write a review now that there's ai, it's a lot easier to write a review, but is write a review about a book.
But it could pull that in so I don't even have to color it in if I want.
Didn't wanna.
It's tracking it for me.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: I mean, I think there's something very satisfying, surely about Keller and in, but just as you're talking about it, it just would be interesting to have back to your point around focus, right?
The idea is that you make really clear what the priorities are.
In your life.
And then it helps you nudge you along the way to help you figure out if you're making the progress against those things or not.
I think you talked a lot about from the stage, right, about being really clear on the goal and being flexible about the path that gets you to the goal.
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: You gotta be firm in your destination, but flexible in the path.
'cause it used to be you could set goal and then you have a linear progression towards set goal.
That's impossible.
Just because the world's changing too quick.
There's gonna be hurdles put in your place.
So it's really about being firm in your destination and flexible in your path and how you get to that destination.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: Is there one example that you can give that would be maybe parenting related
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Oh, parenting related.
That's a good question.
Let's see.
Parenting, I guess this might be.
Relatable is so to focus.
One of the biggest keys to focus is being able to say no to almost everything that allows you to say yes to the big things.
And so one of, when you look at that, so my firm destination is I wanna get better at saying no.
And like you and a lot of listeners, were people pleasers that serves us well most of the time.
But if you say yes to everybody, you're really saying no to everyone.
'cause you're not gonna be able to go do a good job if you're saying yes to everybody.
So you're really saying no.
And so you're gonna drop the ball on something if you say yes to everybody.
So that allows me, at least in my mind, okay, that gives me pause.
Like, okay, I'm actually doing a favor when I say no.
And so you have to have a system in place.
In order for you to be get to that firm destination.
So there's gonna be hurdles that come up where you're gonna say yes when you don't want to, but over time you get better at this.
So I think a lot of, you'll be able to relate to
this.
So I set up, when I was writing the project, I go, wait, I've gotta test this.
And so I volunteer my time to teach at our church Sunday school.
Then invariably I have two daughters so I want to teach with them 'cause it's more time with them.
And I travel quite a bit 'cause what I do, speaking on stage, but is invariably they wanted, they needed volunteers to handle the boys.
'cause when they're, this is when the girls were a little younger.
The younger boys are a little harder, more rambunctious little more energy.
So they have a tougher time getting volunteers.
So invariably I'd get a call midweek, Hey, I know you signed up for the girls.
Can you handle the boys?
And so I, I didn't want to, but I'd be like, what kind of volunteer am I?
It's just on my terms.
And so I go, okay, I'll do it.
And then I'm doing this project.
I get an email, Hey, can you do the boys?
And I reply back.
Hey, I'd love to, but you know, I don't have a lot of time with my girls 'cause I'm traveling.
I wanna spend as much time with them.
So I'd really prefer to do the girls thank you very much.
And felt terrible, but sent it back.
I'm like, ah, I can't believe I did that.
If I wasn't writing this book, I wouldn't have been able to do that.
But man, that felt good.
I'm like, nah, I get to spend time with my girls this weekend and then about 48 hours I get an email back.
I know you said no, but we're really in a tight spot.
I'm like, can you take the boys?
I go, oh my gosh, I'm about to cave like I normally would.
And I go, Nope, I gotta test this stuff out.
I gotta have a system in place.
So I copy and paste the exact same email I sent, modified maybe 1% of it.
It set it back and then I got to teach my girls.
It was great.
And it's the person they switched.
They found a woman to switch in to do the boys.
And it's not always gonna be rainbows and unicorns like this, but it turns out she actually enjoyed.
Working with the boys better.
So it was a win-win.
But the more of that story is I had to put a system in
place and now I use that system all the time.
A lot of times it's like, Hey, I'm head's done on a book.
This sounds like a great opportunity for somebody else.
And before I might write, circle back with me in a couple weeks.
Maybe I can do, I'm busy right now.
I might be able to do it a couple weeks.
Don't do that.
Like it's not gonna get any better.
You're not gonna want to do it.
Later.
So the other system I've in place is if it's not a heck yes, it should be a heck no.
So if someone comes up to you and they go, Hey, I've got two tickets to the US Open.
Heck yes, I'm in.
Like, I'll take those.
If they come up to you and say, Hey, there's this networking thing, it'd probably be good.
You're like, ah, I might, I should probably go to that.
It's in a couple weeks.
It is not gonna get any better.
So that should be a heck no.
So if it's not a heck yes, it should be a heck no.
You've gotta understand you only have so many yeses, especially when you think about parenting.
Is it every, yes.
That's not related to your family, is gonna take time from your family.
So it certainly absolutely must be a heck yes.
And we have this, our brains weird in the sense that always thinks we have more time in the future,
which we don't.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: know.
I'm super guilty of that.
Yes.
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: So think get a system in place to not only say no, but make it a quick no.
And when you think about once I interviewed a bunch of people, whether it's sales or whether it's just someone needs you to volunteer somewhere, it's a quick no is much better than a long maybe or a long no 'cause that person's hanging on thinking.
Maybe you can be the volunteer that works at that bake sale that weekend,
where if you're like, I can't do it.
Sorry.
It's just quick and they can move on to the next person.
Same in sales too.
If you ever sit on a sales pipeline, the worst prospect is summons is like, yeah, we're making a decision.
We should known in a couple days.
A couple days go by, I should known a couple more days.
And then they eventually say, no.
You're like, I could have gone and used this time somewhere else, like as a salesperson.
So it's good in both parenting and also in business to get a system in place to say no.
If it's not a heck yes, it should be a heck no.
And a quick no is always better for that person than a long maybe, or definitely a long no.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: Well, I'm just gonna say selfishly, I'm super glad you said heck yes to joining me for this conversation
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: As a heck yes,
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: Because I know again, well, we've talked about it for years, but we never quite pulled it off.
And so I'm super, super grateful that you did this and I. Do think, like helping people.
You know, sort of my takeaways from this again, that if 80% of your time is spent with your children under 18, which I think is true, again, my children are older.
I have, it's not quite that percentage, but I definitely think it's a high percentage.
And so everything that you say yes to that takes you away from your children, takes you away from that percentage, right.
Or not using that percentage.
Well, and we were just, you know, on another conversation talking about how much pressure parents feel right now to try and keep up.
With the outside world with, so the technology demands and the business demands and you know, the uncertainty that exists and so that time becomes even more and more precious for us to be able to focus on.
I love the idea of the vision board and being able to create one that you do every year.
Do you do it with your family?
Do you guys have a joint Family Vision board?
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: we have, I have 'em for the girls.
We do it with the girls.
Yeah, it's great.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: they have one each for themselves.
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: For themselves.
Yeah.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: I think it might be actually interesting.
My, my partner and I wanted to do something like that with him for our relationship.
What are we focused on as a team for the year right now?
So I think that I'm gonna try and bring that back.
We never had, we haven't officially done it yet, but I really wanna do it because I think that to your point.
Even if you're not coloring it in, if it's just in your awareness, you're going to be more focused on it period.
Right.
And you'll have declared it as a priority that deserves your time and attention.
So, and then the last is to have systems in place.
So whether that's your charging your phones in downstairs or whether or not you've got the template email, that makes it easier to say no or, you know, whatever else.
Any other suggestions?
Any one or two you think that we've left out?
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Yeah, I mean I think that, like you mentioned something in your prior conversation this came into my head is
that, so we were fortunate we wanted to go, we were thinking about pulling the girls for school for eight months to go around the world when they're in.
Sixth and seventh grade, it's like sixth and a half grade and seventh and a half grade.
We thought it was the ideal time, and then the world's happening and then everything occurs and the girls really didn't want to go on a eight month.
So we wound up just going six weeks to Europe, which is great.
But the reason I'm telling that story is 'cause you as a parent, sometimes you think you have to come up with these grandiose things that you have to
do this while you're there and it's like we're going to X, Y, Z. But one of the best memories all of us have was it was terrible weather in Belgium.
We wound up just having to be hunkered down in the hotel and we're just making Taylor Swift bracelets together.
And so it's those little things that, those are the moments that
matter.
And so don't, like you mentioned, it's not about keeping up with the Joneses, whether that's tech, technology related or not.
It's just trying to find those mo it's time,
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: I think it's like focus on the moment right?
And the gift of that moment.
I was just telling someone the other day, I remember one of my fondest memories when we went back to Germany and to see our family was being in this tiny
little Airbnb making whatever random dinner we were making there from the ingredients that we had, and watching Herbie the Love bug dubbed in German.
And making and laughing the whole time.
I remember actually that more than I remember some of the sites that we saw or some of the other things that we went and did.
And I will just, since you put the Tswift mentioned that I did listen to your podcast with her last night
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: oh nice.
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: one degree of separation from Tell Taylor now because of your conversation with her.
So, so I recommend anyone goes and checks out your podcast.
You can hear a little bit of Taylor or very articulate answers to your thoughtful questions.
But thank you so much for your time, Eric.
I really appreciate it.
I know that you're, again, busy flying around and that these hours all count.
So thank you for helping us help parents feel a little less overwhelmed by the world and are able to keep their calm and their focus on the stuff that matters most.
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: I love what you're doing.
This is super helpful for everyone and we're all in this together.
No
one has the perfect answer for
everything.
So it's always about that progress versus perfection.
Do the best you can.
Do the best and forget the rest, as I
nancy-giordano_1_09-19-2025_123411: There you go.
Awesome.
Thank you so much my friend.
Safe travels and I'll see you around town soon.
equalman--he-him-_1_09-19-2025_143410: Yeah, it sounds good.
Thank you so much.